my brain is weird

My brain is weird.

I cant even have anxiety like a normal person.

Instead of the usual symptoms, heart racing, whatever, my brain has come up with a different idea.

It finds something else for me to focus on, and goes "hey look, over here, a shiny!"

The result is I can go a long time without even realizing something is making me anxious.

Then when I do, a massive amount of reluctance to even think about it kicks in. The harder I try to approach the center of the anxiety, the more the anxiety pushes back, till I would rather dance naked in a field of spiders than actually confront the thing I'm anxious about.

Sighs ...