Now before you jump to any conclusions. I don't know if I'm transgender or not. I have two cousins that are and I kind of date a girl who is. I really don't know where I myself personally fit on the whole gender spectrum. It's not something I'm prone to giving much thought too. Anyway, the story I'm going to recount to you is not about that! So let's not make it about that. This story is about how I came to be almost accepted in this rural township and how I kind of became the “Little Sister” of the cheerleader's of Benton Academy Varsity Cheerleading Squad. Kind of my personal initiation into the fabled “Pom-Pom Fortress” if I may. And maybe, I cracked my egg too.
-Act I-
Maybe I'm Cracking My Shell
“You look totally adorable!” Jamie said as she gazed toward me. “I don't know what you did with your hair. But girl, let me be the first to tell you. You're really rocking that bob haircut. I mean you looked cute before, but now you look adorable, heck maybe even hot, heck you could even pull off sexy if you had some high quality breast foams.”
I felt my cheeks flush with color as I gazed into the full length mirror that had been man-handled into the tent that was a make-shift changing room. Once more I'd found myself dressed in a Benton Academy cheerleading uniform. This time however, I was not chasing after a ghost. I was wearing it to settle a debt that I owed to a girl called Jamie Sarah Potter. As I peered at myself in the mirror and noticed the blush starting to bloom in my cheeks, I turned around and started to try different poses. And well I hated to say it, but I liked the way I looked.
“He sure does.” Another girl named Winter said as she entered the tent. “Wow, Jamie when you said your cousin could pull off this stunt. I thought for sure you were just pulling my leg. I mean I've seen him around school a lot and I've seen him around town too. And well I was never quite sure what to make of him. At first I thought he was a 'she' and 'she' was just a late bloomer. You know some girls don't get their first period till like seventeen or so. And well I thought she was a tomboy too, I mean with a name like 'Daisy' what else was I to expect?” Winter said with a lopsided smile.
“I mean no offense Daisy, it's just that you're really androgynous and that's why you catch hell all the time. That's why your always getting beaten up. I mean sure after you smashed the teeth out of 'The Beast' and thrashed one his henchmen nearly to death with your belt.. people have kind of backed off of you. I mean that not to say you won't catch hell if you were a girl. Because girls can be just as cruel as boys and girls tease and bully each other too. But they go about attacking their prey in an indirect way. So I'm not saying your life would be easier if you presented yourself as a girl. And boys love to use their fist so..” Winter was clearly rambling on.
“Winter.” Jamie said, sighing. “For just this evening let's just assume that Daisy is a girl. And that she is my newly adopted little sister. And after this, assume that Daisy is a girl and we've just granted her permission to enter into the 'Pom-Pom Fortress'. So from now on 'She' is under our protection of the squad. You're my second in command, so I kind of need your help.”
“Oh! Sure! Sorry! I totally did not mean to like to misgender her or anything!” Winter said, flushing red.
“It's fine..” I said blushing a little. And then from out of nowhere something just popped up.
“I kind of wish I did have breasts like you girls do though.”
A sudden and deafening silence filled the room the silence was only broken by Winter coughing as she pulled the flaps of the tent back. Without saying a word she made her way toward the exit. But before she left she turned around and leered toward Jamie and me.
“Okay Jamie, girlfriend, this is your boat to float. This is out of my league. I was born a girl, you kind of made that choice. I mean I guess you made that choice. I'm not sure how this stuff works. But you know how this stuff works. So you can offer help better than I can. Like I said before, I have always considered you a girl, I consider you my cheerleading sister, and I consider you my friend. But this is something that only you can help her with.”And with that she left.
“Did I say something wrong?” I said tilting my head to the side.
“No, you did not.” Jamie said as she went to fasten the flaps of the tent nice and tight. Once they were fastened she turned toward me. She then stepped in front of me and taking a deep breath she heaved a sigh.
“So, that little out of the blue comment you made. Was that made in jest? Or were pieces of your egg shell falling down and was something peeking out through the normally gray clouds that always seemed to surround you?” Jamie added as she folded her arms across her chest. “Cause I have to know, considering what I am and all the shit I've been through getting to this point in my life.” She added quickly.
“I don't know, Jamie, it honestly just popped into my head. But I kind of wish I did have breast like you and the others.” I paused. “And sometimes like late at night like right before I go to bed. I wonder how my life would have turned out if I'd been born a girl instead of you know a boy? Like, I don't know if my life has been better or would it have been worse? Would I've still been picked on a lot growing up? Or would I've been I don't know more accepted? Would I still be here at rustic, rural Benton Academy? Or would I still be enrolled at St. Katherine's Academy with my two sisters? Would I have developed a much closer relationship with my sister being a girl?” These questions just seemed to fall out of my mouth.
“First off.” Jamie Said, taking a deep breath. “You think way too much. That can be a good thing, because when it comes to things like this you need to do a lot of heavy thinking. But you also need to have somebody you can bounce ideas off of. When it comes to this, you need a group of friends that know you, that understand you and that love you to help think through this terrible mental jungle. And you do, you have Lily, Madeline, Heather, Pandora, Cerridwen, Kayla, your mother, your father, your two sisters and aunt and uncle, you have me, you have my mom, my dad, also last but not least you have Gwendoline who I think is kind of like Cerridwen a witch..”
I nodded my head.
“The main right now though, is for us to get through this fundraiser. Now, it's clear to me, by asking to step in and cover for Cerridwen, a few mental switches have been flipped. And me, being me, wants nothing more than to just call this whole thing off and sit you down and get to the bottom of these questions that you might be asking yourself. That is the big sister part of me. Now the other side just wants to tell you to put those questions away and just smile.” Jamie said as she started to rub her forehead.
“Okay..” I looked at myself once more in the mirror and once more I liked what I saw. Instead of an androgynous schoolboy I saw a young woman who was on the cusp of womanhood. She just needs to advance from humble but to flower and then the world would become her oyster. With a little bit of make-up, a tiny amount of luck and user her God given wit and her family connections she could wrap the whole wide world around her nimble little fingers. She could make all the boys Benton Academy dance like puppets on a string all for her pleasure.
This girl had already played Dotty and if she played her cards right she could go on to become this year's Homecoming Princess and then next year she could go to become next year's Homecoming Queen and then her senior year she would be crowned Prom Queen. Of course she would be appointed prefect and then made Headgirl!
“Daisy?” Jamie said, waving her hand in front of my face. “This is Earth to Daisy, this is the control center calling to Space Cadet Bell! Please come in Space Cadet Bell!”
“Huh?”
“You spaced out.” Jamie said, taking a deep breath. “You totally spaced out!”
“Sorry, I was just thinking, plus I've not been sleeping well. I've been having these really weird nightmares about this ghost nurse getting operated on. Like this evil, almost demonic looking nurse. Like she wears all black, like black dress, black pantyhose, black shoes, totally black from head to toe.” I said in a high pitched tone of voice.
“Oh!” Jamie said blinking “Oh! Oh! I get it now, you must have had an encounter with the fabled Nurse Spooky! That explains why you had to get that haircut when you got discharged from the hospital last week. Not that it was much of a haircut, Pandora did a really good job removing the split ends and making everything look nice and even.”
“...” I blinked. “How did you know?”
“I kind of put two and two together.” Jamie said, heaving a heavy sigh.
“I.. kind of did and I almost got murdered for my troubles!”
“Okay! It clear to me that we have a lot of catching up to do! And it also clear that are are way over your pretty little hair. It's also clear that you and Cerridwen need to have a talk. But let focus on what is in front of us shall we? We need to get through this fundraiser. And that requires you to pass as my little sister, and you do pass as my little sister.” Jamie said giving me the classic American sign for victory and a thumps and a wink.
“Jamie I'm confused! I'm scared! And I don't want to do this!” I said blushing a little. “I want to go home and hide in my closet! I want to go back into the egg! Please don't make me go out there dressed like this!”
“Daisy Isabella Bell.. I'm sorry to say this but we've crossed over the point of no return now. All of Benton is expecting to see my little sister out. Covered in a clear plastic tarp sitting in a plastic chair, getting ready to get a pudding pie in the face. Well it's supposed to be custard, but we had to use vanilla pudding instead of custard. Not that anybody will know the difference.” Jamie's voice trailed.
“Anyway they're expecting to see the same girl who volunteered to play Dotty, and plus you'll be sporting our newest uniform. They Were really sexy and cute and they did not go out of style in the eighties. And the squad expects you to bring in enough money to at least cover the gas that we'll need to haul our asses from Benton to Oxford this coming spring to attend spring training camp at Ole Miss.” Jamie said with a sigh.
“In other words..” I said blushing as I stood up.
“Listen! This totally blew right up in my face! Totally blew up in my face! Cerridwen was supposed to be the one sitting in the chair, I'd volunteered her for this, but right now she is sick in bed. And according to what her mom just texted me she might rush her to E.R if her fever does not break. She is running close to a hundred degree fever. And well you owed me a favor. Cause I let you borrow one of the old cheerleading uniforms we had laying around because you wanted to lure out Nurse Spooky!” Jamie said, rambling off the top of her head.
“Right..” I said standing up. “So.. one question.”
“If this is about the whole transition progress. I can't answer that question right off the top of my head! But I promise once this is over and done with. We'll have coffee and sit down and talk through this stuff! I promise.” Jamie said as she got down on her knees and peered into my eyes.
I blinked and tilted my head to the side and peered into Jamie's face.
“It is not about transitioning.” I said blinking in confusion.
“Oh?” Jamie said blushing. “What are your questions then?”
“Pigtails?” I said looking at myself in the mirror. “Or a high ponytail?”
“Pigtails.” Jamie said, smirking.
At that moment Winter popped her head into the tent and with a goofy smile she said.
“Pigtails for sure!” She added smirking.
And so I settled on Pigtails!
-Act II-
Pie a Benton Academy Cheerleader! Only Five Dollars!
I took a deep breath as I was ushered from the ten to a wooden chair. Jamie as always took charge and ordered me to sit down in a wooden chair. I did as she commanded, she then shook her head and told me to sit down again, this time she told me to fold my skirt under me before I sat down, it sounded like an odd request but I did as I was told. Jamie watched me like a hawk as I did as she requested. Once that was done she told me to bring my legs together as close as possible, it felt weird but I did as she told me. Once it was done she told me to fold my hands on my lap and to sit straight back.
I did as I was told. Winter watched on with mild amusement. Once Jamie was finished with her instructions, Winter walked over to me. She was holding a clear, plastic sheet that had been folded to her chest. Smiling, she unfolded the plastic sheet and soon she had it wrapped over me. She then pulled the sheet down around me, the sheet covered me totally from the neck down.
“I guess this will keep you clean. Well as clean as possible. You'll still need to wash your hair. And I would suggest that you use some baby shampoo first. Then I would go over that with your normal shampoo of choice. Cause you might want to look into the mirror while your washing your hair to make sure you don't miss anything. Cause the last thing you want to do is go to school with specks of dried pudding or lose pieces of pie crust still clinging in your hair.” Winter said smiling as she stepped aside.
“Also.” Winter snapped her fingers together. “Put your lips together.”
I did as I was told and a few seconds later I felt Winter smearing something on them. Something that had the faint taste of cherries or strawberries.
“Okay if you're going to be a girl full time. We gotta cover a few ground rules that every girl knows. Remember these rules, they will make you part of the herd. And once you become part of the herd, the chances of getting picked off by a wolf decreases sharply. First rule, you always, and I mean you always carry around a tube of lip gloss in your purse. Best to carry around two if not three at all times. The first one being your main one, the second one being your backup and the third one being one you can hand out to a girl if she needs one. Also even though you might never need them. You always need to carry around some form of pads. Just to have on you and some extra pads in case a girl asks you if she could borrow one. Trust me, it's just things girls do. We share and share alike.” Winter said.
I blinked.
“Okay the plastic tarp is in place. Lips are nice and glossy. Very little make-up so your natural beauty and charm shines through. We should have given you some padding. Since your flat as the Delta. But given it's nighttime and you'll be seated at least three feet from the throwing line and you're also wearing a plastic tarp. So I doubt anybody will be paying much attention to your chest, and hopefully they won't notice your lack of breast. I mean if push comes to shove. I could always shove two apples down the front of your uniform. But, they're going to aim for your face, so smile, smile like you're a movie star or a beauty queen or something.” Winter said grinning.
I wanted to ask why Winter was helping me, but before I could get a word out she dashed out of the line of fire. It was then the truth had started to settle on me. This was not a weird fever dream brought on by the onset of cold, nor was this the product of drinking the weird tea my aunt always kept in the fridge. For the second time in my life, and no I did not count the whole Dotty thing I was presenting myself as female in public, maybe this was the first time. Oh shit this was the first time, this was the first time I'd used the name “Daisy Isabella Bell” in public!
I felt my cheeks starting to bloom with color as I did my best to keep my back straight, my head held high and my eyes focused in front of me.
Jamie smirked a little and smiled as she watched Winter once more safely retreat to the safety of the sidelines, She then turned upon her heel and smiled as she peered toward the crowd that had started to form around the booth. A huddle mass of all humanity all eager to lay down their five dollar bills for a chance to a pie in the face of a pretty girl!
“Attention Benton!” Jamie called out her voice and it echoed across the crowded, bustling fairground. “The 'Pie a Cheerleader' booth is now open for business! Due however to a volunteer shortage and an unforeseen issue with getting supplies! I'm afraid we're only open for a limited time! Also we only have a limited amount of pies on hand!”
I blinked and blinked again. Well that was a bit of good news maybe? A mere thirty seconds passed before a woman a few years older than me, one with long brown hair and sparkling blue eyes appeared at the counter of the booth. She was dressed in a flora print sundress. She smiled and without saying a word she placed five one dollar bills down upon the wooden surface. The girl smirked a little as she peered toward me, she then reached over and picked up one of the pies. Balancing the pie in the palm of her hand she reared it back and a second later I was tasting custard and pie crust.
“Oh!” The brunette girl said, smiling. “That felt good!”
“Wow... Madeline, I thought since Daisy is your cousin you would it hurt you to show a little mercy and just donate the five dollars.” Jamie said, smirking a little. “Gotta say. Maybe we should have used unicorn flavored pudding instead of normal vanilla.”
I could not really comment because for a few moments I was shocked, I wanted to know who in the world had the bright idea of putting the pudding in the fridge and turning the fridge down on the lowest setting! Because the pudding was cold and the creamed topping was also cold. And I could feel the filling sinking into my hair.
“Why?” I heard Madeline ask Jamie.
“Because,” I heard another voice say, “Of the colors of the pudding.”
A few seconds later I heard or felt something cold land on top of my head. Whoever had ever tossed the pie had thrown it a little high and it had landed right on top of my head. I shivered a little as I felt the full weight of the pie being pressed down upon me. I could feel the coldness of the pudding slipping down my neck and running down the collar of my blouse.
“What are the colors?” Another voice asked.
A few seconds later I felt another pie slap into my face, and I heard the tin fall on the ground in front of me. At this point I think I had more custard than hair on me, if that is even possible!
“Blue, pink and white.” The voice said.
“If we get enough donations, say around twelve thousand dollars. We could dump a whole bucket of the stuff over her. Heck I'll even take off the covering.” Jamie said, smirking. “Might even put Cerridwen on FaceTime so she can watch. After all, laughter is supposed to be the best medicine.”
At that moment I managed to clear most of the cream from my face. The tarp I was wearing was sticky, and covered with cream and drops of pudding. It was then that I got a good look at the group of people who had gathered around the counter. I was shocked! I knew most of them.
“You know!” Jamie said, smirking a little. “If the whole gang turns out. We might have to close down early. “
“With the fair just starting? When I was in charge of the cheerleading program we would keep the pie toss running from the moment the gate opened to the moment the gate closed! Man your really slacking off little sister!” I heard a blonde girl say to Jamie.
“Maybe you would like to take Daisy's place sister, after her turn is up?” I heard Jamie say toward the blonde haired girl as she folded her hands behind her back. “I really think this tradition is outdated though! We could make a boat load of money selling cupcakes or stuff.”
“I did my time in the chair!” I heard the blonde woman saying as she peered toward Jamie. “I'm just saying. You know, never mind? Anyway, what is all this talk of a special stunt?”
“If we collect twelve hundred dollars. I guess I will dump a bucket of this 'special' unicorn flavored pudding on my brave volunteer. Without the covering. Like a mop bucket worth. Problem is, we don't have enough of that stuff and who going to donate that much!”
I was blushing deeply and trying to clean my face as best I could.
“I'll call mom. She'll get daddy to donate the pudding, you know we own a general store.” The woman said, smiling. “And I'll donate a hundred dollars! Sweet Magnolia Bakery and Tearoom will!”
“And I'll donate a spare set of clothing. And a throw in some shampoo, soap, towels and stuff!” A woman with red hair said, smiling sweetly.
“Brewer Farms will donate another hundred dollars!” A brunette woman said, smiling as she appeared on the scene.
“The Heather Ford Show will also donate another hundred dollars!” Another blonde hair woman said.
“Edward's Butcher and Seafood Market will donate another hundred!” Another voice chimed in!
“Wow.. four hundred dollars already.. still eight hundred dollars short..”
“Give us time sis.. the fair just opened.” And with that the blonde hair woman stepped away.
“What have I gotten into..” I said taking a deep breath as I felt another pie smash into my face. Ten minutes into what was to be an hour shift and I'd always felt like it would take a week of baths to wash away all the cream and pudding that had baked me. And now they were talking about upturning a bucket of pudding over my head?
“Now you see what we cheerleader's go through every year when the fair rolls around!” Winter said, smiling as she stepped toward me. I blinked. She seemed to be holding a wet rag in her hand.
“Stand still okay I'm going to clean your face a little, give them a nice clean target to toss at! Also your doing great! Just keep smiling and showing the crowd those pearly whites.” Winter said grinning as she took the warm rag and slowly she started to wash my face.
Again I had to ask myself, what in the world had I gotten myself into!
-Act III
Daisy Isabella Bell Crosses over the Rubicon
The seconds quickly melted into minutes and those minutes seemed to drag on and on. It seemed most of the town folks of Benton did not want to part with their hard earned money or make a cash donation for the honor of pushing a pie into a pretty cheerleader's face anymore. And that suited me just fine, the fair itself seemed like a real bummer too. I could also tell by the number of people passing by the booth, that Jamie, our fearless leader seemed at fist a little annoyed and now she seemed fuming mad.
“I blame the lack of rides! I mean who is going to pay ten dollars to get into a fair that has only ten rides. And most of those are just little kiddie rides! Oh sure you could say 'Well Jamie it's always the food trucks' but like how many food trucks do you see out there?! I tell you what I've counted them and I'd only need to use my left hand! Heck we don't even have the damn girl scouts out here peddling their knock off, high as hell cookies! Much less the freaking boy scouts with their overpriced tins of popcorn! It's a bloody bust!”
Winter and I exchanged looks.
“Oh my God! This was supposed to be a big money making event! I remember when my sister ran it, it used to rake in buckets of dollars! Of course back then the fair was totally different, for one it was cold, really cold! And you had some really kick-ass rides, like dozens of them. Rides that would make you wet your panties , you also had dozens of food stands, you had a plethora of sideshows! And I don't remember the tickets ever being ten dollars a piece! Never!” Jamie hooted as she stomped her foot on the hard ground that was the floor of the booth.
Winter and I once more exchanged looks.
“Nothing going the way it should! First nobody wanted to volunteer to help me and Winter staff the booth. Nobody wanted to help the squad out by taking a custard pie to the face! Finally I got Cerridwen to volunteer because she is the youngest member of the 'A' squad. But then like always when it gets cold, and the season starts to change, her body decides to hate on her and she comes down with the sniffles or something. And that takes her out of action. So then I'm forced to cash in a favor. Turns in by cashing in that favor, I've flipped a bunch of flipping mental switches in my volunteers head. Turns out they're in the 'Egg' and picked of all the time to 'Hatch' the time they're getting dressed for the pie toss. Now, halfway through the damn fair we've only managed to raise around like fifty dollars! Have you seen the price of gas per gallon?! Fifty dollars is like a tank of gas at best? That might get us halfway to Oxford?! I stress the 'might' part.” Jamie then tossed her hands up into the air and shouted something that neither I or Winter could understand.
“Ms. Potter.” I said, taking a deep breath. Winter at this point in time the best thing she could do with her time was practice her nails. Right now she was busy removing the old color with some nail polish remover.
“WHAT?!” Jamie snapped as she turned around.
“I gotta go pee.” I said blushing a little.
“Okay.. I guess.. I guess winter can take over you?” Jamie said, closing her eyes.
“Sorry that's a big no..” Winter said as she started to run her now wet nails dry with some brown paper towel. “I told you Jamie girl, the 'Pie a Benton Academy' is old and tired. I mean each year they have a 'Silent Cheerleader' stunt around Homecoming. You know, we cheerleaders gotta go the whole day without muttering a signal word, and if we mutter a word, the student who catches us gets to take our oversize name badge and gets the privilege of shoving a pie that made from cool-whip and pudding into the unlucky girls face. And that's free.”
Jamie nodded her head, I think the sad truth was starting to dawn on her.
“I also told you that we should try selling hotdogs this year. You could get away with selling them for like three dollars a piece. That two dollars cheaper than what the local Masonic Lodge is selling for. Three dollars for a hotdog, a dollar for an off brand coke, a dollar for a fresh baked cookie, like we could have been making buckets of money. I remember Sunflower was running a special, they were selling Bar S's hotdogs, at each hotdog per pack, and if my math is correct eight times three is twenty four. Each pack of hotdogs would have brought in twenty four dollars. My dad also works for IGA Breads, I know he would cute us good deal on slightly out of hot dog buns.” Winter said as she walked over to me and gently she tried to lift the covering without getting any cream or pudding on her fingers.
Jamie was blushing like mad at this point. Clearly Winter calling out her shortcoming as a leader was getting on her nerves.
“Okay kiddo, go pee, be sure to use the women's bathroom, and be sure to sit when you pee too.” Winter said sweetly, it seemed to clear as a bell to me that tonight she was the counterpoint to the demanding and maybe unhinged Jamie.
“But I normally stand to take a leak.” I said blushing deeply.
“Fuck it, were screwed. The pooch is so screwed!” Jamie hotted as she turned to face one of the wooden walls. Slowly she started to knock her head against the wooden wall. The sound of her head knocking into the wall echoed across the fairground and drew a modest amount of attention from those walking by the booth. Though not the kind attention I'm sure Jamie was looking to gain from the crowds.
“I know that sweetie.” Winter said, smiling sweetly, “But tonight you are a lady. And us ladies sit when they need to pee. And plus the bathroom here is old, having been built in the late eighties. It's also been abused and is the favorite haunt for wasps in the warmer months. Also the stalls don't have locks. So somebody could very well barge in at any moment. And if they decided that they need to pee and so they bust open your stall and find you standing to pee. Let's just say there's going to be hell to pay for all of us. Now, on the flip side if they were to barge in and find you seated, with your legs together, and everything nicely tucked in. They are more likely to mutter a very quick 'Sorry' under their breath and go into the next empty stall or wait outside.” Winter said, smiling a little.
“Winter.. you should go ahead and go with her. Please, pretty please go with her. I'll just tell everybody our sweet, lovely volunteer has stepped out to take care of personal business and she'll be right back. Plus, the first lesson she needs to learn if she is going to be a girl, is that girls travel in pairs.” Jamie muttered. “Plus this fundraiser is a lost cause anyway.”
“Oh sure. I forgot that Daisy is not potty trained yet.” Winter said smiling.
“I kind of wish I never tried to escape from the clutches of Nurse Spooky right now. The idea of being her dark acolyte and helping her plunge the hospital into total darkness. I mean she was going to make the girl I wanted to be, but in the process I had given her my soul. But I'm fine with that.” Us Bell's are known for a dark, dark, twisted sense of humor. And right now, with everybody taking jabs at me. And having been covered from head to toe in custard, cream and pie crust. I was in a pretty dark humor frame of mind.
Winter and Jamie both looked at me, Jamie looked like I'd spouted a second hand and that second hand was now talking in Latin. Winter though, smiled a little and leaned over and gently, in a soft, almost motherly tone of voice whispered into my ear.
“Oh, who says you escaped her for good. I heard from my mom who's also a nurse that the fabled 'Nurse Spooky' can on certain nights of the year leave the confines of the hospital to stalk prey that have escaped her. If she has some strands of that beautiful hair of yours, then she has your scent and she can follow you and stalk you. Watching from the shadows, waiting for the perfect chance to pounce on you and drag you into the shadows. Waiting to spirit you away into the darkness and void of the shadow world.”
I felt my blood to icy water. I turned and peered into Winter's eyes and they seemed a little more menacing than normal. I was just about to respond when Winter beat me to the punch.
“But don't worry little sis. I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you. You're my new baby sister and it's the job of the big sisters to keep the little sisters safe. Right Jamie?” Winter said, turning toward Jamie with a smile that curved from one ear to the other. It was kind of a half-moon smile.
Jamie was clearly not amused at the banter.
“Ladies! Bathroom now! Unless Miss. Daisy Isabella Bell feels like she can keep holding it for the last fifteen or twenty minutes of her shift. I don't know which? Because I've lost track of time! Also, we are sunk! This whole fundraiser has been a circus without any animals or clowns or anything!” Jamie shouted all this at the top of her lungs. Her voice echoed.
It was at this moment I knew Jamie was really unhinged tonight and the presser of running a successful fundraiser had caused her to snap. I mean she was standing in the shadow of her older, more popular big sister, Lily Elizabeth Potter, who had helmed the cheerleading program for four wonderful years. So it was safe to say she had some pretty big shoes to fill.
It took a few moments for me to completely get the cape off. And it took another moment for me to gain my footing as the ground was slick with oily cream and pudding. And another moment of holding onto Winter for support as I crossed the minefield the last thing I wanted to do was slip on some pudding and fall down flat on my and twist my knee or sprang my ankle for my troubles.
Once that was done, I was ushered backstage and guided through the fairground. Jamie was right, when compared to some of the other regional fairs I'd been too growing up in Vicksburg, this one was small peanuts. I counted four or five rides and like Jamie said most of the rides were indeed 'Kiddie' rides and maybe one or two side shows.
One of the most popular side-shows was where one paid three dollars to bend down and pick up a plastic duck. At the bottom of the duck was a number, you matched the number to a box and there you went, you got a prize. Most of the prizes it seemed came straight from the shelves of the local Super-Value Dollar Store. And maybe one food truck. All in all the picking was slim here.
“The fair used to be a lot bigger, but since the whole pandemic thing, things have really slowed down. People are still afraid to be around other people it seems and to get out and about. That and it's peak deer season.” Winter smirked. “I guess a lot of guys are out in the woods, aiming to bring home that prized buck deer or aiming to fill the freezer for the winter. And I guess a lot of gals decided on following their boyfriends and husbands into the woods to keep an eye on them. Plus, like I told Jamie before she settled on running that even, the Pie Toss is old, we need something new.”
I nodded my head.
“Anyway I guess you're on the squad now, if anybody asks you, you tell them you're on the 'C' squad. We have three squads, 'A' squad is the main line up of cheerleaders that do all the high flying cheers, pretty much these girls are the cream crop if you will. In short their seasoned veterans. Second, you have the 'B' squad of girls, these girls have a season or two under their belts, have attended some training camps, and they show some promise and in time with a bit of work and a dash of luck, they might get promoted to the 'A' squad. That is if they keep on growing and learning. And last but not least you have a 'C' squad. Normally these are promising eighth graders, Freshman and Sophomores who did make the 'B' squad when the yearly rounds of promotions were passed outs. They cheer in group cheers, they get their photos taken with the rest of the squads. They're just as important than any of the other squads. In time if they keep at it, they will be promoted hopefully from 'C' to 'B' and with a lot of hard work and a small bit of luck they will make 'A' their senior year.”
Winter took a deep breath.
So, if anybody asks you why they've not seen you at any of the games this past season, say your on the 'C' squad Okay? Cause, not to be rude or anything, nobody really pays them much attention anyway. We don't want them to ask too many questions. Benton Academy is a small school, and everybody pretty much knows everybody, either directly or indirectly. So there is a good chance that come Monday Morning somebody from our school would have seen you. And then the cat will be out of the bag. I guess we'll have to cross that bridge when we come to it.”
“It's safe to say at this point in time you have crossed over the Rubicon.” Winter said, sighing.
“Alea lacta est!” I muttered softly under my breath.
“Y'all Episcopal folks and your love for everything England and Latin.” Winter said, shaking her head from one side to the other. “I only know bits and pieces of it, because I took it my Freshman year cause the professor was young, like right out of college, and the ink was still wet on his diploma. And he was fine as summer wine and hot to trot. And then I thought I could lure him into the broom closet for a little kissing, a little cuddling and a little something extra. Get a nice and spicy story to tell the girls at camp. Worst mistake I ever made, the man was married, his wife was a bitch and I nearly flunked the course. In the end I managed to pass with a 'B' only because I forced myself to study.” Winter muttered under her breath.
At that moment I knew there was no chance of ever turning back. The wheels had been set in motion.
Act IV
Why Does Unicorn Flavored Pudding Taste like Cheap Cotton Candy?
My maiden trip into the women's restroom went down without a hitch. And I soon found myself sitting once more in a pudding and cream covered chair, wearing a plastic cloak that was covered with dried pudding and sour, smelling cream. Jamie looked crestfallen. Winter looked boarded out of her mind and tried to look cute and I fell flat on my face.
“Okay.” Jamie said after a few tense minutes. “I guess this is my fault. I'll go ahead and accept the blame for this fundraiser flopping and step down as captain. I'll turn in my pom-poms first thing tomorrow morning and I'll even turn in my prefect badge.”
“Falling on your own sword already?” I said.
Nobody said anything.
“Well it's a good thing that your big sister is here.” A voice came from the crowd. “Because I just pulled your pretty blonde head out of the cooking pot.”
I blinked, Winter blinked and then finally Jamie, our fearless leader blinked. And then from the crowd came Lily, Jamie's older sister. Following behind Lily was what appeared to be a small army of followers.
“I told all of my fellow businessmen and women who have poured, sweat, blood, and treasure into keeping our downtown area thriving. That the lovely young woman who volunteered to play the last Dotty had also volunteered to help my dim-witted, but well meaning little sister to staff the Pie Toss, even though she should be the one helping with cleaning up. Jamie, honey, the captain always goes in first. But, I guess you kind of forgot that.” Lily said in a mild, scolding manner.
Winter rolled her eyes and sighed to herself.
“Anyway! A bunch of us local business owners got together and all of us pooled together some money to help cover the cost of your food, lodging and gas. Now, if you had been smart you would have promoted yourself a little better. If you'd been really smart like your big sister would have been. You would have listened to your lieutenant here. Who from what I understand is going to take the squad next year.” Lily went on.
Winter nodded her head.
“And I've already picked out two of my lieutenants too. In fact one is sitting here right now, and one is at home sweating out a bad case of the seasonal flu.” Winter said with a small smile. “Don't worry, I'll do my best to keep the home fire burning.
I stayed silent through the whole exchange.
Jamie blushed a little and seemed to be on the verge of tears.
“Live and learn sister.” Lily said, shaking her head. “Anyway, around twelve local businesses, most of them downtown merchants, each chipped in a hundred dollars a piece. So that's twelve hundred dollars.” Lily said as she reached into her purse and slowly she pulled out a plain envelope. “So inside here I have twelve one hundred dollar bills. But, there is a catch.”
Jamie and Winter seemed all ears, I on the other hand remained silent.
“The first condition. Daisy has to agree personally to perform the final stunt. Neither Winter or You can twist her arm. Since I promoted Daisy, it can only be Daisy. Now normally it would be the captain of the squad. But since you're above taking a little for the good of the squad. And since you had to force Daisy into doing this. The choice is hers and hers alone.”
I blinked and blinked.
“The second condition. The whole squad must attend the training camp. Now, I know in years past that only the 'A' and 'B' sections would be allowed to attend the summer training camp. But this year it must be the whole squad. All three sections. In fact, I personally promised a roaster of all the girls who would attend the training camp would be given to each merchant who donated. All also demanded that a certain Daisy Isabella Bell be present. I promised them it would be. And it seems that Benton Chemical Works and Guild's Building Company. Have really taken a shine to her. Because they promised to make a nice little donation to my squad if I personally promised to train her..” Lily paused.
“So Daisy, I hope you are ready to work. Cause starting tomorrow morning. Fourteen college age girls are going to put you through the paces. Pretty much, what it takes most girls thirteen years to learn, I'm going to drill into from now till next season. So yes.” Lily paused and took a deep breath. “I also promised that all the cheerleaders would take photos of their activities at the training camp. To prove the whole squad was invited to attend. I also promised that each girl would write a thank you letter, to each of the small business owners that made the cash donation. Meaning that Daisy Isabella Bell, also must write a letter and be included in all camp activities. And she must get her fair share of photos posted on squads Facebook.” Lily was smirking at this point.
Jamie seemed as white as a sheet and Winter's eyes were as wide as saucer plates.
“That mean's Daisy Isabella Bell is now on the squad. So you better have a plan, little sister. Kind of reminds me how you broke the egg. Okay onto the third and final condition.” Lily said with a smile as she waved the envelope in front of Jamie's face. I could tell she was enjoying this.
“If none of the first two conditions are met to the satisfaction of all the merchants that donated. Then the full amount must be refused.” Lily sighed. “I did my best to get them to sway from the last one, but nobody would budge. I can't help it, nobody till tonight has heard of Daisy Isabella Bell, well that not till I mentioned the whole Dotty stunt. Which is weird, and I'm glad I've not been asked to volunteer for that thing. Kissing a big was foulest thing I've ever done for charity. But the moment I brought it up that little cartoon light bub that always floats above peoples head flickered on.”
“I'll agree on one condition.” I said blushing. “Jamie has to call Cerridwen and put her on FaceTime. I'm sure she would love to see this.”
Lily blinked and then Jamie blinked, and finally Winter smirked and rolled her eyes. A moment later was reaching into her purse and a few seconds later she was pulling out her phone. Smiling from one corner of her mouth to the other. And without missing a beat she started to dial Cerridwen number. A few moments later I heard her speaking into the tiny black box that was her phone.
“Hey is this Cerridwen” She asked, a few moments later she nodded her head. “Hey, how are you feeling girl? Oh darn, but at least your at home in bed right? Like your at home in bed right? Like is your fever going down at all, oh right..” A moment passed. “Oh great! That's good to hear! I hope you start getting your strength back soon. Anyway, your girlfriend is here about to get a bucket of pudding poured over head. At first I was going to send you a video, but then she suggested that I put you on FaceTime so you could see in real time.”
I felt myself starting to blush all over again.
“Okay! Hey girl, don't worry about your face, nobody cares, you're sick, here putting you on right now.” With that Winter smashed a few buttons on her phone. She then held the little black box up to my face, a moment later Cerridwen's face appeared in front of me.
“Hey!” She said weakly, her normally porcelain colored skin seemed to be flushing red with fever. Her normally bright blue eyes, eyes that never failed to remind me of my birth stone, the Sapphire seemed dull and fringed with darkness and her breathing was hard, like she was struggling and fighting for each breath she took. My heart lurched into my throat.
“Sorry you had to fill in for me, my Daisy.” She whispered in a horsed tone of voice. She sounded rough too, “I'm sick, really sick, mom is debating taking me to the hospital. I don't want to go, I don't want to see her again.” She said, sighing. She then fell into a brief coughing fit, after a few hard coughs she managed to spit up a big wad of something. She sighed again and then turned toward. “Also right now, I'm so pilled up, I don't think I could even get out of bed. The Doctor this morning gave me these huge antibiotic pills and two shot. I mean the pills are like horse pills.”
“No problem, anything for you my love.” I said blushing a little. Winter started to snicker a little as I said that, but she kept holding up the phone so I could see Cerridwen. Jamie just stood there looking lost as a goose and Lily was looking down, inspecting her nails.
“Well I owe you one.” Cerridwen paused. A few flash seconds later she fell into another horrible sounding coughing fit. The terrible coughing seemed to go on and on forever and a day until finally she made a horrible sounding noise and a deep rumble came from her throat. A few seconds later she coughed up what I'm going to assume was the world's largest oyster. One that would put a Mountain Oyster to shame and disgrace. “Say, can I take you out?”
“Me or James? I asked, silly I know but I had to know, something deep inside of me wanted to know.
“You.” Cerridwen paused. “The true you, the girl named Daisy Isabella Bell. You, my love, my moon and son.” She said as she looked dead at me.
“Me or James?” I asked, silly question but I had to know.
“You.” Cerridwen paused. “You Daisy Isabella Bell.. you my love, my moon and sun.” She said as she looked dead at me.
“Okay!” Lily said, smiling. “Now that we got that out of our system. I would like to get this show on the road. Winter if you could take this bucket.” She said nodding her head a few moments later a red-haired girl named Robin appeared beside her, Robin was holding a black mop bucket. “It has five gallons of unicorn pudding. And go stand behind Daisy, I would really love it.”
I blinked and blinked again as I watched Winter take the bucket from Robin and slowly my eyes followed her as Winter picked the mountains of cream and pudding and soon I could feel her standing behind me, I could feel the bucket being lifted into place.
“And Cerridwen.” Lily said smiling. “Can you give us a count down starting from five?”
Cerridwen nodded her head.
I felt my cheeks start to flush with color.
“Five! Four! Three! Two! One!” Cerridwen started to chant.
And then it happen, it happened in a matter of seconds, I felt the bucket being lifted up and being hovered above my head. A moment later I felt Winter starting to tip the bucket over my head. A few beats of the heart later, I felt a landslide of something heavy come rolling over my head. Another skip or beat of the heart later I felt something oily fall over my head, covering my pigtails.
I shivered and jumped a little. The mixture was cold, icy cold and smelled, it smelled like, well have you ever opened up a bag of sugar and stuck your nose down into it. If you have, you know very well the smell I was smelling at that point in time.
Then a feeling of stickiness came washing over me.
“Wow..” Jamie said as she looked at me. “It looks like a unicorn just barfed up it's lunch and Daisy was standing in front of it when the thing did it.”
“Do unicorns normally barf up sparkling layers of pink, blue, and white?” Another girl said.
“Hell if I know.. Then again this stuff came from Wal-Mart.” Another girl said. “But Jesus girl! The smell. It smells so sweet that I think I'm going to get tooth rot just by smelling it. And the way it's clinging to her. Jesus, she might need to get that stuff cut out of her hair.”
“Well it's pudding.. I guess it will come out in the wash..” Another girl said.
I blushed and looked down at the ground. The ground was covered in puddles of this strange, blue, white, and pink pudding. Then I caught sight of my reflection in one of the mirrors.
The mirror showed that I'd been covered from the very top of my head down to the bottom of my white sneakers with pudding that was layered with the colors, blue, white, and pink. My pigtails were coated in it, the top of my cheerleading uniform was smeared with it, my skirt soaked in it. My face though had gotten untouched. My hair, I knew I was in for a long night of washing it, that my uncle would once more be muttering about how much hot water I'll be using.
And that tomorrow, if I attended Mass. I was sure I would still have bits of pudding in my hair. But in the end, I'd raised close to twelve hundred dollars, been made a member of the Benton Academy Cheerleaders, and I'd finally cracked my egg. I had crossed the river Rubicon and now, I just needed to take a hold of Rome. I'd even gotten a date out of the whole thing. So it was all good.
The End.