Author's notes:

As always: (1) I don't care what the devs say, Alisaie is absolutely not 16. By 6.0, she'd be about 23. (2) In a world where no one is explicitly gay or trans, that means anyone can be. Therefore, Alisaie and G'raha are T4T. (3) My WoL is a non-binary viera.

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----

POST 7.0 - AFTER DEFEATING BLACK CAT IN THE ARCADION

Black Cat's expression was a mix of resentment and consternation as she watched me sign the paperwork agreeing to the next match and hand it back to Metem. "Wonderful! I'll let you know when the match is scheduled," the Millala said, waving over his shoulder as he left. "Pleasure doing business with you, Master Merouc."

"Unbelievable," Black Cat muttered as soon as he was gone. "I can't believe he didn't warn you."

I turned back toward her and arched an eyebrow at her. "Warn me?"

Unaccountably, Black Cat blushed. "Well. It's just. Everyone from Solution Nine would already know this, but. Since you're not from here..."

I crossed my arms impatiently. "Spit it out. Do I need to get those forms back from Metem?"

"No! I mean." Black Cat held up her hands and took a deep breath. "It's just. You'll want to arrange to have one of your mates attend the match. And if not, well... you've already got lots of fans, and I could. If you like. Make some introductions?"

I stared blankly at Black Cat for several long, extremely awkward moments. "I swear I'm not trying to be obtuse," I finally said. "I just... I'm not following your meaning."

The Hhetsarro fighter's ears flattened as she turned an even brighter shade of pink. "Honey's feral soul is a bee."

I blinked. Was this one of those situations where my demisexuality was making me inconveniently immune to subtext? "And?"

"She. Uh. Uses pheremones."

My own cheeks flushed hotly as comprehension finally dawned. "Ah. I see." I thought back to the similar situation I'd encountered fighting Lakshmi, after which I had sourced a recipe for pheremone-negating potions. "I'll be sure to take the appropriate precautions. Thank you for your consideration."

Black Cat looked relieved. "Honey makes Metem a lot of money, so everyone is just used to dealing with the inevitable consequences. I don't think anyone was trying to screw you over. It's just easy to forget that it wouldn't be obvious to outsiders."

"I understand."

"Tell your guest to check in with admissions, and you'll both be provided with a private room after the match. That is, assuming Honey doesn't. You know. Kill you."

I didn't bother to correct Black Cat's assumption that I'd need to rut after my match with Honey - the conversation was already uncomfortable enough. "She's welcome to try. She won't succeed."

Black Cat grinned. "You'd better kick her ass," she said cheerfully, extending a hand. "I only want to get beaten by the best."

"You've got it." I grinned back and shook her hand. "She won't know what hit her."

I called Ojika as I left to request the ingredients for the pheromone potion be delivered to my rooms, then called Alisaie, figuring better safe than sorry.

"Savvel! How bad did you demolish your opponent?"

"She gave me a nice workout."

Alisaie snorted. "Nice to hear it wasn't a complete waste of your time. I can't say I understand why the savior of the whole bloody star finds it necessary to smack around some two-bit regional arena fighters."

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "Now, now. Be nice. Raubahn came as one of those 'two-bit fighters'."

"I suppose."

"Anyway, I called to ask if you wanted to come to the next match?"

"Of course! What kind of a question is that? I always love watching you thrash people."

"Great. So apparently..."

- - -

I'll admit I enjoyed watching the smug look on Honey's face turn to panic when the first hit of pheromones had no effect. Almost as much as she must have enjoyed the look of panic on my face when she unexpectedly hit me with a second blast halfway through the match. The potion mitigated most of it, but my pants still started to feel far too tight.

Pushing all thoughts of physical discomfort out of my mind, I snarled and lunged forward, making Honey squeak in alarm as she barely fluttered out of the way. I'd gotten worse when I'd fought Lakshmi, and Honey was no primal. Besides, it wasn't likely she'd have the energy to hit with a third blast.

...she hit me with a third blast. Right as one of the simulated champions and I tag-teamed her, knocking her out cold. A couple of seconds later, the simulacra vanished, leaving me on my own.

I buttoned my Red Mage's coat and tried not to look as uncomfortable as I felt while Metem pronounced me the winner.

- - -

Metem took me out a different way than I'd come in, escorting me to a doorway in what looked to be a dormitory for resident champions. "Take as long as you need," he murmured, not making eye contact as he trundled off.

I was sweating and my cock felt as if it were being strangled by my pants, but I couldn't face the prospect of going in like this. Not yet. With a groan, I banged my head against the wall and linkpearled Alisaie.

"Savvel? What's going on? Where are you? They showed me to this room and said you'd be joining me, and then they just... vanished."

"I need you to promise not to laugh at me," I said, concentrating on the cold metal of the wall against my forehead in an attempt to focus on something besides my increasing state of sexual frustration. It didn't work.

"Okay..."

"I'm serious," I snapped, picturing the bemused face that I knew would have gone with that tone.

"Alright! I promise."

I activated the door and slunk in, finding Alisaie standing in the middle of a small room with a very large bed, a tiny bathroom, and nothing else. And I did not pounce on her - much as she would have enjoyed that - because I was determined to prove that I could maintain some dignity , dammit, no matter the ridiculous circumstances that had gotten me here. "I wanted to show them that they don't need to use souls to be strong," I said stiffly.

(That's not all that's...) Woodenly.

We'll show her some...

Dammit all , even my inner monologue was betraying me.

With a start, I realized Alisaie had been watching me with a confused expression on her face. "Okay," she said, obviously not for the first time.

"I don't like the idea of a bunch of traumatized kids huffing someone's grandma so they can beat the shit out of each other longer and make the sponsors a few more gil."

Alisaie choked back a laugh. "Sorry. Your phrasing was really funny, there."

I smiled despite myself. "I was trying to make you laugh," I admitted. "But here's the part that's not funny." I unbuttoned my coat and tossed it on the floor before gesturing miserably at my erection. "After what happened with Lakshmi, I had potions that I thought would be strong enough, but... Insect pheromones are apparently a lot more potent."

Alisaie's eyes widened. "Oh dear." Understanding dawned on her face, and to my immense relief she didn't seem to find the situation funny at all. "Well. This is definitely one of the weirder ways I've been asked to assist with one of your crusades, but weaning the surviving Alexandrians from their soul addiction is an admirable goal. So! Let's see what we're working with."

I groaned with relief and shoved both pants and drawers down past my hips, too impatient to bother with the fastenings. My cock was painfully erect by this point and dripping pre. "I'm so hard it hurts," I whimpered.

"It's not painful if I touch it, is it?" Alisaie asked, licking tentatively at the head of my cock.

I moaned loudly and fisted my hands at my sides to keep myself from grabbing her head. "N-no."

"Good. Get the rest of those clothes off, and get on the bed."

- - -

I was so hypersensitive that Alisaie sucked me for all of a minute before swallowing down my first orgasm, which didn't even make a dent in the blood-fever that gripped me. She kept going until I came again, which took enough of the edge off that my erection was no longer painful, but didn't do anything to alleviate the raw need screaming through every nerve ending.

I threw an arm over my eyes and moaned with despair. "If these are breeding pheromones, then..."

"Blowjobs might not be enough," Alisaie finished. When I opened my eyes, she was eyeing me speculatively, and I could tell she was trying to decide if she was up for bottoming when I was in this state.

I shook my head. "I can't promise not to be rough. I'm literally on a mind-altering substance, remember?"

"Fair," Alisaie sighed as she rolled onto her side and reached for her earring. "G'raha? Don't panic, because Savvel is going to be fine. But they're having an emergency and you're needed in Solution Nine right away.

"Mmhmm. The Arcadion.

"Tell them you're here for Savvel. Please hurry."

The entire exchange took less than a minute, and yet I was almost crawling out of my skin again. "I'm so sorry, but it's starting to hurt again."

Alisaie's blue eyes flashed with anger. "I'm going to tear strips off of whoever thought it was okay to let you go into this blind."

She definitely wasn't wrong. "And I'll help, but I can't do that if my dick explodes."

"Right. Sorry."

As if the entire situation wasn't mortifying enough, the door whooshed open right as I came for a third time, allowing my shouting to echo around the corridor. G'raha froze in the doorway, eyes wide with confusion, and only entered when Alisaie waved him over. (Thankfully, the door closed itself behind him.)

"This is the emergency?"

I hid my face with my hands and would have curled into a ball if a significant portion of Alisaie's weight hadn't already been on my legs. "Don't laugh," I pleaded.

Alisaie spoke, her voice rippling with anger and disbelief. "Savvel got a super dose of insect pheromones, and blowjobs are only providing temporary relief. I've already made them come three times, and yet..." She trailed off, presumably gesturing at my dick, which remained hard enough to drive nails.

"Well then." I almost cried with relief when I recognized G'raha's Thinking About A Very Serious Problem Voice. "If they were breeding pheromones, then I'm not surprised."

"Black Cat did offer to set me up with some female groupies," I mumbled, wishing the void would just claim me then and there and end my suffering. "Apparently all of the other arena fighters are just used to dealing with it. And when Alisaie showed up, I guess everyone thought it was. You know. Handled."

I finally summoned the nerve to peek at G'raha, and couldn't help but melt a little when I saw his shoulders stiffen with resolve. "I'm glad you called me, then. It's not safe to leave you like this. Give me..." G'raha's tail lashed as he did some rapid mental calculations. "Twenty minutes to be. Ah. Less male."

"G'raha, no ," I yelped, horrified at the idea of reducing his gender - both our genders to the biological imperative of reproduction. "You don't have to..."

"I know," he interrupted forcefully. "But you have trouble with people you don't care about--"

"But--"

"--and I'm a consenting adult. So shut up and let Alisaie take care of you while I prepare some things."

- - -

I held out as long as I could before getting Alisaie to blow me for a fourth time. She used every trick in the book to make it last as long as she could, but I was on a hair trigger - refractory period be damned - and was starting to get uncomfortable again by the time the door opened. A leggy Hhetsarro readhead walked in, who I only belatedly recognized as G'raha .

"Holy hells , Raha," I breathed, levering myself up on my elbows, my erection momentarily forgotten.

G'raha's unbraided hair hung loose over his shoulders, a stark contrast to the black corset, which had been cinched enough to give him a more feminine shape, and a pair of very skimpy black drawers. That on its own would have been sexy as hell, but someone had also given him makeup - a fairly simple face, but expertly contoured to soften his masculine features. It was an astonishing transformation, considering how little time he'd taken.

Alisaie looked as stunned as I felt. " Fuck , Raha. You look... incredible."

G'raha blushed adorably. "I couldn't do anything about these," he said, gesturing to his ears and tail. "So..." I couldn't take my eyes off him as he padded over and stretched out on the bed next to me, then gently pulled my face toward his neck. "Come here and smell this."

I inhaled cautiously, smelling perfume and... something else. Something I couldn't identify, but which eased the pain in my cock slightly. "Gods," I groaned, driving my face into the crook of his neck. "What is that?"

He cleared his throat. "Scent from one of your female viera... admirers."

A hot, sickly wave of shame washed over me. I wanted to pull away, but I couldn't seem to make myself let go of G'raha. Entirely contrary to my will, my body seemed to move on its own as I pulled myself tightly against him, wanting to feel his skin on every inch of my body. "That's... incredibly humiliating."

G'raha made a sympathetic noise and shifted so that I could wrap my leg around one of his. "I understand how you feel, but let me at least assure you that her consent was extremely and unambiguously enthusiastic."

I whimpered and rutted my erection against his leg. "That's nice, but it doesn't stop me from hating every second of this."

"Your reaction confirms some things for me, so..." G'raha stroked my hair soothingly. "I know this is a fraught subject for you, but. You're going to have to get me pregnant."

My cock felt as if it had been hit by lightning. I grit my teeth and squirmed with discomfort at the intense rush of arousal his statement provoked, even though breeding had always been a hard line for me in our bedroom play, and spent the next several moments wrestling down the urge to tear G'raha's drawers off and start fucking him that instant.

I was a human , not some rutting beast! I hadn't let my own people reduce me to a biological imperative, and I'd be damned if I let some two-bit arena "champion" take that from me after I'd beaten her.

"You're a man!" I wailed. "And a Mi'quote!"

"That doesn't invalidate my gender - men can and do get pregnant. I could get pregnant with another Mi'quote."

It seemed very important to win this argument, but it was hard to argue with a nearly-naked G'raha even when my cock wasn't stealing all the blood from my brain, and under the present circumstances... "I'm not--"

"It's my choice." G'raha forced my head up so that I could see his face, and my heart contracted at the love and worry I saw reflected in his eyes. "Savvel, I know you left home because you couldn't stand the thought of being a breeder. But breeding is what these pheromones are compelling you to do right now, and breeding with me is the best and safest way to get you through this. If you hate it, we don't ever have to do it again. But while it's happening... try to think of it as a safe way to explore something you've always been horrified by."

I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. "That... makes a lot of sense," I grumbled reluctantly.

Alisaie startled me when she spoke up. "Should I go? I mean, I'd happily stay because... fuck , you two are so hot right now. But... should I go?"

I blushed hotly and was faintly amazed that I had enough blood left anywhere else in my body to do so. "You don't have to leave. It's common for viera women who are in season to. Uh. Share the males when they come around."

Alisaie was trying very hard not to smile, and not quite succeeding. "So if I cheer you two on and talk up how much I want you to put a baby in me next..."

I whined with pain as my discomfort ratched up several notches. "Yes. Please. That. Can we get to the fucking now, please?"

G'raha grimaced and started removing his drawers. "Up against the headboard. You'll be able to smell me better if I ride you while you're sitting up."

I shimmied backward and propped a pillow behind my back as I got into position. I was dimly aware of Alisaie shedding her own clothing, but couldn't take my eyes off of G'raha as he crawled up the bed, straddled me, and ground against my cock.

I humiliated myself by pushing my face into his neck and coming from that alone.

It did, at least, do a better job of relieving my discomfort than Alisaie's mouth, but... "I need to come inside you, Raha," I pleaded.

"My apologies. I'll admit, I wasn't expecting you to be quite that sensitive." G'raha swiped his hand through the spend on my chest, used it to lubricate my cock, and sunk down onto me, taking my entire length at once.

I sobbed with relief and arched my back as he braced his hands on the headboard and started to ride me.

"That's it, love. Time to breed." He leaned forward so that his neck would be close to my face as he fucked me, and I just about died from how good he smelled. "I'm going to milk that cock of yours. Get you to fill me right up with cum, make me nice and pregnant."

I shuddered, horrified at hearing this kind of talk from G'raha, but I couldn't deny the wave of pleasure that hit me, or stop myself from bucking up to meet him.

"I think Savvel likes that," Alisaie cooed. "Keep going."

"That's it, love," G'raha said encouragingly. "You want to put a baby in me, don't you?"

I moaned and nodded frantically. My cock was steadily leaking into G'raha by this point, the juices of my arousal causing him to squelch softly as he rode me, making me feel as if I was indeed being milked.

"Think of Raha with your baby inside him, walking around with that cute little pregnant waddle," Alisaie added. "And what his belly would look like as he's bouncing on your cock."

I moaned even louder at the image, despite its deep emotional repugnance, as my orgasm loomed over me.

"That's it. Let go," Alisaie said in a low, husky voice. I could imagine her hand wrapped around her cock, but I couldn't let go of G'raha, could only cling to him helplessly and desperately drank in his scent as I tried not to die from sheer pleasure. "Shoot your seed nice and deep, and then you can breed me."

That did it.

I cried out, every muscle in my body spasming in pleasure as I spent inside G'raha, then collapsed limply against the headboard and desperately tried to catch my breath. This time, I felt the blessed sensation of my cock starting to soften, though the need was still there, lurking around the edges. "One more, I think," I panted, then winced. "But also... off . I'm starting to chafe."

G'raha kissed my forehead and pulled off of me, and Alisaie extended a hand to use some healing magic on my poor, abused member.

There were tears running down my face that I couldn't stop. "I hate that I like this so much," I whined. "I know you said it's okay, but it feels so wrong."

G'raha shushed me and pet my hair. "It's okay, love. It's all pretend, and we don't ever have to do this again once you're done."

" Good ," I replied fervently.

Alisaie looked up at me as she let the flow of magic stop. "Feel better?"

I looked down at my cock (which was starting to stiffen again from the residual tingling of healing energies now that the pain was gone) and sighed gustily. "I don't feel like I'm losing my mind anymore, but I definitely need one more. And I think me fucking Raha this time will help the most."

Alisaie moved aside to give us more space before she resumed stroking her own fully-hard cock. "Any objection to letting me finish in your mouth when they're done, Raha? If I can be patient that long, that is."

G'raha smiled at Alisaie as he lay back and spread his legs. "Of course not."

" Gods , Raha, I don't deserve you." I covered him and pressed my cock back into him with a groan. And it was good, it was always good, but... "Damn. I'm pretty overstimulated." I whined in frustration as I tried to find an angle that wasn't so sensitive. "I need to come, but it's going to be. Uh. Difficult." I corrected myself at the last second to cut off Alisaie's inevitable pun.

"It's okay, love. We'll get you there," G'raha murmured gently as he pulled my face back toward his neck. I inhaled deeply, and that helped, but not as much as what Alisaie said next.

"You won't be able to fuck Raha in that position for long once he's pregnant, you know. Too much pressure on his stomach."

I groaned with pleasure as the friction of G'raha's hole against my cock became markedly less painful. "Yes. More," I gasped.

"Raha might not want to keep the tits, but mine will get nice and big when you put a baby in me too."

"You'll have to fuck us on all fours," G'raha said quickly, continuing the scenario.

"Or have us ride your cock."

"Think of how good Alisaie's big, pregnant tits will look while she's bouncing on your dick."

It didn't make any sense, I knew it didn't make any fucking sense, but my cock didn't care. Something about the mental image of an impossibly-pregnant Alisaie bouncing on my cock with milk-heavy breasts drove me crazy. It seemed to drive G'raha crazy too - he started moaning as Alisaie went on to describe the things I could do to her swollen body, and I could tell that G'raha would come if we changed position.

I pulled out of G'raha abruptly and flipped him over. "I want you to come," I panted, tugging urgently on his hips.

Thankfully, he knew what I wanted and was eager to oblige. He scrambled onto all fours, plunged two fingers into himself, then started stroking his dick as I fucked back into him.

My brain was pudding by that point, and I would have said just about anything. Still, I definitely wasn't expecting to hear myself ask, "w-will our kids call you Daddy?"

G'raha moaned and thrust back against me. "Yes. But I can't be a Daddy if you don't get me pregnant, so hurry up and put that baby in me."

"Come for me, then, and make me believe you want it!"

G'raha moaned loudly and threw his head back as he lost the rhythm of our movement, and a moment later he cried out and clenched around me. I shouted loud enough that they probably heard it on the First, buried my cock to the hilt inside him, and spent what felt like a river of cum. As soon as Raha subsided, I went limp and flopped onto my back, panting as if I'd just run a marathon.

G'raha flopped onto his stomach beside me. "A moment," he gasped. He took half a minute to catch his breath, then flipped onto his back and opened his mouth.

Alisaie groaned and immediately started fucking his face. At any other time, the sight of her small, perfect breasts jiggling as she thrust into G'raha's lewdly sucking mouth would have been impossibly enticing. But while I felt emotionally moved by the frustration she had endured to help me, my cock felt as if it might never stir again.

Thank the Gods.

Alisaie thrust about a dozen times, then made G'raha take her up to the root as she came down his throat. "Fuck," she groaned. "I'm sorry to benefit from your suffering, Savvel, but that was so fucking hot."

I whimpered, and G'raha had to prevent me from curling into a ball by octopusing himself around me. "I never. Want to do that. Again."

- - -

I slept until the next day and woke up to tea and a nice breakfast. "It's for a good cause," Alisaie said, cutting off my grumpiness. "And your next opponent is a big, dumb bully who uses a bomb for his feral soul, so no worries about a repeat of all this."

"Thank the Gods," I muttered, tearing into the feast laid out in front of me.

There was silence for a minute as we enjoyed our meal. Then Alisaie cleared her throat. "What if... what if I fought her? Honey," she added, when we didn't immediately take her meaning.

G'raha (who was back in his masculine attire, to my immense relief) raised an eyebrow. "Go on."

Alisaie smiled. "You can find a nice Elezen to sit on your face during my fight so you smell right while I'm fucking you, and I won't be in such a bad state because this time we'll know how to handle it."

G'raha took a sip of tea as he considered. "I'd want to skip the drag. Fucking in a corset isn't something I'd like to do again." I put my head in my hands, and grit my teeth to keep from apologizing (which I had been forbidden to do). When I had mastered myself, G'raha was watching me with a sympathetic expression.

"I understand why you hate it, Savvel. But we're different people, with different experiences. I never had the same issues with breeding that you did because I left home, and then I transitioned, and I pass well enough to call myself a Tia. And it's not something I'd want to do regularly, or with anyone other than the two of you, but... It was fun." G'raha smiled and gave me a mischievous wink. "And I look forward to doing it with Alisaie, because I think she'll be much filthier."

"You know it," Alisaie quipped. "And, drag or no drag - either way is just as hot for me."

"Then sure. Sounds fun." G'raha twinkled at Alisaie, then turned his gaze back on me. "Should we count you out?"

My lovers gave me space to think as I searched my feelings. The idea of a frantically desperate Alisaie did sound very appealing, but the idea of engaging with more breeding play made me uncomfortable. "I'd like to watch, but not participate, I think. It sounds hot, I just... don't want to engage with it."

"Great." Alisiae gave me a too-innocent smile before looking back at G'raha. "I'll start mixing up a big batch of baby batter." She cackled when I gagged and G'raha choked on a mouthful of tea.

I glared at Alisaie and waved a finger at her impotently. "I take it back. That was repugnant, and if you say anything like that around me before the fight, I'll have Metem ban you from the arena. And he'll do it, because he needs to keep me happy!"

Alisaie just waggled her eyebrows at me. "Understood."

---

End Notes:

Hat tip to whoever on Tumblr made the joke about huffing grandma - I couldn't find the post again to credit them.

Alisaie's last line is something I read while researching this fic and will haunt me until I fucking die.

Notes:

1. I am aware that the devs claim that everything from 2.0 through Dawntrail has taken less than a year, and I call bullshit. Plot mentions of transit time (four months sailing to Doma, three months to Sharlyan) reveals this to be dev laziness, pure and simple. You can't tell me I ended a 1000 year war, liberated two nations on different continents from their colonial oppressors, traveled to an alternate dimension to prevent a future where I died, went to the moon and the literal edge of existence to stop the end of the world, and traveled the length and breadth of the fantasy equivalent of North and South America... All in less than one year. No. Absolutely not. No way.
So I'm ignoring that. My personal headcanon is that it's been as long in-game as it's been in the real world. Ish.

2. My WoL is a non-binary viera.

3. Follow my in-progress writing ramblings on Bluesky: @ashthestampede.bsky.social | Support my writing on Patreon & read ongoing chapters of my original works 2 months before they're released anywhere else: patreon.com/ashkreider

GHIMLYT

The war camp was a flurry of preparations. It took effort to keep my expression light as I made my way through the camp to the final strategy meeting before the assault, not wanting the rank and file to see their vaunted "Champion of Eorzea" as anything other than the fearless paragon I was supposed to be.

How was I supposed to be a symbol of hope when I was struggling to hold onto it myself?

Were the others here, we could have easily held off half an Imperial Legion with just Scions alone, but now only two of us remained to take the field. Would it be enough?

After all, Papalymo wasn't here to pull a rabbit out of his hat this time.

"Please, Hydaelyn. Let that damnable voice stay away until after the battle is finished," I muttered to myself, making a furtive gesture of warding.

Alisaie appeared out of the hustle and bustle, falling into step beside me. "Ready to frighten some Garleans?" she asked with breezy self-assurance, giving me a smile that was equally parts teasing and challenging.

Gods. She really had changed so much in the two years we'd known each other, hadn't she? When we'd first met in Ul'dah, she'd been a surly teenager so uncertain of her identity that she'd settled for being a pale imitation of her twin, despite being entirely unsuited to being a scholar or an Arcanist. And now here she was, a Red Mage nearly on par with my own strength, and a seasoned campaigner to boot.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

Shit. I hadn't meant to stare. "I'm just. I'm glad you're here," I said awkwardly.

Alisaie blushed and looked away. "Well I couldn't very well abandon you, could I?"

I smiled. "And I'm grateful to have you at my back, but I do feel rather naked without the other Scions here."

"I wouldn't mind seeing that," Alisaie quipped, mischief dancing in her eyes as she looked back up at me with a suggestive smile.

Unaccountably, I tripped over my own foot.

Alisaie grinned at my discomfort and broke into a jog. "Come on then," she called over her shoulder. "Or they'll get started without us!"

My heart thudded painfully in my chest as I stared after her for a long moment.

What the hell had just happened?

- - -

It says a lot about the life I've lived since coming to Eorzea that Garlean invasions were starting to feel old hat, but. Well.

Hien and Yugiri talked me up to their countrymen, whose contingent I would be fighting with. Raubahn gave the usual stirring speech. And then it was over, and all there was left to do was wait.

When the council was over, Raubahn joined Pippin in his futile attempts to convince Nanamo to retire from the field while the other worthies scattered to attend to their own business, once more leaving me alone with Alisaie.

"I should be terrified," she mused, crossing her arms as she surveyed the rest of the camp. "But with you at our side, I can't help but feel everything is going to be all right."

I shrugged, unable to muster any other response, and she turned to pin me with a glare.

"So don't you dare leave me alone."

My stomach did a slow swan dive as I stared into her piercingly blue eyes, and I only belatedly remembered to nod.

That seemed to satisfy her, at least. "No matter what happens, we have to survive," she said in a steely voice. "Together."

Was I blushing? I might have been blushing. "I promise," I said hoarsely.

Alisaie nodded jerkily, then turned away as she self-consciously made a show of checking her equipment.

I did the same as I wrestled with my feelings.

What in the hells was I thinking? Alisaie was a... Well, technically she wasn't a child, but at my age, using the fact that she was eighteen to justify any kind of relationship would be nothing but rank sophistry, and we both knew it.

"I have to get my head back in the game," I muttered to myself, scrubbing my hand across my face.

And then, without warning, that electric, obliterating pain was back - like someone was trying to yank my soul out through my nostrils.

:THE LIGHT WILL EXPUNGE ALL LIFE.:

"No!" Alisaie gasped, turning back toward me. She staggered, clutching her skull in pain. "Not now!"

:ONLY YOU CAN FORESTALL THE CALAMITY.:

Pain. Pain and fear and pain, and panic in Alisaie's eyes that mirrored my own. "Don't," I gasped. She reached for me, and I struggled to reach back, the movement causing bolts of agony to cascade down my arm. "You can't--"

:THROW. WIDE. THE GATES.:

Alisaie's face was a mask of anguish. "Not like--"

She collapsed like a puppet with her strings cut, and the voice vanished as it made off with its prize. I crawled over - when had I fallen? - and pulled her into my lap. She was breathing, thank the Gods. But I knew that I was holding nothing more than an empty shell.

I was alone.

- - -

AMH ARENG

I'd finally arrived at Journey's Head, only to be told that Alisaie wasn't there. So back into the sands I went.

The sky was too damned bright in the First, and the reflection off the sand was nearly blinding. I should have sent Feo Ul to the Source to request a pair of smoked glasses from Tataru before setting out from the Crystarium, but it was too late for that now.

How typically Alisaie to hare off to the literal edge of the world in search of adventure after finding herself stranded in an alien world.

I could have waited, I suppose. But despite the Exarch's promise that my friends were whole and well, I needed to see her. I needed to know that she-- that they were all okay.

I spent a good twenty minutes trudging through the sands, sword and focus at the ready, before I finally spotted the tell-tale flurry of alabaster wings. However, before I could move to intercept, a familiar voice rang out from somewhere above me. I looked up just in time to see someone leap from the top of an old watch tower, some twenty-five feet up, to plunge a long blade into the sin eater's back.

Alisaie!

I was seized with relief so intense that for a moment I felt dizzy. She was okay!

Better than okay, actually. I'd never seen her make a leap like that before, and there was more strength behind her blows as she took on the weakened sin eater.

I clapped as she finished the monster with a final well-placed thrust. "Impressive!"

"Just a lesser eater," Alisaie she said with studied diffidence, keeping her back to me as she sheathed her blade. "Nothing to write home about."

"Not happy to see me then?" I teased.

"I knew you'd turn up sooner or later, but I had been hoping for sooner," she shot back, her smile as wry as ever.

The fact that she'd be angry with me for distracting her while out on patrol was the only thing that kept me from sweeping her into a giant hug. As it was, I knew I was grinning stupidly and didn't much care. "It's so good to see you."

Alisaie turned away, ostensibly to study the horizon, but the set of her shoulders betrayed her fraying control over her emotions. "Come on then. We can catch up after we finish patrolling."

- - -

Tesleen lit up when she saw us return together. Tesleen and Alisaie were obviously close, because Tesleen immediately started needling her friend extensively about how much she'd missed me, and Alisaie didn't once threaten to stab her.

"I respect Savvel's methods!" Alisaie finally cried, throwing her hands up in disgust.

Tesleen's laughter echoed around the small shelter, and then the conversation took a turn I hadn't expected. "After seeing them in action, I can understand why. The way they leap into the fray without hesitation, it really is something to behold! I might be a little smitten myself!"

Alisaie turned red right up to her hairline and stalked off.

There was a long silence as Tesleen watched me with a knowing look.

"Smitten," I said flatly.

It wasn't a question, but the blonde carer heard what I was asking anyway. "I said I was a little smitten. Her feelings go well beyond that."

I swallowed as I recalled the way she'd smiled in the Ghimlyt camp when she said she wanted to see me naked.

Oh. Oh.

Oh no.

- - -

I tossed and turned that night, plagued by dreams of sin eaters in Garlean uniforms, and woke feeling tired and grumpy.

Over breakfast, we were asked to acquire some supplies at the market, so off we went - the Champion of Eorzea and their heroic companion - to slay the dreaded provision beast. Thankfully, the need to be on the lookout for flying eaters precluded any awkward conversations about feelings, and we fell easily into our old rhythm as we made the hour long trek to the Suq, only relaxing once we'd passed through its thick stone walls.

Our needs were simple. Fresh fruit, particularly nectarines. But Alisaie looked so sad as she carefully packed the delicate fruit into her bag that I realized there had been a hidden significance to the request that I had missed entirely.

"Alisaie..." I began, placing a hand on her shoulder. When she didn't shake it off, I drew her into a hug, thinking only to offer comfort.

However, instead of resisting, Alisaie threw her arms around my neck and hauled me into a deep kiss.

It felt like being struck by lightning. I gasped as her lips moved on mine, parted them reflexively when she licked into her mouth. She pulled herself tightly against me and kissed me like I was the only thing keeping her from drowning, and everything fell away but the feeling of her soft lips and our tongues sliding against one another.

I may have moaned in her mouth.

Which may, had it happened, have emboldened her. Or it may have simply been her own initiative that led to her grab my butt.

With a groan, I broke the kiss and held her at arm's length. "We can't do this," I said sternly, even as the sight of her kiss-swollen lips made me want to kiss her more.

Alisaie took this as well as expected, which is to say not well. "Why not?" she demanded, her expression thunderous.

"You're a child." I'd meant to sound implacable. Unyielding. But my voice came out thin and pleading.

"I'm not a child," she shot back heatedly. "For the love of Thaliak, did you forget the extra year I lived here? I'll be twenty in a few weeks!"

"That doesn't make it right," I growled. My face was on fire, which I can't imagine helped my argument much. "You're so much younger than me."

Alisaie gave ground - it definitely wasn't a retreat - crossed her arms, and glared at me. "Oh and that makes me too impressionable, does it?" she scoffed. "Do you seriously think you could make me do anything I didn't want to do?"

No. I didn't. But I wasn't going to tell her that.

Alisaie's eyes narrowed. "Tell me you don't want me, and I'll drop it," she said in glacial tones.

Shit. Fuck. Shit. There was no point in denying it - she'd know I was lying. She always knew. "Tesleen is waiting," I finally said helplessly.

Alisaie snorted in satisfaction as she shouldered the bag with our purchases, roundly ignoring my attempt to take the bag myself. "We are not done talking about this," she said, jabbing me in the sternum. Hard.

- - -

Alisaie walked in furious silence for the first half hour, and I'd just about resigned myself to days of the silent treatment when she cleared her throat. "Did you know I'm trans?"

I blinked in surprise, but continued scanning around us - the last thing we needed was to get jumped by bandits or coyotes. "No."

She shrugged. "Most people don't. I don't like to talk about it. People get weird, and I've got better things to do than argue about the shape of my genitals." Her voice was less edged than it had been as she glanced over at me, but still I didn't meet her gaze. "Point is, I've put a lot of thought into 'who I am' and 'what I want'. More than most of the Scions combined, I'd wager. Discounting Urianger, of course."

I couldn't help but look surprised as I glanced over at her. She caught me looking and smiled sweetly.

Alisaie one, Champion of Eorzea zero.

- - -

Dinner was... Well. Not exactly pleasant, although there were pleasant moments - the food was delicious, and Alisaie and Tesleen were good company. It was impossible, however, to forget the inn's purpose as the carers circulated to see to their largely silent charges. And yet, these people were determined to seize whatever small scraps of happiness they could find, no matter the bleak fate in store for them.

After dinner, Tesleen went to settle her charges before bed, leaving Alisaie and I alone.

"Elezen don't hit full growth until their mid to late twenties, you know."

I nodded warily but said nothing.

"There's a Hume convention called the Rule of Seven. Have you heard of it?"

"Vaguely."

"A rule of thumb for determining social acceptability of age difference in relationships. It's said that you shouldn't be with someone who is less than half your age plus seven."

I sighed. "Okay. Where are you going with this?"

"Would you sleep with Thancred?"

I wrinkled my nose in distaste. "Not my type. He's pretty enough, but I'm not into men who brood."

Alisaie huffed impatiently. "If he was your type then, would you?"

"I suppose."

"The Rule of Seven says you shouldn't sleep with him, or any of the other Scions for that matter. And yet, I seriously doubt you'd tell Y'shtola she wasn't old enough to know what she wanted if she ever propositioned you." Alisaie pinned me with a sharp look. "Applying the social standards of shorter lived races to Elezen and Viera doesn't make sense, because past a certain point it all becomes arbitrary anyway."

Unable to find fault in her logic, I shifted uncomfortably and said nothing.

"That's what I thought," she said smugly before getting up to help help Tesleen.

I went for a walk to clear my head.

When I returned, one of the carers directed me to an unused bunk. I hung my coat from the end and sat down to pull off my boots, only to be startled by Alisaie appearing out of the gloom with a stack of blankets. "It gets cold at night. You'll want these"

"Thank you," I said stiffly.

She calmly handed me the blankets. "So what's the magic number? Twenty one? Twenty two? Twenty five?"

"It's not about a number," I said wearily. "It's about experience. Or lack of it, in your case." The last came out more sharply than I'd intended, and Alisaie pursed her lips in displeasure.

She leaned forward, arms crossed. "I've known you a long time, Warrior of Light, and I'm positive that I've had more sexual partners than you," she said, clearly trying to shock me.

It worked. "What... I mean. How--"

She cut me off with another of her edged smiles. "You only sleep with people you have a strong bond with. I, on the other hand, have sucked so. Many. Dicks." She paused for emphasis, fluttered her eyelashes at me, and slowly licked her lips. "And I'm very good at it."

Trying not to think of Alisaie's pretty mouth wrapped around my cock was like not thinking about a pink elephant - utterly impossible once the image had been conjured. I held myself utterly still, trying not to react to the dizzying rush of arousal I felt as my pants suddenly grew far too tight. Unfortunately, my lack of rebuttal only gave her room to press her advantage.

Alisaie held my gaze as she raised a finger to her lips and delicately circled the tip with her tongue before sucking it into her mouth with a soft slurping noise.

Oh Gods oh Gods oh Gods.

My face was on fire. I couldn't breathe, couldn't think of anything but the fantasy of blue eyes on mine as my cock sunk into the wet heat of her mouth.

Alisaie slowly withdrew her finger, then pointedly looked down at the ridge of my erection, which was starkly visible through the pristine white pants I loved wearing with my Red Mage's coat. "Hmm."

Point made, she left me alone for the rest of the night.

- - -

The following morning, Halric escaped.

Tesleen looked stricken when she found out. True, he had so little time left before his condition rendered mercy a necessity, lest he transform and continue the cycle that spawned new sin eaters. And yet, he was a child who deserved to be more than the infection gnawing at his soul, and who deserved a more gentle death than vanishing down the maw of a wild beast, or having what little of him remained consumed by an eater.

Alisaie and I paused only long enough to arm ourselves before joining Tesleen in the search. I went North and East, Alisaie North and West, and Tesleen took the promontory to the South.

Tesleen found him first.

Her cry of fury rang out over the dunes, and I scrambled as fast as I could toward the sound, cursing at the difficulty of running on sand. I crested a rise, made eye contact with Alisaie as she rounded a towering rock formation, and we both arrived just in time to watch the horrible scene unfold without any ability to stop it.

Tesleen had faced off against an enormous eater - a stern, imposing angel in alabaster armor - despite being clearly overmatched. She interposed herself between the creature and Halric as the eater's sword came down, managing to knock the blade aside, but wasn't able to parry the riposte that impaled her.

Alisaie and I stood frozen in horror as the color immediately began to seep from her face like wet paint being washed from a canvas as Tesleen rapidly transformed from a bright, compassionate young woman into a white, winged horror.

The eater lingered to watch its handiwork from a safe height, somehow remaining aloft despite the wing that Tesleen had sliced off, then flew off once the transformation was complete.

Tesleen...

The eater that had once been Tesleen lingered. Horrible, human-sounding noises emerged from its mouth. And then it said Alisaie's name. With a strangled cry, Alisaie darted forward before I could stop her, but Not-Tesleen was already aloft and following after her maker.

Halric was eerily, utterly silent as he watched the retreating eaters.

Alisaie - that brave, fierce woman who abhorred making any show of emotion - collapsed to her knees and wept.

Woodenly, I went to my knees beside her to offer my shoulder. She clung to me, sobbed for half a minute, then stood and mastered herself with grim determination. "We have to get Halric back," she rasped. " We... we have to tell the others."

I nodded, and Alisaie gently took Halric's hand and led him back toward Journey's Head.

I followed mutely behind, sword at the ready, and ached for her suffering, which I realized was a twin to my own. When faced with the evils of the world, we loved too hard, felt too deeply, and subsumed the pain of inevitable loss into helping people.

I wished she had let me hold her longer.

- - -

Alisaie was withdrawn with grief as we started our journey back to the Crystarium. The only sign of spirit she showed were the furious glares she gave me when I attempted to offer comfort.

As we passed the rest of our journey in silence, I couldn't help but miss her attempts at seduction.

Not that I had changed my mind.

- - -

EULMORE

Alisaie sent me to fetch her brother by myself, claiming that she had business to attend to in the Crystarium. So I went alone, hoping that she would find the space she needed to grieve while I was gone. It was good to see Alphinaud alive and well after so many months of worrying, but if I was being honest with myself, his presence only made me feel Alisaie's absence more keenly.

After far too much effort, we finally won our admission to the so-called Final City by successfully convincing a noble couple that Alphinaud was the painter they needed to immortalize their love for the occasion of their anniversary. As I spent most of that first day roaming the city and talking to its inhabitants, I once more wished that Alisaie were with me - keeping her from punching nobles would have made it easier for me not to punch them myself.

That evening I discovered that even a lowly "painter's assistant" rated a private chamber with a bed large enough to sleep five comfortably. Given a choice, I would have taken the austerity of Journey's Head and the pleasure of good company over being subjected to such ludicrous opulence in solitude.

My thoughts inevitably returned to Alisaie as I tried to settle myself for sleep, which summoned the memory of her bragging about her prowess at sucking dicks. My cock slowly stiffened as my traitorous brain replayed the memory of Alisaie suggestively sucking her finger at me over and over again. Finally, knowing that I wouldn't be able to sleep until I'd gotten myself off, I sighed, sat up, and retrieved a vial of lamp oil from my bag. I poured some out onto my hand, before pulling up my nightgown and taking myself in hand.

Since thinking about Alisaie would have been all but admitting defeat, I summoned the thought of Aymeric instead, and the quickie we'd had for old times' sake in his office the last time I'd visited. I held the image of him firmly in mind as I started to stroke myself slowly, forcing myself to crowd out my desire for Alisaie with the memory of Aymeric.

His mouth had been firm and insistent on mine as we'd kissed, kisses that had quickly gone from tender to frenetic. We'd torn each other's clothes off in a frenzy of urgency, and I'd taken him over his desk.

My breathing quickened and my strokes grew faster as I forced myself to recall the encounter in vivid detail. The way he had wriggled impatiently against me as I worked him open with my fingers. The gasp he'd made as I slowly sunk my cock into him. The arch of his back, and his low moan when he'd taken me fully. The demands of his schedule had been too great for seduction or subtlety, but Aymeric had been so needy, so desperate to be fucked that neither of us had minded. I'd gripped his hips tight enough to leave bruises, bruises I knew he'd relish, and he'd thrust back to meet me as I pounded into him.

Gods dammit all, I hadn't gotten quite enough oil.

Impatiently, I poured more onto my hand, getting more than I intended, and resumed my stroking. I tried to remember how it had felt as he'd writhed and moaned underneath me, but the overly-slick sensation of too much oil brought with it the image of a wet mouth engulfing me. My thumb became a tongue flicking across the head of my cock, my tightening grip the pressure of obscene sucking.

I couldn't hold back my release. With my last fragment of will, I told myself that it was black hair, not white, that I pictured falling over ice-blue eyes that looked at me with smug satisfaction.

- - -

LAKELAND

Our business in Eulmore was concluded abruptly and unpleasantly with our forced precipitous departure from the city. And, as is the way of things, our reunion with Alisaie and the Exarch was followed by a series of emergencies too urgent to ignore, culminating with the sin eater attack on Holminster Switch.

It seemed only right that Alisaie was at my side as we rushed to save those we could from the eaters as they swarmed through the village. Tesleen was there, one of many eaters who fell beneath our blades, but Alisaie didn't falter for a moment.

Gods, I was proud of her.

We pressed on, and when the time came I plunged my sword into the Lightwarden's chest, absorbing the light-aspected aether that erupted from it with my Blessing of Light.

And then it was over.

Alisaie had turned away from the others, her shoulders shaking with tears she wouldn't allow anyone to see. I knew I should stay away, that I was too tired and too heart-sore to continue keeping her at arm's length. But given a choice between heartlessness and foolishness, I'll choose foolishness every time.

Her face tipped up toward mine as I folded her into my arms. "Just now, you let me fight at your side and risk my very soul to help you save two worlds. How is it that that's okay, but having sex with me isn't?"

I shook my head and smiled sadly. "You know I don't have an answer to that."

"I've thought long and hard about who I am and what I want," she said, somehow tender and fierce and entreating all at the same time. "My opinions are grounded in a lot of life experience, more than most people get in a lifetime, and I am not easily influenced. And I know that you want me." She paused to wipe away the tears she hadn't been able to stop from spilling over. "And I'm very sad about my friend, so stop being stupid and just kiss me already."

I swallowed, feeling as if I was stepping off the edge of a precipice too high to see what awaited below. "We... I can't make promises."

"I'm not asking for love eternal and a white picket fence. I know that's not who you are, just as it's not who I am. All I'm asking for is right here. Right now. Tomorrow can take care of itself."

"Then I yield to your superior logic," I murmured as I bent to meet her lips.

She tangled her fingers through my hair as she kissed me with unexpected gentleness, and somehow I was the one who melted into her arms.

It was a relief, then, when I surfaced for air and saw her looking as stunned as I felt. That is, until she licked her lips and smiled up at me through half-lidded eyes. "Does that mean I can finally suck your dick?"

"I don't see how I could stop you," I said with a resigned sigh, doing my best to ignore my cock's enthusiastic endorsement of the notion.

"If you're going to be like that, then I don't think I want to after all," Alisaie snapped.

"You're right," I said quickly with a grimace. "That was ungracious of me."

Alisaie's expression shifted from annoyed to calculating. "You do want it then?" she purred, palming the front of my trousers, smirking in triumph when I didn't quite stifle a moan.

Mortified, I looked around for Alphinaud and was glad to see that he was deeply engrossed in a conversation with Lyna and the Exarch. "Yes. Not now, obviously. But yes."

"Of course, but." She smiled sweetly and patted my cheek. "You'll need to say please."

I gently but firmly disengaged, putting several feet between us, and buttoned my heavy Red Mage's coat to hide my now considerable erection. "You, madame. Are a menace," I muttered darkly.

Alisaie winked as she turned to join the others. "Only because you like it."