At the end of a late summer's day, Jordan just wanted something, anything to happen, but one thing was as tedious as the next until a discovery was made that changed everything and opened ...
Copyright © 2009 by Jan S
This only got written thanks to the help and encouragement of my beta readers, Daphne and Kristina. Big hugs to them both.
1: Set Up
It was late on a sultry August afternoon. The sunlight squeezed through the slotted blinds and cast bright streaks across the drab walls and rug. The blades of the fan threw slow moving shadows that glided through the bright stripes, and that was the only motion; the rest of the world had come to a dead stop.
I leaned back in my chair, poured the last of a Red Bull down my throat, and waited.
A half finished report on summer reading, due Wednesday, was the all that was on my desktop. It didn't need to be done yet, and I needed something for tonight. I needed something to bring my dull life to an end.
The casement window swung open, and Blair was out on a limb once again.
That was our private entrance. Blair Lu had been my partner since middle school, when we discovered we lived on just opposite sides of an abandoned railroad track. We didn't always like each other any more but had been welded together ever since and couldn't do anything about it. Long ago we had nailed rungs to the oak outside my window to make the climb easier.
"How about knocking first sometimes?" I said.
Blair climbed through the window and said, "What for? What were you doing, Jordan?"
I didn't answer. I was about to hear the plan. Blair always had a plan -- seldom a good plan -- but always a plan.
"Get dressed. We're going to the dance," Blair said and stretched out across my bed.
Argument was useless. I hadn't had any intention of going to the dance -- hell, I had had every intention of avoiding it like a cliché -- but those words sealed my fate, and I knew it.
"You sure I was invited?"
"Hey, Jord, it's a high school thing. You're in the honor society and heir apparent to the yearbook editor, but they have to let you in anyway. It's the last waltz, dude! Remember -- school on Wednesday."
I made the expected groan then said, "I'm not wearing stuff like that."
Blair had on a pair of dark blue, pleated slacks, a dress shirt with red pin stripes, a blue and pink tie (the windsor pulled down two buttons) and, in spite of having just climbed a tree, a white cotton sports coat.
"No one has my sense of style. Semi-grunge'll pass,"
I grabbed some gray cargo pants from the pile in the corner and pulled them over the boxers which were all I had on. I said, "You know, if you didn't dress like that half the school wouldn't think you're gay."
Blair shrugged. "And yet your being seen with me is what keeps almost half the school from thinking you are. Strange, huh?"
I put on an almost clean black polo. "Is Tracy going to be there?" I asked.
"Yeah. You mind keeping Andy amused?"
I faked a laugh and said, "Not the way he wants, but I'll be my usual witty self."
As I was shoving my hair under the baseball cap I almost always wore, Blair said, "Can you get us a ride?"
I shook my head. Neither of my usual drivers was available.
We left by the door instead of the window because I had to lock the window and turn on the alarm when the house was empty, and e grabbed some sandwiches from the kitchen on the way out. Blair took the bike my sister left behind when she went to college, and we rode the two and a half miles to the pavilion in Arden Park where the dance was being held.
I wasn't looking forward to this much; dances, the whole social scene, are usually just tedious to me. But I'd been away for most of the summer; my online games had all updated and now my avatars needed rebuilds before I could use them; at least this was something to do.
I was surprised that Blair had become interested in this kind of thing too but, while I was away, Tracy had become Blair's newest Best Friend Forever, and that had to be the reason. She, Blair and Andy were a troika now -- like the three musketeers, and I was a sometimes D'Artanian. I had known both of them for years, or at least of them. Andy was The Quarterback and well known to the whole town; Tracy had almost as much fame as he did, but they hadn't really been among my friends before Blair got to know them. Andy didn't really bother me much. He pretended to have a crush on me, and that could become a pain, but I could deal with it. Tracy was more annoying, especially when she and Blair started with their Public Displays of Affection.
Gay wasn't a scarlet letter at our school. Though we did have more than enough total assholes to go around, many people were tolerant and willing to let others be. Andy and Tracy were both out to everyone that wouldn't care; they used each other to hide their taste from those that it would matter to. Somehow it worked; I don't know how.
Blair I didn't know about at all, especially now and the thing with Tracy.
I mean, in spite of the clothes and everything, she was a girl. At least that is what she had always told me. Since we were kids, she had always preferred her brother's hand-me-downs. She didn't have to wear them, her mother was a successful violist and could have bought new, and she tried to hide her gender in some ways too, but she always wore long earrings or nail polish or makeup, along with the slacks and dress shirts.
She wouldn't tell even me if she was gay or not, not even when I asked her straight out, and she knew it wouldn't make any difference to me. I don't think she had ever gone as far as heavy petting with anyone on either side though. I would have known of it; I felt pretty sure of that somehow. But she did like to play with girls like Tracy. A lot. And I was only along tonight to disguise their relationship.
Just as dusk began, we stashed the bikes in some bushes near the golf course, so we could make a more dignified entrance, and trotted towards the building. A lot of outcasts and sophomores milled about the patio; boys on one side, girls to the other, the few with dates stood in the middle and maintained physical contact with their companions to proclaim their status.
Tracy skipped over to us and put her arms around Blair's neck. Blair grabbed my hand then kissed Tracy 's cheek.
"Hello, little bubble butt," Tracy said to me and bit the edge of her thumb with her lips.
I glared at her -- a response I felt was sufficient for that lame remark -- but Blair rode up on her white stallion and told Tracy to leave me alone.
Maybe Tracy was still unsure of Blair's tastes too, because she obviously saw me as a rival and flaunted her perceived advantage in a contest I hadn't entered.
She was almost seventeen going on twelve and, in spite of her open displays with girls, she really thought she fooled people by holding a boy's hand occasionally. I guess she did fool those who think all lesbians have giant shoulders. She constantly flirts with boys too and is very good at it. Blair thought that was only a mean game; I thought she was practicing for a career as a bedroom actress.
We made our way inside and to the back of the hall where the other juniors were. Andy came over and said, "Hi, Hailey. So, are you trying to steal my date?" Then he put a possessive arm on Tracy's shoulder.
Then Andy started singing "Louie Louie, oh no; Me gotta go."
That wasn't the best way to annoy Blair --to really get to her, use any stereotype about Asians -- making fun of her name is only second best.
The four of us danced one dance, during which it was unclear who was dancing with whom, and then Tracy announced that she had to "pee" and pulled Blair away.
I was left sitting on a stone wall, my feet dangling above the ground, with Andy. He sat down next to me and put his arm behind my back, his palm on the wall, his wrist tight against the center of my ass.
Maybe he really didn't know that straight boys would not sit like that. Maybe he didn't care. There are a lot of people that don't believe a "faggot" can be six feet tall and throw a football forty yards. His coaches and teammates were among those people, I guess, and they were the ones he wished to fool.
"So, Hailey," he said, "you getting any satisfaction from Blair?"
"As much as you get from Tracy ," I said.
"Want to go to my car? I got some Jack Black there."
I said, "If we take a walk alone, Andy, rumors will start."
"Nothing serious. No one is going to believe that about me."
"But they will about me. And your image will take a hit if we hang together too much. I'm not a super jock; hadn't you noticed? "
His grin said he had, and that he liked what he noticed, but he said, "You have more pins on your letter jacket than I do, Hailey."
Running track and cross country, and wrestling as a flyweight didn't move me into that group, and we both knew it.
I said, "Logic's not their best thing," and laughed. "Andy, it's amazing that you can be so fucking assertive, and still be in the closet."
"Do you think I'm in the closet?" he asked and shrugged. "My sister says I am too, but with the door wide open and holding a bright neon sign that says, 'gay'. If they don't want to look, I don't make them, not yet, and Tracy helps them to not have to look too. Someday I'll bash the sign across their heads, -- I will -- but not until I've got my football scholarship. So, what about the drink, Hailey?"
The first, only, and last time I had had a drink was last February, on Blair's sixteenth birthday. She had found a pint of Southern Comfort which we mixed with lemonade. I had managed to clean up my puke before my parents smelled it and planned to never do that again.
"No thanks," I said and asked, "How come you call every one by their last name, but no one calls you Chekhov?"
Andy put his hand on my back and rubbed. "It's a jock thing, and my name is too ethnic; plus it sounds too close to jackoff. I'm six-one and punched someone for slipping up once. It's image, Hailey, and respect. Call teachers by their first name, and they kill you. Call 'em by there last name without something in front of it and you are in real deep shit. But I'm like the super-stars that only need one name."
"It's dis-ing me?"
"Not so much. I'll call you Jordan, but not in front of the team. Like you said: image. And I need those jerks to want to die for me if I'm going to make all-state. And if they hear me use any boy's first name, they will think I'm gay or something."
Good quarterbacks aren't completely stupid.
Good receivers and running backs are a different matter. Numbers 87 and 43 walked up. The one that plays end said, "Scram, Hailey."
In middle school my dojo put on an exhibition each field day. The canned throws bought me lots of room. Then, in my freshman year, a junior over twice my size tried to grab my shoulder with all his weight on one foot. The bruised cheek he got when he hit the floor gave me a rep for minor superpowers.
The assholes wouldn't push things, but most didn't let anyone think they liked me either. I didn't mind.
I got off the wall and went to the snack bar. Tracy was sitting in Blair's lap while she sucked a soft drink through a straw. I told them about Andy's bottle, and Tracy was ready to go to the woods. Both of them knew he wouldn't open it without me there so I went along.
While we were getting the bottle from the trunk, Andy pulled out an Uzi with a two liter bottle attached to it. He turned around and said, "squirrel hunt!" then opened fire, drenching my shirt with the battery powered squirt gun. A group of boys near another car laughed louder than necessary. Tracy laughed loudly too but called Andy an asshole; Blair kneed him in the balls and tried to break the gun. I took the shirt off, threw it at him, and said, "Wash it."
Andy recovered enough to open the bottle and take a large swallow. He was still laughing; he thought the joke well worth the pain. Since he was staring at my torso, I realized why and took Blair's jacket from her.
We took the bottle into the park and sat beside the oversized pond known as Saturn's Lake. Tracy was taking very small sips, and in two seconds began acting soused. Blair knew we would be riding bikes home, so she held her tongue over the bottle lip when she threw her head back.
I did the same.
Blair and I weren't really out here to get drunk. It was just about getting away from the crowd and to do something that might lead to something exciting; just for the lulz. Only Andy made a noticeable difference in the liquid's level as, on each turn, he took a deep gulp and fought off the need to gag. I knew that this was supposed to be a display of macho-ness that was meant to impress me, but it didn't.
We sat on the grass, and Tracy leaned her head on Blair's chest and began to lick her shirt pocket. I wondered if Blair enjoyed that through the ace bandage I knew she was wearing. Tracy was one of the few girls wearing a skirt at the dance, a knee length prairie skirt with a slightly longer ruffle bottomed slip under it. As she sat next to and on Blair, she didn't give a thought to what she showed us. Andy didn't notice, and I didn't stare.
After his second turn, Andy put his legs out, and I let him stroke the knees of my dirty pants with his dirty shoes. "If you get busted or die in a wreck, Andy," I said, "the whole town will kill you."
"Or they will just repeal the drinking age for football players," Tracy said. Football was a very big deal in this town, and Andy, even I admitted, was very, very good at it.
Andy said, "No worry. My sister is here somewhere. She's driving or will find a boy to drive us if she's drunk too. And there is always a second string lineman around somewhere."
He used the need to talk to move slightly closer to me. When his shoe began to caress my crotch, I grabbed it. Blair laughed at me. Tracy giggled and said, "You are just a tease, Jordie. Why are you so mean to our sweet town hero?"
That was when we saw lights moving across the golf course.
"Someone's got alcohol poisoning," Blair said. "Probably one of your linemen, Andy."
"Nah," he said, "they're all too big. They never die before midnight." He took another hit from the bottle and lay back in the grass to show his lack of concern.
The flashlights stopped near where Blair and I had hidden the bikes. We got up to go investigate but stopped when we heard sirens. The music in the pavilion cut out in the middle of a song and all the lights inside came on. Five police cars pulled into the parking lot. Every student knew this suburb had only seven.
Andy was non-reactive; the rest of us started to walk towards the building but, from over a hundred yards away, we could tell that all of the boys there were being lined up by the police.
Blair said, "Jordan, you better wait. Trace, stay with Jord. You've had too much to drink."
But Tracy's drunkenness had vanished, and she said, "No. Wait. The people at the shop will know what's happening."
Her father and uncle owned the largest garage in town and had tow trucks. Someone there would be listening to the police band, and this, whatever this was, would have been broadcast.
She dug her cell phone from her purse. After a three minutes conversation, she turned to us, her face ashen, and said, "The MacGuffin is missing."
"Who the fuck would want to steal the damn MacGuffin," I said.
Tracy said, "Whatever. They did, and all the boys here are being questioned, and they are checking their shoes because they found foot prints by the golf course."
Blair said, "Oh, shit. Let me think."
I felt like I'd been slugged in the stomach. I always did when she said that.
"Jordan, take your clothes off," Blair said after thinking for what was obviously much too short a time.
"What the hell!" I replied.
"Jordan, it's our footprints they found by the fence. Tracy, take off your slip."
Blair was rummaging through the backpack she took everywhere. She emerged with a handful of highlighter pens. Don't get the wrong idea; it isn't because she's Asian that she carried school supplies around in August, it's because she never cleaned out that pack. She's only half Asian anyway.
Then she grabbed my hand and began using a red marker on my fingernails. Tracy grabbed a neon pink pen, yanked my shoes and socks off, and started painting my toenails.
"What the hell are we doing?" I asked.
"Getting you out of here, stupid," Tracy said.
"Jordan, they are only hassling the boys, not the girls," Blair said.
Then I understood the program. I tried desperately to find a different plan. I started to say, "The hell I'm doing this," but when a county sheriff's unit pulled up on the opposite side of the lake, it ruled out swimming for it.
Tracy said, "Blair, you need to look more like a girl too." When had she gotten so smart?
Blair took off her shirt and unwrapped the ace bandage around her chest. She said, "Take your pigtails out and give one of the ribbons to Jordan."
"I have something better," Tracy pulled a brush and a barrette with a pink flower on it from her purse. She parted my collar length hair down the middle and put some of it into the barrette at the back. She managed to get a small, silver one into Blair's shorter hair too.
I finally had my pants off and pulled Tracy's slip on; it was white with purplish threads at all the seams, and reached just below my knee. It was too large to stay up, but Tracy had safety pins in her purse. As she pinned the waist, she said, "Don't do something nasty in that, buster."
I sneered at her.
Blair dragged me to some bushes that were closer to one of the lights around the lake. She had put her shirt back on but still had noticeable breasts. I don't think I'd ever noticed them before.
She took out her mascara, eye liner, and other stuff and began on my face.
"I don't want to look goth," I told her.
"Next time we can worry about your look, Jordan, not now."
When Blair was done, Tracy made me stand up and said, "Needs something." She took off her blouse and bra and had me put on the bra. It was an underwire, of course, white with pink lace at the top.
Blair produced a Swiss Army Knife and cut her ace bandage in two; half went into each cup. Tracy pinned the back of the coat so it was much tighter. The top of my bra showed, and the wire pushed up enough skin to make it look real. She used the scissors on the knife to remove and unravel the lavender bow that had been attached to her blouse and tied it around my waist over the coat.
Then she grabbed Blair's and my shoes and the bottle of bourbon and took them to the lake and threw them in as far as she could. I watched as eighty dollars sank to the bottom of the lake. Tracy was back to her skipping self as she returned.
Blair had rolled up her shirt tail and tied it off under her breasts leaving her stomach showing.
I stared at her navel and its little gold ring. I said, "Christ, you look like a girl, Blair."
"Jesus, so do you, Jordan," she said.
Tracy eyed me up and down, smiled, and cooed as she said, "Ohhh, Jordan, you look so sweet! We're going to have to say you are just a freshman though, baby."
"Knock it the F off, Tracy!!" I said.
Blair told me to keep it down, and Tracy said, "Oh, just chill, Jordan. Get your shoes on quick." She pointed at the wedge heeled sandals she had been wearing.
Blair had produced her pool thongs from her backpack and, while I strapped on the sandals, she took off her belt and strung her necktie through the loops leaving the ends dangling at her side.
Blair said, "OK, now what do we do with him, Tracy?" Andy was still lying in the grass, passed out.
"That's the easy part," Tracy said as she sprayed something behind Blair's and my ears, she gave three extra squirts in my general direction, and then said, "Let's go girl friends."
I said, "No, look, there is no way I can pull this off, not with a bunch of cops. And we can't just abandon Andy. Just being drunk will get him kicked off the team. Then the whole town will fall into ruin."
Tracy sounded calmer and serious. "You really can do it, Jord. And we're not leaving Andy; we're going to get him a special quarterback's cab."
"But what about your shoes, Tracy? Look I'll just wait here."
"Na-uh, that's not what girls would do. You have to come, and those will make you walk better if you're careful. Besides, I go barefoot a lot; I have tough soles."
I said, "Three of them, I bet."
Tracy smiled at me. She had actually got that. Who was this girl?
She looked me in the eyes. "No, no, not really at all."
I took her hand and gave it a squeeze. Immediately, I wondered if I'd just been tricked; I wasn't yet convinced she had a gentle soul at all.
Blair had crammed my pants into the backpack. Tracy wrapped her arms through Blair's and mine and, holding both our hands, led us towards the building. Half way there she said, "OK, Jorie, listen, your voice will be the hardest part. Don't talk if you don't have to, and if you do, do it at the top of your throat, but not from your nose. Try it."
I said, "You know how to whistle, don't you, Steve? You just put your lips together and blow."
Tracy pretended to melt next to me. She said, "You've been practicing, haven't you? But way toooo sexy! Maybe a little more nose, and higher. You're only sixteen. You walk great in those shoes too."
Well, everyone has tried to sound like Lauren Bacall, haven't they? And they were only three inch wedgies, not stilettos.
I used less throat, a higher pitch, and threw in a fake giggle. "Only fifteen. My birthday's still eight days away."
The second we reached the asphalt parking lot, a woman yelled at us. "You girls were told to wait at the gate." She was in plain clothes but definitely a police officer, and definitely thought herself an important one.
Tracy turned it on at once. "Mrs. Stern, hi." Worry dripped from her voice. "I - J - Hailey, can't find her phone! And can't call her parents. And will get killed if she doesn't. And would it be OK, please, if I asked Officer Benwell to shine some headlights over there for just a minute, please?"
"Hell, Tracy, do you know what's happened? Just make it damn quick." Then she yelled to a cop named Lloyd to come and help us.
Tracy ran over to him and got into the front of a cruiser. She screamed at us to meet her there. So Blair and I went right back to where we had just been. Well that was easy! I was kind of disappointed; all that worry for nothing
The cruiser came across the grass and managed not to shine its lights on Andy's carcass. The cop, Officer Lloyd Benwill I guess, laughed when he got out of the car and said, "Hell, I guess if I'as a football star, I could take three pretty girls into the woods at once too, but I sure as hell wouldn't be stupid enough to pass out."
Tracy was talking on the phone as she got out of the car, then she said, "OK, Cynthia is going to be behind the Seven-Eleven. Is that all right, Mr. Benwell?" Cynthia is Andy's sister, a senior.
"Yeah, but we need to do it fast or Lieutenant Stern will skin me, girls. Tracy, if he pukes in my car, I'm going to have your daddy make you clean it up yourself."
"I'll clean it up, but just don't tell him why I have to, OK?"
"How could you'll let him do this with the game against the Ferral High Wildcats just next week anyway?"
Blair said, "OH, we tried hard to stop him, sir. I think he was trying to show off."
"And why would he have to do that? If it happens again, I won't be able to help you."
"We will make sure it doesn't!" I said. Both Blair and Tracy glared at me to tell me to shut up, but the cop didn't see anything wrong with my voice.
It took both Blair and me to get Andy sitting upright but, once he was, he came to. He looked at me, put his arm around my neck, and said, "Hey, Jordan," and tried to kiss me. Then he said, "Hailey! Wow!"
I quickly put my lips on his to keep him quiet. The smell and taste make me nauseous, but he shut up. I could hear Tracy stop in mid-giggle several feet away, and Blair made a demi-retching sound right in my ear.
It took the cop's help to pull and push Andy into the back of the police car, but we got him there.
As Officer Benwill opened the front door, I said, "Can you tell us what is happening?"
"Not supposed to say anything, sorry."
"But why are they arresting every single boy??" I said, hoping to sound weak, scared, and pleading.
"We're not arresting them all at all. Just questioning them. Some boys were seen around the country club building and did something. Did any of you see a boy in a white jacket and dark pants, and one in a black shirt and gray pants at the dance?"
"Lots of boys wear black shirts, sir," I said. "It's like a uniform. But no boy would wear a jacket; it's too hot."
"Well, one did," Officer Benwell said. "Red Kipperman saw him running away from the club house just before the dance."
Tracy said, "Why is everyone so sure that it was a boy that broke into the clubhouse?" Blair's eyes shot daggers at her.
"Hell, no girl could have got up that tree and smashed in that window, Tracy. Come on, you'll get into the car. Let's get a move on."
I said, "We left our bikes over by the fence and can't leave them. We'll get them and head home."
"Wait!" the cop said, "those are your bikes! You two better go and tell the lieutenant that, right now! Go on. Get in, Tracy . You'll are gonna get me into it."
The cop wouldn't leave until Blair and I started walking towards the building and the lieutenant. When we were out of his hearing Blair said, "Why did you mention the bikes, Jordan? Shit!"
"I didn't want to get into the cop car. Duh. How come Tracy knows all the cops?"
"Because their garage takes care of all the town's cars and trucks, and she has worked there, answering phones and things, since she was about eleven, and played there her whole life. Now, why is this Red Kip-what-ever trying to frame us? And who is he?"
"Because he took the MacGuffin, obvi. But I've never heard of him."
"'Obvi??' Jordan, is that mascara getting into your brain, or something?"
I shook that off. "Give me your phone in case the cop ask if we found mine." (My parents are so dumb they don't think I need one.)
Blair reached into her backpack and came out with her phone, my wallet, and a small pink and white nylon bag. It was shaped like a backpack with two straps, but was only about six inches square.
"Do you have a kitchen sink in there? I'm thirsty," I said.
"Kath asked me to hold that for her at the pool once. Just be happy we have it," Blair said and handed me a bottle of water.
Just before we got to the parking lot I stopped. "Blair, she's going to see through this, you know."
"I don't think she will, Jordan. That cop sure didn't. Hell, I think she's more likely to think I'm a boy than that you are. Really, you look good. Relax."
Easy for her to say. I closed my eyes, and thought "PERKY", then I walked over to the head cop.
It took five minutes of standing there for us to get Lieutenant Stern's attention. She wasn't very happy to learn the bikes belonged to us. They had been her best lead, and we had taken it. She asked us about everything we had seen by the fence and at the dance.
Eventually, she stared at each of us and said, "Am I supposed to believe you rode bikes in those clothes and those shoes? Whose bikes are they?"
"Ours!" Blair yelled, "We just rode barefoot. One's a girl's bike, if you haven't looked at them yet. We had to get here and had to be dressed up, Ma'am."
"I'm not buying this. Are you sure you're not really a boy; are you just trying to hide from us?"
I couldn't believe she would actually say that! But she was looking at Blair, at least as much as she was at me, when she did.
"What!!" Blair screamed it loud enough for other cops to look over. "You want me to pull my pants down and show you!!"
"All right. All right," the Lieutenant said, "Some of you kids are a bit strange."
Blair glared at the woman. I said, "Can we go now? My mother will be worried about me."
Just then Mr. Friend, the high school counselor, walked over, probably because of Blair's outburst. "Hello, Blair," he said, "Lieutenant, I can vouch for Blair. She wouldn't have been involved with this."
"Damn it, Arnie, you have vouched for every single kid here all night long!"
"That's because there isn't any way any of these kids would have done it! Why in the world would any of them want the MacGuffin, Jane? And also, as I pointed out, it would have to be someone with a car. They wouldn't have tried to carry the MacGuffin on bikes."
"Well, this is a city park, not the school grounds, so I can't just start inspecting their cars. I suppose you know the other one too."
Mr. Friend had been looking at me while he spoke to the lieutenant. Now I looked up at him for the first time and said, "Hi, Mr. Friend."
I was sure the whole charade was about to come to a crashing end, but the school counselor said, "Hailey?! Yes, Jane, I know - hum-ma - her too. She in the honor society and wouldn't have done this either."
"Let me see both of your driver's licenses," the officer demanded.
"Um, I don't have one yet, Ma'am. I have last year's school ID; that's all."
"Why don't you? Hailey, is it? What's your last name?" She asked me.
"My name is Jordan, and I'm not sixteen yet," I said as I pulled out the ID, which had a picture of me on it. I hoped the light was bad enough, because my hair had been shorter then and a different color.
She glanced at the ID and didn't notice the comma between the 'Hailey' and the 'Jordan' on the card, but she said, "This isn't yours; the hair is brown."
"Yes, ma'am, I dyed it for a costume thing last month. It has started to grow out though, if you want to look." I had tried to get it as white as possible to be a mad scientist anime character at Ani-Con. That was why it was so long now too. I was going to get it cut and re-dyed after the next convention at the end of September.
"Jane, I told you who she is," Mr. Friend said, "I'm sure their parents will be looking for them soon. Can't they go?"
"All right, but not with the bikes. They are still evidence. If you want them back, bring your folks with you and get them tomorrow."
"But ...," I said.
Mr. Friend didn't let me finish. "Come on, Hailey and Lu. Come with me - Now!" he said.
We had walked only a few feet before he turned to me and said, "If you don't want to come with your parents to get the bikes, and I imagine you don't, come in the morning. I'm sure I'll be at the station until at least eleven, and might be able to help you. Or wait until Monday. This whole thing will be over by then. I'm real busy next week, Jordan, but I think we should have a meeting the second week of school about this. No. No," he said, cutting off my interruption, "Not tonight. Get away from the park -- both of you. I want to hear why you want to dress like this, but I can't tonight."
I didn't bother to try to explain any more but just started walking towards the gate. The cops had begun to let the boys go, and there was a parade of cars leaving the parking lot; pedestrians radiated in every direction from the building. A few girls still waited beside the gateway where the road entered the unfenced park.
I steered Blair away from the road; at least out on the lawn there was less light. She chuckled and said, "Stop worrying so much, Jord. No one is going to make you. Told you she would think I was a boy before she did you. It's because of this giant nose of mine. And you've been out of town for most of the last two months; no one's seen you with that hair color yet, remember."
"They saw it tonight, Blair! And will see it at school Monday. But Blair that's the easy part. We are being framed for this! And I've got to get those bikes back somehow before my parents notice they're gone."
"Settle down, Jor! Really. You had your stupid cap on when we were inside. You're always saying it's so dull; well, something is happening. Deal!"
I hate people that say stuff like that, and Blair was the worst because she actually did stay clam so often.
We were walking in a straight line for the group of stores across the street and three blocks from the gate. It wasn't a good destination either, the Starbuck's and Seven-Eleven would be crowded, but it was in our way if we were heading home. Just as Blair said, "Deal", a voice came from some bushes; "Well, hey. It's Blair. Hello, Blair."
Stifled chuckling came from the trees next to the voice.
Sydney Greenway and Lori Peters, two of the girls at the top of my "not favorite people" list, were lurking there. The pungent odor explained the lurking and the laughing. I couldn't believe they would be smoking a joint with all the cops around, but I couldn't believe they had a chipmunk's brain between them either. They always reminded me of some duo in old movies. Syd was husky -- to put it nicely -- and Lori was very thin, sort of like Laurel and Hardy.
Blair said, "Hello, Syd. Good bye, Syd and Lori."
Wait - uhm - a," Lori said, "Have you heard what happened?"
"Yeah, the cops asked all the boys a bunch of questions. Not a news flash," Blair said.
I was trying to stay in the shadows; these weren't people I wanted to recognize me dressed like this."
"Not just that," Lori began, but Sydney finished for her, "It looks like a pipe bomb went off in the high school, and five more have been found. The start of school will be called off for two weeks."
Blair said, "Oh, yeah? Great news. You know who it was yet?"
"Ferral High kids, of course," Sydney said.
"Tee-hee-ehh. Or one of the psycho nerds, like that friend of yours, Jordan or whatever," Lori said.
"Could be, sure," Blair said, and kept walking.
Sydney had noticed me, however, and said, "Blair, you've given up on Tracy and found a new little friend." Then to me she said, "You aren't very tall are you?"
I said, "Well, I, uh, I try to be."
Sydney and Lori laughed -- probably the herb. I doubt they recognized the line from The Big Sleep. It wasn't one of my better ones anyway.
Lori said, "You know about Blair? She doesn't usually look like that, you know. You do know whose side she's on, don't you?" Then she snickered.
I grinned and said, "I don't know which side anybody's on. I don't even know who's playing today." I couldn't believe my luck, two Bogart lines in one conversation, but I had had to deliver them in a high pitched voice; it's impossible to do Bogie and Bacall at the same time. This time Blair laughed though, and I wondered it she had finally recognized a movie quote.
We were saved by the bell, literally -- or almost so; it was eight bars of "I Kissed a Girl" coming from Blair's phone in "my purse". It didn't take much thought to figure out who would have that ring tone on that phone and, since they recognized the song, Lori and Syd were laughing too hard to stop me from moving away to answer it.
Tracy had found a ride, and I wouldn't have to deal with anyone who knew me. They were coming to get us where the bike path entered the park.
When I hung up I said, "Well we're out of the park, and I haven't been spotted. So you were right, Blair, but now I have to do this again tomorrow to get the bikes, and do you have any ideas on how to pin this on Kipperman?"
She said, "Just let the cops handle it, Jord, and Mr. Friend said it would be found this weekend, so wait until Monday to get the bikes too."
"He can't really know that, Blair. And my parents will blow up if they notice the bikes are gone. We need to take this case."
"Take this case? OK, Jord, Tracy will probably know who Kipperman is."
"Do you think the only reason he's framing us is because we were handy?"
"There's a tow truck up by the road. That will be her," Blair said, and we started trotting to it.
We crammed ourselves into the truck, and I wound up sitting on Tracy's lap. That was weird to me, but I was the smallest of us, and she was the largest. She wrapped her arms around my waist and kept stroking my sides. That made it worse.
The driver's name was Dallas McGee, and the second we were on the street he started talking about the game against the Wildcats and some preseason pro game; he didn't seem to noticed we weren't paying attention.
I whispered a question about Kipperman into Tracy's ear, but Dallas heard it and said, "Red's a good ol' boy. He has a landscape company and handles the grounds for the country club too. He likes to give jobs to the boys that play sports and need the money, and gives them time off for practice. It's a good job for football players; almost like time in the weight room. A good guy, but hard core. Don't you girls try messing with him."
He didn't say hard core about what.
We got to my house. Phase two of the gauntlet began. Dallas had left his yellow lights flashing for the whole trip, and having those pull into our driveway reduced my chance of a stealth entrance.
He had to come around to open the door for me because there wasn't a handle on the passenger side. I was going to make a mad dash for it, and started running up the drive, but Tracy further compromised that plan by jumping out of the truck and yelling, "Jorie! You forgot you bag." She came running after me with her little pink pack.
I said, "Trace, that's yours, and you're going to ..." I had to stop when she pushed me against the house and kissed me. Uh - kissed me exuberantly. I had never had someone else's tongue in my mouth before; it was interesting, but this wasn't the right time and I didn't want it to be Tracy's tongue.
I tried to think what Bogart would have said. I knew there had to be a line, but the one thing I'd never rehearsed was turning down a kiss. All that came to mind was, "It's better when you help." But that's Bacall's line and the opposite of what I wanted.
Tracy said, "You really are luscious, Jorie. Mmm, and tasty too." Then she trotted back to the truck; leaving me blushing by the door. That was all not the way it was supposed to be.
3: Interpersonal Conflict
In my biggest break of the night, my parents hadn't come out to investigate the noise or the flashing lights. I took a deep breath, opened the back door, and began to sprint.
My mother was in the den watching TV and reading. She yelled, "You're back."
I ran through the kitchen and up the stairs. My dog, Asta (a cocker, not a terrier unfortunately), chased after me.
I yelled back to my mother, "I'm a homing pigeon. I always come back to the stinking coop, no matter how late it is." I had to say that, I always did and it was expected of me. This time I also said, "I need to get to the bathroom."
I could hear her answering but couldn't understand the words. That didn't matter because I knew what she was saying: "My housekeeping isn't that bad. Come back down, I want to talk to you." She had to say it; she always did.
But her housekeeping was almost that bad. It's not that she was obsessive-compulsive though; she wasn't that organized, and she wasn't so compulsive that she kept old toothpaste tubes or things like that, just everything else.
I got into the bathroom and finally got to view what Blair had done to my face. It wasn't good; too much of everything, but she hadn't had much light. I spread baby oil all over and had one eye looking nearly normal when my mother called from the steps.
"Are you OK, Jor? I want to talk to you."
"Fine, Mom. Just a minute. Burritos," I yelled back through the door. The makeup wasn't being a problem, but I had no idea how to get the marker off my fingernails. Polish remover did a quick, but half way, job. It would have to do, Mom was calling a second time. I went downstairs without a shirt or shoes.
Mom asked me about the dance, and I avoided the question with an "OK," but she had heard about it, so I had to tell her about all the boys being questioned but said I had left the dance by then and not been rounded up.
I asked if it had been on the news or something, and she said, "No. Just all over the grapevine. Seven mothers have called here to see if your father knows anything about it."
"Does he? Where is he?" I asked. My father is the District Attorney. Don't think that made my life easier though; it did just the opposite. What would be little screw-ups for other kids would ruin his career if I committed them, and I knew it.
"No, he won't until the police have more to go on. He went to bed an hour ago," she said.
"OK, I'll do that too. Night."
"Wait, Jordie. Your coach called too. Cross Country practice is canceled for tomorrow, but you are to run three kilometers and call him with your time. Now, come and at least give me a good-night hug, first."
When I did she said, "That's not Blair I smell! Do you have a girl friend? Or did you use something to hide another smell?"
"Mother!? And I thought you were just being motherly. It was a trap. What are you sniffing for?"
"Grass or booze? And that was only a secondary reason; I wanted a hug too."
"You know I don't do that crap. I don't."
"OK. So a girl friend then?"
"I was with lots of girls. That's all you smell."
I was almost out of the room when she said, "Did you paint you nails tonight?"
Oh, hell. "No, Blair and Tracy got wild with some markers, is all?"
"And mascara?"
Shit! "Yeah, that too. Night." Then I got out of the room fast.
I took a shower and worked on my face and nails some more. An emery board was working on the marker but was very slow, I thought of using the edge of a file, but worried about how much damage that would cause to my nails.
Asta started barking in my room, and I knew Blair was at the window.
I wrapped a towel around my waist and let her in. Then I said, "I thought you would still be with Tracy."
"No. That driver dude was told to bring her home. You sure started getting on real good with her all the sudden."
I just shrugged. I didn't think Blair would think I was interested in Tracy, and would see it was only Tracy's moves.
Blair said, "I need to borrow some clothes for tomorrow. We are going to go and get the bikes, aren't we?"
"I guess it would look suspicious if we didn't. But, Blair, do you think I can do that again? In day light?"
"Yeah, you can, Jord. No choice." She had opened the secret panel behind my Murder, My Sweet poster.
My house was a ranch style, originally only one story. My room, the only one upstairs, was added later and was very long with a low, sloped ceiling and a dormer over looking the back yard. At one end of the room was a hinged piece of paneling that led to a crawl space. When the rest of the house got too full, my mother had me pile things in there. Blair knew lots of my sister's old clothes were in there.
"I'll look, Blair. Just a second and let me get something on." I took some boxers into the bathroom; asking Blair to turn around or something would have been useless. When I got back, Blair was standing in the storage room holding my tits.
"Damn it, Blair. Put them down!" I said.
"I doubt your sister ever owned these. She wasn't that worried about things like that. Even when she was smaller than these."
I grabbed the breast forms from her and said, "I got them to wear on cross dress day at nerd camp. You were there."
"Oh, yeah. You did look good. So you spent forty bucks to have boobs for one day?"
They had cost a lot more than that, but I didn't answer. Instead I took my breasts from her and said, "The stuff on the right will be too small for you. Look through the piles on the left."
Blair laughed and said, "You have the stuff that fits you separated? Are you a transvestite, Jordan?"
"The order is chronological. Look, you're one to talk, aren't you? Just grab some jeans and go. I've got to get to sleep."
"Uh, I'm not a transvestite, Jordan. I'm a girl. Remember?"
"Blahhck!" I said, "You are. I looked it up, and the word works for women too, Blair."
"Yeah, well, you know if you let Tracy know you like to dress up, she will crawl down you pants - or rather up your skirts - in a flash, Jorieeee. You would like that, huh, 'Luscious'?"
"Come on, Blair, I'm not interested and neither is she really. You know that."
"No I don't. I brought you some lip gloss and eye liner to use tomorrow, but you probably have some, right?"
"Shut up, jerk!"
I grabbed a long skirt that I thought would fit her and a pink t-shirt and threw them at her. I told her again to leave, but she wasn't done.
"You know that store, Hotz-N's, on Fifth Street. They have gaffs there. Ask for Terry; say you know me."
"Shut up, Blair. But you know where to shop. I guess they have things for female cross dressers too, huh? And you don't have girl's clothes to wear for even one day!"
Then I heard my mother's voice on the stairs. She said, "Who is up there, Jordan?" She was actually coming up to my room, a very rare occurrence. She opened the door and said, "Oh, hi, Blair. I think it is too late for you to be here."
"I was just leaving, Mrs Hailey," Blair said. She slapped the two tubes of makeup down on my desk and headed for the window.
My mother told her to use the door. At first I worried about my mother seeing the makeup, but that worry vanished when I noticed my breasts still lying on the bed. I sat on the bed and tried to push them under the unmade sheets.
Blair left by the stairs without another word to me. As she walked away, I called, "I'll take care of those things tomorrow by myself, Blair."
Mom said, "What were you fighting about?"
"A long story, Mom. Let's do this in the morning, OK?"
"Jordan, I want you to tell me what is going on. Not just this fight, but are you doing things and keeping them secret?"
"Mom, I told you I don't do drugs or get drunk. I promise. You have to trust me or lock me up. You've said that yourself."
She sat in the chair at my desk, and picked up the makeup. "I mean other things, Jordan. You can confide in me. I won't blow up, honey."
"Blair just has some weird ideas," I said.
"OK, some other time maybe. But, Jordan, it is time for you to take those steps off the tree. You are both too old for that."
"Trust, Mom?" I said, but I was also thinking it would be nice to not have Blair pop in all the time any more. "I didn't ask Blair to come over. I want to run before it gets hot tomorrow since I don't have practice, so I need to get to bed."
She sighed before she got up and said, "Good night then, honey. I love you."
"Me too you," I said, and she left.
I didn't expect to sleep well. I needed to find a way to prove that Kipperman had stolen the MacGuffin. I still had to come up with a way to get the bikes. It looked like I was going to have to go out dressed as a girl again tomorrow. And now, I had to figure out what the hell was going on with Blair too. She couldn't really be jealous of me because of Tracy's games with me, could she?
End of Part One
Jordan is pulled deeper and deeper into the mystery of the MacGuffin's disappearance as more and more suspension is cast on him and his friends. Then, just when it seems he has a new lead, disaster strikes.
Thank you, Kristina and Daphne and all who read, voted and commented on the first part of this story, for all of the help and encouragement!
Copyright © 2009 by Jan S
8 am; Saturday morning. Almost invisible I passed down the streets as they came awake. Old men walked across lawns to retrieve newspapers unaware of what had happened during the night. Women gazed out of windows oblivious to the differences in the world. Children chased balls across lawns not knowing that today was not just another Saturday morning.
My feet pounded the hard pavement, step, step, step. I seemed to be just one more person training on the suburban streets, but each step was taking me further and further from the past; deeper and deeper into The Case of Missing MacGuffin.
And closer to the scene of the crime.
The phone had rung at seven-thirty this morning, early for a call on a Saturday, even in my house, but it was a good time to run in August, and it only took me twenty minutes to convince my body of that.
My father was still on the kitchen phone kitchen when I got downstairs. He held up his hand to tell me to wait. While I drank my orange juice I realized that he was talking to Ms Lu and something had happened with Blair.
As soon as he hung up, he said, "Were you with Blair last night?"
"Most of the time. What's happened?"
"The police came and got her about seven this morning. You weren't involved in it, were you?"
"NO! And neither was she, Dad. You can't think that. Can't you do something."
"I really can't, Jordan. I know her too well to get involved at all. You understand that."
"But she was with me the whole time we were at the park. She couldn't have taken the MacGuffin!"
"The MacGuffin? Is that what this is? I didn't even know that yet. I going to find out what the police want her for. But that is as far as I can go.
"I'll be busy today, but your mother has some plans for you. Go do your run, and hurry back."
"I need to do some things this morning, and I have to do something to help Blair, Dad."
"Stay out of it, Jordan. I don't want you mixed up in it. Understand. I thought you were kind of getting tired of her anyway. And I heard you two had a fight last night. So stay out of it."
"When a man's partner is - in trouble - he's supposed to do something about it. It doesn't make any difference what you thought of - her. She was your partner and you're supposed to do something about it. And it happens we're in the' ..."
"Detective business," my father said, trying to cue me past a pause.
"...same high school," I said. "Well, when one of your organization gets - arrested - it's - it's bad business to let them get away with it, bad all around, bad for every - student - everywhere."
He laughed and said, "Don't get your name in the paper."
Now I was jogging to the country club. The first thing to do is investigate the scene. That's the way it is always done, and I needed information. Information about what the police knew, or thought they knew. Information about what had really happened.
I made plans as I jogged. I would go into town as Hailey Jordan, the girl. I really had no choice. The cops expected a girl to come and get the bikes, and a girl should show. If they suspect her of being Blair's accomplice, they would only be more suspicious if she didn't. Also, my father told me to keep my name out of the paper and, if Hailey Jordan was in town, then Jordan Hailey wouldn't draw any attention, right?
At least until after the strip search.
I veered off the bike trail and began a loop of the golf course, jogging along the paved cart path.
The scene of the crime was easy to spot. About a dozen people stood, walked, or crawled around in an area marked off with yellow tape.
A second story window had been broken, even the sash was splintered. Near the window was a single fir tree; its branches barely reached the window sill. I could only look from a distance, but I couldn't see how someone could use those limbs to climb into the room.
I was going to turn around at the fifteenth green and make another pass by the building when I saw a small red pickup pull up to the garden shed at the back of the course. A man with red hair got out of it. That must be Red Kipperman.
He carried a long green pole from the back of the truck into the shed and came back with a wooden crate. He placed the crate carefully on the front seat of the truck.
The MacGuffin! It had to be.
Someone yelled, "FORE!" I had stopped where the path crossed a fairway. I started running towards the shed again, but Kipperman jumped into the driver's seat of the truck and came towards me, cutting across the grass.
I turned around and went the other way. The truck got onto the paved path and kept following. Kipperman must have recognized me.
I didn't panic, but I sped up and I cut across the fairways and than raced towards the park and the public trail. I climbed the fence and then look back. Kipperman drove straight over to a cop, and the policeman dashed to his car and drove off.
That police car was coming up the boulevard as I came out of the woods. I shifted into a full sprint now, cut a corner and dodged cars to get to the other side of the road and the Burger Haven parking lot before the cop got there. I ran past the storefronts, dodging most of the window shoppers, shoving a few out of the way and hurdling two strollers.
I ducked around the building and into an alley just as the cop saw me and blasted his siren. I ran down the alley and I crawled through a well known hole in the fence
I was on the trail again. The officer saw me but couldn't follow. With his siren wailing, he sped off. He was going to try to cut me off at the next road crossing!
I worked my way through some brush to get to the strip mall on the other side of the path. I ran behind the McDonald's and ducked behind the dumpster gasping for breath.
Two cruisers moved slowly up the road, their lights on. One of them made a slow loop around the McDonald's. In a gap between the buildings I saw another police car roll slowly down the next street. There were at least three of them looking for me now, and they were fanning out towards my neighborhood.
I stayed as far from the roadway as I could and went the other direction -- fast. I was now heading towards the far end of the park, away from my house.
I had on red nylon running shorts, a yellow Lakers' jersey, and one of my red baseball caps. I would stand out anywhere, but the park, full of other runners and cyclists, was better than the streets.
Just as I got ready to dash across the boulevard again, I saw them, one on each side of the road, and both moving towards me. I spun around looking for a tree or car to hide under.
Then I heard someone call me. I glanced back and saw Andy's maroon Toyota. Damn, I didn't want to deal with that now.
"I'm not going to jump you," Andy yelled. "Just get in."
He didn't need to go that far to be as annoying as all hell, but still I needed to get out of sight.
I was bent over and huffing hard as Andy smiled and said, "I had a vision of you last night. You had pink lips and big eyes and smelled like Tracy, and you kissed me."
"Were there pink elephants floating around my head too?" I said, still out of breath. "What are you doing up, anyway. Your head should feel like a balloon full of rocks."
"I couldn't tell my father I was hung over, could I? I've thrown fifty footballs through an old tire and run thirty forty-yard sprints, most of them sideways, this morning, Hailey. What have you done?"
He was at a stop light, and his hand was on my thigh; he spread his fingers apart, and the smallest one found its way under my shorts.
I grabbed the finger; it was as thick as my thumb and longer than my palm. I moved his hand back to his side of the car and said, "Run about four kilometers and then did an eight hundred meter steeplechase."
"That's a weird training program you've got. Jordan, are you really not gay?"
He was trying to surprise me with the sudden question. It worked, but I made an effort to not move, to neither shake nor nod my head.
Suddenly he put his hand on my shoulder and pushed me forward hard. "Tie your shoe!" he said.
As my head went below the dashboard, I saw the police car going through the intersection.
"How did you know they were looking for me?" I asked as I sat back up.
"I was in the drive-thru when you jumped into the dumpster. Why are they after you?"
I told him it was only behind the dumpster and asked him how much he remembered about last night.
"Everything, Jord. But especially your kiss, and the reason for it. I didn't really pass out, but when the girls started dressing you up I decided to watch. It was strange, pretending to be drunk for a cop, but it worked out. I don't think your disguise would have worked on me."
"What if we had just left you?"
"Nah. I know Tracy better than that. Actually this worked out better than anything else could have. And you did look good, babe."
I scowled at him, "That's not your type, I thought."
"Don't know. I might expand my interests, and I knew who you were. Are you really not gay?"
"Fuck you, Andy. Just fuck it. It wouldn't matter if I were or not. The only reason you can be around me is because I'm your girl friend's friend's friend. If the girls aren't close by, I can't be either. If that had been a linebacker or coach back at that intersection I'd have had to hide under the dashboard too. Image! And trying to get your pinkie on my winkie isn't going to change that."
This time Andy was the one to avoid any reaction. I went back to the important subject. "OK. So you know about the MacGuffin? This guy named Kipperman is saying that Blair and I took it. The cops arrested her this morning."
"Holy shit. Kipperman is a real asshole all right. I know guys that have worked for him. But if the cops are after you, Jord, you should just stay inside -- lay low."
"I've got to help Blair. And I've got to go get my bikes back; the cops have them."
Andy stayed quiet until the car pulled onto my street then he said, "I want to help you help Blair."
"Could you give me a ride to town center in about an hour? And not give me any shit. And keep your hands fucking off me. I'll try to be invisible."
"I'll try and do all that."
I went inside and soaked my head under the shower for a long, long time. The song, "I kissed a girl", kept running through my head, and it made me think of Tracy and of her kiss last night. When I was holding my breast on, waiting for the glue to set, I heard it again and remembered Blair's phone was still in the little pink pack that was sitting on the back of the toilet.
I couldn't get to it before it stopped ringing, but I pushed recall and Tracy answered at once.
Before I could say anything, she said, "About time sleepyhead. I've been calling and calling. Did you forget we have plans for today, lover?"
I said, "Tracy, it's not Blair. It's Jordan. I still have her phone."
"Oh, Jordan. Can you run over to her house and get her then."
"Tracy, the police got her this morning."
"What? Oh, God, oh God! We have to do something. What have you done so far? Make your father let her go!"
"It doesn't work like that. But I'm going to go down there and get the bikes and see what is going on."
"OK. Jordan, all right. Uh - call and tell me what happens. Bye."
Ah, the good old Tracy had returned.
I ran down the stairs once I was dressed, but this time my mother was in the kitchen. I told her I was meeting someone and needed to hurry. That worked just as well as expected -- not at all.
"Jordan," she said, "We need to go to the store today and get you some things for school next week."
"Mom, I'm going to be busy helping Blair. Remember, I'm a junior. You don't need to come with me to buy binders and crayons anymore."
"Don't be stupid, Jordan! You have a birthday in a week and there is something you have been begging for for years, and it requires me to sign a contract. I thought you would want it the first day of school and to be there to argue about how many extras it has."
"A phone!"
"Yes, and, Jordan, if you still want to get your ears pierced, we decided you can do that today too. But was that just for the costume convention you went too? I think that has kind of gone out of style for boys, hasn't it?"
"No. Some people still do. But there's a place that will put in keepers -- so you can change the studs while the holes heal -- that's where I want to get it done, and it's not at the mall."
"And mothers aren't welcome there. They still can't do it without my consent. Jordy, we will go to the mall, get the phone, and then I'll take you to that place, sign the papers and leave. After that you can do the things you need to do."
"I need to meet someone right now though, Mom. That all sounds great, but I really have to do this for Blair."
"What is it you plan to do to help Blair?"
"I'm just going to talk to some people, Mom. That's all, and they won't even know who I am. Really. I have to do something for her!"
She sighed in a way I've never seen anyone else sigh. "Jordan, don't take chances, but I appreciate your commitment to her. Let's meet somewhere in few hours then, OK? I only offer because I still like you in spite of spending sixteen years with you. I've forgotten exactly why though."
"Gosh, thanks Mom," I said.
How could I pull this off? I had planned to take off my hoodie and put on some makeup in Andy's car. But Mom's plan meant that I'd have to change back some how, somewhere. I couldn't see how it could be done; I couldn't see how I could get back into the house if she was waiting for me either.
Then Mom said, "And, Jord, don't worry about how you are dressed when I pick you up." She reached over and grabbed the lace edged collar of the pink top I had on under the black sweatshirt.
After a deep sigh, I said, "Mom, I'm just wearing that for Blair. It's just a disguise so I can find out what is going on."
"I see, Jordan. It is all right. I've only seen pictures of you on cross dressing day at your camp, and a glimpse of you getting out of that truck last night. I wouldn't mind seeing the real thing -- I think -- maybe -- I wouldn't mind."
"I don't think Dad would feel like that about it, even if he knew it was just a disguise."
"Jordan, I won't tell you he would be happy. I won't even promise he would never yell about it. I will promise he will never beat you because of it, or throw you out, or stop loving you because of anything like that."
There was an awful lot of potential drama that wasn't covered in that promise, and we both knew it.
I said, "It is just a disguise. That is all."
She said, "OK, Jordan, this is the real problem. He would not care what you are, as long as you are an honest and good person, except for one thing. Some men, and you father is one of them, get very attached to their Y genes. They think the X's get all mixed up and don't count, but the ones on the Y chromosomes always stay the same and give them immortality as long as their sons have sons who have sons forever. It is mostly the fear that you will choose to not have children that bothers him, Jordie."
"Geez-Us, Mom! Actually, it is only mitochondrial DNA that last forever, and that is all from the woman anyway."
"OK, get out of here. Now I've got to look on the internet to figure out what you just said, and it isn't about science, and you know that, Jordan."
"You're not gonna freak out if you see me looking like a girl? I really am just doing it to help Blair, you know. Promise."
"I never said that I wouldn't freak, but I'll do it all on the inside -- at least when we're in public. Let's say about two at the Starbucks near my office. Get me an iced grande skinny latte if I'm late. And please just don't get into trouble!"
I finally got out the door, and Andy was already out front. It was ten after ten, and Mr. Friend had said he would be at the police station until eleven.
Andy didn't reach over to pet me when I got into his car this time, but he had reached across to open the door for me.
I took off my hoodie that hadn't hidden anything from my mother. When Andy saw the pink top with shell sleeves and laced hems, he said, "Very pretty color, Jordan." Those were the first words he had spoken.
I was also wearing some tight straight leg jeans with embroidery around the pockets, and red and white thongs. I had a royal blue nylon back pack that I never used. It had my school's name, Northfield High, on it in yellow and was semi-uncool but could be used by girls in a pinch.
I took out the makeup and used the visor mirror to put on the lip gloss. I used a little blush to make it look like I had more cheek bones too. Andy kept turning his head way too often. Makeup in the morning was not common in my group, but I thought I needed the help.
I made him pull into an empty parking lot. I didn't think I could do my eyes when the car was moving.
As he watched me, Andy said, "You're real good at that. Do you do it a lot."
"I did tech for the school play last year and helped with make up. That and Halloween stuff."
"And?" Andy said.
"Cross dress day at summer camps. OK?"
"And??"
"Once at an Ani-con thing."
"And?"
I just stared at him that time. He said, "Blair said you went to that Anime thing as Sensei Yekosue. I thought that was why you had white hair."
"I went the second day with my sister as his female form. OK?"
"Wish I had seen those," he said with a huge grin.
"Andy, knock it off. You don't like girls. Remember?"
"Gawh, Jord, it would have so many advantages though. If it were full time. But -- I don't know. Might as well be straight if it is full time, huh?"
"Being straight has its advantages. And its disadvantages."
"Like what? I don't know of any."
I shrugged. "There are some."
"And how would you know?"
I didn't answer that.
When I put the makeup into the pack, Andy raised my arm up and shook his head. "You have shaved there! But you have a few wild hairs. There are some little scissors in a first aide kit in the glove box. Cut them, Jord."
"Can't. I have to change with the cross country team sometimes. It's not that much."
"Go ahead and do it, Jord. The cops might get suspicious of hairy pits and that top. Cross country types aren't going to go crazy about it; that's the reason they don't play football. You will look better."
Andy got out of the car at the town hall; that was a surprise.
"You're coming?" I asked.
"Yeah, a girl that looks like you wouldn't go anywhere alone. What name do you use."
"Hailey Jordan," I said.
He laughed. "Very clever. Let me hear your voice."
"I didn't really pick it, Andy. The cop and Tracy did, sort of," I was using my high pitched Bacall.
Andy smiled and took my hand. His hand was huge, and I noticed there was comfort to be had in holding onto something so strong.
Half, or more, of the people at the front desk of the station recognized Andy. He started to ask about Blair, but I jumped in and said I just needed to talk to Lieutenant Stern about my bicycles.
The talkative receptionist ignored me and answered Andy. She said that Blair had been released -- that was a relief -- but that she was to stay in her house or at school until the case was settled.
I pretended to know nothing and asked what case she meant. She talked on and on, but either did not know what information the cops had, or was cleaver about hiding it.
Eventually we got the directions to the Lieutenant's office. Her door said, "Director -- Juvenile Unit." Andy opened the door and we found ourselves right in her office.
"Damn it! Knock!" the detective barked at us. Mr Friend was standing behind her and looked startled.
I said, "Sorry, we thought there would be a waiting room, Ma'am. We're sorry."
"What do you want?" That time she was growling.
"You told me to come by this morning and talk to you about our bikes, Ma'am."
"I also told you to come with your parents. Not the quarterback."
"Yes, Ma'am. Andy gave me a ride. My mother and father both have to work today."
"And what do your parents do Ms Jordan -- on Saturday."
"They're both lawyers, Ma'am. They work every day of the week usually."
The cop sat up a little straighter. My parents had always told me to tell the police that they were attorneys right away. That was because I would have the right to see a lawyer even when I wouldn't have the right to see a parent. I always knew there would be other effects too without being told.
Mr Friend spoke up. "I don't think you need to keep - umm - Jordan, considering the information you have now, do you, Lieutenant."
"No. Go on and leave. I'm sure you have important things to do. Wait. Who were you and this Lu girl with last night, what boys?"
"Only Andy. He was the only boy we were with, Ma'am." Mr Friend almost laughed when I said that. I guess because I didn't include myself as one of the boys, but I assumed that she meant besides myself, or would have if she knew I was a boy.
"Did you see a boy wearing a red baseball cap?"
"No, Ma'am. I didn't see anyone wearing one." Well, there weren't any mirrors in the pavilion, and even that wouldn't have been actually seeing myself, right?
"All right, go."
I said, "My bikes?"
She started to write a note. "They are at the property warehouse on Sunset. Do you know where that is?"
Andy said no, and the Lieutenant put the address at the bottom of the note.
This was too damn easy! What was going on? Andy grabbed my hand and tried to pull me from the room, but I said, "Mr Friend, could I talk to you for a minute? Please."
In the hall I asked about Blair. All he would say is that the police now thought it was an inside job, but still believed Blair abetted it in some way.
I told him that she couldn't have because she was with me from the time we left the house until we got to the dance.
"Yes, Jordan. And they think a boy also helped. Do you know what that means? Listen, I need to talk to you at some length -- not about this, or your new look -- about your class schedule and the advanced classes you are taking. Will you be at the football scrimmage tonight? I'm sure Andy would like you to watch and would give you a ride home. You can do that, can't you, Andy?"
I had never even been to a game, and going to a scrimmage was for real die hard fans, but Andy wasn't even trying to hide the fact that he liked the idea, so I said I'd be there.
Mr. Friend said, "Good, good. Well you be dressed in this style tonight? You don't seem to be recognized in your new outfits."
I just shrugged, but I hoped I'd have the chance to change before I went to the high school stadium.
"Yes, this is Sunset Boulevard. It's about five o'clock in the morning... ' " I said as we turned onto the street with that name.
"Yeah," Andy said, "Oh, that's one of you movie things, huh? But this is Sunset Drive and it's almost noon."
It was a street of plumbing supply stores, self storage places, and body shops. The town government warehouse was a huge metal building between a spa/hot tub shop and a lot full of totaled cars. The only person at the warehouse was eating a sandwich and didn't bother to either help or hassle us.
The cars back seat folded down to pass through to the trunk, but the bikes barely fit. I made damn sure to look in the trunk first. I didn't want to get soaked again, but Andy's gun wasn't there.
I told him, and he said, "Huh! Looking for revenge, Hailey? You would have a long walk, or bike ride, if you did that, no matter how cute you are. My sister must have taken it. She won't leave my shit alone."
We got the bikes in with one sticking out and the lid tied down, but there wasn't enough room to put two large boxes back in. Andy said they were just the old bottles and newspapers to be taken to the recycling center.
"My mother makes us carry it around if we forget to put it out for the trucks. Just leave them by the building," he said.
"Hey, we can't just leave them sitting here."
He laughed at me and said, "Tree hugger too, huh. Our name isn't on any of it, and it won't be any problem for anyone, they recycle here too." He tossed the tags that had been tied to the bikes on top of the boxes and we left.
So now I had the bikes back. I had gotten Blair out of jail; well, she was out anyway, even if still under house arrest. I used Blair's phone and left new messages at her house and on Tracy's cell.
"Now we have to find some information about Kipperman -- find a way to prove he did it," I said.
"NOW we have to get lunch! I know a great burger place near here."
"Andy, we haven't gotten anywhere on this case, and I don't want to go places with lots of people, no matter what Mr Friend said."
"NOW we have to get Lunch, Jordan. I'll buy. You're not likely to be recognized at this place. We're in the Ferral High school district."
The place was called Big D's and looked like a dump from the outside, but the inside was mostly clean. It was twelve-thirty but the place wasn't crowded. Eight people sat at three tables. Three more sat on a bench waiting for to go orders, and a delivery guy was filling a thermos chest. Two waitresses in pink uniforms were out front, and two men in aprons and paper hats were working behind the pass-through counter.
The older waitress and the cook both knew Andy. I was starting to get used to that; still seventeen, and he was a local celebrity. Andy sat next to me in the booth and ordered two double burgers and a large onion rings. I had a "salad burger"; a pile of lettuce, grilled onions, mushrooms, tomatoes, and cheese on an open bun. We got malts because they were real malts.
"The day is shot," I said. "There is no way we're going to get anything on Kipperman. I have to meet my mother at three."
"Yeah, and I'm supposed to run drills with my father today before the scrimmage tonight. What are we going to do with the bikes, Jord? My sister is going to be using the car later."
I hadn't even thought about that. And the cops had destroyed my lock too. We decided to try to leave them at Tracy's garage on the way to my mom's office.
The football coach was running the practice scrimmage on a game day schedule, so the team would know what to expect when the real games started next week. It began with a team dinner at five thirty, and Andy wouldn't be available until ten or eleven.
"Take it easy," Andy said. "We will figure it out. We know it is Kipperman. Some of the ball players work for him sometimes. I'll see if they know anything tonight."
"Thanks, Andy, I know you don't care for Blair much, but I have to do something."
Andy put his arm around my shoulder, and I let him. I even leaned my head against his chest, I don't know, some how it seemed OK to do that now, and I was feeling very low about getting so little done for Blair.
"Lu is OK. I don't have anything against her," Andy said with shrug.
The waitress brought our food. "What's Tracy going to say when I tell her who you brought in here, Andy?"
"No, no! Don't tell on me, Maggie!" Andy said, laughing.
I moved Andy's arm and said, "We're just friends. Tracy's a good friend of mine too. Andy just gave me a ride, and she will be OK with that."
"Uh-huh," Maggie said and left.
I laughed and said, "Your neon sign in the closet is amazing, Andy. Everyone in town knows you, but nobody knows about you. Except that tons of people do know all about you. Must be nice."
"Yeah, well it helps that some people just won't see, but the people who know about me aren't the ones I spend most of my time with or the ones I want it to be a secret from."
"Yeah, but that's hard to pull off."
"Not so much, Jordan," he said. "High school's two worlds, maybe more, but they're in two groups. The geeks, dweebs, and queers; and the jocks and preps. 'Course most of the girl jocks are in the first group, but not all of them."
"Right, cheerleaders aren't ever queer. Look at Tracy. And neither or preps or jocks."
"Exactly. That is how it works." he said and smiled. "What one group knows doesn't get to the others much. There's also the stoners, and they actually talk to both groups, but no one listens to them. They don't even listen to each other."
"I never thought you were so analytical, Andy."
"Oh, football is an analytical game, you know. Got to read those defenses and all that. -- And then there are some other games I play."
Andy reached over and fingered my sleeve. I let him and smiled. I said, "OK, so you only let the socially inept know your secret. People like me, huh?"
"Some people in those groups are zoned, Jord. Some are just antisocial, or withdrawn. It amazes the jocks that anyone will put up with people like that. And the jocks figure you're a geek just because you're of the short persuasion."
I laughed and said, "Who persuaded me? Anyway, I'm not that short, almost twentieth percentile."
"Uh-huh. You're shorter than Lu by a couple of inches, and she's Japanese."
"She's half Chinese. My father had a huge growth spurt when he was seventeen, got him all the way to five nine. I still have hope, but my mother is short too. And that's a year away still anyway."
Now he laughed, amused by my ambition of reaching five nine I think. "You are about as far from socially inept as anyone I know, Jord. You just let all the crap roll off of you. Even my crap. I try to do that, but it all just eats at me."
Sitting next to Andy in the booth was like being in a hole. I had been sitting on my legs just to get high enough to look around him and see his face. When I finished eating I noticed that one leg had gone to sleep.
"Ouch," I said as I moved it, "my circulation should be better than that. That run this morning was not a good idea."
"Give me you leg," Andy said, "I've been massaged by real pros."
"OH!" I said. "You do have a wide range of experience!"
"Not that kind of pro! Trainers and college managers. Like that. While you go to geek camps and study physics and philosophy and how to cross dress every summer, I'm at football camps, learning the skills of my trade, and being watched by scouts."
"Ohhh," I said, mimicking admiration, but I put my legs into his lap and let him rub them. He did have a good touch.
"You really don't know, do you? Jord, I've gone to university camps since I was twelve; they are by invitation. I have my own page at ESPN dot com, and more on the scouting sites. I've already been offered scholarships to twelve schools, Jord. One offered my father a job. I ain't just a local big snot; I'm legit national hot shit."
Andy's father was an insurance salesman, but I knew he'd once been an assistant coach at a small college and was involved with the sports programs run by the town parks department.
"You're kidding? Real good schools too, huh?"
He laughed and said, "The best. Some that have been to bowl games ten years in a row, even some recent national champions."
Those wouldn't be any of the schools my parents would call 'good', but I wasn't in Andy's line of work. "So where are you going?" I asked.
"Not going to say yet. Hell, I have to be careful about what colors I wear these days." He nodded at his hand on the table, and I looked at it. It was laying palm up, his thumb against his two middle fingers and the index and little finger suck out. I guess that meant something that I was supposed to recognize. Andy said, "But it depends on who they sign this year. I don't want to be a backup for three years."
I hadn't known about that world, even my father wasn't that much of a sports fan.
He said, "My sister is pissed as hell, of course. She has a ton of basketball scholarship offers too, but thinks some of them are just to get me interested. Her scouting grades aren't as high as mine. Now she will only look at the schools that don't have good football programs, and that leaves out the last two women's champs."
"I didn't know she was that good either. You two must have picked some really good genes, huh. Not just height ones."
"And an asshole father too. I think we started training before I started school. We are his dream, Jord. Maybe if Cindy hadn't been so good, I wouldn't have worked so hard, and vice versa, and we could have been a family rather than a training camp."
My legs were still in Andy's lap, and his hand had just wandered up past my knee. I pushed it back down and said, "It's just my calf that's sore, Andy," but I leaned into his chest again almost getting into his lap. Andy's wasn't such a great life after all.
"But, Jord, I've seen guys that are lots, lots worse off. I actually do like my father and, if I get injured or wash out as a player, I'll still get to come home for thanksgiving dinner. I know people who probably wouldn't."
I stroked Andy's hand which was on my thigh again. He said, "Do you like boys more when you are dressed like that, Jord. I really could get used to it if you do. Do come to the practice in drag, then I could show you off. And you won't get made by the jocks. I promise, not with that hair. Most wouldn't know you from Adam without your baseball cap."
I shoved his hand away and sat up, but I couldn't help smiling.
A loud voice said, "Lookie here! To what do we owe the honor of your presence on our side of town, Chekhov?"
Three giants, two much bigger than Andy, had come in. They were wearing Ferral High t-shirts, orange and black, with the sleeves cut off.
"Hey, Jojo, just getting lunch," Andy said.
"Heard you'll had some excitement last night. Gonna be a hard week for Northfud, losing the MacGuffin and the biggest game of the year."
Andy said, "Would be --- if that could happen." Both of them were smiling so far.
I said, "How did you know about the MacGuffin? They kept it out of the papers."
The Ferral player looked at me for the first time, and said, "I heard. I was doing some work for Red. He told me all about it." He sat down in our booth.
Andy put his arm around my shoulder again; I put both my hands on top of his and held his fingers. I didn't care for our visitor.
"So really, Andy, how you'll think you're gonna do?"
Andy said, "I think were going to do real well in a real good game, Jojo. You don't think I'm going to say something you can tack to your bulletin board, do you? Or do you want to hear our game plan?"
"Nah. We don't need it."
The two bigger goons had pulled chairs over to sit near our booth. One of them said, "Boy, Chekhov, she's even smaller than Tracy. You sure like them tiny don't you. Can't you handle a full sized woman?"
Andy just starred at him. His arm got a little tighter against my shoulder.
The biggest giant said, "Yeah, you must do it dog style, or you would squash her."
I felt myself blush; I really, really didn't want to.
Andy said, "Shut up, Pike! This isn't one of your Ferral girls. Show some class."
"Ohhh," all three of them said.
The mid-sized oaf said, "Maybe Andy just likes mouth jobs. But I don't think her mouth could even hold mine. I'd choke her."
The biggest one, Pike, said, "Andy must be really tiny where it matters. Huh, Chekhov?"
Andy slowly said, "I asked you to shut up in front of Hailey." He sat up very straight and stiff; I held his hand tightly to keep him from standing up.
Maggie came over and said, "I've had enough of this crud. Jojo. Get them out of my place. You're malts are on the counter. Drink them somewhere else and don't any of you come back here anytime soon."
After they picked up their drinks, the midsized goon said, "Maybe we will let you have the MacGuffin back after we cream your asses Friday."
Maggie said, "Your lunches are on the house, Andy. I'm sorry about that. They aren't bad boys, just assholes. But, Andy, stay away from here until after the game, OK?"
Andy said, "I will, and it's not your fault. We will pay for lunch."
Maggie refused the money, but Andy said, "If I take a free pen, my father blows a gasket, Maggie. He thinks the NCAA has spies watching, just trying to trap me in an infraction."
"Hell they might," she said and took the money, but she made us wait until the others had time to get far away before she would let us go.
Andy began eating everything I'd left on my plate that wasn't green. He told me that those three jerks were defensive players for the Wildcats, and that they had only been trying to make him get angry enough to play mad on Friday night. He said they were actually his friends most weeks, but I didn't buy that.
Jojo's a linebacker, one of Ferral's best players. The biggest one, Pike, is a defensive tackle, just a wall and not a very good one. The third one's named Hancock, a defensive end and fast for his size. Andy thought that if the Wildcats ever sacked him, that would be the guy that did it.
Blair's phone rang, and said the call was from 'home'.
"Blair! Where have you been?" I said.
"At home, sleeping. I just got up," she said.
"Blair, what happened? What are we going to do?"
"I'm going to meet Tracy and go to the mall. Then she wants to watch the scrimmage tonight. What are you doing? When can I get may phone back. And why did you take it, Jordan."
"Tracy brought it over to me last night. Remember? I didn't mean to, Blair. What happened with the cops?"
"They pounded on the door real early and then took me downtown. They asked me all about that white jacket, but I told them I had lost it. They made my mother look all over for it, and were going through all my stuff. Finally she said she wasn't doing any more until they got a warrant, and that was when they took me in.
"It wasn't a big deal though. We just sat in a room for about two hours; they asked me about thirty times what I'd done last night and made me look through a year book and point out everyone that was there last night. They wanted to know who was wearing a baseball cap, and I named about four boys. Then that lieutenant came in and said I could go. I came home and went back to bed. Hell if I know what is up, Jordan. I don't think any of them have a clue either. Now, when can I get my phone?"
"They've decided it was an inside job. But, Blair, they still think we helped with it. I think some of the Ferral kids must have been in on it. We need to nail Kipperman somehow. And fast. How can you just be going to hang at the mall, Blair? And one cop said you were under house arrest or something too."
"They didn't tell me or my mom about it, if I am. Anyway, they can't do that. That would take a judge, right?"
"Yeah, but isn't your mother steamed?"
"Only with the cops. And with your father. And about me not having my phone."
"Well, he can't really get into it; you know that, Blair. Don't you? We have to talk to this guy, Kipperman."
"Don't worry about it, Jordan. It will work out. I got to go, Tracy is on her way to pick me up. The phone, Jordan?"
"Andy and I are going to leave the bikes at the garage for awhile. I'll leave the phone there too. OK? We need to get to this Kipperman, Blair!"
"Good. Just calm down about Kipperman, already. He has a truck at the garage and is going to pick it up at closing time. Five-thirty. Tracy and I are going to talk to him then. If you really want to, you can watch, I guess."
Watch?!! "I want to do a lot more than watch. Of course I'll be there."
"OK, guess I'll see then. Bye."
Blair was still pissed at me. I still didn't know why. I closed the phone and sighed. Andy put his hand on my shoulder and said, "What's up?"
I just shook my head and said, "They've set up a meeting with Kipperman for five. At least they have gotten something done today."
"So have you, Jord. You got the bikes. Found out it was an inside job."
"I think those three 'friends' of yours know something, Andy."
"Could be. Kipperman might have used them for stooges. They fit the part. They should be gone by now; let's go."
Andy put his hand on my shoulder as we left the restaurant. That would look right, so I let him.
The three Ferral oafs hadn't left, however. They had cut the ropes on Andy's trunk and the biggest one was on my sister's bicycle, riding in circles around the parking lot. He was so big he made the tires look flat.
"Get the fuck off that!" I yelled. Andy clutched my shoulder, and I shook his hand off.
"Or what?" the fat boy said.
I grabbed the handle bars and said, "Off! Before you crush it, jerk."
"Hailey, wait!" Andy screamed.
"Fuck you!" the guy on the bike yelled. He put his foot out and pushed me away with it.
I didn't need this. Not today. Not right then.
I took a step back, jumped, and did a crane kick right into his giant gut.
He groaned and let the bike fall. He lunged for me, and I tried to knock his foot out from under him. All I managed to do was kick his shin as I slipped past him.
He turned around and took a swing at me. I love it when people throw punches like they are throwing baseballs. As the fist went over my head, my leg was in front of the knee holding all his weight, and I pushed on his back. He fell fast and hard, and didn't know how to do that. When he got up, his hands were bloody where the asphalt and gravel had bit into them.
I sensed the second guy, the end, behind me. I turned, and he had both arms out trying to get me in a bear hug. I ducked, but he was faster than I'd expected, and he caught my head in a half nelson.
Andy ran over and knocked him off me.
Jojo yelled, "Stop! It was just a damn joke!"
"And so was steeling the MacGuffin, huh?" I yelled.
The largest Ferral boy charged Andy with his arms wrapped across his chest. He pushed with his forearms just as he reached Andy, and Andy was knocked to the ground on his back.
Jojo hollered, "Hancock, Pike. Back off!"
I did a flying leap and both my feet landed on Pike's back, somewhere near his kidneys. He fell, but he fell on top of Andy.
The other one came over, and I hit him with a round house kick to the stomach, but it didn't knock the breath out of him some how.
I had never done this stuff for real before, or this hard. I didn't really want to seriously injure them, and that thought distracted me. Jojo came up behind me, took a kick to his ribs but grabbed my foot and threw me over.
The fat guy was kneeling over Andy and pulled his arm back to slug Andy in the face while he was down. Jojo grabbed his arm and said, "Get in the damn truck, Pike."
Pike said, "The hell!" and swung his foot at Andy's stomach. Andy pulled his leg up and took the kick with his thigh. I ran over and gave Pike a two handed jab between his shoulder blades.
He screamed and swung both arms around. He almost hit me, but I jumped back -- and landed in Jojo's grasp.
Pike growled. He yelled, "Fucking assholes!" He raised his leg high and brought it down hard onto Andy's right hand.
I swear I heard the bones smash.
Jojo threw me to the ground and yelled, "In the damn truck, Fuckups! Run!"
Pike and the other lineman climbed into the bed of a red pickup with oversized wheels. Jojo got in the front and peeled out of the parking lot. As the tires screeched through the turn onto the street, Pike yelled, "The MacGuffin. Your star quarterback The district championship. There ain't nothing you Northfucks have we can't take!"
I ran and sat beside Andy. I took his head into my lap and stroked his cheek. He must have been in shock; he was laughing. His hand was a mangled black, blue and red mass.
With one ally down, Jordan must continue the search for clues alone.
Is Jordan getting closer to the MacGuffin, or is trouble closing in on Jordan?
Posted only through the efforts of my friends and beta readers, Daphne and Kristina, and because of the good well of readers like you. Many, many thanks to all of you!
8: Reset
Like a matador following the death of the bull, I stood, alone, on the blood stained gravel. The sunlight poured down on me; the smell of destruction was in my nostrils. The silent, gaping crowd that had come from the diner at the end of the fight surrounded me, and I watched the lights of the car taking Andy's mangled body to the hospital recede into the distance.
The waitress approached me and said, "Are you OK, honey? Are you hurt anywhere?"
I had to examine my own arms and hands -- consciously inventory my body -- to be sure that I was unhurt. I had no bruises or cuts. That seemed an injustice. I don't know if that was because I felt I deserved some, or because it was so unfair that only Andy was to suffer.
I shook my head, and Maggie put her arms around me and pulled the rip in the side of my top closed. "That'd get real embarrassing if you had gone to the hospital, hon." she said.
"Ohhh, did those assholes see it?" I whispered to her, and I tried to hold the seam shut. The rip was huge.
Maggie laughed. "Nope. They would have said something, and it would have been real loud. You were just moving way too fast, honey. Come on; you get cleaned up, and I'll have my brother bring some of his daughter's clothes over and then give you a ride home."
There were lockers for the waitresses in a room behind the ladies', and she left me with some cotton balls and makeup remover. Standing beside the door, she said, "I'm real happy that Andy has found someone like you, hon."
"We're just friends; he is serious about Tracy."
"Sure, sure, I'll remember that if that's how you want it."
I got the makeup off. My face had been a total mess but, when I started to redo it, I had to stop and sit down first, and think.
Andy's whole career was ruined. I knew it. How could someone throw a football ever again once their hand had been crushed?
All I knew about the MacGuffin was that it was missing. At least now I knew those Ferral creeps were in on it with Kipperman. But I didn't know how I was going to get any information from them.
Blair was free, but was still under suspicion. So was I. They had my description; knew about my hats, someone would eventually tell the cops I often wore red caps; they would have my name soon if they didn't already.
And I didn't know what step to take next.
Maggie came back in carrying a stack of clothes. She put them on the bench, sat down and put her arms around me.
"It's OK, hon," she said. "That was scary. Let it out."
"No," I said shaking my head. That wasn't what I needed to do at all.
I asked her what would happen to Andy now that he could never play football again, and she said, "We don't know for sure, Hon, but he sure might play real soon. Just don't worry 'bout it, and we'll all see. That's all we can do. Things like that always look horrible at first, and he is a tough and strong boy."
She told me that he broke a wrist last year and finished the game. I couldn't believe that, and this had to be different, worse, anyway.
I mentioned the MacGuffin, and she had heard about it last night from the late crowd. I told her the cops suspected a girl and a boy I knew of being involved, and that the Ferral players talked like they knew something, and that I need to find out what the cops thought now.
She said that her brother might be able to tell me something. And then we looked through the clothes he had brought.
Maggie's brother must have grabbed everything in two or three drawers or something, but her niece was even shorter than me. The shorts and jeans wouldn't work at all. I had on a pair of my sister's old panties that held things pretty well, but anything tighter than what I had on would have shown things I didn't want showing.
I looked through the tops. Most were chemises or tees that would be very tight, so I picked up a swing dress.
Maggie said. "That isn't going to fit you. Try on these shorts."
"I was going to wear it just as a top, and keep my jeans on. I think that would work."
"You should see the back of your pants, hon. They're filthy with oil and grease all over."
I looked at my back in the mirror and she was right; I couldn't wear these jeans. But I also couldn't wear any of her niece's shorts.
There was really only one option: a twirl skirt, teal with plaid trim. It must have been long on Maggie's niece, but would still be short on me. And it isn't like I had the hips to make me want to push it down very far.
There was one shirred square-necked top that flared and wouldn't be too tight. It was bright yellow with a thin green ivy print, but it would have to do. The print was light enough not to clash with the teal too badly.
Maggie didn't look like she would leave while I changed, but I faced the corner and, except for my undersized backside, I don't think she saw anything unusual about me.
The top reached my navel - if I kept my arms straight down. There were about three inches between its bottom and the skirt's top even then. I looked in the mirror and moved my hands over the place where some curves should have been. This was worse than the outfit I'd worn last night, and much worse than the embroidered jeans and a pink top that had reached my waist.
Maggie said, "OK. stop admiring your skinny body, and get busy. Your legs could use a shave, but they are very pretty. You should take care of them and show them off more."
I smiled because I knew she expected me to. "I don't think about it at the right times." My legs did have some stubble, but I had shaved them at camp too, and what little hair I had was light anyway. "Do they look that bad?"
"I've seen much worse around this place, but it'd sure make you feel better, hon." she said.
She looked through several lockers and turned around with a bottle of Nair. "Put this on your legs while you do your makeup. That should be long enough. Use those kitchen rags over there to wipe it off. Doesn't look like you need to go much past your knees.
"I got to get out front. Lloyd will be getting all antsy, and the cook and the girls will be getting POed. This is my place, but that just means I get the worst hours and have more bosses than anyone else. I'll talk to Lloyd about the MacGuffin while you finish up."
She didn't give me a chance to object, and I worried that if I went into the diner without using the goo, she might ask me about it in front of the whole room.
I could say I had been on a swim team, but that would be a lie, something I didn't like to do. I could start running in sweat pants all the time. And Andy was right, if anyone on the cross country team did notice my legs, they would never admit it. Also, a girl with hairy legs got more looks than a boy without any anyway. No one really looked at boys, at least not short geeky ones.
When I walked back into the cafe, there were more customers than before, and Maggie was waiting on a table. There was a policeman in the booth near the back cursing at his laptop, and he looked up and said, "There you are. About time, and I thought I told you to keep Andy out of trouble last night."
It took me a second to recognize him, but it was Officer Benwell who had help us with Andy. I said hello, and asked if he was Maggie's brother. He said he was and told me to sit down.
Maggie was going towards the kitchen and said, "Don't give her a hard time, Lloyd. She tried to protect Andy. You should have seen her fighting off that pack of goons."
I said, "Thank you for the clothes."
"Sure thing. Hailey, right? Maggie told me about those Ferral boys but if Andy won't press charges, there ain't much I can do. Officially."
He said that in a way that made it clear there were some unofficial things that might be done.
"Is that a Makina?" I asked, looking at the computer that was giving him trouble
"Yeah, piece of junk if you ask me. You know about computers?"
"A little," I said.
I wasn't one of the top techies at my school, but sometimes I could understand what they were talking about. Makina was a new company, and their computers ran a new platform called the DayOS-X. It was sometimes quirky, but sometimes it would deliver fantastic results. A DayOS-X Makina had been high on my birthday wish list, but a phone was good too, and I had no hopes of getting both.
The cop said, "Well, the town's givin' us all one of these things to use in the cruisers. Maggie said you were worried about what was goin' on with the MacGuffin, and I've been off so I haven't heard the news, but it might be in here somewhere, and I can't get the darn thing to work. Want to try?"
"Sure," I said. Something told me there was probably a regulation somewhere against me using the cop database. But when I asked the officer to type in the password, he asked me today's date and he told me the password. Then he added, 'I guess I can tell you. It changes every day and you would have to have one of our computers anyway."
It was today's date, month - day - year, with seven added to each part, and the zip code for the town center typed with the shift key held down.
I opened the local network and did a search for the MacGuffin. I got to the report but acted like I was still searching while I read it. All the phone lines from the clubhouse went dead at six forty-three, before Blair and I had reached the park. That had killed all the silent alarms, but after fifteen minutes without service a policeman had been sent to check on the wires, and he had met Kipperman and noticed the broken window
This morning glass from the window was found inside the MacGuffin's case. So the police knew that someone on the inside was involved, and the window was broken after the MacGuffin was taken. In spite of that, they still thought high school students had been involved. Blair was under suspicion because she was known to own, and wear, a white sports coat (the only one in town??). That had been reported by an anonymous informant identified only as a friend from Northfield High School.
They were still looking for the boy she had lent it to and, also, a boy that wore black shirts and a red baseball cap, me. Blair was restricted to her house and school, even if she didn't know it, and was supposed to be "observed and companions noted" by all officers. That was strange: was she under house arrest or to be watched?
Mr Benwell took the computer. He had just told me that the police still thought students were involved when Maggie came over and sat with us while she waited for an order from the kitchen.
She said, "Lloyd, you found out where Hailey lives yet?"
"Oh," I said, "I not going home. I'm supposed to be meeting my mother right now. Could you give me a ride to the town center instead? It's closer than my house anyway."
Maggie was surprised. "You're meeting you mom!? Right now?"
"Yeah, I'd like to go home, I guess, but we already had plans."
"You must have a great mom," she said. "What are you'll planning this afternoon?"
It was strange having a stranger so interested and worried about me, but nice. I couldn't help smiling. "It's my birthday next week, and she's finally going to get me a phone. Then she's going to drop me off to get my ears pierced today too."
Maggie wanted all the details, and we talked about it until Lloyd said he had to go.
It was well after two when I got to the Starbuck's to meet Mom. She was sitting on a bench along the back wall, and ordinarily she would have just started to steam, but when she saw me her eyes and mouth flew open.
She was the first person who really let me talk about Andy and his hand. I had finished telling her of it before she did anything but stare at me. Then she wrapped me in a hug, something we didn't usually do in public.
Once we were in the car, however, she started the interrogation about my clothes. I had to explain about borrowing them. I explained about getting the breast forms on line and why my legs were hairless. I had to explain about learning to do makeup while working on the school play and listen while she gave me advice that I'll probably never need again. She didn't make any responses really; she only found new lines of inquiry within each of my explanations.
When we were walking to the mall from the car, she took my hand and, as we walked through the door, she said, "That's the first time we have held hands in over four years, and for two years before that you always looked like mine was covered in slime when we did."
I leaned into her side. I started to try to explain about that, but she interrupted and said, "I know, Jor. It wasn't me. It was what you thought other people would think."
She didn't seem to be in a horrible mood at all, just sort of confused, so I said, "Mom, do you think we could look for a bag while I'm here. Something I could use at school -- on normal days -- too."
"You got a new back pack in April. You can still use that, I'm sure, but we'll get you a purse, and you can give me the gift card Sammie will send you next week."
I grimaced. Sammie, a.k.a. Samantha Hailey, is my big sister, the smart one in my family, currently a brand new freshman at an east coast university (the kind that doesn't recruit people like Andy), and the pride and joy of both my parents. However, if any of the stories I've heard are half true, she isn't half as bad as big sisters can be. I didn't want to surrender her whole present for one dumb bag.
There was also something else, and this seemed like a good time to bring it up too. "Uh -- I sort of lost my shoes. See -- they got wet -- Andy was using this squirt gun. And I took them off, and when I went back they weren't where I took them off. I was planning to use Sammie's gift card for some new ones." Well, no clause in that was untrue.
She said, "New tennis shoes will take your grandmother's gift card, Jordan."
"Na-uh, only half!" It was my sixteenth birthday; I had big expectations.
Mom laughed at me. "Alright, we will get you some sort of messenger bag and new shoes in exchange for the card from Grandmom, and you can keep the one from Sammie."
This time I gave her a hug. Then I said, "Grandmom's gift card will be even bigger than that, won't it? And we're still going to go get my ears pierced though, right?"
She chuckled, a good sign. "Yes, yes, I promised, and I guess we will work out payment after you get the cards, and your other relatives will probably give you gift cards, Jordan; everyone knows the one thing you ever want.
"Uncle Greg and Aunt Diane will send me two too, right?" That was an old family joke. My Mom's twin brother married my father's cousin, Diane, after they met at my parent's wedding. They always sent my sister and me two sets of presents, since they were related in two ways. Though I knew now they were the same amount as one would have been, it was a big deal when Sammie and I were kids.
First I got my new Phone. It was a refurb, but with a qwerty keyboard and camera, and it could do videos. It's white - though the guy tried to force me to get pink or teal.
I got some shoes from Lady Foot Locker that were silver-grey with royal blue soles and trim. They would work when I wasn't in costume too.
Mom became quieter and quieter as we walked through the mall. But she still wasn't angry, not huffing, nor sighing, nor biting her lip. She was just very disquietingly pensive, and she kept holding my hand most of the time.
I found a light blue bag with red leather-like trim and lots of pockets at Macy's. It looked like a small camera bag so I could use it for school and not draw too much crap. (Even using the wrong pen draws some.)
While I was looking at the bags, there were two boys pretending to look at belts but who were really watching me. I had seen them standing outside the shoe store too.
My mother told me to stop tugging at my shirt, because I kept trying to stretch it out, make it longer, so I asked her if I could buy a new top.
That was when she did bite her lip. Then she sighed that way only she ever does, and that she only ever does when talking to me. "No! No! Shoes and purses are all I can handle," she said.
"You're totally freaked, huh?"
She nodded, then shrugged her shoulders.
It wasn't until the car was out of the parking lot that either of us said anything else, and then she said, "Jordan, I know that it is just because you want to be in disguise today, and because you didn't have many choices after that fight, but I don't ever want to see you in clothes like that again.
"The next time your skirt had better be at least three inches longer than that one. I would have grounded your sister for wearing something like that."
I laughed hard and said, "Mom, I'm only doing this to find out things about last night and to help Blair. And that's why I wanted to get something else."
"You said a top. It's the skirt that's almost indecent."
I looked at my legs; she wasn't totally wrong. "Those two boys kept staring at me, Mom! I don't exactly have a shape to show off in a crop top. I think they knew I wasn't a girl."
Now she laughed. "That's what worried you? Jor-Jor, most girls don't have Barbie's curves. Lot's of girls as skinny as you are would show off their stomachs, love. And if I were a boy I'd have stared too."
"Really?"
"Yeah, really. You aren't going to get many modeling jobs but, if that isn't your goal, you look fine."
"My only goal is to help Blair, Mom."
She did her patented sigh thing again. "Jordan, I know. You've told me that. And I know that is the reason you are out and about like this, but I don't know how you feel about it, and I don't think you would tell me if you could."
"I'm just doing it for Blair. Really, truly, honest. I'm not lying."
"I know that, puppy. I do. I know you don't out and out lie, or at least only very, very rarely and never without feeling real, real guilty about it later. You do, however, obfuscate and equivocate. And, let's see, you deliberately mislead people; you change the subject without telling anyone. You might leave out important elements, and then you don't bother to correct the misconceptions you've created. . ."
"OK. I get the idea. You know, both my parents are lawyers."
"No. They don't teach those skills in law school. Law schools teach you how to write agreements and ask questions that make it hard to do things like that. Then, after law school, some lawyers become experts at circumventing other people's language. But they don't require the avoidance skills on the exams.
"Jor, I think equivocating is something teenagers develop naturally, but you have a special talent for it. And that is why I'm not going to ask you about it at all. Talk to me when you want to, if you ever do."
"I really am only doing this today for Blair and to get the MacGuffin back."
"Just stop, sweetie. Don't explain anymore."
So no matter what I said, she wasn't going to believe that I didn't wear girl's clothes all the time, and nothing was going to convince her I didn't like doing it.
We had to park about two blocks from Hotz'n, the store where I was going to get my ears pierced. I changed into my new shoes and plugged my new phone in to charge before I got out.
Mom held my hand again as we walked up the street; I was getting used to that. But then she huffed loudly and said, "If this store has them, I want you to buy some capris or bike shorts to wear under that skirt. Something long enough to make it clear you don't think wearing that is being dressed."
"OK." I kind of moaned. "I don't think they have anything here, but I'll probably go to the mall for dinner with Blair and Tracy. Can I get a new top too? Do I have to pay for them with my money?"
She chuckled rather than sighed; that was a good sign. "You really have me between a rock and another rock, don't you? If I pay for them, I'm enabling something I don't want to, but I don't like to make you pay for something you will say you won't use again. And stop worrying about your navel and worry about your crotch, boy. -- Ugh, I hope no one heard me say that."
There was almost no one on the street, so I giggled at that a little. I took her to mean she would pay for the new things and leaned my head onto her arm. "It's just because of the MacGuffin and Andy and Blair, Mom."
"Just shut up, Jordan. I don't want to hear all that again."
She warned me that my father would be home this afternoon, but told me that they were going out about seven. I knew she meant I shouldn't come home before then; I was stuck in these clothes at least that long. But she agreed to unlock my window if she and dad got home tonight before I did. Mom even said I could use my emergency credit card for dinner and anything I needed tonight.
She was being really compliant, but I wasn't sure if that was because she was worried, or just liked me dressed like this, or was being nice in the way the guards on death row are nice to the condemned.
The store was dimly lit, most of the light coming from spot lights on the displays. The only clerk had on lots of black eye shadow, half inch silver buttons and two other studs in each ear, very bright red lips and finger nails, and wore a solid black plain tee shirt but with the collar pulled down to mid-chest and held in place with a gaudy rhinestone broach.
Blair had told me they carry gaffs and things for cross dressers here, but I had always known of it as a t-shirt/goth-wannabe/costume shop. The things Blair was talking about must be kept in a back room or something.
While she filled out the permission papers for the piercings, I walked around and looked for something to hide my bleached hair since the cops were looking for a boy with white hair now. Also, it would be good to find a way to make Hailey Jordan look different from Jordan Hailey if I was going to have to appear as a girl a lot. That meant I needed temporary dyes. The spray on colors are awful, they come off on clothes and everything else and don't last long enough to even trick-or-treat, but rinses wouldn't have enough color, so I picked up a can of the yellow spray on stuff.
As I looked at the costume thing, thought about the police report and how it didn't name the person who reported that Blair wore a white jacket last night. And the person who reported that hadn't given my name as the boy with white hair. That was an important clue. Who had recognized Blair and not known me? Kipperman had not said anything at all about the white hair.
Also why were the police supposed to observe Blair and her associates, if she was under house arrest? It was just screwy.
I should have looked deeper when I had the Makina open. Another mistake.
Mom wanted to wait for me, but I knew I was going to take a lot longer than she expected and that she still had to go back to her office, so I assured her I'd be fine. There is a free shopper's shuttle that would take me almost right to Tracy's.
I got into the barber chair that was used for piercing. The clerk put the keepers in both ears before saying a word to me, and then said, "Here's what we have for the trainers for bellybuttons. Can't do keepers there. So you're stuck with one of these things for six weeks."
I said, "Huh. I'm not getting that done too."
"Your mother checked the box for it on the form. I didn't even ask her first. You want it done?"
I guess Mom was telling me my stomach, and my dressing, was OK. I picked a red glass bead for my navel, and I got some silver disks and some pink and blue zirconium flowers with dangling green beads for my lobes.
While I was leaning back to get the navel done, the clerk said, "You mother is pretty neat, huh?"
"Yeah, sometimes, whatever."
"Mine wouldn't let me go out like that at all."
I explained the clothing emergency, and the clerk laughed.
"Not just that! My mother sees me in a sarong and goes totally ape. Look, there are things I notice that most people wouldn't, you know. You're good, but I did get suspicious. I guess tilting this chair back is unfair; I'm not a lecher but I had to check.
And, well, I didn't mention it to embarrass you, you know? It's just that - well I don't try to pass all the time - but you might not want to bring it up, and maybe I could sometimes - help you or something."
I almost swallowed my tongue, but it wasn't a disaster with this person. I said, "Yeah, well, like I said, I didn't have much choice today. Are you Terry?"
"No, he's at lunch. Everyone calls me Quinn or just "Q", and I already know you're Jordan, right? Is that the name you like to go by?"
It's OK, or Hailey. Whichever you like."
"So how long have you been dressing?"
"Huh? Oh, like a girl. Umm, I've done cross dress days at camp and went to an anime thing once, you know, like that."
"Come on! What else? You don't have to pass for those things, and I don't care how fem you are usually, you've had practice."
"Last year I went Christmas shopping with my sister, wearing her stuff."
"OK. All right. Did she blackmail ya'? Or just threaten to beat you up? Or what?"
I chuckled. "No. Nothing like that. We just thought it would be some Lolz."
"Good. No excuses. Who told you to talk to Terry, Hailey?"
"Do you know a girl named Blair?"
"I know a few Blairs."
"Blair Lu."
"Lou Blair. Yeah, I know him."
My eye brows must have shot up. The clerk said, "Him. Her. Around here pronouns get problematic."
"'K. She told me to talk to Terry about some things I could use sometimes. What pronouns do you like people to use for you, Q?"
"Me? Don't care. It's fun to see what people pick, and to watch the ones that have trouble. If you ever meet Terry though, use male ones. He thinks it's a big compliment when people do.
"You can talk to me about those things you need if you want. You shaved down there?"
I shook my head, and he said, "Well you're gonna have to someday. I'm going to give you some of these new patches. It's a two part system. They're great, because you just slap them down, and they grab things. And you can pull off the top part if things get hard. You can't go naked, but short of that they are the best. And I'll get a gaff for now. Do you know how to use them?"
I had read some instructions on line and had a pretty good idea. It didn't seem difficult.
When I got back from the dressing room, I had to lift the skirt up, and Q said, "OK, you got that right. But I'm not selling you that spray on hair crap. Really, there's this new, fantastic stuff. And I'm not just being a salesman. 'Cause, look at me! I'd suck at it. But if it wasn't real, and showed up in a story, you would say it was proof of the existence of an author."
The hair dye was called Dev-Ice and was made by a theatrical make up company, PlaHot. It was just what I needed. It works even on black hair. It doesn't come off even when wet but, when washed with a special shampoo, it disappears completely.
Q showed me how to apply it. It combed into the hair with a special brush. We did my whole head; I left the store with my white hair hidden under pink and blue neon streaks. I got six shades of the stuff and three bottles of the remover. It all fit into my new bag, but it all weighed half a ton.
I also had a blue French manicure on half inch nails that I could peel off and reused, a new ring with two little silver bells on it, a set of pink and a set of red nails like the ones I was wearing, a bracelet that looked like a tiny silver and green ivy vine on my ankle, and some new sunglasses with red lens that could be taken out and replaced with green, blue, or clear ones.
I also bought a new t-shirt, for boy mode, because Quinn had rung up some of the other purchases as shirts, and my father might ask to see them. I had used up all my birthday cash and was going to need a giant finder's fee for this case. And I was going to need it before the credit card bill reached my house.
It was a three block walk to the bus stop for the Shopper's Shuttle. As soon as I left the shop, this boy on a bicycle, about fourteen or so, started following me. After riding by and coming back a few times, he found the guts to offer to carry my bag and even offered me a ride on his handle bars.
It was flattering - he sure hadn't read me - and funny - at first.
"I'm Bobby. Where you going?" he asked.
"Just to see a friend."
"So you gonna be a freshman at Northfield?"
I laughed and said, "Why doesn't anyone ever think of Southlake?"
"Cuz they suck."
I just kept walking, so he said, "No. It's 'K, just lots of nerds there though."
Southlake High was right next to the University campus. I don't know if that just caused their reputation or really did affect their students.
"Yep, that's me. Huge nerd."
"I haven't seen many nerds as cute as you."
I rolled my eyes. "So what sports do you play?"
"Why do you think I'm a jock?"
"Because you're trying to pick me up while I'm just walking along minding my own business."
"Yeah, OK. I play football, but I'm only on the Junior Varsity though. We've got lots of linebackers this year, so I have to wait to be an upper classman, even though I'm better."
"Uh-uh."
"So you hate jocks, huh."
"No! Some are really nice. Lots are real assholes that always hit on strange girls though."
"I'm not. It's just this is a bad area. I thought you would want some company, is all."
"OK, well here's my bus stop. See you."
"I can wait for your bus with you. Look, my brother is around here with his car, want me to call him and get you a ride."
"No. I'll be just fine, thank you."
"I'll wait with you. It's a public bus stop, so I can stay. Look there he is. You want to come for a ride?"
There was a dirty burgundy Subaru driving slowly up the street with two older boys in it. Bobby waved to them.
"I don't think so." At least the car kept moving, but I was getting worried. The car being there right then was too much of a coincidence.
"Well, do you want to go to movie or get a burger sometime? What's your number? I'll call you sometime." Bobby wasn't going to give up; typical jock jerk.
"You would have to meet my father first. And, believe me he wouldn't be happy about it."
"Yuck. Is he really that strict? He's gotta meet everyone you go get a burger with."
"No, that's a special rule I made just for you."
"Ohh - you are so cruel. I'm really really nice. Really."
The Subaru was coming up the street again, and this time it pulled over to the curb. Bobby rolled his bike towards it and the boys in it opened their doors. The boy's looked familiar, but I couldn't place them.
I saw a bus on the other side of the street. The shuttle made a loop of the shopping district, and that one would take almost twice as long to get to Tracy's garage, but I ran across the middle of the street to catch it.
I almost fell into a seat at the front of the bus. I needed to get some new clothes soon! Even if that did mean my mother was right. And there was an Old Navy right on the bus route, but I also knew that Blair was going to be getting steamed as hell about her phone.
Her phone! I was so use to always being out of touch I had forgotten that I could call her. I didn't want to invade her privacy and look though her directory though, so I took a chance and hit the 'T' key.
"Is this Chuck?" the voice, that did sound like Tracy, said.
"Tracy? No -- do I have the right number?"
I heard what could only be Tracy's giggle on the phone. "Yes, Jordie, it's me. We heard about your Chuck Norris routine. The whole Ferral team at one time, huh?"
"It wasn't like that, Tracy. How did you hear about it? Is Blair there?" I needed to talk to someone sane.
"Yeah, and Andy has called about twelve times looking for you. He wants to be sure we get you to the scrimmage tonight. Jorie, I think it's love."
"Isn't he in the hospital? Just let me talk to Blair."
"Na-uh. They let him go, and he really wants to see you tonight. Uh - Blair doesn't want to talk to you, Jor. She wants her phone though. Where are you?"
"I'm on the bus on my way there. What is she so pissed about?"
"Well you running off with her phone, and we saw you and your mom at the mall and, I guess, she thought you should have brought it to her before you went out shopping, and strutting your stuff in those clothes, guy. Anyway she didn't want to talk to you there, just got weird about it. I thought you looked hot as heck, Jor. Are you still dressed like that, babe?"
Sigh "I'll be at your garage in about twenty minutes. Is that where you are? We're still talking to Kipperman when he comes to get his truck, right?"
"Yeah, I'm here. I have to wait 'til the office closes, so all the men can watch some pre-season football game but, Jor, Kipperman doesn't come to get his own trucks. He'll send some worker to get it."
shit - shit - shit
Just then two girls moved up from the back of the bus and sat right behind me. It was Lori Peters and Sydney Greenway, the two girls we had run into at the park last night. Things just kept going downhill faster and faster.
"Shiii - Well," I said into the phone, "I'll see you in a few."
"OK, wait" Tracy said, "You should call Andy, and tell him what you're doing. He won't be at practice yet."
I could hear her talking to Blair, then she said, "Andy is pound sign 2 on Blair's phone. Call him; don't break his heart, Jor."
"OK," I whisered, "I have some idiots listening right now though. Bye."
Before I'd pushed the button to end the call, Sydney said, "You're that girl that was with Blair last night, huh?"
I didn't answer and, unperturbed, she took that as an admission. "It's OK with us if you're like that. We were just saying is all."
I still said nothing.
Lori said, "I guess, you know the school didn't get blown up by now, huh?" then she snickered about it.
"Yeah, never really thought it had. You heard any more rumors yet?"
She snickered. "We knew last night. Someone took the MacGuffin."
Sydney said, "Guess everyone knows by now. So we can tell you."
I think Lori was still wearing the same clothes she had on last night. Sydney had at least changed her shirt, and now had on a tight fitting black knit one that reminded me that I left my shirt in Andy's car.
"Oh. Where did you hear that one?"
Lori snickered some more. "Oh, we know it."
"We've got inside information," Sydney said with some kind of a smirk on her face.
"OK, whatever." Like I was going to believe anything they had to say. "I need to call someone. Guess I'll see you around."
I started to move to the back, but Lori snickered again and said, "You know you look like a boy I know. Are you related to someone named Jordan?"
"I've got a cousin named Jordan." I did, several as a matter of fact, but it was their last names. "
"This guy goes to Northfield and he's a real super nerd, honor society and all that. Last name is Hailey."
I shrugged my shoulders and said, "Maybe that's my cousin. I need to make this call; I'll go to the back of the bus."
Sydney decided to be polite, since I was obviously trying to get rid of them. She told me their names and asked mine.
I said, "Hailey."
Snicker. "That nerd guy's?"
"Yeah, Jordan's mother's brother married Jordan's father's cousin. Means I have lots of double relatives. My mother gave me her maiden name as a first name. Jordan's mother gave Jordan her maiden name. She knew what she was doing but did it anyway."
Sydney said, "Oh, so Hailey Jordan, and he's Jordan Hailey. Weird."
"Yeah, it's not a problem; we aren't ever seen together."
Blair's phone rang, and it wasn't playing "I Kissed a Girl," so the call wasn't from Tracy. I wasn't going to answer but I had to look at it since Lori and Sydney heard it. The phone said it was Andy, and I got up and walked away.
"Andy! Are you OK?"
"Yeah, fine. No thanks to you, Sensei Jordan."
"Huh. What? Huh?"
Andy was laughing. "Just kidding, Hailey. Are you going to come and watch me tonight? Tracy told me about your new clothes. I can't wait to see them."
"Andy! Why aren't you in the hospital? You can't play tonight. Come on, be real."
"No, I just broke one little phalanx - not too badly - and partly dislocated a knuckle. Some scratches and some soft tissue injury. No biggie."
"Knock it the hell off. The doctors aren't going to let you play and you can't. Stay in the hospital and listen to them. Don't go into this macho bull."
"Hail, they've already sent me home. The doctor gave me stuff to reduce the swelling, and he will be at the game to give me a new shot of Novocain before I go in. You're lucky. My father and the coach would have killed you for starting that fight if I couldn't play."
"Andy, I'm serious. Don't! Don't let them make you. How can you anyway? I saw it; you can't throw a ball with that hand."
Andy was laughing at me. "That's why I love you, Hail. You have never even seen me play, have you? So I know you love me for something besides my being a football stud."
"Christ, Andy. So cut the shit. I heard they let you play with a broken wrist last year, and now they are doing it to you again, And you let them! It's only a practice game, jerk."
"Jordan, listen, really. I trust them because they need me. My father and the coach and the doctor don't want to use me up. Not when I still have two years of High School ball to go. OK? Last year I just had a little crack in a carpal. Sports pages call that a broken wrist, because it sounds better, and technically it is, but it isn't like a broken ulna or radius. It didn't even start to swell up until two hours after the game."
"Andy, stop acting like you're so damn smart. What a copal and all that? And how would you know?"
"The carpal is a little flat bone at the end of the palm. The phalanx is a finger bone, and a knuckle is the joint where the finger starts."
"Thanks, I'd heard of that one."
"Ulna and radius are the lower arm bones. Break one of those and your hand looks like one of Irish clubs Leprechauns have in about ten seconds. Hailey, just because I'm a jock doesn't make me stupid, not 'til after the third or forth concussion at any rate."
"I didn't say you were stupid, Andy. I don't think you're dumb."
"High Praise! Thank you. My body is the only tool of my trade, Hail. I listen when people talk about that stuff, and usually I take care of it. Except when some fool friend goes all kung fu panda on three apes."
"You do blame me, don't you?"
"Nah, just teasing. But, Jordan, you don't usually act like that. It could have been handled better."
"I didn't start it!"
"How many fights have you gotten into lately, Hail? You thought having tits and mascara on made you invincible today."
"F you, Andy. They were about to ruin my bikes."
"Oh, Jord, I'm not saying you were to blame or a bigger asshole than them. But you were already mad when we left the diner, and normally you would have reacted a little slower. You just didn't think anyone would attack a girl, and you let Pike have it. Most of the time, you would have been right, but Pike is a bigger asshole than most giant assholes.
"OK. I'm sorry, Andy. It was my fault, I guess." Was he really right? Did I do it?
"Don't over do it. You never did totally lose it like they did. But if you ever do, call me so I can watch, OK. And you kind of need to get your asshole meter recalibrated for when you're being a girl. I didn't think Pike would go that far either though.
"But do you feel guilty enough to came and watch me play tonight?"
"Yeah, and I got to see Mr Friend there too, remember?"
"Oh yeah, but will you come dressed like you were when Tracy saw you at the mall? I want to show you off."
"Andy, you're going to need Tracy still, so you can't do that. And my asshole meter has gotten better, I gotta get out of these things."
"Hey, I'm a superstar jock. I can have two girl friends, and Tracy won't mind."
"She might. I think she has plans for me now. How can you play with your hand like that? No way can you throw or take a hike. I don't care how much stuff they shoot into you."
Andy laughed loudly. "She does? That's wild! Well come dressed anyway. I just want to see it, and leave your bellybutton showing. She told me about your shirt."
"Maybe. How are you going to take hikes and stuff?"
"It's just an intersquad game, Hail. I'll probably only play a half, and we will start with the ball in my hands and just pretend to hike it. You really are worried about me, aren't you?"
"Well, yeah, since it's all my fault."
"Oh, I just want you to be careful is all, Jor. Please. And to just say you like me, at least."
"Andy, so how do you throw with a broken hand?"
"I'll only tell you if you say you like me."
"You know the answer, but just not like that, Andy."
"Com'on. Say, 'I like you, Andy, and I'm worried you will get hurt.'"
"I like you, Andy, but not that way. And I'm worried you'll get hurt again."
"Will you come in a skirt and a cropped shirt to the scrimmage?"
"That wasn't the deal. How will you throw, Andy? I'm almost at my stop, so just tell me."
"If it mattered to you, you would know. I'm left handed. It's a big part of my skill set, Hail. Pike doesn't know that because he's an idiot. Now, are you going to wear the short shirt tonight?"
"Andy, do you keep forgetting you don't even like girls?"
"Hailey, do you keep forgetting you aren't one? I don't. Or are you? Well, at least your body isn't. Are you a girl really though?"
"That's all you like about me, huh? What's between my legs."
"Don't play that. No way is it like that. You're one of my favorite people, and your being killer cute is just an extra."
"Yeah, right. I need to get off the bus now. I'll see you tonight."
"And I'll see your navel tonight too? I really do think I really do love you."
"Shut the holy F up already. Bye."
"Bye, love."
I hung up and leaned back on the bench. I need to get this thing of Andy's straightened out. And fast. Was I leading him on somehow? I didn't mean to be.
I pulled the cord and the bus pulled to the stop across the street from the garage.
The driver said, "You other two need to get off here too. You've made three loops, and it's against the rules."
"We're not bugging anyone," Lori said.
"Don't care; it's the rule. Off now."
Sydney and Lori got off behind me. Sydney said, "'It's the rule.' Why do they need a dumb rule like that?"
I said, "They worry that people will stay on until the bus is empty and then rob the driver."
"We don't do that shit."
"Guess he doesn't know you all that well," I said.
They didn't really seem all that upset by the whole thing, and started walking across the street towards the garage.
"Are you going to the garage?"
"Nah," Lori said, "we will catch the bus going the other way."
The shuttles were free. I guess that made it a cheep thrill for some people. As she was walking across the street, I noticed that Sydney's black polo had a brown spot on the sleeve. I had on just like that on my shirt. It was made by a drop of bleach I think. The weird thing was, that her spot looked just like Florida and the one on mine looked just like Louisiana. Do you think that all bleach drops make the shape of a state? Or maybe it's means something that I see states in random blots.
My Rorschach self analysis ended when I saw a dirty, burgundy Subaru make a u-turn and head back towards me. I wasn't sure if it was that boy's brother or not, but I trotted the rest of the way to the garage. That car drove slowly up the road, and then sped away when I reached the door.
Back among friends at last and temporarily safe from pursuit, Jordan looks for new avenues of investigation, new ways to solve . . .
Many, many thanks to my friends and beta readers, Kristina and Daphne, for their kindness and aid, and to all those who have commented, or voted, on the earlier parts. You are the muse fuel.
11: Allies?
5:15pm. Having no other choice, the August sun beat down on the parking lot around the garage and gas pumps. The blacktop dutifully sent the heat skyward in almost visible waves.
The Case of the Missing MacGuffin was twenty hours old. I still had few leads, but the case was now pursuing me, and it was getting closer and closer.
Reaching the door to the office was like reaching a haven. Behind it were friends; behind it were allies.
I tagged the door's handle and turned around to watch the dirty, dark red car speed away. Was it following me? Was it the same one that had been at the bus stop? It must have been. Were they chasing me because they knew I was searching for the MacGuffin? Were they minions of the Ferral boys with whom I had fought? Perhaps. Perhaps now I'd never know.
I entered the room and cold, moist air grasped my body like a securing hug. I slumped against the door sill and slid down the wall to sit on the cold linoleum floor.
Tracy was at the desk behind the counter, sitting on top of Blair. She said, "Hi. Can I help you? -- Is something wrong?"
Blair jumped up, almost throwing Tracy to the floor, and yelled, "Jordan! Goood Gawd! What happened?"
Tracy looked at Blair and then at me. Her eyes flew open. "My! Jorie, what's wrong?"
Blair reached me first and was leaning over me, stroking the back of my head.
I began laughing; I'm not sure why. "There were these boys, and I think they followed me all the way while I was on the bus."
"Idiot!" Blair said. "That's why girls go in packs. Christ, Jordan!"
Blair almost picked me up off the floor and guided me to the chair behind the desk.
I said, "Well, I was on a busy street and on the bus. I don't think they could have really done anything, but it was just creepy seeing their car when I got off the bus."
Blair still leered at me. "Look at you. If you go naked, every boy in town would trail you."
"Thank you, mother," I said with a snarl that turned into another laugh.
Tracy laughed too. "No. No boys would follow Jordan then. Well, Andy and a few might." She had sat on top of the desk and now put her feet on it too. Her prairie skirt bunched around her waist. I don't know if she was giving me a glace of things that high up on purpose or not.
Then she said, "Your hair is fantastic. What did you do to it? It's really -- I love it!"
"It's only temporary. White hair stood out and that's what the cops are looking for."
Blair said, "Yeah, neon pink and blue just blends in everywhere. It's great for camouflage."
I ignored her and said, "We have to talk about the case and Andy's hand. I think the assholes from Ferral -- the ones in that fight -- are the ones who stole the MacGuffin, and it could have been their friends following me."
"Shssss," Tracy said and then hollered, "Daddy, my friend got here. We're going over to the Dairy Queen and get a coke."
"No. You're not," answered a disembodied voice from the back office where a loud TV and several men were talking about a football game. "Once Jimmy gets that truck washed, you're going to clean the inside. And I need you to stay here 'til closing."
Tracy wagged her head and mouthed words, mocking her father. She got off the desk and moved into my lap.
"Don't talk too loud," she said as she played with my hair. Then she noticed my ears. "Oh, you got your ears done too! You gonna wear those flowers to school too, Jorie?"
I wiggled around until I got her weight off my legs and onto the chair. She put her arms around my neck and her legs across the chair's arm, and again let her skirt bunch up at her hips. Blair had taken the seat on top of the desk and leered at us.
"No, I got keepers put in so I can change to little studs for school and stuff. But look at my bellybutton."
"That too! You're so lucky my daddy won't let me because he heard one person some where got an infection, and like it's a big thing to him."
Blair said, "You can't change that for school, Jordan, you know. You've really gone all the way, huh?"
"I wear a shirt at school, Blair. No one has to see it."
Tracy said, "Yours is pierced too, Blair. What's so bad about it?"
I got back to the important topics and told them about the fight, about getting chased by the cops this morning, and about what the cops' DayOS Makina said about Blair. Tracy was genuinely upset once she heard what had happened to Andy's hand, even though we knew it would be all right now. Even Blair was angry at the Ferral jerks.
"We need to get back at those creeps," Tracy said. "What's going to happen to them?"
I told her what Officer Benwell had said and that Andy didn't want to do anything that would keep any of them from playing in next week's game.
Tracy hid her face in my shoulder for a second and then jumped up. She yelled into the other room, "Daddy, Jim's done. We're going to go start on the truck. Can you get the phones and listen for the door?"
"Watch for people coming in and don't leave until at least that truck is picked up, Tracy. You can leave the other tickets with Jesse at the pumps. Are you doing something tonight?"
"Daddy! I told you! I have to be at the scrimmage with the cheerleaders, and then I might spend the night at a friend's. I'll call if that works out; as usual. You said I could use that yellow Miata tonight, remember?"
"Yeah, but drive it right, no tickets. I can't afford your insurance already. And do that truck right. Kipperman's a good costumer. Tell me when you leave."
The truck looked exactly like the one I'd seen Kipperman use to move the MacGuffin this morning, but Tracy said it couldn't be because it had been dropped off last night. He has four trucks for his lawn service, all red, two regular half ton pickups, one with a back seat in the cab, and one that was jacked up and had big wheels.
Tracy didn't know who had dropped this one off, or at what time. The key had been put through the slot after the garage was closed.
A boy was scrubbing the wheels when we got to the back of the garage, and Tracy said, "Get a move on, Jim-boy! Let's get it done, Bro!"
"Go for it, Sis," the boy a few years younger than us said, "but don't get Dad on my case."
Tracy squirted some foam on the back wheel and wiped it off quickly. She gave the can and a rag to Blair, and Blair did the same to the wheels on the other side.
The boy said, "Great job." He backed away from the truck, waiting for me to bend over, I think.
While Tracy was handing out tools to Blair and me, the tow truck driver that had given us a ride last night walked over.
"Your daddy working you too hard, Tracy?"
"He's a tyrant, Mac. A tyrant."
"Could be worse, girl. He's asking way too much for that little car just so it won't sell, because you like it so much, you know?"
"Yeah, I know. He's a tyrant, but I've got him wrapped around my finger. Don't tell him I said that, Mac.
"Your secret's safe, but we all know that already."
"You know, I've never driven a car that didn't have a 'For Sale' sign on it, though."
"You will some day, unless you marry a mechanic. So ya'll are all going to the scrimmage tonight. What you going to do 'til then."
"Shopping! Of course. What else."
"Oh, I was wondering if you'll were gonna go eat fish bait again."
"We'll do that too."
"Who's got the best bait sold these days, girls?"
"Oh, we'll probably just go to Yo-uri-ko's. It's not the best, but it's at the mall. You going to the scrimmage too?"
"Gonna try. Want to see my boys play. I'll see ya' there -- Be good ta' then."
"I'm always real, real good, Mac." Tracy said it in a breathless voice that made it an obvious double entendre.
"Gaa, quit growing up so fast, girl."
The three of us started working on the truck. I was leaning over, vacuuming under the driver's seat, and said, "Does that guy really have two kids on the team?"
"Who? Mac?" Tracy said. "No, he was talking about the whole defense. He's like an assistant coach for the freshmen and junior varsity, and he works with Andy's father on the summer football things at the parks. So he calls every defense player in town his boys."
Then she came up behind me and goosed me. She was getting worse than Andy had ever been.
When I hollered and jumped, Blair said, "Just cut it out, Jordan! Don't squeal like that. For gawd's sake!"
I gave them each my most withering stare and went to the other side of the truck and started washing the dashboard. It was closer to the wall, and my ass wouldn't be sticking out.
Tracy giggled for longer than necessary. She said, "I sort of think Mac is real jealous of Andy. He's the only guy from this town to ever play pro ball, and that's his claim to fame, but he was only second string for like two years, and everyone knows Andy's going to be a big, huge star."
"I don't get why people make such a big deal out of that stuff," I said. "I told Andy I'd be there, but the cops are looking for me so I can't change clothes, and I bet I get spotted."
"I doubt it," Blair said. "People don't know how weird you are yet. No one will expect this."
"Well, I have to go and cheerlead," Tracy said, "and there will be lots of people to talk to. Someone might have some information about the MacGuffin, you know."
Blair was inside the truck, dusting the insides of the air vents with a toothbrush, and said, "Yeah, Jordan, you have to solve this case, right? The whole town and the cops need you. That's so you can wear skirts shorter than Tracy's cheerleader's outfit."
To shut Blair up, I turned on the vacuum and started cleaning behind the bench seat.
Then I saw something under the seat just before the vacuum swallowed it. A piece of paper was wrapped around six, bright pink pills. I'd never seen any like them before. It wasn't a big clue, but maybe they would tell me something about Kipperman's health, and every iota of information is important. I started to put them into my pockets but, of course, I didn't have any. I slipped them under the strap on the gaff; at least they would stay there.
Blair saw me doing that, and I told her I was just adjusting things.
She wagged her head and said, "You really are getting in to this, huh, Jorie? I can't believe it."
"You know it is just a disguise, damn it." I was whispering so Tracy couldn't hear over the vacuums. "Why is it such a big deal to you? The cops are looking for a boy with white hair. So I'm a girl with lots of colors in her hair. And I told you they think you're under house arrest too. You should become a boy with something besides black hair, Blair. Really."
"And how do I do that?"
I told her about the PlaHot DevIce. And she didn't reject the idea. It was harder to convince her to take most of her jewelry out of her ears and remove the make up and nail polish.
"So I'd have to look like a complete dweeb next to your hot little chick thing?"
"You're going to find something wrong with everything, aren't you? You can still wear ear studs. That won't be total dweeb, and we're going to a stupid football game. I'll be the one out of place, the only girl at the scrimmage that's not a cheerleader."
Blair stared at me, biting her upper lip.
I said, "Look, why is it so different? You try to look like a boy all the time anyway, Blair."
Blair said, "No, I don't, asshole." She turned to Tracy and asked if there was any polish remover around, but left before Tracy answered.
After a couple of minutes I left Tracy to finish the truck -- it was her job anyway -- and went to help Blair.
When I walked into the bathroom, she had the polish off of seven fingers already. She just rolled her eyes at me and said, "Come right in. I guess you should feel at home in here, huh?"
Tracy was the only other person within miles likely to come in here. I ignored the remark and said, "What color do you want your hair?"
"Is the red going to look like that mahogany stuff or a bright orange bozo or something?"
"It says fire red. We can do one strip and then change to blonde if you don't like it. One piece of red in blonde would look interesting."
"You're really are getting into this, Jord. Are you going to become a hair stylist now?"
I could have said "fuck you, Bitch." Instead I said, "Never know. You have something against hair dressers now, Blair?"
Blair didn't answer. In fact, until I was almost finished she didn't say anything else, only nodded when I asked if the red dye was acceptable and if she wanted two blond streaks in the front. When I was on the last lock of hair, she said, "So really, Jord, do you think you are actually a girl?"
"Shut the hell up, bitch," I said calmly and continued doing her hair.
I turned her to look in the mirror and said, "I think it looks good. So really, Blair, do you think you are actually a boy?"
"Shut the fuck up, bitch," she said calmly.
Tracy came in and yelled, "All done, even though I got abandoned."
She put her arms around my neck and tilted her head onto my shoulder. "Wow, Jorie, that's wonderful. You look great, Blair; no one is going to know you. But now you should get out of this room before someone drives up. Could you go outside and watch for people while I change?"
Blair just glared at her and left without a word. I started to follow but Tracy held onto me. She said, "Wait, Jorie, I want you to do something for me."
I said, "Tracy, you don't need a disguise. They aren't after you."
Once the door was closed behind Blair, Tracy kissed me, stuck her tongue in my mouth and wrapped her teeth around my lip.
I pulled back. "You're really bugging Blair, you know, and when I'm back to being Jordan again, you're going to lose all interest in me."
"Maybe. Maybe not," she said. She pulled a string at her waist and let her skirt fall to the floor. She was wearing a pair of pink panties, of course, with lots of lace, not quite a thong but almost. I wondered if I'd wind up wearing things like that now. The way things were going, it seemed inevitable.
She took off her t-shirt, and she wasn't wearing a bra. I let out a huge sigh and let my shoulders fall, but Tracy didn't notice.
She said, "Is that stuff easy to get out? Could you give me a white streak on one side?"
I stared at her until she put her hands on my back and pushed me to the sink. With her breasts squeezed against my back, she said, "Please, Jorie."
"Come on! Damn it. I don't like this fucking game, Tracy. You don't really like people like me. You have admitted it."
"Nah-uh. I always liked you, Jorie. Really. Can't we be friends? That's all I want. Come on, do my hair."
"Just get dressed first. This stuff won't get on your clothes."
She took a powder blue T with a cloud of yellow flowers on the front from a locker and slipped it on. It almost hid the top of her panties.
While I was doing her hair, I said, "Blair is really getting ticked about this. And this isn't really me. You're screwing things up and are going to miss her when she is gone."
"Maybe I'm not really what Blair wants, Jorie. It makes me sad. Really. But things never last that long for me. Ever."
I thought that was obviously because she flirted with everyone, no matter what kind of relationship she was in. But I didn't say anything. It would have done no good.
Tracy added, "And maybe this is really you too! Have you thought about that?"
When I had finished doing her hair, she gave me a hug and a kiss again before telling me how wonderful it was. I had given up fighting her off by then.
Then, with one arm still around my neck, she began pulling up my top. I tried to hold it down.
"Hey, I showed you mine! You gotta show me yours now. Besides we're all girls here, right? Or if you're not, showing your chest is no big deal. Either way you gotta show me."
I sighed and lifted up my top. She began fondling the forms as if they were real. I couldn't feel it, of course, but I let her anyway.
"They look nice, but why did you get ones so small?"
I shrugged and told her I like them like that, that it looked more natural.
"Oh. I like huge titties so much! Can we get you some balloons to wear?"
I snickered and shook my head. "Why don't you try some sometime, Trace, if you like them like that so much?"
"Ugh, not on me! On my friends. And these are better than having nothing."
"But Blair hides hers."
"Yeah, but she has really nice ones. Not big, but all round and -- nice."
She pinched the middle of the forms and said, "Why don't they have nibbies?"
"You can get them, but I didn't think I'd need things like that sticking out all the time."
"We could glue some pencil erasers on, or find some old bolts in the garage."
"No! These things cost a ton."
"I guess not," she said and giggled. She put her head back on my shoulder still fondling one of my breasts. "Too bad."
It did seem to make her genuinely sad, and I rubbed her back. She nibbled my neck some.
12: Adversaries?
Blair stuck her head in the door and made a very loud gulping sound before she said, "Hate to ruin all the fun, but someone just drove up."
Tracy said, "That will be the guys for Kipperman's truck. We can go as soon as I'm done with them. Tell them I'll be right there, Blair."
Tracy tool a pair of shortalls from a locker, and slipped them on. "Can you help me with these button things, Jorie."
Blair stormed out.
I started to do the two top hooks on Tracy's overall., I remembered those being tricky when I was little and wore things like that, but she said, "Do the side ones first."
"Tracy! You can dress yourself."
She stuck out the tip of her tongue, grinned and said, "Pretty please."
The shortalls were white with little pink and blue hearts all over them. They were so tight on her I could see why she wanted help, and they didn't really cover all of her cheeks either.
Once I had her dressed we went into the garage and saw another red truck parked by the bay. Then I saw Jojo and Hancock going towards the office.
I told Tracy they were the jerks that had ruined Andy's hand. She huffed and bit her lip, but then walked over to them. I ducked back into the women's room and called Blair from the other door which opened into the office.
"So, Jorie, did you and Tracy have fun?"
"Yeah, lots, Blair. Now shut up. You know she'll stop that stuff and go back to you the second I'm out of disguise."
"But when will that be? Ever? And will you stop? Getting Tracy is a big reward for doing something you love to do."
"I keep telling you that it isn't for me! Now just listen! That's two of the guys that smashed Andy's hand out there, Blair, and I think they took the MacGuffin too, and they know me," I said.
Blair laughed -- actually laughed -- about that. "Well, that's why you're dressed like a slut, isn't it? To hide?"
"They know me in the disguise! I was a girl when they had the fight."
I went into the stall and closed the door.
"Are you going to take a piss with me right here, Jordan? You really have gone all the way. Be sure to sit down, girl."
"Shut up and deal, Blair! Why are you blowing off this case? You're the one they pulled in."
I'd only gone into the stall to adjust things inside my gaff. I wondered if those tape things really worked like Q said they did. When I pulled the gaff down the piece of paper that I had found in the truck fell out and some of the pills rolled out of the stall.
Blair picked one up and said, "Jordan, you're taking these!! You really are serious, aren't you? I'm sorry. I didn't realize."
"I found them in Kipperman's truck. Do you know what they are?"
"Everyone knows that trannies take pink pills, Jordan. Knock it off. How long have you been doing them? Where do you get them?"
"Blair! They aren't mine! Geezus! Am I the only one that cares about the MacGuffin? They were in the truck. I'm doing all of this for you, and all you do is keep giving me shit."
"Yeah, I just bet that Kipperman is taking massive estrogen, Jord. OK, I'll see if Luke can get that clown to say anything about the MacGuffin, and you can have some alone time with Tracy. Luke is me, if you didn't get that."
I opened the stall door just in time to see Blair go into the garage. I went to the other door and opened it a crack.
I heard Jojo say, "Com'on, Tracy. It wasn't me. It was Pike. He goes all ape-shit sometimes. Hell, if Andy doesn't play, kicking Northfud's butt won't be the same."
"Yeah," another voice said, I guess it was Hancock, "and we didn't start it. It was some crazy little chickie that Andy was with. She just tore into Pike for no reason."
I wanted to go out and slug the jerk.
"It was kinda funny." Jojo was talking again. "She was taking on Pike and Bill all alone. Andy and I were just trying to stop them until Pike went all postal. Have you and Andy called it quits or something? He was pretty tight with that girl."
"You're not going to say you did it for me are you, Jojo? That's crap." Tracy said.
I heard Blair then, her voice was a little lower than usual. "Did you guys really take the MacGuffin too? I heard you said a bunch about it during the fight."
Real tactful, Blair! I groaned silently.
"Who the hell said something about that. It's a damn lie!" Hancock said.
"Just asking," Blair said. "Someone told me you bragged about it during the fight. Really, I think it would be cool to grab that thing, kinda."
Jojo laughed. "Yeah, but we didn't. Man, who would want that kind of shit? That whole night was just weird. Anyway, who are you?"
"Luke Blair," Blair said.
"He goes to Southlake, and helps around here sometimes."
"A freshman?" Jojo asked, or maybe declared. "To bad you can't go to a real school. Your team sucks annually, you know."
"Sophmore. We win a few B-ball games sometime anyway." Blair said.
Hancock said, "I'm leaving. Hand me the key, Tracy. Joe, you're getting me at Kipperman's shed, right?"
"Yeah. I'll see you later, Tracy. Listen, when you find out about Andy's new girl friend, give me a call. I'll treat you right."
"Thanks, Jojo. I'll keep you in mind," Tracy said, "but don't hold your breath or, on second thought, go ahead and hold it."
Jojo chuckled.
Blair said, "You're not going near the mall, are you? Tracy was going to give me a ride, but her Miata is going to be crowded. Could I get a ride? "
She was getting into a car with that jerk!
"OK," Jojo said. "I can get you there, I guess. Have to pick up Hancock first. Always willing to help an unfortunate Southie. See what a nice guy I am, Tracy?"
Tracy said, "Get out so I can lock up and leave." She was actually letting Blair go alone with that guy!
After they had left, Tracy promised me that Jojo wasn't all that bad, and that it was only Pike that needed to be watched. I'd seen something different today, however. Tracy finished the paperwork, and I used her cell to call Blair.
"Hi, Tonya," Blair said.
"Tonya? Blair, you got in a car alone with the ass that broke Andy's hand!!"
"Uh-huh, going to have to change that ring tone. Everyone knows my girl friend is calling me. It will be OK. I thought you wanted me to look into that thing, so I'm headed to the mall to do that. OK? Look I can't hear because of static. I'll call you when I get to the mall. Bye."
"Keep you're finger on the emergency button!" I yelled, but I think she had already hung up.
I tried to call Andy too, but only got his voice mail. I dropped into the desk chair and sighed.
Tracy came and got into my lap. Now I was squashed, as if I wasn't already down enough.
"It will be OK, Jorie," she said and kissed me and wiggled her butt. I was getting so tired of that; when was she going to get over it?
Nothing was going right. Nothing was going to be OK. Still.
"Let's go, Tracy," I said, pushing her away. "Let's get to the mall.
"Yeah! We got time for lots of shopping before the scrimmage, and there are some things I want you to try on."
"I just want to go right to Old Navy and get some bike shorts to wear under this stupid skirt."
"Why do you want to put something on under that, Jorie? It looks great."
"Because I have to watch my every move. Every boy in town is looking at me waiting for something to slip, and a girl is too."
Tracy giggled and said, "More than one, babe. That's the greatest thing about being a girl. Everyone looks at you! The girls that aren't interested one way are still checking out the competition. Come on -- lets find us some ammunition, girlfriend."
"Tracy, that's not what I want to do tonight!"
"I know, I know. You're on a mission. But your agent is still out. Let's try on some things until Blair calls. We can do that, can't we?"
"And I don't want to waste all my money."
"They don't charge to use the changing rooms, babe. This is going to be fun!"
13: Investigating?
I never agreed to Tracy's shopping spree. I still wanted to go straight to one of the cheap stores and buy some shorts, nothing more, but that proved to be impossible.
Tracy parked her car near the Nordstrom's entrance and before we got through the store I'd had five dresses held up to me "just to see", and I'd held three up to Tracy. At that store the clerks were so attentive, I didn't have to try anything on. Tracy's second stop was Victoria's Secret and was only window shopping too, but when we got to The Gap my luck had run out.
There weren't any of the kind of shorts that I wanted but Tracy found four things that she demanded to see me in. The booths were tiny and there was barely room for one person to stand in them. Still I had to push Tracy out and cross my heart three times as I promised I'd show her each outfit, before she would let me change alone.
Once she was gone I stared at the dresses. There was a light blue halter-topped sun dress with tiny, yellow daisies forming pin stripes. I decided that one would be the first.
I stepped into it, and tried four times before I got the strings tied in the right place. I looked in the full length mirror. Tracy had grabbed one that was smaller than any sales assistant would have told me to try on. It was much shorter than the designer had intended, and the top didn't come around as far either. I wasn't sure at all that that kind of top would ever work for me.
I kept just looking in the mirror. It was made of cotton, very soft and light. This was the very first brand new dress I'd ever had on in my life. I spun around and around trying to see lots of angles in the mirror.
Tracy hollered from the corridor. "Come on, Jorie! Let me see already! It's been an age."
Time was up. I'd have to at least walk out into the store with this on. I kept my arms crossed as I walked out.
"Ohhh. That's awesome. Put your arms down."
I did, but I grabbed Tracy and whispered into her ear. "Look at the top. Does it come around far enough too keep the seams on my boobs hidden?"
Sympathy isn't one of Tracy's more common responses, and she burst out laughing. "Com'on. Let's go have a look."
She pulled me back to the dressing room and stood in the open door. She had me spin around with my arms in lots of different positions. Then she said, "Nope. It stays closed just enough. Of course when your tities grow it might be a problem."
I sighed at her, but giggled too. When she finished laughing at me, she said, "Can't you hide those some way?"
"Yeah, if you're real careful with the glue and use make up, I think, but it's hard on the sides, and I'm no expert."
"You seem pretty darn good at it to me. Try on another one. Faster this time!"
Even though it was just a skirt, the next thing I had to wear for her was of the little black dress type, a kind of thing I'd never worn before, and I was really surprised that Tracy had picked it out. Also it looked pretty stupid when I put the top I'd been wearing back on.
Tracy cracked up when she saw that combination too and pulled me over to the blouses. I took a solid white one with a bow at the neck instead of the pink one with a peter pan collar she liked.
"Wow, I can see why you kept hovering around that skirt, Jorie. Not my thing, but you look fantastic. Not with that hair though. Do you have the right shoes?"
I rolled my eyes at her. Yeah, like it was all my idea.
Again, I had one of my unique worries though, and again I cupped my hand to Tracy's ear to ask about it. This time she didn't pull me into the dressing room, she just spun me around and pulled the slit in the side of the skirt apart right in the store.
At least she did keep her voice down when she said, "Well, Jord, you can't wear great big briefs like that with that skirt, but get some panties with higher cut sides -- or a thong -- and you have nothing to worry about. Why do you think I always called you 'bubble butt'? You can show a bit of bun any time! And you can see the shape in that already."
The other two outfits she had me put on were all Tracy. One was a smocked-topped dress with a bow in back and balloon sleeves. If it hadn't been for the box neckline that came so low, it would have been a little girl's favorite. I think she had dreams of getting one just like it and us going about as twins.
After that I was down to the last thing she was making me wear, a raspberry trapeze dress with absolutely no shape at all, and I was finally done with all that.
As soon as we got out of the store, Tracy started to hold my hand. I thought of my mother doing that today too, and I smiled and wondered if I'd ever get to walk though a mall with free hands again.
But I also decided that, just to be nice to Mom even if she'd never know about it, I'd get out of this skirt she hated. I pulled Tracy back into the store and bought the little blue sun dress and changed into it.
When we were walking through the mall, I asked her again if the top was wide enough.
"Worrywart! I guarantee no one can see anything, Jorie."
"Well, it's really a size too small, is all."
"Yeah, but they want it to be too long. I think it'd be better even a lot shorter."
"Not a lot! But maybe a couple of inches or so."
"Can you sew?"
"Me? Not likely. Even if my Mom could, she isn't likely to have taught me to, now is she? Did your mom teach you to?"
Tracy's hand tightened on mine just perceptibly. "My mom never taught me a thing, Jordan."
"I'm sorry." I didn't really know about her family at all and had hit a nerve.
"Why? You didn't have anything to do with it, did you? She walked out on us when I was about five and Jimmy was two and Greg was at school. Just went out to the garage and never came back. Jimmy started crying and I couldn't get him stop until Greg got home and called Daddy."
"You don't know what happened to her?"
"Yeah, nothing. Just went away. She wouldn't come back. I never saw her again. I don't fucking care what happened to her."
I wrapped her in a hug,even though we were right in the middle of the mall walkway. I said, "I'm sorry," again because I really couldn't think of anything else to say at all.
"Stop saying that, silly! You were only five too. You didn't kidnap her, I'm sure."
I giggled.
"It really is OK, Jord. A long time ago and all, you know? And you are so sweet that it's magic. I don't tell anyone that stuff, Jorie, really. You pulled it out of my lips some how, didn't you?"
"I sorry," I said, but smiling.
She leaned her head on my shoulder and began rubbing my side.
"Uh-oh," she said, "We need to get you some more new clothes! I told Andy about seeing your bellybutton this afternoon, and he made me promise to make you wear something like that to the game tonight."
"Tracy! We've shopped enough!"
"You have. I haven't tried on anything yet. That's not fair! And I told him that before I knew you got it pierced. Don't you want to show that off?"
I wasn't totally sure that I hadn't sort of made Andy the same promise, but we had already spent too long in the mall.
"We should have heard from Blair by now! Look at your phone and see if there's a message. Let me call her!"
There was no message and Blair didn't answer. "So you still think Jojo is such a great guy? Shit!"
"Clam down, Jord! Geez! It hasn't been an hour yet -- well, just barely. I'll call Jojo and see what is going on, OK?"
She Has His Number On Her Phone?
"Jojo, you didn't kidnap that guy you gave a ride to, did you?"
I leaned close to Tracy's ear, but still couldn't hear Jojo's answers.
"I don't know. Maybe to blackmail me into going on a date? I don't like him nearly enough for that. Nah - ugh - half-hour."
...
"Ummm. OK, we'll just keep looking around."
...
"No, but he does dye his hair I think, but that doesn't make him one of those."
...
"Yeah, pretty sure. I need to find him. Bye."
Tracy closed the phone and said, "Nope he didn't kidnap her. He dropped her off about thirty minutes ago. She's her somewhere."
"Then why wouldn't she have called? How can you believe him?"
"Well, because as stupid as he is, he isn't dumb enough to kill her when people know she was in his truck. He'd at least wait 'til tomorrow sometime."
"It's not funny, Trace!"
"No, it wouldn't be if something really happened. But let's just walk around and see if we spot her before we call the National Guard. Want to go to Clair's and Piercing Pagoda and find some things to stick in your tummy?"
"I have to keep this one in for eight weeks."
Somehow that sentence was seen as agreement. I did insist we go by the sushi shop first and look for Blair, but she was nowhere to be seen. We headed back to the jewelry stores but on the way discovered a big sale at American Eagle Outfitters, and Tracy had always wanted a pair of destroyed denim shorts.
The store was crowded but within five minutes we were standing in line for the dressing rooms, each holding four brand new pairs of ripped up shorts and a few tops.
When we were near the front of the line I asked Tracy if she really needed help with the top hooks on her shortalls, and if she wanted me to do them then. She said, "Yeah, they're almost impossible. But, Jorie, let's just share a room. Or it will take us days of getting back in line. These are bigger. We'll have room, and we did it before."
I couldn't find an answer that I wanted to speak even in a whisper with other people so close, so I agreed by silence. It was a mistake.
I walked in to the room first and, before the door was closed, Tracy pulled the string that was holding up my dress. The thing had fallen half way off me before I realized it, and I yelped. I turned around to see Tracy giggling and giggled to. I let the dress fall the rest of the way, and reached out to undo her buttons.
Staying very quite, she said, "Wow, Jor, those are some real, real unsexy undies you have on. But I thought you had -- I mean -- don't. . ." She reached over and started rubbing my crotch.
I tried to move her arm away and whispered, "Don't, Tracy."
But she wasn't done. She put her arm around my back and kept moving her hand between my legs. "But I thought you -- don't you have..."
It was only seconds, but I could already feel the results, and her hair in my face and her smell in my nose didn't help any. "Yes, I do. Now stop it, damn it." I spoke in more of a low growl than a whisper now, and I had shoved her away, hard.
"Screw you, bitch, then! Just fuck off," she muttered and stormed out.
I threw my dress on and was still tying the sting behind my neck as I hurried out after her. I saw her leaving the store, and I began to trot. I called her name, and she shook her head but didn't turn around. When I was in the mall I yelled, "I'm sorry. Just listen, Tracy."
Finally she sat down beside one of the fountains.
"I thought we had become friends." She was crying.
"Tracy, please listen. I do have those things down there. Do you know how they work?"
She glared at me with the evil eye. Well, I was unsure. She was known to be interested in other things.
"OK," I said, "Well, I've got on this thing. It holds all that down - real tight - down between my legs. That's the only way I could ever wear shorts like we were looking at. And with that skirt -- I thought -- you know, just in case. But those bits can decide to. . ."
"They spring up when they get hard! Oh."
"Yeah, and it can hurt."
"And my touching you there. . ."
"Yeah, or when you rub against me with your naked tits, or wiggle in my lap, or like that."
"I'm sorry, Jordan. I -- I -- " She sniffled. "It hurts a lot?"
"It can after a while. Tracy, can't we just be friends? Just regular friends? And not have to do like that?"
"I won't any more. I didn't mean it to be mean at all, but it was, wasn't it? Even without that thing you have. But, Jordan, I don't do well with just regular friends. It always turns into sex and then it always turns into shit."
"It doesn't always have to. You think that's happening with Blair?"
She nodded.
"But, Trace, she is only real pissed because of what you are doing when I'm around."
"Not just that. Before too. She doesn't really want what I want, Jor."
"I don't think you want what I've got. Do you? And Blair is weird and a half, Trace. But she is worth the effort. Just work it out with her. Give it time"
"And you and I aren't weird?" Finally she smiled.
"When we find her, don't start flirting with me, and hang on me. I think that hurts her. Do it to her. I think she really does want to be real close to you. Maybe just not go as far as you want."
"You don't really understand, Jord, but you really care about her, huh?"
"Partners. And even if you did break up with her, even if she dumped you, I could never go out with you. Not for years and years, Tracy."
"OK, I'll try to stop, but you are just so, so cute. Do you really think we can be just friends? Forever?"
"Why not? And even if Blair isn't what you are looking for for forever, she can be great for for-now."
She rubbed an eye, and said, "I really do want to get a pair of those shorts."
"Me too! Let's hurry before they are all gone!"
We held hands again and walked back into the store and towards the dressing rooms. "But we can't use the same room, huh," she said.
"No, that will be OK."
"What? My bod doesn't make you hard? Oh, of course."
"No. Seeing doesn't do it for me. So I can help you with your buttons. But don't you just want me to do that just to be turning me on? And I don't want to do things that -- you know -- make you want to do things that aren't going to happen."
"No. I just like -- I don't know. It isn't like that though. But what about seeing Andy naked, Jord? Would that make that thing you wear hurt?"
"No. I've tested with porn. I'm just not visual, I guess. With anyone."
"Can we kiss?"
I pecked her on the cheek and said, "Sure. But not with tongues for long. OK? And not when Blair is around, Trace. It's not fair to her, Trace. Really."
After pecking me on my lips, she said, "You are so nice. Can I be your partner like Blair?"
"No! She's the only partner I can handle, and it's a pain! Not the kind down there; in the part back behind that, and a royal one. We can just be friends. Real, real friends.
"Best friends?"
I nodded and put my head on her shoulder.
"Best best friends?"
Nod.
"Best best girl friends?"
"Not the code word kind? Yeah, alright I guess, in private for that part most of the time though."
"Best best girl friends forever?"
"Tracy! Can't you take yes for an answer?"
In less than two hours something had happened to Tracy. I don't know what it was. I felt differently about her. It was like we had something in common, maybe. But I have no idea what the something could be, because we were so different in every way.
These clothes were doing something to my head, I think. It would be hard to break it to Tracy when I went back to my old opinions once I got back into some baggy cargos and a band shirt. But she would probably feel totally differently then too.
But for right now it was fun being with her.
We stood in the line until we could get back into the room where we had left all of our stuff and talked about her brothers and family while we waited. I had never heard her talk about things like that before. Even with Blair, she always talked about celebrities and school intrigues and teacher's idiocies and like that.
Seeing girls in these kinds of shorts hadn't really given me an idea of how tiny they are. My Mom probably wouldn't have approved, and I would have chickened out if Trace hadn't been there and started making clucking sounds. And she pointed out that they were more modest than most swim suits, which was true.
She bought two pairs. I only got one, and they didn't look like faded blue jeans, more like they had once been white and were washed with a red sweater, and they had one blue gingham pocket and one yellow calico pocket that stuck out below the frayed edges of the legs. I also bought a new cami top that looked like water stained silk with a draw string neck. It also had a draw string at the bottom that wasn't meant to do anything, but I could tuck the hem up and use the string to keep it any length I wanted. I think it's pretty great even though Tracy said it looks like a potato sack.
When we had paid for them the shopping trip was finally over, at last.
Tracy tried to call Blair again, but still got no answer. Even Tracy was getting seriously worried and bit her thumb, but she tried to hide it.
Tracy put her arm on my shoulders. "She's probably around here somewhere, Jorie. Don't worry; we will find her. Maybe she just wouldn't come into the girl's sections of the stores because of how she was dressed. Or something."
We walked from one end of the mall to the other looking for her. It was the only idea I could come up with, and it was better than sitting still.
At the far end of the food court -- Blair wasn't there -- we made a quick U-turn. That was when I saw two younger boys quickly turn and look at the Mrs. Field's counter. One of them was Bobby from the bus stop.
I pulled Tracy into a faster walk. At the first corner I glance back. They were following us!
"Trace, do you know that boy? He's the one that tried to get me into that car and then followed me on the bus, and now he is here!"
"Damn. Jorie. Let's go. Let's get out of here."
"But Blair!?"
We stopped walking, so we could think. The two boys went into a book store, but we could see them waiting near the door.
"OK. OK," Tracy said, "there's nothing they can do to us inside here. It could be a coincidence. Lot's of people come to the mall on Saturday night. And you picking up a stalker isn't that weird, and they're only freshmen or so, not real threats. So, let's just be calm. OK?"
"They have to have something to do with the MacGuffin Case, Trace. They have to be friends of Pike and Jojo. Where is Blair?!"
"Let's go to the sushi place. If she's looking for us she will come in there sooner or later. OK?"
I nodded and we started walking again. "We need to get back on the case. I've wasted way too much time. And the cops are going to find out who I am and. . ."
"What else could we have done? And shopping is never a waste of time, girl! Stop that kind of talk." She quickly glanced over her shoulder. "They're still there. -- We can talk to people tonight. I've asked some people to keep their ears open too and let me know what they hear."
"Like who?"
"Mac. That tow truck driver, and he's going to talk to his ex wife, who hears about almost everything sooner or later. And I'll talk to some of the cops I know too."
"Not that lieutenant. She's the one who's convinced Blair and I did it."
"Well, I can find out why she thinks that, if I see her, OK? So see there is progress, and Blair is around too. Cheer up, best best girl friend for forever, OK?"
I smiled at her calling me all of that.
She said, "Hey, you know what? I think you need company tonight, since you've got a stalker. We are BBGFFFs; do you think I should spend the night at your house? No, making out or snuggling, just laughing and being safe. I promise."
I burst out laughing. "Tracy! I can see it! My 'rents finally decide I'm not gay by catching a girl in my bed! They pop from delight and explode in anger at the very same instant."
Tracy started laughing as hard as I was.
"Maybe at your house?"
"Yuck! No Way? "
"It would drive Blair crazy too."
Just then some one slapped me on the back of my head! Really hard!
I turned around and Blair was standing there, utterly pissed. "Well, screwing Blair sounds like a great idea, huh!" she said.
I threw my arms around Blair. That wasn't something we usually did and she stiffened. I said, "Creep! Where have you been!? Why didn't you call?! We've been scared S-less!"
She pulled away from my arms and said, "Some little dweeb ran down my phone battery. And everyone in this place has been an asshole all night."
Tracy grabbed Blair in a tight hug. That didn't calm Blair down though. She kept glaring at me even while she petted Tracy.
Tracy said, "We have been looking all over, Blair. We were so worried."
Blair kicked one of the shopping bags I'd dropped. "Yeah, I can see how hard you've been looking! You even changed clothes again, Jordan. The skirt's thrill wear off? How many little outfits are you planning to get into today?
"I didn't mean to take you damn phone, and you know it, and I didn't use it much, and didn't have a charger. So knock it off. You could have looked for us! Or waited at Yo-uri-ko's. And I'm sick of you being mad at me. Everything isn't always my fault, jerk."
I walked off and sat on a bench twenty feet away. I had could see Tracy wispering to Blair, and see them making out some more. At least, because of the way that Blair was dressed, that only annoyed the old people walking by in the usual way, and didn't shock them the way Blair and Tracy usually did.
They came over to me, and Blair said, "OK, Jordan, when the phone was dead I tried to borrow one from people, but the whole place is full of creeps. No one would let me use theirs. That's why I was pissed."
I chuckled at her naiveté. "Course not."
"Why? I've had to do it before, and it wasn't a problem."
"You look like a boy now -- not a damsel. A boy in distress is just weird -- and suspicious. Why didn't you just wait at the restaurant? You knew we would look there."
"Mr. Friend was in there with that police woman. She's who I'm hiding from, right? He would have probably recognized me, like he did you. And I hate that guy anyway."
"What's so bad about Mr. Friend? I don't even think he'd tell the cop who you are. He didn't rat me out."
"He thinks I should be a total grind because I'm half Chink and half Jewish. An real idiot."
"You're not Jewish, Blair."
"I've told him that, but it won't sink into his tiny brain. I have a Greek grandfather. That's how I got this great nose and curly hair. I've got the look, and that's close enough for him."
Tracy said, "Yeah, Jorie. For you he's just the guy that keeps handing you college catalogues, but for a lot of people he's something else."
Blair said, "I'm starving. Let's go see if he's left the sushi place and, Jordan, I think I did learn something about last night from Jojo. But it's not much."
More to Come.
Hells I was totally stuck, no phone, no ride, no one to help with the disguise, no friends. But enough was enough,...
14: Reports
We trekked through the great caverns of commercialism. Groups of experienced adolescents meandered on the walkways; clots of younger ones milled in the aisles.
Theirs was a different world from mine now. When the MacGuffin was found missing, things had changed for me. My world, my life, my day was now dedicated to securing its return. There could be no normal days until then.
I had been in disguise for over eight hours now and, as I walked behind the core of my crew, it didn't seem I was going to get out of it anytime soon.
Some things had returned to normal, or at least usual.
Tracy hung onto Blair the way she used to -- since Blair looked more like a boy, that didn't draw as many stares as it had in the past.
Blair didn't spend all her time glaring at me, but she didn't let me forget she was angry either, and I still had no clue why.
I walked a few paces behind them, feeling like a third wheel. That wasn't unusual either, and it gave me a chance to think about the case.
When I left the house this morning, I winged it, but I still couldn't think of any better plan. I had hoped that, by talking to people involved, I would stumble upon something, clues. That didn't happen.
But the case had stumbled upon me. I looked behind me, and Bobby and the other kid were still trailing us.
Tracy either nibbled on Blair's ear, or whispered something into it. Blair turned and said, "C'mon, Jord, keep up."
I caught up and said, "Listen, don't call me Jordan - you know - when I'm in disguise. OK?"
Blair's eyes rolled; Tracy's face smiled, and she took my hand while keeping an arm around Blair. That didn't seem to upset Blair.
When we got to the sushi restaurant, Mr. Friend was in the line at the cash register. He was holding onto that police lieutenant as tightly as Tracy held onto Blair.
Tracy started giggling and said, "Ugh! Talk about a weird pair!"
Blair did a quick u-turn which pulled Tracy hand away from mine. Blair grabbed my arm to pull me along, and we went back the way we had come.
The about face had taken Bobby and the other boy by surprise, and we were walking right towards them. Tracy was glaring at them; I tried not to look at them.
The boy that wasn't Bobby said, "Wow, guy, how about letting some of it go around. Don't hog 'em all."
Blair was quick. She pulled both of us closer to her and said, "Yeah, like any of it would drip down to drips like you."
I yanked her arm and started walking faster. I saw Bobby push the other kid away from us too.
Tracy told Blair that they had been following us, and I admitted that one of them was the boy from the bus stop.
Blair took a deep breath and threw her shoulders back. She let Tracy and me go and walked towards the boys.
"Blair! - - Luke. Don't!" I said.
Tracy tried to hold onto her too, but Blair ignored us both. The boys also puffed up when she reached them.
They were out of earshot, but Blair had her arms across her chest and the others shrugged several times before crossing their arms. Blair pointed at Tracy and me, and then Bobby wagged his hands up by his shoulders, and they both backed away.
It was amazing! How could she have done that?
Blair was laughing out loud when she walked back to us.
I said, "Blair - Idiot - you want to get killed? You can't do things like that!"
She kept laughing. "I wasn't going to fight them, Jord. The first thing I told them is that I'm a pacifist. But when I told them you beat up a whole football team already today and were looking for more action, they had heard about that, and got worried."
"Damn it, Blair!"
"Jordan, you know boys don't mind getting beat as much as they mind coming in close with a girl. -- Then I begged them to keep following. I said I'd like to watch your crane kicks in that dress, but they would be in too much pain to enjoy all your beaver shots. That's what got them to leave. They didn't want to entertain me."
"You giant, huge, total asshole."
"Oh, calm down. You're the one that told me to be a boy. Just playing the part." She reached out to take my hand again, and I let her. "Com'on," she said, "your good bud, Friend, should be out of the sushi place by now, and I'll tell you all about the blowjob Jojo almost got last night."
"Who was going to do that?" Tracy asked, but Blair wouldn't answer until we had ordered our food. We had a booth at the back of the restaurant with Blair and Tracy on one bench and me on the other.
"It was two Northfield girls. All Northfield girls want Ferral boys. Didn't you know that?"
"Gugghh, yeah, like," I said.
Blair shrugged. "Anyway something major happened, and it ruined the whole thing."
I said, "He was just talking. No one at Northfield would do that."
"You're such an idiot, Jordan - I mean Hailey. There's a thousand kids there. Do you really think none of them give head? Have sex?"
"No one would do it to them!"
"Jord, you've never even had a class with anyone not in the top percentiles, have you? And high school jingoism is really lame."
"Look. I know a little bit about boys. More than you do, Blair -- Luke, and they were just talking. If a girl nods at them, they would swear she was ready to -- you know."
"I got that, Jord - Hailey." She smirked to show her condescension and her pride at using the right name. "But still there were some girls there with them at least talking, and making plans. Jojo and them were supposed to be working, and Pike started doing something with some kind of pole, moving his hand up and down it. Can you get the picture, Hailey?"
Now it was my turn to look exasperated.
"Well, you've led a sheltered life, I wasn't sure. Anyway, Jojo thought it was the funniest thing that anyone had ever done. And then something happened -- I think the pole hit someone -- that made the whole thing funnier, but then Jojo stopped talking about it. So it must have done some serious damage. If we find a Northfield girl with broken bones or bumps on her head, that will be the one."
I said, "I haven't heard about anyone."
Blair laughed, "You wouldn't have though, the story hasn't reached the honor society yet."
Tracy said, "I haven't either, but you two are the only people I've seen today."
I asked Tracy if she could think of any one who it might have been, and she shook her head. "Lots of people could have talked to them, Jorie. Not everyone thinks Ferral boys are a different species."
I frowned.
Blair said, "Well, these girls were at the country club with someone Pike knew, and something happened, and they all had to take off. That's all I've got for you, Chief Detective, sir."
Our food arrived, and I asked Blair if I could borrow her chopsticks. I had once made the assumption that Blair would never use them - that being too much of an Oriental thing -- so she had always carried a pair with her ever since. She didn't use them for sushi though, she said it was finger food, and I don't like using the freebie ones restaurants had.
When the waitress left, I said, "Maybe, what happened had something to do with the MacGuffin."
Blair shrugged. "Can't see how, but anyway, Kipperman is real pissed at them about it. But not pissed enough to fire them."
She made a grab for a piece of my dragon roll, and I stabbed at her hand with the chopsticks. She said, "You always get more than you eat, Hailey."
"Not my tail, jerk," I put a piece from the middle on her plate. "And I'd eat more if you didn't always steal half of mine."
"Na-uh. You never eat much. Now we all know it's because you're so worried about your sexy figure." She said it with a smirk.
I felt her shoe rubbing my calf. I don't know what was with that, and I pulled my legs up onto the bench. "Just shut the F up!" I said, "Maybe I buy extra for you."
Tracy said, "OK. So anyway I bet I can get Jojo to tell me more about what happened maybe. He'll probably be at the park later tonight. Do ya'll want to go there after the game?"
Neither Blair nor I answered her, but that wasn't because I thought it was a bad idea. As she usually does, Tracy took silence as agreement, and said, "But we should probably get going, it's almost eight. I'm going to be late."
Blair said, "I'll get a bus and see you there."
I didn't want to be hanging out at my school alone while Tracy was with the cheerleaders. I thought having someone around who was in on it made the disguise work better. "Why can't you just ride with us, Blair?"
"I don't want to be stuck behind the seat in that little car, Jordan. And I wouldn't be a gentleman if I made you sit there, would I?"
I rolled my eyes. "I'll sit in back, or we could just share a seat, Blair. It isn't far. I'll try not to contaminate you."
"You'd sit in my lap?"
"I don't care, or you can sit on mine, but I think I weigh less."
"Nah. That's OK. I always thought your male ego wouldn't let you sit on a girl's lap."
Tracy burst out laughing so loudly that people from other tables stared at us.
"Yeah. Guess that was really a dumb thing to think, huh?" Blair got another opportunity to sneer.
I started to say, "Fuck You!" but I couldn't get my voice to work. Instead I turned side ways on in the booth and pulled my knees up to my chin.
I heard Blair snort, then she whispered, or snarled, "Jordan, at least watch how you're sitting!"
I looked down and my feet were hiding everything, but I pushed my hem between my legs and held it in place with my thighs.
Tracy leaned forward across the table and said, "Jordie . . ."
I interrupted. "Call me Hailey, please, Trace."
"OK. Hail, you need to buy some new panties too before you change into those shorts."
Blair laughed some more.
I said, "I don't even know the right size. I just got some of my sister's that fit."
Blair said, "Yeah, he has them all separated into what fits, and loves trying them all on over and over rather than looking at the labels."
This time it wasn't hard to speak. "Shut the Fuck up!"
Tracy said, "C'mon. Don't guys. Here, let me look, Jor -- Hailey." She moved over to my side of the booth, and making sure she was blocking the view, lifted up my dress and looked at the label on the side of the patties."
Blair kept laughing.
I said, "What is your problem now?!"
"You two have gotten real close! You let her examine your privates now?"
Tracy reacted faster than I did. "She's my BFF, Blair. So leave her alone. And she is real nice to you too."
"How convenient, Jordan. And now you're going to change outfits so you can collect more best friends too. Gawd, you are Little-Miss-Popular-Little-Witch."
I pushed Tracy off the bench. "Blair. . ."
She interrupted me. "Call me Luke or Lou when I'm in disguise. Someone might think I'm a girl." And, of course, she smirked while she said it.
"Lou! I'm just doing this for the Macguffin." I reached into my purse and pulled out my wad of bills and threw them on the table. I thought it was about sixteen dollars, more than my share. "I know you don't give of Gee Dee about it, even though the cops are after you, so thanks for the info about Jojo. I bet it helps a frigging lot. I'll find another way to the school, or I'll just go home. Have some head."
I pushed the last piece of my eel towards her and walked out of the restaurant, fast.
Hells I was totally stuck, no phone, no ride, no one to help with the disguise, no friends. But enough was enough, and I didn't want to be around Blair any more. For about twenty minutes she had almost acted almost human. I guess that was her limit. A five year friendship screwed. What a waste! F-ing stupid Bitch
Did she really think I was dressed like this just for fun? Did she really think I liked it? And what was that to her if I did??
Then I saw that Bobby kid coming towards me again! Double SHIT I went down an escalator and at the bottom turned to see him getting onto it. I took a left and a right, and I was in the food court. I headed toward the bathroom corridor.
There were three women going into the lady's room, and I didn't want to follow them. I turned around; the creep was still behind me - in the hallway.
He kept coming towards me and said, "I'm supposed to tell . . ."
I swung my purse hard and fast right between his legs.
"UgAh . . .ack wants to talk to you. . . is all. aaaghh."
"Like I give a fuck?" He was bent over and I almost gave him a two handed chop on the back of his neck but decided he wasn't worth it.
Someone touched my shoulder. I jumped and spun around.
"Don't hit me!!" Tracy yelled, and took me in a hug.
I pushed her away. "I thought we talked about that, Trace."
"Girls can hug, Hailey!! And you neeeed it! And we're BFF's, right? Everything isn't always something else."
I shook my head and leaned into her arms.
"Didn't you learn not to go around alone earlier!?"
"I can take care of myself."
She giggled and said, "I can see that." Bobby was still bent over; we ignored him. "But we can't have you tearing up the whole town, can we?"
She led me into the food court and to a table at the back.
"Where's Blair?" I asked.
"I left her to pay the bill. She wanted to run after you too, but I stopped her. I barely saw you head down the escalator. You could have got lost, dumb duck."
"That was the idea. I'm really OK. Trace, don't abandon Blair. She's the one having a problem."
"Yeah, well I don't get that either. But don't go off alone, Jordan, really."
"Yes, mommy," I said; she slapped the top of my head. I saw Bobby come out of the corridor. He walked away from us as quickly as he could walk, which wasn't as quickly as he normally could.
"But you left Blair alone," I said.
"Yeah, I need to call her."
"Her phone's dead, remember?"
"Oh. We've got to find her. She's going to be near one of the bathrooms, and PO'd because she can't go in."
"How do you know that's where she'll be?"
"Because that's where girls go to cry! That's where you were going, isn't it?"
I hadn't even realized that that was where I was going the whole time, and it wasn't because I didn't want to be seen in there, but because I didn't want those women to offer help, that I'd turned around.
In spite of that realization, I said, "I wasn't crying, and I don't want to see her."
"Sure you weren't, Jorie." She started trying to lift my dress.
"Tracy! What!"
"I don't have any sleeves, girl. Just bend over some." She put her fingers on my face and showed me the wet makeup that had come off onto them.
"Well -- anyway, I don't want that on my new dress, do I?!"
"Will you stay right here? Not move? Don't run away."
I nodded.
"And not beat up any more boys?"
I let my shoulders droop in response.
15: Lessons
I thought she was going to go look for Blair, but she just went over to the condiments rack to get some napkins. It didn't matter because Blair came into the court laden with all of our shopping bags, and she had two other people with her.
Tracy jogged over to her and stopped her from coming to my table. I felt really stupid, stuck in place, and knowing they, including the strangers, were all talking about me.
Then one of the new people looked over and waved, and I recognized Quinn, the clerk from the Hotz'n store. I waved back, and he and his friend came over.
"So, Hailey, I hear you're being a real drama queen today. Way to go, girl!" Q had a big smile and made that sound like it was a very good thing.
"I am not!"
"Lou told us you were. He was looking for someone to look in the women's rooms for you."
"She's the one that's having the issues, Q. Really."
Q's friend said, "Who? That girl? She's the only one not all distraught."
"No. Not her. Blair - Luke."
The stranger said, "You kids all have too, too many names. And too, too many pronouns too."
They weren't more than three or four years older than me. The new one's gender was even more obscure than Q's. That had seemed almost impossible before, but was even harder now because Q was wearing an ankle length skirt, a red satin choker with Wedgewood sort of cameo pin, and a baggy black band T along with blue eye shadow, lots of bangles, and long ear rings.
The other one just had on some bell bottom hip jeans with sequins on the seams and a bright red polo. The only jewelry she wore was a gold link bracelet and tiny ear studs, and she only had light eye makeup and pink lipstick. She also had a stud in her tongue, but I didn't see that until later.
Q had shoulder length brown hair in flat pony tail. The other one's hair was shorter, blonde, and had yellower tiger stripes painted into it that could only be seen close up.
Yet Q's friend looked more feminine than Q, and they both looked like they wanted everyone to wonder, rather than to automatically accept them as girls, but few would have risked embarrassment by asking.
Q said, "Dasein, this is my new bud, Hailey. And don't you give her any stuff, OK? Hailey, this is Dasein. Dasein doesn't believe in pronouns ever, by the way. Whichever you use for Dasein, Dasein will get mad at you." Then Q pretended to whisper and added, "I always, always use girl ones for her though. She is almost all girl always."
They took seats on both sides of me and Q said, "So, new buddy, what is all the drama, huh?"
"Long - long - long story! Right now it is just all the grief she's giving me about how I'm dressed."
"Some of that comes with the territory, girl. If they're not spitting and hitting, it's not as bad as it could be." Q was rubbing my back while she said that.
I leaned forward and put my hands over my face. "No! It's different. We've been friends for forever and it's just me -- not everyone. You know her, she doesn't hate you, right? Never mind. Forget it."
Dasein said, "OK. So, then why do you call Lou 'her'. Just look, that's a 'he', if you've got to use a pronoun."
"Nah, I talked her into going out like that."
"Then how come you get to do that? If someone wants to be a she, why do you get to force them to not be a she?"
I said, "It's not like that. She needs a disguise, and she always dresses like a guy anyway. OK?"
"If Blair wants to be a guy, then why did you say 'she'."
"Look -- it's, it's --. . ."
Q had been watching both of us intently, now he chuckled and said, "OK, Das, that's enough for lesson one. Hailey is still a raw recruit and now isn't a good time."
"That isn't what the problem is anyway," I said, "It's her that can't deal with me, nothing about how she's dressed."
Dasein rolled her head back and stared at the ceiling. Q was still stroking my back, and said, "Are you real sure Lou is a she? I know what you mean about the clothes, and I've known Lou for a while, but not inside his head."
"I've known her for forever. She always tries to look like a boy, but then wears jewelry and makeup and stuff. And get's mad if you say she is a boy."
Dasein said, "So why isn't she wearing any of that today?"
"I told you. She needs to be disguised, like I do. She doesn't have a hard time getting away with it. OK?"
Tracy had just come over, and she said, "She doesn't do it that well though, Jord. Even without the earrings and makeup, Jojo thought she was a trannie or something. Listen, I'm late. I really need to be at the stadium. Please, come with us. Please, Jordie."
I shook my head. "Not with Blair, Trace. I'll just take the bus. Go ahead. I'll see you there."
"Blair won't leave without you. And I'm not leaving you alone either, not when you're being followed. Please."
Q said, "You already have a stalker? It isn't someone who read you, is it?"
"No. Just some kid that saw me near your shop, and then showed up here. I think I've chased him off. It will be OK."
"I'll give you a ride. And you do need to stay in a group, girl. Don't take chances. There are people in the world who don't like you already."
I looked at Tracy, and she looked at me. I didn't know these weird people well enough to get in a car with them, but I didn't want to insult them. Tracy was thinking the same thing and didn't know what to say either.
Q read our minds. He said, "Blair knows me. Will you take her word that I'm OK?"
After talking to Blair, Tracy relayed her approval. She made me promise that I'd be at the scrimmage and go to the park with them. Then she gave me a peck on the mouth before she left.
Dasein said, "Maybe your new buddy isn't such a creep after all, Quinn. At least Hailey has friends."
I said, "Thanks a lot," but Das ignored me because the comment hadn't been made to me.
Q said, "Let's go and get you fixed up and hit the road." He stood me up and led me towards the restrooms.
I guess I was felling a little better, like I was back among friends again.
I headed for the lady's room though I wasn't sure it was the right place, but they went into one of the family restrooms.
Q said, "They pretend these are for handicapped and for mothers who don't want their kids in the men's room alone, but they really build them to keep us from freaking out the zombies."
That was obvious now. I said, "And a great place to change into super hero outfits too!"
"Absolutely!" Das said, "And we do have super powers, you know. So, Hailey, how long have you been dressing?"
This morning I hadn't known what that meant. I said, "I've only done it a few times. I don't much."
"Bull. When was the first time? And not just going out, hanging at home too."
"Does loving wearing my sister's princess costumes count."
"Depends on when you stopped."
"Eight - nine, maybe."
Dasein said, "Why did you stop? Why did you start again?"
I sighed and said, "I don't know. Really, I don't want to trick you into thinking I'm something I'm not. I don't really do this all the time. It's just a disguise for today, I always wear baggies and black Ts and baseball caps. The boy uniform."
Q said, "Alright just knock it off, Das. She doesn't need the inquisition from us."
"Oh, stop being so butch Q. I'm not asking Hailey about self image, just about costumes. I'd just like to know how Hailey feels about it.
"See why I almost use male pronouns for Q, Hailey?"
Q said, "I'm not being butch! I'm being a bitch. Knock it off. We don't have an enlistment interview."
"Can I ask Hailey about the reasons for the disguises and what the fight with Blair was about, Captain Q? Hailey, I'm not judging. I'm just curious. I won't ask if you're a girl or not. Those distinctions are bunk anyway."
"That was the question that Blair kept asking me over and over. Bitch."
Q was opening my purse to get my makeup, and I got it out for him. Das had taken a seat on the countertop next to the sink and sat with her ankle on her knee playing with the straps on her sandals.
Q said, "See, Hailey, if you're trying to pass, you will do fine with a lot less makeup than you had on this afternoon. Some gen-girls wear so much that people think they're boys trying to hide."
"Well, isn't that what I am?"
"I don't know, but you don't want to look like that's what you are. Or do you?"
Das said, "Do you really try to live as total boy, Hailey?"
"That wasn't one of the approved questions, Das."
"I do OK. I'm not that fem. No one looks at me and thinks, 'Is that a boy or a girl?'"
Das said, "But you could get them to wonder that with just a little bit of effort, you know!"
I chuckled. Q had a damp towel and started to wipe my face, and I tried to take the rag.
Q said, "Hey! Don't be so selfish that you turn down help. That's rude."
Das said, "Let it be, Hailey. Q's an artist."
I let Q wash my face. Then Q took some tweezers from his bag and aimed them at my eyebrows. I jumped back.
"Just a few," he said, and I gave in.
Das said, "You don't really mean you never get crap going about as a boy, do you?"
"Everyone gets crap. I do change for PE on the back row."
Q asked, "Are the AFZ signs still up?"
"Yeah." The story was that in ancient times someone had painted 'FZ' on the doors of some of the school's boy's rooms and on the wall of the back row of the locker room. They meant it to stand for 'fag zone', and to keep all those deemed weird from the other areas. Someone else added an 'A' to make it stand for 'asshole free zone'.
"Q claims he is the one who added the 'A'. It's his greatest exploit."
"Did both of you go to Northfield?"
"Yep," Q said, "don't worry, Hail, high school does end. I bet you haven't put any disinfectant on your new piercings yet, have you? By the way, I love that dress. You have my permission to wear it, even though it hides the work I did on you bellybutton."
"Ohhh. Tracy took my other clothes. I was supposed to change so this boy could see that."
Das said, "You have a boyfriend too?!"
"Not a boyfriend. Just a friend who's a boy."
"Just a friend-who's-a-boy that knows you dress and is interested in your navel. You kids sure have it easier than we did."
"I was interested in your bellybutton, Das."
"Hailey said it's a boy, Q."
"It's not really like that. Andy's only a friend."
Q said, "You're pushing her into things again, Das. OK, Hailey, do your mascara and one touch of blush on each side, but that is all I'll permit."
"We still haven't heard your excuse for going about dressed today, Hailey."
After I did my eyes, I said, "Have you heard about the MacGuffin?"
Das said, "Well, 'course. It's a big deal around here."
But neither of them had heard that the MacGuffin had been stolen. I told them the whole long story. When I was done Das said, "Hail, you don't really have any evidence that Kipperman took the MacGuffin. All you know is that he is trying to protect someone, and throwing the police off the track."
"Maybe, I guess. But it's my best lead."
"Have you thought of looking around in the shed at the country club?"
"But I saw him moving it this morning. I wish I had had time to look at the cop's computer for longer. Hey!" I had an inspiration, or a premonition. "Could you write something on the mirror for me, and don't tell me which one of you wrote it."
I told them the password the policeman had given me for his DayOS-X Makina and faced the wall. When I turned around it was written in lipstick. I added today's date and then wiped it off.
Q said, "You aren't a wiccan, are you? Are we caught in a spell now?"
"Not to worry," I said, "if it is, it's a good spell, and you're safe because I don't know who wrote it."
Das said, "I think the shed would be his best hiding place because, if it were found there, he could blame it on his peons. That's where I would have left it."
"It would be good to look around in there," I said, "but it's kept locked."
"And it has an alarm system too," Q said, "but there's a big hole in the back wall. One of the pieces of metal siding is loose, and his workers use it when he is late."
"How do you know?"
"Q used to work for the guy," Dasein said.
Q said, "And, believe me, I wouldn't mind seeing him busted."
"I heard he only hired jocks."
Das giggled.
Q said, "Well, yeah, I happen to have once been the best point guard the Northfield Vikings ever had."
"Yeah. They went eight and twelve under Q's leadership -- a really great dribbler - with a basketball, and with a water glass. The problem was both the forwards would jump ten feet backwards every time Q made a pass."
"Shut up, Das. You're being a bitch again," Q said.
"That does it, butchy-boss; I'm using boy pronouns for you from now on, Quentin." Das stuck out her tongue at him.
Q stuck his tongue out too and batted his eyes. It wasn't a very masculine response. "Like I would care," he said.
Someone jiggled the door handle, and Q said, "We better move out. Do either of you need to use the facilities? It will be a long time before we're near a private one again."
With a ton of emphasis on the 'he', Das said, "OH! HE's being all motherly! I'm good. Hailey can go into a girl's room without getting a glance, and you can just pee on a tree. Let us go then, you and I."
I said, "When the evening is spread out against the sky."
Das said, "See, the kids still learn things at that school, Q."
"I think Hailey is wicked smart, Das. We can't measure by her; think about my kid-sib."
I said, "I kind of am! But so are a lot of us in the next generation. So how old are you old betties? Eighty? Seventy?"
Q said, "I'm twenty; Das is still a teenager. It's not the years; it's the experiences."
"I'm humbled by your world weary wisdom." I tried to take Q's hand because that now seemed the normal way to walk through a mall, at least when in a dress, but Q yanked his arm away and began walking faster.
I thought I'd offended him, but when we were in the parking garage, and there were no others around, he put his arm across my shoulders. He said, "Hail, you're under eighteen, we're old folks. No contact in public. Some people like to make grief for freaks."
"And we wouldn't do well in jail," Das said, and she took my hand on the other side.
I said, "You guys aren't freaks!"
Q said, "The zombies don't know that."
Das said, "You call me a guy again, and I'll freak all over you!"
"Sorry."
Q said, "It's OK, Hailey. She won't really. She'll just pout for hours."
Das got into the back seat of Q's car with me, and said "OK. Now let's talk about your friend, Blair."
I groaned. Q said, "Let her be, Das."
"No. I have an insight into this. And if I'm right, Hailey will feel horrible about not realizing what's happening."
I said -- alright, I moaned it, "What is your insight?"
"Nope, we're doing this socratically. So when did this Blair start giving you grief?"
"Last night, when she was in my room."
"After you had been dressed at the park? And what else happened between the park and your room."
"Nothing." She just stared at me, so I added, "I had to ride in Tracy's lap on the way home. Tracy started flirting with me and kissed me when I got out, and that made Blair all jealous, I guess."
"You mean she has something with that girl, but the girl started flirting with you?"
"That's just what Tracy does, and Blair knows that. She also knows that I'm not after Trace. Plus I talked Tracy into stopping, and Blair just kept up her stuff."
"OK. Next, you say Blair always dresses in boy's clothes, but wears makeup and jewelry. Why does Blair do that, Hailey?"
"How could I know? She just likes the look."
"Does Blair envy male genderqueers and want to look like one? Or do you think maybe Blair wants to be trannie girl, a boy-to-girl trannie, but was born in a girl's body? All things are possible."
"I don't know!!" I was sort of moaning still, maybe whining by now.
"Is Blair really a girl or a fem-to-male?"
"She gets mad if you say that, but she always says that about others. I didn't used to think she had a thing about transsexuals, or how people dressed, 'til now. I don't still, except me."
"I don't think that's it. Umm. But you made Blair go out and try to pass as a boy, right?"
"I guess."
Q said, "Das..."
Das interrupted him. "No. This is important, Q."
"OK. Look, it's all because I asked her to go out as a boy, but she made me go out as a girl, and I haven't done that as much as she has. And she is mad about Tracy, but I don't think she is really gay, and Tracy says she isn't doing the things she wants, and that shows she isn't gay. But if she was wouldn't that make her mad at Trace, not me! And why is it my clothes she always attacks?"
Q got into the act now, even though he had tried to stop Dasein. "Slow down, girl. I can't keep up. She has a girl friend, but she isn't gay. And it is important to you that she isn't gay. You better figure out why that's important. Then she says she is all girl, but you think she wants to look like a boy, though she doesn't really try."
"She ties up her breast, and you said you thought she was a boy, Q."
"No I didn't, Hailey. There are female genderqueers, love. They aren't all F-to-M's. And I pick pronouns by presentation."
It was Das's turn. "And, Hailey, you say you don't get huge amounts of crap when you present as all boy."
"Not as much as some. I go to the AFZ's because I don't like the assholes. They make it uncomfortable but don't chase me out of the other rooms. But now with both ears pierced, I'll have to."
Q said, "Polish your nails, wear mascara and eyeliner now and then. You'll like the way it messes with their pointed little heads."
Das kept going. "And you get hit on by Blair's girlfriend and pick up a stalker as soon as you're dressed, and would have fooled me if Q hadn't told me about you. Are there other nice things about being a girl, Hailey?"
I didn't say anything; I just bit on my lip.
"But you say Blair always looks a like a boy."
"She could try not to so much. Tracy said she didn't do that well at passing as a boy."
Das said, "Geez-us, Hailey, have you looked in a mirror today? And you have a boyfriend, and could have a girlfriend, and can be a boy. I almost detest you, and I haven't been your friend for years. And then you go and tell her she looks like a boy too."
"I wasn't trying to be mean to her."
Q said, "We know that. Looks fuck with everyone. And, even when you don't think everything is black and white, like the zombies do, sometimes you miss some of the shades that exist in reality."
Das said, "And it's not all grays either! There are rainbows! Splendid spectra! Great blast of color everywhere! They think the world is achromatic. We've got to shock them into seeing all the colors!! -- Now cheer up. You're not evil, only a bit clueless, which is OK when you're new to something. I bet Blair can't explain anything either. Plus, Q'll get uber-pissed if you mess up your makeup again."
I smiled a little bit. We had just pulled into the parking lot at the stadium, and Q parked the car.
"Are we staying, Q?"
"I think it's almost over," I said. I hoped they would stay. Even dealing with Das's questions was better than watching football, and Blair would have a harder time being mean with them there.
Q said, "We might as well. Little-sib is going to call for a ride soon, and it's not like we have a life."
Das wasn't so worried about the zombies here because she took my hand as we walked across the parking lot,
I spotted Tracy's car - they were here, - and there were two red pick-ups in the lot too, one was right next to Andy's car. That didn't mean Kipperman was at the scrimmage, however. Even if both were his, he might have let some Northfield players use them like he did Jojo.
When we were halfway to the gate I said, "Das, so how do I make up to Blair for being me?"
Das said, "You don't, but seeing what's happening sometimes helps. For now just hang on and go for the ride."
16: Games
Mr. Friend was standing by the gate, and for the first time in a while I became self-conscious about my dress. I kept smoothing it down until Q grabbed my free hand, so I was holding both his and Das's when I got to the gate.
Mr. Friend didn't seem bothered by my clothes at all. He had a huge grin on his face as I walked up. He said, "Hello, Jordan. Glad you made it."
Blair and Tracy are way too hard on him. He's never been anything but kind and cheerful to me.
I said, "Yeah. Sorry I'm so late. You wanted to tell me something?"
"Yes, but not right now. I'm real busy. It's nothing bad, really, but it's going to have to wait until the game is over, OK?"
"Sure. No problem."
"Good. You're riding home with Andy, aren't you? We can talk while he's getting changed."
He didn't wait for an answer, but turned to Q and Das and said, "You two can't come in. Sorry."
Das said, "But Mr. Friend, we're old alums, here to cheer the grand old Vikings to victory!"
"It's an intrasquad scrimmage. Only students, parents, and Vikings Boosters are allowed to watch. I don't imagine you are paid up athletic supporters."
Das said, "I'm certainly not!"
"Can we make sure Hailey's friends are here?" Q asked. "And I'm waiting for my sister, Mr. Friend."
"Wait in your car. He knows lots of people here, and he has a ride."
After Q and Das left, I went to the bleachers. Tracy was easy to find; she was on the sideline with the other cheerleaders. Even though they weren't doing any cheers, she was chained to the group by peer pressure and only waved when she heard me calling her. I saw Andy sitting on the bench too, but he was to far away for me to get his attention.
Blair was harder to find even though the stands were almost empty. I eventually saw her sitting in the upper part with two boys. When I got closer I recognized them as Jojo and Hancock. That was a shock for a lot of reasons, but she seemed to be doing fine talking to them. I guess they could have climbed the fence to get in, and I thought about reporting them for spying on our team, but they weren't actually watching anyway, and it didn't seem worth the added grief.
I sat down in the lower part of the bleachers. Some of the biggest, dumbest cretins in school were out there smashing into each other at full speed in about a hundred pounds of armor. It should have been more fun to watch than it was.
Less than five minutes later, a gang of boys move closer to me, and and I left. Such a pain! The one best thing about being a boy is being able to be out in public alone!
I was going to go to the girl's room and hide out, but when I was passing the snack bar I got another surprise, Sydney and Lori were running it, and they were wearing spirit club t-shirts. There weren't any people there, and as I passed Lori said, "So we meet again. You following us?"
"Nah, must be fate. You know - sorry to say it - but you don't seem the spirit club type."
Lori snickered, as I had suspected she would. Sydney said, "Just doing our part to be good citizens and active members of the school community."
"Oh. If you say so." Somehow that was worth a snicker too.
"So,why are you here if you go to Southlake, huh?" Lori asked.
I didn't think I had told them I went there -- or led them to think it -- I hadn't told anyone that, but I'd let that Bobby brat believe I did.
I said, "Meeting friends. Is that OK?"
"It's fine by us. Just asking is all."
"You haven't heard any more MacGuffin news, have you?"
"Umm-No. There do seem to be a lot of people looking though," Syd said.
"Oh? Who?"
"Some boys we know where talking about it."
I said, "I guess it is a big deal. You know what? I heard there was a girl that got hurt real badly last night too; a pole fell on her or something. Did you hear about it?"
Lori came as close to a real laugh as she ever did and said, "No. I heard about a boy who broke a window with his wang though."
I faked a laugh and tried to act interested. "Oh? Who did that?"
"It's a long story," Sydney said.
Lori said, "But not as long as the wang."
Sydney gave Lori a 'shut up' look.
"Oh yeah, sounds like a good story." I said.
Lori snickered. Sydney said, "Might tell it someday. You want a drink?"
I opened my bag, and remembered that I'd thrown all my cash onto the table at the restaurant.
Syd said, "Umm, not to worry." She handed me a cup of soda and told me to go over and get a fairly clean one from the trash barrel.
She stuck the dirty cup onto a stack behind the counter. "They just inventory the cups, you see. They can't really keep track of the liquid."
Lori said, "We save those for special people. We don't get paid or a tip jar. See?"
"I'll pay you back for the tip. Promise."
"No need," Sydney said, "We still got the cups for our take. Now an extra person will get a special cup."
I already knew not to mess with high school kids that work fast food, and I knew that Lori and Sydney weren't the most principled people around. There wasn't any way I was going to change that right now. But I knew they did have their own sort of standards and code.
I carried the drink to a table and sat on the empty patio listening to the crowd noise. I tried to think about the MacGuffin case or about anything besides the clothes I was wearing.
They were fine until I started thinking about Blair. Going out like this had been stupid. It had gotten me into the worse fight I'd ever had. It had gotten Andy's hand broken. It had drawn a pack of boys to tail me. It had ruined a friendship. I wished I'd just let the cops throw me in jail. I wished I could just rip the thing off.
But was Dasein really right about this? Blair was really cute. She tried not to look like a girl, or she would look great. She just always had had problems with girl's clothes and with me. She had to see that what I'd done today was necessary, didn't she?.
Still, what Das had said was an explanation; the only one I could think of. The second I saw Blair, I'd apologize for suggesting she go out as a boy, and I'd promise her I'd never, never dress again, and I'd tell her I was taking out all my new studs as soon as I got home too. It would show that I was trying. It wasn't worth losing her. Even though she was a bitch, it wasn't worth it.
Syd and Lori spent some time chuckling and snorting behind the counter, then Lori came over with a rag to wipe down the tables and said, "So, who you waiting for?"
"Blair and some other people. She's up in the stands with two boys I don't want to have to deal with. So I'll wait 'til after the game. I don't really like watching it."
"Me neither, too violent, you know. I saw her. She was with Jojo and Bill Hancock earlier. Is that who you don't want to see?
I nodded.
"Say, you aren't the girl they had the fight with, are you?"
I closed my eyes and nodded again. I didn't want fame for that.
"Hey, Sydney, this is who beat up Pike!"
"Hum, Interesting. I guess that explains a lot."
"It's wild. They're real mad at us right now too."
"Oh, what happened?" Talking to them was better than setting alone going over all my troubles.
Syd came out from behind the counter. "We were supposed to meet them with some booze. But the girl that sold it to us ripped us off."
Lori said, "She says it got swiped. But we got some of her stuff that we're keeping until she pays up."
"Oh," I said.
Mr. Friend came out of the tunnel from the grandstands and said, "OK. This thing is almost over. Let's get ready for the rush, girls. There aren't very many people here but get a dozen cups ready. -- Oh hi, Jordan. We will talk in a bit."
He went out the other side of the patio, towards the parking lot. Syd and Lori went behind the counter and started filling cups with ice.
There was a bang, then a roar from overhead. "Here they come," Lori yelled.
The eight cheerleaders charged into the snack area, leading the crowd. They lined up, and Lori and Syd handed each one a soft drink and took their money. I wondered which ones were getting the used cups, probably all of them. Most of the others customers were too old to be students.
When Tracy saw me, she ran over and yelled, "This is my new friend, Hailey, everyone!"
A lot of the girls waved or smiled and kept talking to each other. One came over and said, "Well she only looks half as weird as that person you found this summer, did you finally realize what Blair is?
Tracy said, "Oh, and what do you think Blair is, Heth?"
"Everyone knows she is a dyke, and we were starting to wonder about you."
I said, "Oh, and how do you know what Blair is?"
"Just look at her sometime!"
Tracy laughed and said, "Are you having those strange dreams again, Heather? Sorry, you're out of luck, you're not Blair's type."
Heather turned me and said, "Why would anyone do that to their hair? Are you one those good friends of Blair's too?"
Tracy said, "I love Hailey's hair! It's wonderful! Hailey, come on. She doesn't know anything about Blair, but everyone knows what Heather is."
Heather said, "Well, you keep staying around girl's like that, and Andy'll start wondering about you too, I bet."
"Heather, you're not Andy's type either. So, don't bother your little head about it."
Jojo came into the snack area. If he wasn't supposed to be at this game, it didn't worry him much. He said, "Hey, Tracey, I've got a message for you."
I turned to walk away, but he saw me and said, "Hey, wait. You Andy's new girl friend, aren't you! I want to tell you something too."
Just what I needed! Now the asshole had started a new problem.
Heather heard him. She squealed and said, "Andy has already dumped you! Ha! We knew he would sooner or later."
Tracy said, "Heather, I told you, you aren't Andy's type. Maybe, he didn't dump me, and we're a ménage á trois, and you'll have to just keep dreaming."
"Eww, that's just gross! Jojo, come on. You don't need these creeps."
"Uhh, some other time, Heather. I'm in a hurry."
Once she was gone, Jojo said, "Hailey, right? Look, I'm sorry about this afternoon. We were being jerks on purpose, and it got out of hand. I really didn't want that to happen."
I hate it when assholes apologize. His words came no where close to making up for what had happened, but now I had to be conciliatory too. "I guess I overreacted, Jojo. Andy said I did."
"No you didn't. Who would think even Pike would have done that. I mean kicking you, not just the shit he did to Andy. I thought I could control him, but I can't any more. He will pay, Hailey. I promise."
"OK. -- umm -- Look, Jojo, if you want to make it up, could you tell me what you know about the MacGuffin. Some of my friends are in trouble about that, and they didn't do anything."
It isn't that I trusted him, but even his lies might give me something to go on, and if I had to act nice with him I thought that question could make him squirm a little but, if he squirmed at all, it didn't show.
"I really, really don't know anything about it. Look, all that talk was just to get under your and Andy's skin. And some people thought we took it too. I just hope they find it real soon."
"But you were at the club and something happened, right?"
"The only thing that happened was Pike again. He was farting around with one of the pruning poles while we were trimming a tree, and he broke a window. Then we got the hell out of there. That's all. We're all going to lose at least two week's wages.
"Listen, Hancock is waiting for me, and we need to catch someone before he leaves. Are you'll going to the park? I'll see you there, but that's really all I can tell you. We would help if we could. The thing with Andy's hand sucks huge."
"I might go there."
"'K. So, Tracy, that Luke guy wanted me to tell you, he's waiting at your car. He doesn't want to come down here for some reason."
I said, "He's super-pissed at me. I've made lots of enemies today."
"Not me you haven't, Hailey. Are you really Andy's new girl friend?
I said, "I don't know."
Then Tracy piped in, louder than necessary to make sure everyone heard her. "Yes, she is! And I can't even hold it against Andy. Look at what I lost out to! I love her even though she stole me boyfriend."
Jojo said, "So, Tracy, you really are free now."
"It looks like it for a little while, Joe. But I don't want to start something on the rebound. OK? It wouldn't work, even though you aren't so bad."
He laughed. "Wow! Such praise, I'll remember it always, Trace. You must be something, Hailey. If you get tired of Andy, we'll talk, OK?"
I laughed - OK, it sounded like a giggle - but didn't answer. After he left, Tracy said, "See, I told you he wasn't horrible, just real full of himself like most boys and all jocks."
"Trace, why did you tell people I'm going with Andy? I can't hang out at school like this."
"Jorie, you and Andy deserve the chance. It doesn't have to be for long. If I'm back with Andy in a month, no one will think twice about it. You can go to a couple of dances with him. Don't you want to do that?"
"Oh, Tracy. I don't know."
I didn't know! I liked being with Andy now, but I didn't want to be that kind of friend with Andy at all, but he couldn't be seen with me as my regular self, and --And I had decided not to go out dressed ever again because of Blair. But. -- But, anyway, that was a minor problem compared to the others I had. I could just disappear, and it wouldn't be hard for Andy to explain that.
"I need to get changed," Tracy said. "Do you want to ride with us? I'll get Blair to cool her little jets."
"No, I've got to wait for my new boyfriend you told everyone about, don't I? And I still haven't talked to Mr. Friend. But tell Blair that I'm sorry for asking her to go out like a boy, and that I'm never going to wear clothes like these again."
"No, Jorie!"
"It's not that important, Trace. Can't we be girl friends, even when I dress like a boy?"
"Yeah. Yeah, of course we can! But - OK - it's for Blair, isn't it? I'll tell her you said that."
The second there was no one in line, Lori pulled the shutters down on the snack bar. Four minuets later they were on their way out, and the patio was abandoned. I went to look for Mr. Friend.
I saw him standing next to Jojo's pick-up so I waited at the gate. He must have been reading them the riot act, because it took a long time. Then he went and talked to a cop sitting in a cruiser at the back of the lot, and to a second one sitting in a car on the street near the exit. I guess at a real game they would have been busy with crowd and traffic control, but tonight they had nothing to do.
He came past me almost trotting and, without stopping, he said, "Not yet, Jordan. I have to check on the snack bar. Look for me there in five or ten minutes, and you better make sure you don't miss Andy."
I went over to the locker room door. There were nine girls waiting for boys on the team, four of them were cheerleaders, including Heather, and as soon as she saw me she said, "There she is. That's the girl that Andy dumped Tracy for!"
I just stopped; I didn't know what to expect, but it seemed like Heather expected the others to stone me or something. Instead there was a chorus of hi's and three girls, two of whom knew me in my other clothes, told me their names.
I said, "Hi. I'm Hailey," and that was all the time I had before the locker room door burst open and the boys poured out, and I was being introduced to the players.
Andy came out in the middle of a big crowd, and one of the boys said, "Andy, why didn't you tell us you had some new puttie! -- Just kidding! Just kidding!"
Andy looked shocked, then he saw me and looked happy. "Get some couth, Thompson. And I've had other things on my mind tonight. You know - Football! Now, I have time for other things though."
He put his arms around me and kissed me on my mouth. I knew I had to let him to keep up the act. He didn't try to french me though, though some of the boys had their girl friends. He whispered, "I've wanted to do that so long!" And act or no act, I hit him on top of his head and pushed him away. That backfired. It gave him a smile, and got me a cheer.
One of the boys said, "But she's from Southlake, Andy. We might need to look into your loyalty to the Vikings."
Andy said, "Does Southlake have a football team? I don't think so."
I said, "They do too!"
Which got eight yells of, "They suck," and three shouts of their last year's record.
A boy said, "Southie girls are great for doing your homework though."
One of the cheerleaders, who was hanging on to the running back's arm, said, "Well, we think you're a traitor still, Andy. And we all hate you!" Then she semi-whispered to me, "We won't take it out on you though, you lucky witch. Lunch sometime, OK?"
"'K, I just got a new phone. I'll give you the number next time." Like there would ever be one. I was tugging on Andy's arm; I didn't know how long I could keep this up.
Andy said, "Bye all, Hailey is kind of shy, and wants to see me alone."
"Whoooooo!" said at least one voice in each of the five octaves.
"And I think we all did pretty good tonight, no matter what Coach says."
A few people said, "Thanks, Andy, See ya'." One said, "Don't do any thing I wouldn't do, if you can think of something like that." Another said, "Don't do anything I would do!"
I was pulling Andy towards the snack bar, and he said, "Where are we going, and how the hell did that happen?? Not that I mind."
"I still haven't talked to Mr. Friend yet, and I don't know. That Jojo said something stupid in front of Heather, and then Tracy wanted to burn her, so she said it was true. What are we going to do, Andy? We can't really keep this up. I'll get spotted. And more important!! How's your hand?"
His right arm was on my shoulder, and I started stroking his hand. It only had a splint on two fingers and an Ace bandage.
"It's real stiff and kind of sore a bit, but not terrible. That feels great! Keep rubbing it like that! And, Hail, I think we can work this for a while, if you want to."
I knocked on the snack bar door, but there was no answer, Mr. Friend had already left.
"Andy, I don't want that kind of thing with you. Really. I don't."
"I know, Hailey. It will just be pretend. Hail, do you really think that because I'm gay, all I'm interested in is getting it off. I just like having you around."
"And kissing me. And getting your hands on my things. And it's not because you're gay I think that's all you want, it's because you're a jock that I think that."
We walked back to the parking lot to look for Mr. Friend. He was standing in the middle of it watching the player's cars leave. The cops were doing the same thing from inside their cars.
Andy said, "The touching there thing was just a joke, Hail. I'm sorry, and you notice I stopped when you got nicer. Kissing is nice, and maybe you didn't notice, but you kissed me back."
"Andy!" I said -- then I stopped. I knew I did kiss him. Finally I managed to say, "How do you know you're gay?"
He laughed. "What I dream about even when I try to dream about something else."
He waited for a response, but I couldn't think of one.
He kissed my forehead and said, "I'm patient, Jordan, and I won't hate you if you dreams wind up being something else. Friends?"
I got on my toes and kissed him on the lips -- the way Tracy kissed mine now that she had stopped trying to lick my epiglottis. It was an impulse, and nothing terrible to do; he is nice.
Mr. Friend finally saw us and waved. He started walking our way, and waved to the cop on the street. Half way across the lot, he stopped and answered his cell phone. He was still talking when he reached us and sounded worried and angry.
Into the phone he said, "Just a minute." Then to me, he said, "Jordan, I'm sorry I've been so busy. The first half was better, but the other teacher left, and I had to do everything. At games we have at least five here. Here's the thing, there is an extra spot in Ms Wiggin's English Lit class. I wondered if you would be interested. You'd have to change sections of physics but could still do that as an AP."
"Yes. Yes. I want to do it!"
He smiled. "That would be your fifth advanced placement or honors course, Hailey. That is a lot of work, and we don't let many juniors do that. You might want to take physics or bio as regular classes. You need to discuss it with your parents and we can go over it later."
"Oh, they will be fine. Happy even, Mr. Friend."
"OK. Are you going to be at school on Monday? I need to hurry; this call is something of a semi-emergency."
I said, "Yes. I'm supposed to help with freshman orientation, and watch for future honor society officers for Marlo."
"Great. We will talk then then," he said and disappeared under the stands.
I must have had a giant smile. Andy took my hand with his good one and moved it up and down to make me jump. I did a few times and yelled, "YAY!" Something really good had finally happened today!
Andy said, "You are nuts! You want all that extra work?"
"Oh, like you don't put out stupid amounts of effort for things. And it means the he and the teachers really think a lot of me too, and that means good recommendations to colleges next year too, and. . ."
The lot was empty now and I bounced sideways while holding on to his arm as we went to his car. I was that happy!
He said, "Jump even higher, Jord!"
"Now you're just trying to make my dress fly up, aren't you?!"
"Me? Hadn't even thought of that."
I laughed and hugged his arm.
"But, hey, you did tell me I would see your navel tonight."
We were beside his car now, and I said, "Sorry, I had something to show it off but didn't get to change."
"Well show me anyway," he said, and started trying to pull my hem up.
I slapped his hand away and wrapped my arms around him so he would stop trying. I said, "Some other time. OK?"
He pecked me on the lips, and I sighed.
Once we were inside the car, he stroked my shoulder with his only unwrapped right finger and said, "Jord, you know how jocks can tell when someone is serious about a girl? It's always a girl; we never talk about our boyfriends in the locker room."
I shook my head.
"When someone doesn't talk about hosing a girl that's when it means something, and we know we better not make any jokes about her."
He put the car in reverse and, I said, "Hosing!?"
"Yeah," he said as we rolled across the parking lot, "Hosing, bonking, womping, getting puet, putting it in the pink. You want to hear some more?"
I was laughing and shaking my head.
When he stopped before turning onto the street, there was a loud siren blast. The police car jumped forward to block the exit. The other one was right behind us with its lights flashing. The policeman got out of the front car with his hand on his gun. The PA from the car behind us yelled, "Out of the car! Keep your hands where we can see them!"
Thank you, Kristina and Daphne, for all the comma wrangling, homophone spotting, advice and support. (I've edited a bit since they saw it, and have probably added more errors. Everyone, the mistakes are not their fault!)
Also, thank you to all those who have read and/or commented. You're the ones that nourish the muse.
Trapped by the police; chased by a raging maniac (or something); trekking through deep, eerie woods on a moon lit night, Jordan continues to investigate...
17: Rising Action
10:45. Bright blue light flooded the car, then bright red, white, then darkness. Then did it again.
The Case of the Missing MacGuffin was coming to a disastrous end.
No!
It wasn't the time for self-recrimination, not for doubts. It wasn't the time to think about the time I'd wasted. It wasn't the time to give up!
It was the time to plan, the time for action.
"Don't say anything, Andy. I'll do the talking."
He shrugged. "Hey, we haven't done nothin'. No worries." Then he laughed.
I didn't laugh. I had done nothing to get chased ten blocks this morning.
I had done nothing to get followed through town and through the mall.
Blair had done nothing to get hauled in by the cops and questioned.
I stayed cool.
The loudspeaker repeated, "Get out of the car! Now!"
They were going to ask questions. They were going to find out who I was. They were going to call my parents. Pictures would be in the papers. In a sundress. With pink hair!!
I looked out the back window. A spotlight came on to blind me.
One cop was at Andy's door; he held a flashlight by his face and shined it into the car; he kept one hand on the butt of his gun. "Leave the keys in the ignition! Keep you hands where I can see them! Out - slowly!"
Andy stepped out of the car and held his hands above his shoulders. "What's the problem, Officers?"
The cop yelled, "Shut up, and get your hands on the hood."
The policeman still on the loud speakers said, "Christ. He's shooting us the bird, Chuck."
I jumped out of the car and started to run to Andy's side. I yelled, "No! His hand is hurt! He has to hold it like that!! No!"
"Stop! Stand where you are! Put your hands on the hood. Stay on the other side of the vehicle."
I couldn't do all of those things at once but I stopped at the front of the car. "But what do you want with us? We haven't done anything!"
"I said 'shut up'!"
The policeman from the car behind came forward, also with his light shining into our eyes so we couldn't look straight at him. His hand was also on his holstered pistol.
The first cop kicked Andy's feet apart and away from the car so his weight was on his hands, and he was off balance.
"Can't you see his hand is hurt? Don't make him do that."
"Get back to the other side of the damn car!"
The cop patted Andy's back, his arms and chest, his pockets, and his legs, including inside of his thighs, all the way down to his shoes.
He walked around the car to my side. He was going to frisk me! He would feel my breasts and know they are fake. He was going to feel between my legs!
He grabbed my shoulder and shoved me to the passenger side. "I told you to put you hands on the hood. Do It Now."
I did. He kicked my feet back the way he had Andy's. Now the search! The end!
Leaning forward made my dress fall away from my body. He pointed his light down the front of my dress and held it there. Then he pulled my dress back, tight against my stomach. He shined the light down my back.
"He didn't tell me one of them was a girl," he said to the other cop almost laughing.
"You got lucky. I get to do it next time."
"Shut up, Kyle. She'll report us."
"No one will believe her. Get the stuff."
The second cop took the keys from the car and opened the trunk. The first one kept a watch on Andy and me.
The officer at the back of the car said, "Nothing back here, Chuck,"
"Fucking what! Look in the boxes."
"None here."
The first cop went to the back of the car. "Shit - that jerk told me they always had some after games. He's supposed to be the big supplier and might be other stuff here too."
"So, what now?"
"Take out the spare tire. If it ain't there, we take out the back seat."
I mouthed, "What are they looking for," to Andy.
He shrugged his shoulders. "It's a good thing we got rid of that bottle last night."
"Ssshhh!!"
The coaches had come out of the locker room and watched from way across the parking lot. A tow truck was parked in the middle of the lot facing us, and someone stood by the door talking to the driver as they leered. Every car on the boulevard slowed down to stare at us.
Andy started doing one handed pushups against the hood and smiled at me.
"Cut it out, Andy," I growled.
One of the cops yelled, "Shut Up, and Stand Still! Let's tie 'em up, Chuck."
Their flashlights weren't by their heads now, and I could see that their faces were young, and that their badges were tilted squares, not stars. That meant they had less than two years on the police force.
One cop wrapped an arm across my chest and stood me upright. He pulled an arm behind my back and high between my shoulder blades and then pulled the other arm back and crossed my wrists. He wrapped a strap around them and pulled it tight. He kept one hand under my arm pit, wiggling his fingers, as he guided me towards the street, and pushed me down so I was sitting on the edge of the curb with my legs in the gutter. The other cop handcuffed Andy and sat him on the curb ten feet from me.
I tried to fold my legs under my dress, but I was afraid I'd slip off the curb and fall over. Every time I moved the cuffs got tighter. The people in the cars kept slowing down to stare. All I could do to block their view was keep my legs tightly closed and my knees under my chin.
"Let's get the damn seat out."
"I got a half a pint of Jim Beam under my seat if we need it."
"We better find something, now we tied 'em up."
They must have called for reinforcements because I could hear a siren coming closer.
"Hot shit! Look. There's a duffle bag in the front seat, and it's full of bottles. This is it."
"Hell. That's just her purse. It's him we're searching."
Kepperman's pills were still in one of the side pockets! "That's private! Don't open it!"
"Oh, you don't mind. Or we do it at the station."
"I can feel the bottles in it. We don't need her permission. And it's on school property."
"That's just hair stuff! Leave it alone!"
A voice came form the parking lot. "Officers, can I talk to you."
Mr. Friend! Thank God! He would tell these two cops that Andy and I didn't need to be treated like this!
I couldn't turn around to see the parking lot, and I couldn't tell what they were saying, but I could tell they were having a heated conversation behind Andy's car.
"Nothing!" I heard Mr. Friend shout. He was really giving it to those jerks, but good!
The new police car pulled to a stop right in front of me. I recognized Officer Benwell's voice, and it sounded angry. "You two again. I've about had it with you."
I said, "We didn't do anything! Honest!"
Mr. Benwell glared at me and then kept walking towards the other policemen.
Mr. Friend said, "Hello, Lloyd. You here to supervise?"
One of the other cops said, "Benwell, we're doing duty for the lieutenant. Special detail. School report."
"This bag is full of booze, Benwell."
I said, "No, it's not! That's just shampoo."
"Shut up, girlie."
Officer Benwell said, "You two have warrants? What's your probable cause to open her bag?"
"School property -- sanctioned search. Hell, Lloyd, you know it's gotta be in there for her to panic like that."
"I heard that when you stopped this car, you didn't have a school administrator there. Did you, boys?"
"He was over in the buildings. They were leaving. Got one here now though."
I said, "Stop them, Mr. Friend. Don't let them open my bag."
Mr. Friend said, "I don't know. Your report was about the car and driver, not the bag."
"Hell's bells," the cop named Kyle said. "We can tell it's full of bottles. It's illegal for her to have liquor, and double illegal to have it at school. That's probable cause."
Mr. Friend said, "I am sorry, Jordan, but if you and Andy do have alcohol in there on school property, -- and there are a lot of bottles in there, it's obvious -- and I stop them, I wouldn't be doing my job. I think I have to let them look inside. I don't really have a choice at this point."
I looked backwards just well enough to see the young cop dump my bag out on to the car seat.
"Looks like hair stuff to me. Smells awful, but it ain't likely drinkable," Benwell said. "You two started a search without cause or school supervision. You tied them up before an arrest when they weren't giving you trouble. Then you left them right on the street against policy. Head out to the highway. I'll try to keep 'em from filling a complaint on your asses."
One of the rookie cops said, "And lookie here. Some little pink pills! I just wonder what these are." Victory filled his voice.
I yelled, "Those aren't even mine!"
"She's sure scared about them, huh. Going to check them on the computer."
"Let me see those!" Mr. Friend said. "Where did you get these, Hailey? Are these Andy's?"
"No! I found them. I don't know whose they are. Really! Honest!"
Officer Benwell was silent.
I put my head down on my knees and closed my eyes. I didn't know what those things were, but I knew I probably shouldn't have them and that they could use them to take me in.
Mr. Friend said, "Well. This really wasn't on your original report. I don't know if we need to pursue this."
"The hell. Doesn't matter if it's on the report. It was found on the search, in plain sight. I'm looking on the computer."
"But - uhh - it wasn't what you were looking for," Mr. Friend said, "I don't think we need to go into it.
Mr. Benwell said, "Let me look at that. Either of you boys remember seeing pills like this on the bulletins? I know you keep up with those like you're supposed."
Andy started laughing very loudly. He yelled, "Hailey, you lied to me!"
He had managed to turn around and face the parking lot. I gapped at him.
"Those are her birth control pills! She told me she didn't take them!"
"They aren't mine! I mean it! They aren't!"
Andy laughed even louder.
Mr. Friend grabbed the pills. "OK. OK, I think we have embarrassed Hailey enough. You don't really have anything."
From ten feet I could see Andy rolling his tongue around inside his cheeks and across his lips. When he saw me looking at him, he grinned and wiggled his eye brows.
One cop said, "OK, what are the pills, girl?"
"I don't know! They are someone else's. Maybe allergy pills?"
Benwell said, "You've got nothing. Get out of here, and I'll try to keep these two from suing you.
Andy said, "Mr. Benwell, that one was shining his light down the front of Hailey's dress too."
"I was looking for weapons, Lloyd. That's all."
The other young cop said, "We were told it was a sure-fire big bust!"
"Bust?" Benwell said and snorted "You don't want to be talking about busts after what Andy just said."
"We were told it would be more than just a bottle of whiskey," the second rookie said.
Benwell shook his head. "Kyle, go watch the shopping mall empty out. Chuck, go sit on Streke Road and make sure there's no drag races tonight."
"You ain't a sergeant, Lloyd."
"You two want to call the station and ask if that's an idea, or you want me to? Stadium's empty; your duty for the Lieutenant's done.
Mr. Friend escorted the two rookies to their cruisers and off of the school grounds. Mr. Benwell took the straps they used for hand cuffs off my wrists, and pain flooded my hands. I cried, "Get them off Andy! His hand is already hurt!"
"OK. I will, I will. They didn't do those cuffs right either. You keep rubbing your hands and moving your fingers. And hang on to that strap as a souvenir of something you don't want to ever happen again."
I could see Andy wince and grit his teeth when his strap was loose.
"Is it OK, Andy?" I said.
"It hurts like holy hell, Hail," he said, but he had that big grin again. He put his good arm around my shoulders and kissed the top of my head.
I let him do that and leaned my head onto his chest. We had to keep up appearances in front of the cop, right?
"We should show it to a doctor," I said as I rubbed his injured hand.
"It will be OK. I just need a kiss."
I rolled my eyes, but I kissed his bandaged hand to keep the masquerade up for Officer Benwell.
Andy said, "That's not the kiss I meant," and tried to kiss my lips.
I turned my head and slapped his shoulder, but didn't try to get away. Officer Benwell laughed at us.
The second of the rookie's cars peeled out onto the boulevard, and Mr. Friend came back. "No PDAs, you two."
Andy said, "An arm on a shoulder isn't a PDA, is it, sir?"
Still, I pulled away from Andy, but he wouldn't let go of my hand.
The tow truck that had been sitting in the center of the parking lot pulled around our car and onto the road. That Mac guy who had given us a ride last night was driving, and he held his hand up in a pretend wave as he went past without looking at us.
Mr. Friend said, "So what was all that about? What got them on your case?"
"Nothing, sir. Really."
Officer Benwell said, "Those two got a report someone was carrying booze for the team, Arnie. They got the wrong car."
"Was it the wrong car, Andy?"
"My trunk's empty. I don't ever have anything in my car."
Benwell eyed Andy. He knew there was liquor in Andy's car sometimes, because of last night.
Benwell said, "Don't know why they were working this alone anyway."
"Well, that's probably because all the senior officers gripe about doing this job, Lloyd. So, you weren't planning to get drunk again tonight, huh, Andy?"
Andy started then began, "Mr. Friend! I don't. . .", but he remembered that Mr. Benwell knew about last night and said, "Not very often. Really! I've got life plans, Mr. Friend. You know that."
"I know. Well, you got real lucky you didn't have anything for tonight yet. And there wasn't anything else in the car, humm."
I said, "No! Nothing."
"And those pills aren't yours, Andy?"
"No, sir. I didn't know anything about them."
Mr. Friend sighed and pinched his nose. "I suppose you two are going to the park and boast about your big adventure now. You should go home."
Andy said, "We need to talk to people. They will have heard about this, and we need to stop the rumors before they grow. Don't you think so?"
"Oh, right. That's a point. So you will be going to the park then."
I said, "If Mr. Benwell lets us."
"I can't say you can't. I don't see you've done anything wrong tonight, but do stay out of it from now on."
Mr. Friend said, "What else are they into, Lloyd?"
"A lot a' trouble."
I said, "It just hasn't been a good day, Mr. Friend. We aren't doing anything wrong. I'll see you Monday morning then?"
"What? What for?"
"Ms. Wiggin's class?"
"Oh, that honors class. Yeah, we will see all about that next week."
The cop said, "The next time you see me, it will be 'cus I want to see you! All right?"
We nodded a lot and backed away from them. Then we got out of there as fast as we could while driving very slowly.
I put my head on my knees and sighed. "Oh, God! Oh, God!"
Andy rubbed my back and said, "It's all over now, Jor. It's done."
"Andy how could you act like that?"
"Like what?"
"Push ups - screwing around. They were nuts; you could have pissed them off more."
"I wouldn't have gone that far. Really. It was like watching the defense screw up from the sidelines; I can't do anything about it. I get silly, huh? I wasn't that bad."
"Maybe not, but they might have blown up."
"I'm sorry, Hails. I didn't mean to scare you more."
I was still bent over and was sitting on most of the things from my purse. I started to pull them out and said, "Huh? It's not that. I guess you weren't terrible. And thinking of the birth control pills was great, except now Officer Benwell thinks I'm a slut."
"Better than thinking you’re a druggie."
"Yeah. Friend thinks you're an alkie. Do you drink that much?"
"Last night was as much as I ever drink, and not very often. Just to not be too weird around the team. He hasn't told anyone though, or the coaches would have talked to me."
"Ummm. Maybe counselors have special rules. But…" I thought about Mr. Friend. "He stopped the cops from looking up those pills, and he knows I'm not taking birth control pills."
"Well, sometimes boys do."
I sighed. "Yeah. He thinks I'm trans. Probably thought I was gay before."
"Don't worry, you aren't the first at school, Jord."
"And he's not the first to think that, is he? Does he know about you?"
"Yep. Tried to tell me it was a real bad idea one time, without actually saying that." Andy was smiling about the whole thing. That smile could be annoying as hell, and it could be great to see and, sometimes, it was both at once.
I started thinking about the MacGuffin, and why we had been set up with those cops, those particular cops.
"That wasn't mistaken identity, Andy. They said it was someone from the school."
"No. There were lots of people; dads, local booster types; walking around the sidelines tonight, Jordie. Lots of them could have told those cops anything. None of the real coaches would have done that without giving me "the speech" first."
"Do you know Kipperman? Was he there?"
"Yeah. - And yeah, he was."
Andy put his hand on my back and started playing with the string on my dress.
"Keep your hands on the wheel, Andy. They were looking for something more than just a bottle, you know."
He moved his hand. "I know, and you are just no fun at all, and there's a cop about half a block behind us."
I jerked my head around and then jerked it back. "Shiiii! Is he following us? Shhhh!"
Andy made an overly careful U-turn, and I quickly peeked out the back to see the cruiser turn around too. We went into a sub-division of huge houses on small lots. The turns were too close together for us to see if the cop was following. Andy sped up on a very short block, then turned at three intersections in a row.
Instead of another major street we came out on a narrow road that ran beside a green belt. There was no sign of the cop behind us, but when we reached an intersection there was a patrol car there too.
"Andy, get to a store somewhere - a gas station. Before he turns on his siren."
"We're at the park - the back side. If he stops, he'll know there are lots of people watching from the trees"
Andy drove up a dirt road and parked near some other cars and as close to the trees as possible. The cop car pulled in too and stopped right behind us, but no one got out of it.
Andy said, "Just act normal. Don't even look at him."
As soon as we were out of the car, I heard Mr. Benwell call, "Andy. Jordan. Come over here."
I don't know if I felt more relieved or stupid. I know I giggled and Andy laughed.
When we got to the car window, he said, "I got some things to say that I didn't think you'd want that school guy to hear. First, Andy, quit drinking. I didn't know you did that enough for the school to know about it, or I wouldn't of helped you last night. Got that? Never again. Second, don't stay in this park long. Don't hang around looking for trouble."
Andy said, "I haven't ever drank very much or very often, sir. Not like last night before and won't again. You know my father would freak. I don't know where Mr. Friend got that idea, and I have to be home by midnight to take a pill for my hand, so we won't be long."
"'K. Whatever. Now I got to talk to Jordan. Go over there."
Andy walked to the trees and Mr. Benwell said, "I told you to keep Andy out of trouble. You sure have done a crappy job of it."
"Sorry."
He shook his head. "Yeah, I know. So that school guy, Friend, knows you?"
I nodded.
"You go home when Andy does. And I guess you aren't gonna want to make a complaint against those two idiots, are you?"
I shook my head. I was as nervous talking to him as I'd been talking to those other two cops, but I wasn't scared of him, more embarrassed at being scolded.
"Gimme those pills. I don't think you need them for birth control, and if I find out they're what I think they are, I'm gonna have to tell your folks. I know they're good people and don't need you messing up your body and life."
"They weren't in the car. Honest. I think Mr. Friend kept them. And I really don't know what they are, Mr. Benwell. I promise. I just found them. I don't take them. Really. They might be aspirin."
"Aspirin don't have pictures of some sort of snake or something on them, Jordan. I'm gonna keep looking until I find out what it is."
"But I really don't know."
"How did you get them?"
What would a cop think of my keeping the pills? They had definitely been lost behind the seat, but I did know it was Kipperman's truck. And I wasn't sure enough about Kipperman to want to bring the cops in yet. That's not done until everything is certain. I couldn't tell Mr. Benwell the whole story. "I just found them lying around. I was going to look them up. I guess that was dumb. But no way was I ever going to take them."
The officer just stared at me. Finally I said, "Can I ask you something, sir? Has any thing at all happened with the MacGuffin since this morning?"
"Nope. It hardly got mentioned in the squad meeting. And that's another thing -- you leave that alone too. There were two kids we were supposed to watch for, but they seem to have disappeared. You don't know anything about them do you?
I shook my head. "I'm not sure who you mean."
"Stay in the park just long enough to let the kids know you ain't in jail, then leave, Jordan. And forget about the MacGuffin.
"Maggie wants to know when you're coming for those bikes."
"If I can find a ride, I'll do it tomorrow. Is that OK? If I can't I’ll call the diner; it's Big D's, right? Your daughter's clothes are in my mother's car. I'll take them to the diner too. All right?"
"I'm supposed to be working. I'd say 'see you around', but I hope I don't."
18: To a Plateau
I had never been in The Forest of Arden before.
People from all the high schools and even some from the university in the next suburb gathered here at night, and everyone told their parents that they had never heard of the place.
Of course, I'd looked around during the day and, once in eighth grade, Blair and I snuck out at eleven and rode bikes to the park. We only dared to peer into the trees from across the pond though, and that was as close as I'd ever come to The Woods, because it had to be night to be The Woods that everyone talked about.
Andy was waiting at the start of the trail to the clearing. He was already flanked by numbers 87 and 43, the two football players who had chased me away from him last night. They seemed to think they were his body guards, or maybe they just thought they would get the ball more by hanging onto him.
I would have been excited, or maybe anxious, about finally going into the woods, but I was too embarrassed about being scared in the car. I shrugged my shoulders and stuck my tongue out an inch as I walked up. That got me one of those Andy smiles.
Andy put his arm across my shoulder right away and whispered, "Hey, I was worried too."
Number 87 said, "You're that Hailey kid's cousin, huh? Condolences."
"Why's that so bad if I am?"
"Uh - Geek?"
"Knock it off, Blaine," Andy said.
Number 43 piped in with, "And he's got a crush on Andy too."
"Oh! Does he, Andy?" I was laughing. I already knew the way these guys' minds worked, and it didn't bother me, much.
"Alright, Shut Up," Andy said.
The two football players laughed. "Andy's always getting pissed about gay jokes. He's got a gay uncle or something. We're just kidding around, Andy."
"He's OK - funny and smart and always willing to help out and stuff. Those are good things. Don't knock 'em just because you two assholes are the opposite. He's also an athlete. You wish you were as fast and quick as he is, and so does Coach."
"Woo. He's got it bad for you, Hailey - building up your cousin. So you both get called Hailey, huh. I heard how your parents twisted your names up. Bet that gets screwed up all the time?"
"We're not seen together much, so not really."
"I can see why you wouldn't want to be seen with him." Another laugh which I ignored and pushed Andy up the trail.
Ahead of us there were weird lights shining in all directions, and I asked what they were.
43 said, "Haven't you been here lately, huh? There's a burn-ban, 'cause of no rain all summer. People pile flashlights into the fire ring and grills - not that we'd have a fire in August if we could - but since they say 'no'."
A loud group groan came from the clearing, and then came a shout. "I FUCKING AM TOO!!"
"Knock It The Hell Off, Pike! JUST GO AWAY!"
The four of us stopped on the path. 87 said, "Sounds like Pike still has a problem with you, Andy."
"Damn Bitch! Saying She Beat Me Up! I'm Gonna Rip Her!"
"Jojo, Get him out of HERE! PLEASE!" That was Tracy's voice.
Blair came trotting up the path. She was panting and grabbed me and said, "Jordan, don't go in there, or you, Andy. Wait 'til he leaves. He's shit crazy."
Andy said, "I'll go talk him down. Hails, wait here a minute."
"No. I'll talk to him. I'll tell him I didn't say anything about the fight to anyone."
Blair said, "He won't care, stupid! He has to kill the rumor, and that means beat the crap out of you."
Andy said, "Just wait, Hail. I'll take care of it."
"Andy! Your hand is already hurt! Now he knows it's the wrong one. I'm not letting you go alone! And I caused it anyway."
"We'll go keep him away," one of the jocks said.
Blair said, "Andy, just keep Jordan here. He'll try to be a jerk-assed-hero otherwise."
"Screw you to hell, Blair," I screamed, but then we heard a bull elephant coming up the path towards us. Blair pushed me towards the trees and said, "JUST GO!" Then she headed towards the clearing and the sound.
Andy's arm tightened on my shoulder, and I was pulled further from the path. When we were twenty feet away he shoved me against a huge oak trunk and held me there with his whole body against mine.
"Andy, let me go," I said, but quietly.
"No, Jord. Really. Discretion's the better part of valor, and like that." His restraint eased into an embrace, and he kissed my forehead. "Besides, you smell, and taste, good."
"Cut it out!"
The path was full of people and meaningless noise. Pike screamed a cussword every other step. and when he reached the cars he bellowed, "Aaaagh. Suckers. Ran Away."
I heard Hancock. "Com'on, Pike, we got other things to do. Leave it."
The elephant and his followers were coming back up the trail. The noises left the path and entered the trees on our side of the trail.
Andy pulled me deeper into the woods, and deep into some brush. I wasn't trying to go back anymore, not to talk to the maker of all that noise, but Andy kept pulling me.
I heard Pike coming towards our thicket. I knew my baby blue sundress would show up easily if he looked this way. Andy was wearing a boy uniform, olive pants and black shirt. I wrapped my dress close to my body and held myself against him, away from the stampede.
When pike had gone past, we found our way out the other side of the brambles and were beside the country club fence.
Andy sat down. I sat right next to him, and he wrapped me in a hug. I pulled back, and he said, "Jordan, even straight guys need hugs sometimes and, boy, you do now."
I hadn't realized how scared I'd been until I noticed how good his holding me and rubbing my back felt.
He whispered, "I could use a hug too, Hails."
Oh well, no one was around, and whether I did or didn't wouldn't change Andy's feelings, or behavior. I wrapped my arms around him and put my head on his chest.
I stayed like that taking deep breathes until he said, "Better, Jord?"
"Uh-huh. You?"
"Uh-huh." He kissed me, this time on the mouth, not head, and this time he put his tongue into my mouth.
My own tongue touched his teeth, then I pulled my head away quickly. "Andy, don't. I don't -- don't want to be gay."
"Good. But I never thought you were crazy or stupid, pretty bug."
I could still hear Pike thundering in the distance, but I chuckled. "Pretty bug!!??"
Andy laughed too. "I don't know. It just popped into my head. Fits you a lot though, Jord."
I was still laughing. "I like you, Andy," I said as I buried my head in his chest again.
"I think you are the best thing around - except for banana pudding ice cream, of course." He moved his head towards my mouth again.
I sat up and turned away from him. "But I just don't. . ."
"We're not going anywhere you don't want to. I'm sorry I kissed you like that, Jord."
I shook my head hard enough to make my hair swing.
There were twigs and leaves stuck to my dress, and I started picking them off. It was something to do besides look at Andy. The noises coming from the clearing and from the trees was still there but getting softer.
Andy saw what I was doing with my dress and said, "You want help with that? And you promised to show me your bellybutton ring, remember? Besides, how did you fool that cop when he stared at you breasts?"
"Shut up, Andy. --- Andy, it's all - all of this - it's all got something to do with the MacGuffin. Getting chased this morning, the fight with Pike, the cops tonight, and the kid following me." I had to fill him in on the part about me being followed, including the story of racking the boy.
"Wow. You have an exciting life, huh? But it can't all tie in, Jord. It's just coincidence. And why would anyone be setting you up anyway?"
"It's got to be Kipperman, doesn't it? He just saw Blair and me, and needed someone to distract the cops. Right?"
"But that would mean he learned who he saw near the fence. Or he's moved on to a girl who happens to also be you. And how would he know you would be at that shop so that boy could find you? He didn't know you were going to be in my car tonight either. Tons of gaps. I don't see it fitting together. Sorry, pretty bug."
"I'm stuck with that name, huh?"
"'Fraid so." He tried to start a long kiss yet again, and I put my fingers on his lips.
"I'm going to go over to the shed on the golf course and look around."
"I've got to go take that pill for my hand, bug."
"I know that. Just ask Tracy to wait 'til I get back and give me a ride, or I'll just walk home. It's not far."
He shook his head. "Not going to happen. You're not going over there alone. The pill can wait. But you have to show me your bellybutton ring first."
That condition got what it deserved -- ignored. "There won't be anyone there at night, Andy. Don't worry about it, besides I can handle myself, you know."
"No kidding. But, buggie, I don't want you to handle it alone. I'm going if you go."
"No! I won't be 'buggie'. No way. I need something to call you. How about 'Bozo'?"
"Non-original."
"That's OK as long as you really, really hate it."
Lots of tiny burrs, beggar's lice, had gotten all over me. Some of them, and some dead leaves and sticks, had even gotten inside the halter top. Andy was covered in the lice too, but his clothes didn't give them the chance to get on the inside. I was trying to pick the burrs out from the inside without pulling the dress too far away from my body.
"Just undo the top. Boys can see each other's chests, remember. Or I'll close my eyes."
I undid the string behind my neck with a sigh, and laid the top across my lap. I don't know why Andy's grin didn't make the beggar's lice easier to see.
"Those are some great boobs, bug."
"Not really. They don't even have nipples. That cop must not have seen very many, and I bet you haven't either."
"My sister knows I'm gay, or maybe she wouldn't care anyway. That must have been scary as shit, Jord. God, that cop could have. . ." Then he stared at me.
I shook my head. I didn't want to talk, or think, about that. "None of the sticks went all the way through. Still, I bet there are little holes and snags all over the place. Pike's a piece of shit. It's brand new."
Andy started plucking gently at the burrs. "You planning on wearing it again?"
""Well. . ." I held my shoulders by my ears for several seconds before I let them drop.
"You do look good. You like being so cute. Admit it."
"Not that good, and boys don't like being cute."
"They're told they don't, but some do."
"And you shouldn't like these clothes, should you?"
"Yeah. No. Hell, Jordan. I see people in stuff like that, and it does nothing for me. But I know who you are, and it's really great. I say to myself it's not about what's between the legs, but then … it is. Or it is because it's you. Or. . ." He held his shoulders up by his ears until he heard me chuckle.
"OK. See my navel ring?"
He flashed his bright smile again and reached over to touch the pin.
"Don't move it around. It's still tender."
He didn't touch the ring, but softly rubbed my stomach and put his finger in my bellybutton. "I like this. It's not an innie or an outie. It's a tweenie."
"That's just because I'm so skinny. You didn't even notice my ear rings."
"Did too. Pretty -- Cute! Your hips are wider than your waist too. Aren't many that way in football locker rooms, even on the guys that aren't just huge road blocks."
I put my hand on top of his as he kept brushing the inside of my navel. "They aren't by very much. -- Andy, -- Andy, I'm almost sixteen. I know it's weird to be that old and never have - never have done it with anyone. Not, you know, anyone, not anything -- but I just want to wait."
"Why do you think it's all just about that, bug? And I doubt it's that weird for sixteen year olds really. You just believe what too many of them say they've done."
"Yeah. You have though?"
I got no answer.
"Who?"
"A tight end at a football camp. I don't know how we dared make a move or which one of us did."
I laughed. "Is a tight end better than a split end?"
"Shut up, creep."
I leaned on his arm. "Was that just sex?"
"Na-uh. He quit football and lives on the coast, but we write. It wasn't It, but it was something. Second one was an old guy, a senior then, last year. A tutor the coach set up. He was obviously gay, and …
"Huh! The coach got you a gay tutor? He knows?"
"Hell no! - I was bigger, so safe, you know? Anyway, I made the first pass. Thought I could get lessons in something besides algebra I guess, but he wasn't that good at either. Meaning something matters to me. OK? That's all of them, pretty bug, promise."
My new name made me smile still, but then I sighed. I felt sorry for Andy. I was sorry I couldn't be It for him.
He was still petting my stomach, and fingering my bellybutton, when I suddenly heard, "Gees, get a room already, Andy."
I turned around before I remembered to pull the top of my dress up over my chest. It was number 43, and I realized there had been people in the woods calling our names for a while.
"We thought this was pretty damn private."
The intruder turned around. He said, "Jojo got Pike into the back of his truck and hauled him away. Hailey's safe."
"OK. We'll head back."
43 disappeared into the trees.
"Shit," I said, and tried fix my top.
"You worry too much. Hold your hair up."
I do not!" I said as he tied a bow to hold up my halter top. "Andy, I don't want to go back there."
"Because Dion saw your tits? He thinks they're real, and he won't talk because he thinks we're serious."
"Not just that. Because of the Pike thing! And I'll have to talk to everyone. And someone is going to recognize me or something. And now you'd be ruined too."
Andy sighed. "Really, don't panic, my pretty bug. I want to show you off! Anyway, it won't be for long. I've got to take that pill.And we have to make a showing, Jord."
We walked along the fence looking for a way around the thick brush.
"Your hand's starting to bother you, huh?"
"A little. How did you know?"
"You mentioned your pill - twice." I placed his left arm on my shoulder and took his right hand to pet.
He said, "That's the first time you've ever done that, bug."
"What? Rubbed your hand?"
"You've never started a hug, or anything. Just allowed that."
"I've said I like you, Andy, OK?"
He moved his good hand down to my waist and held me tighter, but he was quiet.
I was quiet too. I did like him, and I liked holding his hand, and, and I liked him holding me, and -- Jays H. . . . Crud.
It wouldn't work. It wouldn't work. It couldn't work anyway.
When I saw the lights in the clearing, I got on my toes and kissed his chin. I started walking again and began to try to tell him that, even if I wasn't recognized, or read, tonight, in the dark, it would be impossible for me to keep being seen with him. I was never going to get the chance to best the pet name he had given me.
"Andy, . . .," I started softly, but by then I could see into the clearing, and right near the opening I saw Bobby, the brat who had chased me through the mall, and he was with the other boy and with the bigger ones that had been in the car.
I stopped where the path became wider at the clearing's entrance. "Oh, shit, Andy. It's him. The brat from the mall."
"Jordie, you can't hide. I know! Let's disguise you as a boy!"
"Andy, it's not funny. I just. . . Just go ahead, and ask Blair - Blair and Tracy, to come out here a minute, and I'll go over to the shed now."
"Jord, people will want to talk to you. And I mean it, you can't go over there without me."
"Andy! You have to take care of your hand. I'm not letting you come! Just tell everyone I'm too upset. No. No. . . Nevermind. Bobby Creep won't do anything with lots of people around, will he?"
"You mean Bobby Adams? He's just a freshman, wants to be a linebacker."
"You think that makes him not an asshole? It's different for girls, Andy, and, and more different for, for . . ."
"For boys in disguise? I get it, bug. I just wouldn't have thought Bobby would do that. You don't need to go talk to everyone if you don't want."
"They'll all know I'm hiding in the woods, won't they? So, OK, but then I'm going to the shed and don’t be a pain. Go take your pill, please. I'll be OK."
Andy shook his head fast, squeezed me, and kissed me on the forehead.
I said, "I hate you, Alpha."
"Huh??"
"Well, I hate liking you." I stopped and hugged him just as the path got wider.
"Alpha," he said and chuckled. "Yeah, that's more than bad enough."
"There they are!" someone yelled.
A crowd that had been by the swing set surged towards us. Blair, Tracy, and Cynthia, Andy's big sister, were in the lead. I saw Bobby and his whole group walk the opposite direction, and the crowd reached us just before we stepped into the clearing.
Blair reached me first and put her hand on my shoulder.
Tracy yelled, "Jorie, are you OK! Are you OK!" and wrapped me in a hug
Andy's sister started a private conversation with him in spite of the crowd. "About time you got here, twerp. Where's your phone? Dad's been calling and you are in deep shit. We have to go home."
Lots of other people said lots of other things, most directed at Andy.
I said, "Yeah, Trace, fine." I returned her hug and looked at Blair, who just leered back at me.
Andy said, "What for now? It's his rule I can't leave it in my locker, and I forgot to get it from the car. What did you tell him I did, creep?"
Someone from the crowd yelled, "What did the cops get you for this time?"
Another voice said, "They let you go when the realized you’re a hero?"
"Not hardly," Andy said. "Someone told them there was booze in my car. Of course I would never have something like that, so they let me go."
Cynthia said, "Say 'good-bye' to your adoring fans, asshole, and we've got to get out of here right away."
In a quieter voice Andy said, "So what's up his ass this time, pig face?"
"I'll bet it was some Farrel jerk trying to get you up the creek, Andy."
A voice at the back of the crowd said, "No way. We wouldn't do that kind of shit."
"Yeah. Like you wouldn't stomp on his hand!"
Cynthia said, "Look, piss-ant, you've missed two damn pills. He's afraid you won't be able to work out tomorrow, and he's on me like I'm supposed to babysit your runty ass."
Andy hollered, "Nah. It was just mistaken identity is all." He held up his bandaged hand and said, "Look. I've got to get home and take care of this thing. Really, it was no biggie, guys. I'll get you the details later."
"But what happened with that?"
"What did Pike do really?"
"Did she actually kick his fat ass?"
I yelled, "No. Everything you've heard is wrong. OK?"
"Hailey, you can stay. I want to hear about that."
"No. I need to go too."
Part of the crowd drifted back into the clearing. Andy and I dodged a bunch more questions as we walked towards his car, and soon the rest of the group gave up too.
Blair tried to pull Tracy back, but I grabbed her hand and said, "Wait, guys. Will you come with me to the shed on the golf course? Andy won't let me go alone."
"Aww, is he being all macho-protective of little, sweet, precious Jordie now. And you're still going to be the great big hero - heroine, huh, precious?"
"Get the hell over it, Blair! Just forget you! Tracy, will you help me, please."
Cynthia said, "So, shithead, speaking of bottles, did you steal that Jack I had in the trunk?"
"Yeah, slut, I did. Damn lucky, 'cuz I'd be in jail right now otherwise. We better not leave stuff in there anymore."
"Yeah. Well, I'd sold that stuff, dick lick, and made ten bucks on it. I need the money back, and now."
"Like I got that much, bitch."
"Andy! They're holding stuff from the trunk hostage, and I've got to get it back by Monday."
"So what did you do with what they gave you?"
"I spent it, of course. You drank it - you owe me."
"Cyn, I don't have that kind of cash."
"The score sheets for last spring's swimming, golf and tennis teams were all in there. I was supposed to take them to school on Monday. We've got to get it somewhere."
Blair said, "We had some of that bourbon. I'll give you some money."
Andy said, "I'd need like twenty, and none of you really swallowed it. We'll work it out."
"Don't worry about it. I'm rich right now," Blair said.
"Where did you get money, Blair?" I asked. She never had any, ever. I wondered if she was getting herself into something or something.
"This rich asshole threw over forty bucks at me to pay for nine dollars worth of sushi."
"I did!" My mother must have slipped some into my bag. "Give me the rest back, Blair."
She pocketed the extra cash with a smirk.
Cynthia said, "Great. Thanks. You're off the hook for now, dorkus. You're Blair? I kind of thought so, but I thought people were calling you Luke though?"
"Just messing around," Blair said, sounding a bit worried.
Cynthia faced me and said, "And you, you look like a boy."
Quickly Tracy said, "So do you, Cynthia, but no one ever brings it up."
Cynthia laughed at that. "Not too bad for you, Tracy, but I meant she looked like someone -- like that Hailey kid!"
Blair said, "Yeah. It's that she's his cousin on both sides of the family. Lots of people were talking about it all night. That's all it is. Didn't you hear about it?"
"Maybe the sophomores were talking about it, not us."
Andy said, "We're juniors now, Porsche butt. If you've been a senior since May, it's time you got that right."
"Whatever, scuzz breath. But -- No! It's him! Gawd, cum eater, you've taken your perversion to a whole new level!"
Blair and Tracy both yelled she that she was wrong, and I tried to vanish.
Andy, pulled me closer to him. "If I'm cum-eater, what are you, clit throat? You talk about this and I'll put epoxy - moisture activated stuff - on all of your dildos."
Cynthia was roaring with laughter. She opened the driver's side door and said, "Say 'good night' to all you little perv friends, fagot, and let's get home before the old man blows a third gasket."
Andy hugged me tight, and I let him. I even hugged him back. "What's she going to do?"
"Don't worry about her at all, pretty bug. She won't say anything to anyone. Promise."
"You sure?"
"Indubitably!"
"Good. I hate dubitals."
He laughed at my stupid joke, and I grinned at his laughter. He tried to kiss me, and I whispered, "Not in front of them."
He squeezed me, which reminded me that it was probably too late to worry about what they saw, but even if it was too late to matter, I didn't want Blair - any of them - to see it, to see me like it. I just didn't.
I pulled away from him, and I blushed.
Blair snickered. Tracy chuckled. Cynthia chortled.
Andy sighed and then his smile flashed, but it was a sad smile this time, and then I didn't care what they saw. I hugged him hard. He kissed me. I kissed him harder. I wanted to! I wanted to do it! I wanted to do it more.
But I don't know why. I don't know why I wanted to. I don't know if I really wanted to.
"Are you going to the shed?" he asked.
Still in his arms, and with my arms enwrapping him, I said, "Uh-huh."
"Tracy and Blair going too?"
"Uh-huh."
"We could do it tomorrow?"
"Nah-uh. Too many Sunday golfers, and I don't want to wait 'til night. There won't be anyone there now, alpha. It won't be a problem."
"You know how to get in?"
"There's a hole in the back."
"Be careful, please, pretty bug."
Blair and Tracy continued their snickering.
My blush grew warmer. "I will, alphie,"
He went to his side of the car, looking at me the whole time. Then he looked at Tracy and Blair as he opened the door. I knew he wanted to tell them to protect me and hoped he wouldn't. He knew I hoped that, and he didn't say anything.
Blair knew what he wanted to say though, because she said, "Don't worry alpha dog. Lots of people all night long thought I was a boy, so the Beta dog, will watch out for your pretty flea for you."
His eyes frowned for a nanosecond, but then he flashed his smile and said, "See ya round, Trace, Blair. Tomorrow, pretty bug."
19: Go Over It Again
When the car was gone Blair and Tracy's silly laughter got even louder.
"Just Shut Up Already!"
Blair pretended to try, but Tracy didn't respond at all. Instead she said, "You two make such a cute couple, Jordie. It's wonderful!"
"Can we just talk about the MacGuffin? OK?"
Tracy put her arms around my neck and said, "OK. What is it you want to do, Jorie?"
Blair said, "Yeah, Humphrey, but, so why is this your case anyway?"
"Just go over and look around the shed at the country club, Tracy. See if the MacGuffin's still there."
Blair said, "What? You think Kipperman just left it laying in the grass?"
I almost told her the MacGuffin isn't a chicken, but didn't. "There's a way to get inside."
"Oh boy. Breaking and entering. I haven't committed a felony in months."
"Look, Blair, you don't have to come, all right?"
"No, no. I told your alpha dog I'd help you. Lead on, MacDuff."
She got the quote wrong! We had discussed that before too. She probably only did it to annoy me, so I didn't say anything. Besides I didn't want to talk about MacDuff laying on MacBeth any more than I wanted the laying chickens discussion right now.
"But, Jordan, really, why is this your job? Let the police handle it, is all. This isn't a story book! Do you really think you're a Hardy Boy - or I mean Nancy Drew - or something?"
I used a squeaky voice to out sarcasm her. "No, I don't think I'm Nancy Drew or something.
"You don't have to do it if you don't want to! Blair, you're the one that got pulled in this morning. You're one of the people whose footprints they found last night. You're the person that was wearing the white jacket last night, and that's the clue the cops are looking for. And the cops are looking for me too. But if you don't care, just go away. I didn't want to ask you to come anyway."
I had kept moving as we talked and had pulled them almost to the golf course fence, near where Andy and I had sat down only a little while ago, but it seemed even darker under the trees now than it had then. Maybe it was clouding up, but I could see the moonlight glistening brightly on the grass of the fairways, and each distant copse was a shadow island in an eerie, glowing, pea green sea.
I did want some company and ever since the mall I felt closer to Tracy, a lot closer than I did to Blair anyway. "Tracy, do you want to come?"
Tracy was staring at Blair with moon-dog eyes.
Blair said, "OK, Jordan. We'll do your 'case'. Let's go back to the clearing and talk about it. We should make plans."
"No! I'd have to talk to everyone about everything. I'm going to the shed. Come or go. Whatever."
Tracy said, "Wait, Jorie. Please. If you don't want to go to the fire ring, let's go to Starbuck's and talk. We should talk about it."
"Tracy, we can talk about it on the way to the shed if you want to come. I haven't done enough on it all day."
"But, Jorie, I don't really know what is going on. Can we sit down and talk about what you've discovered."
Tracy was half way sitting next to a tree already, and she tugged on my arm to get me to sit next to her. I gave in, and she moved to be right next to me with one hand petting my hair. Her other hand held on to Blair's wrist, the way she would have held the arm of child who wanted to escape.
"Trace, that's the whole thing. I haven't really discovered anything at all. But the cops, crazy cops, tried to arrest Andy and me. They chased me all over town this morning after Kipperman pointed me out to them. And I'm being followed all over town by those kids. And Pike wants to kill me. It's got to be a huge gang."
Blair stood by us, looking down on us, holding one set of fingers in her jeans' pocket, but she had stopped trying to pull her other arm away from Tracy's grip.
Tracy was rubbing my neck now. "OK. Let's start at the beginning. OK? Someone broke a window, took the MacGuffin, then told the police it was you two."
"Uhh. No. There was glass in the MacGuffin's box. So it was gone before the window was broken, but the window must have been set up to throw the cops off, right? But finding the people who broke it - maybe - we could find out who told them to break it."
Blair asked, "And how do you know about this glass?" I couldn't see her face well in the dark, but I could hear the sneer in her voice.
"I looked in the cop's data base. But they don't even seem to be looking into that."
Tracy said, "You got into the police computers?!"
"Only for a couple of minutes." I didn't tell them how I'd missed that opportunity too.
"Did they say anything in there about you by name?"
"Not me, and only about Blair being confined to home, and for all cops to watch and follow her. Which is a contradiction, huh? That's why she needed to be disguised. And I couldn't find out who told them Blair had a white sports coat, or why the Lieutenant arrested her."
"I don't think that was that Lieutenant. It was this other cop, and she showed up and then they let me go right away."
"But she's in charge of the investigation, and she was in charge of those asshole cops tonight. Was it two guys named Chuck and Kyle that arrested you?"
"I wasn't arrested, Jordan. Just questioned. And I just told them I'd taken the jacket off last night, and didn't know where it was. I didn't mention you. And how would I know their first names?"
"I'm just trying to figure out how many crooked cops there are in on this whole thing. OK."
Blair snorted. "You should be a right wing talk show guy. There's conspiracies everywhere, huh?"
"You explain it then!!"
Tracy cut in. "But, Jorie, we do know who broke the window. It was Pike. Remember, Jojo said he broke one screwing around."
Gaw, he had! OK, well I hadn't really had any time to think about things, had I?"
"But that doesn't sound like a plot or anything," Tracy added.
"Except that he just happened to be screwing around at just the right time."
Tracy was on Pike's side for some reason. "Or the wrong time. It got Kipperman pissed at them."
"But we don't really know that Pike's window was the one in the room where the MacGuffin was. Or, umm, maybe Kipperman didn't want the MacGuffin's disappearance to show up last night. I guess that makes sense. And those two stoners, Syd and Lori, were with them too!" I had just blown off what Lori had said. Stupid.
Blair said, "We don't really know the MacGuffin hasn't been missing for months either."
Blair was just being snide, but she was right. "OK. But if he took it earlier, Kipperman must have hidden it in the shed for all that time. More reasons to go look there."
Tracy said, "Not months. The reason it was at the country club was because of a display for the Forth of July thing, and my brother was joking about them still having the display up, showing it off, last weekend."
"We'll have to talk to Lori about the broken window, and see if it's that one. But if the window isn't a lead, what is? Who ever told them that Blair had that jacket was in on it, but that name wasn't in the cop computer. It just said, 'a friend at Northfield Hi.'"
Blair said, "There's an informant at school! Some narc."
"Yeah."
Blair sat on her heels. She let go of Tracy - even though Tracy was touching me - and started drawing lines in the dirt with her finger. Her wheels were turning at last!
She said, "OK. But that doesn't make it some crazy cop internal affairs thing. They were looking for the jacket anyway. . ."
"That was because of Kipperman. It was on the computer that he reported that."
"So really that just means the cops are hiding the identity of who told them I have a white coat. Nothing there, Jordan."
"But at least some cops are in on it! Those two that chased me this morning and stopped Andy tonight, and that lieutenant."
Tracy said, "Probably not the same cops. They don't work twenty-four seven, and I can't see it being Lieutenant Stern. I mean she really has something up her ass, all right, but it's too far up it for her to go bad."
"And she is Mr. Friend's girlfriend," Blair added, and they both laughed.
"It is weird he would have a real hard assed cop girlfriend. He's always on the kid's side when there is trouble."
"It's weird he would have any," Tracy said, "but he works with the police a lot. Tracking kids on probation and stuff. And, Jorie, he isn't the same for everyone that he is for you, really."
"That stuff he tries to get people into is so they will have good college apps and resumes. He got me into Honors English," I said.
"Ooohh," Blair said, "we are all impressed, and he must be cool then."
"You could be in it too, Blair, if you wanted to be! If you tried! You think being dumb is an accomplishment! But Mr. Friend kept those two cops from checking on the pills they found."
"What pills?" Tracy asked, and I filled her in on the pills I found in Kipperman's truck.
"Jordan! I should have given those back to him. I could get in huge crap for taking stuff from the cars. Let me have them."
"I - umm - Mr. Friend kept them. I don't think anyone will know where they went. They were in a piece of note paper down behind a seat and probably were lost a long time ago. Really, Trace. And they might not be Kipperman's but one of the kids' that works for him. If they were his worker's would you have wanted to give them to him?"
Tracy bit her lip.
Blair said, "Tracy, they are Jordan's estrogen pills. He's just making that up."
"Oh! Shut Up, Blair!" She knew better than that. I think she did anyway.
"So then, Andy told the cops they were my birth control pills."
While Blair snickered I said, "Because they thought I was a girl! And to explain why I didn't want them to find them. And Mr. Friend talked them into not looking them up on their computers."
"Did Mr. Friend know what they were? What did they look like."
Blair said, "Tiny and pink. With a picture of a Siamese dancer on them. Looked like trannie pills to me. You can just tell us, Jordan."
"It looked more like a snake on them to me, and that is what Officer Benwell thought it was too."
Tracy said, "I've never seen any like that."
"OK, look. I don't really think the pills have anything to do with the MacGuffin, right? They might not be illegal, and I'll try to find out on my computer. I was just curious if Kipperman had some deadly disease or something."
"Na-uh. You're right about that. They wouldn't be Kipperman's, not in that little truck. But they weren't X or anything. They might be legal."
Blair said, "So all we really know is the broken window had nothing to do with it. And Kipperman told them it was us, but not why he said that."
"So they wouldn't start looking at him."
"Yeah, we were handy. But the guys that broke the window were handier. Why not them?"
"Because he'd hired them. And because, if the police thought it was them, they still would have looked for it in the shed. He didn't want the cops going there. Which means we should!"
Both of them just stared at me. I jumped up and said, "Let's go!" and they actually followed me.
I marched along the country club fence. The thick brush of the forest on one side blocked out all light. A few glimpses of the sky showed no stars, no clouds, only areas of deep, deep blue-black, which somehow shone with darkness. The thinner layer of trees across the fence allowed frequent views of the expanses of grass beyond. Expanses that still glowed with an eerie green light. Expanses we would have to cross to reach our goal.
Tracy walked with both her hands on Blair's shoulders and arms. Blair moved with her head erect, shoulders back, and arms swinging. They whispered to each other the whole time, and they gradually fell behind me, but they did keep following. This felt almost normal: them together, me with them but apart. But this time I wasn't behind or off to the side, I was leading -- that was different. And it felt sort of like a mutiny.
We came to the passage onto the golf course, a well known hole in the fence, still deep in the trees. I pulled the chain links apart and waited for them. Blair pulled on the other side of the gap while Tracy crawled through. Then she made an elaborate swoop with her arm to say: "You first. I am gallant."
I rolled my eyes, or actually my whole head, but it was probably too dark for her to see the gesture. Then when I was crawling through the hole she stuck her finger between my thighs and jerked it up between my cheeks.
I lunged through the hole and fell to the ground. "Damn you, asshole!"
She roared with laughter like an idiot.
Tracy asked me what she had done, and I said, "The fucking creep goosed me!"
Still laughing, Blair said, "Well, it's an important lesson for you to learn, little alpha's flea. If you wear tiny, baby blue, baby doll dresses, hide your pretty patties. You didn't get to learn that when you were a little girl, huh?"
"Just fuck you!Fuck off!I'm just doing this for the MacGuffin.I don't care what you think.It was your fucking idea!"
"Hey, come on guys!" Tracy said.
I said, "You almost managed to pretend to be human again for a while. Prick!"
"It was my idea to get you out of the park instead of into jail, Jordan. It wasn't my fucking idea for you to run around like that all day, in mini-dresses. It wasn't my fucking idea for you to have a huge cache of clothes in your closet and fake tits too. It wasn't my ideas for you to do this all the time for years without ever telling me or anyone."
"Yeah, well, look how you've acted, and I knew you would be a total asshole bastard, Blair."
"Huh? How could you know that? How? You know, I thought we were friends, Jordan. Stupid idiot me."
"You saw me once and were a total asshole the whole night then too."
"When?"
"Halloween. When I was a bride. Do you think I was stupid enough to go through that again? Even on cross-dress day at nerd camp I kept as far from you as I could."
"I was eleven!"
"Twelve. Seventh grade. That's why I never went trick-or-treating with you again."
"Jord, I thought you would think I was weird if I didn't say things like that. I thought you looked great, but I couldn't tell you that, could I? And I don't want you to stop dressing like a girl either, if you want too."
"Oh, thank you sooo, so much. Like I need your fucking approval, ever."
"You told Tracy you would stop if I wanted you to. That's why I said that, jerk!"
"Well, you know what? That was back when I thought you mattered, I guess."
Tracy broke in. "Hey, guys, come on. Stop. We've got important stuff to do, right, Jorie? Come on."
Blair said, "Well, I don't care if you dress like a 'ho. Why should I? But I don't like trotting along behind you like a minion in some kind of adventure movie - no, it's one of your noir things, right.
"Look I didn't look for all of this. And I didn't invent it. And I didn't like getting chased by squad cars, but I did. I don't like getting followed all over town, but I have been, and someone has been telling them where I'll be all the time, all the effing time. I don't like getting tied up on the street by cops with my underwear showing for the world to look at. . ."
"Underwear!" Blair said with the fakest laugh I've ever heard, "They're Panties, Jordan. You are wearing panties and a super short dress, and you like it!"
…And I don't like it when my friend - someone I thought was a friend - gets their house raided at dawn and taken in by the cops for nothing. And I don't like your shit. Your constant shit. I don't care if you're jealous of me. And I don't care what the hell you like or don't like anymore. Just go away."
I walked off, and I didn't look at them. I worked my way though the trees without turning around. I didn't care what they were doing. Not at all. I reached the edge of the trees and kept walking just under them without looking back. They didn't matter at all. I had to do this, and would alone if I had to. I didn't even glance back.
When I got to a sand trap Tracy kissed Blair, pull away from her, and started trotting after me. Blair watched her and then turned and went back into the trees. Good riddance to her!
Tracy caught up to me and said, "It's OK, Jorie. She's had a bad day, you know."
"SHE has! Tell me about it. But don't -- I don't want to talk or think about her."
"Yeah. She didn't do that well as a boy, and I had to tell Jojo and Hancock about her and that it was a joke. But then Heather Davies came on to her and. . ."
"Yuck!" I said, "But I don't care, Trace. I really don't. Just forget her. You don't have to, but I am. Let's go. OK?"
"Yeah, OK, Jor. We're still BFFs, very best GIRL friends, right?"
I nodded. "If you want."
She grinned and kissed my nose and wiped some moisture from my cheek. It must have been really humid out here. I was sweating more than I thought.
I hugged her.
We stayed under the trees, going the long way, skirting the edge of the florescent sea of grass and holding hands the whole way. Only once did we have to step into the moon light. We trotted over the fairway and gnats and dew lapped around our ankles. When we reached the safety of he trees again we grinned and sighed and hugged each other, but neither of us spoke until we reached the back of the garden shed.
Tracy said, "There's no alarms and no one here right?"
I started to nod.
Someone inside the building screamed, "NO, GODDAMN IT!"
Many, many thanks to my friends and great betareaders/editors, Kristina and Daphne, and to everyone who has ever commented on a story, mine or anyone's, and to all the patient readers who are still here with me.