Robert looked at the beautiful young girl in the mirror. She was wearing a sleek red silk dress with Asian emblems on it, held on her slender form by spaghetti straps. Her modest breasts barely registered to the casual eye but the vivid red lipstick enhanced her mouth and the smoky eye makeup she had expertly applied gave her face a striking beauty and her long black hair that descended over her shoulders framed her beautifully, The dress ended mid thigh and then her slim legs showed down to the bright red 4 inch heeled shoes she balanced casually on. She knew that most Asian girls wouldn’t wear such a heel but she wasn’t Asian, despite the dress, and she knew that when she walked in the heels she felt elegant and attractive and interesting – a creature that would turn heads and attract every available male that saw her.
Robert’s gaze turned to the alarm clock at his bedside. He had work in the morning and would need to rise early to avoid being late. His superior was a real ball-breaker and she seemed to be targeting him – picking on him for any minor misdemeanour and humiliating him in front of his fellow workers, As the only male in the Administration Department he wondered if his only fault was being a man and at that thought he had to give a wry smile because in many ways he felt there may be some common ground there.
Robert sighed to the girl in the mirror. “Thank you for another lovely evening, but I need to call a halt to things. Maybe I could see you again tomorrow – I’ll be free all weekend and we could spend the whole two days any way you wanted?” He blew her a kiss which she returned in a perfect synchronised response and gave a little smile. “I’d really enjoy that” she said in her soft voice.
Robert sighed once more and stepped away so he could no longer see her reflection. Sitting on his bed he took off his high heels and then pulled down the zip of the dress that was between his shoulders, taking care to remove the outfit without it touching his face. He hung it up on a hanger to keep it crease free and then walked into the bathroom to wash off the make up, remove the nail varnish on his hands and then ease off the breast forms he had applied earlier that evening. Glancing at his reflection he realised he had missed one more item and he removed the wig he had been wearing and took it through and placed it on the head form that would reduce the risk of tangles.
The girl in the mirror was no more. Now as Robert looked in the bathroom mirror he saw the 30 year old virgin he despised and was embarrassed by. Robert Mitchell. Only child of Arthur and Millicent Mitchell, both deceased. His father was, by all reports, a jovial and well regarded man who had died when struck by a drunk driver when his son was only 6 years old. The impact of that loss was felt deeply by Robert’s mother who had lost her one true love and withdrew back into herself, shunning social contact. Robert’s father had worked in Insurance and had a life insurance policy that paid out sufficient funds to keep bread on the table after his death but young Robert was soon doing paper deliveries and other odd jobs to supplement this income and was doing chores sweeping garages and stores while his schoolmates were out playing or meeting in social groups.
Robert was a bit of a loner, “the man of the house” from far too young an age and therefore subservient to his mother who dominated who he was and what he did. It was she who eventually took him to the doctors when his voice hadn’t broken and his facial hair hadn’t emerged like all the other boys his age and the shame of being 15 and having your mother report you were lacking testosterone production at that age was just another embarrassment that Robert had to bear. After several tests the Doctors concluded that young Robert’s body was not capable of producing the male hormone without external stimulus and so he was prescribed tablets to take each day.
It was humiliating for Robert to have to swallow a pill each morning and evening to tell his body he was male and should have muscles, hair and a penis that would react to the sight of a pretty young girl. It made him feel less masculine than all the others in school and although his voice did drop in pitch a little, his limbs and face were still largely hair free and his appendage was only fit for passing urine. Not that he felt that really mattered. Robert had no attention from the girls in school and actually felt no sexual attraction whatsoever at the low hormonal levels he was at. When after 9 months of use, the tablets had achieved next to no noticeable improvement in his appearance, Robert gradually stopped taking them, accepting that he was never going to be the sports jock or hunk that the girls went for.
On leaving school Robert took the first job he could find. He now needed to be the breadwinner for his mother and himself and he needed a reliable regular income to support the household. Therefore he took an administrative post within the local government organisation. His upbringing had ensured he was organised and methodical which were ideal values in local government and his mother had drummed in the importance of values and responsibility, having seen the havoc one drunken driver could do to a family.
Robert’s work was mundane and unimaginative but he knew it was a means to an end. It was a way to heat the house and keep its occupants fed and clothed and so just as he had done with the pocket money chores of his youth, he got his head down and worked to his best abilities. His department was composed of 8 females of varying ages so when there was a social event he never joined them, knowing their conversation would be of no interest to him nor his to them. At 5ft 6 inches with size 6 feet and a slim 140lbs in weight he was no target for female attention, so the workplace was just where he spent five days a week and had no other impact on his life.
At home he took his share of the chores although his slender frame meant he wasn’t much use on the heavy tasks around the home or garden. His mother was increasingly less able to take on those tasks either as her mental state deteriorated and she fell into a depression that saw her retiring to her bedroom earlier and earlier each year.
Millicent had been a fashionable young lady when she married Robert’s father and they had enjoyed 15 years of happy marriage travelling together and enjoying each other’s company before they decided to start a family when Millicent was in her mid 30s. Robert’s had been a difficult birth and that made the decision simple – he would be an only child. When tragedy struck and Arthur was taken from her, Millicent boxed up all of the bright, party clothes she had enjoyed wearing and placed them in the loft, unable to throw away their link with the life she shared with her beloved husband but at the same time knowing she would never wear them again as they evoked memories that only brought pain to her mind. The drunk driver had effectively taken her life along with her husbands,
It was when Robert had just turned 30 and his mother 66 that Millicent Mitchell was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer. She had found a lump many months before and had done nothing about it, adding it to the list of woes she accepted as being her fate and not telling anyone about until her general health had been affected and Robert had found her crying in pain from a swollen and discoloured breast, He had called a doctor who had arranged for an immediate double mastectomy as traces of the cancer were in both sides. Then the spread was detected and further treatments began. Robert bought his mother prosthetic breasts to try to raise her spirits but the spread of the disease was accelerating and nothing could be done to save her.
The loss of his mother was a great sadness for Robert, although he knew they had never been particularly close due to his mother’s depression and his own diminished sense of worth. He went on cleaning the house and doing the chores as before, only now there was only one mouth to feed. Cleaning out his mother’s bedroom reminded him that there were boxes of her clothes in the loft and he went and brought them back down so that he could prepare the lot for disposal. Perhaps the charity shops would find some of her clothes suitable to sell.
He burst open the first of the boxes and found party frocks that looked as though they had been worn only once. They were still vivid in colour and still had a slight whiff of perfume about them despite being bagged and boxed 24 years before. One dress in particular caught his eye, It looked as if it were made of silk – a simple yet beautiful red oriental dress. He held it in his hands and gasped as it slid through his fingers as though made of liquid. What would something this soft feel like against your skin if you wore it, he asked himself. He felt he needed to find out. He closed the curtains in the room and began to undress.
He knew his mother was relatively close to his own height but he wondered if he was wasting his time contemplating trying it on. One glance at the outfit though made his mind up. He had never seen anything so pretty and soft to the touch and he knew he needed to feel it on his body. Down to his underpants, he reached out and slowly lowered the zip on the back of the dress. Even touching this little area of it sent a tingle down Robert’s spine. His mouth felt dry and beads of sweat were appearing on his brow. He was getting excited by this little red dress, although his appendage remained as flaccid as always.
Robert took a deep breath and slid his head and arms into the dress and pulled it down over his shoulders. He gasped as he felt it ripple down his torso like a waterfall. The dress seemed weightless with barely a pull on the spaghetti straps and although snug to his body, it felt extremely comfortable and didn’t seem to snag anywhere. He managed to get a hand over his shoulder to pull up the back zip and secure the dress in place.
He took a few moments to simply enjoy the feeling of the dress before moving over to the wall mirror in the room. He threw his hand over his mouth when he saw his reflection. The dress looked absolutely gorgeous on him. It was quite short – reaching above the knee – but not in a slutty way. This was an elegant dress that would be set off by a beautiful clutch handbag and a pair of red shoes. As soon as he thought that he turned to the box. Perhaps she has stowed just such accessories in the box!
20 minutes of emptying the boxes later, Robert had found shoes and a handbag that were clearly to be worn with this dress. His mother and him had shared slippers around the house on occasions so he knew his shoe size was much like hers. Of course his foot was slightly broader but all the same, he managed to squeeze them into the red heels. He stood up and chuckled as he wobbled uncertainly on the tall heel before clutching the handbag and stepping once more in front of the mirror. He bit his lip. He looked incredible!
Then he amended that thought. He looked incredible below the neck. Clearly the face and hair was that of a man, and come to think of it, the hands were too. Perhaps a little make up would change that, he thought and turned to where his mother had her make up bag and opened it up to reveal a confusing array of pallets and cylinders, applicators and brushes, potions and lotions that he had no idea how to use and where. He went for the basics and applied some dark red lipstick. Then remembering some TV show where a Drag Queen had talked about disguising cheek bones he added some colour to his cheeks and blended it in to try and disguise his facial structure, before adding a little mascara to his eyelashes and some colour on the brows to raise them a touch and make them look a little thinner.
At every adjustment, Robert had seen his face transform and he began to see that, with practice, he would make himself look more feminine so that he could show off the dress more convincingly. Finding some nail varnish, he slowly applied it to his rounded nails. They were the nails of a working man and he knew they would look far better shaped and extended but at least with the deep pink varnish on, his fingers were already looking more dainty.
Robert then sucked in a deep breath. His mother had a wig. She had been given it by the health board when her own fell out during a bout of chemotherapy but she had refused to wear it, choosing instead to wear a summer hat. Robert found it in its original box at the back of his mother’s wardrobe and was soon placing it on his head and adjusting it so that it looked reasonably realistic. The style was for the older lady and there were flecks of grey in a brunette bob which Robert knew didn’t really go with his face or the dress but even at that, the addition to his make up meant he now no longer saw Robert Mitchell in a dress but a rather attractive female who had the broadest smile on her face and an expression that indicated she had finally found something to like about herself.
Robert caught sight of the clock in the room. It was 1am. He had somehow spent the past 4 hours making himself look like a woman and he needed to stop and get to bed. One thing was for certain though, he would not be taking any boxes to the charity shop, or indeed anything from his mother’s bedroom, until he had sorted them out and decided which outfits he would like to keep because he could see himself spending more time displaying as an attractive young woman rather than the miserable male he had been.
It was 2.30pm before he had carefully removed his mother’s dress and hung it in her closet, along with some others from the boxes, then washed off the make up he had applied and removed the varnish that had spent barely an hour on his nails. It was deflating to see his former self reflecting in the bathroom mirror but at the same time he was excited by the knowledge that this was merely a version of himself and he could transform into something prettier, more desirable and much happier. He went to his bed feeling more positive than he could ever remember feeling.
Over the next two evenings Robert set about categorising his mother’s clothes. Underwear went mainly to the bin but there were some still packed and unworn that he kept, including a couple of bras that were purchased before the mastectomy. The prosthetic breasts were still in their box – a subtle B cup size since his mother was never the busty type – and there were unworn stockings and camisoles too.
Robert had gone on-line and ordered a long black wig which he felt would be more “Asian” in appearance and match the dress better. He marvelled at the websites that offered clothing in all shapes, sizes and colours and realised that he had access to whatever he wanted so long as he could afford it. The make up and perfume options were limitless and daunting but he found an on-line tutorial for transgender male to female make up suggestions and made notes on what tricks would help him look more feminine. All the time he realised that he was feeling an affiliation with the other sex far more than he had done so as a male. He saw that some websites would sell him oestrogen tablets so that he could boost that hormone level within him since his body wasn’t creating testosterone but decided he might discuss the matter with his doctor first. He couldn’t wait for the coming weekend when he could spend time en-femme and embrace his new projection of himself.
- - - - - - - - - - -
Robert rose early that first Saturday morning and breakfasted while planning out his day. He was going to get dressed and made up and if he felt confident enough, go out and take a bus into town and shop for a pair of denims to wear. He wanted some casual feminine clothes that his mother clearly lacked and was confident the body hugging cut of a female jean would still fit him. A nice floral trim would be pretty, and perhaps some joggers wouldn’t go amiss. He would go visit the very charity stores he would have donated to and see if they had some outfits that would suit him. He knew from overhearing the girls at work that these stores were an excellent way to get fashion for a bargain price.
He sat at the vanity in his mother’s old bedroom which he now considered his changing room and began his transformation. He did his make up first because he knew that this was the most important element and would take the longest time. Once he had that element complete, putting on the clothes was a2 minute job. Slowly and carefully he put on foundation and blusher, having learned from the internet how to hide facial hair – although he knew he really had minimal issues in that regard anyway. Then he lined the lips before applying lipstick to fill and a glaze to make it permanent and make it shine. Instantly his mouth became fuller and more sensuous in appearance and he smiled at his reflection.
He worked on his eyes, thankful that he had fair hair on his brows that could be easily disguised with a line of dark make up drawn across the top. His eyes became more prominent, appearing larger and giving his face a far softer appearance. He had spent some time the evening before shaping his nails with an emery board and had applied varnish last night so this morning he simply refreshed the nails that looked like they needed it. His feet looked fine with their own nails varnished now and he paused for a few moments while the nails dried, reminding himself of what remained to be done.
With his nails dry Robert took hold of the prosthetic breasts and the adhesive he needed to use to attach them to his chest. He was excited by the prospect of having breasts for the weekend and was particularly careful to have them correctly aligned. He then slipped on a bra and gasped as his prosthetics balanced in the cups and immediately looked like a part of him. He giggled slightly as the sight of his reflection. This was rapidly becoming someone else and that made Robert feel very happy.
From the closet, he pulled out the beautiful red silk dress and slid it on, noticing immediately how it hung over his new breasts. He shimmied a little as he pulled the dress over his hips and made sure it fitted correctly before pulling the zip on to secure it in place. Slipping his feet into the red shoes felt wonderful and left him with just one final enhancement – his new black wig which he had bought with next day delivery to ensure he had it for the weekend. He had brushed it when he first saw it and left it on the foam head that he bought with it and thought it looked fabulous. Carefully he placed it on his head and pulled it into place. There was a little fringe at the front and then long tresses that fell down below his shoulders which he brushed gently. As he did so he marvelled at the new person who now reflected in the mirror. This was a girl – a beautiful girl – whose eyes sparkled and whose smile shone and was a polar opposite of the drab and mundane male she had been before.
Robert got to his feet and walked over to the full length mirror and giggled. “Hi. I’m kind of new around here” he said from his reflection “My name’s Roberta but all my friends know me as Bobbi. I just love this dress, don’t you? Its so sweet and it feels so soft against my skin!” He pouted and held his head at an angle as he added “Um, could we maybe go out together sometime? Maybe take in a movie or a concert somewhere?” He was speaking in a higher pitch in a voice that sounded like the girls in his office when they chatted together, He chuckled at the thought of blending in with them and becoming part of their social group as Bobbi and finally “fitting in.”
Feeling excited at his transformation Robert walked through the house, getting accustomed to balancing on the high heels and shortening his stride in order to create the correct sway that made his walk more feminine. He switched on the radio and began to sing along with a Taylor Swift song, immersing himself in his new persona and wondering why he hadn’t cross dressed like this before. This felt right, this felt like the way he was meant to be. This felt wonderful!
The doorbell ringing came as a major shock. Robert had all the deliveries he was expecting and rarely received visitors at the door. He decided he would ignore this caller and let them go away. When the bell rang a second time he grew nervous so he went to the peep hole to see if it was one of the neighbours or someone from work. He gave a sigh of relief when he saw it was a total stranger - someone who wouldn’t know him and so in a moment of bravery he decided he would simply open the door and send the stranger on his way.
“Morning, can I help you?” he asked as he stood in the doorway gazing at the smart man in a business suit who was standing outside.
“Good morning! I was looking to speak with Robert Mitchell if he is at home?” the man asked.
“I’m afraid he’s not here at the moment. Can I get him to call you?” Robert said as he tried to send the caller on his way.
“Its regarding his late mother’s estate and I wouldn’t normally call on a weekend but it’s something we need to clear up in order to progress matters.” The man suddenly looked embarrassed and said “Sorry, I should have introduced myself, I’m Scott Parker. From Graeme Parker and Son Solicitors.” He thrust out a hand and added “and you are?”
Robert automatically took the hand offered to him but managed to keep his handshake limp and feminine in nature. “I’m . . . I’m Bobbi, Robert’s . . uh . . .cousin. . . .and I’m just visiting at the moment. He.. .um. . . had to go out to some work related thing this morning and I’m not sure when he’ll be back.”
Damn! This wasn’t any door to door salesman he could shut the door on and Robert knew he wanted his mothers affairs wrapped up as soon as possible so he would be the registered owner of the home he lived in and would have the contents of his mother’s savings accounts deposited into his own to ease his financial worries for a while.
Scott gave a little smile and said “Bobbi it would really take only a couple of minutes if I could come in and show you what’s needed and perhaps Robert could return the forms when he gets back. I’d really appreciate your help?”
There was something in the man’s smile and demeanour that made Robert pause for a split second. Scott used that to seal the deal. “I really appreciate your help, Bobbi” he said and smiled broadly and before he really thought the answer through he opened the door further and said “Well, I guess if it helps Robert and everything . . “
Scott stepped into the house. “Thanks Bobbi, this won’t take long.”
“Please” Robert said as he indicated a seat for Scott to sit on. He chose the sofa and as he thanked his hostess for the invitation, he opened up a satchel he was carrying containing the paperwork that was the reason for his call.
Robert sat in the armchair next to the sofa, careful to sweep his skirt under his backside and to sit with his legs to the side in order to appear as natural and demure as possible. He was nervous presenting as Bobbi for the first time to another person but at the same time he was excited to see how well he could carry the charade and especially when the visitor was so cute.
He caught himself. Did I just call my visitor cute, he thought and then smiled to himself. I guess he is kind of dishy! He took in the man who was searching inside his satchel. Five foot 10 or 11 probably, probably goes to a gym because he has a well toned body, kind of mousy brown hair that’s a little ruffled but in a nice way and a pair of brown come to bed eyes. . .wait did I just call those come to bed eyes? Focus on his shoes – ok, smart black shoes with not too much polish, grey socks, that’s better, and a nice grey suit with a bed tie on a white shirt . . .”
“Bobbi?”
“Em sorry?”
“I said do you live locally?”
“Em, well not so far. Maybe 10 miles or so away.”
Scott smiled. “You must be pretty close with your cousin then?”
“Oh yea” Robert replied. “We’re kind of the same age and grew up together and whatnot.”
“And both still single!” Scott said with a smile.
Robert’s face registered the shock at the statement and Scott quickly added “Only I notice you’re not wearing any rings. Sorry, I shouldn’t be so personal – I hope you’re not offended?
Robert allowed himself a smile as he replied “Oh no, its OK, I guess I just haven’t met Mr Right just yet. Scott’s eyes looked into Robert’s at that remark and the two looked at each other for a moment in silence before Robert glanced down at his hands which were folded together oh his lap,
“It’s a lovely house” Scott said, to change the subject.
“Thanks” Robert replied before realising his mistake. “I mean, Robert looks after it pretty well, he’s got a good eye for décor, always has!
Scott gave a little smile once more as he pulled out some forms. “Here we are, now it’s this section here that we need Robert to review and sign off.” His finger pointed to the bottom third of the form in front of him but he didn’t move it closer to where Robert could see it and instead he looked across and with his eyes seemed to draw Robert across to the sofa.
Robert was drawn by those eyes – those damned cute hazel brown eyes – and moved over to sit next to his visitor on the sofa. Scott smiled a little and took in the fragrance of the person next to him. Her delicate limbs and pretty face were so beguiling he was kind of glad it wasn’t Robert. Bobbi was far more charming company.
“I need Robert to confirm that his mother had no further savings accounts other than those already submitted and that there are no other shareholdings or pensions. He needs to read this section here and then sign off here and date here” Scott said as he slid a little closer to Robert in order to show the section in question. “Now there’s another form here” he added as he brought out a second document. “In this one we need Robert’s approval to close the existing bank accounts and savings accounts in his mother’s name so he needs to sign and date here and here.” He leaned forward pointing to the relevant section making Robert mirror the move until they were both just inches apart leaning over the piece of paper.
Scott turned and looked at Robert and their eyes met once more. “If you could possibly have Robert sign these for me I’d really appreciate it, Bobbi.” They held that position for a few seconds and Robert smiled as he replied “I’ll ask him as soon as he gets back. I’m sure he’ll drop them in to your office on Monday on his way to work” he said and then berated himself for saying something that a cousin wouldn’t know but when Scott didn’t react he decided he had gotten away with the faux pas.
“I‘m sorry, I forget my manners! Can I get you something to drink? Tea or coffee or something?” Robert asked, wanting to appear at ease with the situation. Scott smiled and said “Coffee would be great – no milk, two sweeteners if you have them?” Robert smiled “Yea, we have them. That’s what I take. Hang on I’ll just fix us a mug.”
Scott took stock of his surroundings. The house was neat and well looked after and retained a woman’s taste in décor despite Robert’s mother having passed several weeks before. He smiled as he saw a TV guide beside the television . His own mother bought that religiously week in week out.
Robert returned with the the mugs of coffee and a plate with a few biscuits to accompany. “Thanks!” said Scott. “ Are you by chance watching Dancing With The Stars this season?” He saw his hostess’s face light up. “Yea I am – did you see last Saturday’s show? Wasn’t Jamie Lynn Spears awesome? I mean I know she’s a celeb and has to have danced before but I thought she was just awesome!” gushed Robert.
Scott smiled. “Have you danced yourself, Bobbi?” Robert shook his head sadly. “What, not even at school dances and stuff?” Robert chuckled. “Well, I kind of got pulled around the floor by some dumb guys with two left feet but that doesn’t count. I kind of wish I had done ballet when I was little but you need your mom to put you down for that when you’re only 4 or 5 and I guess she could see my future didn’t lie in tutu’s and tights!”
Scott laughed. “Yea my folks were the same. Kept putting me down for Little League when I couldn’t hit a bull’s ass with a broom!” The pair laughed together, enjoying each other’s company. The continued making small talk as they finished their coffees. This coming together was rapidly having nothing to do with the official paperwork.
A couple of times Robert had snuck some extra looks at his visitor and was liking what he saw. He was a confident, attractive, professional young man that he could talk to easily and he found that he shared a similar taste in music – they had discussed the forthcoming music festival in town which featured acts Robert was also a great fan of.
“You know, Green Day isn’t usually the taste for young girls like you!” Scott had said and Robert had appeared mildly insulted at the comment. “My dad had a copy of American Idiot he wouldn’t stop playing and I guess it became the sound of my childhood and I kind of stuck with the band after that!” Scott smiled and nodded. “Favourite track?” Robert had smiled and said “I kind of like Whatsername and I know it’s the last track on the album and stuff but it kind of wraps up everything before it and leaves you wanting more and everything?”
Scott smiled. “Yea, I get you. I must have all their albums on CD somewhere” and Robert smiled and said “Oh, I’ve got them on vinyl in my room and started to point down the hallway. He immediately realised his mistake and added “back home” but was sure Scott had noticed.
Robert quickly decided he needed to end things before he made any further blunders, and saw that his guest had finished his coffee.. “Is that everything Mr Parker?” he asked.
“Call me Scott, please! Mr Parker is my father!” Scott said with a smile that made Robert feel strangely wonderful in a way he had never done before. “Yes, thanks Bobbi, you’ve been a great help” Scott said getting to his feet.
“It’s been nice meeting you, Scott” Robert said as he walked him to the door. Scott turned and faced him and replied “and you, Bobbi. You’ve been a great help this morning and I hope to see you again perhaps under less sad circumstances.”
They stood in the doorway looking at each other. Robert felt tingles throughout his body as his brain sent him messages he could barely suppress while Scott found himself taking in the complete woman before him that he felt drawn to in a most unprofessional manner.
“I’ll . . . I’ll have Robert phone you” Robert said as he opened the front door and Scott reached into his top pocket and produced a business card. “Here’s my number if he doesn’t already have it. My personal mobile phone is listed so I can be reached anytime” he added with a smile. He took one more look at his host and said “It’s been really lovely meeting you. Thanks again, Bobbi” and walked down the path to his car.
Robert closed the door and let out the deepest sigh he had ever made. So many emotions were racing through him at that moment. There was also the confidence that came from having entertained another man who thought he was a woman and so he decided while he felt that buzz it would be a good time to go shopping for those extra items he wanted to add to his wardrobe. It was time to go downtown.
(to be continued . . .)
Following his mother's death, Robert was embracing his true feminine identity more around the house - but following his meeting with Scott en-femme could he carry that forward into the outdoor world?
Chapter 2
Robert had found a beige sweater dress in his mother’s discarded clothes and decided it would be far more casual to wear to the shops than the red silk number he loved, so he changed into it and added a pair of brown ankle boots with a 2 inch heel and a brown shoulder bag and decided he looked good enough to pass muster. He emptied his wallet into one of his mother’s old purses and popped it into his shoulder bag along with a lipstick and compact and threw in his house keys as he pulled the front door closed and walked confidently down to the bus stop.
He was still pumped full of adrenaline from his meeting with Scott and once sat on the bus and clearly not drawing any unusual attention his thoughts went back to what had happened less than an hour before. He had felt something for another man. He hadn’t “pretended” in the way he was pretending to be female at the moment. Scott’s attentions had given him tingles all over his body – a body that hadn’t reacted that way before, a body that was so lacking in hormones that it never seemed to react to the expected stimuli.
But Scott’s eyes, Scott’s smile, Scott’s body . . .Robert glanced around himself nervously. He was getting dreamy eyed over another male in public while dressed as a woman ! This was so wrong – wasn’t it? Up until a week ago he would have declared it unthinkably wrong and yet events had created this opportunity and now he was sat on public transport with handbag, makeup and heels and even the bus driver had called him “dear” when he paid for his ticket. He appeared to have switched sides remarkably easily and wasn’t convinced he was ready for the change.
His stop came all too soon and he stepped down from the bus and headed into the shopping mall where he hoped he could merge with the crowd and become invisible. Within the first 2 minutes however that was to prove impossible. First a man saw him coming and immediately opened the door open for him, saying “There you are, my dear!” and while he was saying than you to the gentleman a male in his early 20s walked by and stared at him with a look on his face that was clearly lust and not disgust. His attention was so distracted that he duly walked into the glass doors of the Mall causing some shoppers to laugh and others to shake their heads at his obvious attraction to the opposite sex.
This was crazy, Robert thought to himself. He was a 30 year old man for goodness sake, although clearly his hip sway and small steps were projecting a different persona and it was clear her was unlikely to be “unveiled” by anyone which gave him more confidence as he saw his first target shop – Claire’s®
Scott’s comment about a lack of rings reminded Robert that a girl his age would be wearing such things and the items in this shop were cheap enough for him to treat himself. He found bangles that looked cute and a couple of necklaces that would enhance his neckline. Then he chose a couple of zirconium rings that looked really classy and had the sales assistant size his fingers so they fitted perfectly. It was while she was doing so he saw the sign – ear piercing available. He knew most girls had this done when really young and it would be strange that his were not pierced at his age. For a second he swithered but then thought guys get theirs done too don’t they? A few moments later he was choosing studs to go into his newly perforated earlobes.
All the time, the shop assistant was calling Robert “miss” and “dear” and with his slender hands, varnished nails and makeup he was clearly convincing at close quarters as well as from a distance. That pleased him greatly and bolstered his confidence level so there was more of a sway in his step as he emerged back into the mall and headed for the department store that was his next target.
It felt strange walking into the women’s wear section of the shop and browsing its stock but once more, his presence was not making any waves. Nobody was pointing at him, nobody screamed “He’s not a woman!” and no mothers needed to pull their child away from the freak in the dress. Instead he was free to check out pretty blouses and skirts, admire lacy underwear and crop tops that looked fun to try but would need a little more confidence than he currently had.
His target however was soon found and he gazed at the skin tight denims – skinny jeans that enhance your legs and make you look taller and slimmer. Every girl wants to wear them and Robert knew Bobbi needed to get herself some. He picked up a few examples in his size and made his way to the changing rooms. For a second he paused at the entrance which said “Ladies Changing” but the sales assistant nearby said “Its OK, dear, there’s a cubicle free!” and he headed on in and pulled the curtain behind him.
Robert smiled as he learned what every woman knows. Skinny jeans are the devil to get into! They demand the wearer to contort themselves and heave the material up their legs all in the name of fashion but after 5 minutes of extensive effort he had the slightly elevated waistline tied and his legs covered. Holding his sweater dress up so that he could see all the denims, he posed at the mirror and laughed. His legs looked amazing! He turned to each side and even glanced over his shoulder to check out his backside and mumbled “Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my goddess I’m beautiful!! As he twerked at the mirror. He put the ankle boots back on and they only added to the effect of elevating his legs to perfection. He had to own these!
5 minutes later he was standing at the pay desk with two pairs of skinny jeans – one blue and one black - some joggers in black and dark blue plus a pink blouse he had spotted on a sale rack and was drawn to it by its half cup sleeve and the glitter name “babe” written on its chest. He felt he was a total babe in those jeans and he couldn’t wait to get home and wear them with the new top.
“Oh – My – God!!”
The voice came from behind him in the queue and he recognised it immediately.
“Excuse me?” her voice called out and Robert turned around slowly to face Angela from his office. One of the loudest and liveliest of the girls in the team who lived on gossip and rumours.
He felt like a wounded gazelle on the Serengeti plains who was spotted by a pack of lions. All he could hope for was that they had already fed for the day.
Robert didn’t know what to say. Could he pretend to be a family member who just looked like him or should he say it was a dare to go out like this. Before he could make any excuse however, Angela let rip.
“Girl, that is just the sweetest blouse ever, did you take the last one or are there still some in my size somewhere?”
Robert exhaled. “It was on the sale rack over by the leggings – I think I saw a couple more on display though” he said and pointed his colleague to the racks in the distance.
“Thanks so much! Love that sweater dress by the way - really enhances your figure! God I wish I had a bod like you!” Angela said and she turned and headed for the sales stand.
Robert turned to find he was next in line so he handed over his purchases and used the contact free debit card from his purse to make payment. Moments later he was walking out of the shop with his carrier bag of clothes and the realisation that even his co-worker hadn’t spotted him. He knew the black wig would help of course but his eyes, nose and mouth were still the same. Perhaps the fact that he never got involved with the rest of the workforce meant they didn’t really remember his face. That fact, which would have disappointed him in the past, was now his saving grace. This gazelle would live another day. Robert then made a mental note not to watch so much David Attenborough documentaries.
He walked outside of the Mall and into the streets of the old town centre where the charity stores found cheaper rates and could afford their retail shops. Robert quickly found some more tops and a pair of dungarees which had a floral embroidered breast panel as well as highlights around the pockets. He was embarrassed to pay only £10 for what would have cost ten times that in the store he had just visited but he was grateful for the saving given that he was watching the pennies these days.
He realised that he had not eaten lunch and it was now past 2,30pm. He decided to grab something in town before he headed home so entered a small café next to the Mall and sat at a table near the window.
“Yes Miss, what can we get you?” the server asked and Robert smiled and ordered a cheese toastie and black coffee. While he waited for service he relaxed and thought back on how successful his trip into town had been. He had passed the test and been accepted as a woman by everyone and had bought items to enhance his collection of Bobbi clothing.
What’s more, he had enjoyed himself. Men shopped for what they needed and left. As Bobbi though, Robert had felt comfortable browsing in the department store and had he not done so he would have missed out on that cute blouse. He also had spotted some pretty underwear that he hoped he could come back for as his confidence grew and he might even buy some more earrings now that he had pierced his ears, He slid his hand through his hair to touch the little stud and reminded himself to keep rotating the stud for the next day or two to ensure the hole sealed independent of the stud. Maybe he should wear his hair back to show off his earrings more. He quite liked his natural hair colour but it would be months before it grew our enough to be able to go wig free. Perhaps he’d buy a blonde pixie cut example to give him another look? He had so many options now!
“There you are pet” the server said as he presented the toastie and coffee before Robert. He was about to take a chunk out of the hot cheese sandwich when he remembered who he was at that moment and instead cut a small chunk off and chewed it gently. The seat looked out of the window and he found himself people watching, identifying which outfits he felt would suit him and which didn’t. He was drawn to the shoes that the females were wearing and chuckled to himself. Only a matter of days from his first tentative steps at cross dressing, he was already critiquing natural women on their dress sense.
Robert smiled to see the lipstick rim on his coffee cup then realised that perhaps his makeup needed a touch up and a visit to the smallest room would be prudent before the bus journey home. An older lady, probably around his mother’s age, sat at the next table and he leaned across and said “Excuse me could you possibly keep an eye on those shopping bags for me for a moment while I nip into the ladies?” She smiled broadly “Of course dear – take your time!” Robert walked confidently through the coffee shop and through the door marked 'Ladies' without a pause, displaying his new found confidence.
Of course the ladies toilets were a new experience for Robert but he knew enough to expect what he found – a row of cubicles and a large mirror with seating where one could repair their makeup. He decided to head for the cubicles first so that he was not caught short later. He slipped into the first available and hoisted up his sweater dress so that he could pull down his panties and sit down. He was aware that someone else was in the stall next to his and so he tried to mimic the sound he could hear to avoid detection once completed he automatically took some toilet paper as though to wipe since this was the accepted norm. He even wiped front to back as is the protocol before letting the paper drop into the bowl. He then got up, pulled up his panties and pulled down his dress before flushing the toilet. Phase one completed successfully.
When he emerged from the cubicle there were two females sitting at the mirror and Robert noticed that there had only been two seats so he was left to stand. “I’m almost done, dear. Won’t be a moment” the older of the pair said as she applied some fresh mascara before popping it into her handbag. “Can I just say how pretty you look in that dress, dear?” she added. “Such a timeless look and so smart!.” Robert smiled and said “Thank you! I love your jacket . . . Oh lord almighty what am I like!” The woman seemed shocked and Robert quickly apologised. “I’m sorry only I came out shopping 3 hours ago to buy myself a jacket and forgot all about it! I got some trousers, leggings, blouse and tops instead!”
The lady laughed “That’s perfectly normal for us females isn’t it? Once we get in a shop all plans go out the window and we end up buying things we never really needed just because they look lovely! At least you remembered before you got home and had to come back out again tomorrow!” The younger girl sitting next to her said “I was in McDonnell’s on the 2nd floor earlier and they had some lovely jackets with 30% discount. You might want to check them out before you start searching?” “Thank you! I will!” Robert said as he took the chair being vacated by the older lady.
Robert checked his face. To be fair, it looked fine. Nothing appeared smudged or marked so he simply added a light powdering as he had been shown on a YouTube tutorial and then reapplied his lipstick, using a tissue and a hint of powder to help make the colour set and last longer. If he was going back into the Mall shopping he may be late home.
The girl at the mirror was talking to Robert all the time he was doing his face, talking about what she had bought that afternoon and what some social media guru had said about an unknown brand of cosmetics and Robert feigned interest as he popped his lipstick back in his handbag. “Oh and you MUST get your boyfriend to take you to see the new Bond film in the cinema! I’m not usually into action movies but the baddie in the film is so hot you kind of want to cheer him on instead!” Robert laughed and was about to say he was still single but instead said “I’ll remember that! Might score some brownie points by suggesting we go to an action movie. Always good to keep them happy, especially when you’ve just been out shopping !!”
They emerged together from the toilet and returned to their respective tables. Robert thanked the lady who had been watching his shopping and asked the server for his bill. He had the cash in his purse and so paid that way, leaving a little something for the server. He liked the coffee shop and wanted to come back.
He decided to check the charity shop he had visited earlier for a jacket. He had forgotten to look for one there and they seemed to have nice clothes He was rewarded when he went in and immediately found a black collared jacket that could be worn formal or casual and it was stupid cheap like the majority of items in the shop. Feeling happy with his purchase Robert decided he would walk back through the Mall to see what the jackets in McDougall’s were like and how much he had saved by not shopping there.
When he entered the shop however, he saw the styles were very different from the charity shop. These jackets were trendy and cool and his eyes were drawn to a black faux leather example with no collar, zip fastening and pockets. He knew it would look perfect with his black skinny jeans in the shopping bag. He was only 30 and no old maid. He could carry this look off. There was indeed 30% off taking the price of the jacket down to £80.99. It was more expensive than everything else he had bought combined but he knew he must have it.
As he walked back to the bus stop with all his shopping bags he realised he had bought more clothing in that one afternoon than he had done in the past 8 years or so. Somehow buying for Bobbi was way more fun than for himself. He could barely contain his excitement on the journey home and couldn’t wait to empty the bags and try on his new purchases.
It was after 7pm before he had exhausted himself on the manikin parade associated with the purchases he had made and the different looks he could create with his existing clothes and the latest additions. Eventually he slipped into a pair of leggings and an oversized t-shirt and padded into the kitchen to see what he could prepare for his evening meal. If he was going to wear those skinny jeans regularly he would need to ensure he didn’t put on more weight so he chose a chicken fillet with rice and a glass of water. He wanted to maintain his looks and decided that would involve taking his calorie intake seriously.
Sitting on the sofa later on while some game show played on the television, Robert’s mind went back to when he had sat there alongside Scott and he leaned into the sofa and sniffed to see if he could find any trace of his visitor’s cologne but without success. He drew his legs up onto the sofa and curled up hugging a cushion. Scott had left a real impression on him and he wondered if Scott was sitting thinking about Bobbi. He noticed the business card lying on the coffee table and picked it up. It read Scott Parker LLB (Hons) Partner, Graeme Parker & Son Solicitors with his business address and contact telephone. On the reverse it read personal e-mail [email protected] and his mobile phone number.
Robert looked at it for a few moments remembering the tall, athletic man with the boyish hair, glistening hazel eyes and the ever present smile on his lips and he wondered what it would feel like to be kissed by those lips. He drew the card to his mouth and kissed it, imagining it was Scott himself. leaving a perfect impression of his own lipstick on the card. He sighed and squeezed the cushion that little bit tighter.
Not wanting the trouble of removing the make up stains from his bedding, he washed his face thoroughly and remembered to disinfect his new piercings before going to bed. He looked at the drab décor that he had disregarded for so many years and decided that he would redecorate in the coming weeks to give the room a brighter, lighter, softer feel. Maybe even refresh some of the furnishings and certainly the bedding. It would cost a bit but it would be worth it and make things more align to Bobbi and her more positive persona. Robert was going to be restricted to working hours only. Outwith those times, there would be a girl living at this address. The thought sent him off into a comfortable night’s sleep.
- - - - - - - - - -
On Sunday morning Robert rose feeling wonderfully relaxed. Saturday had been a wonderful day with so many positives and he was going to enjoy Sunday as Bobbi. He squeezed into a pair of skinny jeans and put on a gypsy blouse he had found in the charity shop and paid £2 for. It was white with a floral display across the chest, three quarter sleeve and a slightly ribbed effect around the shoulders. It felt very feminine.
After breakfast he turned up the music on one of the pop stations and set about cleaning the house. He had to admit he hadn’t been attending to the cleaning so much in his mothers final months and when she was taken into the hospice and wasn’t around to nag him about it he had stopped altogether. Now it was time to make amends. He began by dusting all the surfaces and polishing the woodwork. Washing window blinds followed and then the vacuuming of the carpets and upholstery as well as the curtains meant that by lunchtime the lounge was looking – and smelling fresher than it had for some time.
Robert ate a bowl of muesli mixed in with a natural yoghurt and a piece of fresh fruit as his lunch washed down with a black coffee, The bathroom and kitchen would be next for the cleaning regime, all the time accompanied by him singing along to Shania Twain, or Ariana Grande which somehow Robert seemed to know through osmosis from background television or radio he had been exposed to. Now as Bobbi, it was the music of his life and it resonated with him.
By the time he had finished the deep cleaning of his kitchen it was time for Robert to prepare his evening meal. He had a fish fillet in the freezer that he knew he needed to eat before it went off so he took it out to defrost and prepared a baked potato and some green beans to accompany it. The idea of a smarter diet really excited him and he was now motivated towards something that he should have been doing years before.. The Bobbi effect was going to be good on so many levels.
After dinner, Robert sat down with his computer and read up on how to make a male haircut look more feminine. He had gone without a wig today, as much to allow him to admire his new ear piercing as anything, but he knew that his current hair style was not feminine enough and he wanted options. All the websites however said to simply let your existing hair grow out over 6 months to a year and so he knew he was going to have to wear a wig for a while yet.
He decided to research some low cost female clothing websites so that he could increase his options without incurring crippling bills and there seemed to be several low cost options open to him. He knew the quality would be lower as a result but he considered most would only be worn in the privacy of his home. He book marked the sites and moved on to make up. His mother’s stash was fine for the short term but he needed to know what his own skin tone was and what make up would best accentuate and enhance. There was an advert on line for free assessments sponsored by a well known make up brand, to be undertaken in the large department store in town, by appointment only. He decided he would book a time for the following weekend and attend as Bobbi and hope that they would not see through the deception.
Finally Robert checked out a shoes website and marvelled at the range of styles and colours available in all sizes. He was a ladies size 7 shoe which was considered reasonably large but still within the mainstream meaning there were thousands of styles to choose from, many with a wider fitting which would make it more comfortable for him to wear. His mind was filled with the options available to him and he wished he had more disposable income to allow him to feed on the opportunities being a woman would bring but for now he could simply imagine what could be and that was enough.
Eventually his cleaning work made him weary and ready for bed. He showered and washed his make up off, then removed his finger nail varnish before applying a little skin moisturiser and slipping into a nightdress he had acquired from his mother’s stock and slid into bed. Being Bobbi was wonderful, he thought as he switched off the bedside lamp and fell fast asleep.
Nobody likes Monday’s and Robert was particularly unhappy to see this one. He needed to go to work as Robert in his boring old grey trousers, white shirt and grey tie with matching black shoes. His life as a male was decidedly monochrome when compared to his alter ego. He wanted to be Bobbi but knew she would have to wait until he got home after 5pm. He poured himself a bowl of bran flakes and made a cup of coffee and took them through to the living room so he could watch the breakfast news before heading for the office.
That was when he spotted the lipstick stained business card on the coffee table. Damn! He had those forms to sign and return to Scott’s office today! He quickly found the paperwork and the areas where he needed to leave his signature. For a second he wanted to sign Bobbi Mitchell and replace the “o” with a heart but he reminded himself that these were legal documents and Bobbi Mitchell did not actually exist in the eyes of the law so if he wanted to see his mother’s legacy come into his bank account he needed to sign Robert Mitchell like he usually did and add today’s date – May 29th – to keep things moving in the right direction. He carefully folded the forms and placed them inside his bag he took to work each day. Who knows, maybe he’d get to see Scott in the office when he popped in. The thought sent a wave of pleasure through Robert’s body until he noted the time and realised he needed to finish breakfast and get on his way. Being late would only make his boss more aggressive towards him and make his day that little bit worse.
_ _ _ _ _ _
Robert’s morning went as boringly as it always did. Mundane workload,, lack of stimulus and minimal colleague interaction. That was until he went to the kitchen to make himself a coffee and in walked Angela, the office loudmouth. She stood for a moment and looked at him with quizzical eyes and he was certain she was connecting the dots and recognising him as the girl she had seen in the Mall on Saturday. He was about to say something in explanation when she said “You’ve pierced your ears.” “Yes” he replied “been meaning to for years so just went for it at the weekend.” She went over to the kettle and poured herself a mug of tea and said “Never thought you were the trendy type. Goes to show, its always the quiet ones” and with that she left the room. Robert smiled to himself and turned the studs as he whispered under his breath “If only you knew!”.
When lunchtime came he went for a walk down into the town centre and to the offices of Graeme Parker & Son Solicitors. A reception desk sat remote from the rest of the office so when he handed over the paperwork and said it was for Scott Parker the girl just said she would make sure he got it and bid him good day. Robert turned and left, disappointed he hadn’t glanced him in his workplace. The rest of his mother’s estate paperwork might be dealt with by post and they would never meet again.
He turned and walked back down the street past a coffee shop and as he did he caught a glimpse of Scott sat at a table near the window, eating alone. He stood for a second to be sure it was Scott and then realised he was conspicuous standing in the road so he walked closer to the window as though he were reading the menu and deciding whether or not to go inside. He managed a couple of quick looks and felt his body tingle with excitement. This was madness. Another man should not excite him so much. Besides which, he had lingered too long at the window already, so he walked away and headed back towards his office.
Inside the coffee shop, Scott smiled. He had noticed the man from his peripheral vision and knew he had just stepped out of his office. There was enough resemblance in the height and facial features for him to be sure that he had seen Bobbi Mitchell in her male form. He knew he wanted to get to know Bobbi better and was ready to make the next move.
The rest of the working day went by slowly for Robert but when 5pm arrived he was quick to leave his desk behind and make his way home. He rushed through the door and immediately stripped off his workwear and slipped into a floral summer dress he had found in his mother’s collection and a pair of white sandals. He placed the new blonde bob wig on his head and applied some light make up and a splash of perfume. When he examined himself in the mirror he smiled broadly. He was pretty again, a young woman without a care in the world.
He began singing “I feel pretty, oh so pretty – I feel pretty and witty and bright – and I pity any girl isn’t me tonight!” and danced out into the hall heading towards the kitchen. As he did, the telephone rang. He checked to see who was calling but the display simply red “unknown caller” so he siged. It would be another unsolicited sales call, he thought so he lifted the received and said “Hello. We are not interested in whatever you are selling so please take us off your database. Thank you.” He has about to drop the receiver when a voice said “Bobbi? Bobbi is that you? Its Scott – Scott Parker – hello?”
Robert’s heart skipped a beat and he quickly answered back. “Oh Scott – Hi - em sorry, I thought you were selling me something. How are you?” then he cringed. That sounded too friendly a question to someone you only know on business terms. Before he could correct himself though Scott replied “I’m great thanks. I was calling to thank Robert for dropping in the paperwork today, is he around?”
Robert shook his head unnecessarily as he said “Em – no, he’s not I’m afraid he’s . . . working late at the office this evening, but I’ll pass on your message when he does come in. Was there anything else?” Again he cringed. That sounded like he wanted to hang up on Scott when the truth was very much the opposite.
Scott cleared his throat. “There is actually, Bobbi, em, I’ve got a couple of tickets to a special screening of the new Bond movie at the Odeon for tomorrow night because we do a lot of their legal work and I just wondered if you would like to go see the film . . . with me .. . .assuming you’re still around of course and not heading back home before then or whatever?”
Robert stared at the wall in a state of shock. He was being asked out on a date by another man – a handsome young man who made him tingle inside and who was a successful businessman in the town. The shock and scandal that would result from his exposure as a man pretending to be a woman would rock the town at its core and make him a laughing stock!
“Hello? Hello are you still there Bobbi?” the voice on the line said.
“Em . . em sorry, yes, I’m still here” he managed to blurt out.
“if you’re free I can pick you up around 6 – its an early showing so maybe we can grab a bite to eat after the film and have you back by 10:30 - 11pm if that was alright?
Robert’s mind was in turmoil, He would need to leave work early in order to be ready for his date at 6 – wait, was he even thinking about accepting?!!
“Bobbi? Can you hear me?”
“Em . . yes, sorry Scott I was not expecting this offer, its very kind of you but . . “
“Bobbi, when I met you on Saturday I found you a very interesting and attractive young lady and I would love to spend a little more time with you to get to know you better. I’m told this is one of the best Bond films to date and I know the other performances are sold out this week. I’d hate to sit alone in the theatre. You’d do me a great favour by accompanying me, what do you say?”
Robert could almost hear Scott’s smile down the phone. His body was trembling with excitement and every nerve in his body was screaming yes to his brain. His brain wanted to say no but the rest of his being overrided it. “I’d love that Scott, thank you so much” he heard himself say and then Scott reply “Marvellous! I’ll pick you up at 6pm then!”
Robert interrupted his date “Wait! What should I wear?” he almost shouted and then regretted it immediately.
Scott gave a little chuckle as he responded “It’s not a formal event, Bobbi, I’ll probably be in denims if that helps, but you do look cute in that red dress you wore on Saturday! OK, take care and I’ll see you 6pm tomorrow night.”
Robert responded “OK, Thanks again, Scott, goodnight!” and heard Scott say “goodnight” back before the line went dead.
( concludes in Chapter 3 . . . coming shortly ! )
Robert has been asked out on a date as Bobbi. Can his feminine side make the evening a success or is he doomed to exposure and ridicule?
Chapter 3
Robert stood in the hallway for the next 5 minutes absorbing what had just happened. Then he went into the kitchen and stood there for another 5 minutes considering what he should do next. His appetite was gone so he simply grabbed a granola bar from the cupboard and began chewing on it. He walked into the living room and sat on the sofa, his legs tucked beneath himself.
He was playing Russian Roulette. He was going out on a date with a solicitor dressed as a female and pretending to be a cousin of one of his date’s customers. He was attracted to him and it seemed Scott was attracted to Bobbi but Bobbi wasn’t real and when Scott found that out he would be furious and ashamed. His career could be over as his standing in the town would be hugely damaged by the revelation he was out on the town canoodling with another man. He would be canoodling wouldn’t he? I mean he wouldn’t just sit and watch the film however good it was. He wanted to get to know Bobbi so surely there would be some kissing and cuddling?
Robert stopped in his tracks. “Do I want to be kissed and cuddled by Scott?” he asked himself, and a surge of tingling excitement gave him his answer. He giggled and gnawed at his lower lip. Maybe nobody will see us in the dark theatre, he’ll decide I’m not that interesting and it will just be a one time thing. He’ll go back to his work, I’ll go back to mine and he’ll forget he ever met me. I get to see the movie for free, and I get something to eat and a lift back home. No biggie, right?
He looked at the business card on the coffee table and gave it another layer of lipstick.
Then he leapt off the sofa and went through to his changing room and spent the next 2 hours trying to decide the right outfit to wear on Bobbi’s first date. He decided he would phone into the office and take the whole day off, saying something had come up that he needed to attend to. Bobbi’s first date was something that needed a whole lot of preparation for if it was to be anything other than a disaster.
His stomach churned with nerves and excitement and possibly a little hunger too so Robert made a slice of toast and a mug of tea and sat watching a Friends rerun on TV for a while before deciding he needed a good night’s sleep before the big day and got ready for bed. A thousand questions ran through his brain as he lay beneath the sheets and he constantly debated whether this was a good idea or not but whenever he did he saw Scott’s smiling face with those dreamy brown eyes and he felt that sensation that told him it was the right thing to do.
He fell asleep and dreamt of Scott Parker, Solicitor at Law.
- - - - - - - -
When Robert woke the next morning he was feeling excited. He had slept soundly with a dream of Scott’s arms around his waist and their lips entwined and it had felt wonderful. He knew he had one task to undertake before he could relax and enjoy the day so he got up and went to the telephone to call his boss’s phone number. As it was only 7.30am the call went to her voicemail and Robert left the message he had prepared. “Something personal has cropped up that I need to deal with today so I am taking a day off from my annual leave account. My workload is pretty much up to date so anything that I’m needed for today can wait until tomorrow when I should be in as usual.”
He hung up the phone and sighed. They were allowed a “personal reasons” short notice leave day each year so he knew he could invoke one without too many questions being asked. Now his day was free for him to enjoy and he intended to do just that. Still wearing his nightdress, he padded through to the kitchen and prepared his breakfast. He kept it simple and healthy – grapefruit segments, a bowl of muesli with semi skimmed milk and a mug of black coffee which he enjoyed while watching breakfast television
There was a story about how females were presented in most Hollywood films and how they were usually there simply for their looks and for the use of the leading male. As Robert watched the broadcast he became angrier and angrier. Females had stories to tell just as much as men – often more so because they were mothers and had brought children into the world and raised them with far less input from the male in the family unit. In his Bobbi accent he shouted at the television “We deserve better! We want our voices heard! We want a Jane Bond movie next time!” He got up from the sofa with his empty breakfast dishes and huffed. “Men! They think the own us!” he said to nobody in particular.
It was now 9am – he had watched TV longer than he intended – so he went to the bathroom to draw a hot bath, and poured in some moisturiser and bath oils with a gentle jasmine fragrance. After getting tensed up at the inequalities of the film industry he was ready to soak and relax and let his skin enjoy the pampering. During the bath he washed his hair but he had already decided he would be covering it up with a wig this evening.
Drying himself off after a relaxing soak, Robert slipped into a pair of leggings and a t-shirt and set about his next treatment. He shaped his nails with an emery board so that they were presentable and then renewed the varnish on his toes and finger nails before sitting down in the living room to give them time to dry fully.
He had made peace with the idea of dating Scott later that evening. He had decided he would go along and enjoy the film – although now he would be paying special attention to the female actors and what their roles were. They would be going for something to eat after which was always nice and they could chat together and enjoy each other’s company. If Scott wanted more than that and made any moves towards kissing and such, he would tell him that Bobbi was actually Robert’s way of investigating his feminine side and he was sorry if he had deceived him. He expected Scott would back off and no harm would be done. They would part never to meet each other socially again. That way Scott could claim an honest mistake should anyone say they saw him with another man. If anyone at his work referred to Robert about the incident he would claim he knew nothing about it and the matter would soon be forgotten. Nobody at his work really bothered about him one way or the other anyway.
Lunch was an apple and a mug of coffee. He wanted to be hungry when it came to the night’s meal. There was nothing worse that being taken for food and having so little appetite you leave most of it – so rude! Besides which, his stomach was already in knots as he started to think about spending the evening with Scott, smelling his cologne and gazing into those delicious brown eyes, maybe running his fingers through Scott’s hair, and kissing his lips . . . . wait a moment, he reminded himself, this is another man and when he finds out I am male also there is no way I’ll be kissing or running fingers anywhere near him! This is just a one time, 'sorry for the misunderstanding and back to the usual tomorrow' affair.
The thought made him a little unhappy. Going back to work tomorrow and knowing there was nobody special in his life was depressing but at least he had Bobbi to come home to and maybe he would get confident enough to visit the local LGBTQ bar and nightclub in time and open himself up to that community. He might find acceptance and affection there once he fully committed to a transgender lifestyle.
Around 2pm Robert began working on his make up. He knew tonight was special so he wanted to take extra time and extra care. After he had shaved his face as close as possible, including the majority of his eyebrows, and given his face a general coating of foundation he started drawing his brows in , using the top of his old brow as a guide to keep them balanced. Then he blended some rouge up his cheek bones towards his eyes in order to drag people’s vision up to his prettiest feature. He carefully added some eye make–up to enhance their impact and then a generous helping of mascara to give the lashes some strength.
He knew it was a little early to be wearing full earrings but he was desperate to have an opportunity to wear them in public so he carefully removed his studs that had been inserted on the Saturday before and replaced them with a pair that his mother had loved. They were a simple silver drop chain attached to a little daisy made up of tiny white and yellow stones to form the flower. Attaching them to his ears he gazed at them in the mirror and instantly saw why his mother had been so fond of them. “A little bit of you will be with your daughter tonight on her first date, Mummy” he said to the mirror and quickly looked away as he felt his emotions threaten to wash away the good work he had already done.
He moved on to his mouth, outlining his lips with a pencil before filling them with a dark burgundy lipstick that made them extremely prominent but at the same time in perfect balance with the rest of his make up for the evening. He bit on a piece of tissue paper and then lightly dusted with powder before reapplying the makeup so that his lipstick might survive most of the evening without rubbing off. He smiled at his reflection. It was looking good so far and that mattered a great deal to him.
He carefully removed the t-shirt he had been wearing and picked up the prosthetic breasts he had worn for the weekend. They were carefully reattached to his chest, the location confirmed by the black lacy bra he had selected for the evening so that the fit looked natural and alluring. Then came the blouse top. It was a black, v neck example that would show a little cleavage. With a cap sleeve and a crop bottom it allowed the display of a bit of flesh but Robert knew it made him look slim and girly and that was what he needed.
Robert added the black skinny jeans he had bought on Saturday and finished with a pair of black open toed sandals with a 3 inch heel that would make his legs look longer and, importantly, raise him closer to Scott’s height. Yes he would still be around 3 inches shorter than his date but that was so much better than 6 inches where people could think Scott was taking his little sister out rather than a girlfriend.
Now came the finishing item, that blonde bob wig he had acquired on the internet. Robert took time to tuck his own hair under the wig cap and then secure the wig with a hidden pin once he was sure he had it in the correct angle. A soft brush and then a quick curl of the tips with a heated wand and he was done. He gazed at his reflection in the full length mirror and nodded. There was something of Olivia Newton John’s “Sandy” from Grease in his look but he knew that she was considered beautiful that way and he only hoped he would be thought of the same way,
He transferred the contents of his brown shoulder bag from the weekend to a black glossy clutch bag and gave a deep sigh. He was pretty much ready to meet his date. He glanced at the clock for the time and let out a squeal. It was ten minutes to 6 already? How was that possible! Scott would be outside waiting for him in no time! There must be something he needed to do, he thought, but in reality there wasn’t. That didn’t stop him going from room to room checking everything that should be turned off was and that everything was secure. He had brushed his teeth after lunch and popped a tic-tac into his mouth in order to freshen it further. His heart rate increased and his nerves began to jangle. This was it. He was about to go on a date with a handsome man who set his heart a flutter.
He was still patrolling the house when the doorbell rang and he squealed in shock. He tried to regulate his breathing and then opened it. The pair of them looked at each other for a few seconds without speaking then Robert said “Oh I’m sorry, Scott, where are my manners, please come on in!”
Scott took another second before replying “Thank you and stepping into the hallway. Then he shook his head. “Bobbi you look absolutely incredible tonight. I mean, you look . . . beautiful, and you’ve changed your hair?!”
Robert blushed at the complements being lavished on him and swayed a little from side to side with his head tilted and a smile on his face. “Thank you, I hoped you would like it.” Scott was continuing to admire his date from head to toe and said “Please, would you let me take a photo of you“ and he pulled out his phone. Robert tried to pose as best he could and smile confidently as Scott shot a couple of images for his phone and shook his head. “They don’t do you justice, Bobbi, but I will cherish them.”
Robert reached into his handbag and said “OK then, can I take one of you?” to which Scott said, how about one of “us”? and he came over and wrapped his arm around his shoulders. Robert giggled as he held the phone out as far as he could. There on the screen were the two head and shoulders smiling happily and Robert could see the love etched on Scott’s face. He took the photo and said “Thank you so much, I’ll keep that special!”
Scott gave his shoulder a squeeze and said “OK, if you’re ready, Madam, your chariot awaits!” Robert giggled and said “Why thank you, kind sir!” and he took the hand Scott offered and walked out of the door, pulling it it closed behind him. Walking down the path hand in hand with Scott felt incredible and he could have skipped with joy down to the kerbside. He gazed at the car and said “Is this yours Scott?” Scott laughed “Yes it is, being a Solicitor pays well and the company gives me an allowance because of work use. Here, let me help you climb in!”
It wasn’t a huge climb into the passenger seat of the SUV but Robert appreciated the gesture. Such chivalry was rare these days. He was strapped in before Scott had gotten into the drivers seat and started the engine. “I don’t know how well you know the town” he said “but the cinema is just a couple of blocks away.” Robert smiled. Of course he knew where it was but Bobbi was meant to be from out of town so he played the ignorant and simply said “that’s great!”
Within a matter of seconds Robert’s senses were fizzing as the car was filled with the smell of Scott’s cologne. He drew deep intakes of air and luxuriated in the aroma before saying “What’s that fragrance you wear, Scott?” He glanced over and said “Sauvage, by Dior. You like it?” Robert gave a little smile and said “Its so . . masculine . . but it doesn’t overpower.” Then he added “I find it very attractive” and then realised what he had said and gasped at his naivety. Scott just smiled and said “In my line of work, I need to smell nice and I find this works well for me.”
Then he glanced at his date and said “When did you get your hair done?” Robert replied “Friday” which was when it arrived in the mail so he WAS being honest. to a degree. Scott smiled and added “It works so well for you – I mean you looked great when your hair was long and black and everything but the pixi cut makes you look . . I don’t know . . more playful? Happier? Younger? Sorry, I’m babbling now so let’s just say I like it and leave it there!”
Robert giggled and said “OK, that’s a deal – but for the record I like the complements and will take all three options!” They both chuckled and Scott said “OK, here we are, The Odeon Multiplex. It’s a pretty popular spot at weekends but a Tuesday is a quieter night so we should get parked near the door all being well.”
He pulled into a slot and switched off the engine, and turned to Robert. “I can’t tell you how happy I am having you join me this evening. When I met you on Saturday I felt something click inside me as though I knew you and I would have a lot in common and I’ve never felt that way before with an attractive woman.” Robert gave a coy smile as Scott continued “I want to thank you so much for coming here with me tonight. I can’t wait to get to know you better!”
Robert smiled “Me too, Scott, and thank you for asking me!” Scott said “Let me help you out of the car” and got out of his side and ran round to open Robert’s door for him and give him a hand to hold as he slid out of his seat and onto the pavement. Scott kept hold of his date’s hand and said “Come on, lets go check in!”
Robert’s heart thumped in his chest. Now he was hand in hand with another man in a public place and very visibly on a date. It felt incredible but what if he was recognised, what if a co-worker was going to the same film tonight and saw him in skinny jeans and three inch heels? Make up was his only mask but he had to rely on it to keep him incognito.
Scott kept hold of Robert when they reached the ticket booth, using his other hand to pull out the letter confirming their seats for the performance and when the clerk issued them he thanked them and thrust the tickets in his pocket. “Would you like snacks – we can split a popcorn bucket or something?” Scott said and Robert smiled and said “I’m OK – you have some if you want?” He laughed and said “Oh I know that trick – I get popcorn and then you end up stealing great handfuls of it all evening!!” The two of them laughed.
“The film starts in 10 minutes so I guess we should just head for the seats. I think I know where we are going.” Robert smiled and nodded and once again was hand in hand with Scott. Each time felt better than the last and a lot more natural. He was slipping into the girlfriend role with ease and loved the feeling of being at Scott’s side as his partner. He let Scott lead the way through the main door and then around to the left.
They walked for a few yards before coming to another door and once they were through that there were a few stairs to climb. Robert thought it strange because the cinema didn’t have a balcony that he knew of but he trusted Scott and made no comment. A few yards on, there was another door with a letter and two numbers on it and Scott opened it up. “Here we are!” he said and ushered Robert in.
“Well, Bobbi? What do you think?” Scott asked. Robert gazed around him and giggled. “Oh my god, Scott, you’ve got a private box for us? And with a loveseat too !” It was indeed a box some 20ft above the main auditorium, facing the main screen and containing a two cushioned settee on a raised dais so that you could still watch the full screen from a relaxed position. Scott laughed “Now you know why I wanted you to join me tonight. Can you imagine me sitting here all alone – feet up on the sofa with my box of popcorn?” Robert giggled and shook his head. “I have never been in such a cool place to watch a film!” he gushed and Scott replied “I’ve never been with such a beautiful girl to watch a film.”
He looked deep into Robert’s eyes and Robert into Scott’s and as if drawn by magnets they closed the space between each other and kissed.
Realising they might still be visible from below, they managed to sit on the loveseat while remaining interlocked at the mouth and Robert felt Scott’s arms around him, holding him to his chest. Robert had never known such ecstasy and allowed his hand to rest on Scott’s inner thigh. Scott in turn had a hand on Robert’s and the effect was that both parties were delighting in their union.
Without thinking, Robert’s hand slid further up Scott’s leg and used his thumb to caress his bulging member which was throbbing in his pants. Scott’s eyes went wide as he moaned, their lips still locked, and he thrust his tongue into Robert’s mouth and just at that moment the house lights went down and the curtains opened indicating that the evening’s entertainment was about to commence.
Robert withdrew his hand and Scott did the same as they parted lips and just smiled at each other. “Oh Bobbi, I never believed in love at first sight until I met you. You’re the most incredible woman in the world and I’m honoured to be sitting here with you!” Scott said as he caressed his date’s face.
Robert’s emotions were all over the place. He had totally fallen in love with Scott and wanted to kiss him for the rest of the night but at the same time he knew he needed to be honest with him before they got in too deep and the hurt would be more deeply felt. “Oh Scott, I love you too but. . “ he began to say as Scott placed his finger on Robert’s lips. “Sssshhhhh. We can talk later. Let’s watch the film together and we can chat later over some food? We have all night together and this is just the beginning” he said as he leaned in for another kiss.
The Bond film was about to begin so the pair of them got comfortable. Scott sat with his arm around Robert who had his legs up on the rest of the loveseat and was snuggled into Scott’s shoulder. Scott smiled contentedly and let his fingers caress Bobbi’s arm. Robert knew there could be fireworks ahead but for the next 2 hours he was in paradise and was savouring everything about the experience.
As with all Bond movies there were periods of dialogue where you needed to concentrate on the plot and periods of action drama where Robert found himself clutching Scott in excitement and fear, each time eliciting a little comforting kiss on the forehead or lips. It was at least a third of the way through the film before Robert remembered he wanted to check how females were being portrayed and he tried to remember. Yes, Judy Dench was playing a senior part and yes there were other agents in MI6 who were female but Bond was still a red blooded male and the main fight schemes and stunts to date were all male driven. He wanted to feel outraged by this but instead decided he was enjoying Scott’s attentions more and would simply concentrate on that instead.
The film came to its climax and ended and Robert looked into Scott’s eyes - those brown, sensual eyes of his - and without saying anything he kissed him, long and passionately as though unleashing pent up feelings that had boiled inside him like lava seeking a fissure in the earth. When he eventually stopped Scott smiled and said “and what did I do to deserve that – not that I’m complaining!” Robert shook his head. “Its for being such a wonderful man and for inviting me out tonight and giving me the best night out I could ever dream of, but there’s something I need to tell you and I am scared of how you’ll react and I . . . I’m so sorry Scott !”
A tear ran down Robert’s face which Scott reached for and gently brushed away.
“It’s alright Bobbi, I know. I knew before I had even met you. But I fell in love with you and I’m still in love with you so it changes nothing for me because I’ve known from the very start so don’t cry darling. I love you” Scott said and kissed Robert gently before adding “Come on, I have a quiet table booked for 9pm where we can talk.” Robert’s face was etched with shock and disbelief and Scott just smiled and nodded to him as he took his hand and helped him onto his feet and walked out of the private box and down into the main concourse of the Cinema.
They strolled together alongside the rest of the crowd until they reached the SUV and Scott helped his date climb into their seat. By the time he had reached his own and had started the car engine, Robert had managed to get some of his composure back. “How?” he said and Scott smiled and said “How what?”
“How do you know? What did I do or say?”
Scott smiled and leaned over to give Robert a reassuring kiss on the lips before reversing out into traffic and driving towards their restaurant.
“I’m the solicitor responsible for your mother’s estate. Therefore I know whether or not there are siblings or other family members who could potentially dispute the will and seek money even though you are the sole beneficiary. But your mother was an only child just like your father, whose estate my father handled 24 years ago - and therefore when you told me you were Robert’s cousin I knew that wasn’t the case. He has none. Plus you were always in the house while Robert was never available so that just confirmed what I guessed from the start.” He looked across at his date. “Robert Mitchell doesn’t exist!”
Robert’s face fell into a deep frown. “What do you mean I don’t exist?” and Scott laughed. “See? You even said that as Bobbi! Robert Mitchell is just the body that sits in an office Monday to Friday until its time to go home, am I right? When you get home you become Bobbi again and life’s better because you are being who you should have been all along. Correct?”
Robert nodded “Correct, but I’ve only known Bobbi a few weeks longer than you have. Before mother died I hadn’t presented as her. I only found some outfits while cleaning out mum’s wardrobes and started wearing them to see how it felt.”
Scott shook his head. “You did so because Bobbi was there all the time, suppressed and hidden and waiting for her moment to shine. You are too natural a woman to have only learned the traits in a couple of weeks. The way you hold yourself, the way you speak, the aura you give off is 100% female. You’ve only been presenting as Robert, Bobbi, because you were born with the wrong body parts.”
The car pulled up outside one of the town’s more upmarket restaurants and Scott leaned over and caressed Robert’s cheek with his hand. “Bobbi, I am not gay. I don’t date men, and you my darling are all woman and I love you.” He leaned in and they kissed passionately.
Scott then undid Robert’s seat belt and said “Right, come on. I want to buy my girlfriend a meal and find out more about her life and her interests and what we’re going to do next time I take her out which will be this weekend, agreed?”
Robert smiled and said “I love you, Scott” to which he replied “I love you Bobbi. Come on, I’m ravenous!”
This time when Robert took Scott’s hand he clenched it tight determined that he would never let this good man go. He was Bobbi now and Scott’s girlfriend. He didn’t care who saw him walk into the restaurant on Scott’s arm, he knew they were in love and that was all that mattered.
They were given a booth in a quiet part of the restaurant and Bobbi sat next to Scott. They held hands while they looked at the menu, Scott reassuringly stroking Bobbi’s wrist with his finger. The waiter returned to take their order and Scott said “”Bobbi? Ladies first!” She smiled and asked for the seafood linguini without the garlic bread as she didn’t want to kill any kissing there might be later with her foul breath. Scott asked for the sirloin steak and then ordered a half bottle of champagne, telling the waiter it was their anniversary. To which he replied “Oh, congratulations!” and departed.
Bobbi giggled. “And what anniversary is that?” she asked her boyfriend and Scott replied with a straight face “It is precisely 3 days 13hrs and 14 minutes since I first met you and my life changed forever. Now, if that’s not cause for celebration, I don’t know what is!” They stole a little kiss knowing they were not being looked at.
Scott continued “Besides we may have something else to toast to in a moment. Tell me about your job. You don’t like it do you?” Bobbi’s face fell. “No, I’m in a rut. I do Business Admin and I’m good at my job but I am in an office of 12 and there is little scope for advancement so I could be in the same role for years to come. I need the money and job security is a big plus and there are not many other options locally for me. I’m sort of demotivated working there.”
Scott nodded knowingly. “Qualifications?” Bobbi said dejectedly “I have the NVQ Level 3 and a Post Graduate Diploma but most of my colleagues have the same so it doesn’t really benefit me.”. At that moment the waiter arrived with the champagne and glasses and poured them each a flute before returning to the kitchen.
Scott raised his glass. “To the most beautiful girl in the world I am lucky enough to call my girlfriend! And Robert replied “To the most wonderful man in the world I am excited to believe loves me for who I am!” They clinked glasses and sipped the bubbly. Robert could not remember ever drinking champagne before and he marvelled at how he was now doing so with a boyfriend. His private life was changing completely. If only he could say the same about his work life.
Scott then spoke again. “The thing is, my father wants to retire from the business and leave it all to me to run. His PA is going to retire at the same time and I’ve been using her for my needs for the past 10 years or so!” He looked at Bobbi. “I need a PA with Business Admin experience and qualifications that can handle my work while I am out of the office and arrange the workload of our associates and trainees. Ideally she will be a beautiful, clever, committed and charming young lady that I can rely on and work closely with. Do you know anyone to fit that bill?” he asked with a knowing smile.
Robert looked shocked. Was he being offered a job by the man he had been snogging for most of the night? Before he could speak Scott said “Look, I know I barely know you, Bobbi, but I have always gone with my gut feeling and right now its telling me you and I are a perfect fit.”
Robert smiled as Scott took a hold of his hand and said “Consider this, please. The position is really one of trainee Solicitor. We would want the PA to have the same basic knowledge and skills of any solicitor in our company so there would be some on the job training and a starting salary of 27,000 per annum rising on successful completion of examinations to – well let’s start at 35,000 but it’s performance driven so it could be more.”
Robert’s jaw fell. The starting salary itself was more than he currently earned and he had the promise of advancement and career development to reward his hard work. Best of all, he would be working alongside the man he loved. Then his mind went into another direction. With that money he could have his own breasts and his own vagina and become a real woman physically, removing all trace of his former self. He could make a completely fresh start in his own life alongside this wonderful man.
“Bobbi? Please say yes” Scott said earnestly. “I want to spend every second of every day with you and I think you and I can make a fabulous team together.”
Robert shook his head. “I . . .I don’t believe this is happening to me! All of my dreams seem to be coming true on the same day!!” He looked into those gorgeous eyes once more and said “Scott, I would be crazy to turn your offer down. I trust you with my heart and now I trust you with my career and I would trust you with my life if I had to.”
Scott smiled and said “I’ll take that as a yes then?” and Bobbi giggled and said “Yes . . oh yes Yes YES!!!! “ she squealed as she grabbed hold of him and kissed him with everything she had. The waiter had happened to pass as she had responded and promptly refilled their glasses and whispered “Congratulations!” to Scott who nodded in response.
Robert got home around 1am that night by which time his lipstick was all over his mouth and his smile was as wide as the Cheshire Cat. The meal had been delicious and they had stopped off in a car park on the way home to kiss and caress each other like teenagers. It had been the best night of Robert’s life.
The next morning Bobbi went into work wearing a grey pencil skirt, white blouse and the black jacket she had bought the weekend before, together with a pair of black court shoes. She told her boss that she now wished to be known as Bobbi and would only answer to she / her pronouns. There was little negative reaction from her co-workers, in fact most spoke more to her now she was a female and when she showed them photos of her new boyfriend they were extremely jealous.
Scott and Bobbi started seeing each other twice a week but that soon increased to twice midweek and all weekend. Then 2 months after they had first met, Bobbi handed in her notice. Scott’s father had found a property in Spain he and Bobbi’s mother wanted to retire to. They both loved Bobbi when they met her, never being told she was anything other than a biological female and were thrilled that she would be working at the family firm. Scott’s old PA agreed to stay for another month to show Bobbi the ropes and where things were filed and who to speak to and who to ignore. She was a wonderful help and Bobbi got on so well with her they agreed to meet for coffee one lunchtime each week as friends.
Scott asked Bobbi to move in with him after 6 months and then popped the question on the following St Valentine’s Day. Of course she said yes. By that time she was well into a course of estrogen tablets and moving towards surgical reassignment surgery which followed 18 months later, paid for by the inheritance money he had received from his late mother’s estate. With that completed and Bobbi legally female Scott and Roberta Parker were married on the beach in Cala D’Or Majorca in the company of family and friends and like in all good tales, lived extremely happily ever after!
The End