An Itsy Bitsy Vacation

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ypdb.jpgAn Itsy Bitsy Vacation
By Anon Allsop

My stomach was in my throat, I had been building to this very moment for nearly three years. Standing before the mirror in the women's locker room, I trembled like a leaf. Draping a huge beach blanket over my shoulders, it surrounded me like a shroud.

I hesitatingly looked toward the door, "It's now or never, Kris." I whispered to myself, regretting the bet I had made with myself so long ago - to lose the weight and complete the transition. Hearing a tap on the door, I felt my heart racing - I knew it was my childhood friend.

He spoke through the door, "You worked too hard for this, Kris. You can do it." His support for me was unwavering.

Swallowing hard, I took a step toward the door - a speaker was playing music overhead, it was a tune that seemed all too familiar - today!

She was afraid to come out of the locker,
She was as nervous as she could be
She was afraid to come out of the locker,
She was afraid that somebody would see.
One, two, three, four, tell the people what she wore.

My heart was beating like a piston in a supercharged race car, I could swear I was hearing it echo off the wall in the small locker-room! I hesitated to look down but finally I did, the white of the bikini against my darker tan, created an illusion that I was even darker than I really was.

As if the small yellow flowers that created a pattern weren't bad enough, the song that was floating in the air became like salt in a wound. Mocking what steps I was taking on this day, and the past three years much like a folly!

It was an itsy, bitsy, teenie, weenie, yellow polka-dot bikini
That she wore for the first time today
An itsy, bitsy, tennie, weenie, yellow polka-dot bikini
So in the locker she wanted to stay
Two, three, four, stick around we'll tell you more.

I quickened my pace toward the beach, across the blazingly hot sand I raced. People milled and passed by, a few barely even gave me a glance. Pulling up short I faltered at the very edge, near where the water rolls onto the beach - I stood seemingly frozen, on one of the hottest days in weeks, the surf tumbling before me as it rushed in.

From the exterior loud speaker over the locker / concessions area, that damnable music floated across the sand, poking fun at my situation like some schoolyard bully.

She was afraid to come out in the open,
And so a blanket around her she wore
She was afraid to come out in the open
And so she sat bundled up on the shore!
Two, three, four, tell the people what she wore.

I watched the surf rolling in and out, several folks nearby were splashing and playing. To one side - a young couple were tossing a Frisbee. Again that song infiltrated into my thoughts, I balled my fists in frustration.

I grew angry over a stupid song playing. Angry as if it were mocking me - goading me with its unseen waves of sound. I clenched my teeth as the female voices chirped out the chorus.

It was an itsy, bitsy, teenie, weenie, yellow polka-dot bikini
That she wore for the first time today
An itsy, bitsy, tennie, weenie, yellow polka-dot bikini
So on the shore she wanted to stay
Two, three, four, stick around we'll tell you more.

I hesitated for only a few seconds under the protection of the oversized beach towel, my last true line of defense. Fear caught my heart, even though I knew that once I had divested the cover, I was fodder for all eyes to see. I swallowed hard and flung the towel from my shoulders and into the dry sand behind me. I made my way into the tumultuous surf.

Long before this summer vacation began, nearly three years ago before I had started my transition, I swore that I would diet and work my way into the tiniest swimsuit I could find - and make my way to the grand surf. Here I was and I wasn't about to back out now! This unveiling of sorts was my prize for going through what I had, just to get this way.

When paratroopers jump from their planes, they always shout out 'Geronimo' - Me? At the top of my lungs, I shout out something nearly as eloquent - screaming all the way to the water, "Shut up you stupid song!"

The water felt like ice! I swear my nipples were like razors, cutting completely through the skimpy top I wore. I was so sure that my lips had already turned a lovely shade of blue - and if my fingernails weren't painted, you would see that they too were blue. I stood as best as I could with the surf beating me about the head and shoulders. Even out here, intermingled with the sound of the surf, I could hear that song - mocking.

Now she's afraid to come out of the water
And I wonder what she's gonna do
Now she's afraid to come out of the water
And the poor little girl's turning blue.
Two, three, four, tell the people what she wore

A huge wave slammed me in the back and pitched my entire body forward. I came up coughing and angry, both knees stinging from being thrashed around in the sand by the crashing wave. I struggled to stand and pulled my long hair from where it was pasted to my face like the creature from an alien movie.

I stood in horror staggering with the surf. I was up to my shoulders in the water, as just beyond my reach floated the top of my bikini. The white with tiny yellow flowers danced and laughed at me as it rode upon the water.

No longer was I cold, no - the sudden warmth of embarrassment seemed to permeate throughout my body. All the while, I frantically tried to fathom how I was going to gather my top as it was being directed by some evil nautical entity toward shore...and still that damn song played!

It was an itsy, bitsy, teenie, weenie, yellow polka-dot bikini
That she wore for the first time today
An itsy, bitsy, tennie, weenie, yellow polka-dot bikini
So in the water she wanted to stay.
From the locker to the blanket
From the blanket to the shore
From the shore to the water
Yes, there isn't any more

I stood in the surf, seemingly pushed by waves from all sides. I was in the chest-deep water covering up my newly acquired feminine breasts as best as I could. Inwardly I was bawling, somehow I would have to make my way back to the shore. I turned away from the beach, subjecting my face to be pummeled by the next great wave. Tears cascading down my cheeks, but you would have never known, as with each incoming wave was mixed with my own tears. I felt I was slapped repeatedly in my face for such a foolish goal.

Feeling a tap on my shoulder I suddenly turned, a wave simultaneously slammed me forward and had it not been for the young man behind me, I would have been catapulted into the surf once again.

"Careful now!" My friend spoke as he caught me, and then assisted me into a standing position. "I think you lost something?"

I looked down, in his hand he held the all to familiar top I had lost in the surf. Nodding sheepishly I took it from him and then quickly turned away from him and re-hooked it back on.

Finally I turned back toward him, "Thank you, I'm so embarrassed." I began readjusting the thin straps once again, making sure it wasn't twisted. "God, I hope nobody saw what happened."

He gave me a boyish smile, "I did - I can honestly say that I couldn't take my eyes off of you... before or after."

Turning my face away from him, "You're just saying that."

"Kris, when you called me a month ago with this unveiling of yours, I thought you lost your mind. But knowing you since we were kids - well, I always knew the outcome was inevitable. I just never imagined you would turn out so beautiful."

I tried to pull away but he held me by my shoulders, forcing me to look him in his eyes. "You weren't fooling anyone when you left for college three years ago, especially me! Remember, you called me to meet you here at this beach for your unveiling." His grasp of my shoulders softened, "You were my friend long before this - that's why I jumped at the chance to see you again."

I looked down at myself, much of me was below the water. "So you aren't disgusted with me - disappointed with my change?"

He again smiled, lifting my chin with his hand. "Kris, this change in you makes it easier..."

"Easier?"

"I've liked you for a long time; I just never had the courage to speak openly to you about it. Since you've come back to me, I don't plan on ever letting you go!"

He placed his arm around my narrow waist and we began to walk up to the beach toward where I dropped my beach towel. "So, how far did you take your transition?"

"All the way." I looked toward him, and pulled my wet hair over my shoulder. Indicating my entire body, I asked, "And this doesn't faze you at all?"

"The change - not in the least." He said as he gently laid his hands on my hips. "You on the other hand, I find intoxicating!"

He looked around us waited while I combed out my long hair with my thin fingers and asked, "So, you going to swim anymore?"

"No, the surf is too rough for me. Were you planning on swimming anymore?"

"No, I think I'm done as well." He bent down and picked up my towel, "I don't think you need to be hiding under this anymore. How about you and I changing our clothes and going to get something to eat? It'll be my treat."

"Oh, something like a date?" I said laughing.

"Not something - exactly like a date."

As we began to walk toward the lockers I recalled the 'Bikini' song that had been playing, it had long since ended. Now, I became attuned to the speaker once again.

Chances are, 'cause I wear that silly grin
the moment you come into view;
chances are you think that I'm in love with you.

I began to hum that old classic song while I dressed. Perhaps I didn't mind that speaker after all? I pulled my jeans on and buttoned up the blouse I had been wearing when I came in to change.

I hesitated in front of the mirror and looked at myself; I definitely need to do something about these frumpy clothes. I decided from that day forward, I would dress befitting my new feminine status - and not try to hide what I was beneath layers of clothing. After all, I wasn't ashamed of who I was any longer.

I touched up my makeup and stood back to look at myself. Weight loss, hormones, implants - a little reconstructive surgery. I worked hard to see that image reflect back at me, matching what I was mentally with who I had become. I deserved to finally live my life - for me!

Just because my composure sort-of slips
the moment that your lips meet mine,
chances are you think my heart's your Valentine.

As I gathered up the items I had brought in with me I decided that before I had done anything else, I was going to go back to the hotel and change into something that showed off the woman I had become.

In the magic of moonlight,
when I sigh "hold me close, dear"
chances are you believe
the stars that fill the skies are in my eyes.

Pulling open the door, there stood my childhood friend waiting for me, somehow looking even more handsome to me than before. I didn't know what was planned for me - for us. But whatever was waiting, I planned to accept it with open and willing arms.

Overhead the song was ending... you know, I think I like that old speaker system after all.

Guess you feel you'll always be
the one and only one for me
and if you think you could,
well, chances are your chances are awfully good!

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Comments

Very Nice

joannebarbarella's picture

Well done, A.A.

I Liked That !

Particularly the clever way you wove the songs into the Story. Really neat. Well done !

Briar

Allsop writes the story...

Chances ARE ITS AWFULLY GOOD. Good story, one could only hope it fit some day.

My figure is only that good in my dreams. Thanks

Jessie C

Jessica E. Connors

Jessica Connors

very clever

I always hated that bikini song until today

A very lovely story!

A very lovely story! I imagined myself being in her situation. I felt every emotion she was going through!

The Accompanying Song

Daphne Xu's picture

I'd heard a version of the title of the song, and knew that it was a song. But that was it until now. Never knew the lyrics, and never knew it was about a terrified girl trying out a bikini in public for the first time -- an itty-bitty bikini at that.

For the protagonist, the song as broadcast by the speaker must have been the equivalent of "Nanny-nanny boo-boo!"

This story's a natural updating of the song. A TG would be terrified of going out in a bikini, in a way native girls no longer are. Slight difference, of course: she had the support of his/her best friend from childhood.

-- Daphne Xu

-- Try saying freefloating three times rapidly.

Excellent!

Really enjoyable short story, Anon! Thank you for writing and posting it! :)

Sweet

Short, sweet and beautiful.

hugs :)
Michelle SidheElf Amaianna