Tara sat book in hand, though for the moment forgotten, watching out the kitchen window, her two children playing in the yard. It was a bright sunny day in late July and the twins were enjoying the heat of the Michigan sun. Tara's two children were alike in many ways often being mistaken as identical twins. While certainly an easy mistake to make, Tara herself often had difficulty believing how similar they were, almost everyone who knew them for any length of time knew that that just simply couldn’t be the case. Jack as alike to Macy as could be in fact male, definitely not a boyish boy but one none the less and Macy his twin was a girl but for all that they were often indistinguishable, as alike as any two people ever could be.
As thick as thieves and often remarked by others as inseparable the twins did everything together, liked and did the same things. There constant companionship made it even more difficult to tell them apart even for their parents which seemed to cause the twins endless amusement. From the moment they were able to dress themselves the hijinks had started, even to this day they remained still very close to identical both had long flowing gold locks that came down to the small of their backs and was immaculately groomed. For almost as long as they had been causing confusion both had decided they wanted long hair, Tara had spent countless hours teaching them how to care for their hair and getting them both into hair care routines. Consequently, neither twins’ hair was ever greasy or unkept but shone in the sun light and fluffy. For sports which both seemed to enjoy, excelling at most sports because of their athletic build, were equally prone to either put their hair up in a high ponytail or braid it into one long braid with could they be tucked inside a Shirt or rolled up under a cap.
Jack only currently distinguishable from Macy by his light blue t-shirt, Macy was wearing a similar one in light purple, was trying to persuade Macy to play some game or other with him, Tara from this vantage point couldn’t be sure what, Macy seemed disinterested in the idea. Tara chuckled to herself, disagreements between them seldom seemed to occur between them and were usually quickly settled she had no doubt this one would be as well. In a way, while it was probably the wrong reaction for a parent to have Tara was sometimes glad to see minor disagreements like this, with the united front the twins often displayed it was comforting to know they still disagreed like any other siblings. Tara settled back down to reading her book again, unlike her children, she preferred the cool of the indoors to the heat of the outdoors.
*********************
Only three days later, to all three equally sunny, Tara had arranged to go shopping with her friend Bethany. Bethany and Tara had known each other for many years, having met at university quickly becoming best friends consequently, they had thought it no small wonder when, after having children at around the same time, at the age of four their two daughters had become best friends. The two women found themselves shrugging it off and even becoming better friends because of it, they had drifted apart somewhat over the intervening years. Sharing a mutual love of shopping they often found that their get togethers revolved around that love. They often spent countless hours shopping, mostly windows shopping and it gave them lots of time to converse. Since they both had daughters that were about the same age and size, when shopping, they had developed a system whereby if one of them saw something that would look good for either of their children they would direct the others attention towards it.
This time June had directed Tara over to a red sweater positively enthusing that it would look so pretty on Macy and that Tara simply had to get it for her, looking at it Tara had to agree. She considered the cut and the fabric for a moment, light but not insubstantial, the top was not obviously feminine, Tara grabbed two off the rail.
"It's unisex, enough." She said by way of a simple explanation.
June let out a slightly bewildered laugh.
"Do they still dress identical?”
For large swaths of their childhood Jack and Macy had found immense pleasure in trying to trick all the of adults around them, by dressing either identically or as each other.
"Yes, but not as often." Tara replied with a slight giggle.
"Is Phillip…" June began to ask, Phillip was Tara's husband and Jack, Macy's father, but was cut of midsentence by Tara.
“Still blissfully unaware that any such thing carried on after the age of four yes, not that he seems to be home long enough for that to be an issue recently."
June gave her friend a sympathetic hug. She, Tara and to a lesser extent several of their friends had taken great pains in the past to hide the twins dress up from Phillip. Phillip was a manly kind of man who would be unlikely to react well to that kind of thing especially when it came to his son.
"Is he still working out out of at the state then?" June asked not wanting to further upset her friend but undeniably curious.
“Yeah, he was working in Texas inspecting some building project or other, he was supposed to be back by now, in fact, two days ago, but he rang me several days back telling me he had just been offered this massive oversight role in by a major construction company in Canada. Before I could even begin to respond he told me that he had already accepted it. I don't even know when he will be back." Tara responded bitterly.
June expressed her indignation and anger at Tara's husband on her friend’s behalf as well as her righteous frustration at his thoughtless actions while also desperately trying to calm her friend down. Eventually, they moved on to another clothes shop once emotions at had settled down somewhat.
"I don't know how the to twins do it." June almost screeched in dismay as Tara showed her a recent picture of the two of them dressed in identical matching outfits only a week or two before. If their own mother had not told her which was which, June was fairly sure she would not have been able to tell one apart from the other, they even smiled identically.
Tara just giggled with a wry smile twinging her lips, she was used to her children’s antics by now even though it was sometimes difficult even for her to remember that one was her son and the other her daughter, especially when looking a picture like that one where Jack looked for all the world like he was her daughter.
"I think that they may be making the most of it while they can, if Macy grows anymore up top it will soon become impossible not to be able to tell the difference." June giggled readily agreeing with her friend.
"Look at that." June, only just recovered from her giggling fit, was already directing Tara towards the rack of sports tops that had caught her interest. Only slightly cropped the tops were a lightweight wicking material that could either be worn as an outer or under layer. Feeling the material Tara couldn't help but agree with June that they would be perfect for the girls. Both Bethany and Macy intended to do cheerleading next academic year and such tops would be prefect for when they exercised. Both women in agreement they each got their respective daughters multiple such tops. The tops came in four colours blue, light green, red, and pink, so Tara resolved to get two of each colour knowing her daughter she suspected that Macy would love the colour variations.
***************
"Come on Jack, it will be fun, and you have got to admit that, that top is really cute." Macy begged her twin. They were getting ready for a neighbourhood BBQ party; a yearly event had been a staple of the neighbourhood for much of their lives and had a fun party atmosphere. The event that occurred at least once but depending on the year sometimes occurred more than once was always well attended drawing families together to enjoy the festive summer spirit. The tradition had started when Jack and Macy were little children with their parents inviting a few friends and neighbours to their not insubstantial property for a BBQ during the summer. It had only grown from there both in terms of get scope and guest list, almost everyone who lived close by were coming. As the children of the host most of the guests knew Jack and Macy, they were far from the only children in the area though, and since many of the parents at the twin’s school were friends with Tara, most of Jack and Macy's friends would be going, something that was made even more likely as it was the first such BBQ of the year.
It was this extensive guest list that was giving Jack pause, while he was happy to be mistaken for his sister by most people, this would be a lot more people all at once than usual. Not to mention, that Jack, while never appearing even to his friends as much of a boy, had always taken pains to never appear girly in front of them and if he did this, he would most definitely be breaking that rule. There was no mixing that top up as a boy’s top, Macy was right though, Jack reflected the top really was pretty and he told Macy this.
“I know right," She beamed. " Mom got me this one a few weeks ago, I don't think she realised I already had one just like it, anyway it's perfect for this."
"Macy," Jack tried again, almost whining now. "I can't wear it, you defiantly should, you will look great in it, I can’t though, it’s clearly a girl’s shirt." This at least was true, the shirt in question was more of a blouse with little sequence on the arms. I know, that's why it's perfect for this, we both wear boy’s jeans and this top with our hair lose. It will confuse everyone; no-one will know which is which. It will be so fun Jack looked at the top again, indecision evident in his eyes, he really wanted to do this and the shirt was so cute but he couldn’t get over the issue of all his friends seeing him like that. Jack knew they would not understand, and their potential reactions worried him greatly.
"Please Jack, for me. " His sister begged and reluctantly Jack found himself agreeing wondering what he had just agreed to.
“Great, this is perfect, we are going to look totes adorbs!” Macy screeched, grinning wildly she was practically jumping up and down with excitement at Jacks acquiescence.
The party was already in full swing as Jack and Macy made their way down in their identical outfits. Bethany's Dad was substituting for Phillip who not even a full day before the event had finally called to tell his wife that he couldn't possibly get back for something as unimportant as this after only just taking over this latest project. Bethany's Dad therefore was leading the four Man, four grills BBQing effort.
Jack and Macy walked round conversing with several adults, neighbours they occasionally spoke to and other such individuals, all of whom tried to size the two up wondering which of but the two was which. After the fourth such Interaction Macy pulled Jack aside.
“Lighten up, stop beings so self-conscious, you look pretty or handsome or whatever. Just act normally, the top looks good on you own it.” She told him firmly, walking around, taking to people they knew Macy had begun to notice his stiffness and slightly pained expression.
Nodding Jack tried to do exactly that, loosening his shoulders and trying to relax a little.
As Jack was relax his shoulders and posture trying to destress, Bethany came racing up. She had the same athletic build as Macy but was slightly taller with than either Jack or Macy, who were about the same hight, she also had rounder checks and short brown hair.
“Hi Macy, Jack." Her eyes swing between them unsure who to rest on, after a few initial seconds of indecision she settled on a rather comical head swivel double take.
“Hi Bethany." They answered in unison, causing a stifled chuckle.
"Don’t do that, you know it freaks me out, it’s like some horror movie scene. Come on, I have Ellie, Victoria and Leah with me come and sit with us.” Bethany didn't wait for an answer before turning round and walking off, Macy and Jack quickly followed her.
Ellie was a short, quiet girl with a dark blonde hair, she never said much but very much held the friendship group together. Victoria was much less meek, an opinionated red head a lot taller than any of the other girls, she was never afraid to voice her opinion on something, a trait that more often than not got both herself and her friends in trouble. Leah was a blacks haired girl who was also talker than Macy, best friends with Victoria she spent most of her time trying to mediate between the opinionated red head and the rest of the group. All three were good friends of Macy and all three were hoping to do cheerleading next year alongside Macy.
After studying the pair for a few minutes, they begged Jack and Macy to tell them which one of them was which. "Can you not guess." Jack asked with a wink suddenly having fun with this.
"Yeah, your Macy, right." Grace stated with total conviction.
“Ha, no moron it’s the other way around," Leah looked to Bethany who had known Macy longest.
Bethany shrugged non-committal, lacking conviction on either answer.
“Leah's right, " Macy seeing their impasse, put them out of their misery. "Could you serious not tell?"
"You look pretty much identical." Leah admitted, Bethany nodded vigorously.
"It's pretty hard to tell you apart Macy, even when you’re not both trying to make it difficult.” Victoria opined in Macy’s direction before wincing as she realised what she had just said.
“Sorry Jack." Victoria immediately apologised realising that Jack as a boy might find it insulting and emasculating to be continuously mistaken for a girl even when he was not attempting to look like one. Looking over at the twin she now knew to be Jack, her brain rebelling slightly at that knowledge as right now he looked every bit a girl from his body language to his top, and not just any girl but one of if not the prettiest girls Victoria had seen. Was that a slight lip gloss he was wearing Victoria wondered silently.
Jack blushed in the cutest way Victoria had ever seen, as he mumbled something about it being ok.
They all sat down together, and it took seconds before the girls where excitedly chatting together with lots of gesticulating. While the girls were very welcoming to Jack pulling him into their conversation, he could not help but feel like a fraud siting there in a girly top looking to all the world like one of these girls. He was a guy, wasn't he, he shouldn't like this, should he?
Jack got up and made as its to leave the group, they were Macy's friends really, he knew they were only really tolerating his presence for Macy's sake so he figured he would leave them to talk. He had only gotten a handful of paces before Victoria with her much longer legs was in front of him, towering over him and baring his way.
“Just where do you think you’re going, like that?” Victoria asked him a fierce protective note in her voice, she led Jack back to sit with the girls again, this time making sure she positioned herself next to him.
Victoria had never noticed Macy's twin brother before, he had a tendency to blend into the background as did Macy, both were quieter than a lot of other people and therefore were easily overlooked. Now sitting beside them, Victoria had to admit he was sort of hot especially looking all cute in that little outfit. When Jack had moved and just left on his own, fear seized Victoria and her protective instinct had kicked in.
“For today you can't just go off alone." She warned him.
Jack made as if to argue but before he could even form the words to do so he was cut off by Bethany.
"Look Victoria is being a little harsh but she is right, dressed like you are and with your long hair, it looks gorgeous by the way, you look to anyone who doesn’t know you like a girl. That means for the moment, for your safety, you need to take the same precautions the rest of us do."
"Jack, even at family events like this, especially is there are a lot of people none of us go anywhere alone. It invites danger. For today you can't either. Most people know you and probably it would not be an issue around them but others don't know you and there are always a few people at something like this that no-one knows that well. It’s just best not to take any unnecessary chances." Leah broke in as they all looked at Jack earnestly.
Jack felt bewildered and a little set shocked, he usually didn't think about such things. Jack didn't know is he should feel a loss of masculinity being told not to go anywhere alone like this, was he a failure be because of it, should he just reject their advice as being too cautious. It was a little late to go back to the house and change but it did enter Jack's mind, still reeling he turned to Macy for support but found none in her glance as he met her eyes.
“I didn't really think about it before this, but I think the girls are right, if we are so easily mistaken for each other even by people who know us. It could be dangerous for you to go off on your own. Please Jack stay here with me, it’s only for today." Macy begged. Knowing he was beaten by popular opinion Jack reluctantly acquiesced. He still did not see the necessity for him staying with the girls, but he would go along with it for now especially for his twin’s sake.
The afternoon wore on like this and Jack found himself seated in between Macy and Victoria included in all their discussions as its he was one of them, it was not even a little bit awkward. Conversation flowed easily between them all and Jack was surprised to realise he was enjoying this far more than he would have if he had left to find some of the other boys. Jack often found he had very little in common with them and worse often didn't understand their more boisterous behaviours. He almost never felt included like he did now nor the ease of communication.
“Boy alert." Bethany quietly whisper shouted to them.
Sure, enough one of the more confident boys, Jack recognised him as Daniel, was strolling towards their group. Jack suspected he had been elected by the boys as their spokesman. A suspicion that was confirmed as soon as Daniel reached them. With an amiable smile, that seemed to Jack to be at least a little insincere but maybe that was just nerves, he began.
"Would you girls care to join us by the fire.”
This too was tradition, as early evening began some of the older boys would make a small campfire a little ways off from adult supervision and once an adult, usually Jack or Bethany's father, had ensured that it was not especially dangerous, most of the teenagers would congregate around it.
“We would love to especially when invited in such a charming way by such a curious man as yourself." Bethany purred accepted on behalf of the group, Daniel suddenly becoming very red and taking a great interest in both his shoes and the ground next to them. Before Jack could even think or question anything he was being herded along with the rest of the group to join the boys by the fire.
Upon joining then it became immediately apparent that none of the boys recognised Jack and further that all of them thought he was a girl. There was even a hushed debate or at least a debate that was supposed to be hushed between the boys as to who the hot new girl was. Jack was considering tell telling them all the truth, he didn't want to mislead them it felt wrong to do so, when he received a look from Victoria and then from Bethany, that warned him not to. Sighing Jack resolved to keep the truth to himself at least for now. The two groups interspersed and soon several of the girls were sat next to or on the laps of various boys, Jack was surprised to see his own sister siting snuggly rather close to Sebastian and Jack resolved to ask Macy about it later. All thoughts like this were quickly driven from Jack's mind When he found himself siting rather close to Theo. Jack had known Theo for several years and he was shocked Theo hadn't figured out who he was by now, more than ever Jack wanted to tell them all the truth but he didn’t dare to.
As time went on and stories and laughs where shared, Jack began to feel cold finally he let out a small shiver almost unnoticeable but definitely a shiver. Theo must have felt or seen it because just moments later Jack found himself pressed tighter to Theo an arm wrapped about him. Jack's felt butterflies in his stomach and marvelled at the secure feeling of being wrapped up like this before realising that he probably shouldn’t feel this way. A sense of fear at his own feelings gripped Jack and the embrace that had felt so comforting and secure just moments before now felt confining and suffocating. Jack began to hyperventilate in Theo’s arms. Theo must have noticed that too because the tight embrace loosened considerably immediately.
"It's ok Jack, I know your you although you even had me fooled you for a bit. The others don't know though, and I promise I am not going to tell them." Theo's voice was low and barely audible even to Jack so that only Jack would hear his words.
Jack slowly began to relax once his breathing had reached a steady and pace without reservation, he relaxed back into Theo’s body content in the knowledge that Theo knew and did not mind. Jack still was not ready to face his conflicted emotions though, he just pushed those thoughts off for the moment so as to be able to enjoy his evening with Theo.
Across from both Theo and Jack, Victoria, who was one of the only girls to not partnered up with one of the boys, sat watching them jealousy. Her jealousy surprised even herself, Victoria was not usually the sort of person to be this kind of jealous and she had never taken much interest in Jack before but curled against Theo's much broader frame as if he belonged there Victoria could not help but feel incredibly envious of Theo.
Macy stood hovering over her clothes-covered bed presiding over organised chaos like a monarch over her unruly subjects, she was putting forth as much consideration as she could to her potential outfit choices. It was the day after the BBQ and she was considering a blue glittery top her mother had bought her a couple of weeks ago. Even then she had been unable to figure out what it went with now looking at it again she was still at a complete loss. Sighing she set it down on the bed again and pulled out yet more skirts and pants in a vein hope it might work with one of them.
"Hi sis, what are you doing?" Jack asked in a light and breezy lilting tone from the doorway.
"Just trying to find something that goes with this top, mom bought it for me, but I just can't find anything that it fits with." Mary exasperated.
"A date then, maybe with Sebastian, you were awful close to him yesterday." Jack teased joining his sister by the bed.
"I could say the same of you, date with Theo on the cards, you two were pretty snug as well. " Mary challenged in the same teasing manner. Jack was now actively sorting through the pills of clothes on Macy's bed.
"Nah, he knew who I was, I think he was just being friendly you know, looking out for me. I don't think he meant anything by it." Jack told her in an upbeat tone that betrayed the obvious regret he felt, even if he was unwilling to acknowledge it. Macy nodded in acceptance but could not help but feel that Jack might be wrong from where she had been sitting last night the look in Theo's eyes and the way he acted suggested something else entirely.
"What about that skirt or this pair of parts," Jack asked holding up a black knee-length skirt with blue strips down either side and a black chino-style pair of pants with silver that glistened a silvery metallic in the light. Macy gave a squee of delight and hugged her brother tightly.
**************************
At about the same time that the twins were having their heart-to-heart, Victoria was more confused than ever. Her conflicted feelings of the night before had only gotten worse with time not better. She had woken up to the thought that she might be gay after all the only time she had really taken interest in Jack was when he was dressed undeniably as a girl. She ran through girls she knew in her mind, several of them were pretty but she couldn't decide if she was attracted to them or not. Stumped Victoria began running through and listing guys she knew and deciding if she found any of them attractive, again Victoria found herself stumped, she knew several who were handsome but couldn't decide if she was attracted to any of them.
That confusion continued throughout the early part of her day and into the afternoon, it colored her mood and she seemed deep in thought or far away lost in her own head. At last, her mother, having noticed this behavior, resolved to talk to her daughter, asking if she were all alight and if anything was troubling her. Victoria, who had always had a good open relationship with her mom, considered for a few seconds before bravely diving straight into the crocks of the issue.
"I think I might be gay momma Victoria stood waiting for her mom's response.
"OK dear, is there a particular girl you like?" Victoria's mother, a no-nonsense blonde woman in her early 40's questioned.
"You don't mind, momma. " Victoria's voice wavered, not being sure of much at the moment and having dreaded a reply that she had known would not have come but was to be dreaded regardless.
"No of course not, dear, I just want you to be happy, that's all. Now back to more important things, is there any particular girl you're interested in?" Victoria's mother asked again.
Victoria thought about it for a second or two, she wasn't sure how to express this, she certainly was interested in Jack but he wasn't a girl, at least she didn't think so and right now he was the only one Victoria was interested in, you couldn't be a lesbian if you like a boy, could you? So was she bi-sexual then, Victoria wasn't sure.
"I don't think so, momma." Victoria eventually decided on it.
*************************
Later the same afternoon Macy burst into Jack's room running in without announcing herself so overcome with great excitement. Jack was sitting on his bed, feet curled up underneath him playing a video game and though he was initially startled by his sister's sudden entrance he insisted much to her great annoyance on reaching a point that he could pause the game before he would listen to her.
"Victoria has invited us to go to the mall with her tomorrow," Macy announced as soon as her twin would allow her to speak.
"OK, Sis have fun," Jack told her trying to hide his disappointment at not going with them.
"No silly, we are invited, as in you and me, unless you don't want to go."
Jack put down the controller and demurely leaned back, yawning slightly. "Of course, I want to go sis."
Macy looked relieved, it was rare that any of her friendship group invited her out without the others as Victoria had and she hadn't wanted to have to tell Victoria that Jack had refused the offer. Nor did Macy particularly want to go out just her and Victoria the other girl's confidence and outgoing personality had always slightly intimidated the much less outgoing Macy.
"So, what are you going to wear?"
"Probably just jeans and a T-shirt." Jack shrugged nonchalantly. He wanted to appear manly in front of Victoria or at least he assumed he should want to appear masculine in front of Victoria. She was after all very pretty and asking him out if not one-on-one then close to it.
"Ok," Macy considered how to frame her next few words, she didn't want to upset Jack in any way, she knew that he often struggled with what he thought society and others expected of him.
"I thought it would probably be easier if you went as a girl, fewer questions at stores and things when you want to try things on." It was Macy reflected as extremely harmful to society and massively wrong but a girl who wanted to try on a boy's clothes would garner a lot less attention, being more accepted by society than a boy who wanted to try on a girl's clothes.
Jack considered for a second then shook his head.
"Nah, but you should totally wear those navy blue leggings with that cutie pink top, you know one at the back of your middle draw."
Macy recalled the top immediately; Jack was totally right it was really cutie.
"Thanks, I think I will." She responded excitedly.
Jack smiled at his twin's excitement picking up his custom pink and blue Xbox controller, to resume his game.
Victoria got her mother to drop her off at the twin's house so she could ride with the twins whose mother was taking them to the mall. Tara was only too happy to drive all three to the mall and drop them off especially as Victoria's mother had arranged to pick them all up again later that afternoon. One of the first things Victoria noticed upon entering the twin's home was how pretty Jack looked he was dressed as he had told Macy he would be in blue jeans and a red t-shirt, yet he still, Victoria looked more pretty than handsome. While the outsit was entirely men's clothing, with his long hair and effeminate look the effect seemed to have lost most of the masculinity Jack had been anxious to convey.
Eventually, Victoria was able to pull her eyes and attention away from Jack and to greet Macy. Victoria felt that she had overlooked Macy in their friendship group and was hoping to further cultivate that friendship. Victoria was also anxious that her interest in Jack was not known by any of the adults yet, it would be easier that way, she had decided if it just appeared that she thought that Jack and Mary were a package deal and not that Jack very much held her interest quite apart from his sister. Therefore, while she was conversing and cordial with Jack, for the whole time Tara was around Victoria made sure to spend a long more time conversing with Macy than Jack.
As soon as Tara was safely out of sight and the three teens were headed towards several of the large clothes shops, Victoria's attitude immediately changed and more of her attention and the conversation was switched to Jack. Who, without his mother present was much more energetic and conversational. Conversation flowed enthusiastically between all three and Jack, despite forgetting his intention of trying to seem more masculine for Victoria, is a casual observer was listening to their conversation they would have thought that all three were girls, best friends at that, talking excitedly together in the most girlish way possible.
The first store the trio stopped in at soon had the two girls changing running to the changing rooms laden with armfuls of hopeful choices while Jack offered helpful advice to both in turn as to what went with what and what suited them best. Other times Jack would wander around the racks with a wistful look in his eye and a disappointed look on his face. It was at one of these times that a sales assistant saw him looking longingly at one of the pink belly tops. This particular sales assistant had actually noticed Jack some time earlier but now she saw an opportunity and gingerly approached him.
"Hi Jacoline, I don't mean to intrude but that top would look lovely on you, why don't you try it, dearie," Jack startled from his own thoughts, looked at her slightly dazed.
"Jacoline? " He questioned.
The woman blushed, hurriedly explaining in embracement, "I had heard the other two girls calling you Jack or Jackie so I thought that must be your name. If it isn't I apologise."
"No that's fine your right. " Jack told her hurriedly backpedaling, liking the feminine name but still not really sure if it suited him. Agreeing with the store assistant seemed like the better thing for him to do anyway, it seemed a lot easier to him at that moment than trying to explain everything to her.
"In that case why don't you go and try on that top, even tomboys can get girly tops occasionally." She encouraged with a wink.
With that Jack's reluctance was forgotten and he rushed with the top to the changing room to try it on and get Victoria and his sister's opinions. In no time at all some girly jeans with pink bows on the side to match the top joined the aforementioned top in first a basket and later a shopping bag.
The store assistant who had encouraged Jack saw the trio leaving and called out.
"Have a good day Jacoline."
Jack thanked her politely with a large grin as they exited the shop. Mary and Victoria stared at him in confusion. Their confusion and continued pestering necessitated a retelling of the store assistants kindly at words. The retelling carrying them almost to the doors of the next clothes shop they wanted to look around.
"Well you need a better name than that, you're too pretty to suit that name," Victoria teased in a semi-serious way as they entered. "Don't worry, honey, we will help you think of something."
This store went much the same way as the last but Jack was much less afraid of trying clothes on, figuring that since he was so easily mistaken for a girl once then it was highly likely that anyone who did see him would think the same and give the matter no other thought. The conversation that flowed between them admittedly with short interludes as one or another of them dashed off to try something and ask the opinions of the other two, was that of cheerleading next year. Both Macy and Victoria were planning on being in the squad and could not hide their excitement to begin learning the various routines and cheers. Despite himself, their conversation soon pulled Jack in, and he did his best to chime in when he could. While cheerleading and gymnastics had never interested Jack as much as they had Macy he had watched many videos and tutorials with Macy over the years and to say he wasn't as interested was not to say he wasn't interested at all. In reality, much of Jack's disinterest originated from the fact that as a boy it was not something he would be able to participate in. He had been active in many gymnastics groups and clubs alongside Macy for a lot of their childhood but had stopped about three years ago seeing no future for himself in it.
"Why don't you start practicing some of the cheer moves in the holiday, that way you know them for when you actually go, I could help you if you want." Jack proposed, having no idea what he was getting himself into.
The girls both thought it was a great idea and Victoria even thought that some of the other girls might want to join them. Both were equally equivocal that they wanted Jack to help them and Jack for his part was more than happy to do just that.
After that store, there was disagreement as to which stores to go to next. There were two more clothing stores, a bookstore, and a video game store they wanted to stop at the other two clothing stores were on the way to the food court with one only a few feet away from the burger place that all three had decided on for lunch. Victoria wanted to go to all four clothes stores before getting food while Macy wanted to go get food now and go to the other four stores afterwards. The disagreement did not take long to be resolved in a compromise; they would go to one more of the clothes stores before lunch and then one afterward.
Straight off the bat when they entered the third store Victoria was notably more playful and teasing than ever. This string of playful comments mostly aimed at making Jack blush and get flustered which Victoria secretly found to be the cutest thing ever, culminated when she saw a revealing two-piece in a light blue color. Taking the bikini from the shelf Victoria practically skipped to the changing room calling out for Jackie to follow her before she entered the changing room.
Jack waited outside the changing room he had not seen what Victoria had picked up so he had no idea what he was about to have to give an opinion on. Victoria opened the door to show him, and Jack's jaw dropped. Seeing Jack's reaction Victoria could not help herself striking a pose with one hand on her hip and the other holding the back of her head deliberately arching her back as much as possible.
"Do you like it? My ass doesn't look too big in it does it?" Victoria asked innocently.
It was at this point that Macy came to investigate what the other two were doing. Taking one look at the display Victoria was putting on she could not help but shake her head in disbelief. Macy was finding it difficult to deal with the atmosphere between her brother and Victoria one minute it was that of two best friends and the rest it was that of two lovers, try as she might Macy could not seem to predict which one each scenario would elicit from them. The whiplash in the changing dynamics and energy was becoming more and more difficult for Macy to comprehend much less react to.
Sighing Macy gently shut her brother's jaw and led him back towards the rest of the store.
"Go and put some clothes on Victoria."
"You're no fun Macy, I still haven't found out what Jackie thought yet, however, will I know if I should buy it or not now," Victoria replied with a chuckle.
"As Jack's sister and your friend, I don't want to know what Jack thought," Macy told her firmly, a note of hard finality in her voice.
At the food court, it was quickly decided that they would all go for a burger and fries. It seemed the easiest option to all three and the agreement came quickly and unanimously, Jack and his sister scurried off to secure them a table leaving Victoria to order.
"Couldn't you have gotten a few more fries and maybe a Coca-Cola or something," Jack whined for the second time in nearly as many minutes gesturing to what he clearly considered to be a diminutive pile of fries and the bottle of spring water he had gotten.
Victoria sighed deeply, not having realised when she had made the choice that it would be so controversial.
"Jackie if you want to look like a girl you are going to have to start eating like one. Most girls are constantly watching their weight and I personally would never eat more than this for lunch while shopping. We really should have had salad with the burgers, but I figured we all could use the extra calories with how much serious shopping we are doing."
"Regardless, one day of marginally healthier eating will not harm you," Macy told Jack simply not wanting to put pressure on Jack over the male or female debate, but she was unwilling to listen to any more whining.
Jack wasn't so sure that he agreed over either of their arguments but wisely decided not to complain anymore and instead just enjoy the food and the jovial conversations that seemed to so easily flow between himself, Victoria, and Macy
The final clothes store they wanted to go to was visible from the table that Jack and Macy had chosen, so it wasn't long after they had all finished that they made their way over to it. The store was considerably different from the other two big-name retailers they had previously visited, being much smaller than either of them and containing only a select number of brands none of which were those you would expect to see in one of the big Highstreet stores. It was well known to everyone that I lived anywhere nearby that the store was owned by a local woman who tried hard to support small or independent clothing brands and give everyone a different choice than they would get from more mainstream stores. Both Macy and Victoria had come there regularly and while they loved to browse the various styles and fabrics, both found the prices to be slightly off-putting, usually being too high for either of them to afford. This trip proved to be no different than the others with only Victoria buying anything at all. Even Victoria only bought a single dress, it was reduced and while still being significantly costly she had been unable to resist the summery dress that was a retro black and white design. Despite the lack of purchases none of them felt the visit had been a waste of time and they had spent a considerable amount of time inside the quite small shop especially considering the limited number of items the store stocked.
Both Jack and Macy were extremely excited to go to the video game store that was only a few minutes' walk away so naturally with a shrug Victoria accompanied them. Victoria herself had no real interest in video games and quickly lost sight of them when they both ran off into the store like two small, exited children, both of them excitedly flittering between several racks of shelves, practically screeching at each other in their eager adulation. The store was not exactly large but bigger than Victoria had anticipated though the loud conversation between Jack and Macy helped her find them easily.
"Nurds." Victoria sighed with a shake of her head at the twin's antics.
She had found them hunched over a shelf in heated conversation over the game's main features and their obvious excitement for such things was entirely foreign to Victoria who could not understand why moving pixels with a controller would possibly appeal that much to anybody. When she pointed this out to them both, she did not get a great reception from them.
Jack pouted and pointed out that Victoria was being mean. His pout and feigned sadness prompted first, Macy and Victoria to wrap Jack in a protective embrace. By the end of their shopping trip, the twins had forced Victoria to accompany them to two other stores that she considered to be incredibly nerdy. One being a comic bookstore and the other being an ordinary bookstore. It nearly being time for them to leave, Victoria's mom was coming to pick them up, so they all decided to return to the food court and get a hot cup of cocoa before they left.
"Hi, Jack."
A male voice suppressed all three as they sat, unannounced Ther sidled up to them taking a seat on the opposite side of Jack from Victoria.
"I didn't expect to see you here. " Theo' explained, aiming the conversation at Jack, though not entirely to the exclusion of the other two, as he rested his arm slightly possessively on the back of Jack's chair. Jack said nothing but did slightly lean closer to Theo, his heart beating slightly faster than it had been a few moments before.
"Victoria invited us," Macy explained noticing the frosty atmosphere between Theo and Victoria who was currently giving Theo such violent death glares that if looks could kill she would have been accused of murder.
"I thought it would be nice for Jack," Victoria responded with barely contained animosity.
"I see, well I was just passing by and saw Jack and thought I would say hello. Maybe me and Jack could leave you two ladies for a bit." Theo flashed a daring grin in Victoria's direction.
Macy was still not sure what to make of this animosity, but it was very clear to her that Victoria was jealous for some reason and also that her brother had in some way become part of the equation.
"I'm afraid we were all just leaving," Victoria replied icily.
"Never mind then perhaps another time." Theo agreed to pull Jack into a less-than-manly embrace, an embrace that Jack readily returned, and that had Victoria's teeth clenched in an effort to contain her emotions. An embrace that Macy realised was more like that of a lover and not a friend.
When Macy and Jack returned with Victoria, Tara was almost certain it was her two daughters who were returning, bags of clothes gripped enthusiastically in exited hands. Jack seemed completely comfortable in his girly disposition despite Victoria's presence and his earlier qualms which had seen him leaving in as emphatically a boy mode as he was capable of. No doubt about it, Jack was returning even more utterly in girl mode than he had left in boy mode. Hands waving in girlish gesticulation voice high in enthusiastic conversation with the other two. Tara was a little surprised considering her son's obvious nervousness surrounding the whole idea and his earlier decision to go as a boy, even so, it took Tara only a couple of seconds to process the change in her son. Tara had long ago learned to accept both versions of her child and was usually unperturbed by the switch between the two which often left even those who were accepting of the change with emotional whiplash, yet she could not even pretend that this time had not caught her of guard. Tara was even more surprised when Jack and Victoria bid each other goodbye, both seemed to become self-conscious and painfully aware of the two mothers looking on. The sudden self-consciousness caused a hasty and slightly awkward embrace but neither had quite been able to hide their regret at not being able to express their emotions more clearly. Their hidden desire was not missed by Tara's motherly gaze. Briefly Tata considered what her husband would make of such an exchange. Her son was not exactly a manly boy but in girl mode like this, he was virtually indistinguishable from any other girl of his age. From the embrace she had just witnessed her son and Victoria looked more like lesbian lovers than a typical boy and girl. As they entered the house the twin's girlish conversation rose to include their mother describing how much fun they had and several of the outfits they had either seen or bought. After a few minutes, they left their mother to her own thoughts eagerly marching off to Macy's room trailing their shopping bags behind them.
At length, Tara composed herself and went up to find her children, in particular Macy. She could not shake the feeling that as a parent she should do something, in relation to her son's newfound interest in Victoria, at the very least she felt she should find out more about this. Going up the stairs Tara found both her children in Macy's room, both sat on Macy's bed, new outfits strewn about them. Tara asked for a word with Macy and the mother-daughter duo went down the stairs again to sit in the living room.
"I am glad you and Jack get no so well and you know I have never discouraged either of you in that way, I never wanted either of you to feel that there were things you couldn't do," Tara began haltingly unsure of how to broach the topic with her daughter. Macy nodded encouragingly still unsure what her mother was meaning to say.
"I guess I am just worried for Jack, I am not sure that it is the best thing for him to be dragged along with you and your friends. I don't want anyone embracing him or making things difficult for him. He shouldn't be a third wheel or anything." Tara told her daughter worry creasing her brow.
Macy laughed brightly. "Of course, not mom but that's not how this is, Victoria invited us both but I think that really it was Jack she wanted to invited. If anyone was a third wheel it was me. Recently Victoria and Jack have been so close, I think they are fast becoming best friends."
Tara took in this new information in wide-eyed surprise. While Jack and Macy had always been close Jack had never really had close friends in the way Macy had. What friends
Jack had, had over the years were those he played sports with, most of these were other boys who Jack had, had little else in common with. While Macy's friends had never actively discouraged Jack from friendship with them as far as Tara knew, Tara was aware that none of them had ever really attempted to befriend Jack. Victoria's supposed budding friendship with Jack was a little surprising but not unwelcome to Tara, Jack needed to find more people who would care for him and support to him, Tara reflected. Shaking herself out of the train of thought, Tara's thoughts returned to the other area of her concern, the obvious attraction between Jack and Victoria. Deciding on subtlety Tara began to question Macy.
Macy for her part took a moment to consider her responses. She and Jack shared many things and enjoyed a relationship that was not shared by most of her friends who had siblings. Her relationship with Jack contained both a sisterly and brotherly aspect to it and Macy took joy in both, Jack was both her overly protective brother and her supportive sister more obsessed than she was with cute clothes and makeup. Macy did not want to endanger that unique relationship; she and Jack told each other things that they would never tell anyone else. She wasn't sure what to tell her mother, what Jack wouldn't mind their mother knowing. Finally, Macy settled on what to say, she decided that she would only tell her mother what she knew for certain about Jack and Victoria, she would not tell her mother anything Jack had let slip to her, nor would she tell her mother anything that she suspected. That included Victoria's jealousy and the attraction that Macy suspected them both of feeling for each other. Tara nodded to her daughter's answers, she suspected that her daughter knew more than she was saying, but decided not to press her any further. Tara could not shack the knowledge of the lust she had seen in both her son's and Victoria's eyes. Maybe he should talk to her son Tara reflected slowly; he had never expressed any romantic interest in anyone before girl or boy, and might need a bit of guidance from his mother.
Usually, Tara would have left that kind of conversation to Phillip especially since Jack was his son and Tara supposed in most family dynamics such situations would best be dealt with by some father son bonding time. Yet Tara knew better than to suggest that with Jack, there were multiple reasons that such a scenario would not ever work for them. The first being that Jack had never had that kind of relationship with his father, even if he had, Jack had always been different than most boys. That led to the second complication Phillip had proved long ago that he would never accept his son's feminine side in any meaningful way, that alone had driven a wedge between Phillip and Jack. The third factor was Phillip himself, not for the first time Tara wondered why she had married him. Always focused on his career, for many years Tara had felt that he cared more for that than he did for anyone else. Tara herself was lucky if she spoke to her husband more than once a week while he was away, which had been more often than not over the last few years, Tara knew that Jack spoke to Phillip even less than that. Tara sighed at the thought, it was bad enough that her husband ignored her but as his wife but it nearly moved her to tears to think the man, she had married would do that to his children.
So due to her husband's failings and Jack's feminine tendencies, Tara had gotten used to having conversations with her son that were usually the sole domain of Mothers and their daughters. At least her son's interest in Victoria answered or at least gave some insight into her son's sexuality Something that Tara had been unsure of for many years. While it mattered little to Tara it was something she had considered over the years, there were times, especially when the twins played together with dolls or talked together as children about weddings, that Tara had been forced to wonder.
The light of morning glittered through windows as Tara hurried towards the front door. An unexpected knock on the door had interrupted her morning cup of coffee, something that Tara was at that moment nursing her annoyance at. In truth, Tara was more than slightly annoyed, although, with every passing moment, she was calming herself or at least getting ready to present an air of reasonable calmness, her morning cup of coffee was the time that Tara used to think and prepare for the day. This Morning Tara felt she had fare too much to think over, she had not really known what to say to Jack yesterday evening and had decided for better or for worse to delay any type of action in regard to the conversation she needed to have with Jack until the next day in order that she might be better able to consider how she might even begin to approach such a conversation. Her mind still hummed in mild confusion over the things she now knew and those she guessed in regard to her son's recent newfound feelings for Victoria. And Tara was still working through the implications and was no closer to knowing how to start a conversation with Jack about it when she was rudely interrupted. Tara had hoped for inspiration while drinking her customary morning cup of coffee but that was now interrupted and her thoughts unproductive though they might have been, had been scattered by that interruption. In some ways, it would have been easier, if Jack had been a girl she reflected as she went to open the door, then as soon as the thought came Tara recoiled at it. She had always tried to be supportive to her children and that kind of outdated stereotyping was not helpful to either them or her. Still in this case there was a grain of truth in the unwelcome thought, when talking to Jack Tara never was never entirely sure which version she would be addressing, the slightly effeminate boy or the obviously girly, girl. There were a number of occasions where that difficulty had made parenting Jack quite challenging, a number of times where Tara had misjudged and her message had been taken poorly by Jack. Tara fervently hoped that however, when she approached the topic of Victoria with Jack later today, she would not be caught out by that at least.
Tara opened the door and was quite surprised to see an apparently very nervous youth standing before her. Stockily built with wide shoulders the boy looked uniquely uncomfortable, hands thrust deep into the pockets of his smart jeans, in a mannerism ubiquitous with perturbed men especially younger ones. The boy who had until that moment been looking down at his shoes finally noticed Tara's presence and looked up staring at her with wide eyes that further told of his current anxious disposition. The boy was Jack and Macy's age obviously more at home in sports pants it was clear with his hair neatly spiked with gel and wearing jeans that the boy had done his best to dress up at least as far as the inflexibility of boys his age would allow. Tara eyed this youth for a few second fixedly the boy becoming more and more anxious under her appraising gaze, the longer that gaze lasted the more agitated the boy appeared to become.
"I suppose you are here to see Macy." Tara surmised when at last it appeared the boy could no longer take the apprehension of the evaluating look she had been giving him. Hands resting on her hips, Tara tried her best to be the very model of a stern and intimidating parent.
The boy looked shocked for a few seconds before recovering his composing with a genial smile that lit up his features, displaying his normally affable personality which had only been hidden by the immensity of his nervous anxiety. A small slight shake of his head, added to that genial display as he dispelled Tara's incorrect assumption.
"No, not really," The boy told her sheepishly trying to be as respectful as possible while being as nervous as he was. "I am Theo, a friend of your son, Jack. I was hoping to see him if he is in."
Despite her surprise and the implications of all of this Tara resolved to think of all that later and wasted little time in inviting Theo inside and at the same time calling upstairs to let her son know he had a visitor. Her son appeared only a few seconds later on the stairs silky, smooth, soft hair tied back in a long high ponytail that bobbed with every step he took, wearing a set of navy-blue leggings that hugged his thighs and calves tightly and his Detroit tiger's baseball polo. Jack smiled brightly as his eyes came to rest on Theo, skipping down the last steps Jack allowed the bigger much more muscled boy to fold him into a tight embrace. Tara, stood forgotten by the other two, watching Jack melt into Theo's arms in a manner that made to Tara at once resentful and jealous. It reminded her of how much she did not have with Phillip away constantly. The feeling of his strong protective arms about her, the powerful ineffable feeling of being adored with all the love and passion another can feel. It was a heady feeling and an addiction that Tara now could hardly believe she had nearly forgotten the sole aching need to feel. She had never needed that love, that embrace to be a woman, but she could not deny that she had never felt more womanly than when she was being held tight in Phillips's arms. It had been close to two years maybe even three years since Phillip had last ordained to hold his wife like that, it was becoming difficult for Tara to
remember what it was like to be held like that, yet still, if she concentrated hard enough Tara fancied, she could still feel the ghost of his touch, those strong warm arms about her the soft husky timbre of his, gravely voice above her protective and yet dripping with desire for her. A conflicted look of passionate affection which had been as evident in his words and voice as it was in his eyes when they had finally separated, that had always made Tara's legs weak at the knees. Watching the scene play out before her, Tara was only marginally surprised to see that a similar look from Theo had Jack reacting in the same manner to how she remembered reacting to Jack's father.
Totally ignoring the presence of Jack's mother, the two rushed off to Jack's room an easy gentle conversation flowing between them. Tara watched them go still shocked at the recent development. She heard Jack's door click closed above her and briefly wondered if she should tell them to keep the door open, it is what she would do if it were Macy and a boy or Jack and Victoria yet she wasn't quite sure under the circumstances what she was supposed to do. It didn't seem very responsible to leave them up there with a closed door, especially with the look she had seen her son give Theo and the way they had wrapped each other in such a loving embrace, it certainly worried Tara no end. Equally, she was not even sure that Jack was aware of his feelings and she didn't want to embrace him or Theo. Strolling back into the kitchen Tara busied herself making yet another cup of coffee this was definitely a more than one cup of coffee morning she decided. That conversation with Jack, which Tara had been planning to have, had just gotten a whole lot more complex and complicated.
That evening Tara sat relaxing on the sofa, all in all, things hadn't gone as badly as Tara had feared they might. Theo had stayed several hours before departing in the afternoon. A blushing Jack had confided to her that they had spent most of that time curled up together lying on Jack's bed watching TV on his laptop. Nothing serious had happened between the two that of them, nothing would have alarmed Tara, but Jack did speak dreamily about being held by Theo. They had talked a lot about first Theo and then Victoria. As they went on, Jack's confusion, the dilemma he was stuck in, became more and more apparent to Tara. It hurt her heart to not be able to do more for Jack than to listen to him, even her guidance was of little help. It was clear that Jack had passionate newly discovered feelings for both Theo and Victoria. Those feelings were causing her son no end of anguish and confusion.
"How do I choose between them, Mom, these feelings are all so new, I wish I understood them more, maybe then I would know what to do. I just don't understand how I feel, or what I want. Theo makes me feel so safe and warm, he is so pretty in a ruggish boy kind of a way. I really like being around him, but Victoria makes me feel so alive and adventurous. She is just as pretty but in a more subtle soft feminine way. Theo likes lots of the same sports I like and talking is easy between us, but Victoria gets my humour better, we always end up giggling when we are together. How can I possibly choose between them? They both make me feel giddy when they are close by and I miss both of them when they are not with me, even when one of them is and the other isn't. Being held by either of them is so good, it's like being wrapped up in love, it's magical."
"Follow your heart, it will know and remember that you are still only fifteen, you don't have to know yet." Tara had soothed him, pulling him into a motherly hug.
"What if it doesn't?"
"It will," Tara had told him confidently, then a few moments later and more retrospectively she continued with a sigh. "I really hoped I would have another year before things like this came up, for both you and Macy. I guess I never figured on you being such a little temptress." A smile played softly over her lips at this last sentence and quickly turned to laughter, laughter so infectious it soon spread to Jack as well until they both sat huddled together giggling.
Now sat on the sofa thinking back on the day's events, Tara could not help but be slightly worried for her son. A son that so often now seemed like a daughter. It was a dangerous situation he had unwittingly sound himself in one that Tara would have far rather he had not, Tara had never been in that situation but her best friend in high school had when she was only a year or two older than Jack was now. The two boneheaded testosterone-filled territorial idiots had beaten each other up over the poor girl. Tara had spent days consoling the girt and nursing the battered girl's injuries. The bruising and black eye had been unintentionally inflicted when the misguided girl had tried to intervene in the violent struggle, she had herself provoked. Tara could only hope that Victoria and Theo would be less violent and more civil than that. That they would not give in to their violent impulses as quickly as her friend's boyfriends had all those years ago. Both seemed rational and sensible enough, but you could never be sure with something like that and the fact that there was less testosterone in one of Jack's suitors did nothing to calm Tara's growing fears. She had seen just how violent women can get in situations like this when one of her other friends had broken up with her girlfriend. The two lesbians had caused a domestic which necessitated the police with the visceral hate and violence between them, despite the decided lack of testosterone.
"So how was Theo yesterday?" Macy asked her brother, the light of yet another bright and beautiful morning filtering through the windows.
"We had a good time mostly just watched things and talked." Jack admitted easily, ignoring his sister's amused expression.
Macy was about to question Jack further when his phone buzzed with a notification. Jack's hand immediately leapt to grab it, causing Macy to grin even wider this time. Jack had few friends and few contacted him regularly enough for him to be constantly texting him but since Victoria had become his friend Macy had seldom seen her brother without his phone in his hand, either responding to or reading one of Victoria's texts.
Looking over at Jack's beaming grin, Macy couldn't help but let out a small giggle. Jack looked up met his sister's eyes and Macy's giggling became infectious. After several minutes when they had both stopped giggling, Macy asked Jack what had caused his grinning in the first place.
"Victoria just invited me over to this afternoon." Jack explained showing Macy the messages excitedly.
Macy nodded after reading the text. Victoria was indeed inviting Jack over, Macy noted that her name wasn't mentioned at the same time that Jack realised it.
"I'm sure you'd be welcome to come as well, sis." Jack belatedly offered.
Macy was already shaking her head as Jack spoke. Victoria had deliberately not mentioned her name along with the invite, Macy was certain this was because Victoria wanted to spend some time alone with Jack. Not to mention Macy was not sure she wanted to be third web wheel to Victoria and Jack again, such a position got very awkward fairly fast. Whatever Jack and Victoria were to one another Marcy was certain that she didn't want to be in between them while they figured it. Not to mention Jack didn't socialise much with other people, on one of the rare occasions where he was Macy felt it would be better if he did that without her acting as a buffer between him and those he was interacting with.
As usual, Jack's feelings on which gender he should look, feel, and act like flip-flopped throughout the day. He had woken up feeling as male as the society expected him to be, but after talking with both his sister and Victoria, Jack was definitely in a much more feminine state of mind and being. The thought of seeing Victoria's parents jarred Jack into considering his appearance, and how they might view him and he immediately ran to Macy to consult with her about everything.
Jack's immediate instinct had been to dress in one of the cute outfits he had bought while shopping with Victoria and was quite upset when Macy patiently explained that that wasn't a good idea. Jack wanted to argue with her but could totally see the sent sense of her argument. Victoria's parents didn't know Jack that well and neither Jack nor Macy could be entirely sure how they would react if Jack turned up in full-on girl mode. Not for the first time did Jack wish that he had more control over his emotions and when he felt feminine or not. It wasn't like a button he pushed though; it was a lot more complex than that Jack wondered briefly again whether a boy had the right to feel, or should feel the way he felt. Then Jack pushed that ongoing invasive thought to the side to focus on infinitely more important things, clothes.
In the end, Macy was able to help Jack, who she knew was firmly entrenched in girl mode, select a compromise outfit. A blouse that was not too overly feminine was selected, as Macy had pointed out, most men are far too unobservant to realise that the 'shirt' Jack was wearing buttoned the wrong way. Best of all it was one of the ones that Jack had with got during the shopping trip with Macy and Victoria. Which made Jack feel considerably happier even if he couldn't wear one of the more overtly feminine outfits he had initially wanted to wear. Macy found some girls jeans in one of Jack's draws, they were black and went well with the blouse. The jeans had no obvious patterns that indicated they were women's jeans, so while Jack could still feel feminine in his girly clothes, unless someone examined the clothes or the clothes tags carefully nothing would look unusual.
The effect, once Jack was dressed, was exactly as Macy had intended. The clothes fitted Jack's slender figure well. The cut of the clothes and Jack's own girlish physique combined to give a very natural. Girlish look. But the clothes were plain enough that the entire look could easily be explained away as a metrosexual boy's look. Macy hummed and smiled as Jack twirled about in front of her, she was exceptionally pleased with her efforts.
As Jack left to walk to Victoria's house, Macy found herself very glad that she had this unusual relationship with Jack, at times it was like having a sister. Macy knew as they got older this would disappear, idly she wondered if it was selfish to take as much pleasure in this unusual relationship and to want to cling so tightly to every memory of it. Pushing those thoughts to the side Macy found herself deeply worried for Jack, Macy was still unsure of his strange new relationship with Victoria, a girl that Macy had never been especially close to and had never fully trusted. Worse there seemed to be a romantic element to that new friendship, an element that she was unsure either Jack or Victoria were fully aware existed. Worse Jack's relationship with Theo had suddenly seemed to have taken on a romantic element that Macy was certain Jack did not realise existed. Overall, it seemed to Macy that Jack was far over his head with two extremely complex romantic situations at the same time. Macy could not help but feel the sinking crushing weight of apprehension settle on her heart, Jack was so unprepared to deal with this and Macy could not stand the thought of Jack getting his heart broken. Sadly, it seemed one way or the other Jack was headed for just such a disaster and Macy felt helpless, unsure how she was supposed to protect Jack from both himself and others in this scenario.
Jack was greeted warmly by Victoria who pulled him into a tight embrace warm with feeling and regard, as soon as he arrived at her door. Though he was slightly saddened to think that really she had greeted him as she would any of her girlfriends. Still, their relationship was new to them both and complicated making Victoria's greeting understandable to Jack, who soon forgot that thought, so distracted was he by the fluttering of his heart as he leaned his head on Victoria's shoulder and Victoria's heartbeat, fast like his own as she pulled him ever closer to her. Jack found himself and any thoughts he had previously had lost in Victoria's strong arms, her feminine floral perfumed scent, her slim figure fitting so well into his arms. Jack was lost in the moment and never wanted it to end, and in truth, Victoria was in the same position. She clung onto Jack and wished more than ever that she could truly understand her own feelings towards Jack, despite her mother's presence, Victoria with Jack in her arms could not help but want to kiss him and hold him tight. Tighter and more lovingly than any friend ever could, Victoria settled for holding him for as long as she could before letting Jack go and introducing him to her mother and father. As Victoria pulled away she playfully tucked a stray lock of Jack's long hair behind his ear.
Jack could not help but feel disappointment as Victoria pulled away from him, but quickly recovered himself as he was introduced to her parents. Both Victoria's mother and her father were cordial in their greeting of Jack though it soon became clear that neither of them were sure how to react to him due to neither was at all sure of which sex he was. Victoria's mother clearly thought he was an effeminate boy but was just as clearly unsure of her judgment. While Victoria's dad was it appeared quite certain that Jack was a girl but not entirely ready to bet on that certainty for fear of causing a scene. After a short while and the usual pleasantries, Victoria's dad left them. Moments later Victoria's younger sister came racing into the kitchen where they had all been standing chatting awkwardly, no one realising just how much more awkward things were going to get in the next handful of minutes.
Jack was introduced to Suzie who was eight years old and full of both energy and questions. Jack was immediately taken with the young girl who wasted no time in peppering him with lots of the aforementioned questions. Suzie for her part seemed to be fascinated by both Jack and especially his long hair. Suzie herself was just beginning to grow hers out of the bob her mother had had it cut to all of the little girl's life. Her hair was not yet even really properly shoulder length which her older sister's hair was. Jack's hair was longer than either of them with voluminous curls hanging down past his shoulders and a little way down his back.
Every question Suzie asked made Jack more and more nervous, he still had no idea how Victoria's parents would react to the gender issue. He was confident that at the moment he had so far gotten away with it. It wasn't really so much lying Jack felt as much as it was people seeing what they expected to see, over the years he had become comfortable like that whichever way he presented. People didn't often question what seemed obvious to their eyes and Jack was fine with that often using it to his advantage, yet he did not like lying to people outright and knew if he were asked directly then he would have no other option than to tell the truth. Predictably that was exactly what happened mere moments later and Jack with a sight revealed that he was in fact a boy, not the girl Victoria's father had supposed him to be.
Suzie didn't seem to care one bit in the peculiar way that often children do. It did not matter in her world and had no real meaning so that bit of meaningless information was immediately ignored by her. She went on talking to Jack as if nothing had happened, without even a pause. The only acknowledgement of Jack's answer from Suzie was a passing comment that not many boys had hair as long or as soft and bouncy looking as he did. In truth, Jack was glad of Suzie's continued conversation. Victoria's mother had gone very silent and Jack felt it would be even more awkward if the room had fallen completely silent, Suzie's constant conversation also helped keep Jack from worrying about what Victoria's mother and later her father would think.
Victoria's mother now only slightly shocked sought and found her daughter's eyes. The look was clear, they would be discussing this later. It now seemed clear the sauce of Victoria's self-proclaimed confusion of recent weeks. Victoria had refused to admit to her mother that there was anyone she liked, but Victoria's mother knew her daughter well, there was no hiding what was right before her. Victoria seemed deeply enamoured with this young man. Though it was difficult to consider him in such a manner, especially standing before him, he wasn't even trying to appear female and yet he seemed so feminine. It wasn't just the hair although that didn't help. It was the whole accumulative effect, the animated hand gestures, the graceful way he moved, even his voice had a higher pitch than she would have expected from a boy. His voice had such a girlish lilt to it, musical like a girl. No boy she had ever met had a musical voice like that. Victoria's mother knew instantly that she would need to have a long and not entirely pleasant conversation with her daughter, and an even less pleasant conversation with her husband, she winced as she thought what he would think of this.
Jack and Victoria stayed in town talking to Suzie for a while before heading up to Victoria's room, Victoria's mother who had not quite recovered from the revolution of Jack's gender did have the presence of mind to caution her daughter before they the left to keep the door open. She could only watch in stunned silence as the two girls, she could hardly think of them as at them as anything but, despite her newfound knowledge of Jack, hands clasped together walked out of the room eager to be at last alone together. Jack was so obviously a girl both visually and often in mannerisms that the truth seemed so incongruous with what was clearly before her eyes that it seemed to outweigh anything else.
Entering Victoria's room it was immediately dear that it was a girl's room, the walls were a light pale pink colour and a number of pale pink scatter cushions were dotted around the room. A vanity and full-length mirror were placed to one side of the room, it was also clear that Victoria at least made an effort to tidy her room. But that was the end of the femininity a heap of forgotten books and a couple of used cups showed that Victoria was far from perfect in keeping her room clean and an all-girl rock band poster was pinned to the pale pink wall. All this Jack took in, in the first few seconds of entering but not before Victoria had picked up on Jack's gaze.
"I know, I know, my mom especially has always had this image of me as a fairy princess or something," Victoria shrugged helplessly.
"I have got her to back down on the outfits at least mostly but I still can't get her or dad to agree to redecorate my room. "
"No, it's very nice, very pretty, I like it. My dad insisted on painting. My room in this monotonous single shade blue colour," Jack scrunched up his face in a look of disgust.
"So I can definitely empathise on that point."
Pulling Jack into a warm embrace Victoria laughed lightly.
"So, what colour would you have liked?" Jack let a slight warm tingly shudder creep down his back as he leaned into the embrace. Shutting his eyes for a moment he took in the sensations and his own overwhelmed feelings. Victoria's body seemed to fit around him well, it wasn't as all-encompassing as Theo's embraces, different but very similar at the same time, just as the two people themselves, but the feelings they invoked remained constant Jack felt every bit as safe, protective and the same sense of belonging in Victoria's arms as Theo's. Victoria's warmth was accompanied by a soft floral feminine scent while Theo had a stronger more masculine scent, a mix of his deodorant and the mint shampoo and shower gel he habitually used, but both were equally intoxicating to Jack. Jack felt the same butterflies in the pit of his stomach as he had around Theo and he already knew that he felt the same pull to be near Victoria as he did to be near Theo.
Jack had to pull away slightly to be able to allow his overwhelmed heart and mind to consider Victoria's question.
"I don't know, a pale blue with maybe a purple or pale pink accents."
"Sounds perfect for you." Victoria told him, only half listening as she pulled him closer to her.
Her arms about him Victoria's lips sought and found Jack's in a bright hot explosion of pent-up passion. Victoria's tongue found Jack's and surprise but not displeasure was visible on Jack's face. Jack was considerably taken aback by Victoria's hasty lust but found her passion heating up his own emotions. Now that they were pressed together like this Victoria and her body had become the sole focus of Jack's world and he could not imagine wanting to change that. Suddenly Victoria's tongue which had been playing a flirtatious game with Jack's own retreated from his own and began playing instead over Jack's lower lip and Victoria's hand which had been placed on Jack's lower back crept under his t-shirt running up and down the soft delicate skin in a passionate massage that allowed Victoria to feel all the small hard muscles of his lower back. A massage that, made Jack moan involuntarily into Victoria's mouth. Eventually, they pulled apart as much for oxygen as anything else and began to marshal control over themselves again, although not before Victoria in the act of reluctantly pulling away had worried Jack's lip playfully with her beat teeth her lust-filled eyes staring directly into Jack's in a dominance filled moment that had, had Jack week at the knees.
"Come on lover boy let's go lie down on my bed and watch something," A naughty glint came to her eyes burning there with intensity. "Never heard of Netflix and chill?"
"V....Victoria I don't think I'm ready for that." Jack stammered out his eyes downcast, shocked by her words.
"I know that silly, I was just joking." Victoria comforted all trace of the lust gone from her eyes and expression, pulling him close in a friendly less passionate embrace and leading him towards her bed. Sitting down on her bed Victoria found Jack a tissue to dab the tears that had begun to roll down his cheeks away. Leaving only Victoria to internally chastise herself for her poorly thought-out word choice.
A long while was spent by Victoria and Jack in this way curled up together watching TV on Victoria's computer with brief interludes of intense passionate kissing and hugs. Until they were interrupted by Victoria's little sister who walked into Victoria's room to demand they both play with her. So from then on the couple spent the day involved in imaginary tea parties and learning the names of Suzie's teddy bear collection, with occasional breaks for Suzie to admire and play with Jack's long sleek hair. Before he left though, Jack did manage to talk to Victoria about Macy's idea of a pre-cheerleading practice and Victoria promised to round up several of the girls for a practice the following day.
It was not long after Jack's departure that Victoria found herself collared by her mother for a mother-daughter discussion, something that Victoria was not at all surprised by. Victoria knew that she had well and truly let the secret of her crush on Jack blow to the wind for all to see as soon as Jack had arrived. Once again Victoria found herself wondering about her self-control around Jack, at best she didn't seem to have any inhibitions and at worst she found herself acting like a horny boy. It was difficult for Victoria to accept as that urgency boys so often displayed was one of the traits that Victoria had always found unsettling, it was not something Victoria was happy to discover about herself. She would do better, Victoria chastised herself wordlessly, not just because that side of herself scared her just a little bit, but because she didn't want to scare Jack away. All unknowingly Victoria knew she had done that already, had hurt Jack like, made him feel small and that what they had between them came with a price. Victoria especially hated that aspect of this, she didn't like that she had made him feel that way and she didn't like the idea of making Jack upset one bit, so she reasoned she would have to do much better at keeping some level of control around him.
"Your boyfriend ... was ... nice." Victoria's mother began hesitantly, in truth the topic was so massive that truly she had no idea where to begin.
"Yeah," Victoria sighed and replied dreamily. "He is isn't he."
This only served to make Victoria's mother more uncomfortable, and less certain where to begin. She decided that as a mother she had to force herself to have this conversation with her daughter and decided on a different more direct approach.
"Is he, a boy I mean?"
Victoria considered for a moment de sore before answering. A pause that seemed to put her mother even further on edge.
"For the moment he has told me he is so he is. But he has got a very feminine vibe to him that does undermine that, I don't think it would surprise me too much if at some point he realises that she is a girl. But until he tells me that then he is a he."
"But his hair." Victoria's mother was trying desperately to take in her daughter's logic and it was already hurting her head.
"I know, and I have seen him in girls' clothes as well, he looked really cute. But clothes and long hair won't and doesn't make him a girl any more than I would be a boy if I shaved my hair and wore exclusively boy clothes. It takes more than that."
Victoria's mother sighed, she couldn't disagree with her daughter.
"Well, I don't know what your father will think. I know he was hoping for your boyfriends to be a couple of years down the line and manly men who he can talk about football and baseball with. Jack seems more likely to want to talk about the colour of the nail varnish you or he are wearing. God help us if he turns up in a dress, I think your father might despair."
"Daddy will just have to get used to the idea that's all, if my boyfriend turns up in a dress, he will just have to lump it and at least be civil. As for sports I don't know about football but I do know that Jack is very interested in baseball and even the wants to try out for the high school baseball team next year."
You will have to be patient with him, Victoria, with me as well, it's a lot to take in. I mean if you were only gay that would be one thing, but this, this is a lot more," Then another thought sprang to her mother's mind. " Are you sure about this, Victoria, you told me before that you thought you might be gay. This isn't some type of rebellion against that."
"No." Victoria told her simply but flatly, she knew in her own mind that what she felt for Jack was far more than that.
"OK, then baby. As long as you know what that. I don't want either you or that poor boy hurt by this I will talk to your father but god knows what he will make of all this." Victoria's mother pulled Victoria into a much-needed motherly embrace after the tying and emotional conversation.
Jack stood outside his sister's bedroom door considering if he really wanted to talk about this with her. Somehow the topic seemed deeply personal and he had been debating whether to talk to Macy about it all the way home from Victoria's house yet he felt he desperately needed to talk about it with someone and he really didn't want to talk about it with his mother, that would be far to awkward. Finally making up his mind Jack entered and began talking almost immediately as if fearing that if he didn't then he wouldn't at all.
"Sis, is it normal for someone to want to move forward when dating quicker than the other is comfortable with?"
Macy wearing a onesie and sprawled out on her bed took a moment to answer. In truth, it was something she and her friends had talked about often but like everything with her brother how to phrase her answer was critical.
"Yeah, it's fairly normal, especially if the couple are alone for any length of time. Attraction leads to kissing and kissing to aggressive petting and sooner or later to somewhere that truthfully neither are ready for, especially at our ages, usually it's the man who tries to push things. A couple of girls in my friendship group crudely put it as guys get too horny far too easily. But that is by no means exclusively guys."
"Thanks, sis," Jack feeling marginally better about everything told her slightly revealed. "It's just with Theo yesterday it was mostly nice and he is very understanding but even then there were a couple of times I could tell he really wanted to take things further and I am really not ready for that yet. Then today with Victoria it was amazing and I really like her but there were a couple of times today where she really tried to push things but I really didn't want to go there yet with her either."
Macy's eyes softened slightly.
"Don't let them, either of them, push you further than you are comfortable with." Tell them to stop and take a step away from whichever it is, give them space to let passion ebb away. Remember you are not obligated to do anything, that should never be a requirement, no matter what anyone says. If either of them doesn't stop when you tell them to, they will have me to deal with and I promise you I will find a way to hurt them."