Homecoming Princess (Revised)   Part 1 By Arecee   Edited by Holly Hart & Sephrena Miller

I was in the middle of one of my jokes when Mr. Copeland entered the classroom. Unfortunately the rubber band holding my ponytail decided it was time to fail at that moment. My below the shoulder hair flew everywhere around my head.

“Miss Collins, would you please settle down and be seated!” Mr. Copeland ordered, with authority.

Did I hear that right? Did he just call me Miss Collins? I guess my name doesn’t help and I haven’t been in his class long enough for Mr. Copeland to know me, but Miss?

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It was the third week of school and my first week in Mr. Copeland’s English class. I had been transferred into his class because of my foolishness in Miss Franklin’s class. I had been performing one of my stunts in front of the class and hadn’t noticed Miss Franklin enter the room. The rest of the students had though, but I thought the hush that fell was because of my great joking ability. The hush became laughter when she grabbed me by the ear and led me to the Principal’s office and my new home for English studies.

My name is Lynn Collins and I’m a freshman at my new school, Central High School. I live with my mother who gives me nothing but grief about my appearance. Her biggest bitch though, is about my hair. You know how moms are. If it isn’t combed perfectly, and it hangs over your ears - it’s too long. My hair hasn’t been that length since the sixth grade, which explains the rubber band that holds my very nice ponytail, thank you.

Mom puts up with the length because she spoils me. Ever since my father left us, she’s doted over me, and it’s not like I mind. Dad left when I was five years old. Mom went back to work because my father wasn’t making enough to keep us housed and fed. Mom was soon making twice what my father made and he couldn’t handle that. Mom said it was macho bullshit, but it didn’t matter to dad. He got drunk and took off in the car and that was that. We never heard from him again, except for the paperwork for a divorce, which mom signed. Mom’s a realtor and spends a lot of time away from home and when she and I are together, she lets me get away with more than most parents would. This isn’t to say I’m a bad kid; I just like to joke a lot.

Joking is my way of protecting myself at school. I’m not very tall but I am fit. I’m a member of the Central High water polo team and spend a lot of time in the water. It’s the one sport where my size doesn’t make a difference. Out of the water I’d be a sitting duck for bullies, but they respect me for my ability to make them laugh, which brings us to the moment.

I was in the middle of one of my jokes when Mr. Copeland entered the classroom. Unfortunately the rubber band holding my ponytail decided it was time to fail at that moment. My below the shoulder hair flew everywhere around my head.

“Miss Collins, would you please settle down and be seated!” Mr. Copeland ordered, with authority.

Did I hear that right? Did he just call me Miss Collins? I guess my name doesn’t help and I haven’t been in his class long enough for Mr. Copeland to know me, but Miss? I had to set him straight.

“It’s not Mi-,” I was able to blurt out before Mr. Copeland cut me off.

“Not another word Miss Collins, or I’ll send you to the principal,” Mr. Copeland shouted, emphasizing the point by slamming his hand on his desk.

I knew arguing with Mr. Copeland at this moment would be fruitless, so I kept my mouth shut. I would meet with him after class to correct his mistake. Unfortunately my only friend in the class, Mindy, decided his error about my gender was something to laugh about.

“Would you like to share your joke with the rest of the class, Mindy, or would you like to join the excursion to the principal’s office with Miss Collins?” he asked.

“I’m sorry Mr. Copeland. It won’t happen again,” she responded, with a giggle.

“I hope not, Mindy. Okay class, now that our entertainment is over, please open your books to page 47 and we’ll review yesterday’s lesson.”

Mr. Copeland began his review. I looked at Mindy and watched her smirk at me while she tried to stifle her giggles. How in the world could Mr. Copeland have mistaken me for a girl? Granted, I’m not very tall, but geez, I am built like a boy.

Mr. Copeland’s drone ended at the sound of the class bell ringing, to send us off to our next class. Mindy came out of her seat like a shot and ran to me. She grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the room.

“Oh my God Lynn! That was so funny!” she laughed.

I wondered what could be so funny about walking to our second period class. I thought Mindy had lost her mind. “What’s so funny?”

“Mr. Copeland, silly! Thinking you were a girl. I thought I would pee my panties when he called you Miss Collins.”

“I couldn’t help it if my stupid rubber band broke. Let me go back and tell him he made a mistake. Tomorrow everything will be back to normal,” I said.

“Don’t you dare! This is too good to pass up.”

“What are you talking about Mindy?”

“Your hair! Everyone knows you like a good joke. What better way to fool Mr. Copeland?”

“Hello? Earth to Mindy - am I missing something here?”

“You silly goose. This will be the perfect joke! When you go to class, let your hair down and let Mr. Copeland think that you’re a girl. You know how anal he is. We’ll clue in the rest of the class and watch him make a fool of himself every morning. Come on Lynn, this will be fun!” Mindy implored.

Mindy was right, I did like a good joke, but having a teacher assume I was a girl didn’t sound like much of a joke to me. Being small was bad enough, and this would be a blow to my masculinity - a girl, indeed.

“That idea is plain stupid Mindy. I think I would rather put stickum on his desk drawer pulls.”

“Lynn, you’re such a wuss! Please... just try it tomorrow and see the reactions of the other kids? You’ll see! It’ll be funny,” she said.

My resolve was melting, and Mindy could see it by the expression on my face. What harm could come from one day. anyhow?

“Okay Mindy. I’ll do it. But one day only,” I said.

“Ooo, I knew you would,” she exclaimed excitedly, then gave me a hug.

Mindy’s hug made it worthwhile giving in to her.
 

*          *          *
 
The next day Mindy met me before class. “Take out your rubber band, Lynn, I want to do something extra to you hair,” she said.

“What extra?” I asked.

“I have to brush it a little bit. You have to look nice.”

I removed the rubber band and pushed it into my pocket. I would need it after Mr. Copeland’s class. Mindy brushed my hair and pulled it around a bit. When she finished she smiled at her accomplishment.

“There, that’s better, not perfect, but better than a bunch of hair flying around with no purpose,” she said, as she put her brush back in her purse.

We walked into class and heard the giggling of some of the students. They knew what was coming at roll call, and much to my dismay, I did too.

Mr. Copeland called roll and was nice enough to mention that he liked the fact that I had groomed my hair nicely for a change, and finished the compliment with, “Miss Collins.”

The class broke up, with predictable results. Mr. Copeland was furious at the outbreak.

“I don’t know what’s so damn funny, class! There’s nothing wrong with complimenting a young lady on her appearance. You young men should know that! I see enough of you boorish behavior around this school.”

That put the class over the top. Even I was laughing at Copeland’s remarks. I guess Mindy was right; girling up my hair would be funny!
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy and I continued our little prank for the next two weeks. I was tiring of it and was going to tell Mindy it was time to quit. The other students weren’t laughing anymore, and the before class and after class nonsense with my hair had worn thin.

Mindy beat me to the punch. After school one day, we stopped by her place, and she got a crooked little smile on her face. “Lynn, I was thinking, why don’t we play a prank on the whole student body?”

I didn’t like the look she had on her face when she asked me that question. “What kind of prank?” I asked nervously.

I knew how devious Mindy could be, and she knew I would do most anything she asked me to do. I was dead meat when it came to pranks. My hair thing with Copeland had proved that.

“Well, you know the homecoming game and dance are three weeks a way. You know how excited everyone is about nominating their class’s prince and princesses? I was thinking I should nominate you!” she giggled.

“Me? Have you lost your mind? I’m too short to be a prince. The poor princess would be looking over my head,” I replied.

“Not for prince silly, for princess!” she laughed.

I felt my stomach drop. She couldn’t be serious! I knew Mindy had to be teasing me. “You’re not serious are you?” I asked.

“Of course I’m serious! Think of what fun it will be fooling the whole school!”

“Mindy, fluffing my hair for Copeland’s class is one thing, but what you’re asking... can’t happen!” I replied.

“Why not? It would be fun!”

“Well for one thing, I’m not a girl. Don’t you think someone might notice something was missing?” I pointed at my chest.

Mindy giggled when I said that. “You silly goose! All I’ll need is a head shot. We’ll make some posters with your picture on them and ask for their vote. It’s simple. You won’t win, but it would be funny afterward to let everyone who voted for you know that they were voting for a boy.”

“That’s not funny! What happens if I win?”

“You won’t win. Ashley already has enough votes in our class to become princess. Come on Lynn, what could possibly go wrong? Please?”

I started thinking about it and my little devil made my decision for me. You know the one? It was like those cartoons with the good angel on one side and the bad devil on the other. I let the bad devil win the argument since I thought I would be safe.

“Okay, but I can’t look like a clown,” I said.

“Thank God, Lynn! I knew you would do it! I already talked to the event coordinator and submitted your name.”

“You already submitted my name?”

“I had to. Today was the last day, and I knew you would want to pull this thing off.”

“You know me too well, Mindy. This might be my best prank yet,” I laughed.

“Miss Benson let me slide on having your picture until tomorrow, but she said if I didn’t have to her first thing in the morning, you’d be disqualified.”

“I don’t have a picture, so I guess we’re out of luck,” I said with relief.

“Of course you don’t have a picture. I haven’t taken one yet, but before I do, I have to make you into a girl.”

“How are you going to do that?”

“Come on, I’ll show you.” She grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room.

“Sit!” She pointed at a stool in front of a vanity covered with makeup, then turned me to face her. She looked intently at the face of the boy she was going to try to make beautiful. Pulling my hair into a ponytail, she put a scrunchy around it to keep my hair off my face. So far, this had been easy. When I saw the tweezers, I wondered what I had on my face that needed removal. I felt the first eyebrow hair pull out and yelped.

“Sissy! I do this all the time to myself. I only have to pull a few hairs, so this won’t take long,” Mindy said.

Mindy was truthful for once, well kind of. She didn’t take long pulling hairs from my eyebrows, but I had never seen her hands move so fast. After the first sharp pull of the tweezers, the rest became a blur of mild tugs. I hadn’t noticed how much of my brows were disappearing, but Mindy did. She had shaped my brows very nicely but hadn’t realized how much she had plucked until it was too late. Mindy might have been young, but she was an expert at shaping a woman’s brows. She had a look of concern on her face as she began my makeup.

Mindy is fourteen, as am I, but she had the skills of someone much older. She brushed on eye shadow, feathering it softly below my now, very plucked brows. Next came the eyeliner and mascara. She finished by lining my lips with a brush and drawing on lipstick. I thought she was finished - but then she added lip-gloss so that my lips would shine.

I had become mesmerized by what she was doing to me and sat in silence. She removed the scrunchy from my hair and brushed it until it shone. She found a pair of scissors and clipped a little here and a little there. She brushed some more and then sprayed my hair to hold it in place.

When she stepped back and looked at me, she gasped, “Oh my!”

“What’s wrong? Do I look like a clown?” I asked.

“No! Just the opposite. You’re beautiful! Look in the mirror.”

I turned around towards the mirror and stared at the gorgeous stranger looking at me. Her gaze unnerved me as I watched her continue to stare. Why was she looking at me so intently? And why did she have such a look of surprise on her face? I smiled and the beauty returned the gesture. Oh my God! What have we done? It was at that moment I knew what could go wrong.

“Mindy… my God… what are we going to do? I’m gorgeous!” I stammered.

“Take some pictures,” she giggled.

“I’m serious, Mindy! What if I win?”

“I told you not to worry. Ashley has this thing in the bag. She’s the most popular girl in our class, and she’s been campaigning for weeks. I promise you, Lynn, there’s no way you’ll beat her.”

“I hope not,” I replied nervously.

Mindy got a blouse with a scooped neck for me to put on. It was kind of cute; at least that’s what I think a girl would say about it. Mindy took at least twenty pictures of me, and then placed the camera on a tripod and joined me as the timer tripped the lens. We giggled and posed like two schoolgirls. I was having a different kind of fun with Mindy than I usually had. We were two girls having fun, and it was having a profound effect on me. I felt different, and I didn’t know why.

“We’re done with the pictures Lynn, so it’s time to take your war paint off,” Mindy said.

I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror for the last time. I liked the way Mindy had styled my hair. It looked like that girl on ‘Friends’. I had always had a crush on her, but I had never thought I’d ever look like her! The tendrils framed my face and I stared at my reflection. Who are you? I wondered.

I removed my makeup and brushed my hair into a ponytail again. I still looked like a girl. I hadn’t counted on my eyebrows making such an impact. At least Mr. Copeland wouldn’t wonder about them, and hopefully, no one else will notice.

Mom was still at work when I got home so I was able to let my hair down and cover the damage. She didn’t notice anything different so I went to bed after I did my homework and ate dinner.
 

*          *          *
 
The next day Mindy gave my photos to Miss Benson. If I had been aware of their conversation, I would have withdrawn from the contest.

“Here’s Lynn’s photo, Miss Benson,” Mindy said, as she handed my best photo to the contest director.

“My goodness! What a beautiful girl! I’m surprised I haven’t seen her around here before,” Miss Benson remarked.

“She’s very shy and keeps to herself. She doesn’t like to be noticed,” Mindy said.

“Well after the students see her picture, I wouldn’t doubt it if she were to be princess,” Miss Benson said.

“I doubt that. I talked to Ashley, and she told me she has the freshman class sewed up,” Mindy said, with all the confidence in the world.

“Ashley might win the freshman class, Mindy, but the prince and princesses are a total vote of all the classes. After looking at your friend’s picture, I doubt Ashley has a chance. Lynn is much to pretty to lose.”

“I’ll let Lynn know. Thank you Miss Benson,” Mindy said, as she walked toward the door.

“Oh, before you go, Mindy. I forgot to ask you what Lynn’s favorite charity is. If she wins, the school sends one hundred dollars to it in her name. Do you know which one she would like?”

“Um, I think the Cancer Society?” Mindy answered haltingly.

“That’s a good selection, Mindy. You’d better get to class, or you’ll be late.”

“Thank you, Miss Benson.”

Mindy felt sick at the realization that she and Lynn had make a very big mistake. This wasn’t a silly prank anymore and her best friend, a boy, was about to win something he shouldn’t.

“What did Miss Benson say?” I asked, as my very distraught friend walked toward me.

“She said not to worry, Ashley was a shoo in,” Mindy lied to me.

“Thank God! I don’t know what I would do If I were to win,” I said, feeling relieved.
 

*          *          *
 
The days passed and the final votes were counted. Mindy’s greatest fears were realized. I had won homecoming princess for the freshman class. To make things worse I was pissed! My best friend had lied to me and promised me that I would lose!

“Mindy, how could you?” I spat out, as I walked toward my friend.

“I’m so sorry, Lynn. I didn’t know,” Mindy groveled, as tears filled her eyes.

“You promised me that this would all be a joke! ‘Don’t worry Lynn, you won’t win.’ God, what am I going to do?” I asked.

“I don’t know Lynn. This is so messed up!” Mindy sobbed.

I’m a sucker for tears and hated to see my best friend in this state of grief. It went right to my heart. “Mindy, please... stop crying. We have to think of something we can do about this.”

“The only thing I can think of is to confess to what we’ve done and take the consequences,” she replied.

“Okay. We can go tomorrow before school. It’ll make Ashley’s day when she becomes princess.” I laughed, trying to mask my own nervousness.
 

*          *          *
 
The next morning we walked into Miss Benson’s office to confess our misdeed.

“Good morning, Mindy. How may I help you?” Miss Benson asked, in her most cheerful voice.

“Miss Benson, there’s something you must know about Lynn,” Mindy said.

“What’s that Mindy? Is she pregnant?” she laughed.

Pregnancy had become a big topic as of late. Several girls had tested positive and all girls were now suspected of giving up their virginity without using protection. Miss Benson was making a joke, but what Mindy was going to tell her would make her laugh until she cried. Maybe the crying would be more like it, without the laughs.

“Miss Benson, this is Lynn. He’s a boy,” Mindy said as her eyes filled with tears.

I was standing facing Miss Benson. I was wearing my usual boy clothes and my hair was pulled into a ponytail. The only thing feminine about me was my eyebrows, and even they didn’t look it today. I watched as Miss Benson’s face turned pink, and then red. It wasn’t one of those pretty sunset reds either. It was a purplish red that said ‘I’m going to kill you!’

“Mindy, is this some kind of joke? If it is, it isn’t funny,” Miss Benson said.

“No Miss Benson, I wish it was.”

Miss Benson sat in silence, looking first at Mindy and then at me. I could tell she was trying to gain control of her anger at us, and was failing miserably.

“Do you have any idea as to what you’ve done?”

“No, Miss Benson,” I answered.

“I’ll tell you what you’ve done. You’ve committed fraud. To make things worse, you could embarrass the school and add fuel to the argument that we should discontinue these popularity contests. The people that want this stopped don’t realize the good the contest does for the community. Are you two even aware of the commitment for the princesses?”

Mindy and I were silent and the look on our faces said it all.

“No, I didn’t think you did. When the votes were tabulated, the school sent a donation to your favorite charity Lynn. It was accompanied with your picture from the posters you used to get elected. I’m sure you wonder what harm could come from that? The harm, dear boy, is that you have to personally present the check to that charity at a luncheon three days before the homecoming game.”

“But I didn’t tell anyone that I had a favorite charity,” I stammered.

“Your friend Mindy helped you out there. She picked the Cancer Society. That isn’t the only obligation you have either. The day following the game, you have to make an appearance at Mid-town Convalescent Hospital. This was a tradition started forty-two years ago, and we haven’t missed a year since. This kind gesture has led to donations from many of the lonely people whose lives are brightened by this small visit into their lives.”

“But Miss Benson … How am I supposed to do that?” I asked.

“I’m not finished, Lynn. The day of the game, Styles Spa donates a complete makeover for the girls. Because of their generosity we let them advertise on the back page of the game program. These are three things we do for the community, and doesn’t include the responsibilities that you have for the school.”

“Don’t we just have to show up for the game?” I asked.

Miss Benson smirked when I asked that. “You silly little man, the game is the easy part for you! Before the game, we have the photo session with the Midtown Chronicle, and after the game you have to attend the homecoming dance. My sweet Princess, you’re going to have a busy week before the game.”

“But Miss Benson, can’t we give the Princess title to Ashley?” Mindy asked.

“Weren’t you listening, Mindy? Lynn’s picture has been distributed to the Cancer Society, and we also sent the same picture to the newspaper. No, dear girl, you two had better come up with a plan that won’t embarrass the school, and I want it by tomorrow.”

“Yes, Miss Benson,” Mindy replied.
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy and I left Miss Benson’s office and walked toward our lockers. “God Lynn… what are we going to do?” she asked me.

“Don’t ask me. This was your brilliant idea!” I responded angrily.

“I’m so sorry Lynn. I didn’t mean for this to happen. God, if my parents find out about this, I’ll be grounded for the rest of my life!” Mindy moaned.

“You’ll be grounded? What about me? If my mom finds out that I was impersonating a girl to win Homecoming Princess, you might as well find a gun and shoot me. Mindy, I’m so screwed.”

“Lynn, I’m sure we’ll think of something.”

“I hope so. Let’s get to class. We can talk about this at lunch,” I said.
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy and I walked to our class with Copeland. My stomach was in turmoil as thoughts of what I could do to get out of this ridiculous situation raced through my head. My mind had gone completely blank with worry. I didn’t even hear Mr. Copeland call my name for roll.

“Miss Collins. Miss Collins? Do you intend joining us today?” Mr. Copeland sarcastically inquired.

“I’m sorry Mr. Copeland,” I replied, as the class erupted in laughter.

The rest of the class went the same as my mind drifted, trying to think of a solution to my problem. The next three periods went like the first. My level of concentration had never been lower. By the time lunch break came I thought I would puke.
 

*          *          *
 
I joined Mindy by our lockers and we took our conversation outside. “Mindy, I haven’t been able to think of anything to help me out of this mess. Have you thought of anything?” I whined.

“Um, well, I did come up with one thing we might try, and I think it might work,” she replied.

“What?” I asked hopefully

“You have to promise not to get mad…” she said.

“If we can get me out of this mess, I’ll love you forever!”

“Promise first.”

“God Mindy, okay! I promise not to get mad at you.”

“Okay, you promised.”

“Will you please tell me what you want to do?” I begged.

“You’re going to have to become Lynn, the Princess.”

“I already am Lynn the Princess.”

“Right now, you’re Lynn - the boy Princess! You have to become Lynn - the girl Princess.”

“I can’t do that! I’m a boy.”

“Actually, you can. I can help you, and it won’t be hard to do.”

“How are you going to do that?”

“After school, you have to come home with me. I’ll show you how easy it is. Trust me. Lynn. Everything will work out,” Mindy said.

“I trusted you before, and look what it got me into,” I said.

“This will be different. If you look like I think you will, we’ll practice until homecoming. No one will suspect that you aren’t a girl by then.”

“For both of our sakes, I hope not. I think we should tell Miss Benson what we want to do. If she doesn’t go along with it, then we might as well not try.”

“I guess we should say something to her. I’ll meet you after school and we’ll see her.”
 

*          *          *
 
I met Mindy at the lockers and we went to Miss Benson’s office together.

“Well, if it isn’t the bane of my existence,” Miss Benson growled as we entered her office.

“Miss Benson? Lynn and I think we have a solution to our problem,” Mindy stated.

“And what’s that Mindy? Do you have some magic device to turn Lynn into a girl?”

“Um, not exactly, but you’re right about turning Lynn into a girl.”

“Ah, and how do you propose to do that?”

“I’ll train Lynn to act like a girl until this is all over. It shouldn’t be too hard, he really is very pretty.”

Miss Benson thought for a while before she spoke.

“Okay Mindy, I’ll allow it, but if anything bad happens, I’ll disavow any knowledge of your idea. You had better pray that this will work.”

“It will Miss Benson. I just know it will.”

“Lynn, how do you feel about doing this?” Miss Benson asked.

“I’m okay with it as long as it works. If I get caught though, I’ll be dead meat.”

“Well, I’ll help anyway I can. There are some things I’ll bring to school tomorrow. Don’t you dare mention this to anyone else. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Miss Benson,” we both dutifully answered.
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy and I walked home to her house after our meeting with Miss Benson. It was time for Mindy to turn the duckling into a swan.

“Let’s get something to drink. Want a Cokeâ„¢?” Mindy asked, as we walked into her kitchen.

“Sure.”

Mindy took two cans from the fridge and opened them for us. “We have a lot to do if this is going to work. You’re going to have to become a girl as much as possible. That means learning makeup and fashion. You’re also going to have to groom yourself like girl, and we don’t have a lot of time for you to learn. All I ask is that you try as hard as you can for me, okay?”

“I’ll try Mindy. I trust you and I’ll do whatever you ask me to do.”

I felt defeated. I had allowed Mindy to talk me into this stupid thing in the first place, and now I was putting my life in her hands. I was screwed, no matter which way I went. Miss Benson had as much as said my life would be over if we didn’t make this thing right, and I didn’t know what else I could do except trust Mindy. My life felt like it was spiraling out of control.

Did I really want to try to be a girl? I had never really thought about that. When Mindy had made me up for the pictures, it had been fun. It was just fun though, nothing serious … except for the contest screw up.

If it hadn’t been for that, I would have been like any other boy, curious as to what I would look like as a girl. Now, everything had changed. I had to become a girl, at least temporarily, and I wasn’t so sure I wanted to. I remembered the last time I had seen myself as a girl, and I’d asked myself who was I? Was I going to become the stranger I had seen in the mirror? And what would it do to me on the inside? I honestly had no clue how I really felt about all of this.

I had never given much thought about becoming a man, other than the usual guy talk with the few friends I had. Those conversations were pretty much limited to, ‘I wonder if she’s real’ with regards to a girl’s breasts.

We never talked about how hairy we would become or how muscular; it was always little boy talk tittering about anything sexual. Now I was going to cross the line to the other side and I didn’t know the first thing about the side I was already on. I hadn’t started puberty - heck I hadn’t even turned fourteen yet! Now I was about to become a girl. The girls my age in school were starting to develop in their bodies. What would this do to my thinking?
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy interrupted my thoughts. “Lynn, are you alright? You look a bit sick.”

“Sorry, Mindy, I’m okay. I’m just worried that this might not work.”

“You silly girl! Of course it will work.”

“I’m not a girl Mindy. And it scares me when you think that I am.”

“I know you’re not. But it will help if I think of you as my girlfriend and it’ll help you, too. You have to become a girl for this to work, Lynn.”

“I know… but I’m worried something bad might happen.”

“Like what?”

“I could get beat up, or, I could, you know… like it too much,” I whispered.

“Lynn, all you have to do is play at this. You’re taking this much too seriously! No harm will come to you. You’ll probably be sick of being a girl when this is over.”

“I hope so. Okay, where do we start?”

“We start skin deep. You’re not very hairy, but what little you have must go. I want you to jump in the shower while I find some clothes for you to wear. While you’re in there, shampoo and condition your hair. You’ll find a pink razor on the windowsill. You’ll need to shave your legs and underarms. Be careful not to cut yourself.”

“Mindy, I’ve never shaved before. Do I just pull the shaver up my legs?”

“No silly, soap your legs first, that way it won’t drag on your skin.”

“Um, okay.”

I removed my clothes and stepped into the shower. Doing my hair was easy, although I didn’t use conditioner at home. Mindy’s shampoo was a little different than mine. Hers smelled like flowers, while mine didn’t smell much of anything. I washed the conditioner from my hair and had arrived at the moment of truth. It was time for me to shave.

I had always thought that one day I would look in a mirror, grab a can of shaving jell and lather my face. It would prove that I had finally become a man. I could decide whether or not to shave my upper lip, with the hope of growing a moustache or let my sideburns grow long. Now though, I had to confront something altogether different. I had to shave like a woman to rid myself of hair to make myself attractive for men. Did I really want to do this? It didn’t matter whether I wanted to or not. Miss Benson had laid down the law, and this was the first step, like it or not.

I lathered my leg with soap like Mindy asked me to do, but the running water washed it off as fast as I put it on.

“Mindy, I can’t keep the soap on my legs,” I shouted out to her.

Mindy walked into the bathroom and covered her mouth as she giggled, ”Oops! I forgot you aren’t a girl yet.”

I tried to cover myself with my free hand, which was easy, considering the lack of size down there.

Mindy could hardly conceal her laughter as she looked away from me.

“Lynn, put your foot on the shower wall and then lather it. That way the soap won’t come off.” She giggled, “Shall I turn around and show you how?”

“Don’t you dare,” I answered.

Mindy left the bathroom and I did as she instructed. I placed my foot on the shower wall and lathered my leg with the soap. It stayed on like she said it would. I placed the razor on my leg at my ankle and held it there. Would I have the courage to pull it up my leg? If I did, I was giving in to femininity. Oh sure! I knew guys on the swim team shaved their whole bodies, but I wasn’t going to delude myself to think I was doing this for swimming! I was doing it to become a girl! My hand shook as I tried to pull the razor up my leg. Mindy finally broke the spell I had cast on myself.

“Hurry up Lynn! We don’t have all day,” she shouted.

“Okay,” I mumbled.

The razor moved ever so slightly up my calf. It didn’t hurt and to be honest it felt kind of sensual. All my angst had been for nothing. I felt relief as the razor reached the top of my thigh. After that the shave went quickly. I finished my legs and did my pits next. I finished and knew why girls called them underarms, because they felt sexy. I turned off the water and exited the shower. I dried myself with a towel Mindy had brought to me. I felt my legs and much to my concern, they felt nice. They were soft and smooth and as I glanced down at them I realized they were very pretty.

“Lynn, here are your undies.” Mindy handed me a tiny bit of cloth that had lace all over it.

“What are these?” I asked.

“Panties. You certainly don’t think you’re going to become a girl wearing boxers, do you?”

I don’t know what I’d thought, but wearing panties wasn’t one of them.

“Do I have to?” I asked.

“Yes, you have to. Lynn, you’re going to have to get used to wearing nice things like those panties. By the time the Homecoming gets here, you’ll love wearing nice lingerie.”

All of this shaving and paying attention to things girls do was doing something to me, not just on the outside, but on the inside too. My legs looked pretty as did the rest of me, in a flat sort of way. I liked the way I looked. I also liked the way I felt. I felt softer, not just outside, but inside as well. I felt girlish, and I liked it. I felt as though a whole new person was being born.

“We have to something with your chest. Here’s one of my bras. I’ll help you put it on, but next time you’ll have to do it.”

I put my arms through the straps and Mindy hooked the strap behind my back. She started giggling when she saw my chest.

“What’s so funny?” I asked.

“We need to put something in those cups,” she laughed.

I looked and tried to stifle a giggle. The bra looked silly on my flat chest. Mindy took some pantyhose from her drawer and pushed them into the bra cups. It looked better. It also felt wonderful in a scary sort of way. The tightness of the strap around my chest was waking something inside of me. I tried to ignore it, but I couldn’t. I shouldn’t like this… but I was embracing what was happening to me. I looked at the mirror on the door and saw a girl! My hair was messed up and I had no makeup on - but I was a girl nonetheless! I smiled and the girl smiled back at me.

I wondered if this whole thing was going too far. I didn’t mind being made to look like a girl, but what it was doing to me inside seemed altogether wrong. I wanted so badly to be a big guy, and often dreamed of the day when I would finally change into that stud I wanted to be so badly. At least, that was what I’d always thought I wanted.

My penis would grow and so would the rest of me. I often thought about it at night, hoping that my puberty would come soon. Now, as I was being changed into a girl, new thoughts entered my head, and they weren’t good either! My dreams of a having large penis was turning into wanting large breasts. How messed up was that? I think that what was the most disturbing, though, was that I didn’t care about having a large penis anymore! I was thinking more about breasts and what it meant. It was more than a fascination. It also meant that I had desire, in part at least, to become a girl, and eventually a woman.
 

*          *          *
 
“Suck your stomach in,” Mindy ordered.

“What?”

“I said to suck your stomach in. I have to put a waist cincher on you.”

“Why?”

“Because you have no waist. I used to wear this last year before I finally grew some hips. You’re not going to grow hips, so we need to make you look like you have some.”

“Oh.”

I sucked my stomach in, but it wasn’t enough for Mindy to hook the back.

“Can you reach the top of the door?” she asked.

“I think I can, why?”

“Don’t ask why, just do it.”

I jumped up and curled my fingers over the top of the door. I noticed that it made my waist seem smaller.

“Now lift your feet off the floor,” Mindy said.

I did as instructed and felt the fabric around my waist grow tight as Mindy was hooking the clasps.

“There, done. You can let go now,” she said.

I let go and couldn’t breathe.

“Mindy, what did you do? I can’t breath!!!,” I whispered breathlessly.

“Don’t be such a whiner! All of us girls go through this bit of fun to look nice,” Mindy replied.

I could suck in enough air to keep from passing out - but just barely.

“Okay, it’s time for me to go to work,” Mindy said. “Sit down over here. It’s time to make you pretty.”
 

*          *          *
 
I sat on the stool next to Mindy’s makeup table, watching the evil grin on her face as she reached for her eye shadow collection. I won’t bore you with what she did next, but when she was done, the Homecoming Princess looked back at me from the mirror. I was in awe! Omigosh wow! I was speechless! The princess in the mirror was me!

“Okay, girlfriend! Time to get dressed,” Mindy said.

She went to her closet and removed a skirt and sweater.

“Here, let’s try these. The zipper goes in the back.”

Trying not to be clumsy as my mind was still reeling from what I now looked like, I lowered the sweater over my head, being careful not to mess my hair or get makeup on it. I stepped into the skirt and pulled it up my legs. I found that it wasn’t long enough.

“Mindy, this skirt’s too short,” I said.

“Are you serious Lynn? That’s how long it’s supposed to be. If it was any longer you wouldn’t be able to show your pretty legs.”

“I don’t want to show my legs! Please! Mindy! I just want to get through this thing!” I whined with trepidation.

“Lynn, if you want to learn how to be a girl our age, you have to become one. This is us, dear friend.” She pointed at my skirt.

I don’t know why the skirt was bothering me so much. I wore speedos at water polo shorter that that skirt. But for some reason, I felt exposed dressed as I was. I looked back into the mirror once again and realized my worst fears! My legs were feminine looking! In fact, most of me was feminine looking! This was so messed up!!!

“You know, you have pretty legs, Lynn,” Mindy said.

“Just what a guy likes to hear, Mindy,” I replied, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

“Maybe a guy doesn’t, but a girl does,” she replied.

Her compliment did sound nice, but it was wrong for me to like it! I wasn’t yet giving up hope of finally becoming a man.

“Mindy, this isn’t right. I don’t look anything like a boy anymore.”

“No you don’t! You have to become a girl for the next week and a half, and I really don’t want to see anyone but my pretty girlfriend when we’re together,” Mindy said.

“Do you really think I’m pretty?” I asked, wanting to know if what she said was true.

“Lynn… you’re gorgeous! I am jealous.”

“Of me?”

“Yes, of you! You’re my best friend and I wish I was as pretty as you are.”

“I think you’re pretty,” I replied.

“Thanks girlfriend, but you stand out. You are a Homecoming Princess!”

“Am I really that pretty?” I asked, trying for more compliments.

“Enough already, Lynn! You know you are. But looks aren’t everything. I look at you and see a pretty boy, but next week you have to be a girl, not a boy.”

I felt disappointment at that statement. When I saw myself in her mirror, all I saw was a girl. What was Mindy seeing that I had missed?

“I don’t understand Mindy. I won princess.”

“Your picture won the freshman Princess title, but now you have to become the girl that won. Being a girl is more than wearing some makeup and clothes. Being a girl comes from inside. When you become that girl you’ll understand what I’m saying to you.”

“How am I supposed to do that?”

“You’ll have to learn. You will have to move like a girl and think like a girl. We don’t have much time, Lynn, and now that you’re dressed as a girl we’ll work on you becoming one.”

I won’t bore you with what we did for the next three hours, but I no longer have a fear of high heels. I can also sit without showing my panties to the world. But I also found out that I was having fun in becoming a girl. My training ignited a spark deep within my brain - one I wasn’t able to extinguish… but enough of that until later.

“Lynn, it’s getting late, and my mom will be home soon. You have to change,” Mindy said.

I thought I would find relief when she said that, but I couldn’t have been more mistaken! I had grown to like Lynn - the girl, and changing out of these clothes would be like losing a close friend. Mindy helped me to remove my makeup and I was left to change back into my boy clothes.

Mindy asked, “What’s wrong, Lynn?” when she saw the look of disappointment on my face.

“Nothing,”

“You miss her, don’t you?”

Was it that obvious? “A little.”

Realizing that a special moment was occurring for her friend, Mindy commented, “Being a girl is different than what you thought it would be, isn’t it?”

“Kind of, I suppose. I thought it would be like a disguise or something. You know, put it on and take it off? I didn’t realize that I would… become a girl.”

“You finally did?” she incredulously asked.

I felt my face becoming flush. How was I going to tell my best friend that I was finding something inside me that I hadn’t known existed before? I hadn’t become a girl… well some small part of me had, but was I going to admit that to my friend?

“Mindy, that’s silly. I’m still one hundred percent American boy,” I replied with obvious uncertainty.

“Look Lynn, there’s nothing wrong with finding out that you like something new you discovered about yourself. You don’t have to hide it from me, I can tell something is bothering you.”

“Mindy, there is something wrong with this! You aren’t the one that’s going to get her ass kicked when she’s found out!”

“Then that’s just one more reason for you to take this seriously! Lynn, you have to make up for years of lost time becoming a girl. I was born this way, and you have to become as much of a girl as I am in a very short amount of time. I see something in you that says that you can do this. Trust me girlfriend, in two weeks, you’ll have forgotten all about that boy you think you are.”

“That’s what I afraid of Mindy! I’m not sure I want to even try to be a girl!”

“Sweetie, give it a few days. You’ll see. We’re going to have so much fun together!”

“I hope so Mindy, I truly do.”
 

*          *          *
 
I went home and Mom was wondering what could have taken me so long to do my homework.

“Mindy and I are doing a special project, Mom,” I replied.

“I like Mindy. She’s had nothing but a positive influence on you since you met her. I thought I would have to hire a tutor to improve your grades, but Mindy’s doing that for you,” Mom said.

“Yes, Mindy’s been very helpful,” I said.

“Does she have a boyfriend, or are you hers now?” Mom giggled.

“MOMMM! We’re just friends,” I said. Oh Mom, if you only knew!

I helped Mom with the dishes and went to my room. My thoughts were constantly returning to my training session with Mindy. I couldn’t help but think of the pretty girl that looked back at me the first time I saw her in the mirror. I had fallen in love with her the moment that I saw her! I wanted her to be perfect. I realized then that I had been given a gift. I had made up my mind and was determined to become her. I wanted to become Homecoming Princess for our school! I wanted to be… a Princess!

I went to bed and dreamed all night. Each dream was different, except for the fact that in every one of them, I was always a girl. I was a girl with Mindy and her friends. I was a Princess and lost my slipper like Cinderella. On and on it went - but I was never Lynn the boy!

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised)   Part 2 By Arecee   Edited by Holly Hart & Sephrena Miller

“Lynn! This is what girls do! We shop! We try things on even if we have no intention of buying them. Why do you think it takes so long for us to shop?”

“I don’t know.”

“Because we’re having fun! We are trying to find clothes to look good in and impress boys and other people, it takes time to see what looks good on each of us. So get a move on! The stores close in four hours.”

Four hours? What the heck is that? Shopping takes fifteen minutes!

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
I awoke and it was morning. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so rested before! I remembered what I had felt last night… and the dreams! Wow! I was really confused at this point.

I met Mindy before school started.

“Hey girlfriend, did you sleep well?” she asked.

I felt my face go red.

“Mindy, please! Keep your voice down. I don’t want anyone to find out about this,” I excitedly shushed.

“Lynn, you worry too much. No one is going to know.”

“Mindy, the walls have ears. We have to be careful!”

“We will. I have to see Miss Benson this morning before classes start. I’ll see you in Copeland’s class.”

“Okay, bye Min.”
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy poked her head into Miss Benson’s office. Miss Benson wanted a progress report to see if what they were doing would succeed.

“Good morning, Miss Benson,” Mindy said.

“Good morning Mindy. Please come in and shut the door.”

Mindy entered and pulled the door shut before approaching Miss Benson’s desk.

“Well Mindy, how did your first day with Lynn go?” Miss Benson asked.

“It went real well Miss Benson. Lynn’s a very pretty girl.”

“Hmm, I wouldn’t go so far as to say he was a girl.”

“If you had seen him last night, you might think differently!”

“I doubt that Mindy. How much did you do? Did he dress, or did you just do makeup?”

“Oh we did everything: makeup and clothes. After Lynn dressed, I helped him with his movements to become more feminine. I thought he would have problems, but he was a natural and made it look too easy. He was walking in heels without problems in minutes! He sat and walked as if he was born a girl! It was really kind of creepy. I hope this isn’t going to mess him up,” Mindy mentioned with a twinge of fear in her voice.

“Mindy, I highly doubt that dressing or acting as a girl for a week is going to hurt him. This little punishment can’t hurt anyone. As for the ease for which he picks up on feminine movements, I’ve seen kids start playing ball with as much confidence and ease as someone that has done the same for years. No, Lynn will be just fine. But is there anything I can do to help with this deception?”

“There is one thing, he needs better boobs. My rolled up pantyhose really isn’t convincing.”

“I may just have the answer for that,” Miss Benson raised an eyebrow as she shifted in her chair, “A few years back, there was a girl in one of our school plays that was, well, let’s just say that she was inadequate in that department, and the school bought a very nice pair of silicone breast forms for her to wear for the part. After the play was over, they weren’t needed and I retained them. Come back here this afternoon and I’ll have them for you. We do want to make Lynn as convincing a girl as possible.”

“Yes Miss Benson.”
 

*          *          *
 
The school day was cut short by a teachers meeting so Lynn and Mindy were home by two. Mindy picked up the forms from Miss Benson with the solvent and glue for attachment and removal.

“Lynn, guess what?” Mindy giggled.

“Hmm?”

“Today you’re going to become a girl!”

“What?! You mean you are you going to cut my… you know… thing off?”

“Nope. Today, you get your own boobs!”

“My own boobs?”

“Yes! Here look,” Mindy, said, as she opened the box containing the breast forms.

I looked at the things in the box. I knew exactly what they were as soon as I saw them. They looked as though they had been removed from a real girl - nipples and all!

“Mindy!” I gasped, “Where did you get those?”

“Miss Benson got them for me from the drama department. Some girl was too flat for a play, so they helped her along,” she giggled.

I felt lightheaded and embarrassed. This was starting to get real deep!

“So what am I supposed to do?” I asked.

“Now you lay down on my bed and I’ll attach them to your chest.”

“With what?”

“A special glue that comes with them in the box. Don’t worry though,” she continued as she lifted a tube of something up out of the box to show me, “they come right off when we apply this solvent. Now lay down girl.”

As I lay down, Mindy was looking at the back of the glue tube. “Hmm,” she scrunched her face, “it seems I will have to apply a few drops only to hold it onto you. The normal amount of glue will stick it to you for 3-5 days and will not come off easily before that even with the solvent.”

I gulped.

“Here we go girl,” Mindy enthused as she put four small dots of adhesive around my left boy nipple area.

“Mindy! That stuff is cold! ”

She just smiled. I was beginning to think she was enjoying doing this just a little too much!

“Mindy,” I said as she held the first form in place for it to set, “I have been feeling a lot of things in the past few days and I want you to know something. I do not want to be a girl.”

Mindy eyed me and retorted. “You are not going quit now… are you?”

I opened my eyes and looked directly at her. This seemed to be one of those important moments, so I steeled my nerves up and then said my piece.

“I’m not quitting, I just said I am not going to be a girl. I’m doing this for the joke even though I know I am probably going to be in a lot of hot water when all of this is over. Whether I get away with it or not, I think it will be my masterpiece.”

Mindy seemed to relax then and then stuck her tongue out at me as she let go of the form and began applying the glue in four small dots around my other nipple area.

“You just don’t know what you’re missing,” she quipped as she worked.

“I… am… a… boy! I have things I want to do with my life Mindy. Well, I know I do, I just haven’t decided what they are yet. I am sure I will know before we graduate from school. And besides, you got me into this.”

“Did I?” Mindy was now holding the other form to me. Her eyes always seemed to be capable of melting my heart and that’s exactly what she was doing to me now. I know the joke in Copeland’s class kinda developed a life of its own through Mr. Copeland’s ineptness, but Mindy did escalate it!

In the end, I caved in. “Ok, I guess we both did. I did agree to it.”

Mindy beamed back, “See? You are learning. Girl’s are always right! When you can get others to do that for you, you are well on your road to femininity.”

I just groaned.

Soon the cold blobs on my chest warmed up as they for all intents and purposes became a part of my anatomy.

“Okay, it’s time to dress you!” Mindy ordered.

I rose from the bed and felt my chest pull me forward. Wow! This feels awkward!

“Mindy, these are heavy!” I whined.

“Girl, that’s what we have to put up with for the rest of our lives, so you might as well get used to it,” she said with no sympathy for me whatsoever, “Which do you want to do first, makeup or clothes?”

I thought about it a little and decided clothes first. I realized that putting makeup on first would only smear it, or worse, get it on the clothing. And also, when Mindy put my makeup on afterwards, I would feel like I was already a girl with her friend playing makeup instead of a boy crossing the line.

“Clothes first,” I replied.

“That’s correct. You do clothes first and makeup afterwards. It would just smear if you tried to put on clothes after doing it unless you could really manage somehow to do it without smearing it. It’s easier afterwards.”

Mindy then handed me a pair of panties and a bra. I turned my back to Mindy and removed my underwear and pulled the tiny thong up around my legs and then tucked myself in between my legs by pushing my boy parts up inside. I turned to face her.

“Mindy, could you please help me with the bra?”

Mindy looked at me and didn’t say a word. I can’t say what her expression was saying, but she looked both pleased and scared at the same time.

“What’s wrong?” I asked when she didn’t answer.

“How did you just do that?”

“Do what?”

“Down there. You are flat. It’s like you have nothing there. You are flat as girl.”

I blushed rather fiercely. “Mindy, I have been… well… always able to do that.”

“Are you sure you really aren’t a girl?” she pointedly questioned me as she looked me up and down.

“Mindy, you know I’m not!” I said pointing at my panties - oops! I mean Mindy’s panties.

“I know Lynn! It’s just that you look so much like one that it’s scary!”

I felt my eyes water slightly. This was yet another blow to my maleness. I know what she was saying was true. I knew it ever since she made me up the first time a few days back. I just wanted to ignore it and just be my old self: Lynn. The boy Lynn!

“It scares my too. But,” I tried holding back from crying as I choked up for a moment. “The thing that scares me even more… is that sometimes I find… I really like the way that I look as a girl! Is that bad?”

Mindy pulled me into a gentle hug. “Goodness no girl! You should feel proud of the way you look. You are special. And I am not going to hurt you through this, ok ?”

I let a few tears trickle out and returned her hug. “Ok. I trust you.”

Mindy let go and smiled. She then hooked my bra around my chest for me. Mindy then handed me a skirt and what I assumed was supposed to be a blouse.

“What do I do with these?” I asked.

“Put them on silly. The blouse goes on first, then the skirt. The zipper goes around in the back,” she giggled.

I shook my head. Mindy was having way too much fun at my expense. I know she wasn’t doing this through meanness — more like curiosity. Oh well! I lowered the blouse down over my head and pulled the skirt over my butt and positioned it after I zipped it up halfway. Once it was positioned, I finished by managing to pull the zipper up with my arm behind me. The zip made it fit me like a glove.

“Wow! You really do look nice!” Mindy exclaimed.

I didn’t think there was anything nice about it, especially with the way it exposed navel. I felt naked! God!

“Mindy!” I whined, “this doesn’t fit, it’s too short!”

Mindy rolled her eyes as if I had just said the stupidest thing in the world.

“Lynn, these are the clothes girls wear! They are designed to show off parts of our bodies. Now sit down please. I have some serious war painting to do,” she said pointing at the chair in front of her makeup table.

It didn’t take Mindy long before Princess Lynn was again staring back at me from the mirror. She was even more beautiful than the last time — if that was even possible! A feeling of giddiness swept through me as I watched her facial movements in the mirror.

Mindy had brushed my hair into something that looked as though it belonged on me as a girl! It just somehow felt good - being this! It’s something I couldn’t exactly quantify at the time and had no words for just how I felt, but needless to say, I was overwhelmed! Stunned. I liked the girl that was staring back at me, and frighteningly, more than I should!

“Ready to go?” Mindy asked excitedly. My gaze was still locked onto the image of beauty in the mirror before me.

“Go?” I answered nervously with a sniffle.

“It’s going to be ok. I promise you, if this gets to be too much for you, we will tell Miss Benson and call this all off and accept whatever punishment we get. Both me and you.”

“Ok Mindy. I just feel like… I’m… losing myself, somehow.”

Mindy, looking concerned as she helped me stand up out of the chair replied, “You aren’t losing yourself Lynn. You are just learning new things. All of this is to help you pull off the prank and finish up what needs to be done for the Homecoming Princess duties. Once it’s over with, you don’t have to do any of this anymore unless you wanted to.”

“But right now, we need to buy you your own things to wear for your appearances. And it’s really time that you learned how to shop. Real girls know how, so you have learn too.”

“Why do I have to learn that?”

“Because you’re a princess! Girls are princesses and for the meantime, until we get through this, you are going to have to become a girl. Here’s my spare purse you can use for your things,” Mindy said as she handed me her denim purse to hang on my shoulder.

“I don’t have anything to put in it,” I mentioned.

“Not now, but you will by the time we come home.”

“Like what?”

Mindy screwed her face up before she answered.

“Lynn you need makeup! You can’t continue to use mine, and you’ll be surprised at the things that will find a home in there. Now get a move on!”
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy and I boarded the bus to the mall. We walked to the rear and found an empty seat. I felt as though every eye in the bus was watching me. Actually there were six and they were in the heads of three boys sitting in the rear seat. As I lowered myself to sit, I felt as though all my clothes had been removed!

“Mindy… those boys know!” I stammered in a hushed whisper.

“Know what?”

“That I’m… you know!”

“Lynn, they don’t think that,” she glanced behind us for a second and then continued, “They think your pretty girl and that’s what boys do when they see a good looking girl.”

“I don’t like it!”

“Well, you’d better get used to it girlfriend! You’re in my world now,” she giggled.
 

*          *          *
 
The bus pulled away from the stop and before I could even think, I noticed a shadow next to me in my peripheral vision.

“Hi! I’m Dan,” stated the boy who had stared at me the most. “What’s your name?”

My stomach turned. My mouth locked shut as I expected him to start laughing at the freak dressed like a girl! I felt Mindy bump me in my side with her elbow.

“Um, I don’t know if… I should tell you. I don’t… even know you,” I finally said, as my brain and mouth began working.

“If you give me your phone number I’ll call you and then, over time, you’ll get to know me,” he confidently replied with an expectant look on his face.

That was just so-so stupid! I could just see my mom’s reaction to me running down the stairs to the phone excitedly to talk to another boy. I couldn’t help but bust out giggling.

“My mother would kill me if I did that! I’m only fourteen and I’m not allowed to get calls from boys just yet,” I said.

“I could pretend to be a girl?” Dan laughed.

In your dreams! “Your voice is too low.”

“Hi, my name is Danni,” he squeaked.

Mindy and I couldn’t help ourselves as we both erupted in laughter.

“You sound like Minnie Mouse,” Mindy giggled.

“It was worth a try! Please?” Dan pleaded.

“I can’t,” I said solemnly, with a sense of fear.

Dan, heartbroken, turned and walked away back to his seat. For some reason I felt really bad about having to turn him down. There was a sense of power in how I controlled that situation, something I was not used to and never did before! The reason that I couldn’t give him my number was true enough, but what would he do to me if her found out about me? And then, here we go again, Why would I want to be with a boy in the first place? I am a boy! God! This was getting hard for me to do!

His attention to me did boost confidence about my appearance and my worries about being discovered pretty much vanished.

Mindy had a puzzled look on her face after he had left.

“What?” I asked.

“You know what Lynn? You shouldn’t be flirting with boys. I know Dan came over here, but you teased him just the same.”

“I did not!” I hushedly spat. “I told him no.”

“Your giggles told him something else! It’s one thing to dress like a girl and entirely another to flirt with boys.”

“I wasn’t flirting!!” I whined.

“You were! And you’d better be careful. You can hurt someone’s feelings,” she said with concern in her voice.

I wasn’t sure what to think now! Mindy had pushed me into being this new person and now she was scolding me for being too good at it? I knew I wasn’t flirting and what harm could come from a few giggles?

We rode in silence for several minutes before Mindy spoke again.

“Lynn, look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been so critical of you. You are new at this and have to learn about boys, that’s all. I’ll show you how to blow a guy off without making him think you interested in him. By the way, you do have good taste in boys though. Dan’s really cute,” Mindy giggled.

I felt my face turning red again because Mindy was right - Dan was cute! Even worse, I noticed that he was. That was why I had been afraid! Is it wrong for me to notice that or was it the girl I was portraying now that had noticed? God! I hoped with all my might that it was the girl portrayal!
 

*          *          *
 
We reached the mall and rushed from the bus before Dan and his gang of merry men could join us. Mindy walked behind me for a few steps and shook her head.

“Now what?” I asked as I stopped and turned to see what she was doing. The wind chilled my bare midriff.

“I just can’t believe how easily you slip into being a girl! You walk like one, move like one, and look like one! If I didn’t already know you, I would never even know you weren’t a girl! I don’t think we have any problems with you passing.”

I let the wind blow my hair and skirt about for a few moments while I took in what she had just said.

“Thanks… I think…”
 

*          *          *
 
The first stop was Target.

“We have to get you your own makeup. You will need your own mascara for sure, so you might as well get the rest,” Mindy explained.

I’m no expert on makeup, that’s for sure; but I wondered if Mindy was leading me down my path to destruction? I had clearly rebelled in not going too deep into this and here I was succumbing to her logic. I had no idea there was so much stuff for eyes alone! Needless to say, I was now the proud owner of an eye kit with more shades of eye shadow than I thought existed. That didn’t even count the eyeliner and the pencils to go with it. Mindy said that I was getting off easy because everything was half off because of the recession. Fifty dollars is fifty dollars - no matter how recessed we are!
 

*          *          *
 
“Good! Now that that’s out of the way, we can have fun!” Mindy gleefully said as she gave me another of her evil grins. She dragged me by the hand into the mall.

“Where are we going?” I asked. This whole experience was really overwhelming me!

“Forever Twenty-one. You need clothes!”

“Mindy, I don’t have much more money! We just spent it all on makeup,” I panicked.

”We’re not going to buy anything — we’re just going to try everything on!”

“Huh?”

Mindy stopped and looked at me.

I reasoned, “If we’re not going to buy anything then why try it on?”

She had this look on her face that asked ‘what cave did I just crawl out of ? ’.

“Lynn! This is what girls do! We shop! We try things on even if we have no intention of buying them. Why do you think it takes so long for us to shop?”

“I don’t know.”

“Because we’re having fun! We are trying to find clothes to look good in and impress boys and other people, it takes time to see what looks good on each of us. So get a move on! The stores close in four hours.”

Four hours? What the heck is that? Shopping takes fifteen minutes!

“Mindy, what if someone sees me?’

“Girl, everyone’s going to see you! Let’s see… most of the other girls that do see you will be jealous because you’re so pretty. Any guy in the store will get in trouble with their girlfriends because you’ll cause a stir. So that pretty much covers that! Let yourself go. You’ll be fine!”

“I hope so,” I mumbled.
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy dragged me into Forever Twenty-One and showed me the racks of clothes I should want. The trouble was, I didn’t want any of them. I wanted to be me! Lynn - the boy, again. I absolutely knew that if I traveled this path much farther I wasn’t going to turn back. I knew that as I analyzed my thinking, my rationality was starting to not make sense at all. I was enjoying being a girl and here with Mindy. I was a princess, not some geeky boy, but a girl all the boys wanted! The only trouble was - I wasn’t a girl! I finally decided for the meantime to let Mindy mold my life. The hell with it! Go with the flow! Yep! That was really the answer… NOT!!!

“Oh God! Lynn this is so cute!” Mindy exclaimed, as she held up a blouse against my chest. “Don’t you think so?”

“Umm, I don’t know.”

“Try it on, you’ll love it! Wait! Don’t go yet. You’re allowed six items at once in the dressing room so we might as well break the bank,” she giggled.

Mindy found more clothes for me try on. Skirts and blouses seemed to be what turned her on. I took the clothes back with me to the changing room and was handed a plastic card with the number six by the attendant.

I won’t bore you with the on and off of the clothes details, but Mindy thought that I looked hot. Hot in everything I tried on! *sigh* Personally I thought it was a lot of work, work that is, until she brought me a dress. Once I slipped that dress on I finally knew why girls spent so much time shopping. It had taken an hour to find it, but this dress was made for me! I fell in love with it immediately. It wasn’t just a dress; it was how it made me feel, how it looked, how it hugged my body and accented my features! Oh, it looked good in the mirror, but that’s not what made this dress special. When I saw myself in the mirror with the dress on, something inside me changed. I wasn’t Lynn the boy trying on clothes, but I was Lynn, a girl, shopping with my girlfriend, and finally finding the perfect dress! I stepped from the dressing room.

“What do you think?” I asked, turning around in front of the full-length mirror and pausing to look at Mindy’s reaction.

“It’s you Lynn. I love it,” Mindy responded.

“I want to buy it.”

“What?”

“I want to buy this dress. I have to have it!” I emphasized.

A frown clouded Mindy’s face.

“What’s wrong now?” I asked.

“Nothing’s wrong Lynn. We came here for you to learn what it’s like to be a girl… not to really become one. I thought you would have fun shopping like we do, but I never expected you to want to buy your own dress. What are you going to do with it?”

“Wear it?” I answered meekly.

“And where would that be? At school or with your mom? I don’t think so Lynn. All we’re doing is trying to make you passable as a girl, not to become one.”

“Okay,” I answered sheepishly, my heart broken at realizing I couldn’t have this wonderful piece of material to wear. I twirled again and asked, “Min, honestly, how does it look?”

“It looks gorgeous on you, you little minx! Now put it back,” she giggled.

I sullenly removed the dress and returned it to the dressing room attendant. I was going to miss it- no matter what Mindy said!
 

*          *          *
 
We continued to shop at store after store. So this was what it was like being a girl? I was laughing and interacting with Mindy very differently than when I was with her as a boy. When I went to the mall with my guy friends, things were different as well. What was said was generally crude. “Look at the boobs on that one, snort, snort.” or, “I hear Bob is getting into Judy’s pants.” Then it was silence as we played video games at the arcade.

Being with Mindy now was a whole different experience! We didn’t stop chatting or giggling the entire time we were together. “How does this look?” “That’s cute.” “I’d die before I got caught wearing that.” “Did you see that guy over there? He was watching you.” The guy talk was never too crude, not that I wanted anything to do with them, but the difference between boys and girls was astonishing. I definitely had my eyes opened with this experience.
 

*          *          *
 
We had finally reached the last clothing store in the mall before Mindy remembered something — shoes!

“Oh my god Lynn! I almost forgot shoes for you!” she pitched.

“Shoes?” I questioned.

“You can’t expect to wear your beat up running shoes with my dress. You need heels, come on,” she said as she pulled me by hand in the general direction of the mall center.

Mindy took me into Cathy Jeans. I knew right away this wasn’t a shoe store that catered to men or boys because there was nothing but heels and a few flat shoes.

As we walked through the door Mindy stopped and let go of my hand. She squeaked excitedly, “Yep! These are the ones!”

Mindy picked up a shoe that was nothing more than a thin piece of leather for the sole and a ridiculously high heel, or at least, I thought it was. It had tiny straps going from one side to the other, and they were pink.

A girl who appeared to be bored and not much older than us walked from behind the cash register towards us. My eyes were drawn to her jet-black hair only because she had a blond streak running all the way from her forehead to her back.

“May I help you?” she asked, with my impression that she was just hoping we would leave so she could get back to chewing her gum.

“Yes please,” Mindy said forcefully. “Do you have these in red?”

“I’ll have to check,” she said, as the disappointment of having to work showed on her face. She returned a minute later.

“We have a few sizes in red, but not many. What size are you?” she asked.

“It’s not for me, it’s for my girlfriend,” She eyed at me, “What size are you Lynn?”

“Um, I don’t know, maybe a four?” I responded. I knew I wore a size four boy’s shoe, but had no idea what woman’s size I was.

“Yeah right! Those are bigger than a four,” the sales girl responded, like I was trying to get over on her.

“Maybe you should measure her feet then,” Mindy said.

The girl brought back a shoe measuring slide while I removed my shoe.

“Put you foot in here please,” she said. After a moment of sizing against my foot she exclaimed, “Hah! Size six. I knew you weren’t a four.”

“What’s wrong with a four?” I innocently asked.

“Miss, with feet that small, you will never find anything decent to wear. My sister’s a four and she has to special order everything if she wants some nice shoes,” the attendant said as she warmed to the girls.

The girl returned several minutes later with the heels Mindy had asked for.

“Here, try these on. Slip these nylons on first too. You aren’t allowed to try shoes on without them,” the girl said as she had handed me two very small pieces of nylon that looked as though they had been removed from the bottom of panty hose.

“What are they?” I asked Mindy.

“Peds, silly,” Mindy laughed.

“First time trying on heels?” the girl asked me.

I nodded.

“How old are you?”

“I’m fourteen,” I answered.

“First real heels then?” she asked.

I nodded again.

“I remember my first time. I was with my mother and asked her where the rest of the pantyhose was,’ she laughed. “I was younger though, I think twelve.”

I pulled the peds over my feet and the girl helped me slide the heels on. She hooked the strap around my ankles and stepped back.

“What’s your name?” she asked, seemingly genuine with wanting to talk and not brush us off now.

“Lynn.”

“Lynn, I’m Toni. Those shoes look cute on your feet, but now comes the moment of truth. You’ll have to decide whether you’ll be able to wear them all night long. You’ll have to stand up and try them out walking and see for yourself. Here, I’ll help you up.”

Toni took my hand and helped upright. I felt as though I was going to fall right over on my face.

“Whoa! Take it easy girl. I’m not going to let you fall,” Toni reassured me as she helped balance me.

I finally righted myself and she let go of my hand.

“Okay, sweetie. Try walking around the store without killing yourself,” she laughed.

I took my first tentative step and almost fell over! I managed to regain my balance quickly and took step number two. I knew what to expect now, so I wasn’t as clumsy as I continued. I took two trips around the store before I sat down again. The shoes felt like heaven! They didn’t hurt, nor did they pinch my feet. I paused every time I passed the mirror. I glanced at the reflection of the princess in the mirror and smiled at her. My feet were beautiful!

“Well, how do they feel?” Mindy asked me.

Both girls were looking at me as if I was going to pronounce that we finally had world peace.

“Fine,” I responded.

“Just fine? Did they hurt?”

“No they don’t hurt at all. They felt wonderful,” I smiled.

Mindy turned to the salesgirl and pronounced, “We’ll take them.”

Toni smiled. She had her sale. Then, she smiled at me. It was one of those ‘welcome to womanhood’ smiles. I had just cleared another barrier in my deception to get Mindy and I off the hook. However, there was one small niggling thing that was bothering me. I was beginning to feel as if this was no longer a deception and Toni’s smile was a genuine welcome that made me feel proud.

I paid for the shoes and we left the store. I thought we were finished for the day, but Mindy burst my bubble by walking me into Victoria’s Secret.
 

*          *          *
 
“I almost forgot. You also need lingerie,” she exclaimed.

“What?”

Mindy pulled me into the pink and lavender store. The feminine colors almost blinded my eyes. It certainly blinded my brain.

“You need panties and a bra for next week - and hose too!” she said.

“Can’t I wear yours?” I asked.

Mindy gave me that look, which can only be described as, I just saw Sasquatch.

“You’ve got to be kidding! I don’t share my under things with anyone, it’s unsanitary! You need your own.”

That argument was settled quite easily by Mindy. I now also allowed myself to be fitted for a bra by my best friend. Actually two bras, because Mindy said I had to have a red, very sexy lace bra for the dance, and one for the few days of appearances I might be expected to make. Even the everyday one was sexy! I don’t think Victoria’s Secret knows how to make anything dull. Three thong panties, sexy of course, and two pairs of nude pantyhose, followed these. Any idea of having a college fund when I graduated from school went right out the window!

“Mindy?”

“What?”

“Why did I have to spend so much money on this stuff?”

Mindy gave me that look again.

“Lynn, you have so much to learn. Being a woman starts underneath your skin. The more feminine you feel inside, the more like a woman you’ll be on the outside. Didn’t you like your new bras?”

“Yes, I loved them,” I replied. God did I ever!

When Mindy hooked my red bra around my chest I thought I would die! She had adjusted the straps and even she couldn’t believe how sexy I looked with my forms being emphasized and accentuated! They were held high and pushed together just enough to give the illusion of cleavage. The feel of the red lace bra holding my breast forms, my breasts, was to die for! The other bra, although not as sexy, still left me feeling much the same as the red one did. If the truth were to be known, I couldn’t wait to try on my new panties. I just wish I didn’t have to break my bank to buy them!

“You see? You can’t get that feeling from some old frumpy bra that only costs only five dollars. Being a girl all starts in here,” she said, pointing at her head, “It’s all about feeling, appearance, and self confidence.”

Mindy started gathered our bags. “Let’s hurry back to my house so we can practice a little bit more before you have to go home.”

I thought I had been practicing all day. I was definitely aware that I was no longer walking like a boy - the whistles from a passing car of boys testified to that. I wondered what else Mindy had in store for me?
 

*          *          *
 
“My parents are still out so we can pretty much do whatever we want,” she said.

“Don’t you think I should be going?”

“And blow off an hour?”

“What can I learn in an hour?”

“Makeup! Let’s go to my room.”

I spent the next hour learning how to do my own makeup - Mindy was a driven woman. By the time she had finished my makeup lesson and helped me remove the forms, I was ready to head for home dressed as Lynn the boy.
 

*          *          *
 
Mom was home when I arrived. It was almost ten o’clock, my curfew. The porch light was still lit and it was starting to get cold in the evenings. A small cloud of steam blew from my mouth as I unlocked the front door and entered.

“Hi Mom!” I yelled.

“I’m in the kitchen Lynn,” I heard her say. “Where have you been? It’s almost ten at night, and you didn’t call to let me know where you were,” Mom admonished.

“Mindy and I went to the mall,” I replied.

“You were with Mindy again?” Mom’s face lit with a smile. “Is she your girlfriend?”

“No mom. We’re just friends.”

Well actually she really is my girlfriend, and I’m hers… well, kind of.

“Well you be careful. That’s how love starts. I don’t want you to come home and tell me that she’s pregnant.”

“MOM!” Oh my god! I can’t believe she really said that to me!

“I’m just teasing you Lynn. It’s late and you should be getting to bed.”

“Yes Mom,” I dutifully replied and kissed her on the cheek.

I walked out of the dining room and then ran to my room. I wanted to text Mindy before I went to bed. What I didn’t realize was that I was walking and running like a girl. The boy hadn’t returned! Even when I was talking to my mother, the tone of my voice was the same, but not the way that I talked! I had been talking like any other teen-aged girl in expression and wording, mimicking Mindy pretty darn well. And my mother hadn’t missed it one bit! Why she didn’t say anything then was beyond me, but my walk and run had finally broke the camel’s back.

“Lynn, just what do you think you are doing?” she asked. I could hear exasperation in her voice as she spoke. I had no idea what she was even asking me. She could see I was going to my room.

“What Mom?”

“What? Lynn you’ve been acting like a girl ever since you got home. What’s going on? Is this some new phase you’re going through?”

Omigod! Did I ever feel my face go red! I had been a girl all day and forgot that a girl didn’t live here with my mother. A boy did. Ummm…

“Uh, um, a, Mindy and I were practicing for a play that she’s in… and I… well, had to play a girl. I’m sorry Mom,” I offered as my excuse and turned to go to my room.

Oh Please! Please! Please! Walk like a boy! I thought to myself as I held my hips stiff and made sure my steps were strides and not the learned movement I had been using.

“That’s better sweetie. You shouldn’t play like that or someone might think you’re gay or something.”

“Yes Mom,” I answered sullenly. Mom if only you knew why I walk like that, you’d kill me!

I closed the door to my room and plopped on my bed. I was too excited to text Mindy. All I could think about was the fun that we had had shopping like two girlfriends!

I fell asleep without getting undressed or even under the covers. Not only was the day that fun, it wore me completely out! And dreaming wasn’t far away. You know how you get when you’re overtired? Instant deep sleep? Anyway, back to the dream. I was on the bus again, but Mindy wasn’t there. I wasn’t self-conscious because I really was a girl. Dan was there too, except he was sitting next to me. We were holding hands. I wondered why I was holding his hand but I didn’t pull it away??? He turned and kissed me. Crap! He kissed me! And it wasn’t one of those kisses your mother gives you either! It was a real kiss! I couldn’t move! My senses were in confusion! I had let go of his hand and both of his hands were now around my neck pulling me to him! Stars flooded my vision inside my dream and my emotions went from turmoil to some sense of clarity of feeling right! The security of being held, his soft gentle lips upon mine... pressing the two of us together. The kiss! The kiss… ohhhhhhhhh it lasted forever! I was in love! I felt it! Omigosh it felt so great and wonderful! It permeated my entire being!

My eyes flew open as I shot straight up in my bed wide awake. Oh my freaking god! I’m gay!!!

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised)   Part 3 By Arecee   Edited by Holly Hart & Sephrena Miller

“Umm, could I have your number too?” he asked timidly.

Wow! Rex actually wants my number! This was delicious! Yeah…well… hmmm. I began to ponder whether that was such a good idea or not. I could just imagine my mother answering the phone and being asked to speak to her daughter. No, that was not going to work! I knew in my heart that it would be best if this little charade ended now. It was fun, but seriously dangerous! It was my first kiss, but that was beside the point. I had to be strong!

Rex took that moment of indecision and decided to kiss me again, gently with some rippling of his tongue along my lips. I was stuffing my number into his pocket while he was still kissing me.

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
Horror! Oh my god! Oh my god! It was so real!

A bead of sweat trickled down my nose and slowly made its way onto my cheek. I was breathing heavily as my heart hurt, beating loudly inside me. Desperate for air, I got on my knees in bed and slid my window all the way open. The cool clean night air flowed in and hit my nose. I started to slow my breathing down as I got a hold of my senses.

I’m Gay! I actually dreamed of Danny: being held by him, being kissed by him!, and… enjoying it! Maybe I am not a girl after all? Wow! This was not something I had anticipated. Finding out that I enjoyed being with another boy just shook me to my core. Forget Mindy trying to make me into a girl… being gay was infinitely worse! Ugggh!

I looked up into the moonlight sky and stared at nothing in particular. The panorama of the halo around the moon and the deep darkness of the sky pierced by dots of stars held my gaze. I sighed. The sad thing about all of this is that it felt so right to me. I found nothing repulsive about being with Danny or being loved by him — even though it was just a dream. It actually excited me in a way I could not yet fully describe; it held me in awe, was thrilling, and gave me goosebumps all over my skin! Even worse, I’m finding myself craving to experience more of this!Yeah, even my body confirms it! It told me something about myself I didn’t know before.

The stigma of being gay and being seen publicly is a lot worse than my dressing up and pretending to be a girl. Pain, Pain, and more pain! I could just see myself being beaten and pounded by other boys just for being me. The girls would give me that awful sneer of being a freak. And then Mom. Oh… Mom!

How could I tell her that her own son is… gay?

I’m only fourteen and already my life is ruined! Really, how could things get much worse? The pillar of everything I had once believed myself to be is no longer there. I once thought I was a regular boy. Dissatisfied? Yes! But then Mindy got me mixed up into this Homecoming Princess prank and kept telling me how much of a girl I was. Now… this dream of Danny told me something else. Just what the fudge am I?

Gay boys act a lot like girls towards one another don’t they? Well, that’s what I am towards Danny isn’t it? Does that mean he is gay as well? I mean, well, I am attracted to him. Suppose if he isn’t gay? What if he isn’t gay and finds out I am and like him? Would he attack me?

Why couldn’t I dream of kissing a girl instead of Danny? Yeah… why?

I wiped a little water that was blurring my vision with my pajama sleeve. It suddenly dawned on me why. I did not feel for Mindy or other girls for that matter, like I did for Danny in my dream. To me, they were friends, and Mindy, she is like my own sister. The awful truth was staring at me right in the face.

I listened to the occasional cricket chirp in the backyard.

I need to talk to Mindy tomorrow about this. I decided that I would still go along with this prank of being a girl for the next couple of weeks and not let Mindy push me into being something I’m not. Yeah, she is headstrong when she gets her mind to it, but then again, we are great friends. I also knew that she was not trying to hurt me either.

Ugghh! I’d better try and get back to sleep.

I left the window open and slumped back down into my pillows. My mind turned back to that kiss… his warm lips touching mine… a smile creased my lips as I lay there with my eyes closed.
 

*          *          *
 
“Lllyyyyynn!”

I opened my eyes some and found the Saturday morning sun shining through my window. I paused a moment trying to remember what else I had dreamed of. I knew that I was with Danny… or was it some other boy? I couldn’t seem to remember the rest.

The sun was warming my skin. I just loved mornings like this! The air crisp morning air was all around me in my room. I rolled my head so that I stared at the ceiling and lay there soaking in the rays.

“Lynn! Honestly!” My mother stated as she scared me out of my nirvana. “Mindy is on the telephone for you.”

I looked at the clock on my nightstand. It wasn’t even nine yet.

“I’m sorry Mommy! I’ve just been daydreaming.”

My mom was standing in my doorway and giving me a weird look. Uh oh! What did I do wrong?

“What’s with this Mommy stuff? You haven’t called me that in years. It’s always been — Mom.”

Ooops!

I quickly thought up my response and said, “Well, It’s such a nice morning and it’s made me want to be especially nice to everyone today. Is it wrong for me to want to be nice?” I gave Mom my best bambi eyes.

My mom sort of gave me that all knowing grin and added, “Mindy is still on the phone dear.”

Fudge! I flipped the comforter off of me and scrambled out of bed and down the hallway to the kitchen.

My mother rolled her eyes as she had watched me scamper like a girl with my hair flying around me and muttered, “Lynn! Some days! Just when you think you get to know them and then they go bend the rules to keep you on your toes!”
 

*          *          *
 
“Hello?”

“Lynn, what are you doing?”

I wrinkled my nose and said back the obvious, “I’m standing here on the phone talking to you in my PJ’s.”

“Well let’s get together! We can spend the day together,” she bubbled.

God, it was too early for this kind of energy!

“What’s gotten into you this morning?”

“It’s a beautiful day, and I want to spend it with my girlfriend. Ask your mom if we can spend the day together,” she said.

I covered the handset, “Mommmm? Mindy wants to know if I can go over to her house to work on our project?”

My mother walked into the kitchen adjusting her realtor’s handbag, “I don’t see why not. I have to leave for work now. I have an open house today,” Mom said.

“Thank you Mommy!”

I uncovered the handset and answered, “Mom says it’s okay. I’ll be over in a few minutes.”

“Take your shower before you come over, and check your legs! You might have to shave again.”

“Yes boss,” I grumbled into the phone. My mother had gone out the front door as I heard the door shut in the background.

“I’m serious Lynn!” Mindy emphasized, “You want to look your best at all times. I’ll see you in a little while. Ok?”

Mindy had hung up the phone before I even had a chance to say goodbye. She must have drunk too much coffee! She couldn’t be going a hundred miles an hour naturally.
 

*          *          *
 
I went and showered, and checked my legs just like Mindy had asked me to do. Snap! I felt the miniscule fine hairs just barely peeking through my skin. It had only been five days since I first shaved my legs and now I had to do it all over again. Thank God mom had left her razor in the shower or I’d be out of luck! I soaped my legs and cleaned the suds off, and then touched up my underarms. This training to be a girl was becoming a lot more work than I anticipated! At least I didn’t have to worry about my mother seeing her gay son in all his hairless glory.

I put on a T-shirt and jeans and ran to the bus stop. While I was running, I wondered if I was running like a girl or boy? The lines of distinction had become blurred.

When the bus arrived, I made my way to a seat in the rear. Beings how it was Saturday, there was only one other person on the bus with me. The bus pulled away from the curb and I became lost in thought as it rumbled down the city streets.

My first thought was of being caught in this whole deception. What would my mother say if she found out her son had been impersonating a girl? I’m sure all heck would break loose! Then my mind wandered to something else. Was I enjoying this little ruse too much? I thought about the blurring of gender and how easily I had crossed that line. I knew I had crossed it! But where was I really?

What I was doing now was I was starting to become the person I was supposed to be. I didn’t feel like I was a boy pretending to be a girl and yet, I am naturally a girl in personality; at least Mindy has said so how many times. Others have noticed as well. I haven’t started puberty yet — that phase in children’s lives where they start to become adults. But that shouldn’t matter - I’m still a boy, or at least I think I am, even if I am gay. After yesterday and last night, I wonder?

Wearing the clothes and being a girl was easy - too easy. The most unsettling thing though, was my reaction to boys, or I should say one boy in particular - Danny. His attention toward me yesterday should have made me sick, but it didn’t. Even in the dream, when it got… ummm… more serious, it really should have too! But I had to be honest with myself. I admit that I loved his attention. In the dream - I craved it! My confusion was whether I liked the attention of a boy as a boy or as a girl? Or was it just sexual? When I awoke last night, all I could think about was that I was gay. My experience with Danny had been nothing more than a dream, and yet, it had really been more! Mindy will know better than I what’s going on.
 

*          *          *
 
I arrived at Mindy’s and knocked on the door. Mindy greeted me with an evil smile.

“Come on in girlfriend, we have work to do!” she enthused.

“Can we talk first?” I asked.

“We can talk while you’re getting ready. That’s what girls do. It kind of kills two birds with one stone,” she giggled.

“Please Mindy! I really need to talk first,” I implored.

Mindy’s infectious smile faded as she knew I had something serious to talk about. She had concerns of her own about what we were doing but had elected not to say anything.

“Ok Lynn, what’s wrong?” she asked as she patted the bed beside her. I sat down beside her and stared at the floor.

“It’s… it’s… this girl thing. It’s scaring me Mindy! I don’t think I shouldn’t be doing this! It’s…it’s… not right,” I said, as tears filled my eyes.

I’m not much of a crier, but the tension and acceptance of my plight had finally overwhelmed me. Mindy wrapped her arms around me as I buried my head against her chest. She held me, gently rocking me. Some of my sobs actually stabbed at Mindy’s conscious and she held me even tighter — with tears filling her eyes.

“Lynn, I’m sooo sorry I got you into this stupid thing!”

I sniffled between my sobbing as my crying slowed.

“I just didn’t know the whole school would be voting for you! If I could do it over, I would have never entered you! You know you mean a lot to me. I’m so sorry I hurt you!”

“Y-y-yooou didn’t… hurt me!” I choked out muffled against her shirt.

Mindy let me lift my head up and dab the tears with some tissues she handed me.

“I… just don’t know what I am anymore!” I managed to get out as I slightly rubbed my reddened eyes, “I am just as much to blame too Min. I could have said no.”

She held my hands.

“There’s just so much more to this than I expected. I thought I would dress for the functions and be done with it. And I never really noticed the differences between boys and girls, except for, well - you know,” I said pointing at her boobs.

Mindy placed her hands on both of my shoulders and stared into my eyes. “And that’s why I was training you. Being a girl is more than just wearing some clothes. You radiate it from within, you feel it, you express it. It’s a mixture of behavior and feeling. Well, there is more, but that’s basically it. It’s like having a woman walk up to you and compliment you for being a pretty girl. That doesn’t come from makeup, but from the heart,” Mindy said.

“Lynn, let’s go ahead and stop this. I’ll call Miss Benson on-“

I interrupted her, “Min, I’m not saying I shouldn’t try this. It’s just something else is bothering me too.”

“Like what?”

“Oh, yesterday, I was a girl — a girl inside!, not a boy pretending to be one.”Mindy put her hands to her mouth in shock, “ Yes — a girl! And then last night I had a dream. I was, like, kissing Danny and then he held me close, and… and.. we made out!” I whimpered. Shame reddened my face as I cringed.

Mindy tried to stifle a laugh.

“What the snap is so funny?” I quipped. I felt heat rising in my face as I became incensed at Mindy laughing at my plight.

“Lynn! Girls have those dreams all the time.”

Omigosh! She doesn’t understand!

“But I’m not a girl! I kissed him! I’m…I’m… GAY!”

Mindy’s laugh disappeared and was replaced by her thinking expression.

“Okay tell me this then: Were you a girl or a boy in your dream?”

“A girl. I mean I felt I was a girl in the dream, just I never visualized myself.”

“Hmm, I see. So do you think Danny’s gay too?”

“I-I… don’t know.”

Mindy paused and thought how to rephrase that. “Ok, who was Danny kissing — a boy or a girl?”

“He was kissing a girl.”

“And that girl was?”

“Me.”

“Exactly!” She waved her arms and widened her eyes, “So you see? You’re not gay, but a girl falling for a boy.”

Huh? What…

“Min, but that’s just it! I’m not a girl.”

“I think we could debate that. Like it or not Lynn, you’re more of a girl than you think. It’s seems to have been a part of your personality and nature — hidden underneath your image. But given the chance, it came out on its own. And on the outside, excepting what is between your legs, and with how your hair is and how you are built, you very easily pass as a girl. Almost. That is why I was filling you in on the details and things that most girl’s already know so you wouldn’t slip up.”

“But I don’t want to be a girl,” I whined.

I knew what I had just said, but was it the truth? If I was honest with myself I knew that I was lying. I was never going to be the kind of guy I wanted to be. My wish had been to be six- two and loaded with muscles. I knew that was never gonna happen. You know heredity and all? My frame is lithe, I’m short, I’m built like most girls, and even with the just some clothes and a hint of makeup, I easily pass as one. Yeah, Mindy is right about that. But so what? I’m simply a boy.

But what about my girl thing? I really had enjoyed my previous day as a girl. And what would be so wrong with learning more about how the other half lives? There was something comforting, honest, and right about being Lynn - the girl. I only had to do this for another couple of weeks, so why not try to make the best of it?

“Lynn, no one is asking you to be a girl. I would never forgive myself if something were to happen to you. Just have a little fun with this, and, when it’s over, you can be that stud muffin you want so badly want to be,” Mindy giggled.

I just slightly grimaced. “You know that won’t be happening. If I face the truth, the truth is, I’m always going to be,” I waved my arms from my head to my legs, “like this - small.”

“But still a boy,” Mindy cheered.

I smiled just a little bit.

“Okay, let’s attach your forms. So lay back on the bed.”

I did as she instructed and soon felt the cold blobs, which were my breasts, warm up against my chest. It’s amazing what just a few drops of that adhesive could do for a person’s ego! I held the breast forms with my hands for support as I stood next to the bed looking down at them.

“Feeling yourself up Lynn?” Mindy giggled.

She just did not say what I think she just did — did she? Sigh. She did. Grrr! I felt my face go red. I hadn’t even seen another girl’s breasts and here Mindy was making fun of me because my hands were on my own — even if they were fake.

“Stop it Mindy. These things are heavy. They were a little uncomfortable yesterday after all of our shopping,” I whined.

Mindy smirked, “Guess what Lynn? We girl’s have to put up with them everyday. Don’t be such a wuss.”

“Can I at least have one of my bras?”

Mindy went to her dresser and removed one of the sexier bras she had picked for me. It was nothing but lace, even where it was supposed to cover my nipples. Mindy wrapped it around my body and attached the clasps in the back. Not only could you see through this, but it also pushed my forms together and created cleavage that appeared very naughty. Mindy blended the seams where the forms and my skin came together with makeup. I’m not going to say it was perfect, but if you weren’t looking for the seam you wouldn’t see it.

“Very nice!” she cooed as she eyed me over critically.

Mindy gave me a pair of tan shorts and a blouse to wear. The shorts were tight and very small. They barely covered my panties. When I went to bend over, the thong would show from behind! Geez! I feel like I’m naked in this!

The blouse, if you want to call it that, was equally as small, and was tied just below my breasts and exposing more cleavage than I was comfortable with. The only thing that didn’t show was my bra. And I’m sure there was some way to do that too!
 

*          *          *
 
“Okay girl, we’re almost done! Here,” she said, and handed me a pair of cork wedge sandals.

“Mindy, isn’t this a little extreme? I mean, I feel like I’m on display for everyone.”

“Lynn, that’s right. Every girl is going to be dressed just like us and we are always on display. That’s a fact of life for a girl. It takes a lot of time to look this good.”

I just grumbled a little as I started to put on the sandals.

“Min, why do I have to wear these with the heels on them?”

“Because silly, you need practice walking in heels and these will be easy for you. They’re only an inch high. Just wait until later when you get to wear threes,” she giggled.

“All done?” Mind asked as I stood up.

“I guess so,” I breathed out.

“Good. Then let’s get you made up.”

Mindy led me to her makeup table and seated me in front of the mirror.

“You are going to need practice in doing this stuff yourself. So I’ll put it on first, clean it off, and then you try, okay?”

“Why do I have to learn this? Can’t you do it for me? It’s only for a few weeks?”

I watched Mindy’s expression change from cheerful to stern.

“Are you serious? I can’t go with you to the girl’s room everytime and make you up. Makeup is the first thing we learn when we are old enough to make ourselves look more beautiful. It really is fun and I’m sure that you are going to like doing this to yourself.”
 

*          *          *
 
It was put it on and take it off, again and again and again. We spent almost two hours practicing. Mindy said I was getting pretty good at it but she still did the final makeup before we went to the mall. I looked at the finished product in the mirror. My stomach dropped. I felt a shiver go through me!

“Mindy, no! I can’t go out like this!” I quietly shushed.

”What do you mean? Of course you can.”

“But I look so… so…” my words drifted away.

“So much older? Yes, you do look a little older. But what you can’t cover up Lynn, is beauty. That’s something that comes naturally. And guess what? You are naturally endowed with lots of it. I seriously don’t know how in the world I had failed to see this on you after all these years we have known each other! Even I’m shocked! Just try not to think about it, be yourself, and enjoy the day we are going to have at the mall.”

I blinked a couple of times. Even I’m having trouble believing that I really do look so much like a girl! I mean, just a tiny bit of makeup, a dab here and there, and presto! This amazing looking girl stares back at me in the mirror! And that girl — is me!

Mindy tugged on my arm and slowly pulled me up off of her stool, breaking the spell I was under.
 

*          *          *
 
We rode the bus to the mall. Luckily, there weren’t any boys on board to make nasty comments towards me.

We started our adventure at the nearest store to the mall entrance we walked in through and continued on to each one as we came to them. We had just finished with our third store, a boutique specializing in young women’s fashion, when, as we exited the store, Mindy stopped and let out a shriek.

“Oh my God! Oh my God! It’s Charlie. Come on!” Mindy excitedly impressed. She then proceeded to pull me across the mall by my hand.

“Mindy, what the fudge are you doing?” I asked, trying to keep up, “And who’s Charlie?”

Mindy was grinning as we hurried, “Only the most gorgeous boy I met the last time that I was here!”

Mindy smiled as her head bobbed up and down as we made it past some people through the food court, “I didn’t give him my phone number and I thought I’d never see him again!”

Hmm…

“But what about ME?” I nervously asked, pointing at my obviously sexy clothes.

“Charlie has a friend with him,” she smiled, “this will be perfect!”

Omigosh! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo…

“Just perfect, Mindy. Are you out of your mind? Have you forgotten that I’m a boy? You just went all over me yesterday because of how I was with Danny. NOW, you are going to put me back into that SAME situation??!”

“Yep!”

“You are seriously Cr-”

“Hiiii Charlie!” Mindy cooed.

We had reached the object of her dreams.

“Oh hey! Hi Mindy. What are you doing here?” the boy who obviously had to be Charlie replied.

“My best friend forever in the whole world and I came out to shop,” Mindy proudly introduced me. I started to blush a crimson shade and shied away from looking directly at Charlie. “Charlie this is Lynn. She’s the Homecoming Princess for our class this year.”

“Hi Lynn. Mindy sure has some beautiful friends. It’s a real pleasure to meet you,” he smoothly praised me as he extended his hand to shake mine. He continued, “Mindy, Lynn, this goofus beside me that hasn’t stopped staring at Lynn is my friend Rex.”

I nervously extended my hand and felt Charlie’s strong grasp as he gently shook my hand.

“Hi,” Rex said, blushing at Charlie’s remark about me. I looked over at him and saw that he was as nervous as I. Ummm, does that mean he likes me?

“You’re really the Homecoming Princess?” Charlie asked.

“Yes. I’m afraid so. I thought everyone at school knew about it?”

“Oh, well we don’t go to your school. We go to Saint Ingrid’s.”

Now I really felt like an idiot. How could I be so dumb? Hello Lynn? There is a larger world out there!

“I’m sorry, I just thought____.”

“Ah don’t worry about it. Hey, would you mind much if Rex and I hung out with you girls for the afternoon?”

“Of course you can!” Mindy answered before I had a chance to move my lips.

I widened my eyes in terror. I wanted to run, run far away from this situation as possible! I gave her one of those ‘What the fudge are you thinking?’ looks, but all she did was smile at me and grabbed Charlie’s arm.

I stood there watching them talking about anything and everything as they began walking slowly along the store fronts down this mall wing.

“Umm… I guess it’s you and me? I mean… that is..” Rex startled me out of my daymare, with some hesitation.

Oh freakin’ JOY! I’m going to spend the entire afternoon pretending to be a girl and try not to be discovered and I have to be in close proximity to a BOY the entire time! Is there really a God? Rex seemed to be very shy, which could be good. That way, I won’t have to talk too much! Rex is cute though. Snap! Did I just think that? Cute?

The four of us walked through the mall together in pairs and much to my surprise Rex wasn’t as shy as I initially thought! In fact, he had me laughing almost the entire time we were together with his witty humor. I learned that he and Charlie were on the football team at their school and he didn’t have a girlfriend. I found myself lowering my guard and letting go. Something about Rex, maybe his personality or else it was my instinct made me feel he was safe to be around. So I let go of my tenseness and began being this girl I portrayed. I knew some of my buttons were being pushed the right way when I found my fingers intertwined with Rex’s as we walked. When did he do that? I wondered. Guess I do need to pay more attention to my surroundings, huh?

“Hey, what do you all think about seeing a movie?” Charlie suggested.

“I —,”I started to say, but Mindy cut me off fast with a tap on my arm.

“Sure, we both have time,” Mindy answered, for both of us!

“MINDY!” I hissed, “I HAVE to go to the bathroom.”

I hadn’t been a girl for very long, but I knew that’s the signal between girls for when they needed to talk!

Mindy sighed and looked at my face. Seeing how serious I was, she relented.

“We’ll be right back,” Mindy said, as she followed me into the ladies’ room.

“What?” she asked.

“What??! Mindy we’re going to the movies with them!” I said incredulously.

Mindy just looked at me cluelessly like ‘Why am I making a fuss? Did I do something wrong?’

“Am I missing something here?”

I frowned and furiously said, “Mindy! When a boy brings a girl to the movies, it’s not to watch the film! IT’S TO MAKE OUT!”

“Yes, so?”

“MINDY! I-AM-NOT-A-GIRL!”

“It sure looked like it earlier when you were holding hands with your man,” Mindy giggled.

Omigod! Is she a total ditz on me now? How could she do this to me??! She promised not to hurt me! Now she is endangering my life! I’m probably going to be spending the entire night in the ER in agony!

“Mindy, This isn’t funny!” I felt tears welling up and blurring my vision. I was angry! “What the heck do you think Rex is going to do to me when he finds out about me? Huh?!!! Do you even care about me at all?”

“God Lynn, Chill!” Mindy walked over and hugged me. I sobbed just a little and let a few tears drip on her shoulder. I gripped her tightly. “He’s not going to find out! Not unless you tell him, or let him. Please… I don’t want to get kicked out of the theater because you couldn’t keep from mating with him either.”

I pushed apart from her, still beet red from my anger, and wet eyed and we both suddenly started cracking up, laughing, at that crude remark towards me. God Min… Why? Why? Why?... Just don’t let me get hurt… Please?

“Eeewwwwwwwwwwwwww,” I exclaimed. Then I bumped my hip against Mindy’s and chimed, “Bumpa! Bumpa Bumpa!”

After a few minutes and our laughter had died out, Mindy managed to say with tear streaked eyes, “We need to repair our makeup. That’s where the skills I was teaching you will come in handy. That is, unless, you want to go for the Goth look?”

“No,” I meekly said. I sat my purse on the sink counter and we both broke out our war paint.
 

*          *          *
 
We rejoined the guys and were soon seated in the back row of the theater.

“We’re going to get some popcorn and drinks ladies. What would you like?” Charlie asked like a true gentleman.

“Um, Sprite,” Mindy answered.

“Coke, please?” I seconded.

The guys left for the refreshments and I was still uneasy about this whole thing. I folded my arms across my chest.

“Mindy, what should I do if Rex tries to kiss me?”

“That’s up to you. If you don’t want to kiss him, turn away. But if you want it, just go for it.”

Fat lot of help she was!

“But you know it wouldn’t be right if he kissed me! I’m a boy!”

“If you say that one more time Lynn Collins, I’m going to scream!” she exasperatedly retorted. “You’re the girliest girl I know and the prettiest too! You don’t know how lucky you are! You’re beautiful, you’re nice, and you’re funny. If I was a guy, I’d want to date you! The only reason Charlie isn’t all over you is because I met him first! Everything we’re doing together is teaching you more about being a girl. Relax. Have fun! And, if Rex kisses you… then lucky you!!”

So either I’m a girl or I’m gay. Not a lot to choose from is there? Fine! I thought. One way or the other I’ll know for sure after this movie…IF I get to live through it!!!
 

*          *          *
 
The guys soon came back with our movie munchies and settled in beside us.

The film had started and my thoughts drifted off to what Mindy had said. Am I really a girly girl? I didn’t think I was… I glanced down at my clean shaved legs with the wedge sandals at the end. Nope! No boy there! My exposed stomach above my shorts pretty much agreed with what Mindy said to. Mindy always kept going on how naturally I was girl in behavior and yet I didn’t see how. That is how I have always been as a boy. If I really was a girl, how come I don’t feel like I am? Maybe I was a girl and just didn’t know it yet. Maybe Mindy was right. I don’t know… I guess I’ll have to drown out my thoughts with the warm buttered popcorn Rex kept offering to me.

Hmmmm… buttered popcorn! Rex’s fingers with butter… I absentmindedly imagined myself licking the butter from his fingers. Snap!

We finished the tub of popcorn between the four of us not even a third of the way through the film. As the feature continued, I began to feel chilled. The theater was kept at a comfortable temperature, if you were wearing clothes that covered most of your body! As I described before, what I was wearing only made itbarely legal to walk around outside and not be arrested! I thought if I moved closer to Rex I might feel some heat from him. After all, he was smart enough to wear something warm.

As I leaned over towards him, he put his arm around my shoulders. Mmmmm! This feels really good!He was toasty warm and it felt really good leaning into him besides! So, I did what any red blooded boy would do! I cuddled as close to him as I could get!

I don’t remember what happened next - well actually I do, but not what caused it. For some reason, I turned towards Rex to say something about the movie when - he kissed me right on the lips! My eyes sprung wide open! Eww! Eww! How could he? Ewwwwww! He’s a boy!!!!! I wanted to push him away and hurl all that popcorn we ate right into his lap! I wanted his warm, soft and inviting lips to go away from mine! I wanted the stars that I had felt explode inside my head, just like from my dream, out from being inside my head right now! I wanted this warm gushy feeling coursing throughout my body to JUST STOP!!! I wanted… I wanted… FUDGE WITH IT! I wanted more!

This was my first kiss from anyone other than my mother! Well, this one was way different from the ones Mom gave me. This one was planted directly onto my lips, inside my mouth and… omigosh! It was so much better!!! I felt a warm glow permeate my insides and bathe me in its radiance as the kiss continued. I was barely registering Rex’s tongue squirming around inside my mouth as he sucked on my lips. It was almost as if he wanted to suck me clear inside him! But it felt good! I was starting to lose consciousness from the warm loving glow radiating throughout my entire being and stars and light filling the inside of my mind. My ears were ringing. I let go! Forget being gay!!! I was a girl!

Rex broke the kiss and looked at me. “Lynn?”

I could feel myself being shaken and I was blinking my eyes but the intense light and stars and spots inside my head blinded my vision. I couldn’t see! It dawned on me our mouths were no longer connected. I didn’t feel it. I couldn’t feel my lips either! It’s like they were rubber!

“Uggga bghhh,” was all I could manage to say as the glow and light faded and the spots stopped swirling in my vision. I could see Rex staring into my face. The ringing in my ears finally left.

“Wow!!!” he exclaimed. “Lynn, are you all right?”

“Ugh huh,” I agreed, using my words wisely. My lips still weren’t working right!

“You kiss awesomely!”

I wanted to say that he had been my first! I also wanted to say that ‘yeah, that kiss shook me to my core and rocked my world!!!’ But what I wound up doing was planting my rubbery lips back onto his, and then slowly along his neck in small puckering kisses…
 

*          *          *
 
By the time the movie was over, my lipstick had completely vanished. Rex was wearing it very nicely!

This was one great experience for me. I have never felt so good as I did here and now.

Mindy tapped me on my arm to get my attention. “Will you please excuse us Charlie, Rex? We have to go to the bathroom.”

I didn’t respond, but I didn’t have to. She had a death grip on my hand as she pulled me along into the Ladies room.

As soon as the door closed, Mindy was all in my face!

“Just what did you think you were doing in there?!!” she yelled. She was obviously pissed. In fact, Mindy almost never yelled at all. It sort of scared me some.

“What are you talking about?” I innocently replied.

“You know very well what I’m talking about Lynn Collins! You and Rex… playing tonsil tag and feeling each other up throughout the entire movie!” she spat.

A toilet flushing interrupted us, and a girl I recognized as being a senior from our school exited a stall.

“Hi Lynn. Congratulations! I voted for you,” she smiled at me and then washed her hands. She was lingering around some touching up her makeup much slower than was necessary. She had heard Mindy scolding me and was dying to hear the rest of the conversation. Now I knew how girls spread gossip so quickly! They found it in the original chat room!

Mindy and I waited until the girl left and looked through the stalls to be sure no one else was going to hear what we were going to talk about.

“Okay, do you want to explain to me just what the heck you were doing?” Mindy demanded.

Well, I was incensed! I did not feel I owed her any explaining at all! She had practically pushed me into this prank and kept saying how I should experience things from a girl’s point of view. Well lemme tell you Mindy, I did! And I loved it! But I’m not telling you yet!

I maintained a straight face and replied, “We were just kissing.” Well, that’s technically true! We did! It’s just we did a little bit more as well…

“Just kissing? When I told you to go ahead and kiss a boy if you wanted to, I didn’t mean for it to be for the entire movie! You’re walking on thin ice, Lynn!! This whole thing is to make you feel and act like a girl, not to actually become one!” Mindy scolded.

Too late girlfriend!!! I already crossed over umpteen kisses ago!

“Mindy, when we kissed I felt like I was girl. I think I know what it feels like now. Oh Mindy… the kissing… it was wonderful!” I said, as my excitement of the kisses continued.

Mindy shook her head and then a smile crept across her lips. “So, do you still think that you're gay?”

I pursed my lips and thought for a moment. “You know, I’m still not sure! I think I need to do some more kissing to find out for sure.”

Mindy rolled her eyes.

“He is definitely cute!” I dreamily said.

“Oh-my-God Lynn! You really have become a girl, haven’t you?!!!” Mindy was eyeing me in shock.

I already knew I was a girl. I also believed now I had always been too. I think at least mentally I had been and had been acting girlishly all along. It’s just that people (myself included) had managed to fail to connect my behavior and my looks until now. Until Mindy that is. But I couldn’t tell her - not yet. I already knew how she felt responsible towards me and that news would crush her!

“No, Min. I still the same old me,” I stated matter-of-factly, grinning. I was trying to cop this off like one of my pranks.

“Thank God Lynn! You were really scaring me there for a moment. There is no need to go hog wild and get me this upset for a joke! Now let’s get back to the boys. And no more make-out sessions!” she scolded me.

“Yes Mommy. I’ll be good.”

Mindy slapped my arm and we both giggled.
 

*          *          *
 
We returned to the boys out in the lobby to say goodbye and thank them for a great afternoon. The afternoon had really gone on longer than Mindy and I realized and we both knew that her mother was going to have a fit.

“Thank you so much Charlie for this fun afternoon. I really enjoyed it! But we do have to be going,” Mindy said as she gently took Charlie’s hands in her. I watched that move and stored it away for future reference!

“That’s Cool. The pleasure was mine. Oh, hey-Mindy…before I forget like last time, may I have your phone number? Please?”

Mindy had that boy hooked: pole-line-and sinker!

“Sure!” Mindy replied and wrote her number on a small piece of paper and then handed it to him.

Rex turned toward me, and a small smile crept across his face.

“Umm, could I have your number too?” he asked timidly.

Wow! Rex actually wants my number! This was delicious! Yeah…well… hmmm. I began to ponder whether that was such a good idea or not. I could just imagine my mother answering the phone and being asked to speak to her daughter. No, that was not going to work! I knew in my heart that it would be best if this little charade ended now. It was fun, but seriously dangerous! It was my first kiss, but that was beside the point. I had to be strong!

Rex took that moment of indecision and decided to kiss me again, gently with some rippling of his tongue along my lips. I was stuffing my number into his pocket while he was still kissing me.
 

*          *          *
 
The bus ride back to Mindy’s was filled with our conversation and excitement of the day. Mindy might have scolded me for my behavior, but hers wasn’t much better! She even admitted to touching tongues! Ewwwwwww — unless it was Rex’s!

Mindy’s mom was waiting on the porch when we reached her house.

“Mindy,” she sternly spoke, “What kind of hour is this to be coming home? You know all I ask is for a call! Who’s this?” she asked when she noticed me standing next to Mindy.

“Oh, this is Lyn-da. She’s new at school and I was helping her to meet new friends,” Mindy explained.

I was still waiting for the needle to drop. Mindy’s mom has seen me for years and knew me like her own daughter. Yet, here I was, standing right in front of her, albeit dressed as a girl, in the fading sunset on her lawn, and yet, she doesn’t recognize me. Wow! Simply wow!

“That’s still no excuse for coming home late. I’m sure Linda’s mother must be worrying where she is too.”

“Her mom’s still at work, so she won’t be in trouble.”

Mindy's mother replied, “But you will be young lady if you do this again. Well go upstairs and change, dinner’s almost ready. And have Linda call her mom to let her know she is on the way home now”

Mindy dragged me to her room where she helped me change back to being a boy again.

“I still can’t believe your mom didn’t recognize me. I was trying to think up what excuse to use for that. Thank God I didn’t have to.” I said.

“I told you no one would, now do you believe me? You’re just too beautiful! I’ll bet your own mother wouldn’t recognize you.”

“Likely chance,” I snorted. I knew my Mom would somehow know it was me. I just knew. My mom has this Mom-radar sense and knows everything I do and where I go!

As I slipped my T-shirt back on, I proceeded to look in Mindy’s mirror and remove all traces of the makeup.

“I had so much fun today. Mindy, what do you think of Rex?”

“He’s cute, maybe cuter than Charlie. You two looked so nice together.”

“You’re still not mad at me for kissing him are you?” I questioned as I started to tie my ponytail back down.

“Of course not! You’re my best friend.”

“Good. I don’t want anything to come between us.”

We both hugged one another and I said my goodbye. I snuck down the stairs, carefully checking to see if Mindy’s mom was in viewing distance of the lower stairs and the front door. Good! She wasn’t! I opened the front door.

“Thank you Mrs. Swanson, It was nice meeting you,” I slightly yelled.

“Walk home safely!” I heard her from the living room. I closed the door fast and dashed down the sidewalk zigzagging through the yards just in case Mindy’s mother tried to see me.
 

*          *          *
 
I walked home and try as I may, I couldn’t make that damned sway leave my hips! I would walk two or three steps like a boy, but then my walking resumed going right back to being a girl. It was everything I could do to make it in my house without giving myself away.

“Hi baby! Did you and Mindy finish your project?” she asked.

Mom was giving me another weird look. Oh no! She knows! Not the ‘You’re in big trouble’ look. It was more like the ‘I Know what you did’ look. Fudge!!!!!!

I hadn’t so much as twitched my hips, so I knew it wasn’t that. She just stared at me. I was starting to sweat. I knew I was careful in removing my makeup - so that couldn’t be the problem either. Oh my God — she really knows! She knows her little girl had made out with a boy!!!!

“Um, yes. Is there something wrong?” I squeaked as my strength of will was slowly dissipating under Mom’s intense gaze.

“No dear. There seems to be something different about you but I just can’t to seem to put my finger on it. You seem like a different person. Maybe it’s the curl on your ponytail?”

“Oh that!” I broke a sweat and quickly came up with, “Mindy was just playing around with her new curling iron on me.”

“Okay, but it’s not just that. It seems to me like you have a glow about you.”

“A glow?”

“You remind me of when I was young and had found the latest love of my life. There’s just some sort of glow a young woman gets when she’s in love.”

Oh gosh! I have to get her off of my trail!

“Mom, I’m not a girl.”I spoke more quietly, showing a sadness, “And I’m not in love. I’ll go to my room now. Ok?”

My mom released the tension she had shown a moment before and ruffled my hair.

“Ok sweety."
 

*          *          *
 
I made it to my room and shut the door. I just couldn’t believe how observant my mother was!!! I was just about busted! All I had missed was a tiny curl and she almost found out about Rex! I hope this thing is over soon! I really hate making up excuses, especially to my mother. I love her too much to lie to her. And I hated these excuses so much… This needs to stop before I make any more mistakes.

I was lost in thought and was brought back to reality by the ringing of the telephone. Snap! If mom answers it… and it’s Rex… I’m soooo dead!

I opened my door and hollered, “I’ll get it Mom!” I rushed like a scared rabbit and just grabbed the receiver on the 5th ring.

“Hello?”

“Hi Lynn! It’s me, Rex, from this afternoon?”
 

*          *          *
 
Oh God! Oh God! It was Rex!! My stomach was doing flip-flops as I thought about our making out in the theater earlier.

“Hi Rex, “I purred in my most girlish sexy voice, “I was just thinking about you!”

Fortunately, our phone was wireless so I dashed back to my room with it. I didn’t see my mother looking at me as I had run back. I missed seeing the most quizzical look on her face.

I leaped onto my bed and grabbed my pillow and hugged it to my chest as I was laying down on my stomach on the bed, rocking and banging my legs back and forth up in the air. I was definitely going to have to get a Teddy Bear soon, but the pillow would have to do for now!

“I was thinking about you too. I had a lot of fun today,” he said. I could almost feel his smile through the handset.

“Mmm, mmm. Me too,” I answered dreamily and hugged the pillow tighter.

“When can I see you again?”

That was definitely a good question! I’d like to know that answer too! This was getting very complicated. I wanted to see Rex again, but I seriously doubted that my mother would allow her son to date the hunk on the other end of this phone!

“I don’t know Rex. My mother says I’m too young to date,” I answered. My sadness showed itself plainly in my voice.

“Maybe if I talk to her, she might let you go out with me?” he suggested.

Snap! That’s just all that I would need! Mom, my boyfriend Rex wants to talk to you about dating me I thought as a shiver went down my spine.

“I don’t think that would be a very good idea right now Rex. If she knew I had been to the movies with you, I’d be grounded until next year!”

“Oh, okay. Maybe we can meet at the mall again sometime?” he asked hopefully.

“I’d like that. Call me again in a couple of weeks and we’ll arrange it.” I answered.

“Lllyyynn! It’s late! Tell whoever it is on the phone you’ll have to call them tomorrow,” my mother shouted.

“I have to go,” I urgently said.

“Yeah, I heard. See you soon?”

“Call me tomorrow,” I found my mouth saying. I think my brain was actually trying to get me killed!

“I will. Good night.” Rex said. After a click, the line went dead.
 

*          *          *
 
In a daze, I made my way back downstairs to get a Coke from the fridge.

“Who was that?” Mom asked.

“Just a friend from school,” I replied.

“Well, please tell your friends not to call so late,” Mom admonished.

“Yes Ma’m.”

I walked back upstairs with Rex on my mind and a coke in my hand. Unfortunately, he was having an incredible effect on me that I didn’t expect. He solidified me into Lynn the girl and my walk proved it! It’s amazing at what just what one kiss can do! My hips were swaying some and my arms were turned up and out. My clothes may have been a boy’s, but the girl wearing them was showing that clothes didn’t make the girl, the girl inside did!

“Lynn, what in the world are you doing? I asked you before to not walk that way, you almost act like a girl. I hope you don’t do that at school,” Mom said in disgust.

I felt my face immediately go red with shame and fear gripped me. I had been living as Lynn the girl so much during the last few days that I had become unconsciously her in every move and action. Trying to act like a boy was starting to look like it was going to be really hard work! Even more disturbing was that Rex had made me act this way! How could I explain that to my mother - ‘I’m sorry mom, I was thinking about my dreamy boyfriend and it just happened, I hope you don’t mind?’ I was definitely going to have to be more careful or this whole Princess thing was going to blow up in my face!

I turned around and gave a devilish grin “Gotcha!” I half-heartedly laughed hoping that she would think I was pulling her leg.

“You and your pranks. Someday you’re going to get in over your head and you’ll be sorry you ever started pranking people.”

Somehow, I sensed Mom was not buying this, but she had no proof otherwise to nail me yet. Whew!

“I’m sorry Mommy. I’m going to go to bed now. Good night.”

“Goodnight sweetheart.”

Mommy, if you only knew what a simple prank has already done to me right now.

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised)   Part 4 By Arecee   Edited by Holly Hart & Sephrena Miller

“Miss Benson was gushing about how pretty her freshman Princess was. I almost fell asleep it was so boring. I wanted out of there! I had a piece of wood I wanted to turn on the lathe and this Princess crap was taking time away from me for doing that! I was about to leave until she announced who the pretty girl was. Do you have any idea as to who that might have been?” he asked in a tone of voice that left me shivering cold.

“Me?” I managed to get out. My throat was constricting because I knew I was in real trouble now.

“Yes.. YOU!” he looked at the poster picture and back at me again. “You know, now that I look at you and this picture, I can’t believe that I was so stupid as to believe you were a boy! You’re too damned beautiful to be one! Do you have any idea of how much trouble this school could be in, I could be in, if the parents of the students were to find out that a girl, posing as a boy on this swim team was TOPLESS at both practice and the meets?”

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
My dreaming that night had been weird! I had dreamed about my life and what it was becoming. I was never a boy in any of them: I was a girl! The feeling that I experienced within them was as if I had actually been born a girl and everything I did and experienced was second nature. No longer was there the shock or weirdness to it like with my previous dreaming. It felt peaceful, and I was really participating within them. I was playing games with Mindy, and at times helping her do chores. I actually didn’t mind the work and it was fun with Mindy there to help.

What was really, really weird was that I was happy in every one of them! I felt a serenity and happiness of being complete. I radiated an inner joy and could feel my smile affecting Mindy and helping make her happy. Occasionally, a boy happened to wander in and both Mindy and me would get all giddy and begin critiquing and expressing our thoughts about how he looked, how we felt about him and such. It was perfectly normal and nothing was amiss. Except, perhaps, for the fact that I am a boy?

 

*          *          *
 
Monday morning came and Mindy had to be at school early. Miss Benson wanted a report on Lynn’s progress and whether or not he could pull off the deception.

“Good morning Mindy. Please step into my office,” she said holding the door open for Mindy.

Mindy entered and sat down beside Miss Benson’s desk.

“Well, how is Lynn doing?” Miss Benson asked as went around her desk and sat down.

Mindy could hardly conceal her excitement.

“Lynn is so much a girl! When he gets dressed it’s like he was born a girl! It’s so creepy how easy it is for him. We went to the mall and no one even gave him a second look! Except for the boys!” Mindy giggled nervously.

“Boys?” Miss Benson raised an eyebrow, “are you telling me that boys were looking at him?”

“Yes Miss Benson. That was the only thing that freaked him out.”

“I can quite imagine that it did!” she retorted, obviously thinking.

Mindy fidgeted with her hands and looked back up to Miss Benson.

“What is it child?”

“Miss Benson, are we doing the right thing with Lynn? What if something goes wrong?”

“As long as you both are careful, Lynn will be fine. The only ones that will know are just us three.”

“That’s not what I mean, Miss Benson. What if he’s different after this is all over? I worry that we might damage him.”

“Well there is that! I will have to call you and him in here together in a few days to discuss — the fallout.”

“Fallout? Miss Benson, I don’t understand?”

“Yes. Meaning after the Homecoming. Lynn isn’t just going to go around school pretending to be a girl is he?”

Mindy suddenly gleamed at what Miss Benson was saying. “He doesn’t want that.”

“Exactly. We need to discuss what we are going to have to do for Lynn after the Homecoming is over. We will need a plan and may have to bring Mrs. Collins in on it later.”

Mindy gulped realizing the implications. “It’s Ms. Collins Miss Benson. Lynn’s father left her and Lynn not too long after Lynn was born.”

Miss Benson chewed on that a minute. “Well that could explain some things then. Men! Sometimes I wonder how the human race has survived this long? Men just don’t think! Family is important and a child’s upbringing is equally as important. At least Lynn shows a lot more responsibility than his father did.”

“Oh, I almost forgot. This Wednesday is the luncheon for the Cancer society and it’s the first function Lynn has to attend. I want her to dress nicely. A skirt down to the knees, not one of those things most of you girls wear these days. I’d like her to wear a blouse and a cardigan sweater over it. She’ll need heels, but not too tall — and please make it something dressy. I’ll leave the rest of the details to you Mindy.” Miss Benson finished.

“Miss Benson? Lynn has tiny feet and my shoes are a size too large for him. Could we have a little money to buy the heels, please?” Mindy begged.

Miss Benson paused for a moment, staring at Mindy. This prank was getting out of control and expensive to boot.

“Here,” she said and handing Mindy twenty dollars. “Go some place cheap.”

“Thank you Miss Benson,” Mindy smiled as she left the principal’s office.
 

*          *          *
 
I had been getting compliments all day from various girls and boys for winning the Homecoming Princess title. In Advanced Math class, one girl in particular just had to ask me the question.

“Lynn,” Carla whispered,” You are so beautiful! Why do you… dress down like that? It doesn’t make sense to hide your beauty.”

Yikes! How do I answer that one?

I pulled my hair back over my shoulder and leaned closer to Carla. “Well… I’m not quite ready for dating. I have, well, sorta been hiding and trying to stay unnoticed. I know there is a lot involved with trying to be with someone and there is a lot of stress involved and mentally… I’m just not ready.”Ain’t that the truth! But then there’s Rex…

Carla stared at me. “Well, that takes a lot of courage to do! I actually admire your courage. Dating can be a real pain. But you don’t have to dress... well, like a boy.”

“I’m sorta doing two things at once Carla. I’m avoiding dating for now and trying to prove a point.” Come on brain! Think of something! What am I trying to prove? Hmmm.. oh yeah!

I continued, “A girl can do anything a boy can do. I figure… maybe… I might be taken more seriously, well, if I am sort of dressed like one. I do like to joke and be like one of the guys without being looked at, you know?”

Carla accepted that. “Yeah, there are times when I feel like they are looking only at my body and not at me. It’s kind of a weird feeling.”

“Uh huh. So that’s where I am. I’m not rocking the boat, I am trying not to stand out too much, well except for the Homecoming Princess contest, and I want to be treated just like any other guy.”

Carla giggled. “Wait until you meet the right boy.”

Oh no! I’m not going there! I just met a boy and I know what it’s like! Mmm hmm! I didn’t lie, I’m not ready yet. I’m not exactly telling the truth, and I’m not offering anything to expose me either. This was making me nervous. Uggh!

“Miss Realles, Miss Collins? Pay attention in class please!” Mrs. Hotchkins admonished.

My face showered in a blush. Oh God! I was embarrassed to the max!

“Yes Mrs. Hotchkins. I’m sorry,” I meekly apologized.

Carla spoke as well, “I’m sorry too Mrs. Hotchkins.”

Satisfied, Mrs. Hotchkins turned back to the chalkboard and began droning on, “Now for this quadratic equation, we have the…” I stayed quiet for the rest of math period. Math is really fun! Not!
 

*          *          *
 
It was 6^th period, last period of the day, and I was at water polo practice. I had been absent a week because of my preparing for the Homecoming Gala and the secretary at the School Office had given me an excuse slip for those dates when I had mentioned my name and the preparation for the Homecoming Gala I had been doing for Miss Benson. But now, I’m back, and looking forward to swimming and doing something I loved doing and excelled at!

I had been treading water for twenty minutes practicing my technique when Coach Wilson yelled, “COLLINS, out of the pool, NOW!”

What the fudge is this all about? I wondered as I swam towards him at the pool edge. I was one of the best swimmers on the team and yet coach seemed to be highly irritated with me to say the least!

“What’s wrong coach?” I asked innocently as lifted myself out of the water.

“In my office now,” he growled. He slapped a long beach towel at my chest.

“Cover yourself!”

I pulled the towel around my neck to let it equally hang on either side.

“No! I mean cover yourself!” Coach ordered as he grabbed the towel, opened it up and draped it over my front. “Hold that to you and get in here!”

Woah! I’m in some sort of trouble! And why do I have to cover myself? Geez!

I followed Coach Wilson to his office. Normally, he would have walked beside me, but now, I had to almost run to keep up with him.

We entered his office and he pointed at a chair.

“Sit!” he demanded.

“What’s wrong Coach?” I asked again.

He was busy writing something as he replied, “As if you didn’t know… What in the hell were you thinking Collins?”

“About what coach?” I whined. I still didn’t have a clue as to what he was so angry about.

“About this!” He waved his arm at me and then held up in front of me a poster for the Homecoming Princess contest. The one with my picture on it! Oh Snap! “What were you thinking when you joined the boy’s water polo team?”

Oh God! Now I knew what he was so pissed about! I joined because I’m a boy, but now, by coincidence and through the interference of a prank I am assumed to be a girl. If I opened my mouth to admit the truth, I’m dead. I mean, really dead! At home and at school! Gulp! I decided to be like I had been with Carla earlier with the coach and find out what he knew. Perhaps I could salvage this.

“Don’t you think I’m a boy, coach?”

“You want the truth?” he shouted incredulously. This was not going to go well.

“Yes please.” I meekly answered.

“I did at first. Your records list you as a male too! I’m taking that issue up with Miss Benson to get it fixed. I don’t know whether it’s a glitch or if you had something to do with getting it changed to show that you were a boy, but you are off this team!”

My lip quivered as water started to blur my eyes.

“What kind of girl would show up here with her breasts exposed? Huh? Would you explain that to me Miss Collins? Would you?”

I was speechless. He fully thought I was a girl trying masquerade as a boy! Just like Mr. Copeland!

“I noticed that you were lacking in the package department though and were built a little too effeminately, but I thought ‘What the heck? He’s a freshman. Puberty will take care of that!’ Even the other boys on the team mentioned to me that they thought you were a girl and I had the gall to shove it off as teasing. I don’t follow all of the stupid girl, boy bullshit that goes on around here in school. I teach my wood shop and I coach water polo. I keep to myself because I don’t want to get involved in that crap! Well, do you know what happened this morning at the teachers meeting?”

I shook my head.

“Miss Benson was gushing about how pretty her freshman Princess was. I almost fell asleep it was so boring. I wanted out of there! I had a piece of wood I wanted to turn on the lathe and this Princess crap was taking time away from me for doing that! I was about to leave until she announced who the pretty girl was. Do you have any idea as to who that might have been?” he asked in a tone of voice that left me shivering cold.

“Me?” I managed to get out. My throat was constricting because I knew I was in real trouble now.

“Yes.. YOU!” he looked at the poster picture and back at me again. “You know, now that I look at you and this picture, I can’t believe that I was so stupid as to believe you were a boy! You’re too damned beautiful to be one! Do you have any idea of how much trouble this school could be in, I could be in, if the parents of the students were to find out that a girl, posing as a boy on this swim team was TOPLESS at both practice and the meets?”

I gulped again. Oh my god! Oh my god! No! I do know! I managed to peep out a, “No sir.”

“Before I tell you, I want to know why you did this thing?”

I was sunk! My life was absolutely over! I had to explain my behavior as to why me, a girl was on the boy’s team. I could just pull down my speedo and show him why, but that would be just as bad with Miss Benson and my being the freshman Homecoming Princess. I finally had an idea to explain myself, thanks to Carla earlier.

“Mr. Wilson, coach, I know this is going to sound really stupid, but it all started at the first of the year. As you and every other person on the team have seen, I haven’t started to develop breasts yet. My mother is like me and is, well, flat up here,” I pointed at my chest. “Anyway, I noticed my records this year said that I was a male and I wanted to do something worthwhile in my life and compete against boys. Swimming against girls is too easy for me - I wanted real competition! Haven't you ever noticed I never showered with the other boys? Huh? I never was in the locker room! If I was, they would have discovered I was a girl! I’m very good at swimming and I wanted to stand out and win the competitions for this school and prove to myself and everyone else that I can compete equally along with the boys! I promise no one will find out about me!”

The Coach stared at me. He was silent. What? He wasn't believing me?

“Pleeeeaassse! Can’t I please stay on the team?” I groveled in my most sincere girl’s voice, tears streaming down my face. “Please coach… please…”

I was really laying it on him! If coach didn’t believe me… I was finished! I could see it all now: me, Lynn Collins, 14 years old, in a jail cell with other older men who committed really bad crimes. “I’m here because I killed 6 people!”one would say. “I robbed a bank and spent most of the money I stole!” And then, me. “I’m in here for posing as a girl, topless at my school on the swim team, and winning the Homecoming Princess elections for the freshman class.”

I cried.

“Look Collins. I know you’re a great swimmer, but what you did was inexcusable! Going topless here in school will get you expelled! Probably from the entire school district! Then there are the lawsuits this school is going to face, not to mention people losing their jobs: namely myself for not having spotted you at the beginning and preventing this!, but school administration as well! We will all be fired! It’s going to be bad enough when the boys start tittering about you having showed your boobs and then having to explain that to the girls. Miss Benson is going to have to deal with this and we are going to have to somehow explain this away before the School Board finds out. ‘Why on earth would she do that?’ they’ll wonder. No, Collins. I don’t want any more of this scandal. You are off this team,” Coach stated with a finality that left nothing to the imagination.

I loved being on the team! And now that was gone! I just sobbed as he phoned the School Office.

I had just noticed that he had finished talking because he was holding a hall pass he had written.

“Miss Benson wants to see you in her office now. Go collect your things and go see her.”

I stood up, took the hall pass he handed me, and ran from his office, tears running freely down my face. To make things worse, I was clutching my towel to cover my chest as I ran off!

I grabbed my gym bag and headed to the custodian room that I always changed in. I had found that it had been kept unlocked during most of the day and that I could lock it from the inside to change. I wouldn’t need to use it anymore after this.

My hair was not combed, wet at the edges, and hanging unkempt. I looked a fright as I slowly trudged down the hallway towards the office in a state of disbelief and scared out of my wits. My days of pranking are over! This just was not worth it!
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy didn’t see me at our usual meeting spot as school let out, so she went back inside towards the office. There, she saw me coming out: clothes wrinkled, hair a disaster, and what drew her attention the most was that I had been crying and reddened face.

“Lynn? What on earth happened?” a very concerned Mindy asked as she wrapped her arms around me.

I just couldn’t talk at that moment. I was too upset and my throat didn’t work right. I motioned for Mindy to just drop it so we could ride the bus to her house. I was still in shock from what had happened in the School Office.

I leaned against Mindy and she held me as we rode the bus in the back seat. Several girls talked in the drone that was the after-school buzz on the bus. I know I saw a couple of girls looked back towards us and then went back to what they were doing. I didn’t care! I was hurt and exhausted. Mindy sat on the aisle side of our seat, so I had her as somewhat of a pillow to lay against. I was so tired...
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy stirred me from my slumber. “Come on Lynn, we’re here at my house. I’ll carry your pack for you. Come on sleepyhead.”

I followed Mindy down the aisle of the bus and stepped off behind her.

“Now tell me girl, what happened back there?” Mindy grilled me as the bus pulled away.

I started to relate what happened that day from the coach to Miss Benson. By the time we were upstairs in her bedroom, Mindy’s jaw dropped open.

“You WHAT?” Mindy couldn’t believe her ears.

“Yeah. I sort of had to go along with it Min. I had no choice! This thing is way too big to admit to now. And I and everyone else will be in huge trouble if I don’t do this!”

Mindy had a hard time believing I had agreed to go along with the only solution Miss Benson could come up with to minimize the damage that was now starting to occur from our prank. I had to attend school as a girl at least up until Christmas break. That meant I had to dress more like Mindy and not in my usual boy clothes! Miss Benson had suggested that I should have my sex changed to female on all the school paperwork for now and was very nervous about doing that too. She repeatedly questioned me if this was what I had wanted to do rather than just to stop this and confess to everyone about the prank. I admitted that her idea was better than telling the truth at this point. I was too scared. People’s livelihoods were at stake because of Mindy's and mine's prank and even more would be at stake if I did not go along with it.

The worst part though was my mother. Miss Benson said she would have to speak with her before she would change the records and that it had to be soon! Meaning in a week soon. She said she would wait until after the Homecoming Gala and the Homecoming appearance at the football game. She did not want a scandal and also saw how hurt I was by all of this and knew that the solution was also going to be part of my punishment because, one way or another, my mother was going to find out.
 

*          *          *
 
“So like what are you going to do when your mother finds out? What is at Christmas break?”

I hung my head in shame. “Miss Benson says that I can transfer to another school further away if I like and the records can be fixed so that I can attend as a boy again there. But unless I admit to the prank now, and tarnish the school’s image, and getting both of us expelled, and Miss Benson in even bigger trouble, I have to attend school as a girl to keep up with people’s misconception of me as already being a girl.”

Yep. My three weeks as a girl has now been extended to half a school year at a minimum. *groan*

“Miss Benson has worked out a deal with the coach to quiet the rumors of my having been on the water polo meet. She hasn’t said what yet, but that she would try to make it happen. My schedule has been changed too. In place of the water polo meet, I have home economics. I have to see Ms. Peters about making up all of the missed homework tomorrow too.”

“I’m just scared of my mother Min. Really scared. She had all these hopes for me and I don’t want to let her down, you know? My father let both her and me down big time. I don’t want to do the same to her! I want her proud of me.”

I lay there staring at the ceiling wondering what I was going to do…

“You know what Mindy? I have to change and change now. No more pranks. No more joking - from either of us. I’m in enough hot water as it is now. The best thing I can do is to sink into my role and accept fate.”

Mindy smirked, “Lynn, you create your own fate. Don’t just accept it! I got you into this just as much as Mr. Copeland did. I’m going to stick with you through it. You’re my girlfriend and we stick together.”

Inwardly, I groaned. Yeah, I guess we are girlfriends.

“Would it do any good to mention that perhaps there is some small part of my body that is male?”

Mindy quipped, “Nope. You used up all of those excuses over this past week. I accept that you are a boy outwardly Lynn Collins, but inside, you pull off being a girl better than most of us real girls are. You actually almost feel like one.”

“Thanks a lot, Mindy,” I said sarcastically. “This prank has turned from bad to worse and now it’s taken everything I have and I don’t want to be reminded of that.”

I then lay backwards down on her bed and rolled away from her to face the wall. I began pondering and visualizing my life as it was going to be. Ok, I’m a girl. I know it. I admit it. I have to expose it at school and hide it at home. And yet, I can’t tell anyone that I really want to be one, especially Mindy or my Mom. This was really messed up!

“Look,” Mindy tugged my arm, trying to get me to roll back over and face her. I resisted. “All that I am saying is that you are a very special boy with a talent. Ok? I don’t think any less of you, in fact, I actually envy you! You are my very best friend! What makes you different from my other friends is that you are open and honest with me. Maybe both of us hide things from others, but never between us. I promise you, I will be there for you.”

She was there for me alright. She got me into this, but, it was kind of ok in a way. It’s all because I like the person I discovered that I was supposed to be. This! A girl. And I was finding that the girl that I wanted to be was not the way that I had behaved in the past. The girl that I wanted to be was a sweet, adorable girl that could be counted on. One whom was trustworthy. One whom was reliable. And one whom was wanted for who she was. I also… wanted to be loved. I wanted everyone to love me and treat me like a person.

In a sense, what I had used as excuse earlier throughout the day was based in fact. I was trying to prove something to myself all of my life. I felt uncomfortable being a boy. I recognize that fact now. It’s why I began pranking… it was all because I didn’t know what else to do to cope with this terrible feeling of not being right. When Mindy and this Homecoming Princess prank started, it opened up the door that had been shut to me my entire life. I had finally found myself. Oh, I was terrified at first, but I couldn’t pull away! I was drawn through that doorway by an exuberant feeling, a calling, and I had no control over it. And the more I was forcibly exposed to posing as a girl, the more I found that this was truly me.

First that dream and then Rex crystallized me into accepting myself. I loved me! For the first time in my life, I loved being me and being alive! I’m very ashamed to admit to anyone right now that I’m a girl. I’d lose Mindy for starters, then, my Mom. Mom, the person I loved the most and most wanted to impress — I was scared. I’m already in enough trouble and when she finds out next Monday, I’m a goner. I mean, yeah, she has had to put up with a lot of the nonsense from me. I know it. I was trying to find my way in this life.

But how in the world was she going to put up with my wanting to be a girl?

Mom had to put up with a lot hard times after dad left us. She struggled hard and made a home life for both me and her. And yet, did I help her like I am feeling now that I should have? No. I hadn’t. I feel really awful for having put that extra burden on her. I acted up, I skipped chores, I had made life harder for Mom all the way around. And yet, I find myself loving her even that much more for having had to put up with the boy Lynn, the Lynn that was a real jerk.

I didn’t see it then, but my eyes are open now - open as I realized my life was about to end. Once she finds out about the trouble I’m in next week, I won’t have to worry about wanting to be a girl. I’ll be worrying about trying to find a new place to live! I was a real disappointment to her. She certainly wasn’t going to love me anymore. She was going to kick me out! I felt like a total failure.

“Lynn Collins!” I rolled my head over and saw that Mindy was leaning over me looking at me. “Have you been listening to what I said?”

Warm water was trickling down my cheeks and I felt awful sick. I didn’t feel like talking either. I shook my head slightly and lay my head back down and started trying to hold back the urge to hiccup as I tried to keep from crying again.

I felt movement behind me, and then a warm body press up against my back. Arms encircled my waist and I felt a head with a lot of hair rest on my neck and shoulder. Fingers from that arm finally found mine and grasped them in a gentle squeeze.

“I’m so sorry Lynn. Please… forgive me?”

I wasn’t the emotional type when I had been Lynn the boy, but geez! Ever since finding my true self, I haven’t been able to stop being emotional. In a way, I think, I was making up for all the lost time of being me. Girl’s are emotional and sometimes cry for the silliest of reasons. Well, I had many reasons to cry, and none of them were silly!

I quietly sobbed and felt Mindy’s grasp on my hand squeeze several times and she rubbed her head against my neck telling me that things were going to be ok. I don’t know how long we had lain there. My sniffles were slowing down and I felt a depressive calm saturate me. Mindy then softly spoke.

“Let’s figure this out Lynn. Miss Benson said you had dress more proper as a girl until Christmas break right? Well, you can change over here before we go to school. Leave your house earlier and come over here. I’ll leave the garage side door open for you each night so you can enter in the morning to change.”

I was listening.

“You know that cabinet in the corner beside my father’s workbench?”

I nodded.

“It has a hanging rod in it already for hanging clothes. My father doesn’t use it and has a few boxes of things inside it but enough room to hang a change of clothes on for you. Just fold your boy clothes up and place them inside your gym bag and leave it laying on end sideways. I’ll leave an empty box you can place inside to hide your bag behind when you are done.”

That seemed totally doable. “Ok.” I squeaked through a dry throat.

Mindy then clasped my hands, both of them, inside of hers. “As for your Mother next week, try not to worry too much about it Ok? For one thing, we can do nothing at all about it. And secondly, we do not know for sure just how she is going to react. I think I know your Mother some, and I think that yes, she will be very angry. But I believe that she will try to reason things out. She seems to be a lot more reasonable than my Mom at times.”

Umm yeaah… But I happen to live with my Mom, and I just know she is going to blow her stack!

“And Lynn, I’m going to be there with you at your meeting. I’m in this together with you. I’ll explain to your Mother what I did and accept whatever punishment she sees fit for me too.”

Birds of a feather… they do what? Ummmmm…. Snap! Flock together! Yeah.

“What about us studying together?” I asked rather defeatedly.

“That hasn’t changed Lynn. Well, ok. It has somewhat. We’ll grab your clothes from the garage when we get home from school and you change here. My parents aren’t back from their work until about 5 pm. That way you can be here and leave here as Lynn.”

Hmm. I guess so.

“Can you help me with my Home Ec homework too? I have a lot of catching up to do and I’m not exactly known for being house smart.”

“Sure thing. It’s no harder than what I have been showing you about being a girl already.”

Mindy pulled her arms out from around me and propped herself up on the bed with her elbow. “Oh, Lynn, this Wednesday there is that Cancer benefit luncheon. I have the clothes for you that Miss Benson wants you to wear, but you’ll have to buy another pair of heels. A dressier set.”

“Mindy,” I said sounding on the verge of giving up, “I don’t have any more money.” And that was so true! I had already spent what little I had the other day, and now she wanted me to buy heels?

“Miss Benson gave me twenty dollars for you to spend.”

I blinked. “She did?”

“Yes. I think she’s starting to feel guilty about all of this.”

“Well she left me with a rather dismal view of my immediate future before I left school,” I let out as I rolled over and leaned on my elbow facing her. “Can we find something inexpensive?”

“I like the way you said that.” Mindy grinned. “Miss Benson said cheap, but my girl creation said inexpensive. You’re learning. Nothing’s cheap when it comes to girl’s clothing. I saw the perfect shoes for you at Cathy Jeans, and they’re on sale! You’ll also have to buy another bra because the one you bought over the weekend won’t just work with the blouse and sweater.”

“How will I get the money for that?”

“Don’t worry girlfriend. I’m going to buy a couple of bras for you. It’s the least that I can do for my best friend. Especially after how I got you into this.”

Mindy was genuinely upset and really felt bad for the situation I’m in. I could hear it in her voice and the fact she was going to dip out of her savings for me to help me through this showed she cared a lot for me.

Mindy held out her hand towards me and curled her pinky some. I held my hand out closer to hers and then she slid her pinky around mine and shook.

“Friends forever?” she questioned. Her look was one of true concern and asking forgiveness. Well, I can’t stay mad at Mindy.

“Friends forever,” I confirmed, really meaning it.
 

*          *          *
 
After calling Mindy’s mother and getting her permission to go to the mall, we fixed me up as a girl and rode the bus and made it there in short time. I was somewhat disappointed that we didn’t go back to Victoria’s Secret (I truly liked a lot of the clothing in there, even if it was geared more for adult women), but I did find a really cute bra style at Target. It was lacy and, well, I just loved it! The best thing too was that it was on sale and cost a lot less than the other place! I wasn’t gonna cause Mindy to spend a whole lot on me.

The next store we visited was Cathy Jeans. Mindy was right, the pumps were really cute. I started noticing things about shoes that I never thought I would when I had been a boy. I saw little things like how low the sides were and whether or not my toes showed. An ankle strap just added to the sexiness of the shoe. And I found myself gauging how well the color and style of the shoe would go with the clothing we had already gotten for me. It was like an inner fashion sense thing. I seemed to already have it. Maybe it was always with me and I just have never used it? Or did I really use it to fashion my grunge look?

Before we realized it, it was getting late and I had to change before Mom got home. We rode back to the stop by Mindy’s house, I went with her inside and changed back into my boy clothes. Afterwards, I saw I was cutting time really close to when Mom would be back from work, so I dashed off back home.
 

*          *          *
 
I was in the bathroom starting to remove my makeup. Yep! My own makeup. Mine, not Mindy’s. I might have spent a lot more money than I wanted, but at least this was mine! I heard the sound of a key turning in the door lock of the front door and wondered who it was? Mom wasn’t supposed to be home for another half hour!

“Hi honey! I’m home,” my mother shouted.

Fudge! I just hurriedly started taking everything off. God please make the water magical and take this makeup off! But to no avail. I scrubbed and washed as panic set in.

“Honey, where are you?” Mom asked.

“I’m in the bathroom Mom,” I squealed more in my girl’s voice.

“Are you okay?” Mom asked, wondering just what I was up to in there as she set her handbag on the table.

“Ummm I’m fine Mom. How was your day?”

Oh no! What was I thinking? I never asked my Mother how her day was! To make things worse, I was talking like the girl I was trying to wash away. And I couldn’t seem to get my voice pitch back down either!

“It went well sweetheart,” She replied, more curious than ever as to what was going on with me. She walked down the hallway to the bathroom door and paused there. “Why all of a sudden an interest in my day?”

“I was thinking about things today and I realized that I haven’t, well, been quite the son you may have wanted.” I blurted out, all the while trying to remember how to remove this stuff. Think Lynn, think! Then I remembered. Mindy had put cold cream in my backpack and told me to use it, or my face would turn into a street art expo. I opened the jar and started slathering the cold white stuff all over my face. Brrrr! This stuff really is cold! Even at room temperature!

“I want to change how I have been Mother. I’m going to start helping you around here more.”

YES!~ I love you Mindy! It's covering it up! Oops! Stash that makeup kit underneath the clean towels inside the towel closet behind me! There! Slather more of this cream on to hide the makeup!

“And I did listen to what you said last night about no more pranking. I don’t think it’s my style anymore. I know I haven’t been the best son, Mother. And I want to change that.” My very sexy eyes disappeared, as did the rest of my face. Now all I had to do was to face Mom.

I felt a tapping on my shoulder.

“Ummm Hi Mom,” I tried to smile through the goop on my face as I turned to face her. Yikes! I didn’t even hear her open the door!

“Hi honey!” She sort of fake smiled. I knew those gears up inside her head were whirring on overtime! “What on earth are you doing?”

My brain sort of froze up and I was at a loss for words. Well, I have been at a loss for words for just about everything today. So, I did what you do when all else fails…

“I love you Mother.”

Mom, not quite believing what she was seeing and hearing, calmly replied, “I love you too sweetheart. But what is this you are doing?”

“Mother, I am trying to scrub my face and cleanse it. Mindy said that I should start doing it because as I mature, my face will get oily and I might get bumps.”

My mother looked at me with a critical eye. What was I going to say? Gee Mom, I was removing my makeup?

“Honey, why are using cold cream then?” she asked. Good Question! Can I get back to you on that one Mom? No? Okay. Well, it did make my face feel softer, so…

“I am using this to soften my skin after the scrub.” My hand found and lifted up the little green scrubby pad from the bathroom sink to show Mom.

Mom just stifled a giggle and took the pad from me. “Oh Lynn! That will tear your face up if you use it. If you want a facial cleanser and some pads, we’ll go shopping and get you some and a facial moisturizer too. Cold cream is for removing makeup, not used as a facial moisturizer — well not normally. It’s a little more expensive and wasteful to use for that.”

Mom put it back and faced me again. “And what’s wrong with your voice dear? It sounds different, a little higher perhaps?”

Well, when Mother wants to know something and finds out, she just piles on the questions. I just knew that she suspected something from everything she was finding out, but I had to play this off. I hated to mislead her, especially since I was being truthful about changing myself. *sigh* I hate doing this! I really do! Here goes…

“It is? I didn’t really notice it,” I offered. Well, I didn’t notice it that much, I had, like, a ton of other things I’m worrying about at this exact moment! “Is it normal for it to be doing this?”

“No sweety, it shouldn’t. But you have been acting way out of the ordinary for the past few weeks. Maybe I should take you to the doctor for a checkup?”

Hmmm. Maybe. All this stress was sure not healthy for me.

“If you think so Mom. I’m not against it.” Mom chewed on that statement for a minute.

“Go ahead and wash that stuff off and I could use your help in fixing dinner,” she said in a more cheerful tone. “We’ll go to the store after dinner, Ok?”

I grinned. “Thanks Mom. Can you show me how to do it too?”

“Sure. I’d rather show you the right way than have you mess your looks up by doing it the wrong way with the wrong items.”

Mom left me to finish washing off makeup disaster hidden beneath a white frosting of cold cream.
 

*          *          *
 
After making sure every last speck of makeup was off and slipping my makeup case back into its hiding spot inside my room, I entered the kitchen to find my mother busy beside the sink cutting some vegetables on a cutting board. I didn’t know what possessed me to do it, but what I did next surprised even me! I just leaned forward and hugged my Mother from behind. She was warm, I felt her heart beating, and I felt safe!

My Mom just relaxed and seemingly enjoyed that moment.

I heard her comment, “Are you sure you’re my son?”

‘Well, actually Mother… I’m your daughter. I’m disguised as your son for the time being until I can get out of this mess.’ Sounds about right?

“Yes Mother. I’m your son.”

I heard her chuckle. “You’re not a clone some space aliens had left behind after they kidnapped my real child are you?”

Where did that come from? Was I really that bad before? Now I feel even worse.

“Oh Mom! I know I haven’t been a good son before, but I’m going to try and become the best for you now.”

I knew I was putting Mom on the defensive with that remark, but hey! A girl has to do what a girl has to do!

“I’m sorry honey!” Mom turned around and hugged me back in return. “I’m just not used to you being a wonderful human being.”

“Well Mom, I think it’s time for a change. And I’m committed to doing just that.” Oh boy was I committed! Really! I was! “So, umm, how did your day go?”

Mom’s smile broadened even more. “It went great. I got buyers for two houses. How did yours go?”

“Really good. Mindy and I went to the mall and found some things for Homecoming this weekend.”

“Are you going to it with her?”

“I guess that’s pretty obvious. After all, she is my best friend.”

“I’m glad you do have someone to go with dear. She seems to have a pretty positive influence on you now.”

“She always has been Mother. She is someone I can always count on.”

“I don’t know Lynn, she talked you into curling your ponytail.”

“Oh Mother! She was goofing around. Nothing was meant by it.”

“If she has changed and you have changed, then maybe my prayers are being answered.”

“I think we have changed Mom,” I said and gave her a hug.

“That’s what I’m talking about. You never used to hug me and now twice in one night? I think Mindy has cast a spell on my little boy,” she giggled.

“I hope you like it.”

“Are you serious? I love it.” Mom then moved to one side more and motioned me to the sink. “Wash your hands and let’s start on dinner.”

“Super!”
 

*          *          *
 
Later that evening, after eating, running to local pharmacy and picking up the facial items I needed and Mom picking a few things out for herself, we came back home and she proceeded to teach me how to do my face the right way. Soon afterwards, Rex called. We gabbed for about an hour on the phone in my room and I felt a little more relaxed from having talked to him. I slipped right back into being a pure girl when I heard his voice and, for that brief time, I had felt really good. Notice the words here: Pure Girl. There is no boy left inside here.

I was now laying on my bed, thinking.

I thought about how nice it had been tonight talking to Mom. Why had I never taken the time before to do this and get to know my mother better? I didn’t have to become a girl to do that. But, becoming a girl is that what I really wanted and was my sole mission in life now. My time as Lynn the girl had been without a doubt the best time of my life. Why couldn’t Lynn the boy be just as popular? I’m a nice person now and most of the kids like me. Do I really have any other friends than Mindy though? Not really. As Lynn the boy, the other students tolerated me, but I was ignored most of the time. Lynn the girl is something else. She’s pretty and popular. What a lifestyle change huh?

The other boys have started shaving and their voices sound silly as they crack when they speak. Mine still sounds like a girl when I speak, even when I don’t try to make it feminine sounding. And shaving? Yes, I do shave, but only my legs and underarms. What was Mom going to think about that? Would she buy me my own ladies razor?

I love being a girl and having a boyfriend like Rex, but it all seems so perverted somehow. I still have my memories of my father and how proud he was when we would play ball with my Little Tikes ball game. Those were memories I just couldn’t shove aside. I’m quite certain, from remembering the type of man my father was, that he would have beaten me, or worse, if he were to have seen me dressed as a girl, let alone being the homecoming princess. I felt guilty for loving the femininity I was being immersed in. I felt even worse for how easy it has been for me to be 100% girl. I want to be her, be myself, so badly, and yet I can’t. Not yet!!!

And then there was today. The loss of being on the swim team, my having to now attend school as a girl, the upcoming Homecoming functions, and then the ultimate — the conference Miss Benson wanted with Mom next week! I just know I’m going to die! I felt my eyes fill with tears again as I drifted off to sleep.

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised)   Part 5 By Arecee   Edited by Holly Hart & Sephrena Miller

The bus rumbled closer and was slowing down to our stop. I felt a twinge of fear as I realized my test of passing as a girl in front of the people I had to go to school with every day was upon me.

The doors opened and I just gulped as I took my first step up onto it. Mrs. Uttman, our driver, looked speechless as she looked me up and down as if I was some oddity. I felt a little queasy and just grabbed the first seat pole and finished pulling myself up into the aisle.

“Well Good Morning to you Lynn! My My! You look wonderful today! It’s about time you decided to be who you really are.”

I blushed furiously as I knew a lot of the other kids on the bus heard her and even now they were all looking at me in bewilderment. I couldn’t believe what I had just heard her say. SHE thought I had been a girl all along! Omigod! Did Lynn the boy ever really exist?

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 

I hardly slept any restful sleep. I was tossing, turning and kept dreaming all kinds of bad dreams! The worst one though was the one where I was outside. It was dark with stormy looking skies: dark clouds, the smell of rain in the air, and the wind. The wind just kept blowing my skirt up showing off between my legs. For some inanely strange reason - I wasn’t wearing my panties! Don’t ask me why, because I really don’t know! I was stark naked down below underneath my skirt!

I looked down and managed to glimpse that I was still a male in this clothing. This was really different from my dreaming of the past few days. In those I had both felt and was a girl! This was a nightmare and it was very scary! The landscape was barren and the trees were leaning away from the blustering wind. Leaves flew about and around me. This was going to be really bad.

I felt a presence behind me. I tried to turn around and found I couldn’t! I was frozen!

A deep voice said, “We don’t like you!”

Strong hands gripped me on my shoulders and held me in place! It wasn’t like I was able to move anywhere anyways! And Fudge it all! I was desperately trying to get away! But to no avail. I was rooted in this spot!

A crowd of people suddenly surrounded me. The younger boys all closed in around and began pulling at my clothing. I was getting jostled around and a few started to hit me. I was screaming! “Heeeeeelp me! Heeeellllpppp me Pleeaaase! Pleeeeeeasse!” The faceless men, women, and other children were raising their arms and shouting “Go on! Go on! Go on!”

I felt a tug, and to my horror, saw the wind blowing my skirt away in front of me into the crowd. This wind was freaking icy cold! The boys all began laughing and pointing at me.

“Boy! Boy!” they shouted.

“I’m a girrrrlll! This is a mistake!” I emphatically shouted back. “Pleeeeaaaase! Soooomeonnnnne Helllpp Meeee!”

Tears stung my eyes and I felt the roughness of them as they began to punch at me and pull my hair hard! My head hurt and my vision blurred.

“Do it! Do it!” the crowd chanted on.

“LEAVE-ME-ALONE! GET AWAY FROM ME!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.

I was thrashing about trying to escape their beating, but one of their hands always got a grip on me and more followed. Punch! Punch! Kick! Kick! Slap! The pain! Omigod! Omigod!

“MOOOOOOOMMMMMMMY! SAAAVE ME! SAVE ME!” *sobbing* “Mommy! Please!”

I was on the ground and kicks to my head got more savage and one stomped me in the gut. The sharpness of that pain was so severe I couldn’t breathe!

“You are a boy!” the crowd chanted on.

I’m a girl! No matter what they say! Owww! Oh… My stomach… something’s wrong! Severe pain was still wracking my body long after I realized the beating had stopped and the crowd vanished. The side of my face was numb and I could feel warm liquid oozing out over my cheeks. The grip that had held my body was gone, but I could barely move a limb! Wave after wave of pain flooded my body and I was too weak to try and move anymore. I collapsed.

The scene changed. My vision was blurred and I was sitting upright in my own bed.

Oh my God! That was sooo real! I grabbed at my stomach and held it as the pain pulsed there. A queasiness gripped me. I needed to throw up!

I quickly dashed to the bathroom where I promptly deposited everything I had eaten that day in the appropriate receptacle.

I felt a presence at the doorway as I was washing my mouth out.

“Lynn? What’s wrong hon?” my mother asked with that look of concern on her face. I couldn’t come to grips with my mind to tell her about my dream, at least the details of it. She wouldn’t understand. But I can’t lie to her. Fudge it all!

“I had a bad dream Mom. My stomach was upset so I had to throw up.”

“Well, I don’t think it was our dinner. At least if it was, I would be feeling it too. Did you eat the school lunch yesterday?”

I promptly admitted, “Yes.”

Mom thought a moment. “I don’t know if it was that then. Has something been worrying you lately?”

Umm... bingo Mom! That’s the ticket! Yeah something's worrying me. It’s depressing me and eating away at my soul! The situation I am in had escalated beyond what I thought it would and I’m really your daughter. I just wish that I could just be free and be me. Isn’t that what everyone wants? It’s too bad you are going to hate me come Monday and I’m going to have to leave. I’m sure going to miss you Mother… *sigh*

“Yes. I’m helping Miss Benson with setting up the Homecoming Gala for this weekend and helping her with a few functions for the winners with publicity appearances starting Wednesday. There is a lot of work preparing for these appearances and I’m running errands for her. Between this event and my homework, I really feel worn out.”

Well that was the truth, from one perspective of it. Just I had to leave out the gritty details out like the fact that I am one of the winners.

“She must think a lot about you for you to volunteer for that.”

Yeah. Mindy volunteered me for this alright. And I had to go along with it too. I finished rinsing the sink out and faced my Mother.

I weakly smiled, “She does Mother. I have a 3.9 gpa and have so far kept my grades up while participating. “

My Mom just hugged me for a moment and pulled my hair back from over my face.

“You just promise me that you’ll stop the volunteer work if it gets too much for you? Ok?”

That, I’m afraid, was a little impossible at this point, Mom. I have to keep up this deception or I’ll be going down in flames even faster.

“I will Mom.” I answered as I hugged her back and then headed back to my bedroom.
 

*          *          *
 
The alarm was beeping beside me and I stirred. I reached over and switched it off. Ughh! Why did I have to wake up and move? I was so warm and comfortable here! I snuggled back into a fetal position and started to go back to sleep.

What seemed like a minute later I heard, “Lynn? You had the alarm set for an hour earlier than usual. It’s 6 am. Did you have something that you needed to do?”

Mom was in my doorway. I blinked my eyes and stared at the alarm clock. 6 am. Hmmm... What was I supposed to be doing? … Oh Snap! I have to get to Mindy’s for changing clothes!

I sat up wiping the sleep from my eyes. Oooo! My stomach did not feel so good and my throat was sore.

“Y-yy *cough! cough!* Dry Throat! -es Mom. I have to help *cough!* with reception committee for the event. *cough!*”

Mom gave me a worried look as I crawled out of that cozy, comfortable spot and trudged onwards to the bathroom for my shower.
 

*          *          *
 
The crisp morning air as the sun was slowly rising up into the sky made this day feel like it was really different. Birds chirped up in the trees bordering along the sidewalks of other people’s yards as I made my way along my usual path to Mindy’s. Yeppers, today is sure gonna be different! I hope I survive it. Images of my bad dream last night kept creeping back into my thoughts.

I had just walked across Mindy’s lawn over to the driveway and reached the side door to her parent’s garage. True to her word, as I turned the handle slowly, it was unlocked. I opened up the cabinet door she had mentioned as I had to look twice. Mindy had hung up a brown camo that had yellow and orange flowers with a black highlights and a dark blue skirt. My black low heels, short white socks and under things were present also. Then my breast forms. I had asked for less boyish, but this!, this was like to an extreme opposite! *sigh*

Oh, well.

I quickly stripped out of my usual clothes and donned my girl clothing as fast as possible. The glue wasn’t here, but there was no way I was going to even try to glue the forms on even if it had been here! I was just going to have to wear them loose inside my bra. This was going to feel just great all day like that! Mindy had also left me a cute multicolored butterfly pendant necklace to wear and a small silver looking ring. I slipped them on.

The fear of Mr. Swanson walking out here on me as I was changing clothes was all the impetus I needed to rapidly change. I then folded my boy clothes neatly back into my gym bag and hid it back inside the cabinet behind the empty box Mindy had left out.

I then picked up my pack and quietly locked the garage door behind me.
 

*          *          *
 
I was not waiting at the bus stop that was only a few houses down from Mindy’s house for very long when I found her walking towards me. I was brushing my hair, having taken it out of my ponytail strap. I had taken the time while I had waited for her to use my small 2-inch handheld fliptop mirror and applied just a touch of lipstick and a hint of light powder blue eye shadow around my eyelids. Forget the Mascara! I just had neither the time nor inclination for that today!

Mindy just slowed down as she got closer, obviously checking me out.

“Lynn? My god! You are beautiful!”

I stopped brushing my long blonde hair hanging down over my shoulders by a good few inches that was full bodied to boot. Mom’s conditioner sure did what it claimed! I was still not used to all the praise Mindy and everyone else keeps throwing at me. But all the same, I still felt embarrassed and just blushed.

“Am I?” I scratchily asked.

Mindy just grinned. “Yes, you are! Compared to you I’m just a plain girl.”

I was slightly annoyed. “Min, you are just as beautiful too.”

Mindy’s look changed. “Lynn is there something wrong? Your voice sounds somewhat scratchy.”

Yep. Last night — throwing up works wonders on the human voice.

“I threw up last night. My stomach wasn’t feeling so good.”

“Poor thing!” Mindy cooed as she embraced me. This contact thing between me and Mindy developed more as I had been dressing to the hilt as Lynn the girl. Girls sure seemed to be a lot more emotional and into different ways of communicating by speech, tone inflection and touch. I never paid any attention to any of that before this prank. But it sure felt really nice.

“Remember Lynn, We have to stay after school today for a little bit. We have to report to Miss Benson after school so she can go over what we are doing for the Cancer luncheon tomorrow. You will be missing out on 4^th period and a touch of 5^th. Are you ready for that?”

I sort of frowned. “Isn’t it enough I am missing out on a lot of homework already? I miss too much more and I won’t be passing some of my classes.”

“I am going to be helping you there girl. We are studying tonight together right? My Mom is going to pick us up from school too, so don’t worry about the bus.”

I sighed.

“Yes, I think I’m ready. I just hope your Mother doesn’t put 2 and 2 together and recognize me.”

Mindy snorted. “Honestly Lynn. You were standing right in front of her in broad daylight and she didn’t even give you a second look. Relax girlfriend.”

“If you say so.” I wasn’t really convinced, but then, what choice did I really have?

The bus rumbled closer and was slowing down to our stop. I felt a twinge of fear as I realized my test of passing as a girl in front of the people I had to go to school with every day was upon me.

The doors opened and I just gulped as I took my first step up onto it. Mrs. Uttman, our driver, looked speechless as she looked me up and down as if I was some oddity. I felt a little queasy and just grabbed the first seat pole and finished pulling myself up into the aisle.

“Well Good Morning to you Lynn! My My! You look wonderful today! It’s about time you decided to be who you really are.”

I blushed furiously as I knew a lot of the other kids on the bus heard her and even now they were all looking at me in bewilderment. I couldn’t believe what I had just heard her say. SHE thought I had been a girl all along! Omigod! Did Lynn the boy ever really exist?

I expected weird looks and people to say ‘Why on earth are you dressing up like a girl?’, but not the positive support I was getting and the fact that a lot of people, it seems, had already believed I had always been a girl. This was beginning to scare me!

Not knowing what else to say, I replied, “Thank you Mrs. Uttman. I have turned over a new leaf.”

Yep! I really have, haven't I?

I began walking down between the seats and past the stares of many of the boys and girls I rode with every day. The looks from the boys were one of awe, and from the looks of the girls, I could sense envy and some stares of jealousy.

I sat down in our usual seat, set my pack on the floor next to the window and held my skirt to me as I scooted in towards the window. Mindy sat down beside as the bus began its forward motion again.

I put my hands back on my lap, all nervous and such, as some of the kids kept turning around looking at me, not quite believing what they saw. I tried to ignore it.

Some of these kids actually voted for me as their Homecoming Princess. A lot of them did believe I was a girl. I knew some of them didn’t know me. But still, all of this attention was making me feel very vulnerable and scared. This was the first time that I ever had attention like this. Boys actually had an attraction towards me too! I felt it as I passed them through the bus aisle. Wow! Some of them keep looking back at me too. I don’t really know what I am feeling right now!

I turned my head to look out the window to keep from looking directly at the stares of others.

Mindy tapped my arm. “Lynn, you see all of them keep looking at you?”

I scratchily droned, “Yes Mindy. I do see it. I’m trying to ignore it.”

“Why would you girl? They all appreciate how you look.”

I turned my head and stared directly at her. I couldn’t believe that she didn’t know how I was feeling right now!

“Mindy,” I hushedly whispered, “I feel like I’m on display! That I’m..I’m..just a thing!”

“Welcome to womanhood Lynn! That’s exactly what we are to everyone. We are always on display. That’s why we always have to look our best too!” she quipped back in a similar hushed tone of voice.

I looked back out the window. “It’s frightening.”
 

*          *          *
 
We reached school and Mindy and me got off of the bus and proceeded into the school. Some of the kids were just beginning to scope me out as we walked down the hallway to our lockers. Boys were checking me out as possible girlfriend material. No one had to tell me that. I knew it! I had seen these looks on them before when I had been what I thought was a boy as I watched them scoping other girls out. Now I was the one being scoped out! Snap!

As I put up some of the books I wouldn’t need until the latter half of the day and pulling out the ones I needed for 1^st and 2^nd period I just realized that not once did anyone sneer at me or say that I was gay or a freak! None of the violence, like what I had experienced in the dream, was even remotely visible. Is this real? Or is this a dream also?

Mindy and me walked from our lockers to Mr. Copeland’s homeroom. I heard two wolf whistles coming from some boys we had just passed. Oh My God! I paused, turned around, and saw that they were doing it to me! One of them waved a greeting towards me, almost as if he wanted me to come over there and strike up a conversation. I did what any red blooded boy could do in this situation!

I turned back around, blushing, and held my books up to my face, trying to hide, as I continued walking on towards homeroom.

“Lynn, stop that! You have no reason to hide!”

Ashamedly I cringed, “Mindy I’m scared! Going to the mall was one thing. THIS! This… is soo different!” Then in a more quiet hiss, “Everyone here knows me! I just know I’m going to be beaten up and in the hospital before the day is over with!”

Mindy, with this ridiculous chuckle, was quick to point out, “Where is the Lynn that was making out with Rex all over the movie theater this past weekend?”

Oh my God! I can’t believe she was going to use that against me right now! That was low!

I felt a little angry and snapped back at her, “That Lynn! She is hiding inside of me with the door locked! This is real life Mindy! Out here, I can be really hurt badly if someone finds out! I mean, they all know me!”

Mindy turned around both sides of us as we halted for a moment. She was waving her hands making her point. “So, has anyone here been doing that to you? Huh? All they see is the girl you are portraying Lynn.”

I looked around for myself. Yeah, she seemed to be right. I saw a few of the kids still staring at me, Lynn, the object of desire in their eyes. Oh Fudge! I still wanted to hide!
 

*          *          *
 
We finally reached the open door of Mr. Copeland’s class. I could heard the usual morning drone of everyone talking inside there. I took a deep breath, resolved to keep from running away entirely, and stepped inside.

The talking immediately died down as everyone turned their heads to look right at me.

I so wanted to die!

Between the Wow’s! , the Omigods!, I can’t believe how gorgeous she is! remarks, my feet somehow started moving as I headed towards the back of the room to my seat — eyes still following my every move. I heard a slap and boy going “OW!” as I knew that was Harry getting slapped by his girlfriend Dana sitting beside him for looking at me. Wow!

Then, to make matters worse, before I reached my seat, I heard the unenviable voice say,

“Miss Collins! My word! You actually dressed appropriately for once! Please, take your seat and I’ll call the roll.” Mr. Copeland had just walked in right behind me and saw me before reaching his desk.

Oh God! Please, just strike me with a lightning bolt right here, right now! I sat down and Mindy sat beside me in her seat.

And this was just the beginning of my day!
 

*          *          *
 
In every class, I had similar reactions from the students and teachers. Not once was I insulted or did people get all bent out of shape seeing me dressed like this. Apparently, and quite to my astonishment, everyone had believed I was a girl all along! Unbelievable!

My blood pressure went up when three of my teachers noted that my sex on their roll logs listed me as a male. I stated calmly that there was an error on my records and that Miss Benson was aware of it and was in the process of correcting it. I then added, “Do I look like a boy to you?”

They shook their heads and left it at that.
 

*          *          *
 
At lunchtime, I had several boys try to sit beside me at mine and Mindy’s usual table and hit on me for dating. I wanted to flee so badly! Mindy helped fend them off of me and added that I was still too shy about dating and said to give me some space and time to be myself. I had just come out of the grunge look and was trying to open up. Well, it was all true. I still couldn’t help but look at some of those gorgeous boys! I began to daydream about them. I licked my lips slightly in the anticipation of being with them. Kissing, and being held. Mmmmmmmm! My insides seemed to warm up at thinking about those thoughts.

I felt another smack on my arm. Mindy had just smacked me!

Startled, I rather angrily asked, “What the heck did you do that for?”

Mindy gave me that duh! look. “Quit encouraging these boys to want to hit on you!”

“I was doing no such thing!”

“Oh my god Lynn! You were! You have to watch how you look at people, the expressions you use, and how you talk! That is something I am going to have to teach you from now until Homecoming. You are still new at this and relating with others as a girl is no piece of cake! We come under a different set of rules than boys have. There is still a lot you need to learn. I am not going to keep sitting here helping push all these boys away from you if you are going to keep giving them the ‘I’m available’ look!
 

*          *          *
 
In my Biology science class at 5^th period, when all of the stares and buzz about my new look had died down, one of the boys in my water polo class, Mark, who sitting at the kiosk table behind me while we were attempting to dissect frogs, boldly came out to ask me what I was praying would never be asked!

“Why were you on the boy’s water polo team, Lynn? And naked?” he asked quietly, while pointing to his chest.

What was I going to say? That I’m really a boy, but here I am sitting dressed as a girl? What the fudge am I going to say?

I turned, angrily and huffed. I gave him as angry a stare as I could with tears in my eyes. Yeah, my eyes tended to leak why I get upset. And this, this was the key to my being upset! I really wanted to be on that team. I loved the sport, and I loved swimming, and yet I can’t now because of my disguise. If he says this any louder or spreads the rumor, which I now fully expected to happen, I was dead!

He met my gaze, and for the life of me, seemed to drop it. I don’t know why he did or what he was feeling inside, but having seen me as I am now and my anger, it somehow deflated him. Or so it seemed to me.

“Look,” he whispered back to me again, “If it means anything to you, I knew you were trying to prove something, and I had no problem with you there trying. I did always admire you. You look very pretty, you know? I never understood though, why you were trying to be pretend to be a boy.”

Well, here he was apologizing and hitting on me at the same time. Wow, girls really do have it hard in the social life at school! It’s a constant war trying to keep boys at bay, and be yourself, until you find the one that interested you! I quickly thought just how I wanted to respond to what he had said.

I leaned over, with tear-blurred vision, and stated, “I wanted to compete with boys in the same sport. I wanted to be someone and to be treated just like boys would be. You saw me in the pools. I’m not well built up here.” I motioned pointing to my chest. “I’m using little helpers to give me some shape until I do bloom. I didn’t think anything would be wrong as I did not have breasts yet like other girl’s. I’m ashamed I don’t, but I thought it would be the opportunity of a lifetime to try and compete while I was able to do so. I did not realize just how much trouble I was causing.”

Mark nodded and returned, “Well coach sent a memorandum to all of us on the team this morning explaining that someone from another school had showed up using your name and looked very similar to you, but as a boy. It was an inter-school prank and had been stopped. He had kicked them off of the team and appropriate action was taken.”

Mark passed me the notice. I read it.

Wow! It’s all untrue, but what else could be done to cover up the fact I had been there? Now, the two wins I had led our team in were stricken from the records and the meet judges were going to adjust the scores for the year’s end. *groan* Would others keep quiet about it or believe it? At least Coach Wilson was helping me rather than hurting me. I did not quite believe he disliked me that much because of how much energy and effort I had put into the team while I was there. In his own way, he was protecting me as well as himself.

“Most of the others on the team,” Mark continued quietly, interrupting my thoughts, “do believe it was someone else, but, I know you. I have seen you throughout the school. If you want to pretend and act like a boy, it’s cool in my book. Your jokes were always funny to me.”

He grinned.

Wow! Maybe I never really was a boy at all? Everyone thinks I had been a girl. My ego was thoroughly shattered! Hmm. Maybe there are some benefits to being a girl after all? I was just learning about how to wield emotions and play things so that they could go my way. I knew I had a long ways to go and a lot to learn still!

I quickly handed his notice back to him and we both turned around and got back to our dissection work as Mr. Keatman peered over looking at each pair’s work on the dissections. This dissection stuff was really gross!
 

*          *          *
 
After Home Economics at 6^th period, and garnering a pile of assignments and pre-test material to study, I made my way to the School Office. I was amazed, simply amazed! Everyone seemed to think I had just changed clothing for looks and had not changed my sex from boy to girl. I mean really! Was I that poor of a boy that my trying to be one and dress like one was that pitiful? Did I really look like a girl so much that those who saw me believed what they wanted? And what they thought they saw was just a girl? I’m still debating on that one.

The office secretaries, whom had seen me in there quite often this past week, both did a double-take as they saw me come in. I stood there with a bit more confidence in myself than I had before I came to school this morning.

“Miss Benson had asked me to see me?” I demurely asked.

Mindy chose that precise moment to enter the office. She had been requested here as well and I had started to wonder where she was.

Nancy, the secretary I saw the most replied, “I’ll tell her that you are here Lynn. You look absolutely stunning dear.”

I blushed. I seemed to be doing that a lot recently too!

Nancy opened the door and then came back out saying, “She’ll see you both now.”

Mindy and I made our way through the counter swing door and walked into Miss Benson’s office. To say Miss Benson was surprised would be an understatement. Her jaw dropped open and she almost looked like a fish trying to breathe in the water.

Both Mindy and I took a seat in the chairs in front of her desk and looked at her. Mindy looked at me and then back to Miss Benson, who was suddenly lacking for words.

“Lynn, child, are you sure you are really a boy?”

“Yes, Ma’m. At least I think I was. After the reactions of everyone today, I’m not so sure anymore.”

Miss Benson continued to stare, critically taking in every detail about me. I was really on display!

“Then I assume from what I see and heard that you will have no problem at all pulling off these events and attending Homecoming?”

Mindy beamed, “Absolutely Miss Benson. Lynn seems to be a natural at this and all of the boys are hitting on him.”

Miss Benson raised an eyebrow. “Are you properly teaching Lynn how to politely say no to boy’s advances? The last thing we would need is for one to discover who Lynn really is.”

I cut in, “Yes Miss Benson. I am. Mindy is a very good teacher when it comes to girl’s ways of doing things. I’m not sure of actually wanting to date boys either.”

Miss Benson’s mouth twitched at hearing that. It took her brain a moment to process what I had just said. Mindy just smiled back at me.

“Well Lynn, tomorrow is the big day, your first in public as a representative of this school. Do you think you can pull it off?” Miss Benson continued.

I was a failure at representing the school on the water polo team, but there was no way I was going to fail it in the Homecoming Gala and the associated meetings!

“Yes Miss Benson, I’m ready.”

“I hope so. Tomorrow I want you to bring all of the specified clothes I had asked for, especially the dress. Lynn, you come to my office after 3^rd period and you can change in here. I’ll escort you to and from the luncheon. All you’ll have to do is eat a little lunch, present the check and say a few words about how proud you are to be a princess and what the Cancer society means to you - including how proud you are of their work towards helping others. Be sure to be tactful and emit warm feelings towards them. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes Miss Benson,” both Mindy and me chimed together.

“Good! Make it through this and Homecoming and the other functions will be easy,” Miss Benson finished. “I just cannot get over just how much a girl you are Lynn. You truly look and act the part! You have my compliments. I expect you will be able to make it through the rest of the year?”

I nodded, with a little sadness showing in my posture.

“Oh, and Lynn, do remind your mother of our meeting on Monday morning? I need to bring her up to date on your situation and alter the records accordingly.”

She just had to remind me of that! Mindy appeared a little frightened too.

“I will Miss Benson.”
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy and I were gabbing some, standing out under the school overhang along the sidewalk where the buses parked each morning and afternoon picking up and dropping off students. It wasn’t too long before Mrs. Swanson drove up and picked the both of us up.

Mindy’s Mother did not recognize me as Lynn and treated me as the girl I appeared to be. How come Mindy was always so right and I was so wrong? ’Snot fair!

After doing our homework, Mindy went downstairs into the garage and unlocked the side door. After she came back in, unnoticed by her mother, I gathered my school things and made my farewell. I went outside the front door, bee-lined around to the garage and entered it. I quickly changed clothing and slipped my hair back into a low ponytail. I wiped off my lipstick and eye shadow with a paper towel and jammed it into my pocket.

I need to get rid of it more thoroughly when I get home! I thought to myself as I locked the door and exited.
 

*          *          *
 
I made it home before Mom did and removed the leftover makeup. I wetted down my hair some to slick it down and return some of the grunge look back to me. Then, as I promised I would, I began vacuuming the living room and picking things up.

Mom came home and she was also shocked. Today, I seemed to have been a hit as Lynn the girl, and to my Mother as well, as Lynn the boy. I was very careful and thorough with my cleaning and my Mom took in every little detail of the job I had done. Girl’s really do notice the little details of things. Yep, I’m learning that on the fly!

Mom and me had another wonderful evening together during dinner and afterwards. I was truly saddened at all of the years I had missed of enjoying her company like this with her. I really enjoyed sharing time with her like this. I wish I could reverse time and go back then to make up for it all and be the boy that she wanted. But I wasn’t a boy — was I? But starting Monday, I’m going to have to start checking the classifieds for a new home… *gulp!*

I hardly dreamed this night. It was as if the intensity and purpose of them had left me. I was adrift in a peaceful slumber for one night at least!
 

*          *          *
 
I awoke early the next morning, just like I had yesterday, and found that Mom had already left for work. Today was going to be my big day for me so I went to shower. I soaped myself up and felt stubble on my legs and not to mention the uncomfortable scratching under my arms. I saw that Mom had left her razor in the shower, so I finally did what any red-blooded girl would do. I borrowed it!

It felt good to be smooth again.
 

*          *          *
 
I changed at Mindy’s just like I had the previous day and Mindy was carrying my blue formal dress in a zippered travel carry bag. She dropped it by Miss Benson’s office before school started and was told in no uncertain terms to be here after 3^rd period to help me get ready.

I was as nervous as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs. I had to keep turning down advances by boys and I took in all the complements that I was getting for dressing more appropriately. It seemed as though each class lasted only ten minutes and when the bell ending third period rang, I almost jumped through the ceiling! My only thought was whether or not I could do this thing!

Miss Benson and Mindy were waiting for me as I entered her office.

“You’ll have to hurry Lynn. Take your under things and put them on in my bathroom. Don’t worry about gluing your forms on that you are wearing because it will be easier for you to change out of when you get home from school. Now get a move on,” Miss Benson ordered.

I closed the door behind me as I entered the bathroom. I pulled off the girl clothing I had worn to school this morning and looked at myself in the mirror. I still saw a very pretty girl, even without the makeup on. I felt my stomach turn. How is it that everyone thinks I am a girl or always had been? I mean, I know inside now that I am a girl, but geez! Do I get any credit for having been a boy ever? Does the thing that makes me a male between my legs even count?

I slipped on the pantyhose and then a fresh pair of panties. I was standing there completely in my under things. Mindy slid in and began to perform her magic with makeup quickly on me. Soon, Mindy was helping me into the blue formal dress that sort of hugged me around my topside with a semi-low cut where neither my bra nor forms would be visible. On went Mindy’s pendant again, the ring I had been wearing, and now the heels.

“Lynn you are simply gorgeous!” Mindy complimented me as she passed me the cardigan sweater to put on over top of the dress. Again I looked into the mirror. There was no doubt that I would be the Princess the women were expecting.
 

*          *          *
 
“Heavens Be!” Miss Benson exclaimed. “I’d never believe it if I wasn’t seeing this with my own eyes.”

“Thank you, Miss Benson,” I giggled nervously.

“You look every bit a Princess my dear! I have never had a Princess as beautiful as you Lynn! This is going to be the best year ever!” Miss Benson was absolutely enthralled with my look. It was as if I had cast a spell upon her.

“I want to check to be sure that nothing is amiss! Walk around my office for me and let me see your pose. It wouldn’t do for you to be walking like a boy.”

I walked as instructed. My lower heels were so much easier to walk in! My walk, posture, and every movement was picture perfect and Miss Benson was beyond impressed.

“My goodness Lynn! Where did you learn to walk like that? Was it Mindy?”

Mindy shook her head no.

“I just seem to have taken to it naturally after I tried on my first pair of girl’s shoes Miss Benson. Mindy was just as astounded as you are now.”

“I can see that! You walk with more grace than half the real girls in this school!”

My face reddened with that compliment. I really did not think I was better than a real girl at walking like one.

“Are you sure that you are Ok with this Lynn?” Miss Benson looked at me with some concern.

“I’m a little nervous. I’ll be okay.”

“Don’t be nervous Lynn. You’re a beautiful girl! Hold your head up high. Be proud of being a Princess, because from what I’ve seen so far, you are more than just a Princess.”

I felt my eyes begin to water with happiness. I was proud! I loved being this Princess so much! I just wish circumstances could have been more favorable and this didn’t have to be the end result of a prank gone wrong! I truly loved this!

“Don’t you dare cry Lynn! We don’t have time to fix your makeup again,” Mindy laughed.
 

*          *          *
 
We went to the luncheon and everything went even better that we had hoped for. I presented the check - you know one of those really big ones made for photo opportunities? The local paper was there and they took pictures of Miss Benson and me with the officers of the group. I spent a lot of time talking to the ladies and they fawned over me as if I was their daughter. If this was what being Princess was all about - Heck! I’m going to run again next year!
 
*          *          *
 
We returned to school and I was soon back inside of Miss Benson’s office.

“Okay Lynn, you have no idea of how proud I am of you! You pulled this thing off without a hitch. The ladies loved you and I’m sure most of them would have loved to have brought you home with them. You are just so much a natural girl, it’s as Mindy had said - really eerie.”

Miss Benson’s eyes brimmed with pleasure.

“Now, you have nothing more to do until Saturday. Saturday morning you have to be at the spa by 9 am. You and the rest of the girls are going to be getting a makeover. It will give you a chance to meet the rest of your court. I know that you’ve never been to a spa, but don’t worry, you’ll have fun. Just go along with whatever they want to do to you.” Miss Benson then handed me a schedule sheet showing the complete Spa treatment and the times of things.

“The worst thing that could happen is that you’ll be even prettier than you were today.”

Embarrassment flooded me and I couldn’t help but feel it. I knew that I was beautiful looking but I didn’t need all this praise! I blushed again. But then I thought about the Spa Makeover. What would happen if one of the ladies there discovered me?

“Miss Benson, suppose they find me out? Discover me? What should I do?” I nervously asked.

“All they are going to be doing is your hair, nails, and makeup. So don’t worry about being discovered.”

I nodded, but I still wasn’t so certain about that!

Miss Benson then more softly asked, “Did you enjoy today Lynn?”

“Yes Miss Benson. I did have a lovely time today.”

“You seemed to. For some reason you seem to shine when you’re a girl. You did not seem to have much confidence when you were a boy. It’s too bad you aren’t really a girl.”

Hmm! Little did she know!

“I do feel more confident, but I don’t know why?”

Miss Benson paused and thought for a moment.

“Maybe this is who you’re meant to be? I cannot say for certain, but only you would know the answer. But in any case, I am truly sorry that this prank got out of control. I am not looking forward to explaining this to your Mother, but I will not cross the line in changing any student’s records without their parent’s permission. I can also understand your feelings as well in not wanting to admit to this prank in front of the entire school either. I do wish you the best in fulfilling your role, and if you have any problems, do come and see me. I’ll try to help you with whatever your problems are. I’m not heartless. Try and have fun Saturday. I’ll see you at the parade,” Miss Benson said.

Feeling that we were dismissed, Mindy and I left her office.
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy remembered, “Lynn, you’ll have to be at my house at 7 am Saturday. We need to have time for your forms to set and get you dressed.”

“What about your parents?”

“It’s Saturday! They won’t be up until eleven. Just be there and I’ll wait by the door, so don’t knock. That way they won’t be up.”

Mindy just always seems to know everything and has a plan. She sure has the brains of our friendship!
 

*          *          *
 
I went home and later that evening told my mother what the schedule was going to be like on Saturday. Naturally, I couldn’t tell her that I was one of the girls in the parade and would also be at the dance as one! I had just realized that this was going to be one of the most special times in my entire life. A part of me ached deeply to want to just tell my Mother and have it done with so she could be there and enjoy the event with me. I really wanted her to be there! But… She was going to hate me like that! She wants a son, not me, as her daughter! Fudge!!! Life can be so cruel.

“Mom,” I then mentioned to her, as we were both sitting on the couch watching television together, “Mindy and I are on the decoration committee for the dance Saturday. I have to be at Mindy’s by seven in the morning.”

“Are you going to be able to get up that early?” Mom gave me the eye.

“Of course I will. I have had to be up early every day this week, I will manage that. I’ll be going straight to the dance after the setup, so I won’t be coming home until it’s over. You won’t have to wait up for me,” I stated.

Oh God! I hated to say that! I really wanted to say “Mom, I’d really love for you to come and be there with me! I want you to see your daughter in all her glory.” But I can’t!!!!! It was impossible!

I clenched my hands in anger and then, let them go and relax.

Changing me back to Lynn the boy wouldn’t be a problem either since I was changing at Mindy’s. It would just be better if Mom were asleep when I got home. Just in case I walked in kinda funny. I wondered just what my feet would feel like after all that dancing in heels? It sounded pretty painful to me!

Mom replied, “Normally I would wait up for you Lynn, but I have a wedding shower to attend for one of my co-workers and I won’t be home until after midnight. What time is the dance over?”

“I think eleven,” I answered.

“Okay. I want you to call me when you get home so I won’t be worried about you.”

“Yes Mother.”
 

*          *          *
 
Thursday and Friday were pretty boring and routine other than the excitement in school about the homecoming dance. The shock of my new way of dressing seemed to have worn off and I was accepted among everyone in school as a girl. There never seemed to be any doubts in anyone’s mind I had ever been a boy. That still upsets me!

I then went from ecstatic to fright as I thought about what was going to be taking place. Would my secret be discovered before the dance? The most calming thing on my mind was that wonderful day I spent at the luncheon. There was no question in any of those women’s minds about my gender. I was treated as a girl and accepted as one as well. They treated me very special there. I just loved it!

The only really creepy thing that happened to me was at lunch on Friday. I was approached by four senior girls who had a question for me.

“You’re Lynn aren’t you?” a blonde girl asked.

“Umm, yes?” I politely answered.

“I voted for you for Princess,” she said.

“Umm, Thank you. Thank you very much,” I responded with a smile and blushed furiously.

“Can I ask you a question?” she asked.

I got my blush to stop and could now move my mouth again.

“I guess so.”

“You’re so pretty, why did you dress the way that you used to?”

Well, here we go, back to same question Carla had asked me. Good thing I remember what I said, huh? I don’t want to lie and by some perversion of reality, it did seem close to the actual truth so I went with it.

“I was tired of being treated like I was object that could break, long ago when I was little. I had an urge to break out of that image and be one of the boys. I wanted to be treated as an equal and do things with them instead of being told “You can’t do this with us. You’re a girl.”

“I more or less kept doing it like I had a point to prove. But when I won the Homecoming Princess Contest… well… I had to really ask myself if I should still be fighting to be like that anymore. I found that I no longer really had the desire to. This Contest and event, it just changed my way of thinking of how I should be.”

Oh boy, did it ever!

“I knew it,” responded the brunette. “I have three brothers and the only time that they let me play with them was when I dressed down to their level and behaved something like you did. I’m actually glad you did drop the grunge look. You’re far too pretty for it.”

Here comes the blush again. Oooo!

“I’m sort of glad I did too,” I meekly added. I did like being pretty. Being a girl has advantages!

The girls left and Mindy started laughing.

She then whispered into my ear, “If only they knew!” She began to giggle again. I had to wait until she stopped her fit for her to continue on.

“Where did you come up with that line girlfriend?”

I pursed my lips then turned facing her. “I happened to have to use that line all week to explain my change of attire.” I pointed at my camo.

Mindy just giggled. “Can you imagine their expressions if they knew that they had just talked to a boy?”

“Stuff it Mindy. It was all I could think of saying.” I looked down at my lunch rather moody. Sometimes Mindy can be such a pill!

“Well Miss Princess, I can see their point. It was a shame to cover your natural beauty all that time.”

I frowned and looked over at Mindy again. “Mindy, you know I can’t dress like I want — as a boy again! I’m in so much hot water I can’t see straight! All of this is going to end come Monday after Mom finds out. And you won’t have to worry about a friend to tease sitting here at the lunch table with you. It’s because I’ll be gone!”

Mindy’s face turned to disbelief. “What do you mean you’ll be gone? Your Mom isn’t going to get rid of you!”

I retorted, “Oh? Shows how much you know! My Mother, all week, has been going on how much she loves and adores me — as her son! She just is not the type of Mother that wanted to have a daughter. She is going to kick me out and I’m going to have to live with some different parents — what do they call them when someone is in my situation?”

“Foster parents?” Mindy gushed, still not believing what I was saying.

“Yes! Foster parents! I’ll have to switch schools too along with a new home. So you won’t have good old Lynn around to tease.”

I rested my head down on top of my arms folded on the table. I was upset!

“And besides… I like being a boy,” I muffled out weakly through my arms. I don’t know if I really believed that or not. I enjoyed everything I was finding out about being a girl. But I couldn’t let Mindy know right now. And right now she was annoying me!

I felt Mindy’s arms go around me and pulled me to her. I didn’t resist. “Lynn calm down! I am sorry Okay? I did not mean to hurt you. I am so sorry.”

Great! There go my eyes again - crying.

“Lynn, your Mother is not going to get rid of you. She may have a difficult time understanding all of this mess that we are in. I mean we — you and me!”

“Look, if you really have to stay dressed as a girl until Christmas, I will help you, you know that! I don’t want you to have to move either! We will figure something out Ok? After this Homecoming event, no more pressure on you being a girl okay? Stay dressed as a boy after school all you want and we will still go places.”

A girl had walked over from the table beside us and asked, “Mindy? Is Lynn alright?”

I was trying to shut the entire world out while I clenched my eyes closed and leaning there against Mindy.

“She’s fine Laura. She is just upset at some things at home.” She said.

Maybe I won’t be fine? Maybe I’ve already become the girl I so innocently tried to pose as. God, this is so messed up! I just can’t tell my Mother anything about this. But she was going to know come Monday. I have just got to stop worrying about this! Enjoy these last few days, because, honestly, I don’t know what’s going to happen to me. So live up each day, like it’s my last!

“I just wanted to be sure she was okay Min. I do consider her a friend and I want to help if I can.”

A friend? I sniffled and pulled my head up off of Mindy’s shoulder and wiped my eyes.

Outside of Mindy, I had no real friends. Since I started to have to dress as a girl here in school, the kids here actually believed I had been a girl all along and they liked me and talked to me. As Lynn the boy, this would have been impossible! A friend? I am shocked!

“I-I-I’ll be f-fine.” I tried to reassure Laura. “D-did you really mean w-what you said?”

Laura smiled a smile that radiated genuine warmth. “Yes Lynn, I did. I want to be your friend.”

I sniffled and then quietly said, "Thank you. *sniffle* I would like that... a lot."

I weakly held out my hand to her. She took it.

“Friends,” we both stated as we shook hands.

Maybe Miracles do happen?
 

*          *          *
 
Tonight, being a Friday night — and the night before Homecoming — I had stayed up some with Mom watching a movie she liked. It was more of a drama type film and I found that I was really immersing myself into it. It wasn’t the action type film I normally watched, but I was actually trying to sense what the man and the woman main characters were feeling. I was anticipating their voices and feeling what they felt. Mom rather enjoyed my company watching it with her.

I slept fitfully this night. I had many dreams, but the one I wound up remembering, even to this day, was the one about Rex.

In this dream, I was a real Princess. I was wearing a strapless gown with many petticoats. I had grown large breasts that held the dress up. I was being escorted to a carriage by my handmaiden and was helped into it by a footman. It was right out of Cinderella! A team of ten large horses was pulling this carriage - all of them were pure white.

I arrived at my destination and Rex, the regal and handsome Prince that he was, was there to help me from my carriage.

“My Princess,” he swooned. “You did come! I had been hoping and dreaming that you would. I want… I want to ask you… for your hand… in marriage.”

I had stepped onto the ground and looked at his darling handsome face. It was so full of questioning hope! My stomach was doing flip-flops! We were so in love and a marriage proposal was the only thing a girl wanted from her handsome prince!

It was too bad I had to reveal the truth and shatter this Prince’s dreams!

“My Darling Rex, if only I could marry you. It’s just not possible! I’m only fourteen years old, and - I’m a boy,” I replied.

“But I love you and I will wait until you are old enough to marry,” Rex countered. I felt the same twitch in my mouth I had seen Miss Benson do in school. Rex must not have heard me?

“But, I’m a boy,” I repeated, pointing at the obvious swelling of my chest.

“You’re not a boy, my Princess. Only girls can be Princesses, and that is so obvious as to what you are, Princess Lynn.”

Wow! Rex had such cool logic! He must be right!

“What you say has to be true then. I’m a Princess, therefore, I must be a girl! Oh, kiss me my dearest, of course I’ll marry you!” I gleefully shouted and jumped into his arms.

As he held me up in his arms, which I might add felt so darn wonderful!! Mmmmm!, Rex kissed me. Our lips met and this kiss was the kiss of all dreams! None could be more perfect!

“I love you Rex!” I cooed.

“I love you my Princess.”

Our perfect love was interrupted by my annoying alarm.

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised)   Part 6 By Arecee   Edited by Holly Hart & Sephrena Miller

 
I felt as though I was walking on a cloud! I looked at the clock and realized that I had been here for more than five hours!! I saw Mindy sitting in the reception area. She looked up as I approached her.

When she saw me she gasped.

I had hoped her face would have a look of happiness because of how I looked, but what her face showed was total sheer panic!

“Oh my God! Lynn!!! What have you done?” she gasped. The panic on her face came through in her voice.

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
I switched the alarm off!

Why did early mornings always come so early? *groan* Especially on Saturdays?

I pulled my covers off of me and slowly sat up. What a dream!

It took me a moment for my head to clear as I got up and stretched. I had a lot to do today, so I had better get started. Mindy said that I would shower at her place, so I threw on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt with some obscure heavy metal band on it. I tied my hair back down low into my familiar ponytail.

I went down the hall and slowly opened up my Mother’s bedroom door. Yep! She was still asleep. I figured I’d better let her know that I was leaving. I didn’t want to worry her.

I gently kissed my Mother on her cheek. She started to stir.

“Mom, I’m leaving,” I whispered in her ear.

“Ung, it’s so early. What time is it?” she sleepily asked.

“Almost seven. I have to hurry to meet Mindy. I’ll see you tonight.”

Mom’s hand made its way out from under the comforter and grasped mine.

“Remember to call me when you get home,” she reminded me.

“Of course Mother. I Love you.”

“Love you too, Sweety.”
 

*          *          *
 
I rushed to the bus stop and almost missed the bus. It was early for the first time in recorded history! Ten minutes later I was at Mindy’s front door.

Mindy opened the front door to her house before I could even knock!

“Hurry, you have to take a shower!” she emphasized as she pulled me into her house.

“How did you know I was here?” I whispered back.

“I was watching for you! I didn’t want you to wake my Mom and Dad. Wear the clear plastic shower cap hanging above the towel rack while you shower to keep your hair dry — it’s mine. They are going to do your hair at the salon so don’t wash it. And don’t forget to shave your legs and underarms. Those are going to be on display today with your dress.”

I paused as I knew she had two bathrooms, one down here and one upstairs. I hoped she didn’t mean the upstairs one. That one’s too close to her parent’s room!

Mindy pointed to the one down the hall behind me. “Scoot! I’ll bring your clothes in to you.”

You know what? Mindy is going to make an awesome mother someday. She has all the hallmarks of a good one already.

I turned around and couldn’t help myself! I retorted to her in a high pitched childlike voice, “Yes Mommy!”

Mindy smacked my behind.

I scooted!
 

*          *          *
 
I showered like Mindy had said to do. My legs really didn’t need to be shaved - my hair was not growing back fast at all. It was very thin, fine and short. Certainly not like other boys or men had! They can keep all that hair! I like mine being the way it is. I shaved my legs anyways. If nothing else, it made me feel more like a girl.

“Here are your clothes Lynn. You are using my yellow camisole top with denim shorts. I know you don’t have a wide choice of girl clothing, so it’ll be fine. You’ll be changing out of these after the salon. I’ll be bringing your dress with you and helping you with the makeup.”

I peeked from around the curtain.

“Finish up Miss Slowpoke. We have about 20 minutes to be at the bus stop.”

I stuck my tongue out at Mindy and pulled the curtain back closed.
 

*          *          *
 
I exited the shower and dried myself off. The most gorgeous panties were waiting for me on the toilet lid. They were red and almost pure lace. I know this is meant for an adult woman; they were certainly a bit much for a girl my age. But Mindy had gotten it for me at Victoria’s Secret last week. It was a velvety fabric cut so it dipped down low in the middle where it had just enough fabric to cover my most intimate spot and curved up high to the band as it hugged me below the navel. The label said Bikini cut.

I pushed myself up inside in between my legs and found myself blushing as I pulled the panties up slowly onto me. I loved how they felt!

“Are you ready yet?” Mindy asked from behind me.

Mindy had chosen that precise moment to enter the bathroom. I turned around, facing her. Mindy’s eyes just zeroed in on my panties.

“Lynn,” Mindy started with a startled expression. “Are you sure you aren’t a girl?”

I lowered my head, somewhat embarrassed. I could see that I looked pretty much like a girl where it counted down there, but it was only the looks from the way that I shoved my bits up inside me. I was really a far cry from being a girl.

“Mindy,” I sighed. “I’m a boy.”

Her expression was more of concern. “Well, most boys cannot do what you do with that. It’s not normal.”

“You’ve seen me do this before Min.”

Mindy gave me the eye again. I knew she wasn’t going to back off this issue without saying her piece. What choice did I have? I let her.

“I seriously think you should see a doctor about that Lynn. At least get an opinion. I do care about you.”

Geez! It didn’t hurt me. Why did I need a doctor?

“I’m fine Mindy.” I was a little blustered. I just wanted to drop this issue. I’d really rather have what Mindy has between her legs than what I had. All I was able to do was give the appearance that I looked similar to her down there. I wasn’t really like her down there though. What would it feel like to be a real girl?

*sigh*

“I’m sorry Lynn.” Mindy pulled me into a hug. “I’m just concerned about you. Don’t you dare think I’m making fun of you!”

I know she didn’t. It’s just… with everything that is going on… it’s scaring me! I just wanted to be myself, whatever that might be.

I stifled my reflex for getting the waterworks to flow out of my eyes.

“Okay Mindy. If it will make you feel better, I’ll ask my Mother to make an appointment for me next week. That is, assuming, I’m still her child.”

“Oh Lynn!” She gave me a look of pittance. “Please trust me? She is not going to get rid of you.”

“But what is she going to with me when she talks to Miss Benson? I mean, I am waiting until Sunday to tell her about that.”

Mindy quietly answered. “I don’t know Lynn.”

She squeezed my hand reassuringly.

“I’m scared.”

“I would be too. I’m going to be there for you.”
 

*          *          *
 
I was lost in thought for a moment as Mindy prodded me to lay down so that she could put my breast forms on.

“Mindy wait a second, please. These panties… why did you get them for me? Aren’t they a little… too ‘grown up’ for me?”

I realized then that I was still standing there in only those panties. Mindy has seen me like this before, so it’s no big deal.

“Lynn, they are supposed to be. They are supposed to make you feel more sexy, more adult, and more of a woman. It will help you to stay in that frame of mind while you act out the part of being a Princess today. Remember, the prettier you feel from underneath your dress — from the inside, the prettier you will shine on the outside.”

Well, I did want to do my best. I think I did fairly well this week in school so far. I’m really starting to get attention. I have friends now, and I thought that was impossible! Girls talk to me now, and the boys. Yeah! They never seem to leave me alone. That was an entirely new experience for me, being treated differently, more respectful by them. Yes… even desired by them.

Before, boys used to tease me or else ignore me all together. Then, when I changed my clothing and came to school dressed as a girl, everyone seemed to think I had always been one. They assumed I had been a girl trying to portray being a boy! Now, that I am on the other side of the fence in their eyes, and appearing to them as a girl, I guess they would start to see me as a different person entirely. It’s very stressful to keep trying to turn the conversation away from their wanting to express their feelings about me and wanting to date me to something more mundane that I would like to talk about. I mean, I’m only fourteen! My Mother won’t let me date yet until I’m 16. And I’m going to do as she says.

I want her proud of me.

“Umm, okay.”

“Let’s hurry girl, we are running out of time.” Mindy grabbed some towels and laid them down on the bathroom floor to provide a temporary mat of sorts.

“Okay, now lay down. I have to glue your breasts on. I need to use more glue than we had been using because we can’t take a chance that they might come loose and fall out.”

Yikes! I tried to hide that image from my mind. That would be like, so embarrassing - and a disaster!

“Will we still be able to remove them?”

“It might be a little more difficult, but we can get them off. I can’t have you going home with breasts. Your mother would blow a gasket!” Yes, I believe she would!
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy rubbed the glue all over the back of the forms and held them on my chest until they were set. She then blended the line between my chest and the forms with some sort of elastic makeup stuff she mixed from some tubes to get the right coloration of my skin tone. Where did she get this stuff from?

When she was done, and I stood up admiring her handiwork, they almost looked completely real — my own breasts! They would never survive an up close inspection, but, covered and a casual glance, I doubted that anyone would notice anything amiss.

The first time I had worn these forms, they were a pain in the butt! But now, I really miss not having them on me after they have been removed. I sort of wished that they could be real. I glanced in the mirror at them and bounced on my heels a little and watched them jiggle. I watched a pleased grin pass across my face. Mindy, noticing what I was doing, shoved a bra that matched my panties to me. I knew that upset her just slightly, so I stopped and put the bra on. The bra, oohhh! It was so silky! When I held it in my hands and felt the softness of the material, it felt like it was flowing! I wondered what it would feel like against real breasts - my own?

I imagined the softness of the bra caressing my own nipples as it held me in securely.

“Lynn, stop daydreaming and put your bra on. It’s getting late.”

“Okay,” I mumbled.

Now I knew why girls spent so much time in the bathroom alone at home. You would never have the time to enjoy being a girl if your girl friend was right there beside you to spoil the fun!

Mindy started to giggle.

“Huh?” I had spun the bra back around and already had my right arm through the shoulder strap. “What’s so funny?”

“You. I remember the first time I wore a bra like that. I remember how it made me feel.”

I had finished putting my left arm through the other strap. I was snugging up my forms into the cups more comfortably.

“I must admit, it really does feel good.”

“It’s supposed to. That’s the reason they make bras like that, for girls to feel special. Just don’t get too cozy with it though. It’s only for tonight.”

I hoped not. I liked this feel.

I stared at myself in the mirror again. Try as I might, I couldn’t find a boy anymore in the vision before me.
 

*          *          *
 
I felt a tug at my arm, and Mindy was slipping the camisole top onto me. I joined in helping her put it on. I then slipped into the shorts and then zipped them up.

“Put just a little bit of makeup on because they’re going to remove it when you get there anyways.”

I deftly applied a touch of lipstick and some eye shadow again, as I had been doing for almost a week now, and was satisfied with how I looked.

“You are a quick learner Lynn!” Mindy praised my effort at doing my own makeup.

I smiled.

Mindy then handed me a pair of her white running shoes with pink side bands inlaid on the leather for my feet, since heels were not necessary for the salon trip. I did not want to risk ruining them before Homecoming even began!

Finally, Mindy pulled my hair into a ponytail, except it was a little higher on my head.

“You can change into your dress after the salon. Miss Benson wants us to do it at her office. After the dance, you can come back here to change. My mom thinks you’re a girl named Linda already, so my parents won’t be a problem for that short period of time. Go ahead and leave your boy clothes here, because you won’t need them until after the dance.”

Mindy then hid my boy clothes inside her dresser underneath her clothes.

“Okay. I guess I’m ready.” I took a deep breath.

We both quietly made it out of the house without having disturbed her parents and walked across her lawn to the bus stop and waited for my trip into femininity.
 

*          *          *
 
“I envy you Lynn. I’ve always wanted to have my very own make-over, but Mom says we can’t afford it for me.”

“Are they expensive?”

“Yes they are! Especially at the spa where you’ll be going!”

“My haircuts used to cost like maybe fifteen dollars. Is it more than that?” I asked innocently.

Mindy started laughing again. “It costs like 3 and half times what all your clothes we got for you that day we shopped for you last week.”

Gulp!
 

*          *          *
 
A green Dodge Caravan pulled up alongside the curb in front of us. The window rolled down. An attractive woman, about the same age as my mother, greeted us.

“Hi, and you must be… Lynn Collins?”

“Yes, how did you know?”

“I was guessing… and because you don’t look a day over fourteen! No, Really, I’m Brenda Worthington from Styles Spa. Gloria Benson from Central High School hired us to take you to our Spa for your makeover. A limousine will pick everyone up from our salon at 2 pm to take all of you back to your school to change into your dresses and do your photo shoot there. Then they will give you further instructions on what all of you are supposed to do.”

“Oh,” was my muted response.

She had clicked the door lock to open it. I pulled open the door and let Mindy slide into the far seat first in the back. I then sat down, smoothing out my skirt before finally seating myself. Then, I pulled the door shut. And we were on our way.
 

*          *          *
 
“Lynn the driver here is Lisa. She will be driving you back to your school when we are done.”

“Miss Worthington, this is my best friend in the whole world — Mindy Swanson.”

Brenda turned around in her seat and gently shook Mindy’s hand. “Pleased to meet you Mindy.”

Mindy smiled and replied, “I’m pleased to meet you too.”

“Lynn, I just wanted to add that I think you are going to be, by far, the most beautiful girl there at your Homecoming! You have me wishing I could be as pretty as you are.”

My face just reddened with embarrassment. Was I really that beautiful? Or is this just the way girls communicate by just saying things like that to get your attention. Whatever it was… I liked it!

“I hope you will enjoy your visit to our salon. Our whole staff looks forward to these makeovers every year, because it’s fun to start with a beautiful woman and try to improve what she already has. I won’t be working on you directly, but I will instruct the girls to do the best possible job for you. Hopefully you’ll want to return in the future before one of your special dates with your boyfriend.”

My face went even redder. Mindy kept glancing at me wondering why I was so embarrassed. I wondered if Rex would like my makeover?
 

*          *          *
 
We soon pulled up in front a relatively new looking store called ‘Styles Spa’. This is the right place alright. The outlines of women’s faces, lipstick bottles and hair styles along the front glass window panes impressed me. The neon store lettering above the front doors seemed to greet us with enthusiasm. Brenda led us in.

The smells of various chemicals, the sight of the different stations for doing various things at and the newness scent that permeated the entire salon overwhelmed me.

Wow!

“Come with me Lynn. You’ll need to change into a smock so we don’t ruin your clothes. Have you ever been to a salon before?”

“No ma’am,” I politely replied.

“I didn’t think so. Your hair needs some loving care.” She teased a few strands of my hair, observing the ends of them. “Don’t worry. When we’re done with you, you won’t even recognize yourself.”

That’s exactly what I was afraid of! If I won’t recognize myself, how will my mother?

I entered their changing room and removed my blouse. I glanced in the mirror they had hanging on the back of the door at my chest and knew that if anyone were to see my breasts, I was going to be toast! They really wouldn’t fool anyone. The seams had been cleverly hidden with makeup, but the color of the forms was somewhat off from my own skin color. Thankfully, my dress wouldn’t be showing any cleavage. And neither did this smock it seems. Good!

I put on the smock and tied it tight.
 

*          *          *
 
I exited the room and found a different woman, in her twenties, waiting for me.

“Hi, you must be Lynn! I’m Sondra and I’ll be coordinating your experience today. Brenda left you in my care for the moment. I’ll be doing your hair and you’ll be meeting a different girl for each stage of your makeover.”

“It’s nice to meet you Sondra,” I said, as I extended my hand. We shook gently.

“Are you ready for your total experience?” Sondra warmly smiled at me.

“Yes ma’am. I think so.”

I was definitely intrigued by all of this stuff. As a boy, I never did much for my appearance. But girls, geez!, They go through a heck of a lot for their appearance! That was a recurring theme Mindy kept impressing upon me. I guess now I can see why. Beauty is not easy!

I couldn’t wait to see what they were going to do to me!

Sondra led me to a wash station and proceeded to wash and condition my hair. When she was finished she wrapped my hair in a towel and brought me back to her station.

“So, Lynn, do you have any ideas as to what you would like?” she asked.

Well, of course I did. I had been studying hair fashion magazines all of my life. Even when I didn’t know I had wanted to be a girl, I knew I loved a lot of the hair styles I saw in those magazines and daydreamed of wearing them. That had been the impetus for me to grow my hair long. There were some styles that I really liked a lot. The trouble was, I liked them all equally! I couldn’t decide! So, I thought it would be best for Sondra to make that decision for me.

“I am sorry Ma’am. I thought that maybe you might have some ideas,” I offered, “I’ll trust your judgment. All that I would like for is to be able to have a ponytail like I do now, after you’re done.”

Hopefully, I’ll look somewhat normal for me at least when this is over with.

Sondra removed my towel and framed my face with my wet hair. She held up the back, all the while she had a quizzical expression about her face as she studied my face and the possibilities. Her expression suddenly changed from one of those ‘I was looking all over the store’ to a ‘I just found what I was looking for’ smiles.

“I know just the thing! It will be perfect for you, and you’ll be able to pull it back into a ponytail later if you like. But I doubt that you will want to,” she cheerily said.

I looked around to ask Mindy what I should do - but she was gone! Oh no!

“Miss - I mean Sondra? Do you know where my friend Mindy is?” I asked, definitely not wanting to make such a serious decision on my own.

“Was she that girl slightly taller than you, brown hair, brown eyes, violet top with some sunflowers on them, and size 10 jeans?”

Omigosh!! She detailed Mindy to a T! Were all women this observant?

“Yes ma’am. That’s her.”

Sondra stated, “Lisa had to drive her back to her house. She forgot to bring your dress and shoes for your Homecoming.”

Oh God! What should I do?

“She’ll be back soon,” Sondra reassured me as she was looking through a cabinet for some bottles.

I can’t stall you until then, can I?

Sondra set the bottles down on the counter top behind me and waited for me.

I had no idea which hairstyle of the ones I liked I would want most. And Sondra is indirectly asking me if I wanted her to proceed. I have to give her some kind of answer without looking too much like a dork.

I bit my lower lip and nervously said, “Okay Sondra, I’m sure whatever you do will be just fine.”

I truly hoped so!

I squinted my eyes as Sondra began her work.
 

*          *          *
 
“Well Lynn, In order to do what I have in mind, I am going to have to trim some of your hair to make it work. I have to rim it a bit and then I’m going to color it with an accent highlight coloring.”

Color? Oh No! I was not going to be rude and say no. After all, I had just given her permission to do what she felt was best. Fudge! Fudge!

Sondra took some shears in hand and pulled down on the hair on the front of my head.

Snip!

I heard the scissors snap shut. I expected to see a small amount of hair fall down in front of my eyes. But when the huge clump of hair that I saw fall past my vision, I gasped!

“I’m giving you some bangs for this style,” Sondra informed me as she kept right on trimming.

Bangs? Holy crap, I’m dead! Forget Monday! After the Homecoming Dance tonight, I was going to be like totally gone! What was I going to do? There was absolutely no turning back now! Oh my God! The damage had just been done! Why couldn’t I have just said no?

Sondra continued to snip and cut all around my head.

Sometime during the process, my head quit flinching with each snip, as I had slid into an eerie calmness. You know, sort of like the way a condemned man would feel before being executed?

Yeah, just like that.
 

*          *          *
 
When she finished, she fluffed my still wet hair with her hands. Her smile couldn’t have been more proud.

“Now I’m going to give you some color.”

Sondra dried her hands on a towel and then brought out a stack of color strips on a large metal loop. The strips had various shades colors on each strip. She compared some to my hair and then asked me which color seemed to contrast best to my hair by showing me the specific block of color on the few strips she had selected.

I was so nervous I really felt like I needed to use the girl’s room!

I gulped, and pointed to a light shade of a red-brown color on the first strip to blend in with my hair.

Sondra then consulted a thick book lying on top of her counter before she started to mix and test the liquids she was going to color my hair with. It wasn’t long before she applied the coloring to my hair. She took small groupings of my hair and wrapped them with foil to keep them separated.

About what I thought was a half an hour later, Sondra started cleaning up her counter.

“Well, we are all done for now, Lynn. I’m going to set the timer for 15 minutes. When it dings, I’ll remove the foil and rinse out the coloring agent. Just lay back and relax. I’ll be back over when it dings, don’t worry”

“Thank you very much Sondra. I appreciate your efforts on me.” I complimented her. Never insult the chef cooking your food! Or in this case, the beautician.

“It’s a real pleasure to work with you Miss Collins. I’m sure you are going to love my creation. See you in a few minutes!” Sondra then walked on across the store to the back through a curtain.

It’s already too late to hide what had been done to me. There was really no point in worrying about hiding this anymore. The damage has been done. And I’m sure some more is soon to follow.

This is what is expected of me I kept thinking to myself.

I just let go mentally, and lay there.

Sondra was tapping my shoulder. I stirred.

“Taking a nap?” Sondra grinned at me. Woah! I didn’t even hear the timer go off!

Sondra leaned the chair back further so that my hair was hanging back over her sink. She began to unwrap the foil and started rinsing my hair out of that not-so-nice smelling liquid.

I felt some more tugging at my hair and glance back in the mirror. She was putting some rollers in my hair and spraying a solution over the hair as she rolled it. I think I had heard her say something about permanent, but I wasn’t paying much attention.

She soon finished rolling my hair and led me to a line of hair driers. These are not the portable ones you dry your hair with, like the type Mom uses. These are huge bowl shaped ones on some kind of metal arm that lowers over your head!

Sondra seated me next to the other girls going through the same treatment as me.

I was half-expecting them to turn and look towards me and scream ‘It’s a Boy! What on earth are you doing in here with us? And why are you trying to be a Princess?” Well, realistically, I had been going to school now for almost a week dressed as girl, and no one cared. Everyone assumed that I was a girl already. But I sure felt those girls might do it! I was that scared!

I glanced over at them and noticed that they were all reading magazines. So I did as the natives do - I leaned over and grabbed one on teen girl fashion and began to read.

Boy this hot air is making me sweat!

Two magazines later, Sondra came back over and shut my dryer off.

“Ok Miss Collins, let’s head back over to my station and I’ll finish up your hair.”
 

*          *          *
 
I leaned back and felt Sondra removing the roller one at a time. Then I felt a brush start stroking what I felt were the tight inward curls of my hair at the ends. I saw her go around me, looking me over and combing and brushing certain parts of my hair until she was finally pleased.

“Here,” she was saying as she adjusted a lever below the seat, “Lets spin you around so that you can see my masterpiece!”

Oh God, I’m too scared to look! I closed my eyes tight!

Sondra then spun the chair around. I heard silence for a few moments.

“Oh Lynn! There is nothing to be afraid of honey! Look. I promise you. Open your eyes! You’re absolutely beautiful!”

I slowly opened my eyes. I was totally unprepared for what I saw!

I saw a gorgeous feminine creature staring back at me in the mirror! My mouth opened wide but no words came out. That girl in the mirror was a girl men would fight over to have! She oozed sensuality! She was every boy’s dream!

And that girl was me!

It was then that I noticed my hair - how beautifully styled it was! The bangs I was so concerned about flowed softly across my forehead and curled under just above my eyes. The rest of my hair fell in a loose inward curl angled down below my shoulders in the back. I could see that she had actually cut the innermost layers of my hair shorter inside and they were progressively longer as it was layered to the outside — making the cut on a downward angle at a diagonal from the inside to the outside of my hair as it curled on around and over my shoulders. I reached up to touch it and found it was flexible and stayed relatively in shape as I moved it some and let go. It bounced! This is a good thing!

“Thank you so much Sondra! I’m... speechless! This is just wonderful! I love it!” I gushed.

Sondra beamed a warm smile, pleased that I actually loved what she had done.

“I’m very glad you like it Lynn. It’s you! I’ll go get Rachael and she will be doing your eyebrows.”

My eyebrows? Didn't Mindy just do them a few days ago?
 

*          *          *
 
Sondra returned with another woman who seemed be slightly younger than herself. I would guess 18-19 years old?

“Lynn, this is Rachael. She’s the best makeup person we have. She’s going to make you even more beautiful,” Sondra said, and then walked away.

“Hi Lynn! It’s nice to meet you. My, you’re very pretty already!”

I blushed again. I just can’t help it anymore! It’s become an instinctual reaction to whenever someone mentions how nice I look. This was all still so new to me!

“Thank you very much.”

Rachael replied, “And such a polite girl too! Let me look over your brows first.”

I could see a mixture of expressions as she looked over my brows and ran her fingernail through them some. I didn’t like that last expression I saw on her face though.

“Ooh, who did your brows?” she asked.

“My friend Mindy,” I replied.

“She left them a little uneven, but don’t you worry. I can fix anything.”
 

*          *          *
 
Rachael took a pair of tweezers in her hand and proceeded to even my brows. I didn’t know they were so uneven. I thought Mindy had done a fine job, myself. I guess it shows there is still a lot to learn about making one’s self more beautiful.

I flinched with each hair that was pulled.

She finished and held up a hand mirror for me to see the artistry which she had performed.

“There you go, beautiful aren’t they?” she asked me proudly.

Oh My God! What has she done to me? My eyebrows were definitely even alright, each side match the other perfectly! There was just one little problem though… there were hardly any brows left! And what was left… screamed GIRL! I was beyond scared! I am so screwed when Mom sees this!

Rachael was waiting for my reaction to her hard work. I guess it would be in bad taste to tell her that what she had done was sign my death warrant.

“They’re beautiful Rachael,” I said. Inside my head, I was sobbing! I was screwed! So screwed! I really couldn’t even predict how mad Mom was going to be when she saw me tonight!

“I’m so glad you like my work! Before I start on your makeup, Let me take you over to Judy and let her do your nails.”

“My nails?”

“Yes. You’re having a total makeover, and that means hair, nails, and makeup - the whole works! We’ve just started!”
 

*          *          *
 
I let that inner sense of calmness take over and saturate my insides as we walked over to where Judy was. Rachael had me sit on a chair in front of her nail table. Various small bottles of colors and clear stuff were all around her and there were brushes, a scrubby pad, some nail files and a hobby pen drill with some metal bit in it.

“Hi sweetie, I’m Judy. Which Princess are you?” she asked.

“I’m from the freshman class,” I responded.

“Well, just between you and me, you are the prettiest girl that I have seen come in here for quite some time.”

Another blush rose on my face.

“Thank you.” I demurely responded.

“Is there any special color that you’d like for me to do for you?” she asked.

I glanced around her at the rows and rows of colorful nail polish bottles. I didn’t have a clue as to what color I wanted my nails painted. In fact, I had never painted them. Mindy had done mine a couple of times for me. But she had decided the color, not me. This would be my first.

“Umm… I really can’t decide” I admitted. “Would you mind very much if you were to pick out the color for me? Please?”

Judy gave me a look like she had just found a lost soul. After tonight, I probably was going to be one anyways, so it was fitting.

“Well, since you’re going to a special school dance, we should make sure your nails look very good. How about this? What color is your dress?” she asked me.

“Red.”

“What color of red? Burgundy, light red, red, or an orange red? There are lots of reds.”

Why did this have to be so complicated? I didn’t know what color of red my dress was until I remembered my panties and bra. They matched the dress! But I didn’t want to remove my smock and show everyone my body. Especially my breast forms!

“It’s the same red as my panties,” I said, blushing furiously.

“Ok sweety, let me see part of it.”

I pulled the side of my smock up and my shorts down far enough to expose the red band that hugged my hips. Judy held a similar color strip chart next to the band.

“Okay honey,you can cover yourself up again. I have the color,” she giggled. “Now let me see what I have to work with.”

She took my lithe delicate hands into hers and shook her head.

“What in the world did you do to your nails? You have none!”

“I have to keep them trimmed for water polo,” I replied. I did, but that was in the past! My nails, I kept them trimmed low with clippers and very evenly.

“Well, these won’t do hon. I’ll have to give you extensions. How long would you like them?”

Why is everyone asking me what I’d like? I can’t make decisions like this! Why did Mindy have to leave? She would know how long they should be. How in the world am I supposed to know this stuff?

“I’m not sure?” I answered truthfully.

“Okay. Do you want to go overboard with really long ones? Medium length ones? Or short ones longer than what you have now?

“Umm, Judy? Would you be able to show me the lengths somehow? I think that might help me to make a better decision?”

“Sure, here,” Judy giggled as she pulled out a tray of plastic nail extensions and She demonstrated each by taking the extension and sliding it slowly out along the top of my finger to show how much would be sticking out over the fingertip. I finally saw what I felt was appropriate, about a quarter of an inch long.

“A quarter of an inch would be very nice.”

Judy smiled and went right to work: first on the extensions she glued to each fingertip and snipping them down roughly to size. She then painted a gel filling in over top, then sanded, filed, and finally buffed. She gave my fingertips a very girlish oval type curve. Wow! I loved that a lot!

I never realized how much work nice nails were! She gave me the color and then a clear coat to protect the color. She must have given me five coats of paint! I’ll have to protect them with my life! Now I know why girls get so upset when they break a nail. I found my hands placed in some kind of UV light box. Judy said that would harden the nails. That’s a lot of work for just fingernails!

She then proceeded to shape and polish my toenails while my fingernails were stuck in this light box thingy. I soon was able to wiggle my toes and peer down to see them. I saw perfectly oval shaped red nails on them as well!

“Do you approve Lynn?” she asked me after she had opened the light box so I could remove my hands. I wiggled my fingers and was still trying to get used to the new feel of longer nails. I couldn’t take my eyes off of them! They looked really great!

“Yes ma’am. Very much! It’s the best I have ever had done!” Well, that was the truth also! This is the first time I had ever gotten nail extensions. Sure made my ability to grab things with my fingers very different!
 

*          *          *
 
Rachael had come back over beside me and asked, “Are you ready for your makeup now, Lynn?”

Does this stuff ever really end?

“Yes ma’am. I am”

“Come back over this way to my chair and I’ll finish you up!”

Rachael deliberately had the chair facing away from the wall mirror behind it so that I couldn’t see what was going on while she was applied the makeup.

Rachael went to work on my face.

Don’t ask me what she did because I didn’t have a clue! She tried to explain every move, but it was like trying to explain what the Golden Gate Bridge looks like in a foreign language. I knew something of what she was telling me, I just didn’t understand it all.
 

*          *          *
 
I heard Rachel snap a plastic makeup case closed and said, “You, my dear, are done! Now to unveil you to yourself!”

Rachel spun the barbershop-like chair around and I looked into the mirror.

“You like it?” she asked.

Did I like it? I loved it! If I thought I was beautiful before, I was a goddess now! I was totally gorgeous! Rachael was a true artist! I looked at my reflection in the mirror and saw the prettiest girl on earth!

Omigosh! This is who I was meant to be! Yes! YES!! YES!!! This… This was my true self!

My excitement grew.

I was now savoring and relishing in this knowledge to its fullest! If I was going to die, then this was worth it!

My excitement started to grow.

I, Lynn Collins, freshman Homecoming Princess of Central High, felt truly alive for the first time in my entire life! I owed Mindy so much - more than she knew what she had done for me!

I found myself!
 

*          *          *
 
“I see you like what we did for you,” Sondra stated.

“Oh my gosh! Yes ma’am! It’s… Sondra, I didn’t know this was possible!”

“Sweetheart, we had a lot to work with. All we did was highlight what you already had. You’re a beautiful woman, Lynn.”

I felt as though I was walking on a cloud! I looked at the clock and realized that I had been here for more than five hours!! I saw Mindy sitting in the reception area. She looked up as I approached her.

When she saw me she gasped.

I had hoped her face would have a look of happiness because of how I looked, but what her face showed was total sheer panic!

“Oh my God! Lynn!!! What have you done?” she gasped. The panic on her face came through in her voice.

“Don’t you like it?” I asked innocently. I really wanted Mindy to appreciate how beautiful I now looked and to share that emotion with me.

“What were you thinking? How do you think you’re going to hide your brows, and do you think a ponytail is going to change the look of your hairstyle? Bangs don’t just go away,” Mindy exasperated in a hushed tone of voice I didn’t like.

“But you left me! I-I-I d-didn’t know what else to do!” I whined.

“Oh Lynn… I’m so sorry! I forgot that you aren’t a girl, and don’t know anything about being a girl. I shouldn’t have left you by yourself! I didn’t know they would make you so gorgeous!”

Well, there went my feeling of beauty. Panic took over and threw her right out the window!

“What are we going to do now? Can we fix this at your house after the dance?” I begged, as panic showed in my voice.

“I don’t know sweety. I’ll think of something. I did go back to get your dress and heels. They are in Miss Benson's office.”

Mindy was lost in thought for a minute and then faced me.

“Lynn, look. This is your day. Be a Princess and enjoy it. This will never happen again! So whatever comes later, comes. Just shine as the beautiful Princess that you are tonight! Everything will be okay. Lynn… I love you to pieces!”

Mindy gently hugged me and I was now worried. If she was almost in tears about this, I..I-I .. I’m really deep in it! Maybe Mom would find a way to chase me after I had died and left my body?

Mindy looked back up into my eyes, seeing the fear showing on my face.

“I won’t let anything happen to you Lynn.”
 

*          *          *
 
I already realized that I had allowed things to happen to me that I shouldn’t have.

I felt very sick!

What was I going to say to my Mother? Try as I may, I won’t be able to hide my now new feminine look! Fudge it all! I hope Mindy will be able to salvage something of my life. She’s the only anchor I have!

Wait a minute! There was one other thing that might save me!
 

*          *          *
 
I walked back over to Sondra.

“Sondra, do you remember when I asked you to make sure if I could still have a ponytail if I wanted?”

“Of course dear! I didn’t forget,” she replied, with confidence overflowing in her voice.

Sondra faced me to the wall mirror, took my hair into her hands and held it up at the appropriate height for a girl’s ponytail, pulling it slightly. It looked great! Except it looked great on a girl! Not a boy! And I looked like an even younger girl with it pulled up into a ponytail like that! Mindy was right, bangs didn’t just go away! They emphasized more girl into one’s looks. I couldn’t go back to being a boy now!

“Well, what do you think?” Sondra asked proudly.

What could I say? Sondra, you screwed up? She had done a wonderful job with my hair.

“I love it Sondra,” I meekly answered.

I did love it! I truly did! I felt so mixed right now. I loved all this pampering and the new me I found. I had become the girl I was meant to be!

But what about Mom?

How am I going to explain this to her? And what about school? And Mom’s meeting with Miss Benson Monday?

How am I going to explain to my Mother that I’m a girl now?

I won the Homecoming Princess contest fair and square — well… maybe not. But what’s so wrong with a very beautiful boy winning the contest? Even one that acted more a girl than most of the real girls that he saw in school? I won, and I don’t think anyone else besides Miss Benson and Mindy even know that I am a boy.

But does that matter?

I wanted to cry!!!

I knew that if I did that all of the hard work Rachael had done for me would have been for naught!

I did the only thing I could do. I simply gave up! I pushed all of my worries and dark thoughts into the furthest corner of my brain!

Brenda Worthington opened the front door of the salon from outside. I could see a huge elongated black car parked there behind her! It was amazing!

“Girls! We have to return you to your school so you can put on your dresses and have your pictures taken. The limousine is waiting outside for you. Grab your things.” Brenda said.

I became Lynn, the smiling Princess!

---

 
To Be Continued...

 
“Mindy. Look. You’re not making any sense to me. I’m not damaged. And what would be so wrong if I really was a girl?” I asked.

“You were born a boy, that’s what’s wrong!”

I had to respond to that!

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
We gathered our belongings and followed each other out to the limousine. I was on a new high! I couldn’t stop from smiling - I was feeling so wonderful. This was going to be my night and I was going to live it to its fullest!

I quickly hugged Mindy.

“I’ll see you at the school Min! I feel so alive!”

Mindy, slowly widened her eyes, “Okay Lynn… Enjoy today. I-I’ll see you there.” She was looking at me strangely, almost as if I were a different person! Nonsense! I pushed that thought aside and absorbed the positive energy from the rest of girls of the Homecoming Court.

Melissa Townsend, the Queen of the Court, led the procession to enter that luxurious vehicle! She had been here before as a Princess, so as the winner of the senior class, she had experience and was twice a winner. The rest of us were new at this. The junior class girl, Tina Weeks, was a transfer from another school. She was also drop dead gorgeous! The sophomore, Carla Stanton, had just missed being princess the year before, but the girl that beat her had transferred to another school… and that left, just me. As my luck would have it (all of it bad) and my proclivity to prank had left me in this position: I was Princess of the freshman class.

I had managed to climb into the limousine and sit next to Tina in the rear. Feeling a little out of my environment, I decided to keep my mouth closed as much as possible, hold my knees together, and just be happy. Melissa, Carla, and Tina started chattering away.

The limo pulled away from the curb and our procession was rolling.

Mindy was being driven by Brenda to follow behind us from what I had seen because this car was for the homecoming court and no one else. A part of me felt guilty for her not being here, but I understood the rules and tradition.
 

*          *          *
 
“Did you see the bulge in Kevin Garble’s football uniform last week?” Melissa asked. Omigod! I’m looking away and trying not to hear this!

“Mmm, how could you miss it?” Tina cattily affirmed.

“What?” Carla Stanton questioned. Carla was the Princess from the sophomore class. Being new, she didn’t know what a hunk Kevin was. He plays on our school’s football team. Yeah, He is rugged, strong, and, well, I guess, almost a man. I didn’t have an opinion on him really as I just barely knew him. This is a conversation I thought it best to stay out of. I mean, Rex was my only sexual experience and all that happened was that we kissed. Ok. So we did a little bit more than kiss in that theater. But still, I’m not quite ready for that sort of talk yet, you know?

“What do you think Lynn?” Melissa asked me. Startled, I came back to reality as I looked over at her. “Wouldn’t you love to wrap your hand around that massive meat?”

My face exploded in redness as I lowered my eyes to the floor, totally embarrassed!!!! I mean, how could she ask such a question??? And more importantly, how could I answer it??

Tina, watching my reaction, warned, “Leave her alone Melissa. You know she’s just a kid.”

“But how could you miss it?” Melissa asked.

“God Melissa! Not every girl wants to jump a hot guy they see,” Tina retorted.

“Tina! You are making me sound like a slut! I’m just saying… I wouldn’t kick Kevin out of bed for not being a neat freak.”

“I see your point.”

The girls had a giggling fit after that. I sort of joined with them in the laughing, trying not to appear too out of place. But, that is just not an area of talk I wanted to go in.

“What about you Lynn, do you have a boyfriend?” Melissa asked.

Does this ever stop? This girl keeps targeting me to find out more about me. Ok, I’ll answer as truthful as possible. But I will not offer extra information.

“Kind of,” I replied.

“Really, what’s his name?”

“Rex.”

“Is he hung?” Melissa asked and started the other girls breaking out in a giggle fit again.

“Uh, I… don’t know?”

“Ooo, you’re a virgin, aren’t you?” Melissa teased me.

I felt my face go red again. What’s wrong with being a virgin? It’s not like I have had the time or opportunity to date boys. And besides, I still have the issue of being myself and I’m only fourteen too. I met up with Rex during a shopping trip with Mindy. Ok, I spent one evening with him in a theater kissing and holding - but that’s all I had done.

“Ok, leave her alone Melissa. I’m a virgin too. There’s nothing wrong with that. Maybe there is something wrong with not being one?” Tina spat.

Wow! Tina had just put Melissa in her place! Girls can be just as cruel and vindictive as boys can at teasing and fighting! Now, I just looked over to Melissa and wondered how she would handle Tina’s response.

“Tina, you know I’m just kidding! Everybody knows how I feel for Kevin. I want to impale myself on him soooooooooo baaaaad!” Melissa laughed.

Ummm Yeah! Let’s just not think of that gross stuff?

The conversation seemed to lighten up a bit after that. Melissa did not respond to it in the way that I had expected. Boys would normally stand their ground and challenge for something said like that. But this was different. Melissa deflected it with ease. It seems there is a lot to being a girl with the way in which they… no, we... talk. It’s a social skill I sadly lack in and one that I will need to pick up on soon!

We talked more about school and having boyfriends, but none of that smut Melissa had spawned.
 

*          *          *
 
By the time we arrived at school, I had sort of bonded with them and was seen just as I was portraying. And I’m not actually portraying anymore either. I am a girl. Lynn the prankster was gone! I could be me and be accepted without acting like a fool. For me, being a girl, not only felt right, but it had a different set of rules I had to be under for social acceptance which I found to be easier because I was accepted for being a girl without having to prove I was someone, like back when I was trying to be a boy.

Trying to be. I didn’t succeed.

Even if that was not the case, I am thoroughly happy with what I am now and living it.
 

*          *          *
 
We exited the car giggling from our — conversation. I think I was giggling more than the others!

Girl talk — whew! It’s really different! And I mean it’s different from how I talk with Mindy too! It’s like a give and take session and we take turns. It’s more emotional (which pulled me in like a bee to honey) and more enthralling to me than how boys talked. I felt useful as a person participating with them in this sort of talk and it made me feel special as we had bonded during the ride.

It’s a closeness that boys don’t understand. Yes, I can see and feel the difference too.

I remember cutting up with my friends, and pulling off some pretty cruel pranks. But, as boys, when the pranks were over, we pretty much went our own way. We would talk about how much fun they had been, but there just wasn’t this closeness that girls felt towards one another. I know that both girls and boys have a different way of talking and behaving and yet, both sexes do some things similarly. Both brag, both fight, both tease, and both act up. Yet the way girls go about things is really different from boys. It’s much less antagonistic and less bullying. It’s much softer, more caring and more emotional. It’s a way of being! And… It’s ME! This girl talk, which I had pretty much been excluded from my entire life, was something very fulfilling towards my needs! I enjoy this way of talking, very much!

Even though the talk initially about boys and sex was pretty crude, it quickly turned to the subject of each of our needs and what we wanted from someone as a partner. Sure, I want a lover… eventually, when I’m older. But I want a lover who is sensitive to my needs and wants my heart, not my… body. It’s a similar theme that each of them let out in the chat we had during the ride.

It’s been almost two weeks since I started on this road trip into femininity, something I once thought of as alien, yet now, I totally embrace. I can’t believe how much I’ve changed, but I love what I have become!

I still have a whole lot more to learn too.
 

*          *          *
 
Miss Benson was waiting when we arrived.

“Girls, you’ll have to hurry. The photo session starts in twenty-five minutes,” she barked.

The girls went down the hallway towards the teacher’s lounge to change.

Miss Benson looked at me. She had one of those ‘I can’t believe what I’m seeing’ type of looks. Her eyes were as wide as dinner plates! She fumbled open the door to the school office, motioning for both Mindy and myself to come in. I would have thought she would have said something to me, but didn’t. I guess some things are best left unsaid?

“Mindy!” I panicked. “Miss Benson didn’t say anything at all about my appearance!”

“I know. I think she was shocked at how beautiful you are Lynn. Wait until she sees you in that dress! I hope she doesn’t faint!’ Mindy laughed.

Mindy and I went behind the office counter and entered Miss Benson’s office. Mindy closed the door. It was then she had a look of being forlorn on her face.

“Lynn you need to remove everything you have on, except for your panties. Use these hangers to hang them up on. I’ll help you dress when you’re ready.”

I watched Mindy’s face. It was still there. What is wrong?

I removed my clothing and my bra. My forms were glued firmly to my chest, so I didn’t have to be afraid of them falling off. I did wish I could have kept the bra on though, as their weight was rather uncomfortable.

Mindy approached with the matching red strapless bra.

“Lynn, here, turn around. I’ll help you with this.”

She attached the hooks on the back and pulled it up enough to give me a small amount of support.

Next, I put on the sheer panty hose and a red half-slip. Mindy then opened the garment bag and slowly removed my dress. It looked so fragile. I wondered if I would be doing it justice by putting it on?

Mindy lowered it over my head and let it fall seductively down my body. I had never felt anything as erotic as that fabric caressing my skin as it fell into place! The dress was an off the shoulder satin fabric. It had long sleeves that that were covered with lace up to the neckline of the dress. The hem stopped two inches above my knees. As she pulled the zipper up, I had to suck in my stomach in for her to zip it closed! Beauty has a price! It was called being slightly uncomfortable.

Mindy placed my heels on my feet and buckled the ankle straps for me and then finished by lightly brushing my hair back into place. Mindy stood and looked at her creation.

“Lynn!! J-jjust look!” she said, and pointed me at the full length mirror hanging on the bathroom door.

That girl could not be ME! I was frozen looking at myself. Words fail to describe how I looked. I was so much more beautiful than when I had left the salon. I would never have dreamed that I could look — like this! I was afraid to move, for fear that the image would disappear.

“Well, girlfriend, did we do good?” Mindy asked. She still had a look of sadness about her.

“I can’t believe this is me!” I answered, enraptured and spellbound by my own reflection.

Then Mindy said, “Lynn. Do you really like it?”

“Mindy, how could I not? I love it! It’s ME!”

I could see a look of disappointment on Mindy’s face. “Do you really?” she asked again.

“Yes!” I brightened my smile. “I have finally become the girl which was voted Princess for our class. And I owe it all — to you!” I was radiating just how much of a girl I was when I had answered her. My happiness was showing through my smile, my movements, and the way that I was looking at myself in the mirror. I was turning this way and that to catch a different glimpse of myself, posing.

Tears started to trickle down from her eyes.

What the fudge did I say that was so wrong?

“Mindy, what’s wrong?” I asked as I stopped posing and looked at her.

“It’s nothing,” she answered.

I walked over to her and held her hands. “You know that not’s true Mindy. There is something wrong. Please tell me?”

“I know now that we shouldn’t have done this thing. We should have given in and admitted to this prank , stopping it before it had gotten this far. The way you just expressed yourself when you answered my question just told me. This was supposed to be a prank, and it’s turned into something altogether different. I ruined you!” Mindy sniffled, as her eyes filled with tears.

Huh?

“How did you ruin me?”

“You don’t understand, do you? You were a sweet little boy when all of this began. Now you look, feel, and I can see, are a girl now. I don’t know when it happened, but it did! You’ll never be the sweet boy I adored - ever again. And it’s my fault!” Mindy cried.

“Mindy, this is just a costume!” I replied in my most feminine voice. I was keen on not wanting to upset Mindy over this right now. Yes, I was a girl. Yes, she was right. But I wanted to a better place and time to break this to her. Not here. Not now.

Mindy took her finger and traced it along my cheek and chin. “Lynn, you have changed. Maybe you don’t see it, but I do and I feel responsible for it. You’re so natural at being a girl that you don’t even know the changes taking place about you. Everything you do screams girl now, even when you’re dressed as a boy. At school the kids thought you were weird for dressing like a boy. And everyone else seems to have always thought you were a girl. That shocked me too after your first day going to school as a girl. I had many kids approach me and ask me why you wear those clothes. She’s so pretty, what a waste, they said. Even then, it made you precious to me as a friend being a boy and being that way.”

“Lynn, you just aren’t the same person anymore. I’m so sorry… I damaged you,” Mindy sniffed.

“Mindy. Look. You’re not making any sense to me. I’m not damaged. And what would be so wrong if I really was a girl?” I pointed out.

“You were born a boy, that’s what’s wrong!”

I had to respond to that!

“Mindy, I wasn’t happy then either huh? But now I am. Mindy, I am a girl. I always have been. It’s just that I haven’t always been like this — out in the open. I was caged up inside. I was pretty much acting the entire time, trying to be a boy to please everyone else’s expectations of me. Everyone else chalked it up to my being weird or something. I had no idea that everyone, here at school, thought I had always been a girl! But guess what? I love being a girl and I would have never known it if you hadn’t helped me.”

“I know,” she sadly acknowledged and started to cry again.

I had to do something right now to stop this or Mindy would have me crying too! If I ruined my makeup, that would be disastrous!

“Mindy, please. Don’t cry. I could have ended this thing just as easily as you, but I was curious. I wanted to see what the other side saw, and I did. What happened has nothing to do with you. All I did was find myself. I would have eventually… and I’m sure it’s better now than later.”

Mindy squeezed my hand as I dabbed at her tears with some tissue.

I reassured Mindy, “I am always your friend Mindy. You did nothing wrong to me. Let’s go and join the others, okay?”

Mindy nodded. We gathered my things and carried them out of the office.
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy and I went to join the other girls for the photo shoot. Miss Benson couldn’t keep from staring at me. All during my photo session alone, She kept opening her mouth as if to say something , but didn’t. Carla and Tina Oooo’d! and AAhhh’d! me and even Melissa seemed impressed at the poses I was making and how I held myself to the camera. This stuff seemed really easy to do and the photographer didn’t have to instruct me much for the shots he wanted to take. I seemed a natural. And this was really great!

Carla’s turn for pose shots alone was next and I walked over to Miss Benson and Mindy feeling good about myself. Miss Benson was still giving me that odd look! What was wrong?

“Is there something wrong Miss Benson?” I asked, as I moved closer to her.

Miss Benson motioned for me to follow her around the corner. Mindy, curious as to what was happening, followed as well.

The sound of the camera’s clicking and the photographer’s instructions died down some as we got to a quiet spot.

“Child,” she whispered, “Is this some kind of prank you are both are pulling on me? Lynn, answer me truthfully. Are you really a boy?"

“I really don’t think I am anymore Ma’am. I mean physically, I am still a boy down below, but inside, I am a girl. This is who I’ve become and I am finally me! And I want to thank you for having given me the opportunity to be in this contest and Mindy for showing me who I really am,” I stated.

Miss Benson turned green when I said that. I knew why too. She had thought that she was teaching Mindy and I a lesson about jokes and their consequences. She was going to have a real laugh at my expense, but she didn’t know that I would become as beautiful as I had. I think the thing that scared her the most was that she could see that I wasn’t a boy masquerading as a girl anymore, but a girl who had finally become herself, and be a Princess. If any word of this were to get out, other adults might think she coerced or forced me into this and she might go to jail. I vowed that when the time came, if anyone accused her, I would stand up and admit that all of this was my own doing. After all, it was!

“Lynn,” Miss Benson timidly said, with a hint of sadness, “We’ll straighten everything out after all of this is over. You’re the prettiest Princess I have ever had grace my presence, so enjoy the rest of your day.”

“Thank you Miss Benson,” I smiled. “I will.”
 

*          *          *
 
I rejoined the girls for the group shots with just the queen and her court. Next, the guys had their pictures taken. That took a little longer than it should have because one of them was always putting two fingers up behind someone’s head. Miss Benson finally stepped in and told them that if they didn’t stop, there would be no boys in the pictures. I was relieved! I wanted this photo session to go well! I admit I was somewhat greedy in that aspect because I had a lot of myself invested in this moment and this day!

The entire Homecoming Court was next and then each class couple was photographed together. Lastly, some special non-published shots, specifically for the individual and their family and friends to have, were taken. The boys had a few taken, but the girls spent several minutes posing. I was the last and it took a long time for me to finish. Everyone else in the court was astonished at how long and how much attention the photographer paid towards me. I was becoming embarrassed! The other girls were waiting patiently for the man to finish, but I could feel a twinge of jealousy in their stares towards me. I caught it in their eyes as I changed poses.
 

*          *          *
 
“Just one more Lynn, you’re a natural!” he beamed. *click!* “There, all done!”

He walked over and helped me up off the floor from a reclining pose.

“Here’s my card. I really want you to call me, or have your parents do it for you. There’s a lot of money to be made for you dear girl, and I’d hate to see you miss out on it.”

What was he talking about? Money, me? Just for being a girl? Ummm, yeah. I’ll have to get back to you on that one later. There was going to be a line of people wanting me dead first starting tonight. Yeah, so ummm, I don’t think like that’s going to happen!

“Come on Lynn, the parade’s about to start,” Melissa agitatedly said. I could tell she was nervous because we were cutting it a little too close for time.
 

*          *          *
 
Miss Benson escorted us outside where we were greeted by four convertible cars. They were all old, and they were like from the sixties! They were beautiful!

I went into the first car with my escort, Bill Jones. Our car was an Olds 88 and was painted red and white.

Sophomore Princess Carla Stanton and her Prince Joey Feingold occupied the second car, a GTO that was all red.

The third car, a Dodge, held the juniors, Tina Weeks and Sean Murphy.

The last car, a Cadillac held Queen Melissa and her King Jason Carlson.

We all sat on top of the rear seat of the car we were assigned and waved to the audience as we traveled around the football field. Our side of the stadium cheered as we past, and of course the other side made jeers at the girls and commented on what they would like to do to us. Some of the remarks were downright filthy and anger seethed within me at them. Some made me blush. But I felt only felt better when Bill put his arm around my waist and held me against his side. Having a nice guy protecting me felt wonderful!

We arrived back at the gym and went inside to wait for the end of the game. We girls felt it best not to join the rest of the students in the bleachers because we might ruin our dresses. The guys gathered to one side and we girls sat in some chairs lining the wall. We talked about our escorts and who had the hottest one: Melissa did.

The game ended and we went to get ready for the dance. The dance was to be held in the gym so we waited in the girl’s locker room before we made our entrance. It took almost an hour before the gym filled with students and we were pretty much at the end of our rope, as far as patience was concerned.
 

*          *          *
 
Miss Benson finally came to line us up for the entrance to the dance. I was the first to enter because I’m the youngest and then the others would follow. My escort would join me from the door to the boy’s locker room. The music started and I walked out the door and saw Bill walking towards me. He’s very handsome and I couldn’t help smiling at him. A lot of the students cheered and yelled when they saw me come out. Boy was it loud! We met and joined arms. We walked towards the center of the room to be announced.

The cacophony of everyone cheering me and compliments being yelled out just kept on going! Stephanie Emming, the Student Body President, tapped the microphone a couple of times and then loudly stated, “Please everyone! Calm down. Calm down.” A couple of minutes later, it did. A few boys were still whistling at me!

“Ladies and gentlemen I’d like to introduce Princess Lynn Collins and Prince Bill Jones of this year’s freshman class,” she continued. The cheers roared again.

I have never felt more proud of myself at any point in my life than I did at that moment! I was a beautiful girl and I was presented for the entire world to see! My eyes begin to water. Oh please! Not now! I thought. Bill glanced over at me, and seeing that I was about to cry and getting incredibly shy pulled me tightly against his side where I rested my head against him. The cheering seemed to keep going. I managed to regain enough composure to walk with Bill over to our position.

The other three couples were introduced and then the dance started.
 

*          *          *
 
This whole affair had been magical to this point and the dance made it that much more special! The dance was almost like a fairy tale wedding! The King and Queen started dancing first and then the other couples followed suit. I was so overwhelmed, I practically melted into Bill’s arms as we danced the first dance. When the music ended I felt Bill pull away.

That woke me up.

“I have to find Ashley,” Bill said. “You were wonderful Lynn,” he continued as he backed away and began to look around for her.

I was crushed! Now I was all alone!

I was so infatuated with Bill that I forgot that he had a girlfriend already.

I didn’t remain that way for long. As soon as Bill left, some boy, I didn’t know, asked me to dance with him. And so it went for the remainder of the evening. Boys were lining up for the privilege to dance with me!
 

*          *          *
 
I remembered what it was like before I became a girl trying to impress girls that I liked to be my friend. And what a fool I made of myself! I had zero luck! Now… it was boys doing the same towards me! I felt empowered to have this kind of reaction from boys! I was flattered and felt wonderful both at the same time! I was desired! I was wanted! And a lot of them wanted me to be their girlfriend too! It overwhelmed my senses entirely! I went from grunge to a Princess in a little over two weeks and now boys begged to be with me! If they only knew the truth about me… they’d kill me!

I wasn’t going to let that thought ruin my night!

So I smiled and flirted with every guy that asked me to dance with them.
 

*          *          *
 
The dance was more than half over when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I had danced every dance so the tap wasn’t new. But this time, the boy was. I looked up into Jason Carlson’s eyes and felt a tenseness grip my body. Oh my God! He wants to dance with me! - a lowly freshman. I wanted to faint.

Jason’s strong grip around my waist and holding my dainty hand inside his rugged paw made me swoon. This just felt so right! This was absolutely what I was supposed to be! A girl! I felt privileged myself just being able to dance with him! I mean he barely even knew me, but I had seen him around school some. He was very handsome and his body was very fit!

Luckily that dance was fast so I was able to gather my wits about me before I made a fool of myself in front of him! We smiled and giggled at each other’s dance moves. It was all in good fun. Jason started to disrupt the line of boys still wanting to dance with me by telling them that I was his for the rest of the night. Oh Snap! That was a little up front in assuming that’s what I wanted! Oh shut up body! I know what you think! The next dance was slow and Jason pulled me up against him during it.

Jason is a very tall boy, and even with my heels on, I only managed to come to his shoulders. I lay my head upon his chest as I fell victim to the music, the moment, and him. I felt every romantic beat of the music as I imagined it to be his heart, beating for me, as we moved slowly around the floor. There was no way I would ever want be a boy again! Never! This magic of being a girl and being this way and feeling these feelings was everything I was about! I felt like I was his lover and, some part of me, never wanted this moment to end.

The music stopped and Jason and I hadn’t said a word. He lifted my face up gently from his chest and looked at my face. He saw slow trickles of tears coursing their way over my cheeks. Being the man he was, he took a handkerchief from his tuxedo jacket and dabbed at my eyes and wiped the bits of makeup that were ruined from them.

“What’s the matter Lynn?”

“Nothing… Jason. I’m just so happy right now.” I smiled a heartwarming smile back to him. We didn’t need to say anything more. The look in our eyes said everything that needed to be said to each other.

“Okay dear. Let’s rest,” he said taking my hand and leading me from the dance floor. We found some seats at the end of a table and Jason supported me as I lowered myself into the chair.

“I’ll get us some punch and a few snacks,” he beamed as he went off in search of them. My heart was still pounding in my chest.

Why was Jason having such an effect on me?

“Here you go, Lynn,” Jason said when he returned. He set down a small snack plate of veggies with dip some crackers and cheese spread. Then he set the two plastic cups of punch before us.

“Thank you,” I blushed. I didn’t know what else to say to this God of a man. I hope that I am satisfying him! I mean… impressed with me.

“Why haven’t I seen you around school here before?” he asked, all the while staring into my eyes, with those beautiful blue hunky orbs of his!

“I don’t know,” I nervously replied. ‘I was here all along Jason’ I thought to myself. ‘You would not have looked at me this way before either. You wouldn’t like the body beneath this dress.’ I quickly shoved that reality from my mind!

I guess Jason noticed how much a fool I was being in how I shied away at times from his stare to how I answered some of his questions.

“Geez Lynn! Relax. I’m just like any other guy you’ve been with. I know I’m a senior and you’re a freshman, but I can’t believe I could have missed seeing someone as beautiful as you here at school.”

“I’m ummmm, well, really kind of shy. I don’t have a lot of friends.” I answered, truthfully.

“I find that difficult to believe Lynn. Look, most of the boys here are still eying you, waiting for me to leave you all alone. How could you not have friends?”

I had some friends yeah. I made them all while attending school as a girl. But boys? Not really. I kept stoically fending them off of me. I’m just not ready for a boy friend to want more and my life is complicated enough as it is right now.

“Jason, before last week, I was really very shy. I sort of kept to myself and I did not have many friends. I was not ready for attention like this and it still scares me!”

Jason sort of chuckled. “There’s no reason for you to be shy. You’re the prettiest girl in the court if not the entire school!”

Omigod! Really? I blushed again.

“I’ve never thought of myself as being pretty. I want people to like me for who I am.”

“That’s just about the stupidest thing I have ever heard Lynn,” Jason snorted with a grin. “How could you think that you are not pretty looking the way that you do? You are beautiful in both personality and looks. You have an innocence and sweetness about you. You are special! I feel it emanating out from you. I can sense that you are a wonderful and exciting girl. You make me feel very proud just for allowing me to be here with you right now. Lynn, I knew from the first moment that I saw you that you were very special girl!”

I was blushing, big time! I just set down the carrot I had started to munch on with dip.

Jason had no idea how much he was affecting me, but his words put it over the top. I was starting to fall in love with this boy!

“I don’t know…,” I lightly whined in shyness. “The way that I was raised was to not draw attention to myself. I didn’t even enter this contest - my girl friend entered me into it on her own. I was like, so embarrassed, when I found out I had been entered and actually won.”

Jason smiled. “Well the school made the right decision in voting for you girl. You are doing something to me right now. Affecting me. God, you’re so gorgeous! Come on, let’s dance before I make a bigger fool of myself.” Jason embarrassingly said, blushing as badly as I was.
 

*          *          *
 
We left our food on the table as we danced the rest of the dances together. All of my admirers had stopped asking to dance with me because Jason had told a few of them off rather bluntly. This was the time of my life!

After another short break, the last dance was announced and all of the couples scrambled to take the person they wanted to be with. Jason held tightly onto my hand.

“Will you dance with me?” he asked.

What?

We have been doing that all night you crazy boy! What kind of stupid question was that? Of course I’d crawl through Hell itself to dance with you!

“I’d love to,” I responded. This almost felt like a something out of a wedding!
 

*          *          *
 
The music started and it was some love ballad from the seventies. It was so perfect! Jason and I danced closer and closer until I had both hands around his neck. I couldn’t hold him tight enough! I was so lost in the music that I swayed softly together in rhythm with him.

My eyes were closed and I was sort of daydreaming, imagining our children running to us, Jason and I, on the other side of the white picket fence. Mmmmmmm! I felt his arousal against my hip. He wanted me badly! Truth be told, I wanted him real bad too! My husband…

My eyes flew open! Fudge! What the heck am I thinking? I’m only fourteen! I’m still way too young to have a baby!

A baby…

That’s when I almost had a nervous breakdown. I shivered and was frightened. I’m not a real girl, and I doubted I ever would be. I wanted to have a baby! Jason’s baby, and soooo so bad! I kept wishing with all my might that God would have mercy on my poor soul and grant me my wish to be a real girl - where it counted! To feel it all and be one!

What was I supposed to do now?

Mindy had tricked me into this. And Miss Benson had sort of made made me follow through this with all of the options clearly laid out upon the table for me. I mean, How could I refuse her and let down the school? Even worse, I was falling in love with this older man, who didn’t even know that I was a boy! I wanted to cry.

Jason lowered his lips to mine and kissed me. It was soft and sensual and it did something to me that I never expected! It set off a warmth in my stomach that engulfed me and felt like a raging fire within! I wanted him!!!!! I wanted him now!! I looked up into his eyes through my tear filled vision. I saw the want as well within his eyes. He merely kissed me again and quelled further thinking as I lost myself between his lips.

When our lips parted, and I felt like a guppy out of water. My breath of life exhaled out. I was exhausted! But it felt soooo good! It was then that I noticed that the music was still playing. I closed my eyes again and drifted off into a love cocoon that Jason had so skillfully woven.

It was then I realized that the music had stopped. I slowly opened my eyes and felt the stares of the other students and faculty on me! We were the only couple left on the floor and we hadn’t stopped our dance!

“Jason,” I quickly whispered. “I think the music stopped.”

Jason, embarrassed glanced about, seeing that indeed, I was right. To make things worse he couldn’t pull himself from me. His thing between his legs had been bulging against me the entire dance, and even though I loved the feel of it, he couldn’t quite pull away from me without it showing! It made me feel wonderful that he wanted me so bad and embarrassed that others might see his lust for me too.

After a few more minutes of dancing, I could feel his bulge softening. “We should go,” he whispered into my ear has he gently chewed and bit on my right earlobe. OOooohhh God! That made me feel like I was his property! Wow!
 

*          *          *
 
I tried hard to regain my senses and realized what I needed to do.

“I have to find Mindy,” I sort of panicked. “She’s supposed to take me home.”

Oh gosh! Where has she been all night? I haven’t seen her!!!

“I wish it could be me instead of her, but I understand. Would it be okay if I could call you?” he asked.

I went flush. Why did he have this affect on me? He made me feel even more of a girl than Rex had back in the theater!

“Yes,” I answered quickly as I pulled out a pen from my purse and a slip of paper and jotted down my number.

“But my mom won’t let me date until I’m sixteen.”

I hoped that would settle everything that was going on between us. I mean, if it was up to me, I’d go out with Jason every minute of the day! But I knew I couldn’t, age not being the issue. I had responsibilities and things I needed to do. I was growing up myself and needed to be able to support myself one day.

“I’d like to call you anyways Lynn. I love you.”

Snap! I’d do anything for this guy… and then he had to spoil it with the L word. I love my mother, and no one else. I love Mindy too - but only as a friend. But now you just had to step over the line and say the word I was so afraid of. Love!

Why did you have to say that to me?

I wanted to die.

My heart went up to another level as he said that. How in the world am I supposed to respond to that? Gosh Jason, I’m really a guy, and look hot. Oh, and by the way, I love you too?

I never felt more shame in my entire life as I do now.

I didn’t even know Jason, but I knew that he was special too! I knew that I was really lucky to have a boy like Jason wanting me. I just can’t describe how I felt right now, at this moment - the silence was deafening me! I then felt streams of liquid running down my cheek.

Jason started dabbing at them with his handkerchief. I didn’t even see him get his handkerchief out, I was still so stunned and dazed!

And thank God Jason had enough of a brain to say something!

“I’m sorry Lynn. Perhaps I shouldn’t have said that. I know barely even know you, but my God, you’re someone very awesome to be with, you know?”

That I could respond to!

I leaned up and kissed him back on his lips. He paused dabbing my face and had his arms around my waist again as I sank back in the blessed waters of heaven within his embrace.

“You’re special to me too, Jason,” I swooned as we parted lips again.

I noticed that we hadn’t stopped holding hands either.
 

*          *          *
 
Miss Benson noticed us and came walking toward us. I thought she about to say something about our obvious show of affection.

“Lynn, do you have a ride home?” she asked.

“I’m riding with Mindy,” I responded.

“I was afraid of that,” she said, with concern in her voice. “Mindy was taken to the hospital.”

My stomach dropped! What the heck happened to her? Where was I going to change? The changing I could take care of, mom wasn’t going to be home for a couple of hours yet. But, Mindy! What happened?

“Oh no! Miss Benson, what happened to her?”

“I’m not at liberty to say, but she was taken by ambulance to the ER and her parents were notified and were going to be with her.”

I wanted to be with her right now in the hospital! I mean, She was my bestest friend in the entire world. I needed to be with her! But her parents… They might then find out about me and realize who I really was. I was not ready for that kind of quarrel, especially with Mindy in a hospital bed! Fudge! Fudge! Fudge!

“How am I going to get home?” I whimpered with my questioning eyes.

“Miss Benson, I’d be more than happy to take Lynn to her home,” Jason offered.

Miss Benson eyed Jason sharply and then back to me.

“If it wasn’t my responsibility to close the school, I’d be taking her home myself. Jason, I know you, and you’re a fine young man with outstanding grades. You haven’t been in any trouble the entire time you have been in this school. Lynn is it okay with you for Jason to take you home? Or would rather wait for me to lock up and have me take you?”

I hovered in thought for a moment. I love this man — a lot. I guess I could trust him.

“I’d like for him to take me home, that is, if it’s alright with you Miss Benson?”

She looked sternly at Jason.

“I’ll let you take Lynn home, but don’t you dare do anything to change my image of you. And Lynn, you behave yourself,” she admonished.

Did I mention that we had stopped holding hands during our conversation with Miss Benson? Our hands found each other again except that our fingers intertwined this time. We were all smiles.
 

*          *          *
 
Jason drove me home and I sat as close to him as possible. He sort of behaved except when his hand found its way to my knee. I thought I was going to die when he touched it! To make matters worse he started to caress it. I wanted to crawl all over him!

I had no idea what he was doing as I felt his hand move slowly higher on my thigh, his fingers gently caressing my inner thigh. My body was telling me that I was his! And I liked what he was doing! Luckily nothing else happened before we reached my house. He had only touched my thigh near my knees, but if he had gone any farther… I don’t know what would have happened!

Jason walked me to my door. He looked at me and pulled me to him again. Our lips touched and the magic flowed! I was in love with the King of the Homecoming! He should have been with Melissa, but instead, he had left her to drive me home! Our lips parted and I couldn’t help myself, I pushed away from him.

“I’m sorry, Lynn. I shouldn’t have rushed things,” he apologized.

Rushed things? God, I’m only fourteen and you want to get into my panties?

“I’m sorry too, Jason. I’m not ready yet for what it is we both want,” I said.

I felt kind of grown up in my response. I had told the boy I so wanted badly to be with that I was a girl with a mind of my own. He also knew I had morals and was sticking to them. I felt proud of myself, for being an adult.

“Well hey, I’ll catch you at school.” he grinned after one last peck on my cheek and then walked back to his car.

So much for being Miss older woman! *sigh* If only…

I entered my house and Jason watched until I had closed the door. He definitely had manners!
 

*          *          *
 
Now I had something else to take care of... ME! I wasn’t the person that had left the house this morning! And I didn’t have Mindy to help me to become Lynn the boy again. And gosh! I was so tired and sore from all of the dancing! As much as I hated too, I knew that my costume had to be removed. Costume? Those were the dying words of the boy within me. The girl that I was recanted that this was natural for who I was and what I am supposed to wear. That was so much stronger of a response than the initial boyish protest had been.

It was then, that I felt a cold chill and something left me.

I shivered.
 

*          *          *
 
I walked over to the sofa and lowered myself slowly into it properly like I had seen other girls do. I smoothed my dress out before I slowly sat and didn’t plop down into it like a boy. I was a regal girl. I sat for a moment and thought about my day. I did feel special. I cleared my head and tried to let Lynn the boy take back over. Try as I might, he wasn’t there!

Did something just happen to me?

Oh gosh! What do I do? Take off the heels first, and then the rest will be easy, I thought. I reached for the ankle buckle on my heels. Mindy had done this for me and now I had to do it for myself. I pulled at the strap and felt my fingers slip away from the buckle. Crap! These nails are in the way! And if I try too hard, I may break them! That would be disastrous!

Think Lynn! Think! There has to be a way to remove my heels without chipping my nails! Wait a minute, I thought, I’ll think of something! Girls do this all the time and don’t have a problem, so I’ll figure it out!

If I had thought properly about this at the time, ‘Who gives a fudge what happened to my nails? Just as long as they were gone by the time mom got home!’, I might still be a boy to this day. But that’s not where my head was. There was no way I was going to ruin my nails! I crossed my legs at my knees and tucked my foot behind my ankle.

I’ll think of something!

I thought about just going ahead and changing out of my clothes, but again, that wasn't where my head was. I was in Jason’s arms, kissing him and letting his hands start to crawl about me. I drifted off in Jason’s embrace. The more I thought about him, the softer my body felt. Sleep took over as he was holding me and covering me with kisses.
 

*          *          *
 
Susan Collins pushed her key into the dead lock on her door. The pins slid softly over the cuts on the key. The bolt snapped open with a click. Susan had had several drinks at the shower after the wedding reception she had attended and was slightly giddy as she entered her house. She closed the door softly, not wanting to wake her son whom she knew must be in bed by now.

She walked in towards the living room, trying to keep her heels from clicking on the hardwood floor.

It was then she saw a girl sleeping on her couch!

Her first thought when she saw the lovely young woman on the sofa, was that her baby had finally found a girl friend! She smiled. She looked at the girl as only a mother would. She wasn’t Mindy, thank God for that! Not that Susan didn’t like Mindy, but she was too much like her son. No, this girl was definitely different. She was beautiful and showed such class! She almost appeared to be like a model!

Her hair was perfect for her face, and she didn’t sit with her legs apart, even though she was asleep! She was definitely a special person!

Susan wondered where her son was?

She was going to call out, but thought better of it. Why not talk to Lynn’s girlfriend before he has a chance to skew her answers? she grinned in her thoughts. Susan walked over to the girl and touched her shoulder just enough to wake her.
 

*          *          *
 
Jason was gently kiss/nibbling my neck, as I was leaning all the way back, offering it to him, when I felt my shoulder being shaken. What? What’s going on?

I slowly opened my eyes and saw someone I didn’t want to see! Fear started to grab a hold of me!

“Mommy?” I hazily asked, as I awoke to the horror of the situation I was now in.

Then it hit me - the perversion of who and what I was and my feelings, the hiding and sneaking around, all the tension of the last two weeks, everything that was wrong with what I had done. My eyes filled with tears as I shook. There was nothing I could do to stop them! I felt fear as I knew she was absolutely going to hate me now. I couldn’t feel shame for loving being a girl, because that’s what I had become. I was ashamed I had let my mother down and now she was going to hate me forever! My life was over!

The tears flowed.

My mother just dropped her handbag. The thud of it hitting the floor echoed about the room.

“Mommy!!!"

---

 

To Be Continued in Book Two - Princess Found

Homecoming Princess (Revised) Princess Found   Part 8 By Arecee   Edited and proofed by Sephrena Lynn Miller

 
“I’m sure Miss Benson put no pressure on you to cover her butt either to keep up this charade?” Mom spat.

“Really Mom!” I pleaded. “I chose this.”

“Lynn, I’m so angry right now, please, don’t say another word! You and Mindy could have ended this before things went beyond crazy. All you had to do was tell the truth, and Miss Benson should have accepted that she was part of a cruel hoax. That should have been the end of it.”

“Please don’t be angry, Mom! I really don’t mind being a girl."

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
I really don’t quite know how to start this next chapter of my life? What had been a magical journey had now turned into the worst nightmare a girl could ever experience: being accused of murder! How in the world could this could have ever happened?

*shaking my head*

I guess that it began from the first time that I put lipstick on my lips. My fate was sealed from that very moment. I guess you are wondering how something so innocent could lead to such a personal destruction? I’m still wondering that myself. So, I’ll continue where my Mother, much to her shock, found me, her son, dressed as a Homecoming Princess.

I had stupidly fallen asleep after I had been brought home by my date - no, he wasn’t really my date - but the King, and he happened to have a driver’s license and a car. Wait a minute! Now that sounded really stupid! Omigosh! He wasn’t a real King, but the Homecoming King, and never mind that I kissed him goodnight, or that I even had unwisely started to fall in love with him. None of that is important now. But I had feelings and Jason definitely knew how to evoke them out of me. If it weren’t for his warm, gentle, all consuming kisses (Mmmmm!) my mother would never have found me dressed the way that I was, and I might still be a miserable boy here trying to relate to you a different life that I had led.

Well... I did fall asleep. And yes! I got caught!

I remember that night vividly, like it was yesterday.
 

*          *          *
 
I was frozen like a deer in a car’s headlight! My Mother’s eyes! Fudge! Fudge! Fudge! She was more than upset! This wasn’t the way things were supposed to be! I was still her son as far as she was concerned and I was dressed to the nines in a dress that Mindy and me had bought for the pageant and made-up like a girl twice my age. My stomach was sick and queasy while tears streamed down my face. I shaking like a leaf!

“M-mm-mommy…” I let quietly escape from my ‘oh so sexy, red lips.’ I was beyond scared! I started to push back against the armrest of the couch trying to scoot up it. Thoughts of how I could run and get away were now crossing my mind.

I was still being met by the icily cold stare of my Mother’s eyes.

The look of disgust on her face was telling me all that I needed to know about what she thought of me! I think that I was hurting more than I would have if she would have just said something to me, anything! no matter how bad it might have been! At least then I would know my fate!

Still… silence.

I couldn’t hold it back anymore! I started hiccupping and sobbing. I covered my face in shame and curled up, dissolving into a quivering mass of tears.
 

*          *          *
 
Much to my surprise, I felt my Mother sit down next to me on the sofa and put her arms around me. She pulled me in tight to her breast and let me cry it all out.

“Shh, baby, it’s all right. Don’t cry anymore,” my mom comforted me. “It’s ok hon. I’m not mad at you.”

I don’t know how she did it, but my Mother’s hug and reassurance had a calming effect on me. A few minutes later, she gently pulled down one of my hands that I had pushed up against my eyes, covering them, away, and she looked down at me into my teary-eyed vision.

I was still letting water come out as I looked up at her from lying against her chest up into her smile.“I-Im so-so… asha-am-med! I-I let yy-you d-down.”

Mom pulled back from me and finally looked me over. You know the look - the “what in the hell have you done to yourself?” look. When she first saw me she had to wake me up from a very deep sleep and then, well… you all you know what broke loose. My Mother only had a glimpse of me before I collapsed upon her shoulder. Now she just staring at me with a sense of wonderment. A small smile pursed her lips before she took a a couple of Kleenex tissues and started to wipe my face.

“Your makeup’s run sweetheart,” she said, as she was gently wiping under my eyes.

How much worse could things get? It was bad enough that I was actually caught by my mother, but now, my makeup was ruined! I’m sure I looked like a raccoon by now! I think that’s what that animal with the black patched eyes is called. I felt my chin quivering and my eyes tried to fill with tears once more.

“Don’t cry sweetheart, we’ve all gone through the same thing,” Mom sort of laughed as she was still dabbing away at my tears.

Then I said the dumbest thing possible, for a boy that is.

“But Mom!” I whined, “My makeup! It’s ruined!”

“Sweety, that can always be repaired,” she softly spoke.

“I guess…” I breathed back out. I looked back into her eyes.

“Will you help me Mom? With the makeup?” I asked her, not realizing the impact of such a question.

“Of course I will honey, but I think we have a lot of other things to talk about before I fix your makeup,” she answered.

Then, with an air of disbelief she continued, “I’ll give you this though, you sure fooled me when I walked in! I thought that you were your girlfriend for the Homecoming Dance.”

Yeah. I can see why too.

I took the tissue from her and finished wiping at my eyes. Her smile turned to a more quizzical look of concern.

“I’m going to put on a pot of water and I’ll make some tea for us, ok Sweety? You should change out of that beautiful dress before it gets ruined. Come back to the kitchen when you’re done and you have a lot to tell your Mother.”

Ummmm, yeah. I know Mom. I’m a failure.

Mom hugged me to her once again and helped me up from the couch.

From the expression on her face, I could sort of feel that she was hugging her child, not the new daughter she had unexpectedly discovered. Was she still really disappointed with me? I had a lot to think about too it seems.

I walked down the hallway to my room. I didn’t see the expression on my Mother’s face behind me as she watched me walk.

I closed the door, not wanting Mom to watch me as I changed. I don’t know why I felt that need for privacy like that still. I guess it was out of habit? I mean, I am a girl. And Mom is one too, sort of… just older. Wait. Im still physically a boy. We are not supposed to see each other. Geez!

I sat on the side of my bed and finally managed to undo the heel buckles that had caused me so much trouble before. It’s all in how you wedge the tip of your nail under the strap. I didn’t even chip a nail! I then removed my dress and hung it on a hangar in my closet, smoothing it down so that it hung freely with nothing touching it on either side. Mindy’s slip came off next and I hung that up as well. The pantyhose was last, but the rest stayed on.

I put on one of my boy’s white T-shirts and my dark blue stretchy jogging shorts.

I looked in the mirror and saw a grungy girl looking back. My makeup was still smudged, but for some reason, my T-shirt bothered me more than my ruined makeup. I remembered seeing girls with shirts like mine on before. They had tied the bottom tight under their breasts, exposing their tummies. I felt the need to do the same, so I could be just like them. And guess what? It did look better!

I went to see my Mom.
 

*          *          *
 
Mom’s eyebrows lifted when she saw me enter the kitchen. She was looking at what I had done with my shirt, but didn’t say anything. I just knew she wasn’t pleased because she didn’t smile. I guess I really couldn’t blame her. I was supposed to be her son. Now, I had breasts and was dressed like a girl in boy’s clothes. All tying the shirt did was emphasize the breasts that I don’t think she had noticed on me when I had the dress on before.

“Hi, Mom,” I timidly said.

I could tell mom was biting her tongue, not wanting to say something she might regret later.

“Here’s your tea Sweety,” she said, as she placed the steaming mug on the table in front of me. “Now would you please explain to me what happened here tonight?”

Oh gosh! Where do I really start? This was one heck of a mess and I was desperately trying to think of just how much I should say.

“Do you mean like you found me dressed like a girl?” I asked innocently.

The lights in the kitchen were dimmed slightly but it didn’t conceal my mother’s face turning red and the rage I could see churning beneath.

“Don’t be coy with me Lynn Collins! You know darn well what I mean. And it’s not just finding you dressed like a girl, a very beautiful girl I might add. I want to know what in the heck is going on! And I want everything, from start to finish!” Mom emphasized loudly. Her whole demeanor had changed and it wasn’t from nice to nicer.

“I want to know where my sweet little boy has gone.”

Mom loved me to pieces, and would kill anyone that threatened her child. But when she asked to be told something, I had better not try to evade what she was asking! Besides, how much worse could it get anyways? She has already met her daughter and seemed shocked, but she didn’t go ballistic - yet.

“Mother,” I stated, rather defeatedly, with my eyes looking down at the kitchen tabletop. “It all started out as a prank. It’s just that it... kinda went bad.”

My Mother raised her eyebrow again. “What kind of prank would have you dressed like the girl I saw when I got home this evening?”

“It was something Mindy and I did to fool the students at school, that’s all.”

“What do you mean - that’s all? Lynn, I want everything, and I want it now.”

I wanted to evade telling Mom everything that had happened with our stunt and all I was doing was pissing her off more than if I would just tell her the truth. I gave in. I had to tell her.

“Yes Mom. Mindy thought it would be funny if she entered me in the Homecoming pageant. She promised me that I wouldn’t win. Ashley had enough freshman votes to win our class.”

“Why would she enter you in that in the first place?”

“It was all because of a misunderstanding in Mr. Copeland’s class.”

“What’s Mr. Copeland got to do with this?”

“He thinks that I’m a girl.”

“I can see why,” Mom said with a frown.

“It’s not like that Mom! When I was transferred to his class, I had an accident and my rubber band broke that held my ponytail. He called me Miss Collins from that point on and Mindy thought it would be funny for him to make the same mistake every day. So we started taking my hair out of my ponytail look and fixing it differently every day to get a laugh from the class at how he reacted towards me.”

“I still don’t understand what that has to do with the way you look now?”

“Like I said, Mindy thought it would be funny for everyone to vote for me as the Homecoming Princess. After Ashley won, we’d let them know they were voting for a boy, and that was how it was supposed to be. Mindy didn’t know that the entire school voted for each class nominee. Ashley would have won except, well, I’m prettier than she is… and… I won.”

“You’re the Homecoming Princess?” Mom questioned me with a smirk. I could see her smiling rather proudly at that. But why would she find it so funny?

“Yes Mother. I’m very sorry.”

Mom stared at me and I could swear her eyes were searching me for something!

“Sorry just doesn’t cut it Lynn.” Mom said. “I look at you and all I see and feel is a girl.”

Her eyes were watering now. I felt like crap!

“Mom. I’m still a boy.” I quietly mentioned.

Mom just shook her head slowly and gave me the saddest look.

“From the look of things, I’m willing to believe that you are pretty much a girl already… aren’t you? “

I couldn’t bear looking at her upon hearing that. I lay my head back down on my arms. She was right. I did not really want to deny it.

“Where it counts, Lynn, is inside of you. I can see now that you are really not my son anymore. You have completely changed.”

Mom paused for a moment and then pulled some of my hair back from covering my face and stroked the side of my head. I take it she was admiring her daughter, but I just lay there and played scenes throughout my mind of everything I had gone through the past two weeks.

“A boy wouldn’t have tied his shirt under his breasts dear. Only a girl does that, and I know I never taught you that.” Mom continued. “Why didn’t you just tell the school that the whole affair was a prank and be done with it?” she asked, her tears drying.

I rolled my head back over on my arms to face her. “Miss Benson was so upset at the fraud me and Mindy committed, she told us that the organizations that donate to the school had already received my picture and wanted me to appear at the Homecoming functions for publicity shots and such for their donations to our school funding. If I backed out, she said they would most likely be upset and cut the funding.”

“Who’s Miss Benson?”

“She’s our school Principal.”

“Did she make you dress like this?” Mom’s voice rose again.

I sighed. “No Mother. She did not. I chose to do it. I could have said no. But I wouldn’t. She said I could admit to it and she would deal with the consequences… as well as me. But I couldn’t do that to her! So she said I had to become as much a girl as possible for the event. I didn’t want to embarrass the entire school.”

“Well,” Mom started, trying to find a reason, “Why didn’t you just choose to admit to the prank?”

“Because Mom, I was scared! She said that we had committed fraud, and I didn’t know what would happen to us or the school. She said that we had better think of something and Mindy suggested that I become a girl for the Homecoming. Miss Benson agreed to let me do it after we talked to her about it.”

“She agreed? Does she know what kind of damage she has already done to you?” Mom was almost shouting now.

Damage? What damage? I haven’t been hurt.

“Mother! I’m fine. I am not damaged.”

“You’re fine? You’re saying that? You’re sitting right in front of me with breasts, which I haven’t even addressed yet, and you tell me that you’re fine?” Mom shouted.

“Really Mom.” I groveled. “I wanted to do this.”

She was really mad now!

“I’ll be the one to decide that!”

Mom stewed on that thought for a minute while her eyes scoured my entire form.

“Your eyebrows certainly didn’t grow that way naturally,” Mom noticed while her fingers on her left hand tapped the side of her cheek.

I sat up and straightened myself.

“Um, well… we kind of went to a salon this morning for the makeovers for each girl, and they kinda shaped them for me.”

“I can see that.”

Mom was intensely thinking.

“Ok Sweety, let’s just cut to the chase. How many people know that you’re a boy?”

“Only Mindy and Miss Benson and you. The entire rest of the school has never really been sure about my sexuality, although everyone thinks I’m a girl now.”

“What about your water-polo team?”

Oh gosh!

“I got kicked off. The coach thought I was a girl and was swimming without a top on. He was going to lose his job if he had not covered for me by circulating a report stating that it had been a prank by someone from another school trying to get me in trouble. One guy on the team asked me why I didn’t swim with the girls after I won the Homecoming Princess contest.”

Mom just shook her head. This was so ridiculous to her it sounded like some B-rated comedy. But it was real life — and it was my life! It happened! I could tell she wanted to go off on me, but she didn’t. She just looked sick. To this day I still don’t understand why she didn’t scream at me.

Maybe if I become a parent, I’ll understand?

“Ok. How long have you been doing this Lynn?” she asked in a more remorseful tone.

“For almost two weeks,” I answered truthfully.

“So, this was the important project you and Mindy were working on?” she stated

“Yes. This was the whole thing.”

“Is there anything else that I should know about?”

“Umm, yes Ma’am. You kind of need to meet with Miss Benson on Monday about this whole affair. And…” I more quietly added, “I kind of have to attend school as a girl at least until Christmas Break. At that point, she could arrange a school transfer for me to another school if I wanted to go back to being a boy.”

This was going to push her over the top.

Yep! I was right! If steam could really come out of people’s ears like in cartoons, I’d have third degree burns twice over already!

“Yyy-you have to do what?” Mom almost screeched.

“I have to attend school as a girl.”

“Starting when?” she asked, through gritted teeth again.

Mom grabbed a cookie from the plate she had so thoughtfully placed on the table in between us, and bit down hard on it — really hard! I wondered if Ozzie Osborne’s bat felt the same way as that unfortunate cookie after that chunk was bitten off! It must have been similar to the cookie when it shattered all over the table.

“Since this Wednesday,” I responded, my eyes filling with tears as the shame of lying to my mother hit me.

“I’m sure Miss Benson put no pressure on you to cover her butt either to keep up this charade?” Mom spat.

“Really Mom!” I pleaded. “I chose this.”

“Lynn, I’m so angry right now, please, don’t say another word! You and Mindy could have ended this before things went beyond crazy. All you had to do was tell the truth, and Miss Benson should have accepted that she was part of a cruel hoax. That should have been the end of it.”

“Please don’t be angry, Mom! I really don’t mind being a girl."

Mom stared at the cookie and then back at me.

She then swept the broken cookie into her hand and placed the crumbs on the plate. Then she looked at me again. She had a sad expression on her face. As she stared though, she seemed to soften her anger and her sadness. She didn’t say anything to me for several minutes, until a slight smile crossed her lips.

“So, you won the Homecoming Princess title. I suppose there could be worse things in life than having your daughter be a Princess.”

“Then you’re not mad at me Mother?” I asked.

“Oh I wouldn’t go so far as to say that but, well… never mind. Ok Lynn, tell me about your reign as Princess,” Mom asked with a smile.

“Mom, we had so much fun! I rode around the field in the back of a convertible with my Prince and then we went to the dance afterward. It was magical!” I gushed.

Mom was finally smiling at me for real! It wasn’t one of those wide mouth, tooth-baring ones, but she meant it.

“What about the dance?”

“It was like a royal ball! I danced all night... and with many different boys. But the one that danced with me the most was Jason.”

Up went the eyebrows again.

“And who’s Jason?”

“He’s the King of the court. And… I think he likes me,” I blushed.

Mom rolled her eyes.

“Lynn! What are you thinking of? You are only 14 and not even a girl yet! Ok, not physically one yet. But yes, you are a girl. You should know better than to make your situation worse by getting involved with boys yet and we haven’t even gone over whether you should be a girl or not! You know my rule on dating too. Same thing applies to you whether you are a boy or girl.”

I meekly smiled. “I know Mother. I reminded Jason of that tonight and he respected it.”

“Where was Mindy when all of this took place?”

“They had to take her to the hospital.”

I freaked!

“Oh my God Mom! Mindy! I have to call her mother to find out what happened!”

“Not this time of night! It can wait until in the morning. How did you get home then?”

I really wanted know what happened to her - right now! *sigh* I'll have to wait...

“Jason brought me.”

“I’m going to want to know more about this Jason later, but where do we go from here now Lynn? Are you done with this nonsense?”

“It’s not nonsense Mom! I am a girl! And there’s one more thing I have to do as Princess as part of my functions. Tomorrow, I have to go to a convalescent hospital as my last duty as Princess.”

Mom chewed on that for a minute.

“What are you going to wear?”

“I don’t know? I thought I could borrow something from Mindy, but I wasn’t able to change at her place tonight. So… I don’t know?”

Mom got this silly look on her face before she said, “I’ve always wondered what it would be like to have a daughter to take shopping, so I guess I’ll find out tomorrow morning huh? First thing in the morning though, I’m taking you to the mall to find you something presentable to wear.”

“Really mom?” I squealed.

Mom’s eyes opened until I thought her eyeballs would pop out when she heard my excitement. Yeah, I was just like a girl with a new birthday present being revealed!

Mom had an expression on her face I couldn’t read. All I could see was confusion mixed with sadness. She took my hands in hers and said something that almost brought me to tears.

“I’ll love you no matter what you become Sweetheart. You’ll always be my sweet baby inside - whether you’re a girl or boy.”

“Mom…” I let trail off as I studied her expression.

“Lynn, I’m your Mother, and I know much better than you what’s happened to my boy. I love you sweetheart. Now, off to bed with you, and remove your makeup, or you’ll look a mess in the morning,” she finally laughed.

“Mom, um, like I don’t have anything here? Could I borrow your cold-cream?”

That scene in the bathroom that night!

Mom burst out laughing. “I never would have thought my son would be asking for makeup remover before asking to borrow my car. Come on Sweety, I’ll help you. Isn’t that what a Mother’s are supposed to do when their daughter comes home late?”

Mom brought me to the bathroom and removed my makeup for me. She put my hair up too, so that it would look nice in the morning. I even heard her humming softly to herself while she was fixing me up. When she finished, she kissed me on the cheek and said goodnight.
 

*          *          *
 
It was already after two in the morning but I was having trouble sleeping. All of my confessing to my mother had poured massive amounts of adrenaline into my system. I wish sleep would come easily, but it wasn’t. I lay there thinking about what had just taken place with my mother and where my life had to go.

It had taken almost two weeks for me to find the girl that had been hiding so quietly inside of me. How could I know I wanted to be a girl in such a short amount of time? Was the adventure of the disguise and deceit influencing my mind? Had I really become the girl that I thought I had? Was my popularity skewing my thoughts about what was really important - who I was? I knew I was a girl from the very first moment I saw myself in the mirror, but was afraid to admit it to myself at first, or to Mindy. Have I already broken my mother’s heart when I killed off her son? I had all but done that earlier. The only thing missing was telling her that there was no way her son would ever be returning.

In all her wisdom though, Mom had as much as admitted to me that she saw nothing of the boy who had run out of the house earlier that morning. I think she knew when we talked tonight that she now had a daughter, and to be truthful, I don’t think she was all that unhappy about it, after she had calmed down.

I was still scared from having hurt her too…
 

*          *          *
 
The sun came streaming through my windows and awoke me the next morning. I stretched and yawned and went to scratch my chest.

Oops!

I had forgotten that I now had something new on my body. I giggled to myself when my hands hit the protrusions. God I wish these were real! I thought to myself as I slightly fingered them.

I went to the bathroom to relieve myself and sat like I had been doing for the last two weeks. The girl in me was gaining control of my everyday duties. I looked in the mirror when I washed my hands. My hair was up, and I had no makeup on, but a girl still looked back at me. There was nothing left that said you’re still a boy. I wasn’t sure if I should be concerned, or happy?

I smelled breakfast and went to join my mother.

I wondered if she was still going to accept me — or not?
 

*          *          *
 
I entered the kitchen and mom gave me the biggest smile. I knew then, that my Mother truly loved me.

“How’s my little girl this morning?” she asked.

Holy smokes! She called me her little girl! How should I reply to that? Was she making fun of me, or was she really trying to accept me as a girl?

“I’m fine Mother,” I cautiously replied. “You should have awoke me when you got up. I would have liked to help you out with breakfast.”

“You would have? You never wanted to before,” she incredulously answered.

I could detect a small amount of tension in her voice with that answer, but I didn’t know if it was because of my appearance or something else... like my old lazy self before all this took place.

“That was before Mom. I have been wanting to help you around the house for over a week now, and have been. I told you I had changed. And I mean it. I think some of Mindy rubbed off onto me,” I laughed.

“It looks as though a little too much rubbed off! I meant to ask you about your breasts last night, but didn’t. Would you care to explain to me how you now have breasts?”

I felt my face turning red. I had forgotten all about them! But apparently Mom hadn’t!

“These are not real Mom. Miss Benson had them for the drama club at school, for girls that haven’t developed yet.”

“Then why are they still on your chest?”

“I didn’t have the stuff to take them off with. It’s still at Mindy’s house.”

“Are you telling me that you glued these breasts onto your chest?” Mom asked.

“I had to Mom, or I might have had an accident at the dance.”

Mom shook her head, before she said, “If I hadn’t seen it with my own two eyes, I wouldn’t have believed my son would be explaining glue-on breasts to me. Sundays used to be so relaxing.”

Mom’s face turned to a scowl again with the mention of Mindy.

“I don’t like that girl,” Mom said.

“Mom, this wasn’t Mindy’s fault! I am to blame! Me! I decided to do all of this, Okay?” I replied, really hoping that Mom wouldn’t hate Mindy.

“This thing was her idea, and I’m not going to forget that.”

“Oh my God, Mother! Please! She’s not responsible! And Mindy! I’m sorry Mom, but I have to see if she’s Okay! I have to find out what happened to her last night!” I exclaimed and ran to the phone.

“Don’t be too long,” Mom admonished.
 

*          *          *
 
I dialed Mindy’s number, and much to my surprise she answered the phone.

“Hello?”

“Mindy? It’s Lynn. What happened to you last night?” I hurriedly asked.

“Somebody put something in my drink last night and I passed out. I was so embarrassed when I woke up in the hospital.”

“What did your parents say?”

“They were so angry that it happened, especially at the school dance.”

I paused a moment, listening to her breathe on the other end of the phone connection.

“Are you going to be Okay?”

“I feel fine Lynn. Oh wait a minute! How did you get home?” she asked.

“Jason drove me. Aaaaaaand he kissed me goodnight!” I giggled nervously.

“He kissed you?” Mindy shrieked.

“YES!!!! And he’s cute too!” I said dreamily.

“Did you get home before your mother?”

“Yes. But something happened.”

“You had a chance to change didn’t you?”

“No.”

“Huh? Why not?”

“I uhmm, fell asleep on the couch?”

“You fell asleep? Before you changed?!!”

“I couldn’t help it Mindy! I was so tired.”

“Please tell me you awoke before your Mother came home!!!” the concern showing in her voice.

“She knows.”

I heard Mindy groan.

“Well, on the plus side, she obviously didn’t kill you. But I’m sure she has some kind of punishment in line for you. Are you grounded for the rest of your life?”

“Umm, no. She actually wants to take me shopping.”

I was met with silence as Mindy digested my words.

“Your Mother wants to take you shopping??? Like for girl's clothes?”

“Yeppers! I told her about the hospital visit this afternoon and she asked if I had anything to wear. I told her I had left my set of girl’s clothes over at your house and could borrow some of your clothes, but I didn’t know if or when you would be home from the hospital. So she wants to get me something to wear.”

“I don’t believe it! Your mother? Umm, do you think she would mind if I came along with you? I mean I can explain what happened and tell her that it was my fault about the entire thing.” Mindy asked.

“It’s okay Mindy. I confessed everything. And it’s my fault! Not yours. I'm accepting responsibility for it all. Okay?”

Mindy paused a moment. “Ok.”

“As for coming, sure! Maybe it’ll help how she feels about you just now.”

“I thought your Mom liked me?”

“She did - until I explained this whole fiasco to her last night. Let’s just say you’re not on her Christmas list.”

“Maybe I should stay home then,” she glumly replied.

“No! Please come! I’d hate to think of what my Mother will want to buy me, and you know what girls like us like to wear. I don’t want to be getting fashion from the fifties!”

Mindy giggled at that.

“I’ll ask my Mother if it’s okay.”

Mindy covered the phone with her hand but I could still hear her asking her Mother if she could join us.

“Mom says it’s okay, but she wants to talk to your Mother right now on the phone.”

“Okay,” I replied and turned to face the kitchen.

“Mom? Mrs. Swanson wants to talk to you,” I yelled.

Mom came over and took the phone from my hand. She and Mindy’s Mom talked for a few minutes without any mention of my new look.

“Great Janet! We’ll pick you up in an hour. We’ll make it a girls day out. See you in a few. Bye.”

Mom hung up the phone and looked at me.

“You’re going to have to hurry Lynn. We have to pick Janet and Mindy up in an hour,” she said.

“Mom, we only live five minutes away. We have an hour, what’s the rush?”

“And you think an hour is a lot of time? I can see you still haven’t learned everything about being a girl just yet. I have to help you with your makeup and do your hair! We also have to find something for you to wear. I certainly don’t have a figure like girls your age and I doubt you’ll want to wear my clothes."

I hadn’t thought of that! Duh!

“Do you have any makeup?” Mom asked me.

Everything I had ever worn was over at Mindy’s, except for the Homecoming Dress and Mindy’s slip. My makeup kit was also in my bag in Miss Benson’s office. So yeah, I was pretty much screwed!

“No, I don’t Mother. Not handy at least. My kit’s in Miss Benson’s office in school.”

“Well, you won’t need much for now, so I’ll let you borrow mine. I don’t know what to have you wear though,” Mom groused.

“I can wear what I did last night, you know my sweats and the T-shirt?”

“I guess that will have to do. But wear your grey colored one. I don’t want your — bra showing through it easily.”

Mom just got the weirdest smile on her face just then. “You know what? I’ve only known the new you for just a few hours and you’re already causing me to grow grey hairs.”
 

*          *          *
 
Mom helped me get ready with my hair and makeup and then went to get herself ready.

Mom was right! It had taken more than an hour to get ready, but we were off in the car to Mindy’s house.

I just realized something!

“Mom?” I quietly asked.

“What did you not tell me now Sweety? By the tone of your voice, it’s got to be something more about all of this.”

“It is Mom. Mindy’s Mother doesn’t know.”

“Maybe she won’t notice,” she answered with a smirk

“Uh Mom???? What about this?” I asked, pointing at my breasts and exposed navel.

“What about it? Janet is going to have to meet you eventually. It may as well be right now.”

I didn’t have the heart to tell her that she had already met me once before, except then, I was a girl named Linda.
 
 
Mom and I drove to Mindy’s and was soon at her door. Mom rang the doorbell.

“Would you get that, Mindy?” I heard Mrs. Swanson yell.

The door opened and Mindy looked first at my Mother and then at me. I could tell she wasn’t ready for what she was seeing.

“Hi Ms. Collins! Come on in,” she offered.

“Lynn told me you had quite an evening last night. How are you feeling?”

Mindy’s face lit up like a red Christmas tree when my Mother asked her that question. She didn’t know what I had told my mother and was afraid to answer or give away too much information.

“I’m okay now, Ms. Collins,” she meekly answered.

Luckily, Mindy’s Mom entered the room before anything else could be asked.

“Susan,” she gushed, and gave her an air kiss on mom’s cheek.

“What are you doing here Linda?” Mrs. Swanson asked when she spotted me standing behind Mom.

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised) Princess Found   Part 9 By Arecee   Edited and proofed by Sephrena Lynn Miller

 
“Mother! Please!” I begged.

This was not going the way it should!

“It’s what I really want!”

“And how do you know just what it is you really want?” Mom stared straight into my eyes.

“I know Mother! I AM a girl! I AM your daughter!” I forcefully raised my voice in sheer conviction.

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
“Linda?” My Mother questioned.

“Yes, she’s a friend of Mindy’s. I didn’t hear you come in,” she said looking at me.

“Umm… Mrs. Swanson… I’m not really… Linda,” I managed to squeak out before my eyes filled with tears and my throat tightened too much to talk. I just stared down at the floor.

“Mindy, what’s going on here?” her Mother asked as she turned to face her.

Mrs. Swanson’s displeasure was clearly evident on her face. It was bad enough that Mindy had gone to the hospital the night before, but now, her friend admitted to not being whom she had thought her to be, but someone else entirely, before she broke down in tears. Mrs. Swanson was looking at me with some concern as I dissolved into tears and I could almost see some pity through my blurred vision as she watched me cry.

Then it hit her!

She finally recognized who I was.

The expression on her face was fluctuating between both shock and anger. The look she just gave Mindy was frightening!

Mrs. Swanson turned and grabbed both of Mindy’s arms and pulled her face to hers until they were only inches away from each other.

“You tell me what this is all about young lady!” she snarled.

“It was only a joke, Mom,” Mindy whimpered.

“Only a joke? Only… a joke?” she said for emphasis. “For the love of God, he has breasts! I mean she… Damn! I don’t know what I mean,” she sputtered as she let go of Mindy’s arms.

Did I mention that tying my shirt up emphasized my new additions?

As serious as the situation seemed, my Mother couldn’t help but start giggling.

“Janet, calm down. It’s okay,” Mom laughed.

“Okay? For God’s sake Susan - your son has breasts!!!”

I sniffled, “They do come off, Mrs. Swanson. *sniff!* Just not right now.”

“Why not?”

“Umm…” I took a hold of the tissue my Mother passed me from out of her purse and wiped my nose. It is kind of handy having a purse! “Mindy, like, has the remover.”

“Mindy Belle, you’d better have an explanation for this!”

When Mrs. Swanson wanted to make a point with Mindy, she always used her middle name, which Mindy despised!

“Janet,” my Mom interrupted, “How about I tell you what happened while we drive over to the mall. Lynn has to find something to wear this afternoon and we don’t have a whole lot of time.”

Mrs. Swanson shook her head in disbelief as she went off to find her purse. When she came back, all four of us walked out to the curb to my Mom’s car.

“I hope you can explain this better that Mindy has,” Janet said.

“You’re not going to believe what I’m about to tell you,” Mom just groaned.

Mom and Mrs. Swanson sat in the front seat while Mindy and I sat in the back.

“Alright Susan, other than the obvious, tell me what I don’t know?” Janet said.

“I guess I should start by telling you that Lynn’s the Homecoming Princess for her freshman class this year at school,” Mom stated.

Janet’s face went back to that look of incredulousness as her eyes opened wide in disbelief.

“Did you say Princess?” she recomposed herself.

“Yes. That’s the little joke Mindy was referring to,” Mom answered.

Janet turned around in her seat to look at me, only this time, like a mother would look at one of her daughter’s friends.

I blinked my eyes a couple of times and gave her as friendly a smile as I could.

I couldn’t tell what she was thinking as she stared at me, but finally, a small smile crossed her lips.

“I can see why she won,” Janet declared as she turned back to face the front again. “Now, Mindy Belle, what did you have to do with all of this?”

“I entered Lynn in the contest as a joke. We weren’t supposed to win.”

“What do you mean - we? The way I see it, Lynn is the one that won, not you.”

I squirmed in my seat.

“But Mrs. Swanson, Mindy’s my partner. I couldn’t have done this without her,” I said.

Oops! Absolutely the wrong thing to say as I saw Janet’s face turn sour again.

“That’s just the point Lynn! I don’t understand any of this! Why didn’t you just withdraw after you had won?” Janet asked.

“We tried Mom, but Lynn didn’t want to. At first he thought he had to, after Miss Benson explained the situation we had put her and the whole school in. But later, he … sorta just wanted to do it,” Mindy said.

“Who’s Miss Benson?”

“The school Principal.”

Mindy explained to her mother how Miss Benson had originally taken to our prank, and all the events between then and why I looked the way I do today. She purposefully left out the part about Rex and Charlie at the mall; since we, well… her, she isn’t supposed to be seeing boys yet. And I’m definitely sure my mother would blow a blood vessel in her head to hear that I had already made out with a boy in a darkened theater!
 
 
Mom then filled in behind Mindy and told Janet about finding me asleep in that beautiful dress I had worn to the dance and that pretty much brought her up to date.

“Okay, so I understand all that. But why are we going shopping for Lynn now?” she asked.

“There’s one more function she has to attend this afternoon. Lynn has to go to a convalescent home at four o’clock. She doesn’t have anything to wear, so I thought it would be a good excuse for us to go shopping,” Mom grinned.

“I’m still having trouble with this. But is Lynn your son, or daughter now?”

I piped in, “Daughter, Mrs. Swanson.”

Janet raised her eyebrows. My Mother’s face had a mixed look. I couldn’t make out how she felt.

“Well Lynn, I’ll love you just the same as you were before. Don’t think I don’t want you to come over either. Feel free to as you always have, but… it will take some getting used to. You certainly had me fooled from before. I have to admit you make an extremely beautiful girl.”

I blushed. “Thank you Mrs. Swanson.”

Mrs. Swanson sighed. “I hope the both of you have learned your lesson from all of this?”

Mindy and I just looked at each other.

“Don’t play anymore pranks!”

Oh Gosh No! Never again!

I said first, “I certainly have Mrs. Swanson! No pranks from me again ever.”

“Me too Mom,” Mindy added next.

We both looked at our Mother’s gazes in the rear view mirror.

They both seemed satisfied somewhat with our responses. We just drove on in silence, listening to the car engine hum while we travelled. Finally, no longer able to keep it inside of me, I softly asked.

“Mother?”

She turned briefly around in her seat to look at me.

“I’m very sorry for having concealed all of this from you.”

I leaned forward and pressed my head against the side of her face as I felt her fingers slowly stroke my cheek.

“I didn’t want to disappoint you Mother… and… I was so afraid!” I whispered out as I kept my eyes closed tight. Mom slightly patted my cheek.

“I know Sweetheart,” she lovingly reassured me.

I really felt crappy for having hid this from her too! It was eating my heart out! Mom was the last person I ever wanted to lie to or hurt. And this had been the biggest thing I had ever done in my entire life! Call it a sense of loyalty or whatever, but I was determined to not ever do this to her again!

I know something inside her had changed too. I had sensed her sadness last night after her outburst. But now, she seemed to be a little more… enthusiastic maybe? About my situation? I really didn’t know what to think about that - it worried me.

But I did know one thing…

I loved my Mother!

I felt her hands slide away from my cheek and I sat back down into the rear seat again. Mindy gave my hand a squeeze.
 

*          *          *
 
We arrived at the mall and Mom parked in front of the Victoria’s Secret entrance from the outside.

“I won’t have you trying on clothes without the proper undergarments young lady. You need to get fitted.”

“Are you sure you want to shop here?” Janet questioned my Mother's choice of store to shop at.

“Janet, this is probably the only time I’ll ever get to do this, so I want to enjoy every minute of it. I might be spending a few dollars more than a store like Macy’s, but I can afford it and I want this to be memorable.”
 

*          *          *
 
“Miss, could you please measure my daughter for a bra?” Mom asked an attendant.

“I be more than happy to,” she replied. “Come this way.”

Mom and I followed the girl to the dressing rooms. She took a tape measure and measured me outside my T-shirt under my boobs and then across the nipples on my breasts. I was relieved when I didn’t have to remove my top! I imagined all sorts of things that could have probably happened if I had!

“Are your forms attached?” the girl quietly asked me.

I felt my face go red. How in the world did she know? I was even wearing the same bra I had worn yesterday. Then it hit me. She did this every day, all week long! If she didn’t know the difference between real and false, who would?

“Yes,” I meekly answered.

“Good, it’ll be easier to fit you then. Here, can I unsnap your bra underneath and see what the tag says?” she asked.

I blushed again. Oh God!

“Sure,” I managed to eek out. The girl led me into the changing room and shut the door. She helped me lift my shirt off and unhook the bra from behind.

“Hmm, this looks like one of ours. But this size is too tight for you. When you wear a bra, it should be comfortable and loose. Not this snug. They are meant to hold and slow the bounce, not completely immobilize movement. Wearing bra’s too tightly can cause you serious health problems when your real ones grow out too. The fluids inside have to circulate and wearing one too tight will cut the fluid flow off and let it poison you.”

She rechecked her measurements again on me with the tape measure and also measured my waist and from my hip to the inside of my leg. She then mentioned, “Is there any particular style or type that you would like?”

"Yes," came my mother's voice from the other side of the stall door,“She’d like two for everyday use, and two for special occasions. Use your best judgment."

I was like, so embarrassed!

The girl’s eyes brightened and she said, “I know just the ones that will work for you! I’ll be right back!”

She left and closed the door leaving me standing there half undressed and I just looked at myself in the mirror that hung on the stall wall.

I was definitely a very pretty girl! I mean, I really don’t see how I was seen as a boy before. I haven’t done anything really but let my hair grow long. My face is very smooth, my body frame small and lithe, and my waist was narrow. I did not have any of the rough features that most boys had. In fact, I didn’t look like a boy much at all. My arms and hands were thin and delicate. My legs were very long. I already looked like a girl in build and looks. Well, minus the breast part of it.

Then how come Mom never noticed any of this? Why is she really the only one who saw me as her son? Almost everyone else saw me as a girl.

“Here you go, your Mother can help you try these on,” she said, startling me out of my thought process. She had opened the door some and was holding the packages out towards me. I took them and then my Mother came in, closing the door behind her.

“Go ahead and finish taking that one off honey,” Mom said as she started to open one of the packages.

I felt my face return to red again. Mom was asking me to show her my boobs. How embarrassing is that? Even though they are not real, I thought of them as mine - like they were real. To me at least…

I paused longer than was necessary.

“Lynn,” my Mother reminded me, “Mothers help their daughters every day, especially when they are being fitted for their very first bra. I know this isn’t your first one, but it will be the first properly fitted one. You don’t have anything I haven’t seen before.”

I finished pulling the bra off of my chest, exposing my forms. Mom smiled lovingly towards me as I nervously did back to her.

“I remember when I was the same way with my Mother,” she grinned as she saw me trying not to cover my breasts with my hands. “My! They certainly make those things look realistic, don’t they?”

“I guess,” I mumbled, still embarrassed.

“Ok honey, turn around so I can hook this on for you.”

I turned around and Mom brought the bra around the front of me. I knew what to do already from my practice with Mindy and put my arms through the straps. Mom hooked the back and adjusted the straps. The bra was a Dream Angels pushup bra. It actually gave me cleavage! Not much, but it was noticeable.

“I sort of like this one Mother. It does fit right. And it feels good too.”

“My,” Mom said, and I could see her eyes growing moist. “I never thought I would experience this with my own child.”

I just leaned over and hugged her. Words did not need to be said.

It was a special moment.

I looked up at her smiling face as we pulled back.

“Let’s try on this other one on you,” she said excitedly as she started opening another package.

She removed the bra I had on and held up the second one for me to put my arms through. This one was very lacy, and I fell in love with it the moment I put it on! Mom said it was a Demi pushup bra. Now I knew why Mom wanted to come to this store!
 

*          *          *
 
A little while later, the sales attendant came back and tapped on the door.

“How do they fit?” the girl asked.

“Perfect,” Mom replied. “She’s going to need some panties too, so she’ll take six pair of bikini cut and six thongs. Be sure at least two match each of these two types of bra colors and the rest can be any other color.”

Woah!

“Mom! Why are you buying so many?”

“You need to be able to change every day. Don’t worry Sweety, I know what I’m doing. Just enjoy this moment Lynn - enjoy being a girl.”

And I did!

I put the first bra back on and tied my shirt under my breasts again. They looked so much nicer now with support!
 
 
After Mom paid for the merchandise, I eagerly asked, “Where to next?”

Mom thought for a moment and then admitted, “Let’s ask Mindy. She’ll know which store you will like and what type of clothes you would like as well. But I will refuse ones that look too risqué. Agreed?”

I didn’t need to think twice on that! Mom’s buying me clothing I wanted to wear!

“Agreed!” I beamed.
 
 
I walked from the dressing room and Mindy’s eyes checked me out.

“Looking good girl friend!” she complimented me.

“You’re kidding, right?” I asked, not believing my ears.

“No, really! You do. You have some ‘extra’ figure to you!” she giggled.

After settling down she asked, “Ok, where do you want to go to next Lynn?”

“I was going to ask you that same question! I know we came here before, but I don’t remember where we went. Mom said to ask you where we should go.”

Mindy looked at her watch and noticed it was already a little after noon.

“We don’t have much time. We’ll go to Wet Seal and Forever Twenty-one.”

“Lead the way Mindy,” Mom said.

Janet rejoined us and off we went.
 

*          *          *
 
I won’t bore you with the in and out of the dressing rooms. We found a really pretty pencil skirt and blouse at Wet Seal and then Mindy and I hit Twenty-One with a vengeance. I bought three skirts, two dresses, and three pairs of jeans. I wasn’t going to mention the seven blouses I bought too, because I don’t want you to think that Mom’s spoiling me. Well, she is. And she seemed to be enjoying every minute of it too! I was going to say something to her about it, like ‘Where was I going that I needed to wear everything you are getting me?’ but I just couldn’t! I didn’t want to break her trance. And yep! I wanted those clothes!!!

This felt like a dream come true!
 
 
“Lynn! We have to go! It’s almost two o’clock,” Mindy warned.

I turned to Mom. “Mom, we have to go. I only have two hours to get ready.”

Mom smiled, “Finally thinking like a girl? Oh wait, do you have shoes?”

“No, just the ones I wore last night and these sandals.”

“That won’t do! Quick, we’ll find something at Macy’s.”
 
 
We did find a pair there - well actually three pairs: black pumps with a two-inch heel, a different pair of flat sandals, and a pair of canvas shoes for everyday. Mom said two-inch heels were more than enough for a girl my age.

We were going to have lunch at the food court, but I was running out of time. So we dropped Mindy and her Mother off at their house and we went back home so I could change.

Mom suggested that I wear the pencil skirt with my new heels. I picked a blouse and soon Mom was driving me to school to meet the other girls.
 

*          *          *
 
Miss Benson had procured one of the district vans to drive us to the convalescent home. The other girls were already there waiting for me when I arrived.

“Lynn! You’re here!” Carla said excitedly.

We all hugged each other. It felt good to be back with my friends.

“Is it true? Did Jason really drive you home last night?” Tina asked.

“Yes,” I softly answered as I looked down at the ground, blushing.

“Oh God! Then what I heard was true?” Tina giggled. “Did he kiss you goodnight?”

The other girls gathered around me waiting to hear what I was going to say.

“Yes,” I breathed.

Even I was getting excited with that proclamation!

“Oooooooo! Lucky girl!!!!!God… Jason is so hot!” Tina exclaimed.

“Are you going to be seeing him again?” Melissa asked.

Hmmmmmm!

“I hope so. My mom hasn’t said one way or the other yet whether I can date now. If he asks me out, and she lets me, Yeppers!” I answered, as my heart did one of those little flip-flops when you think about the person you love!

*sigh*

“You’d be a fool not to! Jason’s really nice. I went out with him for a while until I met my current boyfriend. He’s not like some of the octopuses I’ve been out with,” Melissa related.

“I went out with the octopuses’ brother!” Tina laughed. “He couldn’t keep his hands off of my boobs!”

“What did you do?” I asked, definitely interested in the topic.

“I grabbed his thingy and squeezed it!!! Really, really hard! *laughing* and told him if he touched me like that again, he’d be joining the girls club!”

We all started laughing.

“But it feels so good when they touch me there,” Carla added.

“What???? Not on the first date! Ewwwww!” Tina responded.

“Eww? On the first date?” Melissa questioned also.

Tina continued, “Well he was definitely a jerk. He took me to a movie and thought I owed him something. So Mr. Eight hands was all over me. I’ll never forget the look on his face when I grabbed his thing. I didn’t think eyes could open that wide!” She laughed.
 
 
The van arrived just at that moment so we waited until we were seated inside to continue our conversation. Melissa and Tina sat on the forward bench; Carla and I sat behind them.

“Did he say anything?” Melissa asked.

“Not a word! His hands stayed in his lap the rest of the movie. I felt so bad for him I took his hand and held it about half way through the film. He did buy my ticket for me, but that’s about as far as it went.”

“Did he ask you out again?” Carla asked.

“Are you kidding? He couldn’t take me home fast enough! He didn’t even walk me to the door,” Tina giggled.

“What about you Lynn? Did Jason try to feel you up?” Melissa laughed.

Oh Gosh! Not me!!!! Yes, he did. But it was just a little. But I think it was me that wanted him to feel me up to. I definitely was in the mood and loved it. But do they need to know that?

“Melissa, you know she’s a virgin,” Tina reminded.

“I’m just teasing her Tina, let me have a little fun!” Melissa responded.

“All you’re doing is embarrassing her. What she and Jason did is really none of our business.”

Thank God for Tina! I was beginning to see differences in girls that I had never noticed before. Melissa wasn’t a very nice person, and Tina was quite the opposite. I really had grown to like her. Carla was… well, Carla. She was very quiet, but I think she was wilder than either of the other girls. Don’t ask me how I knew that, it was just a feeling I had about her.
 

*          *          *
 
We arrived at the convalescent home and quickly exited the van. The driver told us we had an hour to do whatever we had to do and to meet back here at the front doors.

We entered the home and were greeted by a well-dressed woman that looked as old as my Mother.

“Good afternoon, ladies! I’m Debbie Cantrell, the director of the Wellness Center for the Aged. It’s very nice of all of you to take the time to visit with some of our guests. I’m going to leave you with Gail Sanchez, my manager, and she’ll take you to see some of our more needy folks,” Debbie said, in a tone of voice I thought only happened on TV when they were trying to sell you something.

“Hi girls! I’m Gail. I have a list of your names but I don’t have a face to put them to,” she said as she looked each one of us over.

“I’m Melissa, the Queen,” Melissa stated in a tone of voice to make sure she was recognized as such.

What a bitch!!!

Snap! I don’t want to think of those bad words! But Melissa… oooo she makes me so mad!

“This is Tina, Carla, and our freshman, Lynn,” she finished with an air of haughtiness, as if she were real royalty or something. That meant we were the lowlife to her. The more I was around Melissa - the more I was starting to dislike her. Now I could see why Tina was always so abrupt with her.

“Well, come along girls and I’ll show you who each of you are to visit. Melissa, Tina, and Carla, we have the recreation room set up for you three and our patients will visit you there. Lynn, we always like to have the youngest girl visit one of our special ladies on this day every year, so I’ll be bringing you to see Irma Mac Lain. She’s ninety-three years old, and a real dear. I’ll take you to her first Lynn because I’ll have to stay with the other girls. Some of our other patients aren’t quite all there, and I have to supervise their behavior,” Gail chuckled a little nervously.
 
 
We walked down a corridor to a room and Gail lightly knocked on the door.

“Come in,” a frail voice said.

Gail opened the door and said, “Irma, here is you special visitor today! Go ahead Lynn. Come on in.”

To put it mildly, I wasn’t really sure about doing this. When Gail did her introduction, she really made me nervous! If all of these old people weren’t really all there in their minds… would one of them hurt me? Geez!

I gathered myself and slowly came through the door.

The room was small, but someone had really taken the time to make it into a home. The bed was made and pictures of family members were placed on every open space in the room. There were several vases of flowers on a dresser across from the bed. A very frail woman was looking out the window over to the garden, which had a rich variety of beautifully colored flowers.

“Come in child,” she said, as she slowly turned to face me. “I’m Irma Mac Lain. Please, just call me Irma.”

Irma was well groomed. Her hair was brushed and she had the slightest hint of lipstick on her lips. She wore a dress and what I would call ‘granny shoes’ — you know the ones with the small chunky heel? Her face was kind and I could still see the beauty within it, despite the wrinkles that had become her testament to age.

“Hi Mrs. Mac Lain, I mean, Irma. I’m Lynn Collins,” I said as I nervously extended my hand to hers.

She took my hand and used it to steady herself. Her eyes seemed to twinkle as she looked at me.

“My, my! You’re a very pretty young girl, Lynn,” she said.

“Thank you,” I blushed. I couldn’t help but smile at her compliment.

“Would you walk with me to the garden?” she asked.

“I’d be happy to,” I replied.

Irma took my arm to help her balance and we slowly walked and made our way outside to the garden. It wasn’t that far, but Irma couldn’t walk very fast either. Some minutes later, we finally made it.

“Please, sit down dear,” she said indicating a bench.

I helped Irma sit and then sat next to her. The air in the garden smelled fresh, with a variety of flower smells and just a hint of newly cut grass. The shadows from the trees made it comfortable to sit on this bench without the heat of the sun burning us.

“Is this your first time being a Princess?” she asked me as she formed a slight smile.

“Yes Ma’am. I was literally surprised when I had won. There were other girls much prettier and more experienced that should have won,” I politely replied.

“You’re a very sweet girl,” she giggled, “I remember when I was your age, long ago. I thought I was so mature then. Oh Lordy, how I tested my parent’s patience! I remember once my friend Sally Laughlin and I thought it would be fun to play hooky from school. We took the rickety old bus into the city and spent the day having fun. Well, on the trip home, the bus broke down.”

“Back then, there weren’t any radios or phones to call for help, so we had to wait until someone came by to repair the bus. We didn’t get home until after nine that night. I thought my parents would skin me alive! Goodness, I had never seen them so angry. I was grounded for weeks, and never skipped school again.”

“I’ve never skipped school. I believe in learning,” I said.

“Good for you sweetheart! Do you have a boyfriend?” she asked.

The blush factory again!!!!

I knew my feelings for Rex and Jason were more than just as friends. How should I answer that question?

“Umm, not really. I mean, I’ve gone out with a few boys, but I’m not really in a boyfriend - girlfriend thing yet,” I giggled nervously.

“That’s a smart girl! Have lots of admirers, that way you’ll be able to find the right man from the bunch. I was very much in demand before I met Mr. Mac Lain. I knew the minute I had met him, that he was the one for me. We were married for eight years before… he passed away.”

“Where did you meet him?” I asked, very intrigued.

“I met him at a dance in Hollywood. Ahhhh, those were the days! Movie stars were like Gods back then. Much different than how they were today. That’s why I was in Hollywood! I wanted to be the next Gloria Swanson.”

“Who’s Gloria Swanson?”

Irma couldn’t help but laugh at that question.

“Sweetheart, she was the Julia Roberts of her day. It’s a shame you don’t recognize her name, but I’m sure you wouldn’t know any other of the ladies I knew back then either. The men were just as popular. Oh! What a crush I had on Errol Flynn! I know, you don’t know who he was either, but he gave me the vapors every time I saw him.”

“The vapors?” I questioned. I never heard that term before.

“Oh, you young girls. I keep forgetting that you’ve never heard that expression before. I imagine you’d call it — ‘taking your breath away’ now. Well, I went to all the studios and was invited to so many parties that I can’t even remember them all.”

“I’m sorry dear, I know I’m rambling. I was at a dance in Hollywood when this beautiful man walked in. I thought Errol gave me the vapors! Well… I’ll tell you Sweetheart, I almost fainted when I first saw Mr. Mac Lain! He was so handsome! Words really can’t even describe how handsome he was. Well let me tell you, I wasn’t going to let some other girl get her hooks into him!”

“I walked up to him and looked him right in the eye and asked him to dance with me. I don’t think he could have been any more surprised at my boldness. We stayed together for the rest of the evening and he asked me out to dinner the next night. A year later we married.”

“How did you know he was the one?” I asked her, very much interested in her story.

“Honey! Believe me, you’ll know. And when you do, you’ll know what the vapors are.”

“Did you have any children?”

“Yes I did deary. We had three boys. I had always wanted a girl, but that was not to be. Grant was drafted and went away to the war. He was killed during a battle in Italy. After that, I could never be with another man. I was not going to spoil the memories I had of my husband.”

“My boys though, they were almost the death of me with all their crazy shenanigans. I still always wonder to this day… what it would have been like… to have had a daughter.”

I didn’t know what to say. Here was a woman who wanted a daughter and didn’t have that chance. It sort of humbled me some and made me feel a slight sorrow for her.

I definitely changed my opinion of this trip and what I thought about Irma.

“Was it hard for you to raise three boys by yourself?” I begged to know. If I ever have children, I had better know this stuff!

“No harder than any other woman had during those days. Grant had left me well off, but I didn’t feel right living off of the money he had left for us. So I went to work in his company that he worked for before the war. It was one of the few companies that didn’t discriminate against women. I worked hard and ended up buying the whole thing out from the stockholders.”

“Wow!! I would have never known…” I let out in amazement.

“Honey, you could do the very same thing! You know, I can tell that you are a very special girl and talented too. You’re very pretty, but beauty goes with age. Brains never do! A beautiful girl with brains can have the entire world at her feet!”

Wow!

“I want you to promise me something. What did you say your name was again Sweety?”

I said, “Lynn Ma’am.”

“Lynn. Yes! Promise me that you will take school seriously. Study hard. Don’t rely on anyone to take care of you! You can do that yourself! I see something very special in you Lynn. I’d be disappointed if you were to waste it.”

Gosh! What could I say? I was embarrassed.

I lowered my eyelids, looking down at the bench. “Mrs. Mac Lain, I don’t see anything really special about myself.”

Mrs. Mac Lain laughed.

“Of course you don’t! You’re still a young girl. But there’s something about you that an old woman like me sees. Trust my intuition, please. You’ll make me proud someday.”

I was speechless! I was a fraud sitting with the most amazing woman I had ever met, other than my mother, and she was telling me how special I was. Boy was I! And not in the way that she meant! I had to change the subject before I said something to stupid or exposed my secret!

I looked back up into her eyes. “Where are your sons now?”

“Well, Carl, my oldest, is the president of my company. He is doing a wonderful job of running it to! Harold , my second oldest, is a surgeon in Boston. And Johnny… Johnny is gone,” she started sobbing.

I leaned over and hugged her. I just had to.

“I’m so sorry,” I said, realizing that I had brought back memories that had best been left alone.
 
 
After a few minutes of holding her to me, and her sadness quelled down, I let go and she started rocking herself slightly on the bench, back and forth.

“You needn’t be sorry dear. It’s just that I’ve never gotten over Johnny’s death.”

“It was an auto accident. Johnny and some friends had gone skiing during a spring break from his college. They were on their way home when they hit some ice on the road and skidded into oncoming traffic. The car was thrown off the road and Johnny was instantly killed when it hit a tree. The other boys survived. But my Johnny…”

Tears rolled down Mrs. Mac Lain’s face again, dropping onto her lap. I felt really bad for her to relive sad memories that she had buried for so many years.

I leaned up against her and held her hand while we sat together in silence.

It’s the best way to comfort a friend and to let them know that you are there for them.
 

*          *          *
 
A nurse had walked toward us as we sat together in silence.

“Irma, I’m afraid it’s time for your visitor to leave.”

Mrs. Mac Lain looked up at her and with a hint of sadness in her voice, asked, “It is?”

“Lynn, the other girls are waiting for you,” she stated, also with a sadness in her voice. She could see that Mrs. Mac Lain was really enjoying having me with her and hated to take me away. But the driver had said - one hour only.

Mrs. Mac Lain became more animated and affirmed, “My goodness, I can’t believe how quickly time passes!”

“I had a wonderful time with you dear. But I didn’t get to know anything about you. Sometimes I start talking and I just don’t know when to stop. You could come to visit me again… that is… if you’d like,” Irma asked hopefully.

I smiled, “I’d like to do that very much, Mrs. Mac Lain. I’ll see if it’s all right with my mother. Would you like me to help you back to your room?”

“No deary, I think I’d like to sit here for a little while. You run along young lady. Remember what I told you - be strong.”

“I will,” I replied.

I hugged her frail body and then left with the nurse. I did turn around again while we walked away to see her staring off, into the patch of flowers, reliving her past.

A tear trickled down my cheek.

My meeting with Mrs. Mac Lain was having a profound effect on me. She was an old woman with wisdom, sharing it with a young girl. What she had said was for me to be strong inside. Not as a man, but as a woman. I felt sad as I turned around once more to see her before I lost sight of this woman. What was said and done was going to have a very strong influence on my life.

 

*          *          *
 
Mom was sitting in the car waiting for me when the van returned me back to school.

“How was your trip to the hospital?” Mom asked as I sat down in the front seat with her and closed the car door.

“It was wonderful Mom! I met the most amazing woman while I was there! Her name is Irma Mac Lain. She’s ninety-three years old. She told me things about herself that were almost like from out of a history book! Mom, would it be okay if I could visit her again?” I asked.

Mom got a funny look on her face.

“Please?” I tried giving her my best Bambi impression.

Her look turned into a smile.

“Of course you may. I guess this whole thing has turned my sweet son into an even sweeter daughter,” she answered wistfully.

“Thanks Mom. You’re the greatest!”
 

*          *          *
 
We returned home and I went to change into something more comfortable. I might have only been a girl for just a couple of weeks, but even low heels weren’t the most comfortable things in the world to wear for long! I changed into a pair of shorts, my flat sandals and put one of my old white T-shirt’s on and went off to help Mom with our dinner.

“Hmm, I see I have my grungy son back!” she noted with a gleam in her eye.

“Not really,” I said with a straight face. I pulled my T-shirt up to reveal my new girl’s shorts. My shaved legs and feminine shorts left nothing to explain my new entry into womanhood.

“You really have turned into a typical teenage girl,” she giggled.

I wistfully replied, “Like Mother, like daughter!”
 
 
I helped my Mother with dinner and when we finished eating, she got all serious again. We had gone to the living room and mom patted the sofa next to her.

“Sit down honey, we still have a lot to talk about,” she said.

I slowly sat down on the opposite side of the sofa - knees together, of course!

“I thought I explained everything to you last night?”

“All we talked about was how you came to be here. Now we have to discuss what’s ahead. We have some very serious decisions to make concerning your future.”

“I don’t understand Mom.”

“The first thing is your school. I know your Miss Benson has decided to have you attend as a girl until Christmas.”

“Mother, that was my decision too!” I complained.

“I’m sorry Lynn, but you aren’t old enough to make a decision like that. You’re only fourteen!”

Mom was becoming enraged again. I thought our shopping escapade had dispelled her anger, but I guess I was wrong!

“Mom, I know how I feel.”

“And, how’s that?” she irritatedly asked.

“Like a girl.”

Mom’s face went flush with anger. She didn’t say anything for what seemed to be minutes. I could see she was trying to regain control of her emotions before she said anything else.

“After all you’ve been through? I imagine you do. I’m just not convinced that you really do! But that’s beside the point right now. I’m more concerned about you and your school! Do you have any idea of the danger that you’re putting yourself in by dressing like a girl at school?”

What? Does she accept me or not?

“Mom,” I smiled, “Everyone at school thinks I have always been a girl. They all have wondered why I had been dressing up like a boy as it is.”

Mom’s mouth twitched! Just like I had seen Miss Benson do at school!

“I’d probably be in more danger now if I wore my boy clothes to school,” I finished. I hope she saw the logic to that.

“And what happens when someone accidently looks at your school records and sees that you’re a male?”

Yep! Already been through that one!

“The teachers originally ignored the ‘M’ on my records Mom. This past week, since the Coach made such an issue of it and the fact that I began dressing and attending school as a girl, instead of what everyone assumed was a girl trying to dress as a boy, the teachers were told by Miss Benson that my records were in error and that she would correct them soon.”

That was in fact, the truth.

“Oh really? Just like that?” my Mother retorted in a more higher pitched, angry sort of tone.

What the Fudge?

“And without my permission?” Mom continued, not even trying to conceal the anger in her voice. “I think NOT young lady!”

My jaw just dropped. Omigosh!

“Mother! Please!” I begged.

This was not going the way it should!

“It’s what I really want!”

“And how do you know just what it is you really want?” Mom stared straight into my eyes.

“I know Mother! I AM a girl! I AM your daughter!” I forcefully raised my voice in sheer conviction.

My Mother’s stare was unwavering, but her eyebrow did go up.

I GIVE UP!!! She hates me… how could she??? I mean... after shopping… and now…

“I…I-I’m sorry Mother. I apologize… for raising… my voice.” I whimpered.

I couldn’t hold back my tears anymore. My whole world was caving in on me! I just buried my face into arms as I turned to face away from my Mother and cried.

This was just so unfair! Why couldn’t Mom really accept the fact that I’m a girl? It’s like she wants me back as her son. And I can’t do that! I can’t!!!! I’d… I’d rather… die.

I sobbed out, “Why Mother?...Why?...Why am I not allowed… to be me?”

I clenched my eyes closed and dreaded the thought of having to try and go back to being a boy. Being miserable again. No friends. And the feeling of being caged again.

I felt my Mother’s arm surround me and pull me back towards her into a hug. I didn’t have the will to resist anymore. She started to gently stroke my hair and lean into me.

“All I’m saying dear, is that you have to give this thing more thought. It’s an unalterable life decision you are committing to. And once things are done, that’s it! You can’t just decide and go back.”

I honestly didn’t know what she was referring to as being unalterable — I mean, It’s not like I was gluing clothes onto me or something.

“Honey,” my Mother soothed as she pulled my head against hers, “This is... really difficult for me! I really do love you! It’s just… I want so much to get you back to the way you were… as I gave birth to you — as my son.”

She held me tighter for a moment and was inhaling the smell of my hair.

“I feel like inside of me that I’ve lost you! Like you died - but you haven’t. It’s a loss, and I’m hurting and I’m really grasping at straws at what to do.”

… I was speechless.

“I’m right here Mom” I quietly whined. “I haven’t gone anywhere.”

This time, I hugged her back. Even though I’m her daughter, I felt like absolute garbage for making her hurt. I didn’t want her to cry or hurt! I just wanted to be me! I only wish that she would accept me.

“I’m not doing this to hurt you or anyone. I just want to be me!” I mumbled through as I had pressed my face up into her chest.

Mom pulled back from me a little and lovingly said, “I know baby… I know.”

“Mother,” I sniffled as I lifted my head up, “you know how unhappy I was before? I didn’t feel like I fit in - anywhere. I knew that I was different and weird. I was trying to please you and what Dad would have wanted me to be. B-but… It didn’t work. I was hurting inside.”

I could see my Mother’s face softening some.

“I didn’t know what to do. It was like totally frustrating and all I could do was keep to myself most of the time. In school, I joked around to try and get the frustration out. I didn’t have any friends except for Mindy! I wasn’t accepted for what I was physically — a boy. I could never understand why back then. Boys either ignored me or gave me funny stares. The few that did talk to me on a somewhat regular basis, well, they treated me as someone regular, you know like you see every day? But not as a close friend. Not like the friends that I have now. I know now they all thought that I was a girl back then, one that was trying to either be a tomboy or rebelling against something. But I didn’t know that back then.”

“And you know what? I was like all scared when Mindy suggested this prank after my hair band broke in class. I was afraid of trying something so different and what I thought was wrong at the time. I thought I had been a boy. But after, well — this, I finally found ME! This is me, Mother!”

Mom’s eyes were moistening up. She was listening intently to my feelings.

“I enjoy looking beautiful! I enjoy others finding me beautiful. It’s — it’s I can’t describe it all, really. It just feels so right! For the first time in my entire life I feel that everything about who and what I am now, is right! I love how I am! I like how others see me! I have lots of friends now. I can talk and relate to people now. It’s like a huge rock has been lifted off from on top of me. I feel free!”

Now tears were trickling down my mother’s face.

“I really hated myself before, Mother. I hated being awake, I hated being in school. I practically kept my eyes glued to my books so that I could ignore everyone else around me. But I don’t do that anymore! I like being there and around other people now. And as a girl!”

Now my Mother rested her head against mine.

“Honestly Mom, when you look at me… do you really see me as a boy — or as a girl?”

I pushed my hand against hers and we both stared down at it. My hand was just about the same thinness and length as my Mother’s, mine being slightly smaller.

We just sort of let time stand still and enjoyed this moment with one another. I really felt so much closer to my Mother, as a person, more than at any time I could ever remember in my life. This felt so good! I should have been this way with her so much sooner!

I know she was having a hard time with accepting me as a girl. But honestly, wasn’t I always a girl inside? I thought so.

“Lynn,” my mother started, “I don’t think… I can answer that…”

I looked up into her eyes. She gave me a small smile through her tears.

“…on the grounds that I may really have a daughter.”

We both giggled and cried together.
 
 
“Lynn, honey, you and I aren’t really aren’t in any position to make this kind of decision for yourself just yet. While I may see my daughter before me and I'm trying hard to accept her, and you believe that you are a girl, I’d like a doctor to assess you and really make sure this isn’t some passing fad or misplaced notion of perception. Can we agree on that?”

I simply nodded, wiping the last of my tears away.

“You don’t have to be a girl to be accepted by others as you are now, you know?” Mom gently squeezed my hand.

I thought about that statement. That was very true! I didn’t have to be a girl for acceptance. But… then why did feeling that I was a girl so right and being a boy so wrong?

“Mom. There is one other thing though, that you should know.”

“Oh?”

“It might be better if I was a girl anyways. It would be a lot harder on me and more dangerous if I was seen as a boy… dating boys.”

Mom’s eyes widened.

“I thought you liked girls though? Oh wait! The dance… Jason.”

I slowly nodded.

“I really do love the attention of boys Mom. Girls, well, they feel like sisters to me. I don’t feel the fire inside of me when I kiss a girl that I do when a boy does.”

My Mother frowned at that.

“And I love their strength when they hold me,” I continued rather dreamily. “I just want to lose myself in their arms and let them kiss me, and…”

“Ok, ok. Enough of that imagery,” my Mother cut me off. “I know exactly what you mean. I know someone who went through what you’re going through now and I’m going to ask her whom we should see. I won’t risk taking you to the wrong person.”

“You know someone - like me?” I asked, bewildered to that fact.

“Yes Sweety. A number of years ago one of the men that I worked with told us that he was really a woman inside and wanted to become one on the outside. He was the best salesperson we had and when he became a woman, he didn’t lose his job. Now, she’s better at selling houses than she was before. When I asked her how her sales could really be so much better, do you know what she said to me?”

“No.”

“She said her customers could see the happiness and honesty when she showed a house. Before, all she was doing was making a sale, but now it’s different. She really believes in what she’s doing. I’ll talk to her tomorrow and see if she can help.”

My Mother helped me to stand up.

“And tomorrow, I’m going to have a talk with your Miss Benson. We have a lot to discuss!” Mom snapped.

“Mother? Please! Don’t be harsh with her.”

“Harsh? That’s a kind way of putting what I’m going to say to her. That woman has NO place being where she is! If it was up to me, she’d be looking for a new job!”

“But Mom!!! I am to blame, not her!”

“Really? Just how do you see that young lady?

I gulped.

“I volunteered Mother! I did! I did it to protect Miss Benson, I did it to protect Coach, and I did it to protect the school. It was my fault for doing the prank, I accepted the responsibility Mother. Miss Benson did not force me to do one thing or the other. I chose this path rather than admit to the entire school to what I had done. I couldn’t face the school Mom! I couldn’t! I was too afraid of what the boys would do to me afterwards and how everyone would treat me!”

“And I’m not doing this or going along with this just to protect everyone else anymore either Mom. I am doing this for me! Because I’m a girl, and because...well… this is really me.”

Mom slightly smiled. “Nevertheless honey, you are a child — and my child. One who may be a little more grown up than I originally thought, but still, my child. She’s an adult, and she is supposed to know better.”

“Look,” she suggested, as she lay her hand upon my shoulder, “It’s late and you have school tomorrow. We can talk about this later after I’ve talked to Miss Benson and Marilyn Grant at work. Go on to bed and try to sleep well Sweetheart.”

“Goodnight Mom.” I kissed her cheek. “I’ll try.”

My Mom seemed a little shocked at that. Her face was still a mix of emotions and I was the entire reason that she was going through what she was feeling right now.

As I got to the hallway, I paused.

“Mother?” I raised my voice some so that she could hear me.

“Yes Sweety?”

I couldn’t help but feel love for my mother because she was actually trying to protect me in her own way. She is the woman who gave birth to me and accepted me, now, as I was. And, in not so much as in really saying it, I could see that she really did like me as her daughter - just not the circumstances of how I became it.

“I love you.”

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised) Princess Found   Part 10 By Arecee   Edited and proofed by Sephrena Lynn Miller “What was I thinking? Maybe you should ask your son, or I should more correctly say, daughter, was thinking? That is entirely the pertinent question at hand,” she answered back with a calm and authoritative manner to her voice. Miss Benson was pushing all the wrong buttons with my Mother. My Mom didn’t become successful by being stupid and she didn’t like to be pushed around, not at all! “YOU KILLED MY SON! You took him away from me forever! YOU BITCH!!”

---

 
Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
I went to bed and tossed all night long. I couldn’t keep my mind off what was going to happen tomorrow! Mom was so upset! And Miss Benson was in so much trouble too! And all of this… was because of…me! The only good thing that was in sight was Mom’s mentioning of her friend at work. I hope that when all of this trouble is over, that Mom will finally understand how I feel.
 
 
My alarm sounded. Uggh! I felt as though I had barely slept!

I pushed the snooze button and rolled over. This comforter felt sooo good! I snuggled back up and let my mind relax again.

“Lynn? Up and atom, Atom Ant,” Mom called through my door.

Uggh, Noooooo!

“You have to get ready for school sweetheart. It takes longer for girls, so get your tail moving.”

*sigh* I suppose so.

I sure am not looking forward to THIS morning!

I heard Mom walk off and I rolled out of bed and hit the shower. The water felt so refreshing and warm and woke me as much as it was going to. I soaped up using my Suave Bodywash and sort of hovered and stopped as I got to my breasts. I know these were forms and were still attached to me. But I tried shoving that thought to the back of my mind as I first started slowly swirling the bodywash in a small circle above them. Then I allowed my hands to cup and spread the rest of it around them. I savored this moment and the feeling. These are mine! And I feel absolutely perfect with them.

I wondered what I was going to wear today as I stood in front of my new wardrobe hanging in my closet with the towel wrapped around my chest, dripping slightly. I finally decided on a nice skirt and blouse. I’d have to see what the other girls wore in order to make my choices tomorrow, but there was no excuse to look like the boy I had before. I carefully lay my clothes out over my bed and then sat down in my desk chair with the hair dryer and began to slowly dry and comb out my hair.

I know I must have been running slow, because Mom opened my door and looked in.

“Still not ready Sweety?”

“No Mother. I’m not feeling good about today.” I was still running the hair dryer on my hair.

My mother’s face showed a small amount of displeasure, but she offered, “Ok I’ll help you get ready then, because it’s getting close to time.”

I smiled. I liked her wanting to help me.

We finished up my hair, I got my clothes on, and she began to deftly apply a small amount of makeup on me: eyeshadow, a little blush, and a light touch of lipstick. It all added to my look and complexion and was just a hint, and not too much.

My Mother looked over her creation. I could see that twinkle in her eyes as she looked me over.

“Hang loose for a second, dear. I can see a couple of things missing. I’ll be right back.”

A few minutes later, my Mother came back with a purse and a few pieces of jewelry.

“I never thought I’d ever enjoy moments like these with you Lynn. Never,” as she packed the purse with the small makeup compact, the lipstick, a small package of tissues, and the small bottle of perfume she had used on me.

“Those are yours now. You can buy more or better ones later, but for now, that’s from me.”

My eyes watered a little. Mom was really trying hard to love me, even though I know she wanted me back… as her son. Why does love have to hurt like this?

My mother giggled a little. “Lynn, Sweety, don’t you dare cry! We don’t have time to repair your makeup. Here.”

She slipped a delicate and thin gold necklace over my head. Dangling at the end of it was a little gold cross with squares of what looked like four bar shaped crystals making up the cross with a tiny face of a caring man with long hair and a slight beard in the center. Then she surprised me and slipped a small gold ring with a tiny red stone onto a finger on my left hand. She tested it slowly at first and found that it did, indeed, fit just right, before sliding it all the way up.

Mom, sort of sniffled. “These were mine honey, from when I was little. Both of these came to me from my Mother. That ring was given to me on my 12th birthday and has my birthstone in it.”

I looked at it in wonderment and wiggled my fingers and held my hand up to let the light shine on it from different angles.

"It's beautiful Mother!" I gushed, amazed she would give me something so valuable to her!

“It’s a ruby,” she emphasized.

I didn’t understand the concept of what that was supposed to mean other than it was just the name of the stone in the ring.

“That necklace was given to me also, by my Mother, when I was seven. She introduced me to church Sunday school and I began regular attendance then. It was out of her love for me to show me the meaning of what God was in a person’s life that she gave it to me. I’m giving these, to you now, to show you my love for you, as my child… and as my daughter.”

I was choked up! I couldn’t say anything.

I hugged my Mother tightly. She rocked back and forth and smiled.

“I love you Mommy.”

Her smile was one of pride.

“I love you too Sweety.”

“Ok Honey, let’s get going. I’m going to drive you to school since we are both going to see Miss Benson.”

Yep. And all hell was going to break loose.
 

*          *          *
 
I slung my purse over my right shoulder and followed her out from our house to her car. I got into the front passenger seat, sat down properly, and buckled up my seat belt.

“Maybe being a girl is making some positive changes in you after all,” Mom giggled.

“Thanks Mom,” I smiled. I knew now Mom, really was accepting me. It was hard on her, I could see that. I was determined to not let her down ever again or disappoint her. I was going to be her perfect daughter!

“I called Marilyn and got her voicemail. I left a message for her to call me back on my cell phone. I’m going to get the name of her therapist and see if I can get an appointment for you as soon as possible. I’ll call your school if I have to pick you up early, but I seriously doubt that it will be that soon.”

Mom backed the car out of the driveway and shifted it into forward motion.

“Honey,” she more seriously said as she slowed the car down to a stoplight, “While I’m talking to Miss Benson, I would like for you to refrain from interjecting into our discussion, Ok?”

I looked down to my lap and simply nodded.

“I heard your side of what has happened. I am not blaming you at all for any of it. But I will give your Miss Benson a piece of my mind and hear what that woman has to say about why things were left to go on as they did.”

She started accelerating the car again.

“I have also been thinking, too, about your safety. I’m going to purchase a cell phone for you this morning after our meeting. It’s for you to use for emergencies young lady, and not to call your friends. Maybe later, if things remain as they are, and you still show the responsibility that you are showing now, we’ll see about letting you have more cell minutes for friends. Agreed?”

I looked over to her and smiled. “Yes Ma’am.”

A cell phone! Wow!

“Thanks Mom! You’re the greatest!” I beamed.

“I certainly hope so, especially for what you’re putting me through.”

We made a left turn. I gently squeezed her arm, reassuringly.
 

*          *          *
 
We arrived at school and Mom parked the car in the visitor parking near the Main Office side of the building. Students were disembarking buses and some were milling about in front of the school.

“You’ll have to show me where the office is dear,” Mom said as we shut the car doors and she locked them with her clicker.

Mom followed me down the sidewalk and up to the front Main doors of the school.

I had to pause as a few boys and girls passed us and said, “Hi Lynn!” “ Looking good!” and “You sure look wonderful today Lynn!” I was greeted with more than my fair share of welcomes from both strangers and friends.

Then I felt myself surrounded in a hug from behind and a giggle. “Hi Lynn! Is this your Mother?”

I turned to see Laura in a cheerful mood.

“Hi Laura!” I grinned back, “Yes this is my Mother. Mom, this is Laura, a close friend of mine here at school. Laura, this is my Mother.”

My Mother was kind of surprised at what was going on. She fumbled with what to say for a moment and then managed, “I am pleased to meet you Laura. I’m Susan Collins, Lynn’s mother.”

Laura gently shook my Mother’s hand. “Likewise. You have one awesome daughter Miss Collins.”

I then mentioned, “Laura, I may be missing my homeroom and 2^nd period classes. I have a meeting with Miss Benson and I am not sure what’s going to happen.”

Laura seemed to frown slightly, but she had that look of understanding. “Ok, I’ll tell Mr. Copeland and Mrs. Harrison you are in the office, K?”

“Thanks Laura!”

“That’s what friends are for! See ya at lunch!”

She bounded down the hallway. There weren’t any sneers or evil remarks made by anyone passing about us. A few of the boys made some wolf whistles towards me and I overheard one of them saying how much of a foxy chick I am. I know Mom had overheard it too! She was seriously at a loss.

I guess she had expected a much worse scenario?

“Mom, they all think I have always been a girl,” I whispered.

“I know honey. I’m seeing it… and for the life of me… I just don’t believe it.” She shook her head.
 

*          *          *
 
We entered the main office.

Nancy Kramer looked up from her desk behind the counter.

“Oh, hi Lynn!”

Mom asserted herself and spoke, “I’m Ms. Collins, Lynn’s Mother. I believe that we have an appointment with Miss Benson?”

“Sure thing Ms. Collins. I see its right here on her list. I can certainly see where Lynn has gotten her good looks from.”

My mother started to blush.

Everyone loved Mrs. Kramer. She was always so nice and sweet and also knew every student in the school, by name. I couldn’t help but notice a small smile on Mom’s lips with the compliment she was just given.

Mrs. Kramer went to the back and opened Miss Benson’s door.

“Miss Benson? Ms. Collins and Lynn are here to see you.”

“Send them in Nancy. Thank you.” we heard from inside the office.

“Miss Benson says to come right in,” Mrs. Kramer said.

Mom and I walked through the swing door of the counter and into Miss Benson’s office. She greeted us with a smile.

“Good morning Lynn. This must be your Mother. I’m very pleased to meet you Ms. Collins, I’m Gloria Benson.”

Mom didn’t reply just yet, but I could see her looking Miss Benson up and down. I knew what she was doing… gathering her thoughts for the battle!

I sat down in the far chair in front of Miss Benson’s desk and noticed my makeup kit! I picked it up and sat it in my lap. Mom had still not budged from where she stood in Miss Benson’s office to sit.

“Have a seat Ms. Collins,” as Miss Benson went behind her desk and sat down and pulled her chair up to the desk.

“Miss Benson,” Mom said coldly, “I can’t say anything pleasant back as far as I’m concerned. I’m sure you know why I’m here this morning, and it isn’t for any pleasantries. So I won’t waste your time or mine by beating around the bush. So I have to ask you — WHAT IN THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?”

My mother screamed that last bit.

I’m sure everyone in the outer office heard that too! I was scared!

I watched Miss Benson’s demeanor turn cold, and then to confrontational. She wasn’t used to having a parent or student question her decisions about how she ran her school. I watched her compose herself and then she spoke.

“What was I thinking? Maybe you should ask your son, or I should more correctly say, daughter, was thinking? That is entirely the pertinent question at hand,” she answered back with a calm and authoritative manner to her voice.

Miss Benson was pushing all the wrong buttons with my Mother. My Mom didn’t become successful by being stupid and she didn’t like to be pushed around, not at all!

“YOU KILLED MY SON! You took him away from me forever! YOU BITCH!!”

Miss Benson seemed slightly taken aback but held her composure. My Mother then continued.

“Listen to me Miss Benson, and you listen well! I talked to my son and he explained what happened and why he did what he did. That still doesn’t explain what you did with regards to the prank. You pretty much didn’t let my son back out of the situation he was in. It’s what is called COERCION Miss Benson! And your subtle pressure did THIS to my son!”

My Mother was pointing towards me while she ground her teeth. I was truly scared!

“It was his decision,” Miss Benson calmly answered.

“His decision? HIS? Listen to me, you little bitch! I know just how easily Lynn can be persuaded to do things he doesn’t want to do and YOU took advantage of that! You could have nipped this thing right in the bud and done the right thing. The school might have been embarrassed, Well so what? That’s the breaks! Instead, you decided to make an example of my son, and turn him into a girl! Shame on you woman!”

My mother was crying now as she let her anger all out onto Miss Benson.

“You could have suspended him for being involved in this stupid prank, but nooooo, you thought he would learn a lesson because of your perversion. What about Mindy? I don’t see her dressing as a boy for this punishment! All I see is your hatred towards my son.”

“THAT WILL BE QUITE ENOUGH MS. COLLINS! Have a seat! And I will explain JUST what happened.”

My Mother seemed to regain her composure and actually sat down.

“First off Ms. Collins, I do not hate your son! Let’s get that out of the way! The truth is, I love your daughter as if she were my very own. She is a very special child and, to the contrary, since I discovered Friday morning that this was not a second prank being pulled on me, I have now taken an active interest in protecting and helping your child.”

“And secondly, there is no punishment! There hasn’t been! Lynn insisted upon doing this.”

Miss Benson turned her computer LCD screen around towards us and set a pile of folders on her desk in front my Mother.

“I have taken the opportunity to sequester these files from Central Administration’s Records for your ‘son’s’ attendance at Central Junior High. Please look at the paperclipped notes from ‘his’ teacher’s.”

My mother looked at them in bewilderment while Miss Benson continued.

“You will notice how all of ‘his’ teachers noted ‘his’ sweet demeanor and sensitivity and continual habitual committing of pranks and joking around — even back then! A couple of them were confused as to whether he was a boy or girl back then too! But none of them pushed to do anything about it! When your daughter, and I am going to use the term daughter from here on out, because there is nothing you can convince me of otherwise at this point that he is not a she, committed this prank, she put me and the school in a bind! True enough, at that point I should have disqualified ‘him’ and accepted the runner up.”

“However Ms. Collins, young Lynn here is very photogenic and a very special girl. When she and Mindy approached me after the contest, I had already sent the winner’s photographs to our Funding Sponsors. Both Mindy and Lynn then admitted that Lynn was actually a boy and threw a wrench into everything! So just what was I thinking? I thought that young Lynn should learn a lesson about pranks. That ‘he’ should either own up to it admit to it to everyone else and it would have been over, or else go on through with the Homecoming and do her best job at it. It was never to turn your ‘son’ into a girl.”

“Now, that was my mistake Ms. Collins, and I own up to that! Your daughter saw differently and wanted to do the right thing and go through with the Homecoming pageant. It was a desire on her part and she emphasized it to me. At that time I thought your daughter was actually a boy and had a talent of pulling off looking like a girl extremely well. As long as she did not slip up and ruin the pageant, everything was going to be alright.”

“But things went wrong. Lynn never told me about being on the boy’s water polo team and heavens be! If Coach Wilson had not been anywhere as supportive as he was in squelching this, we would have had lawsuits from other parent’s on our hands as well as the school board! I had to act and act fast to suppress what could have turned into a living nightmare for your child! I did that for your daughter!”

“I have also rearranged her schedule to take Home Economics instead of anything dealing with gym or physical education for this semester and in the future. That’s for safety precautions.”

“When young Miss Swanson approached me with Lynn this past Friday so that I could evaluate just how well ‘he’ could pull this off, to say that I was shocked would be an understatement! Here in front of me, in full dress, and looking every inch a girl much older than Lynn’s fourteen years, was a real life girl! Nothing of a boy existed! What was I to do? Every inch of her demeanor and the way that she spoke and carried herself, said that she was a girl. I fully got to see how Lynn was and I was thoroughly confused!”

“Later that night, I got to thinking that perhaps those two were pulling another prank on me yet again! I thought they were acting this out to make me feel that Lynn was a girl. So when we did the photo shoot Saturday morning, I pulled Lynn aside and asked her eye to eye if this wasn’t another of her pranks! Was she really a boy or not! She admitted to me it was indeed no prank, and that she was a girl. Isn’t that right Lynn Collins?”

My Mother looked at me. I could feel the coldness of her gaze upon me. Ouch!

I couldn’t speak, my throat was constricted. So I nodded.

“Yes! And she surprised me yet again by thanking me for having let her have the opportunity to be herself and be a girl. She said I had allowed her to find her true self.”

A replay of my words. My mother turned and looked at me again.

I nodded.

“I was literally floored Ms. Collins. In all of my twenty-one years as principal of this school, I have never had a child quite like yours, nor this situation. As further proof to back up my claim, here is a copy of the portraits taken for the Homecoming court, including a special selection of shots of your daughter. I want you to take a very good look at them Miss Collins and you tell me that this is your son!”

Miss Benson handed my mother a very large manila envelope. Tears ran down my mother’s cheek as she began looking at, and then cherishing, every pose I had done that day - including the seductive pose I had laying on the floor in my dress while I was looking at the photographer. As she flipped and looked at each picture, my Mother’s hands shook.

“I honestly believe that Lynn has been a girl far longer than either you or I have suspected. The way she acted Saturday all day from the time I had seen her at the photography session until the end of that night was a like a girl freed! She was very happy and enjoyed herself. I can definitely imagine that it was a very special time for her as well. I also have a copy of the Homecoming Pageant on both VHS and DVD here for you - both at the game and after. View this with her at home at your leisure. In it, you will see Lynn in most of the filming. Apparently she had somehow charmed our senior student who was doing the video production of the event.”

Miss Benson handed a clear taped box also to my Mother.

“Ms. Collins, I sincerely did not know that Lynn was really a girl inside all along. If she is truly not, she will have fooled me for a third time. And if that’s the case, I’ll retire right now.” Miss Benson said in a more motherly tone.

I had to say something now.

“Miss Benson, yes, I have always been a girl. I just did not know I was by label and was trying to be what both my Mother and father would have wanted me to be. I just knew that it was wrong and was having a hard time dealing with it is all. I am truly sorry that this has gotten you in trouble with my Mother and I want to apologize to the both of you. My being me is important! But not to get other people into trouble!”

“I couldn’t go back to pretending to being a boy once I found out that this is who I was. It got harder every day to try and pretend that I was still a boy, Mother, once I accepted that I was a girl and that I had been suppressing it all along.”

Miss Benson then added, “And another point, Miss Collins, everyone here at this school believes that Lynn has always been a girl: even her teachers! Which brings us to this point.”

“I noticed that myself… coming in this morning.” My Mother sadly looked over to me, clutching my photographs and film to her chest and then back to Miss Benson.

“Well… things did go this far and I want to know what we can do to fix it,” Mom sadly expressed. “Lynn told me that he has to attend school as a girl until Christmas, and you want to change his records to imply that he’s really a girl.”

“Yes, but that Christmas break period change was only if ‘he’ wanted to return to being a boy. That was so that ‘he’ could leave this school at a natural break, and attend one elsewhere within the district without this event or having posed as a girl hanging over his head. I would have altered the records temporarily for the few months until Christmas and then back to male if he chose to transfer. However, I do not think that is the case any longer. I can change the records to leave ‘him’ as a girl, but there will have to be medical documentation later that I will have to submit as to why. Which, again, is the reason that I asked you here to meet with me. ”

“I’m going to be straightforward with you Miss Benson; the damage has already been done! Lynn will be attending school, probably, as a girl from now on. And I’m not very happy at all about that! Because of what’s happened, Lynn is going to begin psychological therapy sessions to find out who he really is - boy or girl. And where it goes beyond that… I… don’t know…”

I could tell Mom was holding back the tears. She didn’t want her strength to be diminished by another show of emotion. I can't same the same for Miss Benson. Her tears were running down her face and dripping onto her desk.

“Ms. Collins. I want you to know that Lynn means a lot to me as well. She has been the most intriguing and talented child I have ever run across in all my years. If you look at her grades here, you can see that she is constantly on the honor roll and excels at whatever she seems to do. She has fire and determination. And I am just as interested as you in her education and her safety. Because of her attitude, determination, grades, and willingness to pull in for the spirit of the school, and that she has charmed me as well, I will offer my support and funding to help her in her needs, even if it comes from my own pocketbook!”

“Her well being, education, and safety is my concern too. I want her to attend this school and succeed. IS that acceptable to you Ms. Collins?”

“We’ll see. I’ll talk with you again once her psychological testing is done. Then we can proceed from there.”

Mom then turned to me. “Lynn, like I said, If I call the school, I’ll be picking you up. Okay?”

“Yes Mother.”

My Mother stood up and organized the photographs back into the folder and slid the box into her handbag. She then eyed Miss Benson fiercely.

“I do expect a call from you immediately if anything further happens to Lynn. Is that understood?”

“Ms. Collins, you have my word. I’m going to look after your child as if she were my own.”

My mother headed out of the office.

“I’m so sorry Lynn,” Miss Benson then whispered to me. “If I had only known.”

I felt proud for the way my Mother had stuck up for me, but for some reason I felt really bad for Miss Benson. I don’t think she had done anything that was really wrong. But I couldn’t convince my Mother of that… After all everyone thought I was a girl anyway and all this did was confirm his or her suspicions depending on the person you asked.

“Miss Benson,” I stood up and said. “I know you didn’t mean any harm to me and I feel you did no wrong to me. What you did was allow me the opportunity to be myself. I am forever grateful to for you for that.”

My Mother paused at the doorway as I said that. She turned around and stared at me.

“And I really did enjoy being the Homecoming Princess for our school.” I finished.

Mom irritatedly snapped, “Lynn, your likes or dislikes are irrelevant! What Miss Benson did was wrong! Period! End of story! What happens next ought to be of grave concern to you since it’s going to determine who and what you are for the rest of your life!”

“Ms. Collins,” Miss Benson interjected, “I am going to help with the expenses.”

“See to it that you do Miss Benson, or this won’t be the end of this! Now I suggest that you change Lynn’s records and refer to him as a her from now on!”

“I’ll take care of it right away,” Miss Benson answered.

Mom left without so much as saying a goodbye - even to me! She was really, really angry. And apparently not only at Miss Benson… but at me, too.

“Lynn, before you go to class, I want to convey how sorry I am about all this. I should have declined letting you be Homecoming Princess. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me some day,” she said.

“Miss Benson, I’m not angry with you at all. I’m actually glad that you let me be Princess! Otherwise, I’d still be a miserable boy doing pranks trying to find out who I was supposed to be. It’s just that my Mother was really shocked the other night when she came home and found me asleep on the couch in my dress after the dance. It’s I who should be thanking you,” I endearingly said.

“For what?”

“For allowing me to find that I’m really a girl. And I am very grateful for that. I’m much happier now.”

Miss Benson went pale when I said that. She hurriedly filled out a pass slip and handed it to me.

“Here go ahead and get to class. You let me know if anything is wrong, Okay?”

“I will Miss Benson!”

I left and politely closed the door.
 

*          *          *
 
I went to my 2^nd period class and the rest of the day was pretty much the same as it had been, every day the previous week: guys hitting on me, me thinking about them (while trying to concentrate on my schoolwork) and I would join the rest of the girls for protection and began talking with them or sitting with them during lunch.
 
*          *          *
 
Susan Collins left the school rather upset. After hearing that Miss Benson had allowed Lynn the opportunity to explore and become a girl, she couldn’t see straight! The way she saw things, was that Miss Benson was wrong - no matter what! And she couldn’t help but think that somehow, she too, was at fault, for failing to pay more attention to her son. It had been awfully hard to do her real estate business to support them both, but she really never had the time to spend with Lynn and supervise things. She now deeply regretted that she hadn’t.

Halfway back to the house, Susan’s cell phone chimed. She quickly pulled over to the curb, since this was a residential area, and parked.

She flipped her phone open.

“Hi Susan, It’s Marilyn! I got your voice mail. What’s up?”

“Hi Marilyn, I really need your help. I need the number for the psychologist that you saw back then.”

“Why would you be calling Bernard?”

“Something happened at my son’s school. And now… he thinks… he’s a girl,” Susan choked out with the sadness of losing her son.

“Oh my! Susan, I am so sorry. Do you know if it was gradual or sudden?”

“I honestly don’t know. The school has records indicating it could have been long term and I just didn’t see it. But Friday morning, Lynn left for school as a boy and came home as the Homecoming Princess for his school.”

“Your son was elected Princess? How did that happen?”

“It’s a long story Marilyn and I’d like to have lunch with you one day and tell it all to you, but for now, all that I can say is that it started as a joke, and now my son thinks he’s a girl,” Susan said, as the tears began to flow.

“Oh Susan, I’m so sorry! I wish I was there to help you. Why does he think he’s a girl? Being a girl is a very large step from pretending to be a one and winning Princess. There must be more going on that he hasn’t told you. Has he told you why he thinks he’s a girl?”

“He says that he is a girl, and was never a boy. And what I don’t understand is the enthusiasm and happiness he is showing now. He absolutely loves being a girl.” Susan stated with a defeated tone in her voice.

“I want my son back…”
 
 
Marilyn kind of sighed on the other end before asking, “Susan, what has the reaction been from the other students?”

“They all thought he was a girl already. They thought he was girl trying to be a boy. His clothes just confirmed what they thought all along, that Lynn was a girl in their minds. I never knew any of that!”

“Well that sounds very serious to me. What I’ve gone through in my transition is one thing and from my experience. All I can do is reference my experience and thoughts from my point of view. But don’t you worry dear, Bernard will get to bottom of Lynn’s problem. But from me, my experience, what I am going to say to you is what the truth sounds like from my point of view, Okay?”

“I’m listening,” Susan quietly replied.

“Maybe you had better get used to having a daughter. It sounds to me like you’ve had one all along and either didn’t see it or didn’t know it.”

Susan let her tears stream forth.

A minute later Marilyn spoke again, “Look, Susan, do you have a pen?”

“Yes,” she sniffled as she opened her purse to pull it out and something to write on with.

“Let me know when you are ready, dear.”

“I’m ready.”

“His name is Dr. Bernard Kingston. He is a psychologist, downtown in the new medical facility on Third Ave. He specializes in gender disorders. Here’s his number, 555-3270.”

“Thanks Marilyn, you’re a friend.”

“I’m looking forward to that lunch Susan. I really do want to hear all about this and maybe do whatever I can to help, if you would like it.”

“Thanks Marilyn, maybe you can help. And save next Wednesday, we will have that lunch.”

“Okay dear. Good Luck!”

“Thanks Marilyn. Bye.”

Susan disconnected the phone from her friend. A little less upset, but nonetheless distraught, she finished driving home. Once there, and having settled down in the kitchen, she dialed Dr. Kingston’s office.

“Doctor’s Kingston, Brown and Sheerer. How may I help you?”

“Hello. I’d like to make an appointment with Dr. Kingston, please” Susan said.

“Do you have a referral?”

“I was referred by one of his former patients, Marilyn Grant.”

“Oh Marilyn! How is she anyways?”

“She’s doing wonderfully and very successful by the way,” Susan said.

“How soon would you like to come in?”

“Is today too soon?”

“The doctor is very busy, but I think we can manage a consultation this afternoon, let’s say at four?”

“That will work for me.”

“Good. May I have your name?”

“Susan Collins.”

“And is this for you?”

“Heavens no! It’s for my son Lynn.”

“Could you tell me the nature of your concern?”

“Lynn thinks he’s a girl.”

“I see. Well you picked the right person to work with Ms. Collins. We’ll see you at four.”
 

*          *          *
 
The final bell rang and I walked down the hallway to my locker. I had a history assignment and had to collect my history book. I saw Mindy waiting there for me. We usually take the bus home together.

“Hey Mindy,” I non-chalantly replied.

“Lynn! Tell me what happened with your Mom and Miss Benson!” Mindy demanded excitedly.

“Nothing much really, except Mom let her know how she felt about all of this.”

“That isn’t everything girl. Spill!”

“Okay, okay. Mom was yelling at Benson. You should have seen the look on her face. She said it was Miss Benson’s fault, even though I feel it’s no one’s but mine. After it was over though, I really felt bad for Miss Benson.”

“God, I wish I was there.”

“Actually Mindy, I think you were better off not. My mother was saying things I don’t think you would have wanted to hear. I didn’t like hearing them either.”

I opened my locker and removed the book I needed. I relocked it and we walked out through the front doors of the school.

I saw Mom standing there at the entrance!

“Oops! Looks like my Mom has plans for me this afternoon,” I said.

“Maybe more shopping? You lucky girl,” Mindy giggled.

“I doubt that. She spent enough on me yesterday. I’ll call you tonight and let you know what’s going on.”

“Uhmm, Okay,” Mindy sadly said, feeling left out. “I’ll see ya.”

“Hi Mom.” I said.

“We have an appointment right now at four with Doctor Kingston. I was tied up at the office with a House sale I rushed through. I'm sorry I didn't get around to calling you. We need to leave now to make it on time.”

I started following her to our car.

“A doctor? Why do I need to see a doctor? Am I going to be examined?” I asked worriedly.

“No honey, he’s not that kind of doctor.”

“What kind is he?

I lowered myself into the car and shut the door. My Mother sat down and did the same.

“Well, you did that like a lady. I’m impressed. I never taught you or asked you to sit like that and yet you have done so without fail for days now.”

“Am I going to be getting some sort of shot? I’m not sick.”

“Lynn, dear, this doctor is a psychologist. He talks to people and determines what type of treatment they need. In this case — you. He specializes in gender disorders.”

“A shrink? Mother! I am not crazy! I know who I am, and I’m a girl!”

“Honey, calm down! No one said you’re crazy. Dr. Kingston will help you better understand what you’re going through and help you determine and decide who you really are, that’s all.”

I really felt betrayed by my mother! The more she spoke, the madder I was becoming!

---

 
To Be Continued...

Homecoming Princess (Revised) Princess Found   Part 11 By Arecee   Edited and proofed by Sephrena Lynn Miller

 
I didn’t expect that! Omigosh! That’s perfect!

“Would you?” I meekly asked.

“I’d love to, more than anything in the world!”

I had the school’s best looking boy wrapped around my finger! I realized right then the power that girls had over boys. It filled me with such a thrill, one I had never felt before! Here, me, plain old Lynn Collins, had someone begging to be with me! OMIGOSH! Mmmmmm! Delicious!

“Yes,” I softly replied, letting go of his hand. BUT only so I could hug him fiercely!!!!

I looked up into his strong commanding gaze and let myself slip into his power. I felt our lips meet and his arms wrapped around me too. He pulled me up close to him and I inhaled his scent in once again. It just felt so darn right!!!!

---

Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
“Mother, no matter what he says, I will not ever go back to — being — a — boy!”

I was seriously upset! I mean… Omigod! It’s like she is trying to ram home that I shouldn’t be a girl! I leaned against the car door trying to get as far away from her as possible in the car seat. My displeasure really showed!

Mom turned her head towards me briefly, giving me a look of exasperation.

“Honey! He’s not going to make you into anything! This is just a preliminary session for him to see if he will take you on for a full psychological assessment of yourself.”

“I know what he’s going to say too: ‘You’re a boy, suck it up!’ ” I grumbled.

“Lynn, Marilyn wouldn’t have recommended him to me if he was the way you just described him. Please, for me, just give him a chance?”

I crossed my arms and pouted.

“Honey,” she said more frailly, her voice cracking, while she steered up onto the freeway, “You are my only child! You have no idea what you mean to me! What you are doing and going through is life changing! You cannot go back once you go through this process! In my mind, since I love you so much, Lynn, I need to be certain that you are certain of what you are about to do!”

I swallowed and looked back over to her.

“I…I..,” she stammered for a moment. “I lost your father be-because of his macho BS. He decided his self esteem and rushing to judgment before examining options was the only way. I won’t lose you too!”

I couldn’t keep my eyes from trying to water as I looked ahead at the traffic in front of us on the road, moving. I knew that my Mother was hurting deeply inside. I was the cause of it too. I had to know something else too.

“Mother?” I softly questioned.

“Yes sweetheart?” she replied while negotiating moving back over into the right lane to let other cars behind us pass on by.

“You are trying to help me?”

“Yes!” she quickly emphasized.

I then probed, “Are you going to let me be who I decide to be? Not force me to be something I’m not?”

My Mother stifled a laugh and I could see a few tears going down her cheeks.

“Lynn, honey, I will never force you to be anything! I want you to be who you want to be! I am going to admit this is very hard on me. I lost my son and got a daughter in exchange. I am here to support and protect you. All I am doing is doing what any responsible mother would do: protect her child! I am going to get a professional opinion about your thinking so that somehow, through all of the questioning this doctor is going to ask you, that you take a good hard look at yourself and make sure that being a female is what you really want in life. And I want to hear what he thinks about you in the end.”

“By doing what you want to go through, you know, you won’t be able to have any of your own children. That option will be removed from you, forever. You can adopt, but you won’t be able to go through what most natural born women do in having a baby. That just is not possible yet.”

Hmmm… I thought about that for a moment. It was slightly spooky to think about in a way. I mean, I never thought about having my own children. Did I really even want my own child? Hmmmm… Mom just gave me something new to think about this. I released my arms into my lap and sat up more straight.

“Ok Mom. I’ll try. I promise you… I will try.”

“Thank you sweety. That’s all I have ever asked of you.”

My Mother smiled for the first time today since earlier this morning.
 

*          *          *
 
We arrived at Dr. Kingston’s office. It was located in an airy two-story building with and atrium in the center. There was a waterfall and a small stream running from one end to the other. The stream was bordered with trees and flowery bushes. This wasn’t anything like my other doctor’s office - you know, the one in a sterile box?

We opened the door to his office and entered the reception area. It was as nice as the atrium. The walls were painted a warm beige color. There were pictures everywhere, of ballerinas, flowers and happy nature scenes. There were live plants in all the corners of the room. It was peaceful in here. Mom walked to the reception window and rang a bell.

The attendant returned and asked, “May I help you?”

“Yes, we have an appointment with Dr. Kingston for Lynn Collins,” Mom replied as she sat her purse up on the counter.

“Dr. Kingston will be with you in a few minutes. He’s just finishing with another patient. Here are the forms that need to be filled out,” the receptionist said as she handed my Mother a clipboard with a few papers attached.

Mom and I went over and sat down on a light brown sofa to wait. She was hurriedly filling in the papers while I grabbed a fashion magazine from the end table beside me. I started flipping through the pages and began to really enjoy looking through it. The girls posing in its pages had different hairstyles and clothes that I really liked. I found myself wishing I could wear some of those dresses that showed off my arms and legs. God! I could just see myself in some of those! Mmmmmmm!

My mother turned in the clipboard and returned to sit back down with me. A few minutes more passed before the interior door opened and a man around six feet tall entered the room.

“Ms. Collins? I’m Dr. Kingston,” he said, and extended a hand to my mother.

“I’m pleased to meet you,” Mom said, as she took his hand in hers.

“I understand one of my former patients recommended me for a consultation, Marilyn Grant?” he asked.

“Yes, she did.”

“How do you know Marilyn?”

“We work together.”

“I see. Let’s step in to my office and I’ll see if there is anything I can do to help your situation.”

Fudge! I had to put down that wonderful magazine and go towards my doom!
 

*          *          *
 
We followed Dr. Kingston back to his office. It was a little darker than the reception area, but it still felt peaceful.

“Please be seated,” he said motioning toward two chairs as he shut his door to the office. “What brings you here today? I assume this is your daughter,” he said.

“Doctor, this is Lynn, my child, and she wants to change her sex,” Mom blurted out without thinking. “This whole thing is confusing for me and is very stressful. I just don’t know what to do!”

“Well, maybe we can sort this thing out, Ms. Collins. First though, Lynn, I have to ask you — ‘Why would a pretty girl like you want to be a boy?’ ”

I had been sitting there, minding my own business, figuring that Mom and the doctor would do all the talking. My attention had been drawn to one of those desk fountains, you know the ones that gurgle softly and never seem to run out of water. When the doctor asked me that question I nearly fell out of my chair.

“Y-y-yo-you think I want to be a boy?” I stammered incredulously.

I got a little defensive right there.

“Umm, Dr. Kingston, I am a boy! I want to be a girl!”

The doctor’s expression changed and it seemed like his face got all flustered and he readjusted himself in his seat. After recomposing himself, from what I assumed was embarrassment on his part, he said.

“I’m very sorry about that Lynn. It’s not very often that a patient fools me, but you certainly fooled me today! My, my! Are you sure Marilyn isn’t playing some kind of prank on me?” he asked, with a chuckle.

“No Doctor. This is no prank - even though all of this started out as one,” Mom replied rather angrily.

I really felt uncomfortable now.

“No offence meant Ms. Collins, but knowing Marilyn as I do, she was a special woman, and funny to boot. Ok Lynn, How about you tell me a little bit about this situation your mother is describing. I’d like to know more about the person I’m going to treat.”

“There’s nothing much really to tell. I’m a fourteen year old girl,” I snapped, “and I know who I am!”

“Lynn! You promised to cooperate. And no one has said or even thinks that you’re crazy,” Mom fired back.

“I’m here aren’t I?”

“Lynn, I’m not that kind of Doctor. I don’t let the crazies come around in here. They’re too much work!” Dr. Kingston laughed.

“Then why am I here?” I asked.

“Well, I suppose because your mother made an appointment and you were referred to me by Marilyn, one of my star patients. Has your mother told you about her?”

“Yes,” I said.

I started pouting again. I really couldn’t bring myself to admit that I needed help with my transition.

“Good. Now look Lynn, we aren’t going to do anything today with regards to your file. I just wanted to get to know you a little better before I decide whether or not to take on your case. From what I can see you’re very defensive about me, or what I do here. What do you think is going to happen if you start to see me?” he asked.

“You’re going to try and make me go back to being a boy,” I grumbled.

“Goodness, who told you that?”

“No one,” I pouted.

I don’t know why, but I was scared. It’s like my life was going to be decided by someone who didn’t even really know me! I know Mom promised to let me decide, but, being here, in this office, with a shrink, scared me!

“Well next time you see No one, you can tell him from me, that I’m not like that. What I do Lynn is help you find your way down a path. You’ll decide what path you want to travel, and I help you to get to where it leads you. The thing though, is that every path has other paths leading off of it and we’ll explore those too. What you’ll do is travel each path to find who you really are. You’ll be the one to decide that.”

“Do you promise not to make be go back to being a boy?”

“I promise! I only help you to find your real self, whatever that may be, and help you understand what you are trying to do. And from the looks of things, I doubt you’ll be finding a boy under that makeup. I certainly don’t see one. So, would you like to see me again?”

“I guess so.”

“Good. I’ll have my assistant block out an hour twice a week for the next two months. By then we should have a pretty good idea as to who Lynn Collins is. Do you have any questions Mrs. Collins?”

“Just one. How much is this going to cost?”

“I’ll have my assistant give you a fee schedule. If there’s a problem with it, I’m sure we can work something out. Lynn’s health and future is too important to worry about fees.”

My mother added, “I do know a certain someone who will certainly be paying your bill, Doctor Kingston. And, Thank you.”

Doctor Kingston appeared puzzled at my Mom’s statement. But I certainly knew who she meant — Miss Benson.

“I’d like to start seeing you Lynn, tomorrow, if that’s not too soon?”

I relented, “That’s fine with me sir.”

“Good! That way you’ll have me on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Is four-thirty okay Ms. Collins?” Doctor Kingston turned to my Mother.

“That will work fine. I don’t want her to miss school.”

“Good! I’ll see you tomorrow Lynn. And please, there is no need to be afraid.”

I sort of looked more demure and apologetic. I guess, maybe, I had been wrong about him?

“Thank you Doctor. I’m sorry for… earlier. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
 

*          *          *
 
Mom and I left the office and returned to our car. Mom backed up and then pulled out from the parking lot onto the street before we talked.

“Well sweetheart, that wasn’t so bad was it?”

“No Mom, it wasn’t. I’m sorry too. I was scared.”

“I’d be more worried if you weren’t! What do you think of Dr. Kingston?” she asked.

“He’s okay, I guess,” I replied.

“You like him, don’t you?” Mom asked.

“He seems nice,” I answered guardedly.

My Mother turned left at the light and was heading back towards the freeway ramp.

“Come on Lynn! You have to admit Marilyn’s choice of a doctor could have been a lot worse,” Mom emphasized.

I knew I was losing this argument. I really didn’t want to see anyone about being a girl. I just wanted to be left alone. It was no one else’s business what my thoughts were. I’m already a girl as far as I’m concerned. So why discuss it?

I sat in silence for several minutes pondering over what Mom had just said. I wondered why I was being so stubborn about this? Was I really afraid that Dr. Kingston might find that I was really a boy and that I was fooling myself about being a girl? Was I really old enough to know who I was? Dr. Kingston seemed nice enough, and he said he wouldn’t make me be a boy. Mom said she would let me decide who I wanted to be too. I guess I’ll trust him for now, and besides, what harm could come from talking to him?

“You know what Mother? You are right. I’ll see him, and he really doesn’t seem that bad a person either.”

“Good girl.”

I felt a pang of guilt.

“I guess I owe you an apology too. I’m sorry Mother.” I gently squeezed her right arm and leaned into her a little on her side. “I’ll make it up to you tonight too. Dinner and cleaning up the living room?”

My Mother smiled. “Deal.”
 

*          *          *
 
I called Mindy the moment I got home. Mom went into the living room.

“Hello?” Mindy asked, as she picked up the phone.

“Hi Min. It’s me.”

“Lynn! What happened?”

“I saw a shrink today, he seems to be nice.”

“You did?” she asked in that excited way, asking me to spill it all. I could just imagine her ear glued to the handset of her phone.

“Yep. Mom wants a professional opinion on whether I know if I’m really a girl or not.”

“Geez Lynn! If that isn’t obvious by now, it never will be!” she giggled.

“Mom also seems to be getting better about me. She seems to be more upset by how I became a girl, not that I am one.”

“Great! Oooooh yeah! Guess who called me today?”

I puckered my lips, thinking.

“I give. I don’t know. Who?”

“Charlie!!!!! And do you want to know why?” Mindy giggled.

“Why?”

“He said that Rex wants to see you again!”

“Rex… wants to see… me?” I gulped.

“You silly girl! Of course he does! Who wouldn’t want to be seen with a Princess?” Mindy laughed.

“You know I’m not allowed to date yet,” I reminded her, “Not even as a boy.”

“I know that. But it wouldn’t hurt to in-no-cently happen to run into the boys at the mall while we shop, now would it? You know… just by accident?” Mindy giggled nervously.

“You’re not supposed to be dating either are you?” I replied, hoping she would take the tact I was hinting at.

“You know I’m not! That’s exactly why it’s so much more exciting when we do!!!”

Oh no!

“I don’t know Mindy… what if we get… caught?”

“We won’t! If the boys take us to see one of those scary films, you know the kind your mother nor would my parents would ever go see?, we’d be fine. Think about it, Ok? Rex really does likes you.”

Fudge!

“I like him too Min, but… *sigh* I like Jason also.”

“Jason’s too old for you!” Mindy snickered.

“But he’s so cute! And his kisses make me melt!”

“Kisses? I thought he only gave you a tiny goodnight kiss?” she asked, realizing that more had gone on than she had originally been told.

I felt myself go red.

“Umm, yeah! That’s what I meant,” I quickly stated, trying to hide what actually went on.

“No you didn’t! Lynn Collins! Now spill!”

“Okay,” I almost shouted.

Mindy sure can be irritating about knowing every last detail to something!

I lowered my voice not wanting my mother to hear. “He like kissed me more than once. It was alllll night long! Oh Mindy, I started to pass out several times from his lips and touch! He was magical!”

“Woah! Was he better than Rex?”

“God yes!!! I could let Jason take me into his arms and… and...” I sighed.

“I hate to pop your bubble girlfriend! But I doubt you’ll be dating Jason any time soon! So you might as well come back down to Earth and get used to Rex’s sexy lips,” Mindy laughed.

Why did she have to go and ruin my fantasy? Geez.

“I guess I’ll have to. I have to go fix dinner. I’ll see you tomorrow at school.”
 

*          *          *
 
School was pretty much the same thing again: guys hitting on me and me joining other girls socially. I was finally starting to gather a large group of friends, but none that I would call close enough to share my secrets with. I did that only with Mindy. Not the boy thing either - but my feelings for Jason and Rex. Maybe when I get to know them better I will, but not right now.

Mom picked me up after school and drove me back over to Dr. Kingston’s office. I didn’t have to wait to see him so I was ushered directly into his office. He had requested my Mother to wait out in the lobby. It seems he wanted to talk only with me for now.

“Good afternoon, Lynn. How was your day?” he asked.

“Hi, Dr. Kingston. It went okay,” I replied.

“No bad things? Everything went fine?”

“Yes sir.”

“Good. Before we start, I want to lay down a few ground rules first. When you come here, I’ll ask you how your day went. I’m not trying to pry into your life, but what you tell me will give me some feel for your answers as we travel down the path that I told you about. I want you to be truthful with me and you need to know that none of this will pass beyond these walls, not even to your mother. The only thing I will tell her is whether I think you’re a boy or girl and why at the end of all of our sessions. That’s all. I want you to feel safe here, because it’s your place to be whoever you want to be. It’s important that I have your trust and you to be truthful in order to be able to analyze you’re your thoughts and help you decide where you want to go. Are you okay with that?” he asked.

“Umm, I guess so,” I answered.

“That’s all I can hope for. Remember, Lynn, trust is the most important part of your discovery. It might take a while, but you’ll eventually trust me. Now, I have to learn a little more about you. All I’m going to do today is learn about Lynn Collins. All the easy things, like how old you are and who you live with, what you like and dislike; stuff like that.”

“Okay,” I tried cheering myself up as I looked at him.

“Good. Let’s start with how old you are?”

“I’m fourteen.”

“Have you been fourteen for very long?”

“No, my birthday is August Twenty-ninth.”

“I see. I’ve met your mom, how about your dad? Does he live with you?”

I felt uncomfortable with that question, and it was only the second one. Dad is a real sore spot for me! I couldn’t answer that one because there was so much negativity about that. If things were going to be like this, I’ll tell Mom to find me someone else!

“No,” I bitterly answered.

“I’m very sorry Lynn. I’m not trying to upset you at all. I need to know these basic things about you. If you don’t want to answer a question, you don’t have to. Okay? Only answer what you feel comfortable with.”

Well, I guess he does in a way need to know. I’ll only stick to the ones I feel okay with.

“Okay. My dad left us when I was a little boy.”

“I see. Do you and your mother get along okay?”

“Oh yes! I love her very much,” I gushed.

“And why’s that?”

“Because she’s always there for me! Even now, with this,” I said, as I moved my hands up and down in front of my body.

“So your mom is very supportive of you?”

“Yes sir.”

“Do you have many friends?”

“Before this, no. Not really. I have made a lot of friends, though, since winning Homecoming Princess. Mindy’s been my best friend throughout most of my life.”

“Did you have any boys for friends before you became a girl?”

“No, not really. I talked to a few occasionally, but they weren’t real friends.”

“So Mindy’s been your only friend all this time?”

“I guess.”

“Why didn’t you have any boys for friends?”

“I don’t know. I never felt comfortable with them. It seemed like I was sort of like alien to them. I wasn’t one of them. I sort of stayed away from them. I was more comfortable being around girls, well, Mindy that is. I always liked to hang out with her.”

“Do you like any sports?”

“I like water polo. I was on the school team before I was voted Princess.”

“What happened?”

“I got kicked off after I won. The coach thought I was a girl, pretending to be a boy, swimming without a top on.”

Doctor Kingston tried to suppress his laugh.

“My word! I can see where that might be a problem! How do your other classmates view you at school? Are you liked or disliked?”

This was easy.

“Well sir. Everybody seemed to think I had been a girl all along, trying to be a boy. I wasn’t noticed much before this — prank. Afterwards, and dressing as a girl, I do have a lot friends. I’d say almost everyone likes me.”

“Is there anything that you like or dislike?”

“Like what?”

“You know, dancing or some type of food, maybe just everyday things?”

“Umm, I don’t like liver — yuk! And I don’t like okra either, because it’s slimy. I love to dance, and I love to shop,” I blushed.

“What girl doesn’t?”

And so it went, question after question. I found that I was becoming more at ease with Dr. Kingston. I felt as though I was talking to a friend.

“Well, that’s all for today, Lynn. I’ll see you Thursday, and remember what I said, about trust.”

“I will Doctor,” I grinned with my biggest smile.
 

*          *          *
 
Mom was waiting for me in the reception area.

“Well, how did it go?” she asked.

“It went great. Dr. Kingston is really nice,” I replied.

“See? Didn’t I tell you that Marilyn wouldn’t steer us wrong?”

“Yeah, it seems I had been wrong.”

Mom eyed me as she sat up from the couch.

“And Mother? Thank you soooo much!”

“For what?” she pried as she slid her purse up on her shoulder.

“For putting up with me,” I guiltily admitted.

Mom just hugged me. “You better believe it daughter of mine! It’s called love.”

I hugged her back.

Everything seemed to be going just right! And yes, I love my Mom!

We exited the building and headed to our parked car.
 

*          *          *
 
Wednesday started like any other day at school. I was feeling sassy and wore a skirt and blouse with my new heels. I had to admit that I did look great! Even Mr. Copeland couldn’t help but comment on how nicely I had dressed. I blushed from all the comments he and everyone else gave to me all day long. Why hadn’t I been a girl so much sooner? I feel so alive now and actually enjoy life and being in it!

I joined Mindy and some other girls at a table in the cafeteria to eat lunch. We had been there for only about five minutes before I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned and almost fell off the bench.

OMIGOSH!

“Hi Lynn. May I sit here with you?” Jason asked.

Oh my God! Oh my God! Jason wants to sit next to me at school!!!!!

I started shaking.

“S-s-su-sure,” I answered a little dreamily as I scooted over a little bit to let him sit down and his lunch tray beside me.

“You look really nice today,” he complimented me as he took a bite of his chicken fried steak.

“I do?”

“Are you kidding? Lynn, you are, by far, the most beautiful girl in this school!”

EEEEEP? …

“I am?”

“Yes! I wouldn’t say it if it wasn’t true,” he managed to say before scooping a mouthful of mashed potatoes.

Oh Snap! Is he such a gorgeous boy! I know I’m in love with him now!
 

*          *          *
 
At this point Mindy kicked my leg underneath the table. I had just been sitting there and staring at Jason. So far, my conversation had consisted of four small sentences, mostly answering. I don’t know how I do it, but somehow I have the knack of charming the heck out of this handsome boy, I so obviously liked!

All of my girl friends eyes were turned toward Jason and me, ears perked, to see what brilliant remark I might utter next! To make things worse, I was blushing furiously at this point.

“Umm, thank you so much… Jason. For bringing me home, you know, after the dance?” I managed to finally say.

“It was actually all my pleasure. I couldn’t leave a damsel in distress, now could I?” he smiled. I swear his eyes actually twinkled at me in the sunlight streaming through the windows onto our table!

My stomach felt as though it was filled with butterflies!!!!!!

How could a guy have such an effect on me?????

I’m just a fourteen year old girl!

Oh wait!

Duuuuhhh!

That was the key!

I’m a girl!

Wanting to be with a boy is as natural and as old as time itself.

“No, I suppose you couldn’t,” I giggled, nervously.

“Would you like to take a walk?” he asked, having finished his lunch in like 3 minutes. I had barely touched my spaghetti, much less the Caesar salad I had picked out.

I looked at Mindy and the rest of the girls. They were hanging on every word we had been saying and waited anxiously to hear my answer.

Of course I want to!

“I’d love to!” I anxiously blurted along with my biggest smile. Oh god! I said that like I was too eager! Snap! Now they all know I love him!

Jason took my hand and helped me up from the table. He’s such a gentleman! Wow! I noticed much to my excitement that he didn’t let go of it; in fact he intertwined his fingers within mine as he led me away from our table and out of the cafeteria. My heart was beating so loudly that I was surprised the whole school didn’t notice!!!!

Jason led me to a bench in front of the school.

“Let’s sit,” he said. Noppers! He didn’t let go of my hand!

“Okay,” I responded in all my great wisdom.

He sat next to me and then turned to face me. The soft breeze was caressing my face and my hair was being gently pulled back by the breeze. The sun was warming me all over. At least I think it was the sun, but maybe it was something… else?

“Lynn, I hope you don’t mind me saying this. But, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since the dance,” he admitted.

WOW! I haven’t been able to either!

“Jason,” I sighed and was about to continue about how I felt, but Jason interrupted me.

“I know your mom won’t let you date, but maybe if she met me? She might change her mind?”

I really didn’t know what to say. Jason was making my life so confusing!!! I took my other hand and placed it overtop of the one he was holding my other hand with. I raised it and clutched our hands to my chest, hugging it for all it was worth!

I wanted so badly to see Jason again!!!! But HOW???

‘Mom, would it be all right if I went out with the most gorgeous boy in school? Never mind that he’s three years older than me and he doesn’t know the truth about me. Can’t you just forget about that sixteen year old rule, Please? Prettttyyy pllleeeaaaase?’

Yeah, like that’s really going to happen.

I felt like crying. Life is so unfair.

“Jason, I wish I could, but I know my mother… and I know… what she’ll say,” I responded sadly.

“Could I at least drive you home from school today?” he asked expectantly.

I didn’t expect that! Omigosh! That’s perfect!

“Would you?” I meekly asked.

“I’d love to, more than anything in the world!”

I had the school’s best looking boy wrapped around my finger! I realized right then the power that girls had over boys. It filled me with such a thrill, one I had never felt before! Here, me, plain old Lynn Collins, had someone begging to be with me! OMIGOSH! Mmmmmm! Delicious!

“Yes,” I softly replied, letting go of his hand. BUT only so I could hug him fiercely!!!!

I looked up into his strong commanding gaze and let myself slip into his power. I felt our lips meet and his arms wrapped around me too. He pulled me up close to him and I inhaled his scent in once again. It just felt so darn right!!!!

Our tongues intertwined! His tongue tasted like a sweet candy to me!

OOoooooo! I melted!

I don’t know how long we stood there kissing and holding onto each other, swaying against the breeze, but the warning bell rang.

Fudge! Fudge! Fudge!

Jason took my hand again and walked me back into the school building.

“I’ll meet you here at three-thirty,” he eagerly said.

COOL!

“Okay” I smiled as I reluctantly had to let go of his hand.

I walked towards my locker and, then on impulse, turned back around to see Jason before I went around the corner in the hallway. He had been watching me the entire time!!!! Omigosh! I got a warm squishy feeling in my stomach! I smiled and gave him a small wave as I walked on and disappeared around the corner.
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy was waiting next to my locker when I got there.

“Oh my God! LYNN tell me everything! I can’t believe it! Jason Carlson. Oooooooo, I’m so jealous!!!!” she pouted.

“Where do I start?” I dreamily teased her, “He’s so cute. He makes my whole body sing. AND he’s going to drive me home after school!!!! Is that okay with you?”

“Are you kidding? If Jason asked me I’d be hanging onto his leg,” she laughed.

“Then you’re not mad that I’m going with him?”

“You’d be a fool not to girl. But remember Rex this weekend.”

“Yeah.”

Mindy merely shook her head as she went on over to her locker.

I opened my locker and took the books I needed for my last two classes of the day. I could barely think of anything else other than Jason.
 

*          *          *
 
Three-thirty came and I ran down the hallways to meet him. He was all smiles when he saw me running, my skirt molding to my legs. He took my hand into his and led me over to his car. I remembered his car from the other night! It was a Honda Civic. Jason opened the door for me and held my hand while I sat down in the seat, smoothing my skirt before actually sitting. I turned my legs in as he shut the door.

I noticed that my skirt had ridden up my legs several inches above my knee. I pondered whether or not I should pull it back down and decided that my mother would have a fit if I didn’t. I pulled it down almost to my knee!

I know it was a compromise, but a girl has to do what a girl has to do.

Jason had walked around the car and climbed inside.

“Do you have time for a Coke?” he asked.

“Sure,” I answered.

“I’m really glad you decided that I could drive you home with me,” Jason lovingly said.

“Thank you for asking me. I really wanted you to as well.” I responded.

“I know I told you this already, but I haven’t stopped thinking about you since Saturday,” he said reaching across the console to take my hand again.

I was like a deer frozen in a headlight! I was his!

I slid as close to Jason as the consul would allow.

“I’ve thought about you too,” I responded. Boy, did I ever!!!!!!!!!!!

“I can’t believe you’re only a freshman. You seem so much older.”

“Do I really?”

“I thought you were at least a junior.”

I was blushing furiously. I wasn’t used to nice things being said about me, and yes I was reacting like any fourteen-year-old girl would!

“I really feel older when I’m with you,” I gushed.

“That’s why I want your Mother to meet me, do you think she will?”

“I’m sorry Jason, but my Mom would have a fit.”

“Well,” he conceded, but still with a great smile, “at least I tried.”
 

*          *          *
 
We reached the hamburger stand and Jason went to buy us our Cokes. Jason returned and handed me my drink.

“Do you have Copeland?” he asked.

“Yes, how did you know?”

“Everybody has Copeland. I think its part of becoming a person. I had Copeland and my mother had Copeland. The only reason my dad didn’t is because he’s not from here,” Jason laughed.

“Has he been around for that long?” I asked. I started to think like maybe he was some sort of lab experiment from the fifties that survived that long and was like an undead thing still roaming the school.

“I heard a rumor that his mother had him here instead of the hospital,” he laughed.

“Snap! No wonder he’s so old!” I giggled.

“Who else do you have?” he asked.

“After Copeland, I have Mason, then Hotchkins, and after lunch - Keatman, and Peters.”

“I had Hotchkins last year. She’s a really good Math teacher. You must be taking Algebra.”

“Yes, what did you have her for?”

“Advanced Algebra. I wish I had her for Trig, but I ended up with Curling. He’s a jerk. At least with Hotchkins, she’ll help you after class, but Curling tells you what page to find your solution on and walks away.”

“God, that’s awful!”

“Everyone has a jerk teacher. Who’s yours?” he asked.

“Definitely Mason. She’s always yelling at someone. And any little thing I do, she seems to target me. She has sort of calmed down since I — well, started dressing nicer.”

“Is she new? I never had her.”

“She transferred here this year from some school back east. Someone said she taught at one of those schools where half the girls are pregnant,” I laughed.

“What about you? Are you going to go to college?”

“I hope so. I’m trying for a scholarship so I won’t be a burden on my Mother.”

“That takes straight A’s and involvement in school activities to do.”

“Mmmmm hmmm! Im a 3.9 GPA and with my extra credit class I signed up for after Christmas, I’m hoping to make a 4.0.”

Jason put down his drink and took my hand back into his… finally!

“I’m still really trying to get used to being in high school,” I more softly said, reveling in the feel of his hand caressing mine.

“Hey, you know they’re having tryouts for the school play next week. We could try out together, and then I’d have an excuse to drive you home everyday after rehearsal.”

“But my Mom…” I weakly whined.

“It wouldn’t really be a date. We could just drive really slow on the way home.”

Didn’t I tell you he had such cool logic?

I couldn’t help but giggle at that and imagining being in the car with him! I gently squeezed his hand.

Jason has nearly won my heart! And I don’t know what to do about it. *sigh* I shouldn’t even be here, but God! I think I actually love him!

“We should be going now. My Mom will be home soon and I don’t want to be in trouble,” I reluctantly pleaded with him.

“Okay, let’s get you home,” he gentlemanly replied as he helped me up from the chair.

I loved my hand being held by this man!
 

*          *          *
 
Jason drove right up to my house and shut the engine off.

“Thank you for the ride,” I grinned.

“You’re more than welcome. Can I give you a ride tomorrow?”

“No, my mom’s picking me up for an appointment. Maybe Friday though?”

“That’s cool! Would it be okay if I kissed you goodbye?”

I didn’t have to think twice about that! I leaned over right in front of his face.

“Oh yes!”

Jason pulled my mouth to his and we touched lips. My body turned to jelly with his touch! If this is what love is, then I’m definitely in love! Our lips parted and then Jason kissed me again, only this time, much longer!

“I should be going in,” I panted, when our lips parted again. Oh Wow! This is like so unreal! I feel fantastic!

“Yes, I think so. I do not want to get you in trouble at all.”

Always the gentleman!

Jason walked around the car and opened my door. He held my hand again and helped me from the car. Jason’s arm went around my waist as he walked me to the door.

“I had a really great time with you today, Lynn,” he beamed with pride.

“Me too,” I squeaked.

I removed my house key from my purse and inserted it into the door lock.

“Thank you so much! I had a wonderful afternoon!” I breathed.

“You’re most welcome Lynn,” he replied.

He then lowered his head down to mine and kissed me again.

---

 
To Be Continued...

I turned to face her and sat up, still sniffling. “Lisa, you want to know why I dressed as I did? I had an abusive father when I was little. Much of what he did to me scarred me mentally. I dressed like a boy because he wanted me to be more like his son. Even after he left my Mom and me, I still couldn’t break out of that mindset. I continued to dress like that so people could like leave me alone. I joked around a lot, you know? I tried to give a reason for my even being here in school. I studied and poured myself into books so I could ignore other people. I got good grades for being so attentive to the textbooks. I ignored everyone else!”

“And you know what? I hated it!”

---

 
Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
I watched dreamily as Jason walked back to his car. Every few moments he turned around to glance back at me, flashing his smile.

Omigosh! Butterflies tingled warmly in my lower stomach. I felt like I was riding on a high! Little dots of light swam throughout my vision as I was trying to comprehend why I felt this way. This was intense! I mean I literally was feeling different - like I needed him! Is this what love truly feels like? In my mind, I was comparing my making out with Rex in the theater to my few times with Jason, including at the Homecoming. Those two experiences were very different altogether in how they made me feel.

In the theater, I wasn’t quite sure of myself as to really being a girl or not, and the naughtiness of the entire thing just to see how a boy made me feel without being caught sort of intensified how that evening made me feel. And, well, I sort of purposefully did it to freak Mindy out as well. After all, she deserved to be made to feel that way after how much she pressured me that day and put me into that situation in the first place! But I found that I immensely enjoyed that moment with Rex in the theater!

*sigh* I’m sorry. Mindy’s my best friend and I shouldn’t think this way about her. I love her to pieces, even though, between the both of us, she is more of a prankster than I am. She loves to dare things and skirt trouble. And me, well, I stick with my friend.

Rex was good, but Jason… he was definitely a lot better! I’m going to have to talk about this with some of my friends and find out just what this is I’m feeling about Jason. It’s driving me crazy in a way!

It was then, that I noticed Jason was waving to me as he drove off.

Where did the time fly to?

Still feeling light-headed and thinking about Jason, I put my key into the doorknob of our front door and then opened it. After shutting the door, and without taking my sweater off, or handbag, I made my way over to the sofa and just sank into its blissful comfortableness and let my mind drift.
 

*          *          *
 
Sometime throughout my dreaming, I had heard the front door open, and oblivious to the noise, my mind drifted back to Jason holding me in his arms, sweetly surrendering myself to him again.

“Lynn?”

I blinked my eyes open, startled, and saw my mother sitting on the sofa beside me. She had already taken her jacket off and set her purse and handbag down.

“Are you feeling alright sweety?”

Ummmm. I don’t know? Really, I feel weird. But I can’t talk to Mom about this yet either. It would only cause her more grief. And I think I caused enough of that for her for a long time to come.

“I’m sorry Mother. I just have been a bit moody all day and been doing a lot of thinking about everything. That… and well… I’m tired.”

My Mom’s expression changed to a more quizzical look.

“Thinking of not being a girl anymore?”

Oh Please!

“Mother! You are stuck forever with me as your daughter.” I looked at her seriously. I was slightly offended she would even say such a thing after all that we had been through.

My mother rolled her eyes. “Darn, there goes my chance of getting my son back. Come to think of it, I seem to have forgotten what he looks like…”

I knew right away she had been teasing me! I play hit her arm and just rolled into leaning against her and then falling into her lap. I had my head in her lap and my Mother had one arm cradling my head and the other, she was pulling my hair from my face.

I looked up into her eyes after she had pulled my hair away.

I giggled.

“You are my precious baby, Lynn. Don’t you ever forget that,” she emphasized as she squeezed my hand.

“I know Mommy. I never thought my life would change like this.”

She grinned. “Life is all about change. Things we like one day, we find other things we like more the next. Growing up, learning, and exploring things. But you sweetheart, you are going through something I can’t even imagine. I’m dealing with this the best that I can. And sometimes, it’s a little rough. One day you were my son, to me, and the next, the most beautiful daughter a mother could ever want. You have no idea what has been going through my mind ever since I saw you laying here on this couch that night.”

I was curious and wanted to know. “Please Mom. Tell me?”

I snuggled to rest my head into a better position in her lap, staring up at her, waiting.

“Well, when I first saw you, I thought you were the most wonderful girlfriend you could have ever found for yourself as a boy. Sweet, classy, very proper. It’s such a shame I can’t ever seem to get the two of you to meet.”

We both snickered at the same time, giggling at that image.

“But seriously,” she continued, “I have done some thinking, and after having listened to you, and others, I found that perhaps I had failed you as a Mother.”

What?

“How did you fail me Mom?”

“I spent so much time at work trying to support us both, that I had totally overlooked your needs and wants. I feel really awful inside.”

My Mother's eyes moistened.

“I missed my daughter growing up right in front of my eyes!”

Oh…

My Mother hugged me and I just had to hug her back.

“Mommy, you are not at fault! I had to hide because I didn’t know better! I didn’t know that what I was inside was a girl. I didn’t even know what to call it. I just knew I was different and that something was wrong with me. I wasn’t really open to talking with others about it until you caught me.”

My Mother pulled away and looked me right in the eyes.

“You know you could have talked to me about it, and we could have worked it out. You didn’t need to hide it from me.”

I had to think carefully here. This was a touchy subject!

“Mom. I wasn’t able to talk to you about it back then. You know how Dad… well the man that was supposed to be my father, was towards me. I never liked how he tried to force me to do everything he wanted and wouldn’t let me do things that I liked. I tried hard to please him, and you. But I felt trapped, caged, and withdrawn because he always made me feel like such a failure. And you… were too busy arguing with him. He made our life so difficult…”

I paused.

“Mother, I was too busy worried about why I felt different and was trying to find ways to cope. You had enough problems of your own with just… him! I didn’t want to bother you with my problems either, even after he left.”

My mother pulled me in close to her in a loving hug.

“That was my fault baby. Mine. I should have paid more attention to you. I was working as hard as I had to save for your college fund and provide us with what we have.”

She sniffled and then bravely said, “We can both agree he wasn’t much of a father. But despite all of his shortcomings and how he was, he did give me the best gift in my entire life — You!”

I hugged her again.

“I’m so glad that he blessed me with you. And I’m glad, in this most weird and wonderful way, to actually be given a second chance to raise you. And I’m not going to miss out on it this time! I want you to understand I’m here to guide you through life and help you to make the right decisions. I want us to be open with each other and for you to feel free to discuss things with me.”

I grinned as I stared up into her face, “I think you are doing a great job so far Mother.”

“I hope so!” she tickled me. “I’d hate to think I’m raising my daughter the wrong way.”

I had to wait for my giggling to stop. I know I had been getting much closer to her in our Mother-Daughter relationship during the past week, but I think, just now, this broke through the ice! We have never spent a moment together like this before! She certainly is more open with me now as her daughter than when I had been her son. Whatever the reason, I like her more this way now than before I openly admitted I was a girl to her. I respect her even more now.

I lay there savoring the moment. I felt like we were now the best of friends, just like I am with Mindy. Talk about heavy! This just felt so good to be this way and open with her. I still have to wait and do some talking around with my other friends before I land the bombshell on her about boys in general, my liking and want to explore them, Aaaaaaannnnd Jason, to be specific!

And now was not that time.

Why was life so complicated?
 

*          *          *
 
Sometime, while I had lain there, my Mother had turned the television on with the volume on low. I must have dozed off again!

“How long was I asleep Mom?” I stretched my arms as I looked up at her.

“Only an hour and a half. You looked so comfortable laying there, I let you sleep where you were. As the mother of a teenage daughter, I know I won’t get many moments like that. So I have to enjoy them as they come.”

I smiled at her as I leaned over and sat back up, freeing her lap from the weight of my body.

My Mom suggested, “If you feel up to it, why don’t you change out of your school clothes and help me make us dinner: angel hair noodles in alfredo sauce and a small salad sound good?”

“Mmmm! Yepperoies!”

I stretched again and stood up. My Mother gave me a peck on my cheek as she went on into her room to change clothes. Yeah, I need to change mine too!
 

*          *          *
 
I went to my room, and changed out of my blouse and skirt, and put on my short cut off jeans and a blue t-shirt. Hmmph! Even now, there was still no trace of my looking like a boy

Curious, I pulled my hair back and held it back and down.

Even with the sort of thin-hair/bald look, my face and head was most definitely like a girl’s. It just amazes me how I had managed to get through life with a minimal of teasing and yet having people not mention to me that I looked like a girl until I actually put girl clothes on. I mean, come on! I can see that I looked like a girl, even back as far as maybe two to four years, I think? My head is small. My body is very delicate — too thin and delicate for being a boy compared to all the other boys I see in school!

Was my grunge look the only thing that kept anyone from saying anything?

And Mindy. She knew before I did that I was a girl too. I have to imagine in some mysterious way that she was fated to uncover who I really was. And even though I am not fully a girl, well, down there, people for the most part accept me as one at face value.

My life was really strange.

I shook my hair and combed it down some as I stared at my image in my dresser mirror.

Being a boy really sucked! The way that I felt now and was allowed to be is what I had been wanting to do all of my life. Repressing it… hurt. I’d rather be the one in a boy’s arms, being held, and cared for any day of the week! Being a girl is just sooo right!

If I was a boy, in a boy’s arm’s….

EEeewww!

I shook my head and set my comb down.

I’m just not going to go there with that thought!

I’m just glad that I’m a girl!
 

*          *          *
 
I entered the kitchen to see Mom boiling the water for the noodles and had the vegetables sitting out on the table along with the cutting board, knife, and a small… present?

“What can I do to help?”

“Oooh,” she started, “I think you can start by opening that little gift I laid out on the table for you.”

Excitedly, I sat down in my chair and picked up the little white box with a rose red ribbon and bow tying it closed. I gently shook it. Well, it is heavier than jewelry! Hmmmm.

In the past, I would normally have ripped the outer wrapping off and tore open the box. But this time was different. The way I felt inside was to preserve the ribbon and bow. I couldn’t explain why I felt that way, just that I did.

I felt my Mother lean next to me as I gently pulled the bow off and then tenderly undid the tape holding the ribbon pieces together securing the box.

Then I clasped my hands together and stared at the box.

What the heck was this? And more importantly, what did I do to deserve whatever it was?

“Go ahead honey. Open it.” Mom urged me.

Slowly I lifted the lid off of the box.

Inside, nestled on top of the polyester type filled batting lining the bottom of the box was a bright pink cell phone.

A cell phone!

I immediately turned and hugged my Mother again! It was becoming quite a habit.

“I promised this to you days ago sweety. It’s more than time you should have had it.”

I opened it up and pulled out the little manual to look it over. It was an AT&Tâ„¢ model! My very own cell phone!

“I want you to be able to call me at any time where ever you may be. It’s for your safety - now, as a girl, more than ever. I’ll come get you no matter what. Okay?”

“Thank you Mom. I…I r-really… don’t think I deserve it.”

She gently patted my shoulder. “I want my daughter to know that I trust her and will be there for her. Remember what I said about the calls. Keep them down to emergencies for now, and later, I will increase the minutes. There is included with this plan 20 free text sends per month. So keep that to a minimum too as there is a charge for each text send beyond that.”

Wow! I was like, stunned! It’s almost a status symbol or something like that to have one. But I knew the catch here. Mom wanted to try and trust me now, for the first time as her daughter. I know the answer to that — yes! I will keep her trust.

I heard it and stood up quickly to turn the stove burner temperature down. The water was over boiling! I then poured the box of angel hair noodles in and stirred them a little.

“I take it you have things well in hand?”

I grinned. “Yes Mom. I’ll finish this. I’ll look at the cell phone after we eat.”

She sat down and replied, “Great. I’ll do the salad this time.”
 

*          *          *
 
We sat down and enjoyed our meal, with casual talking. I loved the Balsamic Vinaigrette dressing on my salad. My Mother had just picked it up this past weekend shopping and this was my first time tasting it with just a sprinkle of Parmesan cheese. Yummy!

My mother explained to me as we ate, that soon, we would see a doctor to physically examine me, in conjunction with my psychological therapy evaluation, to see what the recommended course of action we should take with me. I didn’t know I had to do all this sort of stuff to be a girl. I just knew I was one, that’s all.

As we were cleaning up and rinsing off the dishes, my Mother mentioned, “I want you to take the copy of your therapy sessions billing statement to Miss Benson tomorrow and tell her to arrange to make payments for them. If there is a problem, give her my cell phone number or work number to call me.”

I didn’t see any problem with that. Knowing Miss Benson now, I think she would she would bend over backwards for me, even though I felt really guilty about that. But I couldn’t convince Mom about it. *sigh*
 

*          *          *
 
I picked up the phone handset and, once I was inside my room, I called Mindy.

“Hello?” Oops! That was Mr. Swanson!

“May I speak with Mindy please Mr. Swanson? It’s me, Lynn.”

“Certainly. Hang on just a second.”

After a few moments, Mindy spoke into the phone, “Hey girl!”

“Ummm, does your father know… about me yet?”

“Nope! But we are planning to discuss it soon. My mother said she will talk with your mother and have the both of you over when she does talk to him. I don’t think he will have a problem with it, and neither does my mom. But, she felt that with you and your mom right here, he would probably be more sympathetic to your situation.”

“I guess that sounds okay. I just don’t want any more problems. I have enough of them to deal with now.”

Mindy paused. “Like which ones?”

“Like my therapy sessions with Dr. Kingston and the fact I also have to go get a physical exam soon. Something about checking my blood and hormone levels and such.”

“Oh wow! You mean they are going to start letting you grow into a girl now?”

“I don’t know, that’s what we will find out. I didn’t know that I had to go see a doctor to do that.”

“Well Duh!” Mindy chastised. “Your body is so girlish anyways you probably don’t need the hormones.”

“Well, my Mother seems to think differently and says my body could start into a male puberty and damage my looks. If I want to stay a girl, I need to be examined and see what I need to do and how much of what to prevent going into a boy’s puberty.”

“What if the doctor says you really are a girl and can have babies?”

“MINDY! Sometimes you are so impossible! That can’t happen. I’m a boy physically! And boys can’t have babies.”

“Maybe,” she giggled.

That girl! Sometimes… I just sighed.

“The other reason I called too was to tell you I now have my own cell phone.”

Mindy squealed. “Wow girl! Hey! When you and your mom come over, bring it over too. Maybe I can convince my mom to get me one?”

“Okay. Just I can’t make calls to friends right now on mine for the moment unless it’s an emergency. But, I read here on the plan sheet that you can call my number as long as you are on the same phone and plan for free. Technically, if you had the same AT&T â„¢ phone and plan I could call you. But not until my mom says it’s okay. She will upgrade the plan for more minutes later so that I can call others that are not on the plan. But for now, I want to earn her trust.”

“That’s cool! What is your number?”

I read off my mom’s handwriting on the manual. “555-7707.”

“Got it. Also, after the both of you talk to my father, and if it’s okay, I wanted to set up a sleepover one weekend with you and few other girls, before Halloween, here at our house.”

Cool! I have never been invited to stay overnight at a friend’s house ever! Mindy is the greatest! I wonder which of her friends I’ll get to meet?

“Ooops! Oh hey Lynn, my mother is asking me if she can talk to your mother now.”

“Sure Min. Hold on.”

“Mom?” I yelled down the hallway.

“Yes sweety?”

“Mrs. Swanson wants to talk with you on the phone.”

“Okay Lynn, give me a minute.”

I walked out to the living room and waited until she had finished removing the home layouts and design sheets for the homes that she sold and bought for her work from off of her lap and onto the coffee table. I handed her the phone.

They conversed for a little while with my Mom a seemingly concerned at first and listening. She seemed to relax a bit later and finished up with, “…That’ll be fine. See you then!”

She handed the phone back to me.

“Min?”

“I’m here.”

“Okay, I’ll see you in school tomorrow.”

“Good night girl friend.”

“Night Mindy.”
 

*          *          *
 
Mom sent me off the next morning with the copy of my therapist’s bill. Mindy and I boarded the bus as normal. However, today I wore hip hugging jeans with a cute little flower design on the upper side of my right thigh, a white camisole, and my red sweater. I could still feel the boys eying me as I walked down the aisle to my seat. In a way, I really liked the attention that they were giving me. I felt pleased that they liked how I looked enough to keep staring at me with want in their eyes. It’s hard getting used to that from being a non-noticed entity from before - unnerving too! It was like a power and it kinda made me feel good about myself. But it also kept hammering home my wanting to try and have boys for friends now, even though I knew that I would be playing with fire.

I smiled as I sat down and scooted in so Mindy could sit beside me.
 

*          *          *
 
We made it to school and Mindy followed me to the office.

“Hi Lynn! Hi Mindy!”

Mrs. Kramer never failed to greet me with a smile.

“Hi Mrs. Kramer. I’m here to see Miss Benson please.”

“Okay, just a moment.”

She went back to Miss Benson’s door and stuck her head in. After a nod, she motioned for us to come back there. Mindy and I walked through the swinging counter door and into Miss Benson’s office. Mindy took the far chair and I sat in the nearer one. Miss Benson seemed rather cheerful today.

“Lynn, Mindy. What can I do for you today?”

I handed Miss Benson the receipt. “Miss Benson, my Mother asked me to hand this to you and to see if what “you and her” discussed would be arranged. She wrote her phone numbers on there as well in case there was a problem.”

Miss Benson hummed to herself as she quickly looked over the bill. She then set it back down and smiled.

“Of course Lynn, consider it done. Oh, while you are here, I’ll give you these forms for your mother to look over. They are for your physician to sign to state your change in gender status. You have until November to get these back to me signed by your doctor and mother. If they are not back by then, the school board is going to inquire about my blocking the return of your records to Central Records Administration without sufficient cause. “

“Right now, all of your paper records, from elementary school to now, are here in my safe, under administrative review for special cause. But that is only temporary. I need those forms back to make “adjustments without question.” Because you are under the age of 18, this can be done here and I have someone on the school board who can reduce the chances of this getting beyond just us, but he needs those forms in order to make it happen. One of them needs to be signed by a judge in the County Juvenile Court. I have attached a note recommending Judge Jennifer Stanton.”

“Our school computer already has all your schedule and private information changed to female and all of your teachers have had their roll forms and schedules updated with the “corrected” information.”

“Those forms are very important Miss Collins. Have your mother see to it please.”

“Yes Ma’m.”

I took the manila folder and put it into my school notebook binder. Mindy and I started talking as we walked down the hallway to our lockers.
 

*          *          *
 
I was in the cafeteria at lunchtime and was quietly hoping that Jason would want to have lunch with me. He didn’t come over though. I, of course, was watching him the entire time, between bites, over there with his other friends - apparently busy. Mindy didn’t fail to notice my staring at Jason.

“Lynn,” Mindy whispered into my ear, “If you stare any harder you will bore a hole right through his head.”

Fudge! Now she knows!

“I wouldn’t know that Min. He’s well off to do,” I softly replied.

“Girl, you know you have a crush on him.”

I swiftly turned to face her and stared daggers into her eyes!

“Lynn,” Mindy pleaded, see how I was reacting, “There is no need to be so defensive. All of us go through that.”

Lisa, hearing us talk, scooted closer to me on my other side and in a low voice added, “It’s okay Lynn, when it comes to boys, you have to take them as they are. You can’t change them to fit you. You just have to be lucky to find the one that suits who you are the best. All of them have their faults.”

I slowly turned to see who the heck this otherworldy person of wisdom was and where she had just come from!

Her smile was infectious.

“How do you know so much about them?” I asked in awe.

“I have been through five boyfriends and have gone from the nice ones to the complete jerks. I have been dumped, dined, and had them beg me to be with them. All of them have their faults and so far, I haven’t found one nice enough yet to suit me. Boys prefer their toys nowadays to a girl.”

“Toys?” I asked, oblivious to reference.

“Cars, game machines, things to distract themselves with,” Mindy explained.

“Oh!” I blushed, realizing I had shown myself to be completely dumb in that remark.

Karen leaned over, “That’s why we girls stick together and have fun while we cruise days away waiting to spot our catch!”

“You really are kind of new to dating boys?” Lisa blurted.

Omigosh! No! I have to divert attention away before they find out!

“Yeah she is, “Mindy interrupted. “She has been a bookworm and really geeky forever. I should know. I have known her for practically my entire life. She is just now awakening to womanhood.”

“I guess that sort of makes sense. After all, you did used to really try hard to look like a boy. I thought maybe, you sort of, well, liked girls?”

You know, girl conversations can be just a little TMI at times? Why me?

My face turned a bright beet red as I covered it and started to lay my head down on my arms in total embarrassment.

“Lynn, I’m sorry!” Lisa begged.

Lisa and Mindy pried my arms away and got me to lean back to sit up again. My eyes were watery and I kept them closed.

“Lynn? Lynn?” Mindy pulled me to her and I let her hold me.

“Lisa! You need to be more careful about that! Lynn is not and has not been into girls. She has never even thought about being with anyone outside of wanting a friend. I have been about her only friend up until now. You just like totally embarrassed her in front of all of us! She is a very shy person.” Mindy admonished.

“Lynn, please accept my apology? Please? I’m really sorry.”

I turned to face her and sat up, still sniffling. “Lisa, you want to know why I dressed as I did? I had an abusive father when I was little. Much of what he did to me scarred me mentally. I dressed like a boy because he wanted me to be more like his son. Even after he left my Mom and me, I still couldn’t break out of that mindset. I continued to dress like that so people could like leave me alone. I joked around a lot, you know? I tried to give a reason for my even being here in school. I studied and poured myself into books so I could ignore other people. I got good grades for being so attentive to the textbooks. I ignored everyone else!”

“And you know what? I hated it!”

“I hated every minute of being alone, despite being around,” I motioned with my arms, “everyone here.”

“The only reason I made it through all of that was because of Mindy.”

All of them went quiet with wide eyes. Mindy eyed me with an expression of shock on her face. A few moments later, I just realized what I had said. Omigod! I jerked up from my seat on the bench, banging my lunch tray, and covered my mouth as I ran from the cafeteria. I couldn’t see the looks of others as they wondered why I ran.
 

*          *          *
 
I ran down the west hallway towards my home economics room and into the girl’s restrooms there. I went to the far stall, and upon finding it open and empty, I dashed in and slammed the door shut, locking it. I sat down on the toilet seat and broke down crying.

I had just told them all about me. Now they would know I’m a boy! Some people say that actions and words that scar people mentally, do so for a lifetime. Yeah. I’m proof of that. I wonder just how much of my wanting to be a girl was the result of my father trying to force me to be the boy he wanted me to be, or was it always there in the background? I don’t know. Right now, I don’t even care. My life is ruined!

I heard the gentle rapping on the door.

“Lynn. It’s me Mindy. Open up.”

I tried to ignore her, hoping she would go away. There was more rapping on the door and her pouting. Geez, can’t I be alone anywhere?

“Lynn if you don’t let me in, I’ll crawl under…”

I unlocked the door. Mindy slowly opened the door and saw what a mess I was. She picked me up off of the seat and pulled me to her. Her hugs always made me feel safe. I just tried to let go and let my mind calm down while she held me.

“Lynn, I am so sorry too! I never knew! You didn’t have to tell them that either. Something must really be bothering you!”

I sniffled, “Yeah, a lot of things are. I just ruined my life now by telling them what I am.”

“You silly girl, no you did not! They think you were a tomboy — a girl who acts and wanted to be more like a boy. They think you were always a girl. Heck, to me, you have always been one.”

I guess so. I mean I really haven’t been feeling well lately. I’m frustrated trying to keep my word to Mom, my inner self wanting to be with boys, and my being scared of letting go entirely, to be myself. Because if I do, I will reveal to them I’m not entirely a girl. It’s a lot for a kid like me to handle and I have only, really, Mindy to turn to.

She squeezed me again in her hug.

“Everything is okay. Can you make it through the rest of the day? How about you come over to my house after school with me on the bus? Then you and me will have a private chat in my room. I want to hear about your problems.”

“I can’t.” I weakly replied.

“Lynn, we are best friends. No secrets! Remember?”

I sniffled and wiped my eyes. “It’s not that. I have to go see my therapist after school.”

“OH!” she exclaimed, finally understanding.

I went over to the sink and saw myself in the mirror. The little bit of makeup I had on was gone and my eyes were red. I really looked awful. Yep! No cheeriness anywhere!

I grabbed a paper towel and wetted it from the faucet and gently dabbed it around my face.

“Part of the reason I’m like this is because the Doctor wants to know everything about me.”

I saw Mindy looking at me in the mirror.

“I don’t want to tell him everything! I don’t want some complete stranger knowing my entire life! I didn’t like it that much until just recently… and I certainly don’t want to think about it again and relive it while trying to explain it to him. I hated it! Not the parts with you in it Min, but all the rest! If I don’t cooperate, not only will my Mother be mad, but the Doctor might deny my becoming a…”

At that moment, another girl that neither of us knew stepped in and went into the stall nearest to the doorway. We took that cue to stop our conversation. I set my purse down onto the sink edge and pulled out my makeup. Mindy decided to help me with it. I could see in the mirror my facial covering pretty much hid the redness of my eyes. I guess I would pass. Mindy them combed my hair back down and readjusted the hair snaps holding my hair back on each side of my head.

I seriously don’t know what I would do without her.
 

*          *          *
 
We walked out of the restroom and down towards our lockers. A few students were milling about in the hallway.

“Look. Lisa is very sorry about that comment she made. I think you should go accept her apology.”

I pursed my lips. “It wasn’t that Mindy. I just flew off the handle from all of this pressure. In some ways, sneaking around and hiding gave me more freedom and fun than I feel now. Now, I have things I have to do and I have restrictions on me that make me feel caged in again, just like before.” I looked around quickly to make sure no one else was near where they could hear me, “As a boy, I could do more. Now I can’t. Getting used to this change is hard.”

“Welcome to my side of the fence Lynn.” Mindy smiled and shook my hand.

“Very funny Mindy. I’d still rather be this than what I was before. I guess, now, I just want to be grown up so that I can be more free again.”

“We all do. Look, let’s talk about this later at my house, when you get back from your appointment, okay?”

“Okay.” I answered. Then I thought for a moment. “I’ll apologize to her now. I don’t want her to think it’s her fault. Besides, so what if I did like girls?”

Mindy gave me a weird look.

“I was only saying. If I did, I did. So what? But I don’t like them that way. I want to be with a boy, one who is responsible and wants me for me and will treat me decently and listen to me.”

Mindy giggled. I frowned.

“We all want that Lynn! It takes time. It doesn’t happen overnight and it takes a lot of looking around and a lot of work!”

“I suppose so. That and I really want to keep the friends I have. I never again want to be alone like I had been before.”

We continued to walk back towards the cafeteria where we saw Lisa and Karen coming out.
 

*          *          *
 
Later on in the afternoon, today being a Thursday and my therapist appointment, I waited outside the school building on the left side by the parking lot looking for my Mother’s car. I ignored the masses of other kids talking and heading out to their cars or to the buses or even walking out along the sidewalks to their homes. I even saw Mindy board our bus, number 181. I watched her walk past the windows and sit down alone, in our usual seat.

Yeah, I’ll go over to her house after the appointment, if Mom will let me.

The honking of my mother’s car horn caught my attention.
 

*          *          *
 
I sat down in the car, properly of course, and fastened my seat belt. Mom seemed to sense something off with me and questioned me as she started the car moving again, “Okay sweety, what’s wrong?”

I squirmed a little. I couldn’t say it right now. But I know she expected an answer, so…

“Do you think Mr. Swanson is going to like blow up and keep me from seeing Mindy?”

My mom answered, “I think he will be okay with you honey. Janet already assured me he isn’t the kind to get angry about this sort of thing. In fact he knows a man in his office who is gay.”

Gay? I really dislike that word. It brings images of two boys or men together in my mind! Yeeeccch!

“Oh come on now Lynn. After what you are going through, you are going to think of two men wanting to be together as being strange?”

Snap! My mother must have seen my reaction!

“Well…” I started and my mouth kinda paused. I really didn’t know what to say.

We had just stopped at the light before the freeway ramp.

“Honey, I may not personally like the way some people live their lives, but at least I try to respect them as a person and not show disgust or anything. Remember Marilyn Grant? She is just like you! And she is a wonderful person. To some other people, you yourself, could be seen by them as a boy still even if you do get to go through the process to become a girl. Though, I swear, I can’t see anything about you that even suggests you are one — except for that part down below you have.”

Yeah!!! The thing that won’t let me be free to be myself with a boy!

I sulked a little. “You are right Mom. I do have to get over that hang up. To me, I see nothing wrong with two girls wanting to be together, or a boy and a girl wanting to be together either. It’s just something I have to learn to get over.”

We were now up and on the interstate heading into the city.

“Lynn, sweety,” my Mom continued, “When you are ready to tell me what is really bothering you, I’ll listen. Okay? I’m here for you.”

Geez! Are my thoughts being read by everyone today? Wow. This is getting spooky!

“Mother… ,” I moaned. “Is it that obvious?”

“Mother’s can read their daughters very well sweety. And yes, it’s that obvious.”

Great!

“Okay, when I’m ready I will explain it to you. I just have a lot of thinking to do.”

“Fair enough. Nothing serious?”

I licked my lips, as they were a little dry. “Maybe. I don’t really know right now. But it’s just something I have to find out.”

“Okay honey. Just when you are ready.”
 

*          *          *
 
My Mom soon dropped me off at the doctor’s office. My moodiness had somewhat gone back into hiding along the way here, so I was a little more like my old self again.

“I’ll pick you up at five-thirty. I have a couple of things to pick-up at the mall. Is there anything you need?” Mom asked.

“Could you possibly get a cute dress for me?” I asked.

“Hrumph, don’t make me regret this Lynn. You’re not supposed to become a girl this fast,” Mom giggled.

“But, Mom, I’ve always been a girl! I just forgot to tell you,” I said as I leaned across the car and kissed my mother’s cheek.

She moved her hand to her cheek and touched it.

“I guess there are some benefits for having a daughter after all,” she said as her eyes misted.

“Bye Mom. I’ll see you in a bit. Drive safe!” I smiled back at her as I exited the car.
 

*          *          *
 
I entered Dr. Kingston’s office and sat next to the magazine rack. I wanted to finish the article I had started the first day I was here. Dr. Kingston’s receptionist smiled at me and waved hi. I returned the gesture. I had just opened the magazine when I was called into his office.

“Good afternoon, Lynn,” he said as he shut the door behind me.

I hope I had my emotions under control!

“Good afternoon, doctor,” I replied.

“So, how did your day go?”

I shrugged. “Okay I guess.”

“Just okay? Did something happen I should know about?” I saw him giving me that all knowing eye. Omigod! I’m not talking about today anymore! What can I say?

“No. I wanted to have lunch with a friend, but he was busy.”

I noticed Dr. Kingston’s eyebrow twitch when I said that.

“Is he a good friend?” he asked.

You betcha! He’s dreamy, If I can get his attention…

“No, just a friend,” I responded.

There was no way I was going to tell the doctor my real feelings toward Jason. Despite what he claimed I could just see this getting back to my Mom. He’d probably call my mother and have me put away!

“Does he know about you, you know, the boy part?”

“No,” I answered sheepishly. I had stopped looking directly at the doctor hoping that my little white lies wouldn’t be noticed.

“I see. I’m not going to pursue this any farther today. We will have to build our trust before that happens. I do want to warn you though that dating boys that don’t know everything about you is extremely dangerous! Several of my patients have been beaten within an inch of their life when their dates found out about them! Think Lynn! Think before you do this again,” the doctor admonished.

“Yes sir,” I eeped out. Wow! I knew things could be bad, but people wanting to try and kill me for being me? Hmmm. The reaction I have towards gay boys and men. I suppose if that were magnified I could be just as bad as the ones that would want to try and hurt me. Sheesh! But I would never hurt someone. But maybe boys that feel that way… would?

I guess I have to look at things from a new perspective?

My mind wandered to this weekend and the date Mindy was setting up for us. Mindy and I have been having so much fun with this whole thing that we really haven’t been thinking about the bad things that could possibly happen. I’m starting to see what my mother sees with regards towards Mindy. I love Mindy to pieces and will obviously do almost anything she asks of me. I mean, look at me now and who I was? Mindy acts before she thinks and as this whole thing unravels, I just wonder what else she’s going to get me into?

“Good, now that we have that settled, I’d like to start from the beginning. When did you realize that you were a girl?”

I knew the very instant that had happened. It was when Rex and I first touched lips. It confirmed what my soul felt like all along and spelled out what I really was!

G-I-R-L.

After being admonished by the doctor, admitting to making out with Rex was the farthest thing from my mind!

“When Mindy and I went to the mall.”

“And why did it happen there?”

“Well it’s because we went there to try my mingling in with other people as my first time dressed as a girl out in public and we were having so much fun. It was just two girls hanging out.”

“How long have you been dressing before that?”

“Just a few times.”

“And you were certain that you were a girl?”

“Yes, more than anything.”

“I can understand that looking like a girl and being accepted as one could be exciting, but that doesn’t make you a girl. What happened before the trip to the mall?”

“I changed my clothes at Mindy’s.”

“Maybe I should rephrase that question. When was the first time you tried to become a girl? Your mother mentioned something about a prank.”

“Oh that! It was just a thing with my hair. One of my teachers thought I was a girl because my hair went wild before his class and Mindy thought it was funny. We decided to fool him for several days, but that was all.”

“Did you feel like a girl when you did that?”

“Umm, well yes and no. I thought of it more as a prank than anything else.”

“What happened next?”

“Mindy thought it would be funny to enter me in the Homecoming Pageant. We didn’t think I would win and we’d have a good laugh afterward. I didn’t count on winning the Princess title for our class.”

“Is that the first time you thought you might be a girl?”

“Well my whole life I felt odd and different. Without going too in depth, I honestly did not like doing things that boys did when I was younger and even up until Homecoming. I felt totally out of place trying to be one and realizing I did not fit in, but never why. I did not know what it was and did not have a name for it. But as far as Homecoming, I think maybe it was. I couldn’t admit to Mindy how much I liked looking like a girl. I was supposed to be a boy after all.”

“Okay. Tell me how you felt that first time.”

“When Mindy made me up, it was exciting. It was a feeling of freedom that filled up inside me and I felt right for the first time in my entire life. I was both embarrassed and happy about it at the same time. I became totally alive for the first time in my life. Does that make any sense to you Doctor?”

“It does.”

“Well, we took pictures and laughed like two girlfriends. It was when I had to go home that something else happened. I felt sad that I had to become a boy again. Even without makeup on, I realized that I saw a girl looking back at me from the mirror. It’s hard to explain. It didn’t feel wrong to try to be a girl, but I realized at that moment that it felt wrong to try and pretend anymore to be a boy, whereas being a girl just felt so right.”

“What happened after that?”

“I won the contest and because of the obligations I had to learn how to be a girl.”

“Was your mother aware of this?”

“No.”

“Okay, continue on with what happened next.”

“I went to Mindy’s and she did my makeup again, but this time I dressed completely as a girl for the first time.”

“How did that make you feel?”

“Absolutely wonderful! Mindy and I spent the afternoon together and I was supposed to learn what to do as a girl, you know, like walking and sitting. Everything a girl learns her entire life, except I had to learn it in two weeks.”

“Learning to be a girl and being one are two different things Lynn. Tell me how you felt when you had to become a boy again.”

“It was awful. I got depressed. I felt like I was being wrapped in clear plastic and I couldn’t move. I felt so wrong.”

“I don’t quite understand.”

“Ok, I’ll try and say it this way then. As the afternoon continued with Mindy, I found I was talking like a girl. You know, with my hands and everything, like now. Mindy even gave me some strange looks, but didn’t say anything.”

“I see. Did Mindy teach you that?”

“No. It seemed to come naturally. In fact, she commented I really had nothing to learn in how I walked or acted, because she realized I was already doing it without her telling me. I didn’t even force these movements. It’s like who I was took over automatically.”

“When was the next time you dressed as a girl?”

“The next day. That was when we went back to the mall.”

“That was when you knew you were a girl?”

“Yes.”

“Was there any specific moment when you made that decision?”

“No. I think I already knew I was one before we got there. I now had a name for what I felt I had been repressing my whole life. I felt so natural being dressed and being allowed to be myself as a girl. I felt free. As we spent time at the mall, my thinking actually changed. I wasn’t worried that someone might see me as a boy at all. I was more concerned that they might think I was ugly.”

“You were more worried about your looks than being discovered as a boy?”

“Yes, because from the day before I didn’t think of myself as being a boy any longer. I was a girl, but I realized I was not in the body of one.”

“I have to admit you already look mostly like a girl, but beside that point, that can be dangerous, Lynn! Did you interact with any boys when you were at the mall?”

I felt my face flush when he asked that question. OMIGOD! How was I going to answer that one? Of course, I made out like crazy with a boy named Rex? I had to think of something he might like and making out wasn’t one of them.

“Mindy flirted a lot, and maybe I did too, but nothing happened,” I replied, somewhat truthfully.

He scribbled something down on his notepad.

“How did you feel about that?”

“Umm, it was really kind of fun.”

“Did the boys react to you?”

“Yes, but like I said, nothing happened.”

“It could have, you know? There are boys that troll the mall looking for young girls like you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re inexperienced. A fourteen year old girl wants to impress a boy and they don’t have enough real world experience to know when to say no.”

Gulp! He almost had me down pat! Maybe I should start taking some of their advice. I don’t really know a whole lot about what I’m getting into.

Dr. Kingston looked at the clock on his desk before he spoke again.

“Our time’s up for today Lynn. But… before you go though, I want to give you some advice as a father and not as your doctor. You’re much too young to be flirting with boys that way. If I found out my daughter was doing that at your age, I’d ground her for a month. I know that young girls like you are under enormous pressure by peers and by boys to do things you shouldn’t, things that are adult. Being the way you are places you in very grave danger and you may or not realize that entirely right now. You need to be strong enough to resist and to know when to say no. But as your doctor, this conversation stays between you and me. As much as I would like your mother to know about it, I won’t say anything. This is what I mean about trust Lynn, it’s our secret. I’ll see you next Tuesday.”

“Yes Sir.”

As I got to his door, I turned, and blushed slightly.

“Doctor Kingston?”

“Yes Lynn?”

“Thank you for caring enough to tell me that. I needed to hear that.”

He took off his glasses. “It was my pleasure Lynn. I wouldn’t have felt right in not telling you the dangers that you are really facing.”

I opened the door. “See you next week!”

---

 
To Be Continued...

---

 
Pictures purchased and licensed royalty-free from www.istockphoto.com .
 
 
Mom was waiting when I exited the doctor’s office.

“How did it go sweetheart?” she asked me as she set down the magazine she was reading and gathered her purse.

“Okay I guess.”

“Just okay?”

“Well, we talked about a few things, but mostly he wanted to know how this all started.”

“Do you still like this doctor?”

“Yes, he’s very nice, and I think… I'm starting to trust him.”
 

*          *          *
 
On our way down to the car, I remembered about the papers Miss Benson had handed me. I unzipped my notebook and pulled out the manila folder.

“Mother, Miss Benson asked me to give this to you. She also said there was no problem with the therapy bill either. She said ‘Consider it done.’ ”

“That’s good. I’ll wait a little while to see if… Hmmm” My Mother paused in walking and was intently looking over the papers.

I stopped and waited patiently for her to finish looking them over. I could clearly see that she was not really happy seeing those forms. In a sense, I suppose it was like a finality of killing off completely who I had been as Lynn, the boy. Because, when all of this was done, I would forever be Lynn, the girl.

Mom took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. I knew she was holding back tears. She looked over at me and forced a smile. “Okay sweety, we will take care of these next week.”

I smiled too.

I wanted to completely become a girl! And this was going to be part of that journey.

From what I knew so far, there were a lot of doctors I was going to have to see. And it wasn’t just as simple as putting on the clothes: there were medical procedures and drugs I would have to take and regular doctor visits. I never imagined this would be so complicated! How could we ever afford all these medical visits and things?

We rode in silence for a little ways before Mom asked me, “A penny for your thoughts?”

I knew what she wanted to know. I guess being a girl gives you some super special radar power to know something about what is going on, but Geez! I haven’t seemed to have acquired that yet in respect towards reading others, well, except Mom that is.

I guess it’s time I said something about it.

“Mom, I have been asking about boys.”

I saw my Mother flinch at that statement, and she ever so briefly closed her eyes and opened them again to focus on the road. Wow! I had better be careful what I say! I don’t want us to wreck!

“I see.”

She was silent, obviously waiting for me to continue. I knew that this subject was breaking her heart, so I knew I had to think carefully about what I said.

“Mom, I have been having urges inside me. Well, urges to want to have boys for friends. But I know how you feel about that issue.”

She was still silent.

“Well, I talked to Dr. Kingston about it and he gave me an eye opening of just what kind of danger I really am in. How careful I have to be and the precautions I need to take. Apparently, being friends and dating with boys will not be so simple for me as it could be with normal girls.”

My Mother slowly nodded as she changed lanes back over to the right side of the road.

“That is roughly half of what had been bothering me all day. What I want to tell you, no, what I need to tell you … is that I have a boy as a friend … already.”

My Mother's face formed a frown.

“Mother, wait please! Let me explain.”

“Go on,” her voice wavered.

“We are friends and I only see him a couple of times a day during school. He also … *sniff* … drives me home from school a lot … during the week.” I had a hard time to keep my emotions in check. I don’t know why my eyes decided that it was time to form tears in them. They just did.

“So just who is this boy you are allowing to drive you home?” My Mom stated with a coldness in her voice that hinted she was already upset at me. I really felt the anger in those words. Yikes!

“Mother, he is the Homecoming King of our school, his name is Jason. He is the one who danced with me most of that night and even brought me home when Mindy couldn’t because she was in the Hospital.”

I couldn’t read the expression on her face. This did not seem to be going well for me.

“Mother, so you should know, one, he has been nothing but a gentleman to me the entire time. He has not been all over me, and has not asked to do anything with me, well, you know, ‘adult type things.’ Two, no, he doesn’t know about me yet. I have not broached that subject and I really don’t know how to. So I am keeping what we are as just friends.”

“I needed to tell you this Mom. I had to. It has been eating me up trying to figure out how! I want you to trust me!”

Tears trickled down from my eyes. I just went kind of quiet as I could blurredly see we were going down the off ramp from the interstate. I stretched my arms out in front of me and clasped my hands as I looked down into my lap aimlessly.

When we stopped at the red light at the bottom of the off ramp, she spoke, “Well, I knew you were sort of checking out boys. It’s actually very visible in the change in your behaviour. I was waiting for you to tell me. Have you dated him yet without telling me?”

Snap! I can’t lie to her!

She made a right turn and accelerated.

“Jason stopped at the Burgerz shop not far from school to buy me a drink a couple of days ago. I don’t know if that is what you would consider a date, but that is all that has happened outside of seeing him at school and him driving me home. I swear it Mother, that is all of it.”

I had said all of this in a guilty pleading tone and I was cringing. I was worried Mom was going to lay down the law and forbid me to have boys for friends! I mean she sort of already did so a couple of years ago with me about girls. Mindy had been an exception. She had also made the point with me earlier too about boys.

We passed the road that led down to our school.

“Well, young lady, I was once a teen girl too. Since you are apparently one as well, I can’t expect to hold you to a different set of standards than what I had been through. Like I said, your change, if it ever truly was one at all, is causing me to rethink a lot of how I am treating you. I want to protect you Lynn. I don’t ever want to see you hurt. But If I’m too restrictive, I fear I will push you away from me and cause you to hide things from me. That I don’t want! I want us open and communicating. I want to go through this with you, me and you — together. You are not alone in what you are going through.”

A moment of silence engulfed us as I absorbed what she had said. I felt some shame, because, yes, I had been hiding things from her, both before now and some things yet coming. I did not like doing that either. I want to be close to her.

“How about I have some time to think this over on how I want to go about letting you mingle with boys? I can’t promise it will be entirely what you want, but you also know you are not entirely a girl yet either and Dr. Kingston was absolutely right. That is what I am afraid of. Ever since you opened up and became yourself, I have been worried sick for your safety!”

*sigh* That’s better than a flat out no. And Geez! I had no idea my being myself was causing her problems like that. I haven’t been in trouble yet or had a problem. That doesn’t mean I won’t though. Perhaps I have been extremely lucky so far?

I can’t stand seeing her hurt or worry over me like this either.

“I’m sorry Mommy.”

My Mother reached over and gave my hand a gentle, knowing squeeze.

“It’s okay sweetheart. Every mother worries about her children. It’s a part of growing up. The most unsettling part of life is letting go of your children in little stages: letting them walk and do things on their own, letting them live their own lives, and making their own choices. It’s very difficult for me to let go of you at all at this stage. You need so much help and guidance right now.”

I closed my eyes.

“Yes… I do.”
 

*          *          *
 
“Wake up Miss Sleepyhead.”

My mom squeezed my hand again. I smiled as I opened my eyes. We were home.

I carried my notebook and 2 school texts in with me. Once I settled down and set out my homework across my bed comforter, I called Mindy.

“Hey, Min, what’s up?”

“Nothing much, except I talked to Charlie and the guys are going to meet us Saturday afternoon,” she excitedly said.

I thought back to what Dr. Kingston had said about dating and wondered if I was making a terrible mistake in going along with Mindy? I had to consider Mom’s feelings too.

“Ok. Let me check and see if this is going to be OK with my Mother.” I reluctantly set the phone handset down and walked over to my Mother’s bedroom. Mom was sitting on her bed sorting out clothes she brought in from the dryer to hang and put away.

“Mom?” I quietly asked. “Mindy wants to go the mall this Saturday. Is it okay if I go?”

“What time Saturday?”

“In the afternoon. We were planning to look at some clothes and possibly see a movie together.”

“I guess that would be alright. Call me on your cell if you plan to see the movie. Okay sweety? ”

“Thanks Mom.” I hugged and gave her cheek a quick kiss. I smiled and went back into my bedroom, not quite closing the door all the way.

“Mom says I can go,” I giggled nervously. So much for Dr. Kingston’s warnings!

“Good. Be sure to wear something Rex will like,” Mindy said.

“Mindy,” I quietly whined, “Mom won’t let me out of the house if I wear what I want.”

“Then change over here! We have to look hot for the guys. I know Charlie is absolutely going to love the outfit I have picked out!” Mindy replied.

My stomach felt queasy. “Min … are you sure we’re doing the right thing?”

“Of course we are. How else are we going to see the guys?” She paused for a moment. “I’ll see you tomorrow Lynn, Okay?”

“All right Min, have a good night.”

I hung up the phone and started wondering whether Mindy was leading me down the wrong path or not. Dr. Kingston had said ‘no boys for right now,’ and here I was lining up a date with Rex. If I did start dating already, will that influence my thinking in regards to my wanting to be a girl? Of that, I’m almost certain. Am I really being fair to myself? I don’t know. There is also the risk of exposing myself and what it would do to my life. That is a nightmare I can’t comprehend just right now. It scares me. It’s almost too much for kid like me to think about. There was just … so much … and I knew that I was walking a tightrope.

This whole thing has been an exciting adventure, but now I have to make some very important life changing decisions to make. I now have two boys that want to be with me and I shouldn’t be seeing either of them.

I shook my head to try and clear my thoughts.

What should I do about Jason?

*sigh*

“How stupid!” I thought to myself, “Boys are a part of being a girl, and why shouldn’t I be like any other girl my age? As long as Dr. Kingston doesn’t find out, or Mom … what difference should my social life make to anyone else? If I play it smart and safe I should be able to be me and be as much a girl as possible.”

I went to the bathroom and gently washed and scrubbed my face. Afterwards I brushed my teeth. I then slipped into bed after giving mom a hug good night and turned over on my side. What was I going to do with those two boys? Of the two, I felt Jason’s arms slowly encompass me in his warmth as I let sleep slowly start to claim me. A smile pursed my lips.
 

*          *          *
 
Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

I quickly shut off that annoying alarm! Mornings come too quickly for me.

I crawled out of bed and took my shower. During my washing, I had a few sharp pains from my stomach that jabbed me. I grimaced and pushed both hands up against that spot and waited for it to stop.

Whew! It seemed to stop. I continued on my showering, but the pains did not return. Thank God!

I finished dressing, having selected a nice short sleeve blouse and a pullover soft denim dress to wear over top of that. It was a nice contrast of the silky white arms sticking through the sides of the pullover against the dark blue denim material of the dress. I was pulling my hair back and slipped my pink plastic head band in to hold my in the style I fixed it up into when my Mother appeared at the doorway.

“Ready for breakfast sweetheart?”

I smiled at her. I was in a better mood since the alarm clock blared at me.

“Mmmm hmm.” I hummed softly.

My Mom’s eyes glistened as she studied me.

“How do I look Mom?” I did a little twirl for her.

“You are just so unbelievably beautiful.” I actually saw her sort of choke up some as her expression was sort of one who was in awe of me. Rather than let that affect me, I rushed up to her, giving her a quick peck on the cheek and ran down the hall giggling to the kitchen.

“But you are my child!” Mom whispered to herself as she grinned and followed behind me.
 

*          *          *
 
“Now don’t forget, after school we are going to go over to Mrs. Swanson’s house to talk with her husband about you, so stay dressed as nicely as you are now. I’ll be taking off a little early today so we can meet with him.”

I was crunching down on a spoonful of corn pops as I listened to her. I looked up to her and nodded.

Mom then gave me a more serious look and asked, “Are you going to ride home with Jason today?”

Fudge! That was a loaded question! On one hand, Mom had not told me what her new rules would be. But, if I just outright said ‘yes’, it would not only be rude to her but her feelings. I never thought of this stuff before finding out I was a girl! But it seemed some part of me was now on auto pilot mode analyzing everything in different terms, along with my emotions being more tangible to things.

“Well, I was going to ask you after I ate if you would allow me to. I would like to ride home with him Mom, if it’s alright with you. If you haven’t decided on it yet, I will ride the bus home.”

I hope that was the right way to have said that…

Mom seemed a little perplexed at my answer and closed her eyes for a moment.

“Go ahead and ride home with him dear. I do want to meet him though and get his phone number. Invite him in and ask if he can wait for me to get here. I should be here roughly the same time you normally get home from school.”

Woah! That is presuming something else! I mean… Jason is a friend, but I haven’t allowed him get close to me yet. I mean… I haven’t let anyone really. I am not ready for that kind of thing yet. I know my brain is telling me to, but I know better.

“Mom, wouldn’t that like, be encouraging him to think something else? Like maybe he is my boyfriend?”

“Not at all dear. I simply want to meet your friend, to see for myself who he is, and whether or not I can bring myself to trust him with driving you dear.”

I rolled my eyes. “He is going to think this will be the “next step” up with him getting closer to me. I just want him as a friend for now.”

Mom smiled as she leaned down hugging me from behind.

“Life is so different as a girl huh?” she smirked.

“Yeah. I have a lot more to think about and it takes a lot more time to do things.”

“Is it unfair?” She stood back up.

I quietly answered, “No. Just different.”

“That’s my girl!” She smiled once again as she slung her purse over her shoulder. “See you this afternoon hon. Have a good day at school.”

“Bye Mom!”

I quickly finished my cereal and rinsed the dish and spoon out.
 

*          *          *
 
At lunch, I had just sat down across from Mindy at our table and Laura, when I felt a slight tap at my shoulder.

I turned around.

“Would you mind if I sat beside you to eat lunch with you Lynn?”

It was Mark from my from my former water polo team and in my Biology class.

I softly replied, “I don’t mind.” I gestured for him to take his seat next to me. Mark settled in beside me and started to eat. The girls were talking about other boys and various things. I stole a few glances to my side at Mark while I ate. He didn’t say anything at all. He was just eating. Nope! He didn’t even turn to steal glances at me. Weird!

Mindy and Laura took looks at him too. Laura shrugged her shoulders. I just continued to eat for another 5 minutes before I had to say something.

“Mark?” I quietly asked. “You don’t talk while you eat?”

“Mmmm. I do. Just this was my first time eating with you Lynn and I didn’t want to interrupt you or anything. “

Oh Wow! Mark really is shy!

“Well, talk about something then. I mean you obviously wanted to sit with me, so feel free to talk. I was waiting for you to say something.”

Mark sheepishly admitted, “I was waiting for you to say something too.”

Then we both said at the same time, “Well — “

I couldn’t hold it in, I laughed.

Mark sort of ran his fingers through his hair laughing with me. “I guess we think alike.”

“Yeah.” I mused. “Well you always did wait for me to take the lead in water polo.”

He finished his bite of green beans. “Well, yeah. You are the fastest swimmer we had and well… I functioned better on the team with you taking lead and me catching your passes.”

Laura’s ears perked up as she listened.

I reminisced about the fun I had participating in the sport with him before I got kicked off.

Laura then interjected, “The school water polo team? I thought it was boys only?”

Snap! Ummm…

“She joined us sometimes for fun after practice.” Mark covered for me. The redness of embarrassment still hadn’t left my cheeks. That subject was just a little too touchy.

“Are you going to be ready for the Biology test on Tuesday?” Mark continued, quickly changing the subject.

I did forget about that!

“I’m sure I will be. I have time on Sunday to study for it.”

Mark then offered, “Well Steve, Val, and Karen are going to be joining me over at my house Sunday from 11 am to 3 pm to study for it. You are welcome to come if you would like. Mr. Keatman said this test would be our hardest until finals - the nomenclature and definitions?”

It would be nice to study with new people. Hmmm.

“Tell you what: Let me get your address and phone and I’ll call you tonight after I talk with my Mother. I’d like to come, but to answer your question, I have to ask her first.”

Mark grinned really silly. Oh my gosh! That GRIN! That silly grin of his! I covered my face giggling.

I heard Mark snap a pen out and wrote on a napkin. I pulled my hand away from my vision as I got better control of myself from the giggle fit. He handed me the napkin.

“If you can come, cool! If not, we can try and set up in the library with you Monday afternoon here.”

I answered, “It’s a deal.” I accepted the napkin he had wrote his information on and slipped it into my purse.

I saw Mindy’s eyes widen along with Laura’s. I had to endure their razzing about being Miss Popular and being a boy magnet. I was a flirter and all manner of being just what I am — a girl. I can’t say I was Miss Popular — I did win Homecoming Princess, but yeah, I had to agree with them — a lot of boys were starting to notice me and Mark was the first since Homecoming to actually approach me and talk to me. Everyone had assumed Jason had staked his claim on me. He had not.

Jason had not sat down to lunch with me since that one day, but he was seeing me in the mornings and afternoons. As far as I was concerned, I was open to see others and try the water out.
 

*          *          *
 
Jason drove me home after school. It was a Friday, and that meant freedom to do what I wanted to until Monday! I snuggled as close to him as the consul would allow. His hand found its way to my leg above my knee. His fingers were doing something to my thigh that was driving me crazy. I wanted so much to kiss him, but I knew we would crash the car if I did. You know what they say about men drivers…

We finally reached my house and I had been so infatuated with Jason that I hadn’t noticed that his hand had moved up my leg. Now I knew why it felt so good! He had moved his hand past mid-thigh and my legs had involuntarily reacted by moving apart! I realized that if he went any farther up I might lose control of how I stay tucked up inside. That would mean instant death!

“Please don’t!” I softly begged Jason. I took his hand in mine to remove it from my leg and he intertwined his fingers in between mine and gently squeezed.

“I apologize Lynn. You are so intoxicating that I, well, lost my manners,” he sheepishly confessed.

“My Mother asked me to ask you… if it would alright, for you to wait for a few minutes… for her to get home. She wanted… to meet you.” I breathed out heavily. Jason was sure causing me to feel things that I was barely able to control! He knew just what to do to make me putty in his hands. I had to be very careful.

“She said a few minutes?”

I nodded.

“Sure, as long as neither you nor her mind.”

I smiled. “Honest. It’s okay. Please come in.”

Jason exited the car and walked around to let me out. He then held onto my hand again as we walked up to the house door. I felt him give my hand another squeeze. Those weird giddy feelings I kept having for Jason just jolted through me again when he did that. It felt good, but it made me weak to resist his advances. I quickly pulled my keys from my purse and unlocked the door.

“Have a seat on the couch Jason, I’ll get us something to drink. What would you like?”

I turned to face him as I sat after I had set my purse down on the kitchen counter and saw him studying me. His eyes just kept twinkling in the light and his, well, for lack of a better word — ‘manliness’ captivated something in my heart! I was swooning inside.

“Tea would be okay or else a coke if not?” he finally got around to saying, breaking the mesmerization of both of us having stared at one another.

My body was still tense and excited in a way. I breathed out, “We have iced tea. Sweetened?”

“That would fine Lynn.” Jason grinned and went on into the living room. I was in total control of myself... not!

Fudge it all! What is so wrong with me? I slammed the plastic pitcher of tea on the counter and let the refrigerator door shut a little too hard.

“Is everything alright in there?” Jason called out.

No! Everything is NOT okay. I have feelings for you and its distracting me!

“Yes. I… was a little… clumsy,” I came up with on the fly.

“Take your time, please.”

Why was I feeling so angry all of a sudden? His remark caused me to feel incensed and my initial emotion was to take offense at it: like he was ordering me around. But he wasn’t! I did not understand what I was feeling, but I reasoned I should keep it in for now and talk to Mom about it later.
 

*          *          *
 
I walked in with the drinks and carefully set his on the coffee table near him and took a sip from mine as I sat on the couch with some space between us.

“You and your Mother have a very nice home Lynn,” he commented.

“Thank you. She is into real estate and does take pride in how homes are kept on the inside and out. She sells them.”

I noticed Jason kept looking back at me, causing me to feel a little different. I guess as in being desired. It’s a little disconcerting if you are not used to that sort of look from someone before. I could literally feel his want of me. And my body, it wanted to conspire with him and betray me too.

I took another sip of tea and we both stared at one another again.

Just then, the front door opened. Mom was home! Whew! Too much longer alone with Jason and… well, I would be his.

Susan Collins set her purse down beside Lynn’s and walked on into the living room.

“I’m Susan Collins, Lynn’s Mother. Pleased to meet you.”

Jason leaned forward and shook my mother’s hand. “Jason Carlson Ma’am. My father owns a glass company that does special order windows and standard replacement for residential and commercial customers.”

Mom sat down in the love seat sofa and chatted away, prying out what she wanted to know about him. I was sort of left out of the conversation, so I picked up our now empty glasses and carried them back into the kitchen.

Upon returning, I heard mom say, “Just remember, I haven’t allowed Lynn to date yet. She is my pride and joy. If you can wait for her to be able to date until her fifteenth birthday next year, then I promise you, it will be worth it.”

Jason looked a little disappointed, but stiffened his resolve and came back with, “You are so right Mrs. Collins. She is worth waiting for. I’ll wait. I’d really rather be a friend first. We just barely know each other right now.”

My Mother, seeming satisfied with her ‘interrogation’ added, “It’s Ms. Collins. I have divorced from my ex-husband, but haven’t changed my last name yet. But you can call me Susan.”

Huh? Jason said he would wait? But he has been trying to get through my legs! Hmmm, I hope he means what he says. Maybe all boys are like that inside? I don’t know. I just knew that if he didn’t keep his word, then being even a friend would be impossible. But honestly, my body was reacting to him like programming.

“Well, it was nice meeting you Jason. Unfortunately Lynn and myself have an appointment to get to. Thank you for giving me your information and you can continue to drive Lynn home.”

“Thank you Ms. Collins.”

They both stood up. I put on a smile and walked Jason to our door.

“Thank you for the ride home Jason,” I stared up into those dreamy eyes of his again. Jason put his hand underneath my chin and lifted it a little so that we were eye to eye. He smiled back at me. This felt so… so… good!

“I-I’ll see… you… Monday?” I stammered as I broke through that spellbound gaze of his.

“Sure thing. Be safe!”

He then lifted my upraised hand to his lips and kissed the back of my hand like a Prince.
 
 
I was still reeling from that kiss when I felt Mom tapping me on my shoulder.

“Ready to go sweetheart?”

“Huh?” I just realized Jason had already driven off and his car was gone.

“That must have been some kiss,” Mom quipped as she gave me a pat on my bottom. I snapped out of it and went back inside to check myself in the bathroom mirror.

Finally ready, we headed out the door.

“I sure hope Mr. Swanson won’t wind up hating me.”

“Shush honey. Janet said Fred is a sort of understanding person. Think positive okay?”

I sighed. “Doesn’t help the fact that I feel scared though.”

Mom unlocked the car doors with the clicker. “I’m going to be right there with you baby.”

I sat down in the car seat, and closed the door. As I buckled up, I said, “Thanks Mommy.”
 

*          *          *
 
Mindy’s house was only ten minutes away, but it still felt like an eternity. The not knowing of how Mr. Swanson was going to take me just added to my anxiety from just having been with Jason. My life has been nothing but a rollercoaster ride for the past three weeks . Sometime soon, I just wanted to hop off and take a well deserved break.

We stood at the door and I just shivered. Mom , behind me, asked, “Lynn honey, press the doorbell.”

I was nervous. “Um-mm Mom. Can you do it? Please?”

I gave her those eyes. Mom relented and pushed the doorbell. I then switched position and hid behind Mom just as the front door opened.

Mindy greeted us. “Hi Ms. Collins.”

“Hi Mindy.” Mindy looked around Mom some and saw me there. “Lynn? What are you hiding for? Come on in.”

I smiled rather nervously as I walked in behind Mom.

Mindy’s mother had a casserole dish in her hand as she shut her oven door.

“Hi Susan. Can you and Lynn stay for dinner? I cooked a side of roast beef and we have some onions and corn and salad.”

It sure smelled good to me! Mom asked me, “Up to you Lynn. What do you think?”

I blinked. “Ummmm sure Mrs. Swanson. Sounds great!”

We entered into their living room where Mr. Swanson was watching the news on television. He saw us come in and clicked it off. Mom and me sat down on the sofa and Mindy squeezed in on my free side.

I could see Mr. Swanson was puzzled with who I was, but noticed Mindy sitting beside me. He greeted my Mom.

“Susan! It’s been awhile since you’ve been over. Where is... Lynn?”

Mrs. Swanson ushered in and sat down next to Fred.

“Fred, I’d like you to meet my daughter, Lynn.”

I sheepishly smiled and waved my hand a little. “Hi!”

Fred’s face went through a mixture of emotions.

Mindy started, “Daddy, I think I should begin and explain things. You see, it all began in Mr. Copeland’s class a couple of weeks ago…” Once again, Mindy and me retold the journey I took into becoming a girl. I could see the look of increduality upon his face at the situation I was currently in. Mrs. Swanson added she had already punished Mindy, and I had to step in and defend myself, since this was entirely my want and doing. No one forced me to be a girl. I was one.

Mr. Swanson then stood up, turned around and thought for a moment. He then stepped closer and squatted in front of me to have a closer look. Being under someone’s intense gaze is unnerving, I’ll have you know!

He swore, “I’d never believe it. I can’t tell you were ever a boy at all. All I see is a young girl. I guess that shows how much I really pay attention to people around me.”

“Lynn, you do plan on fully being a woman for the…”

“…rest of my life? Yes sir. I do. I am absolutely as certain of that as I am of anything. I am the same person, just presented a little differently on the outside.”

Mrs. Swanson interrupted. “Well Fred, what do you think?”

Mr. Swanson stood back up and answered, “She’s fine dear. I was and still am a little surprised, but I don’t see anything wrong with it. But I have to admit, you do look much prettier.”

I breathed a sigh of relief. Mrs. Swanson smiled.

“Next time, however, sort of let me know in advance before you surprise me like that. You really had me wondering who you were at first. Okay? Let’s have dinner!”

Mindy leaned over and whispered rather matter-of-factly, “I told you so!”

I stuck my tongue out at her.

Mom warned, “Girls. Dinner.”

Why do parents always have to interrupt their children’s repartee?

Mindy poked me one last time on the arm and skipped ahead to the table. She can win if she wants, I thought to myself. Letting someone else win sometimes actually makes me feel good inside.

So I let her.
 

*          *          *
 
We had a great dinner and Mindy and me went into her room for a little bit and listened to some of her newest music CD’s before Mom said it was time to head on home.

In the car, Mom said, “You see honey? Things are sometimes better than what you think.”

I looked down into my lap. “You were right. I guess it doesn’t hurt to try and think positive of things. I mean both Mindy and her Mom know what he is like, so I guess I should have trusted them. This whole thing is scary to me, really.”

Mom glanced at me, “Oh?”

“Mom, I get these weird feelings when I am around Jason. I think it’s love, but my body seems to react to him. I mean… “

Mom waited and held her tongue. I found the words I wanted to say.

“…It’s like my body wants him and is trying to get me to go along with, well, being a girlfriend to him. But my brain understands what is happening and it’s really hard to hold back at times. I know your rules, I know common sense, and I am not ready for that sort of thing yet either. But, his presence causes me to react like that to him.”

Mom slowed down at the corner, stopped, turned the corner and began accelerating again.

“Promise me this now young lady. If you feel like you have to give in to him or he tries to push himself onto you — end it. Ride the bus home. Okay?”

“Yes ma’m.” I pathetically groaned out.

“I want you safe sweety. School comes first, relationships later.”

I nodded.

“Has he tried to do anything to you yet?”

I looked at her rather annoyed. “Mother! Would I have let him drive me home if he had? The problem is with me Mom, not him. He has been a perfect gentleman.”

“Okay sweety. I just wanted to be sure. I love you.”

I felt a pang of guilt. “I love you too Mommy.”

Would Jason really keep his hands to himself though?
 

*          *          *
 
“Lynnnnn! Phooonne!”

I never can get decent sleep around here - it’s Saturday morning to boot! I grumbled and trudged out of bed in my nightgown and limped down the hall to Mom.

“Thanks Mom!” My eyes were still squint shut. It was a little after nine still, Uuuugghh!

“What?” I answered the phone in a surly tone of voice.

“Well, didn’t we get out on the wrong side of the bed this morning?” Mindy responded.

“Do you have any idea as to what time it is, Mindy?” I irratatedly asked. My tone of voice hadn’t improved.

“It’s almost noon and we have someone to meet at one.”

“Mindy, it’s a little after nine and you woke me up,” I whined.

“That’s just the point! You have a lot to do before you come over here.”

“Like what?”

“Like eat breakfast, shower, do your hair and makeup, find something to wear that’s going to look good for the guys and you still have to be at my house by twelve. I can’t believe you were still in bed,” Mindy exclaimed, in mock indignation.

“I’m sorry Mindy, I’m still new at this,” I groveled. I tried wiping the crusty sleep from my eyes.

“All the more reason to start getting ready, because it will take you longer, so get a move on girl. See you in a little while.”

I hung up the phone and joined mom in the kitchen.

“Morning Mom,” I said, yawning.

“Good morning sweetheart. Do you have any plans for today?”

“Yes, Mindy wants me to go to the mall with her.”

“Okay. I have a house to show so I’ll be leaving in an hour. Do you want me to drop you off at Mindy’s house?”

“I don’t think I’ll be ready by then. But I’ll start now and see.”

I quickly fixed a bagel with cream cheese and then headed to the bathroom.

I was still blow-drying my hair when Mom called through the bathroom door, “Honey, I have to head off. I see you aren’t done yet. You be careful and call me when you reach Mindy’s.”

“I will,” I replied.

I silently thanked God that Mom was leaving. I didn’t want her to see what I had in mind to wear. Mom was pretty liberal about most things, but I knew she would freak if she were to see what I was going to wear.

Let’s see, I ate my breakfast, showered, shaved my legs and washed and conditioned my hair. Hmm. Can’t do my makeup until I dress. Hmm. I am not forgetting anything.

I was worried that my forms might be loosening, but they were holding firm. I really wish they were real though. Maybe someday, I thought.

I looked at the clock and it was already past ten-thirty. I frowned. Mindy was right as usual. Being a girl does take a lot of time.
 

*          *          *
 
It took forever to dry my hair and style it somewhat. Thank God I had the common sense to pick out last night what I wanted to wear for today! I put on my bra and panties after pushing that ‘thing’ between my legs up inside of me, carefully. My blouse went on next and I carefully tied it under my breasts. My denim hip hugging, miniskirt and white canvass shoes finished my look. I applied a light amount of makeup, definitely accentuating my eyes with some light blue and mascara, but not too much. I looked in the mirror and knew that Rex would definitely be impressed. It was almost noon by the time I had finished my makeup.

I went out to our bus stop, and caught the bus over to Mindy’s. As I stepped down off the bus, I pulled out my cell phone and dialed Mom.

“Susan Collins, Coldwell Bank Realty.”

I held the phone close. “Hi Mom. You told me to call you.”

“Okay Sweety. Is everything okay?”

“Mmm hmm.”

“Have you decided where you would go to yet at the mall?”

I nervously licked my lips before saying, “Not yet. But I haven’t gone into Mindy’s house yet. I’m calling from outside her house at the Bus stop.”

I heard Mom laugh. Yeah, I probably should have talked to Mindy first before calling her.

“Just give another ring once you are at the mall and let me know something about where you will be and what time you’ll head back on home. Okay dear?”

“I will Mom. Love you.”

“I love you Lynn.”

I folded my phone closed and put it back into my purse. That thing is really handy!

Oh, well, here goes.

I walked up to Mindy’s and rang the doorbell.

The door whipped right open and Mindy’s jaw dropped.

“Oh my God! You are absolutely stunning!”

I blushed and looked demurely down.

“Lynn! For crying out loud! You are no novice to being a girl!” Mindy seemed more than just a little upset.

I whined, “What did I do Min? I was just a little embarrassed.”

“Lynn Collins! You know perfectly well how to turn boys on! You just provocatively showed me! Don’t you dare make any moves on my Charlie!”

What the Fudge?

“Mindy! Honestly. I don’t even really want to be doing this.”

Mindy huffed. She looked around real quick and pulled her purse on and shut the door. I noticed a few tears coming out of her eyes.

As we walked across her yard over to the bus stop, I took that moment to really look at what she was wearing. Mindy had dressed pretty much the same as me, except her blouse was more open than mine. I assumed that her parents had gone out for the day since she had dressed like that.

I really don’t know why Mindy just hauled off and was upset at me. It’s not like I offered to go do this, Mindy had to rope me into it. And secondly, I have not been a girl for very long! I really don’t know what I am doing. If Mindy says I’m a natural, then this just has to be my worst luck at doing this right then, because I truly have no idea just what it is I am doing.

“Mindy, come on,” I quietly spoke, concerned, “What’s bothering you?”

We stopped by the waiting shelter and sat down on the bench.

“You!”

“Me?” I replied, absolutely surprised.

Just then I noticed she had lowered her head and I heard her softly crying. I quickly reached into my purse and pulled out some tissues before pulling her to me and holding her.

I forced the tissues into her hand and got her to start dabbing at them to try and slow the destruction of her makeup down some.

“L-l-lynn… I’m ju-s-st s-so jealous! Y-you haven’t… been a girl long. And y-you look s-so much prettier… so much more beautiful than me!”

I sighed. “Mindy,” I quietly whispered, “You are just as beautiful as me.”

Mindy choked out, “No… I’m not.”

I couldn’t believe Mindy was doing this. Usually I would be the one upset at what was happening to me. But… this? Why would Mindy be jealous of me, a girl who isn’t quite a girl completely? I leaned my head against hers.

I offered, “I’ll go ahead, go back home, dress down and come back to go with you. Would that be okay Min?”

“No.” she moaned. Then, in a tone of resignation, she continued, “You just can’t help it Lynn. You are a beautiful person. Your personality, who you are — I feel it. I know the boy’s feel it… and they want you… for being that way. At school, you are the talk in the hallways. All I ever hear is how a lot of the girls are envious and jealous of you. The boys, they all want you.”

Snap! No Way!

“Well, Mindy, you have nothing to be jealous of. You know what happened with me — you were there. All of this, because of a practical joke. I’m actually envious of you Mindy.”

Mindy sniffled and looked up at me. “Why would you?”

It was my turn to hold my tears in. I choked out, “Because… because I can’t… have my own baby.”

Mindy giggled. “Lynn I know there are ways you could have one. Before you get your operation, they can save your… stuff… and can freeze it for future fertilizing.”

I didn’t know that! Hmmm!!!

“You can also adopt a baby too.”

“I’d rather be the one, you know, giving birth? I want to feel the baby growing inside of me. Its a special feeling, I really would like to feel.”

Mindy squeezed my hand.

“My one best friend, who used to be a boy… and I find out he wants to be a mother.”

I grinned. “You better believe it girlfriend. Being a mom is something I look forward to being one day. I actually adore my Mother and saw just how tough it is to be one. I want to be just like her and be a great mom for my own daughter, or son.”

Mindy eyed me with a fascination. “Lynn you just amaze me.”

“Well Min,” I confessed, as I saw the bus approaching us down the street, “I hope you don’t move away.”

Mindy saw the bus too and stood up. She asked, “Why’s that?”

“So we can babysit each other’s children.”

Mindy smacked my arm playfully.

“Being a Mother is the toughest job in the world. And we can help each other. I don’t ever want you out of my life Mindy.”

Mindy pulled her little makeup compact out and held onto it while the bus squeaked stop in front of us. We boarded the bus.

On the way down the aisle, past some men and some other teen boys, both of noticed how they all seemed to stare at me with want. Yeah, I guess Mindy is right. She usually is.

As we sat down, Mindy leaned and whispered a little harshly into my ear, “See? I told you so!! You just look hot.”

I saw that a couple of the boys were looking back my way and eyeing me.

Oh my Gosh! I blushed.

Mindy quickly began touching up her makeup.
 

*          *          *
 
To say that we received some looks would be an understatement. The women frowned at us and all the guys smiled. I guess we had done something right.

We entered the mall and found the guys. From the look on their faces I could tell they were thinking this was their lucky day, and they were probably right.

“Hi guys,” Mindy non-chalantly cooed.

“Wow! You look really amazing!” Charlie blurted, stating the obvious.

“Thanks,” Mindy blushed.

“Hello Lynn. You…you… look really nice!” Rex said, innocently.

Rex might have sounded innocent, but his eyes said something else entirely. I saw the aching desire he had for me.

“Hi Rex,” I softly answered. “Thanks.”

“We should hurry, because the show is going to start in a few minutes,” Charlie said.

“Okay,” we all replied.

Rex put his hand on my exposed hip above my skirt, the way he had his arm around my waist. His hand sent a shiver through my body. I needed to control how I felt!!! I just knew that this was going to be a very interesting afternoon.
 

*          *          *
 
The guys bought our tickets for the movie. I guess that’s one of the benefits about being a girl?

The movie we were seeing was Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World’s End.

Oops! I just remembered! I had to call Mom.

“Rex wait for me for a minute over there please? I need to call my Mom.”

“Okay.”

I walked over to a spot by a door and some movie posters where no one happened to be milling about and pulled my cell phone out. I dialed Mom and returned my gaze back over to Mindy, Charlie, and Rex, who were waiting by the ticket taker for me.

“Mom?”

“Hi Sweety!”

“Mindy and me are watching Pirates of the Carribean 3. The one with Johnny Depp.”

“Okay. What time are you looking at being back home by?”

“I think maybe four or fivesh?”

“Okay dear. I’ll probably be home about then too. Try and get ready and look nice, I’ll be taking us out to dinner at Red Lobster tonight. How’s that sound?”

Mmmmmm! My senses perked up that alright! I loved lobster!!!

“Fabulous Mom! I’ll be ready! Love you!”

“Love you too precious! See you.”

I closed the phone and put it back down into my purse.
 

*          *          *
 
We found our seats in the rear of the theater. Charlie said we should sit in the back row, and since the guys bought the tickets it really was their choice. I personally thought something closer to the screen, like maybe in the middle of the theater would be better, but what do I know?

“Would you like some popcorn?” Rex asked.

“Sure,” I responded. Free food? Who in their right mind would turn down something like that?

Rex returned about fifteen minutes later with a tub of popcorn and a drink.

“I hope you still like coke?” he asked hopefully.

“You remembered!” I flirted, smiling like he was my knight in shining armor!

“How could I forget,” he said, and kissed my cheek.

Woah! I wasn’t expecting that! I felt myself blush when he did that.

We ate the popcorn until the lights dimmed for the show. Rex placed the tub on the ground and placed his hand on my thigh. He began to caress my leg and it felt different from when Jason did the same thing. Instead of the touch being sensuous, and sending shivers of thrill up and down my being, it was coarse and rough feeling - not romantic at all.

Rex was on a mission and it didn’t take him long to move almost directly to my panties! What the Fudge! He hadn’t even kissed me properly yet and was already trying to do more than I would allow ANYONE to do until I was fixed to be a proper girl! I didn’t like what he was doing nor the speed at which he was doing it with either and pushed his hand away.

“Please don’t.” I softly requested. I was trying to be nice about this.

“Huh? What’s wrong?” he whispered back.

“Please don’t go there... between my legs,” I clarified in a quiet response.

“Why not?” he asked slightly louder, the indignation showing in his voice.

“Because I don’t want it,” I softly stated.

I really didn’t like what Rex was wanting from me. With Jason, I felt something special around him. With Rex, nothing at all. This was not like how he was the first time we had met. Then, when we sort of made out, he was a little more refined about it and did things a little more tactfully than he was doing now. I was in the mood for it then as well. Now, he is rough and forceful, and I was not even in the mood now for foreplay. I had absolutely no desire to make out with him.

Maybe I am growing up, or maybe what Dr. Kingston had said was beginning to make sense to me. I was playing with fire. And I knew that he was right. If Rex’s hand had traveled much farther… despite the way I could push myself up inside, if he had felt in there… I would be killed. Rex’s temperament and attitude gave me good reason to fear him if that happened.

“Charlie said you and Mindy both wanted this,” he mumbled.

I looked over at Mindy and Charlie and could see from the position of his hands… Mindy was more than wanting this! Asking for her opinion right now would be a waste of time.

“Rex,” I whispered into his ear, “I’m not Mindy. I would appreciate it, a lot, if you would respect me and move much slower. Please? I realize what we did the first time, but I would really like to know you better before I do something like that again.”

“Okay, if that’s what you want,” he replied, his disappointment showing in his voice.

I placed my hand on top of his. “Thank you,” I quietly finished, visibly showing relief.
 
 
Eventually, when the action in the movie picked up, Rex placed his hand around my shoulder and I automatically snuggled up close to him. I liked this part of being with a boy — being held and feeling safe. But I did not appreciate the way in which Rex had treated me earlier.

I wondered why Jason’s touch affects me like it does? Could it be my feelings for him are different than I would feel for Rex? Or was it something else entirely?

As the movie continued, Rex’s lips found mine. I did like the way he kissed and that started to change my mood. Our kisses continued and I began to relax a little too much. I didn’t realize what he was doing until I felt my breast form moving some on my chest. If he was caressing me before, I didn’t know it because of the lack of feeling. It was made out of some sort of rubber stuff.

I grasped his hand and casually pulled it away from my chest and put it back down around my waist. “Rex, please. That is entirely too quick for that.”

“Why not? I paid for your movie ticket?” he irratatedly defended himself.

“A movie ticket doesn’t give you the right to do whatever it is you want to me,” I argued.

I was pissed!!! If Rex had no better respect for me then I was getting out of here!

“Look at Mindy and Charlie!” he responded, angrily, “Mindy seems to be enjoying it.”

I looked back over at Mindy and saw that he was indeed right. Mindy and Charlie were locked in a kiss, and it wasn’t just any kiss. It looked as though his tongue was half way down her throat. Even more disturbing was where his hand was! Her short skirt was wrapped around her waist and his hand was deep inside her panties. Her legs had moved apart and… omigosh! Well… you get the idea! This was definitely NOT what I had in mind when I came here. If Mindy wanted to be a slut, then that was her business! I wasn’t going to join in no matter what Rex wanted! The first reason was an absolute given! My secret would be discovered! But more importantly, I wanted to remain and be a nice girl.

“Well guess what Rex? I’m not like that,” I angrily retorted.

“How do you know if you don’t try it?”

“Because! I have respect for myself! I’m going to save myself for someone special and someone who will treat me like a person, rather than…,” I pointed over at Mindy, “than that! And I’m not going to try it!”

Several nearby patrons looked over at us and said, “Would you mind taking your argument outta here? ... Hush!”

Omigosh! I am so embarrassed!

“Fine, it’s your loss,” he spat

“I guess it is,” I said and slammed my back deep into the seat, crossing my arms across my chest.

“Fine,” he snorted, having to have the last word, and did the same - crossed his arms.

If I wasn’t actually involved in this situation, I would have been laughing at our actions. We were both pouting like a couple of small children. Funny thing though is, it was all too real and made sense to me.

We remained like that until the movie ended. Mindy pulled her skirt down and noticed my disgusted look.

“What?” she asked incredulously

“You know what! I’ll talk to you later about it.”
 

*          *          *
 
We left the theater and parted company with the boys. I was really angry at Mindy’s lack of morality and she was pissed at me because of my actions with Rex.

“What’s with you?” she asked.

“What do you mean?” I responded, knowing full well what she meant, but I wanted to see if she had the gall to tell me.

“You know what I mean. You were a jerk with Rex!”

“Oh really Miss spread your legs? Just because I didn’t want to go there is no reason for you to be angry with me.”

“You almost ruined it between Charlie and me!” she angrily replied.

“And what was I supposed to do? Hello! Earth to Mindy! There is a difference between you and me!!! I’m sure your friend Rex would just love to find out about it,” I comically reminded her right to her face.

“Or perhaps you'd like to see me killed right in front of you?”

Mindy’s expression turned from anger to remorse when she remembered that I wasn’t like her, in more ways than one.

“I’m so sorry Lynn, I forgot. I keep forgetting that you aren’t like me yet,” she said with true regret.

“No I’m not Mindy. And after today I can see why your mother doesn’t want you to date yet!!!” I snapped. My anger still hadn’t subsided.

“What do you mean by that?” Mindy fired back.

“You know darned well Mindy. The whole theater could see where his hand was. Even I was embarrassed watching what he was doing to you.”

“You could?”

Mindy had been so turned on that she had no idea of what was happening around her. All she could think about was how good Charlie made her feel and not of how wrong it was to be doing it in full view of everyone else.

“Yes you could, and I wasn’t the only one to see what you were doing.”

“Others saw?” she exclaimed, her face turned a bright red.

“Absolutely. You should have seen the two boys three rows down watching you. I even think they were doing something themselves by watching you two go at it. I was so embarrassed,” I lied.

“Oh My God! Just shoot me now,” Mindy groaned.

I felt bad about lying to Mindy about those boys seeing her, but what she had done was wrong. Maybe she’ll think twice before she gets carried away in a theater again? I know I shouldn’t be so indignant. After all I did get carried away myself the last time I was with Rex. But I had done some growing up between now and then.

We didn’t talk to one another as we took the bus to Mindy’s house. I was still angry at Mindy, so my parting was short.

“Bye Mindy. I’ll call you later,” I quietly said.

“Bye Lynn, I’m truly sorry for…” she stopped. I could see the beginning of tears in her eyes, but I didn’t feel like saying anything more.

I walked home from there.
 

*          *          *
 
I needed to rethink my friendship with Mindy.

I love her to pieces, but now, I started to see just what kind of influence she was having on my life. If it weren’t for her I wouldn’t be walking home wearing a mini-skirt and a short blouse with my tummy exposed. I also wouldn’t be upset with the disrespect I had been shown to by a boy. In fact, I would still be a boy, as much as I hated that idea. Ugghh!

I could see just what my mother had concerning Mindy. Mindy jumped into things before looking at what the results might be. Charlie was a great example!. Mindy wanted to date so badly that she allowed herself to be used by a much more experienced boy. She thought she would be loved because she opened her legs to his hand! As crazy as it seems, I might have gone along with what she did too, if I didn’t have the wrong equipment between my legs at this moment. I’ve been a girl for only a few weeks and I was finding out just how hard it was to keep my head on straight. If Jason wasn’t really such a nice guy, I know I’d be in trouble! He treats me so nicely, I forget that I’m not a girl, and like Dr. Kingston warned, it could have fatal results.
 

*          *          *
 
Mom wasn’t home yet when I arrived, so I went to my room and stripped out of my blouse and skirt. I then prompty collapsed down onto my bed and closed my eyes. I wanted to forget about this whole afternoon! I let the tears drip out now.
 
 
I guess I must have fallen asleep. I was startled awake when I felt Mom's hands on my shoulder, gently shaking me.

“Hey there sleepy head,” she said with a smile. “Everything okay?

Mom had asked an innocent question, but will there be an innocent answer? I realized I was laying there in only my bra and panties. I knew that Mom also knew something was wrong. Mom had become my biggest supporter in all of this and had been nothing but honest with me with everything ever since finding out about my being a girl. Now it was my turn to return the openness she had begun sharing with me.

“We kind of had fun Mommy, but there are things I have to talk to you about. We met some boys at the mall and I didn’t tell you about it before we went. I know it was wrong, but I thought all we would do is see a movie. I’m very sorry Mom,” I replied, as tears filled my eyes.

Mom’s reaction wasn’t what I expected. I assumed she would go ballistic. She didn’t though, but had a look of deep concern on her face.

“Did something bad happen to you?” she asked, obviously concerned that she hadn’t been there to protect her daughter.

“No Mom, nothing bad happened. But it came so close to almost happening. The boy I was with… he wanted to, you know… do more than… make out,” I responded as the tears continued to flow. I sat up and pushed my head against my Mother’s soft chest and felt her arms hold me to her tight.

“Why was he like that?”

“Because,” I sniffled, “His friend told me that… Mindy… and I… wanted it! *sniff* *sniff* ”

Mom just cooed to me softly for a moment.

“Why would he get that idea?”

“Mindy… she… wanted…”

I could feel Mom tensing up!

“Ooo, I just knew that Mindy was trouble! What did that boy do to you?” she asked me, more out of concern than anger at Mindy.

“He rubbed my leg and felt my breast. I asked him to not to do it when he touched my leg, but later he went on ahead and felt my breast.”

“What did you do?”

“I got mad at him and ignored him after that. I was really angry and he knew it. But he was mad because I wouldn’t let him touch me.”

“Good girl! Now you know why I don’t want you dating boys yet! There is a lot to learn and you need to know what to do. Now, I’m not very pleased that you lied to me, well, not lie, but omitted important information from me. You could have been injured very seriously by that boy. Luckily, nothing bad happened. But I don’t want you doing what you did, ever again! Comprende?”

I looked up at her through tear blurred eyes and nodded.

“If you’re going to see a boy, I want to know in advance and well before. Let this be a lesson for you. Being a girl is dangerous, and even moreso, for you! When you see Dr. Kingston on Tuesday, I want you to tell him about today. Promise me?”

“Yes Mom. I promise, I will,” I sniffed.

“Okay. How about you go wash your face some and put on your nice green dress? Let’s treat you to your favorite food.”

I couldn’t believe she would still take me out after what I had just admitted to!!! I cried and just hugged her for everything I was worth.

How could I be so lucky to have an awesome parent like her?

---

 
To Be Continued...