breaking point

I've coped with a fair bit over the last six years of health troubles, so why have just spent the last half hour sitting in my living room crying my eyes out. My left arm was paralysed for more than month, cramps in my hands bend and twist my fingers and I've no control over them, even the drag in my leg that means using a cane to walk, so why does not being able to go to the toilet upset me so much? Everything the doctor has prescribed has had a minor immediate but temporary benefit, and then added added another problem. I've done everything recommended, but it just keeps getting worse, I don't think I've ever felt so low as this.