Keeping It Fluid -5

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The roads were slick with melting snow as we drove through the city, the car heater blasting warmth into the chilly air. The buildings outside grew taller, glass windows reflecting the overcast sky. I leaned my forehead against the cold window, watching as we passed rows of stores and restaurants, their neon signs blinking against the gray afternoon.

"We're almost there," Mom announced from the driver's seat, turning on her blinker as we approached a massive parking lot.

I sat up straighter, my stomach twisting with a mix of excitement and nerves. I had never been here before.

Outside, a massive structure stretched as far as I could see, its walls lined with huge advertisements for different stores, restaurants, and even an indoor amusement park. The glass entrance doors were constantly revolving with people coming and going, bundled up in winter coats, their breath fogging in the air.

Lily practically vibrated with excitement beside me. "It's huuuuge!" she exclaimed, pressing her face against the car window.

Sam, sitting next to her, smirked. "You act like you've never been here before."

"I haven't been here in forever," she shot back. "Last time, I was like, six. And I didn't get to ride any of the cool rides!"

Mom chuckled as she pulled into a parking spot. "Well, we're not here for just rides. We have shopping to do first."

Lily groaned dramatically but didn't argue.

As soon as we stepped out of the car, the cold hit me like a wall, my breath turning to mist. We hurried inside through the glass doors, and the moment we stepped into the main atrium, I stopped in my tracks.

The place was massive.

Multiple levels stretched above us, each floor lined with gleaming glass railings that overlooked the vast central area. Shiny storefronts with bold lettering and neon signs framed the walkways, their displays full of mannequins dressed in the latest styles. A massive skylight loomed overhead, its arched panes casting streaks of soft, golden light that shimmered against the polished tile floor.

But the real spectacle sat right in the middle of it all—an entire indoor theme park, alive with movement and sound. A roller coaster twisted and looped between trees and flashing billboards, its bright orange track weaving dangerously close to other rides. Carnival lights blinked in rapid succession, illuminating the rides and game stalls, where kids tugged their parents toward oversized plush prizes.

The scent of cinnamon pretzels and buttered popcorn mixed with the crisp, new-clothes aroma of the surrounding stores. It was overwhelming—but also kind of incredible.

And just when I thought it couldn't get any more surreal, a life-sized SpongeBob SquarePants waddled past, his foam costume swaying with each exaggerated step. He waved at a group of excited kids, his wide, frozen grin somehow both cheerful and unsettling.

"Alright," Mom said, pulling off her gloves. "We have a few things to get done first. Sam, you need new jeans, right?"

Sam sighed. "Yeah. I grew again."

Mom turned to me. "Emily, you need anything?"

I hesitated, shifting on my feet. "Um... I guess I could use some new sweaters?"

Mom smiled. "Perfect. And Lily, you already know you need new shoes."

Lily groaned. "But I don't want new shoes."

"You literally have a hole in your boot," Sam pointed out.

Lily scowled. "That's called character."

Mom raised an eyebrow. "It's called a hole. And you're getting new shoes."

Lily huffed but didn't argue.

The first store we hit was a department store, where Mom sent Sam off to the men's section while she took Lily and me to find sweaters and shoes.

I still wasn't used to shopping like this—with someone actually wanting to buy me things. For so long, I'd only ever gotten clothes secondhand or from charity drives, and because of my 'birth-mother', I'd learned not to be picky.

Now, though, Mom actually wanted me to pick things out for myself.

I ran my fingers over a rack of soft knit sweaters, my gaze lingering on one in particular—dark green with a cable-knit pattern. It looked warm. Cozy.

Mom must've noticed, because she pulled it off the rack and held it up. "You like this one?"

I swallowed, nodding. "Yeah... I do."

She smiled and handed it to me. "Then we'll get it."

Just like that. No hesitation. No sighing about the price. No telling me to hurry up and pick something else.

For a moment, I didn't know what to do with that.

Lily, meanwhile, was in full drama mode over the shoe selection.

"These are too stiff," she complained, putting down a pair of sneakers. "And these are too pink. And these are—"

"Lily," Mom said, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Just pick a pair that fit."

Lily crossed her arms. "They also have to have vibes."

I snorted, shaking my head as I folded my sweater over my arm.

Eventually, Lily found a pair of boots that apparently passed her vibe check, and we met up with Sam again, who had already picked out jeans and was looking thoroughly done with shopping.

"Can we get food now?" he asked.

Mom checked her watch. "Actually, yeah, we're right on time for lunch."

Lily perked up. "Oooh, can we get pretzels?"

Mom shook her head. "Real food first, then snacks."

Lily pouted but didn't argue.

The food court was chaos.

People bustled between the different counters, balancing trays piled with burgers, pizza, and steaming bowls of noodles. The air was thick with the smell of fried food and fresh bread.

We managed to grab a table, and soon enough, we were all digging into our food—Mom and Sam had sandwiches, I had a bowl of soup, and Lily had somehow convinced Mom to let her get a slice of pizza and chicken nuggets.

"This place is kind of crazy," I admitted, looking around at the sheer size of everything.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, it's like a city inside a city."

"I think it's awesome," Lily said through a mouthful of pizza.

Mom chuckled, her gaze drifting upward as if lost in a memory. "I remember coming here when I was your age," she said, a nostalgic smile creeping onto her face. "Back then, the park was called Camp Snoopy. Everything was themed around the Peanuts gang—Charlie Brown, Lucy, Linus, and Snoopy himself. It felt like stepping straight into one of the comic strips. The rides were different too—smaller, maybe, but just as exciting."

Her eyes swept across the flashing lights and twisting tracks of the new rides. "It's wild seeing how much has changed. Back then, Camp Snoopy felt huge—but looking at this now? I think they've outdone themselves."

I stirred my soup, taking in everything. The noise, the movement, the sheer energy of it all. The theme park buzzed with life—roller coasters rattling overhead, flashing lights blinking in rapid succession, kids shrieking with delight as they darted between game booths and cotton candy stands. The air smelled like cinnamon pretzels and buttered popcorn, blending strangely with the warm, savory steam rising from my bowl.

I lifted my spoon, but my gaze caught on something across the food court.

There he was again—SpongeBob SquarePants, or at least some poor soul stuck inside the giant foam costume, waddling past with exaggerated, bouncy steps. He waved at a few kids, his wide, frozen grin unchanging, his oversized blue eyes almost too bright under the artificial lights. One kid ran up and hugged his spongy leg, and for a second, SpongeBob just stood there before dramatically patting the kid's head like he was in a cartoon.

I huffed a quiet laugh and took a slow sip of my soup.

I had spent so much of my life trying not to take up space—trying to blend into the background, to keep quiet, to not be a problem. But here? Here, it was impossible not to take up space.

And for the first time, I didn't feel like I had to make myself smaller.

I took a deep breath and smiled. "I think I kind of like it."

Mom gave me a warm look. "Good."

And as we sat there, surrounded by the buzz of people, the clatter of trays, and the laughter of kids on the rides nearby, I let myself just be.

As soon as we finished eating, Lily wiped her hands on a napkin and turned to Mom with wide, hopeful eyes.

"Can we go on the rides now?" she asked, practically bouncing in her seat.

Mom raised an eyebrow. "I thought we were here to shop."

Lily gasped dramatically. "That was before I remembered there was a whole amusement park inside!" She turned to me and Sam for backup. "Right, guys? We should totally go on at least one ride!"

Sam leaned back in his chair, smirking. "I'm good."

Lily groaned. "You're so boring."

Mom sighed, clearly debating whether or not she wanted to spend the next hour chasing us around a theme park.

I hesitated, glancing toward the giant indoor amusement park visible from the food court. Twisting coasters, bright flashing lights, and the distant sound of kids screaming as they plunged down a log ride—it was a lot.

But then I looked at Lily's face—pure, hopeful excitement.

She had so much energy, so much confidence. And honestly? I kind of envied her for it.

I took a deep breath and shrugged. "I'd go on a ride."

Lily gasped, grabbing my arm. "YES! SEE? Emily wants to go!"

Mom sighed but smiled. "Alright, alright. One ride."

Lily pumped her fist in victory. "YES! You're the best, Mom."

The amusement park smelled like cotton candy, popcorn, and that weird mix of rubber and metal that all theme parks seemed to have. Lily practically dragged me through the crowd, weaving between families and kids clutching oversized stuffed animals from game booths.

The place was huge, and everywhere I looked, there were Nickelodeon characters staring back at me. A giant slime fountain sat in the center, bubbling with a bright green glow, and a massive statue of SpongeBob grinned down from above a ride entrance.

"Okay, okay, which ride first?" Lily said, spinning in place as she tried to take in everything at once.

I barely had time to think before she pointed at a spinning roller coaster, its bright orange tracks looping through the air. The sign read:

The Fairly OddCoaster.

My stomach dropped just looking at it. The cars were teacup-style, which meant they spun while moving on the tracks.

"That one!" Lily declared, practically bouncing.

I swallowed. "Of course you picked the one that spins in every possible direction."

Mom chuckled. "You sure about this one, Emily?"

I wasn't. But Lily looked so excited, and after everything she'd done to make me feel welcome, I kind of wanted to do this for her.

I sighed. "Yeah. Let's do it."

Lily squealed and grabbed my arm, dragging me toward the line.

The second the lap bar clicked into place, I knew I had made a mistake.

"This is gonna be AWESOME!" Lily cheered beside me.

The ride lurched forward, climbing the first hill. I gripped the lap bar as we neared the top, my stomach twisting.

Then we dropped—and the car spun.

The world blurred as we twisted and turned, the coaster dipping through neon-colored tunnels and over bright blue tracks. Somewhere in the distance, I saw a giant Timmy Turner face staring at me, which only made the whole experience weirder.

Lily was cackling. I was clinging to the lap bar for dear life.

"I CHANGED MY MIND!" I yelled as we whipped around a curve.

"TOO LATE!" Lily howled with laughter.

The car spun again, sending us into a dizzying spiral. I squeezed my eyes shut for a second before forcing myself to look at Lily.

She had the biggest grin on her face, her hair whipping around wildly. She wasn't scared at all. She was free.

And somehow, despite my stomach flipping in every possible direction, I started laughing too.

By the time we pulled into the station, my legs were shaky, and I was a little dizzy, but... I didn't hate it.

Lily jumped out of the car, beaming. "THAT. WAS. AMAZING."

I stumbled after her. "That was something, alright."

Mom met us at the exit, smirking. "How was it?"

Lily threw her arms in the air. "Best. Ride. EVER."

Mom looked at me. "And you?"

I took a breath, still feeling the world tilt slightly. But then I smiled. "I survived."

Mom laughed, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as we started walking. "That's all that matters."

Before I could fully recover, Lily was already planning our next ride.

"Oooh! Let's do SpongeBob SquarePants Rock Bottom Plunge!"

I turned to see a bright blue and yellow roller coaster, its cars shaped like SpongeBob's pineapple house. It had a near-vertical drop that made my stomach lurch just looking at it.

"Hard pass," I said immediately.

Lily pouted, then spun around and pointed at another one. "Avatar Airbender!"

I followed her gaze and felt my soul leave my body. It was a huge halfpipe, with ride cars shaped like Aang's air scooter. The whole thing spun while swinging back and forth.

"Nope. Absolutely not."

Lily groaned. "You're so lame."

"Pick something that doesn't make me want to throw up, and we'll talk."

She huffed, crossing her arms, but then her eyes landed on something else. "What about Dora's Rescue Adventure?"

I turned and saw a slow-moving indoor ride, themed around Dora the Explorer.

I smirked. "That, I can handle."

Lily gasped. "Wait, no! That was a joke! I don't want to go on baby rides!"

Mom laughed. "Well, maybe next time you'll pick something everyone likes."

Lily groaned dramatically, but I just smiled.

Maybe I wasn't as fearless as Lily. Maybe I wasn't ready for SpongeBob drops or Avatar spins.

But I had survived one ride.

And that was enough.

After barely surviving The Fairly OddCoaster, I decided I was done with rides for the day.

Lily, of course, was not.

The second she spotted Blue's Skidoo, a gentle spinning ride themed after Blue's Clues, she immediately dragged Sam along instead. He rolled his eyes but didn't fight her on it—probably figuring it was easier to let her burn off energy than argue.

Mom and I found a bench nearby, overlooking the amusement park. The neon lights flickered above us, and the distant roar of a roller coaster filled the air. Kids ran past clutching plush toys, and the smell of popcorn mixed with the sugary scent of cotton candy.

For a while, we just sat there, watching.

Then Mom glanced at me. "You holding up okay?"

I shrugged, still feeling the slight dizziness from earlier. "Yeah. Just... rides aren't really my thing."

Mom smiled. "That's okay. You don't have to love everything Lily does."

I picked at the edge of my sweater, the one Mom had bought for me earlier. "She's really something else, though."

Mom chuckled. "That she is."

I hesitated, watching as Lily and Sam boarded the ride, her excitement still buzzing even after hours of running around.

"I don't think I was ever like that," I admitted softly.

Mom tilted her head. "Like what?"

"Like Lily," I said. "So... carefree. Excited about everything."

Mom exhaled, nodding slowly. "You've had a different life than her."

I stared at my hands. "Yeah."

She didn't push me to say more, and I was grateful for that.

I took a deep breath. "It's just... weird, I guess. Being here. Doing this."

Mom's expression softened. "Weird how?"

I struggled to find the right words. "I guess... I just keep waiting for it to go away. For this to be temporary." I gestured toward the park, the mall, everything around us. "Like, I don't know—like one day, I'll wake up, and it won't be real anymore."

Mom was quiet for a moment before she spoke.

"It is real, Emily."

I swallowed hard, focusing on a patch of scuff marks on the tile floor. "I want to believe that."

Mom turned slightly, facing me. "I know you do. And I also know it's hard."

She reached out, gently squeezing my hand.

"I can't change the past," she said softly. "But I can tell you this—you're not going anywhere. This family? It's yours. Forever."

Something thick formed in my throat, and I wasn't sure what to do with it.

A few months ago, I would've pulled away. I wouldn't have believed her.

But now?

Now, I let her hold my hand.

Now, I let myself hope.

A loud ding sounded from across the park as Lily and Sam's ride came to a stop. Within seconds, Lily was bounding toward us, her face flushed with excitement.

"That was amazing!" she announced, grabbing my hands and practically swinging me off the bench. "Can we get ice cream before we leave? Pleeease?"

Mom laughed. "I suppose we can do that."

Lily cheered, already dragging Sam toward the food stands.

Mom stood up, looking at me again. "You ready to head out?"

I nodded, but before I followed her, I glanced around the amusement park one last time.

I still wasn't sure I fully believed it yet.

But maybe I was starting to.